They were laughing in their matching neon pink t-shirts with the words “Bethany’s Birthday Girls” printed on the front. They were going bowling after school. Then to get pizza. Then a sleep over.
When Bethany passed out the shirts by her locker that morning I pretended to be too busy to notice. I stayed hyper focused on unpacking my book bag into my locker. And then I hurried off to my first class.
It was clear. Bethany had made a list of her friends and I hadn’t been included.
I thought I would be. We’d gotten together before. I’d invited her to my pool party.
No big deal, I tried to tell myself all day. I had plans that night too.
To sit at home. Alone. And wonder why I hadn’t been chosen.
It’s been years since I watched those neon pink shirts all pile into a station wagon after school and drive away.
But it hasn’t been years since I’ve heard the negative inside chatter that ensued afterwards.
“You’re not liked.”
“You weren’t invited.”
“You weren’t chosen.”
Here’s what I wish I could have told my little sans pink t-shirt self back then…And what I need to remember when those same feelings creep in today…
Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.
Not getting a pink t-shirt that day felt like a defining moment. And maybe it was for that day. I wasn’t invited to Bethany’s party. And that stunk.
But it wasn’t a defining moment of my identity.
It was a moment. And moments shift. People are fickle. People shift.
In the moment Bethany made the list of who to invite to her party, I wasn’t on the top of her mind. Not because she didn’t like me, but simply because she hadn’t thought about it.
It was a small situation.
And I can’t put the whole of my identity into the smallness of this situation. Or any other for that matter.
My Pastor used a verse in his sermon this week that echoes these same thoughts, “For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, AND YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST,” (Colossians 2: 9-10).
I have been given fullness.
In Christ.
I can place the wholeness of my identity in that reality… and see everything else as small in comparison.
I want to invite you to join Women of Faith’s Sheila Walsh and me tomorrow, January 29th, at 9:00 p.m. EST for a FREE webcast on how to combat negative inside chatter.
You can sign up to receive a reminder about the webcast by clicking here. We would love to have you with us!
And there are prizes!!! We’ll be giving away 2 adorable, tiffany blue Women of Faith bags packed full of all kinds of goodies during the webcast.
– a copy of Unglued
– a copy of the Unglued Devotional
– God Loves Broken People by Sheila Walsh
– Stumble Into Grace by Lisa Harper
– What Women Fear by Angie Smith
– Pink Women of Faith T-Shirt
– Necklace and bracelet
– Women of Faith bag
All you have to do to enter is leave a comment on this post stating what you’ve learned about “Inside Chatter” in your life! We’ll be discussing your insights and announcing the winner tomorrow night on the webcast, so go on and get to commenting 🙂
For this party, everyone is invited!
I have learned so much from unglued . I could not put the book down . My inside chatter was excessive and never stopped … It would change motive and direction… But was clearly always there . At times untold myself this motivated me to do better , try harder . However I now realize listening to this chatter , halted me from becoming the woman I am meant to be through Christ . I was so focused on making myself better , that I didn’t live who I was . I thought I did , but I wasn’t accepting me for who He made me to be .
Inside chatter is NEVER helpful to me, as it most always seems to be negative. Now as a mother of two precious girls I want to learn some tools to help myself and them turn that negative chatter off! I want them to feel empowered, and not defeated. My wish for them is to be confident young ladies who know God loves them. I do not want them to struggle for years like I did. I am excited for tomorrow night and all that may be revealed to me.
Inside Chatter: This has bombarded me my entire life and up until a couple of weeks ago, I just though I wasn’t good enough. However, I spoke to someone about these feelings staying with me 24/7 and realized the TRUTH! My God is GOOD Enough.
Thanks and I can hardly wait for tomorrow evening.
k
What have I learned about “Inside Chatter”? It can ruin my Outside Talk. When the voices are running their lips inside my head, oftentimes, they are making mountains out of molehills and connecting dots that are not even on the same page! It is just that – chatter that clogs up the God-inspired thought process. Because it is ME-inspired. So, when I find my mind turning the innocent episode into a matter of national security, I remembert this – I can chose to believe that I am created by God, and if my thoughts are not running down a path that lines up with who He says I am, it is time to stop to chatter in my head.
I’ve learned from inside chatter that I can’t place true CHRIST-LIKE merit on what other’s around me say or think of me.
I am wonderfully made.
I am beautiful inside & out.
I am created in HIS IMAGE.
I am worthy.
It is amazing the things we work in to our minds. And it is also important to realize how things we do impact others. I am so happy that God has me on his invitation list no matter what I do or have done! I hope to be able to participate in your webcast tomorrow. My daughter turns 13 tomorrow. Thanks for drawing us closer to him!
My “inside chatter” was almost always negative and it effected many areas of my life. I often allowed it to change my mood and attitude. Sometimes I have been so focused of the “inside chatter” rather than standing of the promises of the Lord. I will no longer let it control my thoughts. Just because a negative thought pops into your mind doesn’t mean you have to believe it!
Can’t wait for the broadcast. Plan to have my 15 year old daughter join me!
I don’t want her to have the same experiences with negative chatter that I have battled all of my life!
I have learned to interrupt my inside negative chatter and remind myself that I am a child of God. A chosen one yet still imperfect. I will fail at times but I have found to give myself and others grace in those situations. None of us are perfect but we learn from our mistakes and I thank Jesus for loving me regardless.
I’ve learned to RECOGNIZE when I’m having negative inside chatter…that was a huge step! Then to be able to stop those thoughts in their tracks and PRAY about the situation!
Looking forward to the webcast!!!
“Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.” – BOOM!!! That hurt…in such a good way!!! I have learned that if the “inside chatter” is not Philipians 4:8 than it is taking up unwanted and uninvited space in my head and heart and it needs to gets the steppin’ 🙂 !!!! Easier said than done, but I know that all I have to do is cry out to our Father and His Spirit will remove chatter and replenish with wholesomeness. 🙂
Can’t wait for tomorrow night!! I appreciate you ladies!!!
I have a lot of inside chatter, and most the time it seems to be negative. Really need to deal with this the right way.Thx
So glad to be getting these daily in my email. Loving the words about negative chatter. It is so easy to fall into that trap and I need the encouragement.
Internal chatter is a daily battle for me and I struggle daily. I have learned that I have to cast down as soon as it comes jnto my head or my battle is even harder.
I have read your Unglued book and now I am going through it again and taking notes. Inside chatter is a constant battle and I need the proper weapons to fight against it. Thank you, Lysa for helping me find them! Thank you for your post today – needed it. 🙂
I’ve learned that inside chatter can be overcome by God’s promises…when I remember them!
This Unglued book has come at a perfect time in my life when I need it most. With 3 children 8 and under, I tend to get unglued a bit too often. When I mess up, those labels and identities come creeping in my mind. But then I remember…imperfect progress!! I’ve got this. We can’t let the negative thought rule us but continue to renew our mind daily! I’d love to win this gift set! :)))
It was a moment. Moments shift. People are fickle. I so needed to hear these words today. I was listening to my inside chatter and those 3 little sentences changed my thinking. I am chosen. I am chosen by God. God defines me, not my circumstances nor others. Thank you for the reminder Lysa! God bless you!
Inside chatter tends to make a joyful day and turn it into something depressing and full of dread. Its good to be reminded that we do have fulness in Christ.
I have learned to focus on the ” whatever is True”. Even though the feelings of not measuring up may be there, I can rest in the knowledge that I am a daughter of the King and He loves me!
Negative inside chatter = Negative outside behavior. The cure? Jesus is helping me take baby steps practicing taking every thought captive and if it doesn’t line up with what I know God’s Word says then it is time to do battle and clean house – or mind in this case. Imperect progress but progress, nonetheless.
Wow Lysa! That was exactly me in high school – the girl always left out. It defined me for a long time, and still does at times. When that inside chatter starts up, my only option is prayer. I have tried positive self talk, but I negative self talk much better! The ONLY thing that stops it for me is talking to God.
I have learned that even when I recognize the negativity of “inside chatter” I can neither drown it out nor eliminate it ON MY OWN! Give me some Jesus help!
I haven’t started reading unglued yet – hope to start this week. I am looking forward to the web cast tomorrow night!
I just discussed this very topic last night with 4 sophomore girls during our small group time! There are so many battles that are going on in our thought life! And our thoughts influence our actions and beliefs. I challenged them (and myself) to think “great thoughts,” and to “take captive every thought that is not TRUTH and make it obedient to Christ.”
Amen Katrina! What a blessing to be talking to girls your age and encouraging them in God’s truth! YOU, by the grace of God, are going to make an impact for life in the outlook and ‘inlook’ of your friends! God bless you!!
I’m trying to recognize when the inside chatter starts and then put scriptures of WHO I am in the place. I AM fearfully and wonderfully made, I AM the righteousness of God through Christ. I AM dearly loved instead of the chatter that trys to tell me the opposite. Sweet Blessings.
I’ve learned that making assumptions is a form of lying. Now I try to combat the insecure chatter in my head by reminding myself to think only what I know to be absolutely true (ph4:8)
I defintely have/had the inside chatter going on in me and I have learned to cancel it out with promises from God’s Word. I am choosing to believe who I am in Christ and who Christ is in me. As I read your blog today the tears ran down my cheeks not so much for me but it was as if you were writing about my daughter. She is going through the same things at school with friends and not being invited to parties and different things that are being said to her and about her. I love all the truths you shared and I will be sharing them with her. This is so encouraging and I am so looking forward to the webcast tomorrow. 🙂
Inside chatter will destroy you. The enemy is always lurking and wants to harm us. I try to counteract every negative thought with a truth from The Lord. Over time, I am developing a habit of this. I will always have to work at it but at least it is a start. We are daughters of the King. What could be more wonderful than that? God bless!
This is a biggie for me right now. I have always been confident and secure, able to ignore the chatter, but being separated from my husband for 4 months now, its become a struggle. Hearing him say I’m a great wife but not the right wife for him has amplified those thoughts. I know in my head what is true but my heart feels otherwise.
Wow! The first few sentences read like diary entries from my childhood. The line “Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.” is such a powerful line. I will be sharing that with my ministry team. How often in our lives do we do that very thing. Thank you for being real and inspiring women like myself to open up and share their life experiences. God is good. I can’t wait to hear what you share this evening. Much love from 30,000 feet on my way home to Texas from Florida. Your blog today opened my heart to a reminder that my inside voice can sometimes be my worst enemy!
I never really realized how bad my inside chatter was until I read unglued. I never realized how it could fuel my anxiety or depression. I also couldn’t see how my inside chatter affected my outside as well. As I have begun to reign it in, I have seen multiple changes happen. Not only do I feel more open and receptive to what God is trying to tell me but I feel like there is finally space to be able to just think more clearly. To see things in a new way. To be able to see past the hurt or stress or worry and just remain in Gods loving grace through it. I now what my procedure manual for keeping my thoughts in check and I love it!!! Lysa I cannot thank you enough for being so honest in your book and in the ministries you do. You inspire me to continue growing in my relationship with Christ. I have hope for a prosperous future thanks to God and how he has used you and Proverbs31 ministries to reach others. Thank you.
Can’t wait to join the webinar !!
My negative inside chatter was non-stop. It would drag me down so far that I never thought I could get back up. Unglued has helped me be more aware of the inside chatter so I can stop it and say, “that is not me!” I know who I am in Christ Jesus.
I’ve learned I need to learn alot more! I’m starting Unglued bible study at church today for the first time.
I definately have to much inside chatter. How can anyone love me when my own mother doesn’t. I can’t expect love from my husband because I’m unloveable. My husband treats me the same way my family of origin treated me because I deserve to be treated that way.
I look forward to the broadcast! I need to remind myself daily the effects of negative chatter when not it in perspective.
I have learned that we are all loved by Christ. Inside chatter hurts others even though you or others might not realize. Sometimes I feel like that little girl that was not invited to the first boy-girl party that my cousin was having. I need to remember how others feel when they are not included. Satan loves to see division in the church and we need to stop that quickly
God taught me a great deal on this very subject last year! Taking every thought captive & making it obedient to him has been my daily goal. Trying to only think on what is pure, lovely, & true….and many times I’ve had to force myself to come up with something that fits that description! But, I am a living testimony that when we trust him & take him at his word, he will take care of all the details!! Thank you Lysa, for your post & for being so real.
Inside chatter is not a bad thing. IF it’s positive and based on God’s Word it will motivate, encourage, and strengthen. But if it’s based on the devil’s lies, it’ll sink your day in a second!!!!
I have learned that inside chatter is destructive. It’s kept me from true joy that comes from Him. It keeps me having a lack of faith and trust in the One that truly matters. I am constantly replaying hurtful conversations certain people in my life have had with me and it’s never productive. These people who have hurt me don’t think twice about it but I’ve allowed it to fester. I’m thankful that I can go to a Heavenly Father and ask for his wisdom and guidance. It’s a daily giving up of self…and I’m determined to not give up on become healthier in my mind for Him! He has so much more for me than this. Thank you for your passion and ministry!
I so appreciate this blog post today, not only for myself but also for my 6th grade (and 2nd grade) daughter, who has already experienced the same inner chatter, the same hunger to be liked, to be included, to be told and shown she is valuable and loved. I remember the pain I felt as a young girl but I also still struggle with those voices (really that voice of the enemy) sometimes, taunting me that I am not measuring up, I was left out, I am failing my family, I am failing God. My solace and my sanity is the “Voice of Truth” (love that song!) telling me I am His and He’s in control, not me. My great challenge and my Geary’s desire is to raise me daughters to hear and follow the voice of truth, and to reach out in love to others who are awkward, left out, hurting, and so precious and valuable to Jesus!
Catching neg thots when they’re little before they take root & establish themselves as permanent friends is helpful. Resisting the devil’s lies at the start helps me stand firm when my emotions are being pulled on in that ugly direction….
You know I’m 56 yrs young and I still have that inside chatter, mostly negative. I have to constantly stay in tune with my Heavenly Father in order to make this inside chatter “positive”. Can’t wait for the webcast!
I have learned a lot about inside chatter. This is one of my biggest issues, especially right now. It is so easy to get wrapped up in the lies of the enemy because he never stops trying. No matter what is going on in your life, the thoughts of, “I’m not enough,” or “she’s better than me.” Are always there. He’s not creative with his lies, I mean…he always uses the same ones with me. The thing he is picking at right now is that my boyfriend doesn’t value me. My boyfriend is an INCREDIBLE leader at LifeChurch.tv at the Stillwater campus, and he ADORES me. Even though I know in my head that he loves me, satan does everything he can to make me feel less important and unloved compared to his ministry. It is a battlefield of the mind to speak against lies that satan is saying, but we are given victory in Christ, and that’s what I try to focus on. It’s not always easy, and I know I still have a TON to learn about the battles of the mind. Every single day I learn more and more about my incredible loving savior, and those are the things that allow me to fight back 🙂
I am trying to silence the negative inside chatter. It can be so loud, and disguised as my own voice when those things are really coming from the enemy. I need to learn to recognize those thoughts when they come my way, and resist them. Lord help me.
I have learned that, for me, this will be a lifelong battle but I am not alone and memorizing God’s Promises to repeat to myself when those negative thoughts creep in is Crucial!!
What I’ve learned about my inside chatter is that it’s not usually from God. He wants me to feel like the loved and cared child of God that I am. Not that I feel that way too often.
What helps me is telling myself– Be still and know that I am God… Or other scriptures I have in my heart, but that one seems to quiet my crazies the best.
I’m reading Unglued for the second time, and boy, do I need it!! I realized that the Inside Chatter is the part that affects me most, especially at work, where in my own mind, people are thinking things about me that they aren’t in reality thinking. Why do we care so much what other people think when we have our FULL IDENTITY in Christ?! Thanks for driving that point home in the book, and hopefully, this second time around, it will stick!!
This was so good for me. I have read Unglued and am now going through a bible study called Soul Detox. I also read Battlefield of the Mind Devotional daily. I still am struggling with depression, but feel all of these are helping. I am doing my best to stay focused on God and His word and keep those negative thoughts out. I love your posts and am so encouraged.
I only want to try and not be the one who leaves others out, so pray everyday that I listen to His voice! WAITING for web cast tomorrow night! God be with all.
That I am wonderfully made.I am beautiful inside & out.I am created in HIS IMAGE.
I am worthy and no matter what others say about me or try to bring me down. GOD LOVES ME.
My brain seems to go into overdrive when it comes to the chatter that I “think” goes on around me. As a wife of a minister I feel that people analyze my motives or reasons for what I do or don’t do without really knowing me. It can really drive a girl nuts! At the end of the day I must be confident in knowing that pleasing and honoring my Lord and Savior is all that matters. While I know that others are watching me, and I do want to be a leader and example, I don’t answer to what their expectations are of me but instead I follow what Jesus wants me to do.
It’s amazing how longterm the effects of that inside chatter can have…I still find myself playing back those mental tapes from my youth…those times when I was rejected, not chosen, etc…but am reminded again in your words today that those do not define me. My worth, my ‘voice of truth’ is what God says about me. He says that I am made in His image and He loved me enough to die for me. That makes me someone of worth.
I have learned that “inside chatter” can do an enormous amount of damage to my self-esteem if I don’t fight back with God’s truth!
“Be Still and know that I am God.”
I have learned to replace negative “inside chatter” with positive words from the Lord
Oh gosh. . You just described my life. I feel sooo unaccepted at church. .. and the fact that I homeschool my kiddos already puts me in that “different” category. I feel that I can’t dress right, say the right things, or make the right decisions. I’m actually even reluctant to say how I feel about a lot of the things and judgemental attitudes that go on at my church for fear that someone else might be reading it from the same group. I am learning and seeing though, and boy is it freeing, that who I have to answer to is the Lord. They will never accept me unless I am just as they think I should be and have all the same opinions as they do.
Inside chatter only has as much power over me as I give it. I try to spend more time in God’s word to help me deal with the inside chatter and to put it where it belongs…
I have learned that “inside chatter” is something that brings me down. I have to learn to let it go and replace it with positive thoughts. Also, it helps to just be silent and be still and let God settle and erase the inside chatter. Resting in Him allows the weariness of the inside chatter to fade away.
It is still a learning process for me. I am learning to hear the voice of my Savior who loves me. Fear is not from Him!
Your words always seem to resonate with what I’m dealing with at that moment. Thank you for giving a new perspective to look at the things that seemed to repeatedly trip me up. I’m slowly learning to PRAY instead of reacting as if the situation means everything.
Can’t wait to hear this broadcast! I battle the negative chatter everyday but praise God for His voice of truth that says “this is my daughter and she is perfectly and wonderfully made”. I am so thankful that when the whispers of lies start creeping in I can get on my knees and be reminded of the true worth I have in the eyes of my savior…and His vision is never blurred! 🙂
About a year ago I started to pray to God to help me get rid of the negative chatter. It’s worked every single time! I’ve learned so much in one year and I’m still learning. I’m glad that God has been able to help other people too!
Inside chatter is often completely opposite of the Truth of God’s Word. It takes intentional effort to line it up with the Truth of the Bible.
I am new to “Unglued” and cannot wait to experience it. I can already see that “inside chatter” is always on our side. I worry about how my “inside chatter” effects my parenting and my relationships. I making myself a date for the webcast.
this is so timely for me! excited to learn ways to be constructive about this negative behavior! thank you!
I can’t wait to share your blog post with my 12 year old daughter after school today. My prayer is that she will resist the temptation to find her identity in the smallness of the many situations she faces in Middle School. I want her identity to be centered in Christ. She is defined by HIM.
Isn’t it amazing that we talk to ourselves in ways we’d never dream of talking to others? This has been an awakening to me. Now I tell myself…”Ellen, if your friend was saying these things about herself…what would you tell her?”. God thinks I’m more than good enough!
“I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;[a] Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well” (Psalms 139:14 NKJV)
I have learned that “inside chatter” is more often times than not fueled by my emotions. God has been teaching me lately that my emotions are fickle, and they do not always represent Christ. God says that I am beautifully and wonderfully made in His image (paraphrasing, of course). To say that I am not wanted, loved, chosen, good enough, or any other thing is to deny Christ Himself. He has called me, He has chosen me, and He has deemed me good enough to any task He calls me too. I’ve learned to speak those scriptures over myself when “inside chatter” tries to tell me lies! <3
Negative chatter – it is a constant and incessant battle inside my head. Inside all our heads really. But I have a weapon ~ an Almighty and All Powerful weapon!!
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2Cor10:5
I CHOOSE Jesus – His Truth. His Promise. His Grace I cling to Him and reject each and every voice and thought as it bullies its way to the front of my conscious. I reject the lie and choose The Truth. Sometimes all I am able to muster is a whispered, desperate “Jesus help me”…but it is enough.
When I read Unglued I feel like the book is written for me! I have had so much negative chatter in my head since I was a young girl. It has affected many relationships and friendships for so so many years. With the help of Unglued, I am finally learning how to handle my emotions.
Inside chatter can be so destructive. Growing up, I was very much loved by my family and never felt like I was “less than” anyone else. Until middle school. Oh goodness, how I hated middle school. And I went to a Christian school where the cliques were already formed and new kids weren’t invited to join. That’s when I started wondering what was wrong with me. Why couldn’t I be a part of a group? Had I done something wrong and not realized it? I never got those answers and went all through middle and high school feeling that way. By the time I got to college, I didn’t care. I finally realized God made me, God loved me, and I was exactly who he wanted me to be and I wasn’t the one with the problem. And yet, I can’t deny, sometimes, when I’m around certain people, other authors, speakers, musicians, etc, and I get “looked over”, that little voice wants to come back and take a dig with, “What’s wrong with me? Why am I all of a sudden invisible?” Looking forward to the webcast. 🙂
Much too much of mine is NEGATIVE. I’m trying to recognize it and turn this over to Jesus, but it’s often hard.
I’ve learned that negative inside chatter makes me feel insecure…when I feel most threatened by satan’s attacks on my family…like sheep, I look to my Shepherd, Jesus Christ, to protect us–to keep the 99 and to go after the one that is lost–according to His sovereign plan, and His will, as I allow Him to put me on His shoulders to rest….thanking Him for how He is working in mylife and my family’s lives…like the Shepherd’s little sheep in the 23rd Psalm, I see myself and my family lying down in green pastures beside the still waters…He is protecting me, He has my back, and my family’s back, His plans will not be thwarted…and I hear God saying…”Trust me…I’ve got this!”
“Inside chatter” can stir up so many un-Godly emotions. I’m trying to combat my inside chatter with God’s Word and teach my 14 & 16 year old girls to do the same. It’s not easy but with God all things are possible. Looking forward to the webcast.
What have I learned in my life about inside chatter? I have learned that it will ruin precious moments, it will take over days, and most of all that it will get to even the very best of all of us if we let it. I have also learned that if we make the conscious decision to listen to the still small voice of our Lord and Savior, then the chatter has no other option except to back down and go back where it came from. Our peace in Jesus Christ is one of the greatest gifts we receive from our Father, and it is there for the taking at all times if we choose to. Everything, inside and out, comes down to the constant obedience of our Heavenly Father.
We really must learn to use the arsenal that God through grace has made available to us to combat negative chatter. We are defined by Him and are His bride; wonderfully made and lovingly held in His arms through the trials and tribulations of life. There will always be storms and rain clouds that can dampen our days but with Him we can know peace and that this life and its snubs are small in the scheme of everlasting life. I have found that reframing my day has helped immensely, starting with some devotion and prayer time (might be as small as scripture taped to my bathroom mirror as I get ready to work and a “daily bread” type reflection and scripture as I eat a quick bite with coffee). I listen to “christian” themed music and teachings on the way to work in the car as well as pray on the way. Throughout the day as the barbs of relational issues arise and my persona is battered, I have to make a conscious effort to stop the negative talk (instead of I really screwed up that presentation to “in all things,God has equipped us to do wonderful things in His power”) It is a constant reframing of thoughts into positive affirming ones that are based on how God sees us and how He plans to use us.
I can give great advice, or encouragement to others, but tear myself apart. In the last two plus years I’ve worked from home and being alone most of the day the inside chatter gets crazy :0/. I’ve realized I masked my feelings with humor. Now there is no one to joke with and made to face my feelings. Looking forward to your webcast
So freeing to know that inside chatter doesn’t define me… Defining moments don’t define me. God’s words define me. Can’t wait for the webcast!!!
I have learned that inside chatter will ruin precious moments, it will take over days, and most of all that it will get to even the very best of all of us if we let it. I have also learned that if we make the conscious decision to listen to the still small voice of our Lord and Savior, then the chatter has no other option except to back down and go back where it came from. Our peace in Jesus Christ is one of the greatest gifts we receive from our Father, and it is there for the taking at all times if we choose to. Everything, inside and out, comes down to the constant obedience of our Heavenly Father.
I am 41 and have been in my job for many years I still let that festive chatter seep in. I have to remind myself, sometimes on a daily basis that these things don’t matter. I wish I had known all this when I was growing up. And how, as a mom was in insecure, do you help build confidence in a young girl who is just like her mommy?
Internal chatter is best handled with geting what’s inside, out. Idealy, confronting the issue/person directly is what’s needed. Putting it off will only allow the simmer, steam, boil. It develops other feelings like dread or strife and those are poison to your soul. If you’re not the confrontational type, at least get it out. Be careful not to go running to the phone to only result in gossip and resentment that can build if the person on the other end just adds fuel to the fire instead of talking it through with you. When my mind is full of chatter, especially when I can’t sleep, I write it down. I’ll write in a journal or head to my computer to get the thoughts out of my mind and onto paper. Those tormentive thoughts that bounce around in your brain are looking for a way out and far too often they come out through our mouth without first being filtered. When I write it down I feel a release. Sometimes, that’s all I needed to do, put it into writing. The saying “sleep on it” is actually quite true. I’m amazed at how often I’ll write out some intense thoughts or urgent matters in my mind, to only re-read them in the morning and wonder “what on earth made me harbor that feeling, it really isn’t that bad”. Feelings are first a reaction, but then are a decision. The faster we can stop a thought from turning into a poor reaction the more mature our minds are.
The chatter going on inside hinders relationships on all levels. I am reading Unglued now and I see so much of myself and my reactions to chatter. Praying that the Lord will help to take these things captive and learn to trust Him. This chatter is false and I need to remind myself, sometimes every hour, that my God has greater things for me and he already knows what the outcome will be. He promises to have a perfect plan for us. I trust that.
Inside chatter has always been a constant battle for me to avoid. I always felt different during school years. I made some bad choices which made thigs worse. I have compared myself and my life to others more than I care to remember. Now when the inside chatter starts I remember the song by David Crowder Band Oh How He Loves Us. I sing it to myself over and over and just try to sink into the lyrics and stop focusing on whatever it is that has made me think I’m not good enough in that moment and remember that God has chosen me and that He has plans for me to prosper.
I have struggled with inside chatter for as long as I can remember. Reading Unglued has helped to to really think about what’s going on in my head as I have these hard, untrue thoughts. Asking myself questions about why I think these things has truly helped to quiet these negative thoughts that lead to negative emotions. Also, I really like to recite the Serenity Prayer to myself and remind myself that The Lord is always there to help me through anything that life throws at me. I’m not alone… And that thought helps so much!
Just took your unglued assessment – the results described me perfectly. I plan on listening to the webcast and reading the book later this week..
I have spent most of my life fighting the inside negative chatter of my head. The words or actions of others and the even more hurtful words I have told myself have caused me years of pain and depression. I am trying to keep that negative chatter to a minimum and not let it take over and cause me to be in fear of living. I want to live life to the fullest and teach my children to enjoy the blessings God has given us. The chatter that used to consume days at a time is something He can help me overcome!
I’ve learned that sometimes the chatter is so subtle that I barely notice until I’m feeling blue, disappointed, angry, etc. It is then that I ask myself what messages am I listening to? I have to make an effort to ask God to replace those messages with the TRUTH of His word. This helps to shut down the negative, unholy, useless lies!! Thank you for your ministry in the lives of women.
When we are “left out”, whether by oversight or by a mean-spirited person, we can turn to someone who is even more “left out” and include them in a fun activity or outing. Reaching out to others always lessens our sadness because we are showing a Jesus kind of love.
I agree totally, Julie. Thank you for reminding me.
I seem to lean toward the negative inside chatter simply because it’s easier, more comfortable, it appeases my ‘flesh’ so to speak. BUT it’s not God…God is the tiny whisper that tells you to go in the opposite direction.
i’ve learned that feelings are fickle. that the thoughts in my head hurt way more than the words or actions of another. that depending on the day i can be hurt, angry, happy or thankful for the same thing. that controlling my tongue is as difficult as controlling my thoughts. but with Christ we are a new creation. that the trials he brings us through are to make us full and complete, not lacking anything. and i trust him. with my whole heart.
When I start hearing the inside chatter, I reassure myself that God doesn’t think those things about me, and all that matters is what he thinks.
It’s hard not to make every situation about you. As humans we crave acceptance and we generally tie that directly to how we are treated. In my mind I constantly critique conversations and what was said and what it could have “meant.” The constant struggle over seeking acceptance from my acquaintances and friends can truly be overwhelming. I thank Christ that his acceptance is a given. He means what he says and he whole heartedly loves me. Screw-ups and all!
Chatter from within creeps up louder and louder when I am not constantly in the Word, and allowing outside “things” to creep in casually…rated R movies, TV shows that are funny, but not glorifying God, and friends/colleagues that I should be praying for rather than keeping up with or the materialism/body images, etc. It is a life long process, I have learned to keep it together, being on fire all the time not to be ashamed to walk away in a gossip fest or to make choices on what I stand on.
What I’ve noticed is that my inside chatter has to be radically changed by Gods truth. I grew up with a verbally abusive stepfather who threw much chatter at me- this became what I knew as “who I am” over the years. Thankfully, at the age of 14- I came to know Christ and the TRUTH of who I really am. I am wholly and dearly loved-perfect and complete in Him alone and nothing else (thank you made to crave). Praise God for his truth!
I grew up in a abusive home. I spent a lifetime having conversations in my head. Did I do it right? Will she like or or will she be angry and reject my hard work? This environment grows uncertainty and insecurity so much that as I grew into womanhood it became my outside chatter as well. It not only was the means by which I made decisions it became the way my eyes viewed the world and processed life. Praise God He can reach you from the inside out. As God came to renew and revive my broken spirit and heart He began the process of retaining my brain by using people and gifted writers and Bible studies. Then I began to follow. For years i knew there were issues but couldn’t figure out that internal change needed. In Unglued the door flew open and my ears could hear and I saw change happening. In hearing I was able to defeat yet another inside chatter battle. Why cant I stop. I know I’m more than this spewing of emotions. Being a willing vessel allows God to move my mountains and my landscape of life continues to be transformed in ways I never could because He is mighty and sees the whole while I’m able to see the speck. I’m so excited to dig deeper and let God wow my heart and mind by you abs Sheila’s message. I’ve even wrangled some of my sweet sisters from our women’s group to show up so we can watch God show out in our lives and through your obedience. At 41 my life is His exciting journey hopeless no longer. Broken yet no longer bound. Beauty is the only thing in the eye of beholder. Freedom comes to a willing spirit.
So appropriate for what I experienced on Friday of last week. My inside chatter has included some “cussing words” (from your blog for today) re: being wronged, etc. My friend reminded me of the quote “Hurt people hurt people” and I know this is true. I think I am taking baby steps forward and I end up taking giant steps backward. I’m praying and asking God for peace and closure about the situation last week. I’ve just recently started reading your blogs after a friend recommended reading it, and also Holly Gerth said your book “Made to Crave” was the best book for losing weight. I look forward to reading it.
I have struggled with this problem all my life.. Always being the kid that just didn’t fit in, made fun of at school, no friends growing up, overweight… You begin to believe what people day to a point where you make fun of yourself and cut yourself down like everyone else.. Jesus has saved me more then once when all else fails. Now I still struggle with those inside demons, but I am learning God is with me in the darkest of times to show me there is always light and love in my life even when I can’t see it.
Couple of thoughts….One of the first passages I ever memorized was Eph. 4:29….”Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” The “mouth of my mind” is more powerful than my physical one — no one can hear the words that tear me down, that tarnish the Image of God that I am. The more open we are with each other about our inside chatter the more we can speak God’s truth into one another’s life to rebuild what has been torn down. We need THAT kind of friendship. Imagine being in a group of women who fill themselves up with the truth of God’s word for YOUR benefit, not simply their own. Talk about doing life together!! Final comment: I sure hope the Women of Faith t-shirt isn’t neon pink 🙂 Blessings!!!
What I know about the chatter going on in my mind is that there is an awful lot of it going on in there. It’s swirling around pulling me this way and that and it’s making me dizzy. Lord help me to clear up this chatter and help me to focus on You!
I have struggled with this problem all my life.. Always being the kid that just didn’t fit in, made fun of at school, no friends growing up, overweight… You begin to believe what people day to a point where you make fun of yourself and cut yourself down like everyone else.. Now I still struggle with those inside demons, but I am learning God is with me in the darkest of times to show me there is always light and love in my life even when I can’t see it.
I am starting to have some victory in this area but still have a long way to go. Imperfect progress towards consistently going the Phil. 4:8 route instead of the negative chatter route.
I spent a lifetime having conversations in my head due to life at home. Did I do it right? Will she like or or will she be angry and reject my hard work? This environment grows uncertainty and insecurity so much that as I grew into womanhood it became my outside chatter as well. It not only was the means by which I made decisions it became the way my eyes viewed the world and processed life. Praise God He can reach you from the inside out. As God came to renew and revive my broken spirit and heart He began the process of retaining my brain by using people and gifted writers and Bible studies. Then I began to follow. For years i knew there were issues but couldn’t figure out that internal change needed. In Unglued the door flew open and my ears could hear and I saw change happening. In hearing I was able to defeat yet another inside chatter battle. Why cant I stop. I know I’m more than this spewing of emotions. Being a willing vessel allows God to move my mountains and my landscape of life continues to be transformed in ways I never could because He is mighty and sees the whole while I’m able to see the speck. I’m so excited to dig deeper and let God wow my heart and mind by you abs Sheila’s message. I’ve even wrangled some of my sweet sisters from our women’s group to show up so we can watch God show out in our lives and through your obedience. At 41 my life is His exciting journey hopeless no longer. Broken yet no longer bound. Beauty is the only thing in the eye of beholder. Freedom comes to a willing spirit.
I am just now starting to realize the negative effects of this chatter inside my head. I love how Lysa reminds us that “can’t put the whole of my identity into the smallness of this situation.” I know when things don’t go my way, I sometimes take that specific instance as evidence of EVERYTHING that is messed up in my life. When in reality, I’m doing a lot of things right. I’m trying to replace the negative chatter with God’s voice. Reciting scripture is a good one that I’m trying to get better at. Looking forward to the webcast! 9 pm is great because the little ones are in bed!
Working to quell inside chatter is a lifelong endeavor. Curve balls come our way all day every day, and we have to continually work on staying positive and focused.
One thing I’ve learned about Inside Chatter is I’ve got a lot of it! Our Unglued bible study hasn’t gotten to the chapter on Negative Inside Chatter yet, so I just had to go read it. And oh my, that is seriously a huge problem in my life. I think I could be the spokesperson for Inside Chatter. Ugh. I can clearly see how it has affected me in a very negative way – in so many areas of my life. Sadly, I often allow the Inside Chatter to be the reins that steer me. BUT… I can also see that when I am doing well, those are the times when I have been in God’s Word and allowed the Truth to sink in. When He’s been the Controller, and not my negative thoughts. I’ve also learned that it helps when I talk to a friend about the inside chatter. Sometimes just getting those thoughts out in the open helps me see how misguided they really are.
What I’ve learned is this: If what I’m thinking doesn’t agree with Gods Word…then it is WRONG! Because His Word is always right. I have to align my thinking with His thinking. And to do that, I need to know what He thinks. So, I read and pray and listen….
I have read “Unglued” and have taught it and getting to teach it again. The Inside Chatter was an eye opening chapter to me – I have always had negative chatter – you are not good enough, not pretty, not smart, etc. Reading about your experiences and your helps have been helpful. I am complete in Jesus, He sees me as all the things I think I am not, but coming to realize I am!
Looking forward to the webcast tomorrow.
When I was 4, I went looking for my usual playmate at my aunts house ( we had in common that we both were adopted) and was told by another child “She was naughty so they gave her back”. Unknown to my parents, I then told myself “never be naughty or they’ll send you back too.” Back in the fifties, if I was silly, my Dad would tease ” Hey, keep that up and we’ll give you back to the Indians” but I told myself ” Oh, I must have come from Indians” and started withdrawing: my parents thought I was just “a very quiet, easy child to raise”. Gods word and conferences and a Christian counselor have worked miracles in my life and my Godly husband is helping me see Satan’s use of “coincidences” to keep me silenced- now I am growing into the ministries God has for me ( Grandma/Nanny, church musician and training others to do so too.) Your devotions are SO beneficial. I know God is blessing all of you women for your outreach to all of us.
Thanks for reminding me that only God’s opinion is what I should be worried about. I deal with alot of self esteem issues and even if others are not talking about me I can just “imagine” what they are thinking. I plan to tune in tomorrow night and see what you gals have to say on this subject. You are truly a Godsend Lysa and I pray you can continue on your journey of setting others free of their inner battles!
I’m with you Tonya, Lysa is a Godsend! I’m very excited to learn more tomorrow night!
We just began to study Daniel and it’s also talking about our identity! I’m thankful as an adult to know where my hope comes from but as we encourage our daughter and her with teenage friends it’s a powerful reminder to tell them! My favorite is to tell them that their identity as Daughter of the King of Kings! You’ve been chosen and should feel loved by Christ himself! Thank you for the post!
My insight to ” Negative Chatter” is that it is the baggage that we carry with us for many years. Yet Jesus loves us for our unique and special selves. It is me that carries the chatter and when I fully embrace the love of Jesus it will only be then the chatter will cease.
I didn’t know the impact of inside chatter or actually that it was something that had a name. I didn’t know that I actually had that problem at all until I spoke to the cashier at the local Christian bookstore who, out of the blue, started talking about a book that hea had read recently (by Joyce Meyers) that discussed that exact problem. It was almost as if God had put it on his heart to talk to me about it. I lay in bed almost every night after being awakend in the middle of the night (only God knows why) and can’t go back to sleep. I think about everything and more and my mind makes up all of the possible scenarios that could happen. I think of all of the possible reasons why things happen as they do. The next thing I know, it’s 3 hours later and i’m still awake and it’s time to get up. And I am no better off than when I woke up. I am actually more frustrated with all of the things I had been replaying and creating in my head. I am looking forward to this webcast because I really think that it will give me a lot of insight into that problem that I only recently realized that I have.
I have dealt with inside chatter for so long, and I never had a name for it until I read unglued! I want to thank you so much for writing this book and allowing me to see the truth in all the lies that my inside chatter has been telling me. I felt as though I was so alone no one else could understand the struggle that I would deal with sometimes on a daily basis. That was and is a lie, and I don’t have to feed into the lie. I am now starting to pick up my bile and feel my mind with Gods truth that He loves me, He forgives me! He will never leave me or forsake me. It is not always easy but I am a work in progress thank you Jesus and thank you Lysa you will never truly know how much your books have meant to me.
This is getting better as I get older…maybe now I just forget or simply choose to focus on what is important in my life and who did invite me to their party…not who didn’t!!!
I am so glad that you posted this today, Lysa! I have struggled my whole life with “Inside Chatter”…no matter how well I did is school, in sports, in life…that chatter made me feel “less than”. And, now that I’m a mom of an almost 21 year old girl, I find myself speaking to her about her “Inside Chatter” and encouraging her to turn it off NOW…before she is my age and still wrestling with it.
Pastor’s message was so spot on this weekend! I clung to those words as you did…“For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, AND YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST,” (Colossians 2: 9-10). Knowing that in Him and through Him, I am full is such a gift. As I wrote my notes during the sermon, I gave that a “double star” (**)…because I wanted to discuss it with my daughter later in the day, hoping she had held on to that as well. We are so programmed for the competition, that we overlook the fact that we are not all called in the same way…learning to accept that is such a challenge in our world of being successful and having it all together all the time.
I am trying to teach my daughter from my long-running, on-going struggle to be “alright” in who we are…to know that we are who God says we are…and any other “chatter” that we might hear, is just that…nothing compared to the word of our King!
In Christ.
I’ve struggled all my life with inside chatter. Just this past weekend it hit me hard and it caused hurt feeling between my husband and myself. My sister forwarded Sitting Home Alone to me.Reading it and the scripture you gave helped remind me that my identity is in Christ not people.
I think the inside catter is the worst. At least I think I’m my worst enemy sometime! Thanks for always covering my life topics!
Inside chatter debilitated me for most of my earlier years. Once I began to realize how destructive it was, I had to challenge those negative thoughts/lies that had become my truth. I could only do this with the word of God. Not just knowing his word in my head (because I was good at that) but rather allowing his truth to invade my heart. This took time and was a process. Pastor Bill Johnson has a quote I just love “I can’t afford to have a thought in my head that’s not in His”.
As I grow more in Christ, I still face negative chatter in my life, but I don’t let it take hold to my life. I can say, that as a believer in Christ, I recognize it for what it is, and I am able to hand it over to my God. Strength and wisdom comes from Him!
I just finished the your Unglued book with two dear friends along with the accompanying video done in Florence, Italy. It was such a blessing to each of us as we were able to share our own stories and encourage one another. We all deal with that negative inside chatter at one time or another and it is freeing and liberating to know we are not alone and that there are God designed ways to deal with that…and hope for that imperfect progress.Thanks for doing what God called you to do so many of us can walk with one another in these area’s and be assured of God’s love and our significance to him. I was able to minister to one of these friends 10 year old daughter this weekend who is having some struggles of her own at such a critical time in her young life. We baked and sewed and then went for a treat at the local coffee shop. I trust that by blessing her with that kind of love and attention from God’s heart, then from mine to hers will assure her that she is loved.
Through the years I have learned that most of the time my inside chatter tends to be worrisome or negative. Even when I know that I am loved by God and forgiven beyond my comprehension that chatter seems to tell me that I am not worthy or that I have fallen short in so many ways. Why is it so hard to accept all that God has provided for me through Christ and learn to accept myself as the person that He made me to be? I look forward to the broadcast as I gain insight into how to combat the negative! Thanks for your insights and ministry!
We are not chosen by the friend, the boy, the employer…. The list can be endless. We are chosen by the only One that matters. His choice is not just based on what we allow others to see in us but also in what we keep hidden. We are chosen despite the mess that only He can see.
I have learned that I have to filter out what is being said in my head as to whether it is coming from myself or the enemy. Then I will have a better idea on how to overcome it.
I lost my dad to a heart attack when I was 6 and kids can be cruel, so the chatter began when the bullying about not having my father. From that point on I fought with myself in a constant way about what everything that happene must have really meant an ht it had an underlying meaning that lead to more chatter of being unworthy. I struggled with an eating disorder as a young girl and then feeling like there was no better choice after high school ran into a career in the military. I ended that after 3years with PTSD and an uphill battle with more chatter than ever until I realized that there was a stop button to all te negative words in my soul. All the positive words in the Bible. I have found so many awesome truths that have helped me silence a great deal of the chatter and am really learning to be a conqueror!
Thank you, Lysa, for being so real and inspiring. I know God is using you to minister and mentor other women. So many times it seems like He speaks directly to me through your words.
Inside chatter…a tough one, I tend to be so much harder on myself than I am on others. Your blog especially the direct statement:” Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.” reminded me to keep it all in perspective. I must give grace to myself in the same way I give to others and as the Lord gave to me.
As a mother, it is imperative for me to conquer this and acquire a new vision that allows grace for myself and encourages inside chatter of a loving nature so I may foster the same spirit within my daughter. I look forward to starting this imperfect progress by watching the webcast with my daughter. Again, than you.
Negative inside chatter is definitely something I struggle with. We went through Unglued in our Ladies Small Group and I realized that this is one of the major things that triggers negative reactions for me. Negative inside chatter, when I can’t seem to overcome it, causes me to say things that undoubtedly hurt the other person. I do this most with my husband…much like you shared about the situations with your husband in the book, Lysa. I assume my husband is thinking negative things about me…otherwise, why would he say/do that?! 🙂 I end up telling him that he thinks this or that about me, none of which are actually truth, and that hurts him! My negative thoughts and accusations make our arguments longer and more intense. I need to learn to believe in my worth in my husband’s eyes, but ultimately in God’s eyes. I am so excited about the webcast tomorrow night! I’m signed up and ready to go! Thank you so much for your ministry, Lysa! It has touched my life, the lives of my small group ladies, and so many others! Blessings my sister! 🙂
When those inside voices try to say I am not a good mom, not a good wife, etc….I am reminded I AM a Child of God!!! Reminding myself I am a child of the King keeps me from putting myself down. I am a child of God, I have children that argue. I am a child of God, I have rooms at home that need to be cleaned. Thank you Lisa for reminding me who I am in God!!!
Russell Stover Valentine Day Candy Straws-still hurt my heart to this day-My father withheld his love and approval of me, my entire life. One Valentine’s Day he handed each of my sisters a bag of Russell Stover Valentine’s Candy Straws, except me. I stood there watching, with my heart breaking, but never saying a word. My father’s actions spoke louder than any words he could have spoken-You Marilyn are not good enough, You Marilyn have deeply disappointed me, You Marilyn do not deserve to be loved, You Marilyn are not worthy of my lattention. My father died in 1995 but the hurt and negative inside chatter continues-
This is a post I needed. I struggle daily with this. Not good enough, not a good mom, or wife, can’t do anything, God does not love me. I so often let the negative chatter control my brain. I am learning to not listen and to cling to God’s truth, but it is a hard trip. Thanks for all you do.
I just had an “aha” moment for sure! My inside chatter voice is almost like the TV playing in the background. It’s constantly going….it never stops, but I have the CHOICE to decide what channel I’m going to play. The fulfilling sounds of my creator or the draining lies of the enemy. Thanks Lysa for leading me to this moment. I’m tuning into a positive uplifting channel of inside chatter today!
I’ve learned that the destructive internal chatter of, “not good enough, not pretty enough, not organized enough, not desirable, not measuring up,” can be shut down and shut up when I take a moment daily to remind myself of all the things my Heavenly Father says I AM.
This really hit home for me today. Thank you for this post today.
I can picture myself in those days feeling the same way. But what really hit home was yesterday in my hometown. A 11 year old girl took her life. She was tired of being bullied and picked on and being left out. Her mother said she cried everyday and just wanted to fit in. I feel if only someone would have told her about God maybe she would be here today. I think about my 11 year old son and pray he never feels this way. She felt alone and felt this was her lonely way out. I pray for a way to reach children that feel like this little girl did. I pray that God will show me way to reach out to them and show them his love and grace. I pray for this little girls family and friends and for my son for knowing her and wish he could have helped her some how if he only know. In Jesus name Amen
Letting go of inside negative chatter is hard. As you reminded us in Unglued, we need to humble ourselves as we turn to God letting, Jesus work for good, opening our eyes to recognize and keep Satan away and use conflict for Good in Jesus name.
We only think we know what others are saying about us. They may not be saying anything. Wasted time on negative chatter…Satan just loves to use that time against us.
Thank you for the tiemly reminder to hold every thought captive. I’ve struggled with this for years and am trying to re-route my thoughts by expressing my gratitude to God for all He has provided. Looking forward to learning more tomorrow. Thank you for your ministry!
I’ve learned that the negative thoughts have hindered me from walking into or even finding my purpose. I’ve not allowed myself to be completely free and open for the fear of being rejected. It’s easy to think negative thoughts or areas of improvement but harder to truly see myself as God has created me to be. He did not create me to walk in fear so why I am hesitant to let people see the true me. Again, it’s the fear and lack of control that hinder me. It’s not until I completely surrender the need to control that the negative thoughts are given to God.
One of my dear friends of almost 30 years went home to be with his Savior last night. He always included everyone in all he did and never had a bad thing to say about anyone. Anytime these negative thoughts about not fitting in or that I wasn’t good enough would creep in my mind and life, I knew I could call him up and we would have the best time … Always laughing!!! Just by his actions, I knew I was loved and cared for and that our Heavenly Father had us wrapped up in His arms. I always left feeling whole and loved and always wanted to pass that on to someone else that may have been hurting.
Inside chatter is sometimes all I can hear on certain days of my life and on these days I have to remind myself to hold every thought captive and to fall into the arms of Jesus. I have to also remind myself to be happy for other people in their joyous moments and to push all jealousy aside & that is pleasing in Gods eye as well as the fact that it just feels better overall. I’m thankful for God grace and mercy for all the times I’ve not been able to do this & thankful for his victories & blessing when I have! God is sooo good.
God has been dealing with me to work on the thoughts I think and the words I speak, because they are both so important. So this negative chatter fits in there perfectly for me. I’m glad we have a God who is so patient with us, and He loves to remind us of what our true identity is in Him when we forget! We know the negative chatter comes from the enemy, not from Him, and we don’t have to listen to it.
The inside chatter can be quite deafening at times…God’s word is the only voice that can cut through the chatter. God help me to hear only Your voice.
I’ve learned that no matter what the Enemy of God tells me or I tell myself –
The bottom line is… I am worth dying for!
Among other things, I have learned that inside chatter can be the devil’s way of getting in the back door so as to undermine one’s joy as well as identity in Christ. I’ve learned to pray and positively talk myself through the discouraging messages that might otherwise keep me from sharing the love of God.
Every week at Celebrate Recovery I introduce myself as a believer in Jesus Christ that has struggled with sexual abuse and drug addiction. But my identity is in Jesus Christ and I’m a new creation in Him. It’s good for me to be reminded of that often.
I am learning to recognize the chatter within and making attempts to replace it with the word of God…verses that confirm who I am in Christ! Not yet successful every time but getting better!! 🙂
I used to think that I was the only one who heard inside chatter, it’s a shame we allow it to cause such destruction. When it starts, I try to focus on what God thinks of me.
I’m still learning about my inside chatter. I’m a mother of four children (almost) 6, 4, 3 & 1. We are also recently new home schoolers. My husband believe very differently from many of the people we have been around all of our lives. It has made it very difficult recently as I feel like because we don’t do things the way the majority of those in our circles tend to do things we are now the outcasts. Therefore I have a lot of inside chatter about whether or not I’m liked etc. It’s hard. But I’m thankful for a wonderful friend many miles away that sent me the link to this webcast! I’m so excited to hear some encouragement & how I can battle the chatter!!! Bless you!!
I have struggled with “inside chatter” my whole life, but didn’t really think about it until reading Lysa’s message today. In school I was the last one chosen in our PE class, only an average student and heard many negative comments about how I looked, how I dressed, etc. So inside chatter tends to make me feel negatively about myself and once it starts, I end up beating myself up for not being a better mother, wife, employee, and the list goes on. But, I am who God made me and using His word to combat the negative inside chatter is crucial for me. I look forward to the webcast! Thanks Lysa I appreciate your insight!
Lysa – thank you so much for this post! I have been struggling all weekend with negative self-talk and then feeling sorry for myself for beating myself up so bad – and then more negative self-talk about feeling sorry for myself…just round and round….I love your posts and this is just what I needed to hear today. Thanks!
I recently read this blog by Lindsey Mead Russell in the Huffington Post, Ten Things I Want My Daughter To Know Before She Turns 10. Many of the items spoke to the fact that she is special and should know it and not let others tell her different. The one I liked the most was #8, It is almost never about you. I wish I would have learned this and believed it early on! It’s so true. It IS almost never about you. People make decisions and do things for a variety of reasons, but they are their reasons basesd on what is going on with them, not YOU! If I keep this in mind now, I am able to let things go easier. I do love the idea of this as well “I can’t put the whole of my identity into the smallness of this situation. Or any other for that matter.” I would add that to the list!
To read whole blog, go here http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lindsey-mead-russell/ten-things-ten-years-olds-should-know_b_1553134.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000003&ir=HuffPostBlog&utm_hp_ref=fb&src=sp&comm_ref=false
Inside chatter. Wow what a big topic or I think so. Inside chatter is so diverse. There are times the Lord can break through and help me overcome the lies I believe about myself or others. Others times old recordings can have what I call an automatic pilot and before I know it the recording is playing and I’m looking at some kind of false comfort to help me get through those times. Over the years some recordings no longer play and I am grateful for the victory the Lord has provided me. However there are still area’s that must by now have very deep imprints and I am looking to the Lord in my weakness to be strong. Thank goodness for imperfect progress.
Sometimes those negative thoughts enter our minds so quickly that we almost forget that the person who said them to us the first time has probably long forgotten the ugly words or deed, but we hang onto them like they are jewels we can never part with. I try to shut them down quickly by reminding myself that I am “fearfully & wonderfully made” and I want to dwell on that voice and those uplifting words instead.
It’s one of my worst enemies. I’m single and live alone which opens the door for a whole lot of inside chatter. It’s a very long, hard process but I’m learning to discern the lies of the enemy – not always, but some of the time and as you say that is progress!
I have always had a negative tape playing on repeat in my head. As I get older, I have started to be more deliberate in counter-acting that and trying to replace it with a positive one. Worship music in the car, on the computer, alone time with God, anything I can do to try and counter-act it I have tried. I am still a work in progress,
We all struggle with “inside chatter”. It is so easy to let it beat us down. I am learning that in Christ, I have all of the acceptance, approval, and liking that I need. It is okay to want acceptance, etc… from others, but we don’t need it because we already have it! Zephaniah 3:17 tells us that God delights in us and rejoices over us with singing. He quiets us with His love and yes, He is mighty to save us! And that, sweet sisters is enough!
I have allowed people’s perceptions and wrong choices ignite the inside chatter, of you are not enough, you are not wanted, you are not worth of being pursued, what is wrong with you? It takes time and and a concious determination to believe and receive what Christ says about me, as the absolute truth! But, it is possible, as we have been given Fullness in Christ, to embed that truth in us, day after day, one step at a time. Lisa, thanks for the honesty, the vulnerability and the courage to step out and walk the journey with us, simply being you! God bless you!
I have a hard time with the chatter. It tries to derail me and causes me to lose focus. It makes me doubt myself. It is in those times that I pray to God and lean on him to show me the answer and not listen to the noise.
I have to remind myself often that the negative chatter that I hear is not of God. Getting into his word and remembering how much he loves me helps redirect my thoughts. Lysa, thanks for sharing your experiences. I often relate and learn a valuable lesson.
Great message Lysa! I’m in my 40’s and finally feeling comfortable in my own skin and not letting the smallness of situations affect the whole of my identity. I’ve never been so confident in my life and I wish (as you do) that I could go back to my school-age self and show me that the little things are not important. I also wish I could help my pre-teen daughter see that too.
I’ve learned that negative chatter (also known as stinkin’ thinkin’) can only be silenced by replacing it with God’s truths. And it’s not something you outgrow, but it is something that God can help you overcome.
inside chatter can come back to bite you – long after you thought you had banished it. That’s why it’s so important to recognize it and remember who we are in Christ – that chatter is not from Him!
After reading the post and then the comments, I am relieved to know that I am not the only woman who has this negative chatter! I was starting to feel really alone and down on myself for always comparing myself and feeling less than adequate as a wife, mother, sister, daughter, and friend. When I start to feel this way, I realize I need to get on my knees in prayer and ask Him for his Spirit to guide my mind in the direction that He would have me go. Only He can give me what I need. Only He knows who I really am and what I can accomplish! What a strength that gives me! Thank you all for helping me remember this! God bless.
I’ve learned what matters is what God thinks of me and how much He loves us. He is who matters, pleasing Him, living for Him. As it was mention people shift, the Lord is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. Blessings to you, Lysa.
Have you been in a meeting that becomes unproductive and more destructive due to the conversations and comments? Rather than discussing positive solutions, we continue to wallow in negativity.
What you call the “Inside Chatter”, we call “The Committee”. When the thoughts start really bouncing around in there a simple mention of “The Committee” lightens my mood and opens my eyes to what I am doing. My sister has even given names to some of those voices in the committee LOL! Making light of this crazy brain makes the transition easier.
The key is to be the Chairman of this “Committee meeting” and redirect the conversation when you find it making that turn. Use some words from Christ to redirect to another angle or simply change the topic.
Another term we use is dilemmaling: Turning a simple decision into a dilemma, and then continuing to complicate it with more dilemmas.
Thank you Lysa for you true to life posts! Its always good to hear that I am not the only one!
Oh Lisa, I fight my inside chatter daily. Life has handed me many challenges. My husband is a chronic pain sufferer & has been unable to work for 4 years. He’s only 52 & he used to be so active it’s hard for both of us to adjust. My mother has alzheimers, she’s almost 86 & now, I’m trying to get her into a nice assisted living (it breaks my heart). Our income has been cut in half & I’m still paying off the same bills but, with 1/2 the money. One thing has gone up though, my weight, lol. I thank God every day that He never makes me go through all of this by myself. That He helps me see the positive, that He shows me so much love that I’m able to show that love to my wonderful family. I don’t know why we have to go through the things we do but He does & that’s all I need to know. So, I work daily to have the inside chatter be positive, encouraging & loving because God made me in His image, He chose me & every day I will remember that. Bless you & thank you for always encouraging all of us.
I learned that what people think of me or include me in do not define me. Regardless of whether they like me or include me I am loved by my heavenly father more than anyone on this earth could ever think of loving me. It is through the fullness of Christ that define who I am, and when those inner chatters that Satan puts in my head start I can put a stop to them by knowing this.
My husband struggles so much with the negative chatter. There are times that I do too. I always try to remind him (and myself) that we are worthy, valuable, and belong simply because of one thing . . . we are God’s creation and He loves us. That doesn’t completely remove the sting of hurt feelings when left out, etc but it sure does put things in a much, much better perspective. The Bible tells us Jesus was a human and it makes me wonder how He felt when people ignored him, talked about him, and did everything in their power to shame and destroy Him even to the point of death. If I think about what Jesus dealt with while on this earth, these situations really are small when it comes to our identity.
I have also learned through the years that the inside chatter is normally negative and i try not to let it bring me down. Usually i talk to besie and we pray for one another. Also, reading my devotions help!
Oh, how I resonate with not being a member of the “cool crowd.” All the “un” words apply:
Uncool
Uninvited
Unloved
I even fell into thinking that the disapproval was the measure of how lovable I was–or was not.
What I have learned about inside chatter is that I have a lot of old tapes… tapes that need to be erased… tapes that need to hear we’ve stepped into another century and they can’t be played on my iPod. They’re in the wrong format… and even more so because they don’t fit the truth Jesus etched into my heart when He crafted me–fearfully and wonderfully.
I need to sing the new song so loudly that I can’t even hear the mindless chatter.
I have found that I have to be very intentional about not going there because once the negative chatter about one part of my life starts I follow it all the way down and it influences every part of my thinking and my day!
inside chatter has and will always be there. As a young person it seemed to be so sad, destructive, hateful, lonely, left out….etc. And a lot of WHYS????? …Why did this or that happen to ME?? Why is life and people so unfair?? WHY ME??? There are times when these old feelings and chatter happen now, too. But as one grows older, matures, and we get “smarter”….the chatter seems to change….it is still there but now, as an adult it seems somewhat easier (most of the time) to deal with. My chatter seems to deal a lot with other people and what or how I feel about them…. I try VERY hard to remember that ONLY the LORD can judge another person, only the LORD really knows what is going on in someones life. Sometimes when the negative chatter gets too loud, I will say the Lords Prayer, or another meaningful Bible verse…and that usually at least SLOWS down that negative chatter…I have so much to learn and am looking forward to your broadcast.
It has occured to me that my “inside chatter” often starts without my awareness–like someone starting a conversation without me being ready to listen. Soon, the conversation in my head demands my attention. Sometimes it is positive and uplifting. Sometimes it is negative and depressing. At other times, it calls me to action. So, I listen. If it is encouraging, I embrace it. If is valid and demands a response, I give ear. If it is hindering my ability to function with joy and confidence, I pray God will clear my head and silence the chatter. As soon as he does. I hear Him speaking and there is peace.
Thank you Lysa for this reminder! We are never forgotten by our Redeemer!
Man, reading this reminds me of what happened yesterday. I found out I was left out of a big event. The news stung, hurt and I got angry. Than I remembered this is not the end of the world and this does not define my place in this world. Jesus has blessed me far beyond what I could have even dreamed for myself so for that I am truly blessed & thankful. As for the event, maybe there is a reason I’m not meant to be apart of it.
Negative chatter is just as hurtful for a 40 year old as it is for a teenager. It seems we never grow out of the “feeling left out” blues. It happened to a lady at work recently (although it was completely unintentional) and the hurt in her voice and on her face brought up recollections of my youth. My biological father abandoned me at 18 months (I’m 48 now and I never saw/heard from him again until 2 years ago when a brother found me on facebook. I ended up meeting “dad” and although I forgive him and we do have somewhat of a relationship now I will never forget the feelings of looking in the mirror and wondering why I wasn’t wanted. Satan sure knows how to whisper that “you’re not wanted” in your ear but God’s Word tells me different. Thank you Lord for “wanting” me and all the other hurting women in this world.
This is me a lot of my life. I thank you for inviting me to a free meeting. Would love to listen, but have college this night- may not be able to attend. However; this is very giving of you since I know I feel like this as well as others a lot of the time.
As I have grown in Christ these past 37 years so has The volume of His Spirit in mine. The chatter still makes it way in but is easily drowned out by the Greater one living in me, “greater is He that lives iin me, than he that lives in the world!” 1 John 4:4.
I can quench the fiery darts of the wicked one with my shield of faith! Eph 6:16
Thanks for today’s message, it is a good reminder to constantly listen to His voice!!
I have dealt with the feelings of unacceptance most my life. As I entered my 30’s started l started to accept myself as God made me and found joy in that. While creeping into my 40’s I rarely have those negative self talks even the negative voices from my past have been muted by God’s loving hand. The more I learn about God the more I appreciate myself and those around me.
I have learned that comparing my insides (feelings) and inside chatter to other people’s outside appearences is never a good plan!
This is my first time writing on a blog like this… Talk about nerve recking and negitive inside chatter going on inside me. What if people don’t like my post? And everyone knows the chain reaction. As a girl in school, I was pretty and did cheer, but I was always the odd ball. Always the last one to be thought about. I always said it was ok when I had tons of questions and concerns running in my mind. Now I am a little older, a wife, and I have realized my fullness is in Christ. I am who God says I am. To have a Christ like behavior and to give without expecting anything back because if we can do that we will receive far more Joy than sitting around waiting for someone to come to us. Looking forward to tomorrow! Everyone have a wonderful day!! 😀
Thank you for caring and giving to many of us who feel like this.
I am learning and relearning that I need to replace the negative chatter with God’s truth. Recognizing the negative chatter before it gets me down so I can replace it is still a challenge for me but with God’s help I am getting better.
I have learned specifically that if I let the negative inside chatter move from a controlled neutral place then the thoughts quickly spiral into a speed all their own. My negative chatter appears to provide that slight crack in my spiritual armor which Satan easily enters to erupt a fissure of negative emotions. I am quickly overwhelmed into “I am a bad person”, “not liked”, can’t get along with others”….. The negative chatter sounds so real doesn’t it? Even as an adult I work on this issue weekly. How I combat it to Say, I am a child of God. I go to Ephesians 6:11 about putting on the whole armor of God.
When really spinning from a negative chatter presence, I go to the contact page on my iphone about MY Positive Chatter: specific things, actions, items that are good about me, my abilities, what I have done, my children, my blessings. This easily accessible right in my face “who I am” moves me from a negative chatter spot to focus on what God has done in my Life and the direction He has me headed. Keeps things in perspective instead of the negative blah blah blah. Calms my mind, closes that crack in my Armor with God’s love and purpose.
I have learned to turn to God’s word everyday…not just when I begin to feel “blue” from the negative chatter. Staying in God’s word helps me to recognize sooner that the negative chatter is trying to get me down.
Inside chatter became ugly truth for me not realizing it wasn’t true at all. I have carried tons of it around my whole life. It’s hard to recognize these thoughts sometimes because they just become part of living, or more like living defeated. That’s not what God wants yet it’s difficult to make the switch…
Thank you for this post. This is something I still work on daily. Taking those “chatter” thoughts captive and getting rid of them!! I am my own worst enemy. I need to lean on God more. I surrender one minute all my chatter thoughts and take them right back the next. I am going to sign-up for the webcast right now! Thank you for the opportunity.
I feel like I have been there many times. I wish I had known Christ and my place with him then. Although when you are young it is hard no matter what you know.
I have learned that when I am feeling down or out of sorts I need to check my inside chatter. I don’t even know it is happening until I start to wonder why I am feeling the way I am. Then I start to hear it “you aren’t good enough”, “you can’t do that, you aren’t smart enough”, “that is silly to think you can do that”, and then I stop – get out my iphone and pull up YouVersion and read about what I am in Christ.
I just have to keep reminding myself that God loves me the way I am even if I don’t love myself. He NEVER changes and that gives me comfort when all my world does is keep changing.
My inside chatter reminds me negative weight loss and parenting chices that I should of made better. I do have an on going chatter with God but the moments of life in between don’t always express my true love for myself, my children or the gracefulness of life. I continue to try being the adult that God loves. Thanks for the encouragement on this life journey
What a combo, Sheila and Lysa. I have learned so much in WOF. The main thing I have learned is that I am complete in my SAVIOR. I have also learned that it does not matter what any one thinks of me but HIM. I am loved, forgiven, and saved for a life in eternity with HIM.
I have battled with inside chatter all my life I have delt with a ton of self-esteem and insecurity issues that could fill a dump. Satan is constantly feeding me lies and unfortunately sometimes I listen. Lately the battle has been the timing of us serving in the mission field. We are seeing so many friends leave and we are very excited for them but then Satan comes in and says “That should be you. Why does your husband have to go through all that schooling? You will never get there, your children will all be grown before you get there.” And on and on it goes. I have to dive back into the word and hold fast to the promises of God. I am right where I am suppose to be His timing is perfect there is a reason why we are where we are now and it will glorify HIm. I need to take my eyes off myself and keep them on HIm no matter what and be patient. That is so hard! The patient part!
I have struggled with negative chatter all my life. Usually it is about my abilities in my work. I will be tuned in tomorrow night because I desparately need to know how to fight it, how to ask God to speak to the negativity. I am still single but I want to gain strength over this so that, God willing, when I have children this isn’t a trait I pass on to my children.
I learned to combat negative inside chatter when I realized it’s not always kept inside and learned to keep my mouth shut, literally. A lot of times the negative comments are said out loud, under our breath, like “i was so stupid to do that,” or “how could I have been such an…” Etc. try it! It really is harder to complete these thoughts with your mouth closed! Makes become more aware of what youre actually thinking about yourself.
The chatter is horrid! It happens at such an early age too! My daughter is already dealing with it and I am attempting to quench it in my own life so that I might help her early on.
Instead of dealing with our own chatter I believe that many women unconsciously cause others to doubt themselves in order to make our own chatter diminish… if even for a short time.
I still deal with this as an adult.We were just left out of a wedding.We are the only family that didn’t get invited.I have to cast down those voices that want to creep in and I always say there is something God wants out of me from this situation and not take it personal.I have to walk in forgiveness.
One thing I have learned about Inside Chatter is that it is a MUST to fill my head with SOMETHING. And the beatiful things is that I get to choose what I fill my head with. I can allow my head to be filled with the negative junk or I can choose to fill my head with God’s truth. Junk vs. Truth. It seems like a no-brainer to me.
However, I often choose the junk on a whim…. and then I have to deal with the consequences. I am so thankful for your book, Lysa. It has really helped me so much in realizing what goes into my negative reactions. And negative chatter use to play a huge part. Thanking God for victory in this area!
Lysa,
Thank you once again for such inspirational words of wisdom. I have a 10yr.old daughter in 5th grade. This very issue of not being invited or made to feel unwanted by a group of girls is a real issue still today. I hope to be able to encourage her to feel whole and complete in the Lord. We have all been invited to be a part of his group of friends and family for eternity!!!!!
I am so terrified of failing professionally that my “inside chatter” is not sparked by others reactions to me, but myself. I have learned that even if I do fail to get an interview for a position that doesn’t effect my identity, as an individual or as a child of God
Sometimes my inside chatter is more about what I think of myself than what others think. I tend to believe that everyone must see my flaws as magnified as I do. I’m looking forward to the day when I learn to accept myself the way God does. Flaws and all.
Thank you for your post. It’s a great reminder about the inside chatter we all listen to, more than we should. I’ve lived with that negative voice all of my life. It wasn’t until I read, The Lies We Believe by Chris Thurman back in the 80’s that I came to realize, Satin is the only one who wants me to believe all that negativity. God loves me and thinks I’m special which is the truth I need to focus on, when those lies start creeping back into my thought processes.
Thank you again for your words of wisdom! 🙂
Blessings,
Melissa
Thanks for your post today. I have always struggled with low self esteem issues which make me afraid to put myself out there and try to be the best I can be. So afraid I just won’t come across as smart enough or worthy enough to give an opinion. I can’t wait for your webcast tomorrow night. I know God loves me just the way He made me.
I have learned that if the voice inside my head doesn’t line up with word and what it says about me that it is a lie. I have learned this but I don’t always practice this. The lies can be so subtle sometime that it is easy to fall into the trap of believing them.
February 20, 2012 my husband left to be with another woman; the inside chatter that followed was overwhelming. It included all of the things that could be wrong with me, everything that I didn’t do right, all of the things that he must have wanted to change about me, but what felt the worst was all of the inside chatter about what she was or what she had that I didn’t. The Holy Spirit was able to speak above the chatter though. First through a book called Intimate Issues by Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus. In the book they explain that God gave each of us the gift of free will, and even when we use that gift to make horrible decisions that are hurtful to others, to ourselves, and even to God he won’t take that gift away from us. The Holy Spirit comforted my heart with the fact that God didn’t overlook me, forget me, or do this to me; he simply refused to take his gift of free will away from my husband even though he was making a hurtful decision. God also spoke to me through Isaiah 54: 4-6
“Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame.
Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.
You will forget the shame of your youth
and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.
5 For your Maker is your husband—
the Lord Almighty is his name—
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
he is called the God of all the earth.
6 The Lord will call you back
as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—
a wife who married young,
only to be rejected,” says your God.
I was not alone, the One who made me still loved me and He saw beauty and a future in me. Slowly the inside chatter of how I wasn’t good enough began to quiet as the love of the Lord reminded me that I am His.
I constantly hear inside chatter and do struggle with it daily. I have been working on it for about a year and have finally come to the realization that what everyone else thinks of you makes no difference. Jesus loves me just as I am and I am beautiful inside and outside to him. Thank you for loving us so much Jesus.
I can’t honestly say I’ve gotten past the inside chatter to have learned (past tense) anything. What I am learning (present tense) is that inside chatter loves to happen when I’m at my weakest; whether physically, emotionally (mostly emotionally) or spiritually. I’ve read so many books on how to combat it, but when the rubber meets the road, I have not figured out how to silence it when I’m in the throes of it. In other words, I just haven’t been able to transfer it from head to heart. Maybe someday.
“Inside Chatter” causes me to feel very unhappy, unfocused and not someone who I want to be, what Ive learned that changing the way I feel about situations will also change your emotions toward it, you can choose negative or postive. It is a constant battle, but as you practive postivie self talk, the battle seems to come easier each time you do it. I am trying to love the way that God loves me, that means I need to love myself the way that God loves me : UNCONDITIONALLY. No matter what I do, mistakes and achievements, it is imparetive to love yourself unconditionally. That no matter what I do God will love me, and that means that no matter what I do I need to love me. Thank you for sharing this story! It was very inspiringing and valuable
I have learned that inside chatter is the devil. He is wanting to bring us down and down we go. Inside chatters tells us we are fat, have no friends, puts us in the comparison mode and we always come up short, and before we know it, we have spiraled ourselves into depression. I have done this and I remember that I am unique, God made me with special talents that are to be used to glorify him. I am unique. I am looking forward to the webinar to reinforce the inside chatter is damaging.
I am writing to you, Lysa, because I need to learn more about fighting the negative chatter that goes on in my head on a daily basis. I deal with constant guilt and condemnation, feeling like everything is all my fault. I need God more than I ever have right now. Can you please help me?
Aleithia Foster
I too have felt the sting of rejection and still often hear the lies of the enemy telling me, you’re not worthy, no one likes you, etc.
As I’ve gotten older I can recognize the lies easier and turn to The Lord and His TRUTH about who I am in Christ. It’s been a long road and just yesterday I found some of those old familiar thoughts springing up. Thank you for this timely post! I will be tuning in!
Looking forward to the web cast!!
I don’t know about the rest of you, but I have some inside chatter that likes to SCREAM at me, and sometimes that is worse than the inside chatter that just whispers quietly. But sometimes it’s not either. Sometimes the whispering chatter is even more evil. The squeaky wheel gets the oil, but sometimes those whispers can make you just stop turning to where you don’t even NEED the oil.
This chatter is something I still struggle with and it breaks my heart to see how much my teenage daughter struggles too. I pray that the promise of who I am in Christ can be louder than the chatter in my mind and I can show my girl how loved she is by me and more importantly, God.
I often hear inside chatter – fearful/anxious thoughts always seem to be running through my mind. What seems to help me is by saying, “God, this is in YOUR hands”. It seems that as soon as I say that, I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders!
I can completely relate with this post. I first dealt with rejection at a very young age & throughout my adolescent & teen years. I’ve been learning over the last five years that the only One who truly matters has always accepted me & loved me & He always will. People will disappoint & hurt us throughout life but we can’t find our worth in them & whether or not we are accepted or rejected by them. My worth, my true identity is in Christ. I need to tell that negative chatter the truth when it tries to tell me lies. I hang onto & meditate on scripture that reminds me who I am in Christ, I am who He says I am!
Sometimes inside chatter may be very real and very true. The inside chatter may be what is really happening, may be our actual situation at the moment, and we talk ourselves into believing this chatter to be truths about us, about our character. What we fail to realize is that this situation is JUST for this moment. How we choose to reflect on it, how we choose to “talk” to ourselves about it (inside chatter) all depends on who we want to listen to.. Do we listen to God? or do we listen to the enemy or our situation? God tells us we are HIS! And as His children we are victorious over any and every situation life throws at us. This moment will pass, this situation will resolve one way or another and be in the past for us to learn from and grow from, not define us for the remainder of our lives. Instead of listening to our inside chatter, we need to listen to God’s “chatter” by standing on His Promises and listening to His Spirit telling us the Truth through God’s Word.
I’ve learned that the enemy will bring it up to you whenever you start something new for God. I’ve also learned that if God led me to it, then HE will give me all that I need to do it 🙂 God’s word gives me so much to replace the chatter with truth.
Hi everyone! The general topic of friends is one I am exploring on my blog. The self-doubt, worry, envy, etc that comes along with friendships is a tough one. But, what I am trying to focus more on is what God things of me. And less of what others think.
It is almost constant lately (esp. when things go wrong) and it seems to be on autopilot. Takes a lot of prayer and effort to beat it down
This resonates so much with so many of us. Especially with Facebook and social media….you see others ‘doing’ things together, posting their pics and you think ‘why wasn’t I invited’, etc…It can mess with your head. And if you are not grounded in the Lord, it can make you feel unloved. I’ve been listening to that chatter too long and its time I listen to the One who created me and loves me whether I’m invited or not.
Satan does love isolation. US in isolation, that is. Because it allows him to sneak in silently and whisper lies to us. Those that say, ‘we aren’t worthy’, ‘we aren’t loved’, ‘we aren’t worth much to anyone’….and it’s SO not true!!
SO….when we feel isolated, we need to bring God in first. He will overcome. He will fill those voids that circumstances sometimes drill into our hearts. Not easy! But a MUST!
We need to become confident in our God and with that we gain confidence in ourselves and we can choose to wear that instead of Satan’s lies as we walk through this crazy world.
Unfortunately, the negative thoughts have taken over me. I feel like a failure in all of my relationships. I isolate myself from others, thinking they don’t want to associate with me anymore. I don’t participate anymore and only do what I need to do for my son’s sake. Just living one day at a time … going through the motions. I pretend things are okay, but I hurt so much inside. Your daily devotions keep me going, and I thank you for that. – Kristi
It’s been more years than I care to count since I changed high schools four times due to my dad’s job. Needless to say, I wasn’t included in a ton of stuff since no one knew me! But all these years later,every time I get left out of a gathering…especially a girlfriend get-together, my inside chatter shouts at me about my “unworthiness .” I praise God that because of Jesus I am not unworthy. I just need some positive self-talk to get through the hurt.
Lysa, I’ve been praying for your hearing…12 years ago I woke up totally deaf in one ear, and also deal with tinnitus. Hang in there,sister.
I just found this website! I had been working for a Christian man who owned his own company, and he asked me to help him. I jumped at the chance, it was a part-time job, I had quit teaching to concentrate more on my family, time was slipping away and I wanted to be more of a Mom. This boss paid me well, I was home when my kids got home, everything seemed great, until this boss sold company, and treated me like I was a no one. I forgot to mention, this man was a very good friend of our famines. We would go out to dinner as couples, do things together, we were friends! Everyone in company got something. Except me! I was crushed, angry at God, so hurt words couldn’t describe. My husband was amazing, he said be happy for them, be happy we will be fine. I felt betrayed and hurt by a Christian man who couldn’t be honest with me sorry for venting but Lysa thank you so much for this website. God is so good and heaves even me!
Guess I haven’t learned much about negative chatter since it still controls me. I need to learn to the chatter is not always true and learn to believe in myself and focus on God.
“Inside Chatter” is a battle in my life for sure. I was never really “in” the group in school. I had a group of close friends but none of us were “in” that group. Your pink shirt story hit home with me. There is a lot of pain inside from those kinds of situations. The inside chatter is what keeps me from getting a Facebook page. The inside chatter kept me from attending my 20 year class reunion. The pain of the past was just too much to deal with….20 years later. Good grief….Really???….’em…yes.
Looking forward to the webcast.
My inside chatter always tells me I am not worthy or respected enough to do the task at hand and I will never conquer the mountain!
“Inside chatter”, to me, equals satan’s lies.
I have OCD and satan’s lies have tried to make me doubt my character and who I am as a person for years (to the point of having disabling self-doubt). A few quotes that I have jotted down are:
1) “we listen to the lies of satan… … … when we need to let the truth of God’s word break through the lies.” – a friend of mine who is a youth pastor
2) “We’re going to have to let truth scream louder to our souls than the lies that have infected us.” – Beth Moore
3) “We can’t recognize lies if we don’t know truth.” – Beth Moore
My faith has been huge to me, as it is to everyone reading this, I’m sure. I’ve realized it’s important to know who I am in Christ and, as Beth Moore has put it: “I am who God says I am.”
Cari
One thing I’ve learned in my walk with Jesus is that everything happens with a purpose. As I began to recognize the ‘negative chatter’ came from Satan, my question was “Why is he doing this”? I understand now that the enemy’s purpose is to distract me from hearing the voice of God. The enemy also intends to choke the life out of the Word God’s already put in me. If Satan can keep me distracted and block my hearing, I am not productive in God’s kingdom. So when I recognize the chatter, I try to immediately speak against the thoughts and push further to see what it is that so important to God that Satan is trying to keep me from hearing it. Hearing the chatter causes me to forces me dig deeper into Christ.
I struggled with inside chatter growing up because of my mom’s drug and alcohol abuse. I was teased mercilessly and everyday I would wonder what people were saying about me, my mom. Even now that I’m older, as a mom and wife, I still battle the chatter from time to time. One issue I had to overcome was whether or not my hubby’s best friend wife even liked me. I tried to include her in outings, invited them over, tried to schedule other events and each time she would reply that they were busy doing other things. At first I told myself that she didn’t like me but as time passed, I’ve just come to accept the fact that maybe she and I may not be close as my hubby and best friend are and that’s ok with me. But I’m always open and willing if/when she does come around.
I have learned a lot about my inside chatter over the last 10 years or more, and that the inside chatter of negative stuff heard in my head is so much satan. It took me tell i was 35 to learn by reading a Dr Phil book that you become what you tell yourself. If you tell yourself your worthless, or can’t run a mile, or could never be a bicyclist that can ride many miles a day cause you are not built for it, then that is what you become, Someone you can’t. But when you tell yourself I can run a mile without stopping, maybe not today, but over time of baby steps, you will be amazed at what you can accomplish. My goal now is teaching my children you can do anything, it just takes baby steps and time. You have to make inside chatter positive!!
I have faced the same thing, not been invited to a birthday party, I had all those same feelings. God has taught me, over the years, to base who I am on how he sees me and on what his word says about me as his child. He loves me, he has forgiven me, he is my helper and my strength. I am a child of the King….that is a miracle in its self. Yet, sometimes I get caught off guard and find myself listening to the “inside chatter” all the doubts come in like a storm. Telling me, you are no good, no one likes you, you aren’t as good of a friend as the others are. I have learned to keep God’s promises wrote down in a little book and read them often and stand firm on what he says. God says to think on the good things not the things of the world. Also in Proverbs 3: 5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Satan wants to get me down and he will use my friends and family to make me feel helpless and lonely. If he can get me feeling sorry for myself I won’t be a threat to him. God can’t use me when I am consumed with doubt and anger. I need to pray and ask God to show me his truth in his word and be encouraged by it. I need to forgive the one who hurt me, that person isn’t perfect, and I’m not either. I need to pray for them and leave it to God. I can’t wait to hear your message for tomorrow night.
Someone wisely told me to ask myself if Jesus would say the same thing to His chosen. So when self-talk included “way to go, stupid” I would say a prayer asking for forgiveness for talking to His child in such a way.
Lisa, I don’t know how you always capture exactly what I have felt at least once in my life, but you do. As a child, teen, and adult. This past year has been one of the hardest ever, as I struggled to survive the betrayal of my best friend of 10 years. I could have never anticipated the full impact and devastation that my negative inside chatter would have on my life. I let the chatter isolate me, take me out of any involvement with ministry at my church, convince myself that I was totally alone and abandoned, and unworthy. Through much crying out to God, confessing my feelings, confronting my hurt, and through reading your book, Unglued, I have slowly been able to forgive, and stop the negative chatter before it becomes negative screaming! I have reminded myself already this morning not to give the enemy one inch of mind- turf!
I have learned that God doesn’t speak to us through incessant, negative chatter. He breathes life into us through people who are willing and capable of speaking life into us. The chatter is constant and never uplifting and it is perpetrated by the deceiver. We must surround ourselves with those who will lift us up, and we must remember that as children of the most high King we have the authority to put the deceiver in his place beneath our feet.
Thanks for the post Lysa! We all have a story like this I’m certain. It has taken me a long time, but this is what I say out loud when negative chatty- chat starts . . . “That was then, this is now. That was then, this is now.” I keep saying it until I get it and then I move on!!!
So excited for this. My word for 2013 is discipline… and disciplining myself to turn to God’s word – replace my negative thoughts with the GOOD thoughts He has towards me, of me, etc. So excited for this webcast!
Great advice for my teenage girls! Thank you.
I have learned or rather learning not to believe everything I think. So often I have made my thoughts my reality when that is just not truth. So by really taking my thoughts and saying to myself is this true or is this a lie I have helped overcome some deep hurts that I have brought on myself. I do still struggle with this and there are days that I fail but thankfully God isn’t done with me yet 😉
I deal with inside chatter more now then U ever did as a young girl. A lot of it has to do with past mistakes, things I regret and who I am in Christ. I have found the chatter with scripture, prayer and praise works to get my thoughts on the right track. Colossians 3:2 and Philippians 4:8 are a couple I often call to mind. I go through the list in Phil. 4:8 and ask myself if what I’m thinking are those things. I also find that sometimes I need to process and get to the root of the chatter which usually isn’t fun, but is always freeing in the end… to make sense of who you are.
I meant to say I in that first sentence.:)
And “I have found that combatting…” in the second sentence! This is what I get for typing this on my phone! Lol!!
Thank you for your words and for this great opportunity to better ourselves! I didn’t have any one specific incident in my life that sticks out, but there is always the battle within of “what did that person mean by that comment? Am I not good enough? What do they think of me?” etc. Those whispers are always there. I used to be in the corporate world and climbing the ladder and 4 yrs. ago I made the switch to work at our church with children. I still get comments on why would I go for less pay and why not stick with corporate…it’s more powerful, etc. And I too, have self doubts on is this enough for me, etc. In my position, I’m able to chat with 20-25 staff women who struggle with this exact same thing and they have backgrounds that are tougher than mine. I’d love to be able to share these books with me and help them on their personal/spiritual journey!! I believe I’m in this position for a reason…God’s reasons!
Well over the years, I have learned (and still am learning) that the inside chatter – those inside voices that are screaming at me to get my attention – telling me all the things that I am not, tend to go away when I don’t focus on them and instead focus on that sweet small voice that tells me I am good enough, I am loved, redeemed, the righteousness of Christ, fearfully and wonderfully made, and so much more I don’t have to give that chatter a listening audience. Lysa, thanks for all you do and will continue to do!
This post was just what I needed today! My internal chatter over perceived rejection can be so defeating sometimes. I am trying to replace it with God’s Word — specific verses or even just praising God over and over. And, of course, praying for God’s help. His help doesn’t come suddenly in the form of a feeling of self-confidence or laughter. But, after several minutes, I do realize that my mind has shifted and I don’t feel so bad anymore.
However, I have to be willing to give up the negative chatter. Thank you for one more weapon to fight the lies!
I have struggled with “inside chatter” all of my life and continue to do so. I have a teenage daughter who struggles with it as well. I have prayed about it and also remind myself on a daily basis that the negative thoughts are not true and that I am not necessarily the cause of every perceived hurtful things that others do, but it is a constant struggle. I even try to convince myself not to care, but deep down I just do. I know my daughter is the same way. I look forward to your podcast and will have her watch it with me.
Just this morning I was dealing with negative thoughts and going down a thought path I didn’t need to go down. The key is remembering I don’t have to do this. God wants me to renew my mind with His word & I can & did change these thoughts by meditating on who I am in Him. Thank you Lysa for this timely post!
Our granddaughter is going through very much of the same kind of pain. She is very quite and introverted, but desperately wants SOME friends. We encourage her to be willing to go up to other and make small talk, ask them about their church, etc., but she still struggles. Her school years have been plagued with loneliness. I’m forwarding this blog to her to read. Maybe she can see that others feel the same way and there is hope in GOD!
I cant say I have conquered it yet…by sheer chance (God?) I had checked out Unglued from the library and had it bedside when my life group from church of 9 years decided I asked too many questions (I wondered why a dear friend was being excluded after being in the group before) and pretty much asked me to leave…..every Monday nite…9 years 🙁 this just happened 7 weeks ago…I clung to that book before I had to return it and have told all kinds of women about it 🙂 I am trying to get back to church where I only know these women and I have to say the chatter in my head is non-stop…(even at 62 yrs old~!) we never stop learning…I love your blog…read it daily…love your books…praying that He leads me to a new life/group/peace this year.
blessings to you my friend~ xo
Oh my, how I needed to hear this today. It took me back to so many times in my past when I have been left out, made fun of and bullied. Fortunately, as a woman I have found that my identity is in Christ, not what others think of me. But, I still battle with self doubt and insecurity. As a mother, as a wife, as a daughter, as a sister…there are so many things that happen in a day that can trip me up and make me doubt my worthiness. I feel as if I have to be perfect all the time or I’m just no good. That is when I have to fill my head with good thoughts and God’s word so that I don’t listen to Satans lies. It’s a battle.
I have struggled with negative inside chatter my whole life. I was mercilessly teased in elementary school for being a very emotional child, and that has stuck with me my WHOLE life. To this day, I don’t deal well with clique-y situations or situations where there’s a lot of gossip and behind-the-back talking going on; my inside chatter kicks in, and makes me struggle to get past feeling inadequate and inconsequential. Praise God for calling me beloved, though–I can take comfort in knowing that like you said, these are the SMALL moments. These are not identity-defining, these are not all-encompassing, these are not the be-all, end-all of who I am. Sometimes it’s still hard to remember, but I’m getting better at recognizing that negative self-talk and nipping it in the bud!
Actually, this hit home perfectly for my daughter today. She came home from school this morning because the spring musical cast list went up and she wasn’t on it! She adores music and musicals, and it was her fondest desire to be a part of this year’s musical. I didn’t know how to console her. I hope this will help her get through this. Thank you!!
I needed this today! Thank you so much!! Wouldn’t it be nice if people would think of others feelings before they do something like that. Sad thing is it doesn’t end when you become an adult.
I have finally learned whose voice the inside chatter really is. I have struggled pretty significantly because of this. I have struggled with many self esteem issues, and it has horribly affected my relationships with others, especially my spouse. I struggled to have friends because I was so afraid of what others thought of me. I allowed my husband to abuse me because I thought I wasn’t good enough, and I was afraid of being alone. I am thankful today to be able to say that because of God’s unconditional love and passion for me, I now that I am a princess….daughter of the one that matters the most. My priorities have shifted first to him, then everyone/everything else. Keeping my eyes fixed on Him is the most important thing I must do each day to keep the inside chatter in check!
Inside Chatter. What mean words. I’m thankful for my age that those mean words do not have as much of an effect on me as they use to when I was a teenager. However, even with my “church ladies” that I hang with…when I see that I wasn’t included in an event it kind of hurts your feelings. So, I am right back where I use to be. Looking forward to your webcast Lysa. 🙂
Hhmmm…..still a work in progress for me I guess! I am being forced to address it though as our oldest child seems to find negative ‘internal chatter’ a challenge too. I too thank you for this post today….just what I needed to hear from God! I don’t want to trudge wearliy through another day.
As a Pastor’s wife I have a lot of inside chatter that I have to tune out. It feels like people are always watching you and your family and how you do things, and if you mess up it’s a big deal for you and those watching you. I have found that being in God’s word at least a couple times a day, listening to Christian music, and prayer really make a difference in the thoughts that come and go throughout the day. The negatives come less frequently and I find I am able to combat them easier. It’s still not easy, but I know that God made me the way I am because He wants me to be who I am in Him, and as long as I focus on being who He made me to be, I know I’m moving in the right direction and can have confidence in Him. I have also found that the better we feel about ourselves on the inside, the better we look on the outside! If we are dreary and let down inside, that’s what will show on the outside as well! If we want to be beautiful on the outside, we have to be beautiful on the inside, and that comes from the love that He gives us and our accepting of that love! I am thankful for Him and that I can rest in knowing I am His, and that’s what really matters!
Inside chatter has been a lifelong battle for me. I have learned over the years that I need to take those thoughts captive, pause, think about what the real issue is behind that thought, and say a quick prayer. I still struggle but I’m making imperfect progress!
I know everything you’ve said about that “inside chatter” – – but even when I pray and beseech God to help me – – it’s still there. There is no one in my life that I can talk to. My husband scolds me when I try to share my sadness. I have always moved around a lot – – changing communities. The 2 times when we stayed for awhile, all the women close to me moved away. Even attending church and women’s Bible study is empty – – I see those people when I attend these functions, but there is no relationship. I’m looking for a church with deep, heart-felt worship. There aren’t any here and no one seems to know what I’m talking about. I made a heart-to-heart connection last spring – – but after 5 months, she moved away. I’m left alone – – with the voices. I look confident and “together” – – the woundedness of my heart doesn’t show on the outside. I’ve been a good friend – – but I can’t find one.
Wow, never though of it this way. Putting my whole identity into the “smallness of the situation”. Sounds silly now, but been battling the neg inside “don’t measure up, not liked, or not picked” condemnation my whole life. Really silly (if it didn’t hurt) in light of the fullness I have in Christ. How awesome! I need to swim in that more today. Thank you, Lysa.
I have four granddaughters and they are all twelve years old right now. I remember feeling “not chosen” growing up and my prayer and heart’s desire is for them to see themselves through God’s eyes not through the “smallness” of events that will inevitably happen.
Inside Chatter stinks.
Ahhh, inside chatter! It can be quite debilitating. I cannot tell you how many times I hear my dad and brother’s mean teasing about my thighs and butt, my weight loss attempts, and my attempts as a 12 year old preteen to apply makeup and style my hair. They were very mean comments. It took me years to get over many of those comments – to shut them down in my mind – long after the comments stopped because I moved away. Sometimes I still have to “cast down every negative thought” when my dad’s voice creeps back into my head. I am thankful that the Lord and some great mentors have taught me how to combat those thoughts with the word and truth. I am also careful with my own words to my daughters when they were growing up. Knowing how much pain my parents caused me, helped me to work very hard not to repeat the same mistakes. I wasn’t perfect – I know I made mistakes – but I think for the most part, I didn’t repeat many of the mistakes my parents made.
Another thing I have learned is that the comments my father and brother made, were not an excuse for me to give up, apply blame, or stay stuck in an unhealthy situation. Like Lysa said, the situatin cannot define me. At some point in our life, we have to realize that only we can control our mind an only we can give power to another person’s negativity. So I choose not to give power to their words.
My inside chatter for many years said I was a failure. I could not accomplish anything, yet when you look at where I was in life I had accomplished so much my material and outside standards. Yet I felt so very empty. I have come to realize that my significance comes from God’s choice to create me. I am insignificant compared to God, but so very significant to him.
I recently went through a horrible divorce after my husband had an affair with a much younger woman and decided he didn’t want to work on our 10 year marriage. I had 3 kids in 22 months (1 + twins), a full time outside the home job and a father dying of lung cancer. I suppose my husband was not top on my list during this time very difficult & demanding time. Although I know that what he did was wrong, I struggle daily with the inside chatter saying “I should’ve, would’ve, could’ve. Would things be different if I had been a different wife? Looking forward to the webcast!
Thank you for your post today. Reading your words stung a little, remembering how many times I was left out of activities. Never did feel like I was good enough to be around the “cool” people. I built my identity on how I thought others viewed me! Working on getting rid of the negative chatter!
Great post Lysa. I have to confess that I have a PhD on inside negative chatter. For a large majority of my life I did put the whole of my identity into the smallness of the given situation. It would break my heart and leaving me feeling so rejected, hurt and empty inside. I still struggle today with inside chatter but I do not allow it to be all consuming of me and I often have to remind myself that it is Christ in me and that my identity is found in Him. Not only is my identity in Christ I need to also remember to be free to by the real me and not what others think I should be. I also have to remind myself that I need to step back and view a situation through the eyes of others. They have a reason for why they have done what they have in a given situation. It could be they are hurting for whatever reason, feeling rejected or just really didn’t think something was as big a deal as I do. I have to remember there is a reason for everything and that maybe God didn’t want me to be in a certain situation and that was His way of protecting me from something far greater than the small pain I am feeling from a hurt or rejection.
“Inside chatter” gets in the way of us benefitting the glorious forgiveness of the Lord. Take for example, when we have sinned, one that weighs heavy on our heart, we are blessed to be able to go to God in prayer and repent and ask forgiveness and strive not to repeat. Ta-Da He forgives us and continues to love us. But then that inside chatter pops up now and then and we need to give it a thump right back in our forgiven pile.
How great is our Lord!!!
I have struggled all my life with inside chatter, but have found God is the source to go to in order to turn it off and to make the wrong thoughts turn to His reality and what He says about me. Listening to satan’s lies only makes our self-worth and identity shift with what the culture says about us. Focusing on our Heavenly Father keeps us grounded in our true identity. Just last night our 22 year old son came to us indicating that he has been struggling with depression and fighting with spiritual oppression with his identity. With much prayer from grounded prayer warrior friends, He is finding God’s peace again and not stuffing these feelings. He knows God’s truth about Him. What a praise. It is so important that we learn to look to God, praying without ceasing, our one and only true source of Life and Light to get through this chaotic world, to guard our minds and take captive our thoughts and to reach out to our family and friends when we see them struggle.
Sweet Blessings for your awesome ministry, Lysa.
It is so hard to feel left out. For many years, I’ve struggled with that and honestly, have avoided deep friendships for fear of feeling that again! The inside chatter is always an issue. The only thing I can do to counteract it is pray and read God’s word – the truth! Thanks for this giveaway!
I find that Satan’s lies come most often when a ministry opportunity comes along. All of a sudden, thoughts like “You can’t do that! You are not capable of that – who are you kidding?” fill my mind. When these thoughts (lies) come along I have found the best way to face them is to tell Satan to shut up and leave. I then ask the Holy Spirit to speak to me loudly – as His voice is the one I want to hear and am listening for.
It’s funny…I’m 50 and had this very thing happen last week. I have started a job at a new company. I’m have a lifetime of experience in my field and I’m very good at what I do. However, I’ve had a hard time breaking into the social circle at my organization. In the past, having been the center of the circle socially, it’s been hard on my heart and led to a lot of negative self talk. Because God is with me and part of my every day I rest in Him and not take this as the fact that I’m not measuring up. This was a great blog post. and timely..thanks Lysa!
I’ve been working in the recovery ministry at my church for about 2 years now and this is an issue that we discuss fairly often. I am no where near an expert on the subject but I have learned quite a bit from my girls lives and from my own experiences as well. I’ve learned that we all have a “committee” in our heads, voices that speak in a certain persons place. Ex: Mother, brother,friend, enemy, high school coach, ex boyfriend, etc. And when situations arise we hear a comment come from one or more of these people. I also know that our voice is the loudest out of any in our head and ultimately is the one we will always follow.
So now the question I ask myself is this: Do I agree or disagree with the positive/ negative comments? And, How can I change my “stinkin thinkin” around to a Godly p.o.v.? It’s simple, line it up with the Word. Learn what God thinks about me and all the rest is empty chatter. I have found tremendous healing from simply knowing He created me for a purpose.
I am starting to realize that the mean things I say to myself are far worse than anything any one else could say, because I know EXACTLY where I’m vulnerable! Direct hit every time!
We can control the ‘inside chatter’ and seeking God to help us with that will make us more successful. Thanks for the chance at the giveaway. God bless.
Inside chatter stinks! But what I am learning is to recognize it quicker and change my thinking!
Reading these words this morning as I struggle to get “Monday” started really made me stop and think – I listen to the inside chatter WAY too much. And not only do I listen, I let it affect my feelings of value and worth. To set the seen – I am 3 1/2 months pregnant (so prego-hormones on full alert!), have 3 other kids (8, 3, 1), and am a full-time high school teacher. So needless to say things are a tad busy…..or crazy, whichever word you prefer. My husband is very helpful, which I don’t always give him credit for, but let’s face it, he is still a guy and a lot of things that need to be done don’t even register on his “man radar”. In the middle of the craziness, when everyone is asking me for something, and my husband is being more of a “man” than I would like him to be at that moment – this is when the inside chatter starts going.
“You can’t handle this”
“This life you have is crazy – you can’t keep it all together”
“No one cares what YOU need. Everyone only cares about themselves and what YOU can do for THEM. You don’t’ matter”
It’s this last one that resonates the most. I am so busy taking care of everyone and everything – who takes care of me? Who cares what I need, or that I am about to have a mental breakdown most days? If I listen to the inside chatter – the answer that I am given is Nobody.
This ‘lie’ is exactly what Satan wants me to believe. That nobody cares about me. I have learned to recognize this, though, for what it is a big ol’ fat lie.
The Creator who made me – made me for a purpose, and loves me all the time, especially in the middle of the craziness. And, knowing that he sees me and is there to help me, gives me the peace I need to ignore the lie of the inside chatter and not let it define me. I am defined by the God who made me and gave me the life that I have and he ALWAYS cares about me – even when I have peanut butter in my hair, 3 screaming kids, and a husband who is asking what we are gonna have for dinner.
In my life, very rarely does inside chatter cultivate the truths in my life. Rather it fosters half-truths, falsehoods, self doubt, pessimism. Working on rewriting my inner dialogues!!
I have struggle with inside chatter most of my life. I had a hard time in school making friends due to having a birthmark on my face. I use to always tell myself that no one liked me because of this. I have learned since Ive grown that my birthmark is a distinct mark of myself. I tell my boys this is were God kissed me while I was in the process of being made. I struggle as an adult with this because I chose to live differently than most of the people who are around us. I know God has a purpose and plan for my family and if it means sitting in silence by myself day by day then this is what I will do! Because He says “Be still and Know that I am God”
Looking forward to the webcast. I need to remind myself who the enemy is when inside chatter starts to scream condeming thoughts. The bible tells me I am not ignorant of his schemes. I know how he works and where the battlefield is. It is so much easier said than done. I struggle not daily but more like hourly to keep my thoughts on God’s promises and truth. I am learning to trust God especially when my circumstances look the same or worse. Thank you Lysa for teaching us and listening to God’s whispering voice in your life. You are such a blessing to many.
I learned that I just can’t let my inside chatter get the best of me. It takes up too much of my time and effort!
I have dealt with negative inside chatter since becoming a teenager. I don’t know what made it begin. I’m not sure there was one defining moment but I think it was just the continuous let-downs and put-downs that occur in middle school and high school. Always feeling like the outsider, wishing to be included. Those thoughts still haunt me today at 45….if my husband points out a negative characteristic that I have or a talent that I do NOT have…here they go again. I hear the same old “your not good enough” voices. Over the past year, I have been trying something new to work on this. When the negative chatter starts, I say to myself “YOU ARE A CHILD OF GOD”….. “HE MADE YOU PERFECT IN HIS SIGHT TO ACCOMPLISH HIS PLAN FOR YOU”….it doesn’t make it completely go away but it has gotten better.
Kim
I have a certain person in my life that always seems to cause this “inside chatter”. I find as adult women the chatter is more often and worse than when I was a teenager. However right at the end of 2012 our Pastor spoke about starting a new fresh year and said “Stop the insanity”. From that point on I do not allow or stop the chatter before it starts.
what I’ve learned about “Inside Chatter” in my life: that it is not helpful or constructive in any way, shape or form, that it’s often emotion-based & therefore would not hold up in court & should be thrown out of my mind…and then I pray that God will help me to remember who I am in His eyes & help me to become who He longs for me to be.
I have fought the ‘inner-thought’ life a long time. I have always heard to ‘take captive the thoughts’ but I have not been able to really get a grasp on it. Sometimes I say things to myself so much, that it is hard to ‘reprogram’ my brain to know they are not true.
Working to fill my thoughts and life with positive thoughts- God’s word- and to be able to quickly change my emotions and not allow them to control me or my thoughts. Thank you for your insights on making “imperfect progress”. Love it!
Inside chatter is something I have battled with since childhood. I was always the one left out for parties or at recess. I have dealt with the feelings of I am not wanted or good enough. These thoughts are a daily struggle for me. I know it is Satan trying to get in my head and lead me away, but sometimes I just listen and isolate myself from everyone!
God’s timing is amazing!! I am 56 years old and currently working with someone to understand what in my past has led me to have such negative thoughts about myself when I know deep down I am created in His image and He has saved me!! I am so thankful to you for sharing this webcast with all who feel as worthless and alone as I do. Thank you.
The inside chatter is a constant struggle! I sometimes hear the hurtful things that people said about me 30 yrs ago and it still hurts. Need to let go and forgive. Looking forward to the webcast.
I’m learning…to keep my eyes & ears on Jesus…HIS TRUTH sets me free from the fear & lack of peace that comes with the untruths told to by me to me.
I have the worst internal chatter. It is a constant daily battle of my mind and I am always working hard to change it. To remember God’s promises. To repeat scripture and BELIEVE it. I still struggle with not being picked or included, whether it’s at church or online with the Christian bloggers. It’s tough to put your heart out there…
“Inside chatter” to me equals satan’s lies also…Replace it with God’s word.. its how I mute the chatter.
Ugh…. I have too much inside chatter going on!! And I feel like I let it have reign over my emotions far more than I would like to admit. 🙁 THanks for this post and the reminder that I need to rely on God’s Word and how God sees me over the chatter in my head.
Great article. I’ve struggled over the years with this myself, and have to often remind myself to ignore the negative chatter. I’m now trying to teach my ten year old daughter about this too, because she also struggles. She mishears comments many people make and replaces what they said with the chatter in her brain. A teacher might give her constructive criticism, and she hears that she is stupid. It’s a hard cycle to break. I remind her that’s not what the teacher said. It’s what the negative talk in her mind hears but it’s not truth.
First off, I have a HUGE problem with the inside chatter. But God is showing me WHO I am in Him. not what the world says, not what the enemy says, not the temporary rejection of a friend who is busy, but strictly what He says about me. I go back to that truth every time the lies start coming. Theres a song that helps that, by Sandi Patty, called You Call Me Yours. The chorus says “You call me beautiful, you call me righteous, you call me worthy of your Sons own precious blood. You call me Holy, you call me strong at my weakest, forgiven and pure, you call me Yours.” And thats the truth I hold tight to. My friend and I have adopted a saying to hold us accountable: STAND FIRM! stand firm against the enemy, confident the Lord fights for us, owns us, loves us, and we are precious to Him. And if I am precious to Him, no one elses opinion matters! People didnt die for me – Christ did!
Awesome truth!
will look up that song now. Thanks for posting, Becky, it was very encouraging 🙂
I have learned that the chatter in my head is easy to believe, but most of it is not true. I have to replace it with the right thoughts and with God’s Word. I’m comforted to know that I am not alone in this struggle!
Lysa, sometimes I would swear you’re reading my diary! I could’ve written this post! Wow!!
I have learned that inside chatter is often from the enemy. He whispers lies to us to pull us away from our Father. It can be a great struggle to ignore him, to kick him to the curb, but we have to learn that he is the father of lies.
Great giveaway!
I wrestle with confidence and second guessing. Constantly praying that my words will be measured in truth and purpose. I often ‘hear’ the negativity over what God is trying to whisper to my heart. I’m getting better and my relationships with my children and my husband continue to prosper.
Inside chatter (for me) is discouraging, self defeating, and hurtful thoughts running through my mind. Inside chatter can turn something into any thing else; always something bigger, something more harmful.
Inside chatter instigates quarrels. It can turn my husband washing dishes to help out into he’s washing dishes because I took too long to get them done because I’m lazy!!
As Christians we who have the mind of Christ are called to think on what is lovely and pure, and right and true (Phil 4:8). We are to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Rom 12:2)! To bring our thoughts into the obedience of Christ (2Cor 10:4-5)!
That ugly, impure, inside chatter more often than not bears the fruit of the flesh (Gal 5:19-21)
We have to recognize and acknowledge that if our inside chatter isn’t bearing fruit, if what we are believing are lies then they are of the enemy who is the father of lies!
The Bible says that we glorify God by bearing fruit (much fruit) How can we bear much fruit and glorify God unless we are diligent in abiding? We have to keep our eyes on Jesus, we have to walk by the Spirit, we have to die daily and submit to God.
(Jas 4:1-12)
Honestly, I am a “people pleaser”. I hate it when people don’t like me. Negative chatter has affected me often in the past, but I am learning when it starts to remind myself about the TRUTH. I am what God says I am and not what the world says. I am always accepted by Him, even if no one would accept me in this world! Thanks for the reminder!
I’ve learned that I CHOOSE what chatter goes on in my mind….And I can in turn choose only positive things accompanied by truth learned by reading His word! 😉
I am one who is in a constant state of inward chatter. 🙁 I worry that I said/did the wrong thing. I worry that I looked stupid. I HAVE to keep that inward chatter at bay. I realize that I am defeating work in me and others that God wants to do because I am letting doubt and worry creep in and inhibit what God wants to do through and to me. When the chatter begins in my mind, I quickly work to chatter about other times I have been in similar situations and how God was able to work because I STOPPED that unfruitful chatter.
The Bible tells us to be anxious about nothing! It is actually a tough choice! But I choose to allow God to work in me and through me… not my mindless chatter!
I’ve learned that I CHOOSE what chatter goes on in my mind….And I can in turn choose only positive things accompanied by truth learned by reading His word!
There always seems to be inside chatter going on in my head b/c I am always over analyzing situations and conversations. My self esteem takes a whoopin’ when I base my worth on what people do or don’t do. Right now I’m in the process of leading a sm group through my church using your book unglued and I’m so anxious that only 1 or maybe no people will show up. I loved your book and want to pass on all the wisdom you give in it. However my inside chatter (satan) is telling me I can’t leada small group.I don’t know enough scripture, I talk too much, I speak too loudly and I’m very high energy. I could go on and on but you get the point. I have learned to ignore the negative chatter and keep walking on the path I believe God has led me on. Satan wants me to stop and turn around but I won’t b/c God is going to lead women to this sm group and we’re going to learn to be calm in the chaos together.
Can’t wait for the webcast. I fight the negative voices in my head. I know where they come from, but sometimes they are so loud and convincing.
I’m 30 and I still deal with low self-esteem. Thinking negatively about myself has always been a big problem for me. As a New Year resolution I promised my self no more negative talk.
I remember that inside chatter so clearly from my younger years. How damaging it can be! Its so hard to overcome as an adult.
Inside chatter is and can be the work of the evil one, I am convinced..Inside chatter does more harm to my spirit than anything else. That’s when I do not trust God to do what He has set out to do in my life. Where am I in all of this? How do I stop the chatter, the negative talk and the thoughts that minimize my potential? I think it happens when I soak into the truths in the Bible, turn my thoughts into HIS thoughts.. and they are not negative.. that’s for sure..
As women we tend to believe the bad stuff about ourselves….it’s easier. We form our self image on what our culture teaches us so if we don’t measure up to be that beautiful person we are shown, then we automatically see ourselves as flawed and trade the truth for the negative. I have a favorite quote I heard some time ago that I remind myself very often and share with women I mentor and that is this, “you must talk to yourself more than you listen to yourself.” If you listen to yourself, this is the inside chatter that goes on in our minds that we have internalized about ourselves or our situations that may have been formed by culture, upbringing, others, etc.. The truth is, God has very clearly set forth in His word that if we are His, we are wholly loved, fully forgiven, a child of the King, and have everything we need in Him! These are the things we need to be telling ourselves on a daily basis if need be rather than listening to ourselves. The bible calls this renewing of your mind. Romans 12:1-2 are two of my life verses and how I have found victory in talking to myself more than listening to myself. Sadly because I believe we have a very poor understanding of who God is and who we are to Him, we then only have the world or our flesh to shape our self image. This battle will be won by drawing near to God, knowing Him and hiding His word in our heart. Then, the negative inside chatter will be replaced with truth and the joy of knowing who we are in Him will set our minds free indeed!
Inside chatter starts from the moment I open my eyes in the morning until I shut them at night. I’ve come to learn that we (women) are a lot tougher on ourselves than what is true in reality. I’ve struggled to discern the difference between the Holy Spirit prodding me to learn and better myself…and what is just silly talk that wears me down and aims to darken my day. There is a difference. And I’m learning day-by-day. Thanks for bringing this topic up for discussion, Lysa!
I have learned that these “whispers” can try to define who you are and make you act like a total different person that who you know you were made to be. Its’ really like having the people sitting on each shoulder lol. You have to knock the “whispering” (DEVIL) side off and listen to what Jesus says about you!!
I have struggled my entire life with inside chatter. It has resulted in an eating disorder, bad relationships, major mess-ups, tons of regret, and low self-esteem. Just last night I had a heart to heart with my 11 year old and my heart broke when he confessed the same things I feel. I prayed last night and today for God to show me how to help my son when I don’t even know how to “fix” this in my own life. This was an answer to prayer and I WILL be tuning in tomorrow. Thank you!
Years ago as a new believer a spiritual mentor told me when negative thoughts haunt a person they are NOT from our Father. That revelation has helped me catch myself when inside chatter has me spiraling downward – God gently guides us, lovingly teaches us lessons through the Holy Spirit; He does not inspire us to loath ourselves! When inside chatter tries to get a hold of my heart though my mind, I must recognize then acknowledge what is happening, once alerted I cling to the Truth: I am a child of God who can trust in His grace, acceptance, forgiveness, protection, promises, and His perfect Love!
I have never had alot of self-esteem/confidence. But my teenage years were really bad. I remember one day a popular girl at school actually said hi to me and called me by my name. That made me feel so good. I decided later in life that I was a good person and if people couldn’t see that then that was their problem. I just pray that I can teach my kids that not everyone is going to like you and be nice to you, but that they should always treat people with kindness and respect and always treat them the way that they want to be treated. Loved you on KLOVE last week.
“Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.”
I am going to write that down and post it where I can see it EVERY day. I have never been part of the “in” crowd and being a young parent with three small children while the majority of mine and my husbands friends are all still single is hard! There are so many times that we get left out because people assume we can’t participate because of the kids. Even at church, it’s hard to fit in the the groups we “should” because there is such an age difference in us and the people we have the most in common with. It’s taken several years for me to feel comfortable being the youngest by many years in a room with people that have kids the same age as mine. Sometimes the devil gets in my head and tries to make me feel alienated from everyone because God has given me a unique life…a life that has a purpose and a plan. It’s easy to become discouraged and lonely but I try to remember that God made me the way that I am and gave me the life that He planned for me. I shouldn’t feel left out of anything, when He could be protecting me. I shouldn’t feel “less” of anything, when He made me to fit perfectly into His plan.
I love this post. I spoke straight to my heart!
Tiffany, Daniesville GA
Good word to plant in my soul! Thank you!
I obsess over the inside chatter – the woulda, coulda, shoulda’s. These seeds of self doubt creep up all the time and leave me with anxiety and feelings of inadequacy.
Ugghhh…”inside chatter” is something that I’ve REALLY been struggling a lot with the past couple of weeks and it’s amazing how crippling it is and how badly it effects my mood and actions. The Lord & I have been having some chats about it and I’m trying really hard to take every thought captive. Sometimes I wish I could just shut my mind off but I’m learning that when I start going down the road of listening to the inside chatter, I need to stop and ask the Lord to show me truth and redirect my thoughts to things that are true and loving and not made up craziness! <3
I’ve learned that the inside chatter is louder than anything anyone has to has – perhaps because I’m nearer to it. It also hurts the most. In order to combat negative inner chatter, I sometimes speak aloud to myself and combat that voice with things I know God has said about me.
My inside chatter tells me that I’m not good enough. Christian enough. Liked enough. When I am not invited to events, this chatter gets louder and confirmed. I try to remind myself to not take it personally – they probably did not intentionally exclude me. And even if they did, their approval and acceptance are not what I should look for – Christ’s is!
It always seems that the “inside chatter” is the way Satan uses to distract me from the voice I need to listen too. When God starts speaking, Satan attacks full steam- which is usually through my low self esteem. I will feel like I am moving forward and following God whole heartedly, then I will get one comment…. Usually from a family member, and I shrink, start listening to all the old “chatter” that I am not good enough, nor will I ever be enough to complete what God is calling me too. It is a major battle, as I get older I am stronger in my Faith and I know that “with God nothing is impossible”, even when battling myself!!!
I have the worst inside chatter. I am always so negative. Very rarely do I say much of anything positive in my inside chatter. I long to change this! I pray the Lord will help me and show me ways to change my inside chatter.
I’m a new college student, newly wed last year and have finally started getting more involved with my church. My husband and I have become good friends with a couple that have been very supportive. My friend, Jenna, has helped me through the book Unglued because I’ve always had a hard time channeling the negative. After reading your book I’ve come to know that “I can’t control what happens to me everyday, but I can control how I feel about them.” Living by your quote, I’ve learned to take all that negative inside chatter and use it for something more productive, like time spent talking to God. My favorite thing to do is talk to Him when I’m driving alone, as if He were my passenger. I’ll talk to Him about everything, including why my husband does some of the things he does :). Through your book I’ve learned that I am a daughter of the King and, although it still happens from time to time (hey, I’m human) if I’m living for Him, I don’t have the time to “lose my cool” I simply have to turn to Him and He’ll show me what to do. Living by His grace had really helped my marriage and walk with the Lord.
What have I learned… Several years ago my husband and I moved because he got a job in another state. A few weeks after the move I found out I was pregnant. We planned the move but a new job, new house, moving and then finding out we were to be parents was enough to put my husband over the edge. He found an old girlfriend and decided he wanted her instead of our family. It was pure hell. I had lots of chatter in my head and out from people giving me advice. If I would have listened to them I would have done what I always thought I would… castrate him and wave goodbye… Thankfully I didn’t listen to myself or some of those around me. I prayed and had one set of friends that gave me Godly council. God is in control. Read and pray scriptures that show you that YOU ARE GODS creature and HE HAS A PLAN. It may not be your plan but this is NOT a surprise to Him. Trust Him. And when I closed out my thoughts and the thoughts of those who were talking in secular perspective I found that my inner chatter would dissolve. BUT I had to work at keeping the godly chatter going IN to make sure the other chatter stayed out. Praise God that my husband repented and we are now 6 years after that mess doing very well. That lesson taught me how important what is going in affects what happens inside and comes out. If you stop putting in the good chatter you will never be able to combat the chatter from within.
Like many others, I have let inside chatter control me to the point that I decide what someone else is thinking about given situation. It’s not fair s since I wouldn’t want people deciding how I think. Why do I do that?! Our small group is currently studying Soul Detox and it had a section on this but I need a whole lesson JUST on this alone!
I have learned that when I neglect time in the word & with God my inside chatter is lethal. When I do fill my spirit and get in His presence, the chatter still comes but it is powerless against all the word I have to cast it down. For me, time with God on a daily bases is the ONLY way I survive the inside chatter
Inside Chatter – I think the negativity of it plagues every woman – more than anyone wants to admit. I have battled this my whole life. I am adopted. Even though I have wonderful parents, the constant “chatter” in my head of “You were a mistake….no one wanted you…you should never have been born.”….goes on so much and a lot of the time I am not even aware that it is. I got told I was “fat” and “ugly” when I was in school….that “chatter” goes on in my head as well….as I hear those voices and I am agreeing with them. I am praying and trying to replace that “chatter” with the Word of God. It is a daily battle. Help me God!
Negative inside chatter has been an issue for me my whole life. if someone close to me (kids, husband, neighbors, co-workers, family) speaks (or does not speak) to me in a way that tells me something is bothering them, i immediately think it must be something I have done or not done. Somehow I have convinced myself that I am responsible for their happiness and therefore I have failed the relationship in some way.Then I backoff/retreat until it passes. But i end up feeling like I am not sufficient/not worthy. Completely irratational! I have gotten better about this by remembering “i am fearfully and wonderfully made”. I remember I am a child of God and He will use me to bless those around me.
Its amazing to me that when we allow God to lead us where we end up. Making changes in my life and working on allow God to be my everything and my everything about God I have not been sure where to start in some areas and A good friend promoted this on her facebook wall and now I have an answer, and Im so exicted to be able to enjoy this tomrrow and cant wait to see how its gonna affect my stuggles in my walk with Christ… Have a great day!!
I learned a long time ago that listening to inside chatter will make me a crazy person! So I try to disconnect myself from it, witness it as separate from me, and remind myself who GOD says I am.
I think as women we all deal with that inside negative chatter. I have learned through rejection and “not being included’ that in the end I WILL be included at CHRIST’S table. And that I am HIS daughter. So when that negative stuff begins in my head, I keep my eyes on HIM and the PRIZE waiting for me at the finish line! The Bible tells us we will be rejected and hurt by it, but our JOY should be only in HIM! Thanks so much Lisa for your post!!
I have learned to tell the negative chatter to hush and read a devotional or scripture to align my mind and thoughts on where they should be.
The only way I calm the inside chatter is with God’s word …its my mute button.
I believe everyone goes through episodes of this in life, and it is how you handle those episodes that determines how you will respond. However, growing maturity in the Lord gives you a better perspective!! I know there have been times when someone has felt like I was the one who initiated the,..,”she didn’t pick me” feeling, or the “I am not liked by her” feeling, when this was absolutely not the case, just a matter of human forgetfulness or a total misunderstanding So many times, there are explanations for these types of things. However, it can cause deep wounds. I have found that there are so many verses that speak of His love for us and what we are to Him, which matters so much more in this short lifetime on earth. He can also lift those feelings of doubt and fear away. Thank you Lysa for being real about so many issues! You keep me going!!!
Wow, what a grip inside chatter has played into my life! It tears not only me down, but everyone around me down too. It has caused rifts and anger, resentments and unnecessary unhappiness. I often don’t catch it soon enough, and then I blow up and find that what I’ve been telling myself is completely untrue or it’s true but inflatated to a point where it’s unhealthy. I really hate it, and have prayed time and time again to be free of it, but I still struggle. The strugge leave me feeling even more awful myself than I originally felt. It has put a tremendous strain on my marriage too. It’s a daily struggle, one I would like to break free of forever. My insecurites always seem to get the best of me, and being brought up in a home that negativity was a fluent language definitely has compounded this issue ten fold. I’m looking forward to hearing the webcast, I really think this could help in giving me some more tools in how to handle my inside chatter. I haven’t read any of your books yet, but I have a sneaking suspicion they are right up my alley. I’ll be listening! Thank you for your posting-a girlfriend of mine recommended you, and I see why!
I have dealt with a lot of negative chatter that comes from within! Low self esteem, no self confidence etc… I know it’s Satan feeding me a lot of bad thoughts, but it is so hard to overcome!!
I have always had issues with inside chatter. This was just what I needed today!!!! Thank you so much for all that you are doing. We just started UNGLUED at our church last night with 16 precious women!!!!!!! God is at work!!!!!!!!
Pam
I have learned that it can pick me up or tear me down. I’ve been working towards building myself up and rebuking the negative thoughts.
I also realize that my demeanor takes on my thought patterns and can affect those around me (especially my children) so I really try to focus on the good. When I can’t, I take the time to pray and speak with my husband.
Love your products!
I’ve dealt with “negative chatter” for as long as I can remember. I lived with a father that I could never really please, and those constant feelings of inadequacy have carried with me all of my life. I’m constantly comparing, constantly telling myself you are not good enough, you have nothing to offer, there is nothing special about you. Everyday is a war in my mind-battling those negative thoughts. God has reminded me through His word that I am loved, I am cherished, and that Jesus laid down his life for ME. It’s those reminders that help me combat the sometimes minute by minute battle I have over my thoughts.
Inside Chatter is dangerous. I think women are especially vulnerable to it. We’re so hard on ourselves already and we face so much outward negativity (media, etc.) So many of us are constantly comparing ourselves to others and thus, deriving our self worth (or lack thereof) from how we feel we measure up to someone else, whether it be a mom from school or a mom on TV. We need to remember that we’re beautifully and wonderfully made. God loves us and He created us for wonderful things. Things that are a gift. God doesn’t care if we gave our kids cereal and fruit for dinner or if we have cellulite. We try so hard and He knows. We need to give ourselves a break and remember that we’re pretty good people and speak that out loud!!
This topic could NOT be more applicable to my life right now! In fact I just was dealing with this all week last week and then this weekend some. I have found these sneak up a lot in moments of emotional break down or hormones have kicked in and I am by myself to my own thoughts. I really struggle with it in terms of believing lies within my relationship to my fiance and thinking he must be thinking I am not good enough or he has made a mistake in choosing someone with issues like myself. I also hear these voice in the school/work environment, I am in college right now and a senior it seems like so many other students are set on what job they will have or where they will go after college and I have yet to know. I think these little voices of our identity not being in Christ but in things of this world or through Satan are SO easy to believe and something I am SO thankful for the first you posted and being reminded that our fullness is only and can only be found in Christ!
I am so excited for this podcast and this giveaway and to learn more about this because it is deff. an area I need a lot of improvement in and want to surrender over to the Lord.
~Kassandra
My negative inside chatter has been over guilt the last few weeks. That is just the last few weeks, there has been much more over the last four months. There have been a few of those conversations going on in my head about how I am going to let some of the things that have happened define me. Well I have come to the conclusion that they are all going to define me to a certain point, but if I hand it over to God how it defines me is going to be a lot better and a lot different then how I let it define me.
I, too, have battled inside chatter for as long as I can remember – mostly due to being obese for as long as I can remember. On the days when I feel less of a person because of my weight or because I was left out -yes, it even happens as an adult; then I, sadly, let the inside chatter gets the better of me. So I realize that I must keep God’s Word & Truth in my heart that I may remember that God says I am beautiful inside AND out. After all, I was worth dying for on the cross to Him … and that is worth far more than any human thoughts or words!
I am learning to deal with the inside chatter better now that I have children that I am trying to teach to ignore the internal negativity. As I try to help them overcome their insecurities it helps me recognize my own. There have been many family discussions about how your worth is not determined by others, but by yourself and God.
I have learnt and am continuing to learn that my inside chatter is not me but the devil trying so hard to pull me down. Yes I have giving into those thoughts to many times. The thoughts of not being good enough or being stupid or not wanted. When I notice that my onside chatter starts to go that way I quickly as say a pray that The Lord will remove them thoughts and that I realize that they are not mine and that I am stronger then the devil who puts them there. The Lord loves me and has made me who I am. I am beautiful, smart, I am wanted and most definitely good enough in the eyes of my Father!
I have learned that inside chatter is both good and bad. It can serve you when it comes from a place of peace to build yourself up. Going in the other direction it tends to narrate all of your insecurities and fears. I literally have to stop and tell myself that I will not spend my energy thinking about things that will probably not even matter in the future. We sometimes have to remind ourselves that we are good enough no matter what anyone else directly or indirectly does to make us feel otherwise. God does not make mistakes when he brings us into being. Therefore, our quirks and differences from others make us completely perfect for the journey He has made for us.
Thanks for the reminder about inside chatter. I have struggled with this for some time now and was taught how to deal with it. Your entry has reminded me how much I have strayed from this counsel. I was told to hold every thought captive… when a bad thought comes to mind recite a bible verse or pray to God. I also had note cards posted around my house (fridge, bathroom mirror… etc.) with God’s word on it… those were called my “stop” cards. Whenever a bad thought came to mind, I’d read it and stop the thought and filled my head & heart with his word. Thanks for reminded me of this… now off to find some note cards. : )
I have had to silence my own chatter for years. Most recently, just finally realizing I had to break the cycle of abusive relationships I was allowing myself in, because somehow I could never do better. I have a 4 year old daughter with my ex husband, who was abusive, but I stayed until she came. I knew then I could not allow her to grow up believing that was how she should be treated. I struggle with not becoming unglued at times during the transfers of our daughter, because he does not have her best intentions in mind. We are starting a women’s study on this at my church next week. I’m so excited!
I would love to be able to turn off or change my inside chatter that tells me I am not good enough, that I’m afraid to take that risk for fear of failure, that if only…My inside chatter is often negative and hurtful and things that I would NEVER think to speak to someone else.
Would love to win these great books and goodies!
I learned a very long time ago that the only voice I need to listen to is God’s. He keeps saying to me “Take my hand”, “I’m here for you”, “I’ll carry you all the way”, “I love you”. He is my glue.
I struggle with an inner monologue of constant accusations of my inadequacies. My poor husband has to remind me gently to STOP IT. 🙂 I am working on changing my thought patterns and look forward to webcast tomorrow night!
I wish I could join you on the web cast, however, that is the night of our Women’s Bible Study at our church! 🙁
What I’ve learned about inside chatter is that it can be dangerous and destructive if It’s the “wrong” kind of chatter. Is it from God? Is it positive? I’ve often had the thoughts of, “you’re not good enough, you can’t beat this, you’re not a very good mother”… But then God steps in to remind me who I am in Him…
Thanks for the reminder about inside chatter. I have struggled with this for some time now and was taught how to deal with it. Your entry has reminded me how much I have strayed from this counsel. I was taught to hold every thought captive… when a bad thought comes to mind recite a bible verse or pray to God. I also had note cards posted around my house (fridge, bathroom mirror… etc.) with God’s word on it… those were called my “stop” cards. Whenever a bad thought came to mind, I’d read it and stop the thought and filled my head & heart with His word. Thanks for reminding me of this… now off to find some note cards. : )
At 19 years old, inside chatter seems like a necessary and inevitable part of every day. Coming from a broken family where my father abandoned me, it’s incredibly difficult to not let the negative chatter in my head overpower the positive chatter. Every time that negative whisper in my heart begins to manipulate my inner being into believing it’s worth less than it is, I’ve trained my heart to yell out the truth so loudly that I hear silence. Once my mind becomes silent, I begin to hear the truth spoken to me: “your Daddy loves you – your Abba Daddy will never leave you.” “You are a beautiful daughter of a king.” “You are worth more than life itself, because you were bought with the blood of Christ.” It’s still difficult to tune out the negative chatter, but when you replace it with God-given truth, it can silence it for the moment.
Just finished the book unglued and the chapter on inside chatter was written just for me. If I’ve came unglued on someone, I always have negative inside chatter saying negative stuff. I’ve learned that I need to start thinking more positively about myself and not believe those lies from the inside chatter. I need to look up, read, memorize uplifting verses on who I am in Christ when I start having this. Such as I’m a new creation, I am loved, I am accepted, I am wanted etc. Thank you so much for your encouraging posts.
I have learned to do my best every single day to NOT listen to the chatter! I too have those chatterings in my head – They don’t like you or love you – you are not good enough – you are too fat – you are ugly – you don’t have any friends –
BUT, GOD is the ONE I have to focus on – JESUS LOVES ME JUST THE WAY I AM & IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT OTHERS THINK!!! I have to strive each day to be MORE like JESUS – & less like the world!!!
I have dealt with a lot of negative inside chatter!! Low self esteem, no self confidence etc… I know it’s Satan feeding me a lot of bad thoughts, but it is so hard to overcome!!
My “inner chatter” is my worst feature. I can’t seem to beat it. I have learned that I should really not put much stock in it & I try to pray it away when the negative chatter begins. I have also learned I can talk myself into or out of anything. I need to find a way to always remember that my God is bigger than any negative thoughts I may have about myself and that I am His precious child.
I too think we all deal with “Inside Chatter”, after all we are only human. For me it’s just realizing when it is happening so I can stop it!
My internal chatter is self- condemning. It is only through keeping my focus on Christ instead of myself that I can find peace and whole ness 🙂
I have had to silence my own chatter for years. Finally realizing I had to break the cycle of abusive relationships I was allowing myself in, because somehow I could never do better. I have a 4 year old daughter with my ex husband, who was abusive, but I stayed until she came. I knew then I could not allow her to grow up believing that was how she should be treated. I struggle with not becoming unglued at times during the transfers of our daughter, because he does not have her best intentions in mind. We are starting a women’s study on this at my church next week. I’m so excited!
Oh haven’t we ALL had that situation happen to us? (But if not, I’m very happy you haven’t!) But for the rest of us, whew, it hurts, makes you feel a little smaller. What I’ve learned at an early age was my worth in God’s eyes. How many times I’ve held up the situation in light of the BIGNESS of God and reminded myself that Him caring about me, matters SO much more then how another flawed human being (like myself!) makes me feel. That’s what we have to do. Hold up each and every ugly, hurtful situation to the light of God’s Word and Truth. It’s more than just words, it’s so empowering, so true, such a comfort and the source of everything I am.
I let too much negative inside chatter inside and have conversations with it. It is hard to overcome. I try to keep remembering that verse from Philippians 4:8: “Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.” Also 2 Corinthians 10: 5 – “We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ,”
My short version is joy is from the inside out.God gives us true joy and by having true joy, those moments of inside chatter are fleeting by putting faith first and having a personal relationship with the author of true joy. Thank you Jesus!
I have had to silence my own chatter for years. Finally realizing I had to break the cycle of abusive relationships I was allowing myself in, because somehow I could never do better. I have a 4 year old daughter with my ex husband, who was abusive, but I stayed until she came. I struggle with not becoming unglued at times during the transfers of our daughter, because he does not have her best intentions in mind. We are starting a women’s study on this at my church next week. I’m so excited!
I, up until recently, have battled with my own chatter. Wether it be in my marriage, friendships or family relationships, I’ve never felt “good enough” and often found my own reasons why these people shouldn’t be drawn to me. I would (and at times still do) come up with battles that I’m fighting with people in my life without them even having a clue. I know that God has blessed me with these amazing people who will always be there and will always love me regardless of the situations, but at times Satan gets in there and tells me otherwise. I’ve found comfort in The Lord and He reminds me continually that none of this is from Him. It’s comforting now to know that when I start to chatter myself into a funk, God is there to pull me out and remind me that I am loved unconditionally by Him and by the people He has provided me with as well.
I’m reading “Unglued” currently and learning so much (as usual!). Have also read “Becoming More Than A Good Bible Study Girl” and “Made To Crave” and have gleaned so much. The trick for me is those reminders to myself in actual moments of craving or unglued-ness of who I am in Christ. Of the TRUTH! It’s a real trick for me to not just react to everything/everyone around me and slow down just enough to whisper Truth to myself. Thanks for all you do and all you have shared, Miss Lysa.
Any chance of a re-broadcast? I’d love to listen but it’s 6pm in Alberta and we’re in the middle of a quick supper before kids head to kids’ club at the church??
I am learning that the chatter is often the enemy whispering his lies to me in order to distract me from my Father.
Great giveaway!
Oh how many times I have to remind myself to turn off the “chat room” in my head! How many times I have had to “block” satan from being a member of that chat room!
I want to share this with my daughter…she is only 8, but I can see she is already feeling this way. I have never thought about small hurts in my past being a “defining moment”, but I do remember being young (just barely!) and feeling like a lot of things were the end of the world, when in hindsight, they really weren’t. There will always be a sting when our feelings are hurt or we are left out, even as adults. Putting it in perspective along with the rest of our lives is the important step.
As quickly as the inside negative chatter begins I have to take a step back and discern if it is the Spirit teaching, and convicting or if it is satan trying to convince me of lies. If it does not line up with the Truth then I know it is not from the Spirit. The flesh is the old me, I have been made a new creation that is one with God because of the death, burial and ressurection of Christ! I marinate on who I am in Him!
I have had lots of inside chatter. It has gotten better since I do my best to stay in God’s word. However there are times when Satan just slips right in. I have two older sisters and we are just built different and we have different looks. I used to get yours sisters are so pretty… you don’t look anything like them. I have gotten over it mostly but sometimes those comments sneak back up. I know God made me beautiful just the way I am and I am beautiful in his eyes but that inside chatter does come up….
I have had to silence my own chatter for years. Finally realizing I had to break the cycle of abusive relationships I was allowing myself in, thinking I could never do better. I have a 4 year old daughter with my abusive ex-husband, but I stayed until she came. I struggle with not becoming unglued at times during the transfers of our daughter, because he does not have her best intentions in mind. We are starting a women’s study on this at my church next week. I’m so excited!
Lysa,
Thank you for this reminder. I have experienced “inside chatter” and the difference it truly makes in our women’s lives and minds and identities. I was raised with the voices of judgement and not good enough to please in my head. Only through 30 years of unconditional love from the most Godly man on Earth reminding me of our Father’s love and promise have these voices changed. I am so thankful today that I can truly be what He made me to be and not be held back by Satan’s lie!!
Thank you so much for this opportunity to hear you and Sheila speak. I love that we are all invited! I am pretty sure as women we have all heard the chatter at some time or another. Thank you for the reminder that I have been given fullness in Christ.
as i get older im realizing i can not base my perception on what i feel.my feelings are too fickle and dependant on too many things that change such as hormones,past experiences,etc. before i know it i have blown a situation all out of proportion because i was so sure i knew what the other person was thinking towards me. i can only hold onto the unfailing promise of Gods love and who i am in him.
My short version is joy is from the inside out.God gives us true joy and by having true joy, those moments of negative inside chatter are fleeting by putting faith first and having a personal relationship with the author of true joy. Thank you Jesus!
I struggle with inside chatter all the time especially since we have taken on the task of being caregivers to an elderly parent. I know God is so much bigger then my problems but I find it hard to let go and give it all to HIM.
It is unfortunate how many times we allow the inside chatter to effect the conduct of our lives.
Thank you so much for your books and ministry they have truly blessed me in countless ways.
I have learned that I always have a choice: to listen to the voice of Satan, who is the King of Liars, inside my head (the Inside Chatter), or to listen to the voice of God. Even Jesus when tempted in the wilderness had a choice to make. He could listen to the words of Satan, or He could stand on the word of God. Being able to distinguish between the voices in the moment comes easier as I remain close to the Lord. So far to go in my struggles, but this Truth always encourages me. I don’t have to believe everything I think, but rather, I can filter everything I think through the Word of God, my standard of measure. He can be my anchor and my compass in all situations if I allow Him to be, so that I resemble more of a thermostat than a thermometer.
I am looking forward to the webcast and am enjoying your Made to crave devotions through youversion! What a great package to give away!
As women I think we are all inclined to that negative inner chatter – I too believe that it is the enemy trying to pull us away from GOD. I have had many times when I am “not invited” to something… but I DO KNOW THAT I am invited to sit at CHRIST’S table and that I am HIS daughter. I take great comfort in knowing this – all of us need to keep our eyes on HIS PRIZE!!! Thanks for this post Lysa!
I’ve learned that inside chatter not only affects you on the inside, it changes who you are on the outside, too. Letting the negativity continue in your head/heart will have an effect on how you interact with others. I must not let it continue. Both for my sake and those I am around, but for my daughter… I must show her to not believe the inside chatter.
Well, It goes to figure that most of mine is wrong….but it never feels like that at the time. Go figure.
God can fill our hearts with “His chatter” and replace the negative “human” chatter we often face. When I take the time to fill my mind and heart with God’s Word the “I’m not good enough chatter” is often replaced or backed with verses to remind me what I am to Christ and who I am in Him.
Being adopted and in foster homes as a child I often felt alone and didn’t seem to fit in anywhere. Unfortunately those feelings and the negative inside chatter followed me into adulthood. I know who I am in Christ but often wonder why it’s so hard for me too accept that…I’m thankful that I have the unconditional love and acceptance from God
I’ve learned that it’s very common in women to have negative chatter. I’ve always felt alone in it but have recently had conversations with several other women who do it. It is a huge area for us to encourage each other and strengthen and build new friendships through support and being open. I pray that Good would help me to be that encourager to other women.
The thing I’ve learned about the “inside chatter”, is if you say something, even to yourself, long enough you begin to believe it so if it’s negative or positive that’s what you begin to believe and base all your choices and decisions on. My problem is still the same though-negative self talk. I know these things but for some reason am unable to overcome.
Thank you Lysa for the reminder that it is not others that define us, but our relationship with God. It is so easy to be caught up in those “defining moments” based on how they affect us at the time. We simply do not know what the other person was thinking that led to their actions or words. This is reminder that we, as women, need to hear regularly, not only to increase our ability to move past these moments, but in an effort to be more purposeful in our words and actions!
In the past my “inside chatter” was too critical & often negative. I have learned to take that negative chatter & find a POSITIVE scripture to counter it. It took some time to change the ticker tape in my mind. Often I would feel anxious, out of control, worried, scared, uncertain – I learned to play a NEW tape: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” John 14:27. I would remember – Jesus already gave me HIS peace. It is mine, I simply need to ACCEPT his offering and I am restored to PEACE. When trouble arises, I can settle myself with NEW “chatter” from the promises of God.
Lisa,
I have also struggled (and continue to struggle) with inside chatter since I was very young. God revealed to me that this form of self pity (along with other forms) is a sin. You see, when you put so much emphasis on yourself, whether it is good or bad, it is selfish. This inside chatter is putting your focus on yourself and taking it off of our Lord and Savior where it belongs. Psalms 10:4 says ” In his pride the wicked man does not seek Him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God.” It’s easy to think of pride as being boastful and puffed up, but the opposite is also true. Selfish pride is any thoughts that turn our focus on ourselves and away from God. Praise Him for his merciful kindness! May we continue to strive to love Him more.
God bless.
I have learned that Praise is miraculous in curtailing my inside chatter …also putting up the STOP SIGN – I love that I talk back to it….and well I guess that might mean I am crazy, but it’s better than believing the wrong things that roll through the backstreets of my head sometimes!
I have found that my inside chatter is just that..mine. No one thinks about me the thoughts I think about myself. The few times that I confide in people my fears or thoughts, they encourage me that it isn’t true. I try to focus on the good and keep the negative out, it is a daily process. Encouraging scriptures make the difference on rough days.
What I’ve learned from my inside chatter is it always comes when there is a decision to be made. Whether it has to do with eating dessert, helping a stranger, in my job, making life changes. It always says, “You’ll never change, you’re always going to be like this. This is your life, so go ahead, that decision won’t make a difference.” Most of the time it wins. I felt very confident after reading Made to Crave, but I slowly slid back down to my corner. I believe every woman has a story about their own inside chatter, it’s something we all struggle with. What we need to do, is recognize when it happens, tell ourselves the Truth of what God speaks over us, and keep goin’. Easier said than done.
I work with teenagers, and lately have been realizing that the same stuff I teach my girls about inside chatter is what I need to be telling myself as well. If we tell ourselves something often enough, we start to believe it. I am God’s precious creation, made uniquely to be who I am – and so is every other person around me! I need to talk to myself the same way I want my teens to be able to talk to themselves – as a wonderfully made child of God!
I continually try to remind myself why does “inside chatter” matter??? It doesn’t! It has nothing to do with serving The Lord so that usually turns my negative thought patterns around!!
I have learned that inside chatter has to be replaced with the truth of God’s word in order to stop the cycle. Sometimes it’s a minute by minute struggle for me, but I have to make an effort to “take every thought captive” and hold it up to the truth of God’s word. Also, I have found the sooner I recgnize the “chatter” and replace it with God’s truth, the better off I am.
Oh, Lysa, I needed this post today and everyday! I’m looking forward to listening to tomorrow’s webcast. At the age of 57, I’m blessed beyond measure. A widow, I’m a cancer survivor and in good health currently. November 2012 saw the release of my first book. I have a great job. You would think the negative chatter would go away. It is still there – every single day. It goes something like this: “You’re fat, therefore unattractive to men.” (Not true. I’ve been told I’m an attractive woman by men and women.) “You will never ‘make it’ with your writing. Who would want to read it? It will never be a movie.” I fight it every single day. I WILL make it as an author and my book WILL be a movie – if God is willing. Lysa and Sheila – the most wonderful trait the two of you posses is this: Complete honesty with your audience. That means more to me than anything else. Lysa, you share your family happenings. Sheila, I watched you share your financial situation at a WOF event in St. Louis. Real, honest, in-your-face sharing from both of you. What we all need in today’s world. God bless you both!
Being a stander I hear inside chatter a lot. ” Your marriage ois not going to work.” ” Your husbands wants the OW NOT you.” ” He left you and your kids for someone fun and young and exciting.” I hear it all. BUT what the enemy does not know is God loves my marriage far more than I do and He hates divorce so I just say the name of Jesus over and over I declare the word of God and let the eenemy know he is NOT taking my marriage and my family!!!!
I have also struggled (and continue to struggle) with inside chatter since I was very young. God revealed to me that this form of self pity (along with other forms) is a sin. You see, when you put so much emphasis on yourself, whether it is good or bad, it is selfish. This inside chatter is putting your focus on yourself and taking it off of our Lord and Savior where it belongs. Psalms 10:4 says In his pride the wicked man does not seek Him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God. It’s easy to think of pride as being boastful and puffed up, but the opposite is also true. Selfish pride is any thoughts that turn our focus on ourselves and away from God. Praise Him for his merciful kindness! May we continue to strive to love Him more.
God bless.
I’ve discovered that “inside chatter” doesn’t define who I am in Christ. Satan will always bombard us with negative thoughts, but it’s up to us to take those thoughts captive and allow the Holy Spirit to fill us up to brimming ~ the bad overflows out of our hearts as the good fills us up.
This is so helpful for me as I deal with my teenaged daughter. She is struggling through that ‘acceptance’ stage …. middle school girls can be so mean. Thank you Lysa for your encouragement every day!
I haven’t really been dealing with inside chatter, because anytime Satan tries to trick me and lie to me, i have been learning to discern and have clarity and tell him to get behind me! God has been giving me opportunities to speak to my sister in law, last night actually. She is a very young single mother of two who struggles with wanting to be able to be a child herself because she had her first baby while she was still a child. She has never really known or been shown love by her mother so she has lots of inside chatter repeating the horrible things she has heard all her life “you’re worthless, ugly, fat etc” 🙁 I just tell her that God doesn’t say these things to us. God tells us he loves us and we are beautiful and worthy! I love her so much and if I win I will share these awesome books and devotionals with her.
I have learned that over the years I have recorded negative messages in my mind. If I’m not careful to catch them playing over and over and replace them with a truth message, I will believe the negative message and react. Only to realize it was a big fat lie!
This was such a great post, I remember “inside Chatter” in school days and caring so much to be included and what others thought etc…as I grow and definitely more so in the Lord, thoughts of what others think and say are not as important, although there is still inside chatter and basically choosing to not focus on those small situations that are insignificant as compared to the overall picture of what God says about me, how HE accepts me and loves and has chosen me! I love your blog/OBS and books! cant wait for the webcast tomorrow! 🙂 thank you for your ministry!
I do this a LOT. The other day, I caught myself doing it and then asked myself, “who in the world are you talking to?” I had completely lost focus on the activity at hand. And most of the time, the “chatter” IS negative. I really, REALLY need to stop – what does it accomplish other than reinforcing those negative thoughts & ideas?
Wow not really sure where to start with this other than – my inside chatter really disturbs me. I have read your book Unglued and am reading the Unglued Devotional now. I gave my book to a friend so she can have the blessing of reading it. I have struggled with inside chatter or should I say satan’s quite lies most of my life. He has always told me that I have not been and never will be good enough for any thing. I hit absolute rock bottom 3 1/2 years ago. Satan’s lies had finally got the best of me. I had been following his lies about my husband and finances and myself for 5 years. I got in trouble financially with my job and was found out and satans advice was to take myself out of the situation. Inside my head he kept telling me, of course your kids and husband will miss you, but they will get over it – time heals – you don’t want to drag them through the media or court system so this is the perfect answer for you go ahead its ok. I tried to kill myself. Without going into any further details by all rights I should not be here typing this comment BUT GOD stepped in and said I AM NOT DONE WITH YOU YET!!! It was a spiritual battle – and sometimes still is. I am thankful that I am still here with my family. Lets be real I still have LOTS of Unglued moments especialy when things don’t go my way or when things are not done the way I think they should be, (and of course the inside chatter starts) so I have to literally stop right then and there and give it all over to God to take care of and deal with. Sometimes that happens after I have made a total BOOB of myself. The best thing about that is, you can always start over and when that inside chatter starts, I know all I have to do is call upon the Lord and He will cover me with His Peace!!
I have been fighting the inside chatter my whole life it seems. The negative whispers into my ear and heart have lied to me too many times. I have made unhealthly choices in my life based on that negative chatter. Raising three teen girls I do not want them plagued by the same tactics that the enemy used on me. I want to teach my girls to turn off the negative chatter. I want them to live in truth. I am excited about the webcast.
Growing up I was always told how worthless I was by my “preacher” step-father. The verbal and physical abuse was constant. Those words and actions have followed me all my life. That is until I found my real Father’s amazing saving grace. Even though I know I’m someone special in HIS eyes, those words and memories still haunt me today. The awesome thing now is that they’re just bad memories and when the chatter starts I have positive thoughts and prayers to replace them. I almost always have a song floating around in my head and thanks to K-Love it’s a positive song that I can use to drown out those negative thoughts and feelings. The song sometimes escapes and my patients and families in ICU get a little positive tune too!
I can absolutely say without a doubt that the inside chatter is what has been most detrimental to anything I’ve ever tried to accomplish. I would often talk about myself much worse than anyone else did. I’d never say anything positive about myself, what I looked like, and I’d struggle with receiving compliments. I always felt like everyone else lied to me, but I told myself the truth. Unfortunately, it had gotten to the point of affecting the relationship between my husband and I. Also, my oldest daughter was beginning to pick up some of those habits and words.
I began seeking the help of a Christian counselor, studying God’s Word more intently, and asked my husband to pray for me each time he thought about it. It has been an uphill battle, but I am in the process of retraining my thoughts and desperately trying to learn to see myself as God sees me, not how the enemy wants me to see myself.
As an undergraduate student, I feel like I’m surrounded by situations that seem to welcome negative “inside chatter.” At times, it almost feels like a challenge between my heart and what those thoughts are telling me. However, the more involved I’ve become in my church – specifically through my small group especially – I’ve learned to ignore the negativity.
I’m learning to realize that I have been put on this earth for a purpose and no matter how many times the thoughts “you’re not as smart as everyone else in your major,” or you “won’t find someone who’ll accept you for you,” creep in, I’m reminded of the promises Christ as made to me through His word. I am loved by Him and I couldn’t ask for anything else to help combat those thoughts.
The “inside chatter” can try to bring me down, but I’m going to continue to wake up every morning with an optimistic attitude and the mentality that with Christ on my side, I can tackle anything.
I remember this well from when I was in school and as a teenager. It was so rough and so hard to get over as an adult :/
As a new graduate from veterinary school, the comments you look so young were negative to me. You are too young to be doing this, you can’t know anything, can I really trust my animal to you? I had to learn that I could do this. I did not know Jesus then, so it was probably harder than it should have been. But now 20ish years later, I thank the people who tell me I look young. And I accept that some people will not like me. I let God bring us the proper clients and I try my best to serve them with love and grace.
chatter…. well for me I have learned that its an easy way to know who are people you should stay away from. By easy I don’t mean that it will not hurt, oh it can hurt real bad! But at least you won’t waist your time thinking your best friends and building a relationship only to have it fall down around you.
I hope to learn more from watching you both talk about this! And what a great giveaway! Every book that your giving away is on my list of books I need to read but can’t buy right now. I know that whoever wins those will be blessed more then they even know it now!
Oh my inside chatter never stops chatting. Sometimes just a little forgetfulness from a friend can make my inside chatter go crazy and spread negative thoughts. I’m a single mom and my inside chatter just wants to tell me what I did or what I’m not doing right. It drives me crazy, but like I tell my son we are not perfect and that we just have to try our best and move forward. I’m learning how to ignore the negative chatter from inside b/c its another way for the devil to succeed and I will not allow him.
I am pretty consistent with the negative chatter but I’ve learned to turn it off and move on by offering it up to God. I hope I can soon stop it before it stops through God’s love and grace.
I battle with inside chatter a great deal. I am prone to believe it. After an attack and especially when I am not very successful in fending it off – I have learned the best thing I can do is go to the Word and fill my inside with all the truth that God says I am. I tell myself over and over – what matters, what is important, is what God says I am – no one else. When I do that, I can then look at the “smallness” of the moment that started the chatter in the first place. Nothing eases my wounds like God’s opinion of me. 🙂
I encountered Mean Girls late in life — I was 37 years old — and that’s precisely when the negative inside chatter (NIC) began. I have struggled with it ever since, but when NIC is tearing at my heart and soul I just tell myself to just have amnesia — like Christ does about our transgressions. You know, the ones that he has wiped clean. If that doesn’t stick, then I just go do something loving and kind for someone else. Focusing on their needs makes me forget about NIC and transforms my heart attitude… and re-sets my inside chatter. Plus, it helps me remember to be His hands and His feet in the lives of others rather than the victim of mean ole Nic. <3
I remember when we moved to the city where we currently live,changing my hairstyle to try and fit in. I remember that all of the ladies looked so well dressed and put together at Church and I guess I thought cutting off my naturally curly hair and buying a straightening iron, several smooth curling irons and styling products would make me feel a part. Well it has been 7 years since we have lived here and I grew my curly hair back and put away the straightening products. The Lord has and continues to show me when those feelings of worthiness creep in, that He is sufficient, my worth is in Him, and He is all I need.
I’ve learned that the “inside chatter” is just the devil talking, feeding on my insecurities. I need to fill myself, my mind and heart with God’s truth and then the talking turns into mere whispers that I can barely hear, and shake them easily knowing how God sees me.
I have learned that inside chatter keeps me from doing things that I really want to do because of the negitivity that I fill my own head with. I have really started making an effort to stop the negitive chatter before it starts to aftect me and replace it with positive thoughts. I am just thankful I am not the only one that has this “chatter” lol! Whew! I am normal lol! Thanks for helping me on my journey to a better me and making me a better Mom and Wife. 🙂
I haven’t really been dealing with inside chatter, because anytime Satan tries to trick me and lie to me, i have been learning to discern and have clarity and tell him to get behind me! God has been giving me opportunities to speak to my sister in law, last night actually. She is a very young single mother of two who struggles with wanting to be able to be a child herself because she had her first baby while she was still a child. Her mother told her the only option was to keep thr baby. She has never really known or been shown love by her mother so she has lots of inside chatter repeating the horrible things she has heard all her life “you’re worthless, ugly, fat etc” 🙁 I just tell her that God doesn’t say these things to us. God tells us he loves us and we are beautiful and worthy! I love her so much and if I win I will share these awesome books and devotionals with her.
I too was that girl not getting picked. For most of Junior High I didn’t have any friends in the entire school and that is not an exaggeration. I turned to food as a friend and believe what the school said about me being “fat”. Looking back at the pictures, I wasn’t fat by a long shot, but I believe them, and definitely gave in to what they said and by high school I really was fat and have been ever since. I am learning to listen to what God says and to know that I truly am his princess. It’s very very difficult and I am making progress, all be it slowly. I wish I had truly understood for the past 23 years that it was Satan all along. But it sounds so much like my voice. Thank you for your words and your books. I feel like when I read your words, and your 21 day challenge that you have managed to climb inside and read my private thoughts. I never believed that there was someone out there thinking the same thing as me. I hope I get this opportunity as I would love to hear more of what you have written.
I have a horrible inside chatter. I am absolutely my own worst critic!! I have learned that if I talk to God before getting out of bed in the mornings and ask Him to guide my thoughts and block the negativity from coming through then I have better days. I got my husband into counseling for PTSD from his time in the service and on our very first visit the counselor IMMEDIATELY diagnosed me with Post Traumatic Shock Disorder from the murder of my mother. It has been 11 years and I am finally working through and grieving the way I should!!
I can be the world’s worst at insider chatter! I would never talk that way to anyone else, only myself. I am learning that I need to cut myself some slack, that I am in no way perfect and cannot be expected to be, and that God loves my imperfect self.
Battling the “negative” inside chatter is just that a battle….one that is fought with counteracting it with POSITVE inside chatter…what has helped me is heading right to scripture and reading who I am in Christ…who He has created me to be and am still in the process of being transformed more into His likeness. The negatvie chatter holds a wallop of a punch when it comes to the most important roles in my life as a mother, wife, and teacher. When I’ve failed in one of these areas it’s as if a wall has crumbled on top of me and it takes more time than I’d like to admit to recover. I am thankful for a husband who is patient and encouraging and helps me gain perspective quickly so that the I can once again stand tall, finding my confidence and strength in Christ.
I’ve learned that when my focus is fully on Christ, and serving others in love, then my “inside chatter” is just that – Christ focused. When I (almost daily) get distracted and take my eyes off Christ, then I am suddenly filled with negative chatter. It takes an intential effort to keep my thoughts on the right track.
Thank you, Lysa, for helping us to learn to find our identity in Christ !
I, too, deal with inside chatter. If people aren’t saying things, sometimes I imagine they MIGHT be saying them. I have a very low self-esteem. I am currently striving to lose 90 pounds. I was raised in a Baptist pastor’s home. All of these things together make me very hard on myself. I sometimes feel like people won’t like me because of the way I look. I struggle with this at the age of 31. I am happily married with three kids. I should have a grip on this by now. Thank you for the reminder that more times than not my inside chatter is not needed!!
i’m negative foresure i think alot of that has to do with the fact that all my life I have been left out people yelling at me and always pointing the finger at me and the one to always be doing and giving with nothing in return and not shown love. I try to be postivite or change my way of thinking but so hard when things go wrong or i constantly get yelled at ect
Inside chatter can distract us. Learning not to listen to it.
NOt sure why I am leaving a comment, I will not be able to listen to the webcast since I will be working but my inside chatter is your not good enough, Not sure why God I could be a mom/or wife. am I really loveable? worthy?
Kim
I too like many deal with the inside chatter daily. I find that my best combat is to replace the negative chatter is to rebuke it in the name of Jesus and replace it with a truth and promise from His word. Sometimes it is a repetitive process til I feel his peace.
My inside chatter keeps me from reaching my full potential…from being who God wants me to be…it makes me think I’m not beautiful, but thank God for His Word! For providing us with a weapon that defeats all fear and discouragement! Thank God for His loving grace!
I have learned, very recently (again!) that what I’m thinking on the inside is NOT what others are thinking about me or what God thinks of me! I really need to quit listening to myself when I’m being negative! 🙂
I have learned that my inside chatter changes depending on whether or not I am consistently in the Word and spendging time with Christ. When I have spent time consistent time with Him the inside chatter is not so bad. It is not all lies. When I haven’t had that consistent time with him then my inside chatter tends to be directly opposite of what the Word of God tells me and I tend to struggle more with putting those thoughts out of my mind!
-Gina
OH MY, I have always had neg. chatter in my head. I lost my mother at 8 yrs old, and the negativity in my head began. Often, I have wished to be able to sit and talk this stuff out with my mother, as she would love unconditionally! I am married to a wonderful man in the ministry and the watchful eye of every move certainly does not help the neg chatter. SO WANT to be able to learn to shut off the thoughts that keep me from being ALL that God wants for me and from me so that His light shines out from me.
“Inside Chatter” is one of the worst things I deal with – I am always second guessing myself and telling myself I don’t measure up. Then I remind myself that God indeed knew who I was when he made me. It is a constant battle and I am so glad that God is patient with me.
Inside chatter. So glad to finally have a name for what I do to myself. I long for this type of inside chatter to cease so I can hear more clearly what God would have me do.
I agree with the above comments regarding Facebook and social media. A few years ago, I was very hurt when I wasn’t invited to a close friend’s college graduation ceremony. Pictures were posted on Facebook of her smiling and celebrating her accomplishment with other friends. I had prayed for her and encouraged her along the way while she was earning her degree, but then I wasn’t invited to celebrate in the accomplishment of her goal. I heard the “inner chatter” loud and clear that what I had done for my friend was worthless and it had meant nothing to her. My immediate response was to shut down because of the pain I was feeling. I thought about it and prayed about it for several days. I ended up reaching out to her to tell her that I was so proud of her accomplishment, and that I just wanted to touch base on our friendship. I explained how I was feeling, and we discussed our friendship. We’re still friends today, and I’m glad that I had the courage to ignore the “inner chatter” and have a real conversation with my friend about my feelings and our relationship.
I have a problem with inside chatter a lot. I’m not good enough, I am too fat, No one likes me, I did not get invited to this or that. I have to stop and remember it does not matter what I think of myself or what anyone else thinks of me. It only matters what my Creator thinks. He made me the way he wanted so therefore I must be beautiful and lovable.
I’ve learned that I DO let small chatter effect me. I’ve also learned that I can be the cause of small chatter.
I can relate to this devotional on many levels!! I have had such Strong inside chatter this past year and am hoping it will stop! I’ve been involved with a Church group that I feel has lost sight of how to love one another and except each in the place they stand. All are equal in the site of God. I am looking forward to your webcast!
I have learned, very recently (again!) that what I’m thinking on the inside is NOT what others are thinking about me or what God thinks of me! I really need to quit listening to myself when I’m being negative!
The inside chatter in my head can drive me crazy sometimes, telling me I’m not a good enough mom, wife, or Christian. And even though I know in my heart that comparison kills contentment, sometimes I can’t control the inside chatter that is comparing me to other people.
Inside chatter: Boy has that ever been a problem for me. I have always had the issue of listening to it and it controls my life. Thank you Jesus for showing me the truth and knowing You are in control.
P.S. Pick me…..today I am celebrating my birthday. This would make a great gift. 🙂
Inside Chatter has caused so many problems in my life. I have allowed my negative inside chatter to affect how I see myself, in my eyes and in others. I had such a negative view of myself that it has been a daily, sometimes hourly, struggle to allow God into my heart and remove that chatter, but the more I do it, the easier it becomes. He is no longer whispering, you are my child & I love you – it’s becoming louder and louder as each day passes. I just need to settle down and listen.
I really appreciate this post, it’s something I’ve been struggling with lately! I need to remind myself a lot of the ‘smallness’ of the situation and not let it overwhelm me. Thank you!
My inside chatter can really effect my relationship in the most damaging way. I am learning to try and take each of those thoughts captive, by confessing God’s truth instead of negative thoughts and emotions. I think it usualy starts when I begin to compare myself to others instead of how Christ see’s me. It is a daily process, but one I know I can grow and learn to do.
Insider Chatter can either make us or break us. It can make us turn and lean on the Lord for His help. It can break us in so that we turn to it and away from God’s help.
Inside Chatter can negative but sometimes it can be positive. We choose how we want to turn it around.
I hope to be able to listen to the Webinar.
Tomorrow night will be our 2nd class on Made to Crave. Looking forward to all the lessons. I definitely want to complete Unglued after this series.
I think this is a very important issue that everyone should be taught to deal with, not just women. We all have so many voices in our head; and I love that song that Casting Crowns sings (Voice of Truth), which says, “Out of all the voices calling out to me, I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth”. I know firsthand, what that negative voice says to me at times such as the example you gave. It wasn’t until I sought God’s Word for TRUTH, that I was able to deal w/ the lies the inside chatter wanted me to believe. I read a book, alongside studying the Scriptures, that gave great advice against strongholds of such thinking…and I’ve encouraged women to cling to a certain verse ever since. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 says, “For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: 4 (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;) Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ”. I’ve learned to cast down my imaginations (inside chatter) against the knowledge of God (untruth). The more we read the Word, the more TRUTH we know and the less lies we believe.
I have struggled with my negative inside chatter for many years. It affects almost everything I do and many of my relationships, especially with my husband. I would love to be able to change my way of thinking. Thank you for sharing your stories to help other women.
I think everyone has to deal with inside chatter especially us women. We always strive to be the best and have everyone like us and if we feel someone doesn’t we play it over and over in our head. Wondering why? Did I do something? Am I not “cool” enough? Especially younger teens. This is why it is so important to raise our daughters with self esteem and always tell them that they are wonderfully made!
I’m getting better at dealing with the inside chatter. Trying to do bible study in the morning, then exercise which seems to give me a more positive outlook to my day and helps me cut back the negative thoughts about myself, my day, what’s going on in my life.
Inside chatter has always been something that has had a huge impact on me. When I was younger it controlled my life because I didn’t know any different. I grew up as a pastors kid and I always had judgements toward me and it eventually started coming from myself. It made it really hard to have any kind of positive outlook on myself. When I read the book unglued it was amazing. It really helped me look at myself and not look at the negative, Of course its taken a lot more then just reading the book but it definitely helped!
Just like with a lot of women, my inside chatter is not always pretty. What I try to remember is that I am a daughter of the King and will always be his princess – this helps me turn that chatter into something more positive.
I have struggled with my negative inside chatter for many years. It affects almost everything I do and many of my relationships, especially with my husband. I would love to be able to change my way of thinking, and have been working very hard at this lately. Thank you for sharing your stories to help other women.
I struggle with inside chatter a lot. On bad days I can even be convinced that God only loves me because He has to love everyone…but I know in my soul that this isn’t correct. I know He loves me. The me He is creating me to be. The me He knew before He formed me in my mother’s womb. I still would like to get to the place where people and situations didn’t shred my confidence, because I immediately defend it with God’s word. I would love to love me as much as He loves me. I’m so glad that He is continuing to work on me!
Thank you, Lysa, for this reminder! This “stinkin’ thinkin’ ” is a problem I struggle with on a daily basis. The Bible verses on notecards idea is one I use alot. I need to be more intentional about praying when I hear the negative voices in my head! “I am loved. I am God’s child. He cares for me. He wants me to live in spiritual victory. I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”…think on these things. Excited about the webcast and the giveaway!
Growing up in a single parent home I was often told that I would never amount to anything and that no man would ever want anyone like me. Through the years I have built up a wall so that no one could get too close because I didn’t want anyone to see what my mom had seen in me. I now know that these were not things she saw in me but how she felt about herself. Somedays these feelings come rushing back and I have to pray that The Lord will give me strength to not believe the hurt of the past but rely on the hope of the future He has planned for me.
I am a OAT, Over active thinker. My mind is always going, if it isn’t on the to do list at home, it’s looking back at how fruitful I was yesterday or how unfruitful I was, etc… My Pastor’s wife and great friend of mine said to me last summer during one of my pitty parties “those who minds are stayed upon the Lord is at perfect peace” Isaiah 26:3 That is God’s word! When we keep our minds upon him we are in perfect peace because God is our peace. When the inside chatter starts I have to stop and ask myself what Philippians 4:8 says Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admmirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things. So when my mind is taking me through past mistakes, or times when my feelings were hurt, or lies from the enemy, or how my co-worker’s complaining is getting on my nerves, I have to stop and ask is this true? is this noble? is this loveing? Yes, People have hurt me in the past, people may get on my nerves but God has called us to love other’s. Prov 29:18 Where there is no vision people, the people perish. I think in the midst of our chatter on the inside we have to see the vision God has set before us. His plans are good for us, whatever the enemy tries to do to us to harm us God promises to turn it around for our good! Those things we must speak and decree and declare and that is when the chatter stops. To God be all the Glory!
When my focus is on Christ, and on serving others then my “inside chatter” tends to be just that – Christ focused. But, when I (almost daily) lose my focus, take my eyes off Christ, that chatter quickly changes to more negative self-focused thoughts. It takes intentional effort to keep my inside chatter in line with my theology.
I’ve learned to listen to the positive inner voices and be aware of the negative inner voices that want to take me down. Thank you for this positive ministry!
My inside chatter changes depending on how often I’m on the word or listening to the Lord instead of my inside chatter. The inside chatter is all lies. I need to get rid of those thoughts and instead quote verses constantly or think of all the blessings that God has given me. I do need to realize that inside chatter many times comes from Satan and I need to stop listening to the lies. Praise God that I am saved!
My inside chatter has been digging a pit for 42 years. When ever God has encouraged me and I have been able to get past some of that brokenness, and I’ve gained some victory, that voice inside will not seem to allow me to enjoy it! As soon as I’m not eating perfectly, exercising for exactly the right amount of burnt calories, basically if I’m not keeping up perfectly with whatever I feel I should be capable of doing “right” by now, those voices tell me I’m a failure, which leads to wrong behavior, depression, anxiety. I have to back to God every single day! Help me Lord to change my thoughts, help me to remember that I am growing spiritually ever day, help me see me the way You see me…etc. yes. It is a daily struggle after a childhood filled with neglect.
Hold my mule…I think I’m gonna shout right now!!! My “Inside Chatter” is going to be the death of me. I’ve learned that she needs to “hush.” Thank you SO much for this quote “Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation”, and this verse “For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, AND YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST,” (Colossians 2: 9-10). I truly feel convicted per my “Inside Chatter” and I am praying for deliverance. Preach Lysa!!!
I was just discussing this with our “Made to Crave” study group yesterday at church. It goes along with what you discuss in the book about how we identify ourselves. I’m trying to learn to not let that “inside chatter” or negative identity get to me or define me. Instead I’m CHOOSING to focus on who I really am…a child of God. I feel as long as I stay in His Word and pray CONSTANTLY then all that negative will start to dissipate.
The enemy is good with his lies and the inside chatter/lies that I allow to run rampant in my head can sometimes paralyze me with immobility to move, impotency to act and inability to see truth. However, the Spirit is who lives IN me (as the enemy does not) reminds me gently of truth. Reminding me Of who I am but more importantly of who God is and I am not bound by my finite mind or capabilities. God wants the unwanted. He used the throw always. He finds worth in me not because of me but because of the work of Christ on the cross that is tattooed on my soul and says I am His.
My Inside Chatter leaves me feeling lonely, unworthy, and useless. I was that girl and sometimes feel like I still am. God’s calling to my heart gives me comfort and strength. He is my true friend, never failing, ever loving.
For me the inside chatter comes from different reasons. I have two beautiful daughters and my youngest has Down Syndrome. I go back and forth with myself a lot about not being a good enough mom for either one of them…that I’m not doing enough, not patient enough, etc. I have to remind myself all the time that God chose me to be their mommy…it’s back and forth all the time.
I have also struggled (and continue to struggle) with inside chatter since I was very young. God revealed to me that this form of self pity (along with other forms) is a sin. You see, when you put so much emphasis on yourself, whether it is good or bad, it is selfish. This inside chatter is putting your focus on yourself and taking it off of our Lord and Savior where it belongs. Psalms 10:4 says In his pride the wicked man does not seek Him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God. It’s easy to think of pride as being boastful and puffed up, but the opposite is also true. Selfish pride is any thoughts that turn our focus on ourselves and away from God. Praise Him for his merciful kindness! May we continue to strive to love Him more.
God bless.
I unfortunately passed the bad habit of listening to the inner chatter to my two beautiful daughters, and now that they are young adults, it rears it’s ugly head quite often. I need them to learn freedom so they can fully walk in all that God has for their lives!!! And one way to do that is for me to find freedom in Christ – that they can then see the path to freedom! Thank you!
This is my first time to read your blog. I got the link from Proverbs 31 Ministries. I have “inside chatter” going on quite often. And I just have to remind myself that it is not from God. I liked your blog and will read it more. Thanks!
I’ve struggled with negative chatter my whole life. I continue to pray for peace and be shown my worth. What I’ve learned to date is just how destructive this truly is and joe easy is is to allow it to destroy you. I struggle each day but now have a loving Savior by my side. I go to Him when my chatter starts.
As much as I’d like to deny it, I still battle “inside chatter”… I AM older now, and will “take every thought captive” but I can’t say they don’t try to creep in…… I will correct myself, but truly am looking forward to the day when it stops more than it starts…. I notice it’s more so in some areas of my life than others…. 🙂
I think we all have in some form or fashion inside chatter. Sometimes I let it take me the wrong direction. That is something I have to really work on. Sometimes though I think it can be good. It can nag at you when you need to help someone or just be the listening ear when someone needs to talk instead of just running away from the situation. When that happens I feels it’s God’s chatter in my ear telling me what to do.
I am working on my seven yr. old sons destructive internal chatter that becomes external (thankfully). I need to learn what God says about how to handle those thoughts. One of my favorites is “take every thought captive..”
I’ve struggled with negative chatter my whole life. What I’ve learned to date is just how destructive this truly is and how easy it is to allow it to destroy you. I struggle each day but now have a loving Savior by my side. I go to Him when my chatter starts.
I have tried to utilize a mental “stop”…when I have those feelings of insecurity, self-doubt, and dare, I say self-loathing, I picture God holding up his hand and telling me to seek peace and to “be still.”
When life gets hectic and I don’tmake time to spend time with the Lord and pray, I find that my inside chatter is constant. It’s harder for me to quiet those voices and negative thoughts. The Lord is so good to remind me how worthy I am and how much he loves me!
Negative self talk……something I have been dealing with for so long! Why do we allow ourselves to talk about us like this! I would not let someone else talk about me this way!
Last spring I went through a study on Biblical thinking. I was what I needed. I think I need to continuously go through the notes from that study. One thing I learned was to write (on a 3 x 5 card) a verse ~ a promise from God ~ that tells you the truth about the lie that you are telling yourself. Each time you find yourself struggling with negative self talk, pull that verse out of your pocket and read it aloud to yourself. Pray that God will give you the strength to remember who you are in Him. You are a daughter of the King of Kings!
I am looking forward to hearing more about this struggle tomorrow night. It is good to know I am not alone.
I know this chatter has affected me over the years and affects young girls and women of ages. Thank you Lisa for all that you do in helping us address the real issues.
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. Deep down I know how valueable I am to God but I can be pretty harsh to myself. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am my true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. Fantasize about God coming through for me then he will be on the throne of my heart. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” Praise God because I am making imperfect progress! Thank you Lysa for your transparency, honesty, and I look forward to seeing you at Women of Faith in Henderson in May!
Thank you for addressing this struggle. I do struggle with inside chatter and have found that during these times I have to run to the Lord. If I listen to it and buy into the lies then it is like it gets in between the Lord and I, as I distance myself and feel unworthy of His love, so if I run to Him immediately and ask for His help and His truth then I can mentally fight against the chatter and extinguish the flaming darts.
I am learning to be more aware of my inside chatter and stop it in it’s tracks. I turn my thoughts around by replacing them with positives, telling myself that it’s just Satan’s lies, reading the Bible or devotionals, etc.
My negative chatter has been busy these last few days. Friday I got a call from my divorce attorney saying Mediation had been set for February, Saturday was my 11th wedding anniversay (which I spent home alone) Only to pick up my children on Sunday to the chatter of how much fun they had with their dad and his girl friend over the weekend. I’ve always felt rejected by my mother, my father was never in my life, my husband has rejected me, and eventhough I know it’s a lie I was feeling rejected by my own children. Please pray with me to get a control of these thoughts to know and FEEL God has not and will not reject me, and he has such a wonderful plan for my life despite my current circumstances.
What I’ve learned to date is just how destructive this is. I struggle each day but now have a loving Savior by my side. I go to Him when my chatter starts.
One important thing I’ve learned about ‘inside chatter’ is that satan is RELENTLESS!! And how important it is to stay plugged-in/abiding in Gods word and His truths of who we are, and that other humans – friends, family and spouses are NOT our enemy! Thank you Lysa for sharing this and for being genuine and transparent!! I LOVE the reminder that “I can’t/shouldn’t put the whole of my identity in the smallness of a situation.”
Negativity has been in my life since the day I was born. I was raised in the most negative family you could possibly dream of. I know that the inisde chatter I hear reflects words I’ve heard my whole life. I am not a negative person, I always try to be positive and people who don’t know me on a personal level would never imagine the inside chatter that I fight daily. I am tired of fighting the negative voices – you know, the ones that tell me that I am not good enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough, I’ll never be any better than I am right now. I want to conquer it once and for all!
I have learned that I the more I am in the Work the less of my chattering I hear. When He and HIs Word are my focus my chatter changes for the good. As a mom, I am also learning that the chatter inside my head often spills out onto my children, and those repercussions affect the chatter inside of their heads.
Inside chatter – we as women are constantly thinking and talking to ourselves. Key phrases: complain & remain; praise and be raised; attitude of gratitude. Unfortunately my inside chatter is like a roller coaster but I know with God’s help I can keep it positive. Loved Unglued!
I have a horrible time with “inside chatter”. Constant negativity. Always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Trying to focus on how Big my God is and not how Big my problems seem…I just wish there was a switch I could turn off.
For me inside chatter can ruin my entire day. It sometimes pops out of nowhere and I have to pray it away.
I never had a healthy self-esteem as a child. I had a hereditary jaw problem that was eventually operated on. My parents fought loudly until they divorced and I learned to self-medicate with food. I was never the pretty one of my group of friends and always thought others were better than me. I yearned for the world’s approval. It wasn’t until well into adulthood that I truly believed that my worth came from God. I still struggle with …they’re not talking to me, I don’t fit in, … but I know that when I worship regularly, it puts me in a better mind set. I’m so proud of my daughter. When issues me up at school where she is excluded, I have asked her if those girls are nice girls, if they make her feel good to be around them. She says no. I’ve taught her that popular means exclusive, not so nice behavior most of the time and she should focus on friendships that are supportive and kind. She has a best friend now and it is so wonderful to hear them together. I actually hear them saying things like, “You’re awesome. No, you’re awesome!”. :). That has to help with the negative self chatter!
I will be using your quote “don’t put the whole if your identity into the smallness if the situation” I will be passing it in to all the hurting and struggling girls I come in contact with. Thank you Lysa and Sheila!! You are both such blessings!!!
Inside Chatter…wow you hit the nail on the head with that one. I have struggled & fought with this for so long. Being a pastor’s wife seems to have added to it. Friendships are difficult and where to fit in is a constant challenge. After 8 years, I’m realizing that I need to work on the relationships that are worth working on….my relationship with the Lord and those friends who really, truly care. Looking forward to the webcast! Can’t wait!!
Inside chatter – We all go through things in life and we all have different things that drag us down. For me, words spoken by my family & friends have a great effect on me, especially the negative ones. I don’t know why I keep letting them have this effect on me. I’ve noticed that inside chatter not only affects you on the inside, it changes who you are on the outside, too. So, no matter how many times I hear the words “You weren’t chosen.” there’s always another voice that says “I’ve chosen you, You are Mine!” and that helps me to conquer my inside chatter & to feel safe in His arms, in His presence. Thanks for this post Lysa!
My inside chatter is often not my friend!
I too struggle with the inside chatter, the theme of most of it is that awful “F” word, failure. The insecurities I have about what people think of me are extremely deep and have been since I was in my early teens. The failure of not being good enough, not saying the right things, not doing enough to make them like me, it goes on and on. The story you recalled was me on more times than I can count and I ALWAYS wanted to FIT in. I’m now in a place in my life that the inside chatter is mostly negative about things I’ve said or done and how embarassed it’s made me feel. When those thoughts start to happen, I pray ” a mind controlled by the spirit is peace and life”. Reminding myself that I am a new creation and that the Lord is in control, if I let Him. The opinion of others doesn’t seem to hold up to the opinion my Father has of me.
I’m in the midst of reading Unglued. It’s given me many moments of “I totally get that” and whispering “that’s me”. I appreciate your writing and your daily encouragement.
Some days I can tune out that inside chatter….some days it seems it is all I can hear. I need to be reminded WHO I am and WHOSE I am! Thanks!
Needed this today! I continually have to remind myself that I am not the label that I think I am, I am a princess of the king, I am loved and desired by Him.
So many defining moments/ events that I’m working through…divorce, failure…etc. some days I just get tired of the battle yet I know the importance if speaking the truth to myself.
Thank you for that verse. So many times I seek out my identity in how others feel about me rather than recognizing that I am already whole in Christ. My identity is in Him alone!
Oh thank You for that post today! You hit the chatter in my head with a hammer and nailed the negativity that was going on up there. How in the world do I let those simple little moments grow and grow until they take over and not only define the situation but define who I am and how I treat others as well. So totally not what God intended but surely what the Enemy intends. Reading the other posts it looks like this “infection” in our heads knows no boundaries. It is effecting the young, the older, the single person, married, with or without child. Cannot wait for the webcast!!! Lysa do not ever ever wonder if your words are significant to anyone other than yourself…..they most definitely are! Keep it coming Girlfriend and we will try to keep up with you.
Inside chatter has become more destructive as I have gathered more roles in life. Satan uses my responsibilities as leverage as he whispers “you could be a better wife” or “you’re a terrible mother.” It hurts me more when the way I love/care for/treat my family is attacked. The great news is, like these other ladies have shared, the more in tune I am with God the less I struggle with Satan’s lies. Deciphering God’s voice is absolutely possible for His children as John 10:4 points out “And when he putteth forward his own sheep, he goeth before them, and the sheep follow him: for they know his voice.”
I’ve learned that it’s ok to get bossy with myself and INSIST that I focus on truth instead of my flesh! God’s word is truth. My flesh is whiney 🙂
2012 was full of inside chatter…I just can’t listen to it anymore. So in 2013 I will not!
I allowed it to convince me of things that I knew really were not true and it turn I was not fun to be around, but when it starts now I turn to Jesus to block that garbage out.
I think inside chatter happens to every women and I know with me personally it has tempted me to “hide” inside myself, not try new things or step out of my comfort zone. I really feel like it is Satan making his way into our lives. I try now to listen to God more and trust in his love and grace to help me when I doubt myself. I am always good enough in God’s eyes!
Oh, the many thoughts that tumble through my head in one day! Are they mine? Are they evil penetrating darts from our enemy? Are they fleeting ideas, vain and uninspiring? And why oh why do I listen to them when it only leads to negetivity, discontentment, and even sin. It’s because I am not firmly rooted in the Love of Christ. The Lord gives me power, love, and a sound mind.(2Tim 1:7) I have the mind of Christ (1Cor 2:16). Anything else I choose to hear and believe is a lie. Lies are straight from hell and I certainly don’t want to go there! I am a seed of righteousness and filled with the Truth in Jesus!
My inside chatter is my own negative thoughts of not being good enough or pretty enough. I am my own worst enemy… everyone else accepts me the way I am, so why can’t I.. I must reprogram my inside chatter to reflect the positive and what God thinks about me, not what anyone else thinks about me.
Can’t wait for the webcast!!! I ignore the inside chatter . I turn on Klove & just sing along with the music …
One important thing I’ve learned about ‘inside chatter’ is that satan is RELENTLESS!! And how important it is to stay plugged-in/abiding in Gods word and His truths of who we are, and that other humans – friends, family and spouses are NOT our enemy!
Inside chatter? It is something I have always struggled with. Now that I’m a pastor’s wife it seems to have intensified. I know it’s the enemy’s way of attacking to cause doubt and stir up discord. Even though I know that inside chatter is lies of the enemy and that the Truth of God’s grace and purpose for my life prevails, I’m still a girl who battles.
What I’ve learned about the inside chatter is that it is an attempt by Satan to keep me from believing the things that I know are true about me. I didn’t even realize I was doing it, but I have been believing lies – I’m not smart enough, I’m not loved, I’m never going to be good enough. Why would I believe this when I know God says the exact opposite about me?! My own inner dialogue has been far more harmful to me, than anything that anyone else could ever say about me, BUT I am consciously working to squash those negative thoughts, and replace them with truth. 🙂
My negative chatter has been very loud lately. I haven’t quite figured out how to combat it – but it usually ends with a phone call to my husband who helps to reassure me. And now I’m beginning to watch our daughters with the same internal conflicts – I wish I had all the right answers for them.
Inside Chatter- has to be combatted with God’s truth. Also we have to stop assuming the worst about ourselves and others.
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. Deep down I know how valueable I am to God but I can be pretty harsh to myself. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am. My true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. Trust in the Lord with all my heart and in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” Praise God because I am making imperfect progress! Thank you Lysa for your transparency, honesty, and I look forward to seeing you at Women of Faith in Henderson in May!
As much as I would like to say I have retrained myself from this thinking, I’m human. I have to make a conscious choice each time, asking God to help overcome the lies. Simply put garbage in, garbage out. Or another, what are you going to fill your cup/glass with? I think many of us need this reminder. Sometimes daily, other times, hour to hour.
As a foster momma on adoption #4 I’m under several microscopes. Everyone & they’re case worker has a say in my parenting & an opinion of me based on a stack of paperwork. I have to dive into His word daily & swim in the truth that I was chosen & He is at work in & through me despite my faults & flaws. We are who God says we are; beloved.
I’ve learned a good deal about negative chatter. The main thing: it will take me places that were never meant for me to go. Negative chatter tries to make me believe (and sometimes does) things that never happened and were never said. Positive chatter (pure, truth, love–all things captive to the obedience of Christ) is much healthier and promotes good within my heart and mind, which produces good out of my mouth.
Can’t wait for tomorrow night!
Rebecca
Every time I try to talk ugly to myself, inside or not, I stop myself and turn it into something positive. Instead of ‘I’m so fat and awful’, it is ‘Michaelangelo eat your heart out’. Instead of ‘you idiot you are going to be late’, it is ‘relax, G-d may be working a miracle right now.’ And so on. It doesn’t take long to get into a habit of self love. Most of the time we do this to ourselves we are anxious, which comes from a place of fear, which is separate from G-d. More love, more G-d, less fear, less anxiety, less self hate. G-d bless, oooo
I am hoping that I will be able to change my Inside Chatter. It seems like I can encourage those around me, but when it comes to myself, I can’t think of anything positive to say!
What I have learned from inside chatter is that I still have far to go to overcome it. I need to be looking to God for help instead of letting the voices overrule!! At times that makes me feel like a failure but realize we are “imperfect works in progress” and I need to just keep pushing forward…perseverance. Down with the negative chatter 🙂
Still have negative chatter….but working on it!
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. Deep down I know how valueable I am to God but I can be pretty harsh to myself. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am. My true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. Trust in the Lord with all my heart and in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” I am making imperfect progress! Thank you Lysa for your transparency, honesty, and I look forward to seeing you at Women of Faith in Henderson in May!
WOW!! This really hits me today. I too, as many have stated, was the girl that didn’t get picked. I’m not really sure why I still remember that incident so vividly, when later in life I realized I didn’t really like the girls that didn’t pick me, but never the less, I still remember how I felt. Even to this day, I sometime hear this inside chatter, but have realized when I do, if I go straight to Christ, the chatter goes away. We’re all human, and this “chatter” will never really go away and stay away, the trick is to just take this problem like all the other to Christ for Him to direct us in the direction that will help us.
One important thing I’ve learned about ‘inside chatter’ is that satan is RELENTLESS!! And how important it is to stay plugged-in/abiding in Gods word and His truths of who we are, and that friends, family and spouses are NOT our enemy!
I’m learning, with inside chatter, to pay attention to the thoughts that are running through my mind, rather than allow them to roam freely and rampantly. Not necessarily so that I can believe them, but rather so that, if they are negative, lies, or contrary to Biblical truth, I can take them captive and replace them with truth (and specific Biblical truth if applicable).
I think my inside chatter is the enemy trying to pick at my insecurites. The more that I try to focus on the positive chatter the negative gets, rather, attempts to get a little louder. Thats when I allow the song of my heart to get louder and I begin to praise God more.
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. Deep down I know how valueable I am to God but I can be pretty harsh to myself. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am. My true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. Trust in the Lord with all my heart and in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” I am making imperfect progress!
I was so happy to read this post today and can’t wait to hear more! I have always struggled with inside chatter and it has always come in waves. I am currently in the middle of a struggle with it and am really trying to just give it all to God, He is the only one who can work on me and my thoughts, I know, but my stubborness won’t seem to let me let go of it completely.
Wow-what a timely and much needed word from God! It amazes me how much these thoughts creep into my head. The need to be included, to feel love and accepted by those around us, takes up too many hours of my life! Thank you for this wonderful reminder!
It’s hard not to listen to the inside chatter. If I immediately turn over my thoughts & ask Christ to take them captive, it turns off all that negative inside chatter 🙂
What a great topic to battle w/ big guns, yourself AND Sheila Walsh! I have been working on quieting and effectively listening to my insider chatter since going thru Unglued, i.e. the gentle noticing…I have become MORE aware, and am now taking the necessary steps to discern and effectively transform my mind with His word with what I am hearing! Looking forward to hearing/seeing you speak THIS Friday evening Bayside, Roseville, CA!
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am. My true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. Trust in the Lord with all my heart and in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” I am making imperfect progress!
Oh thank you so very much for this post. I am not alone in feeling this way. I too need to remember that God loves me.
I do struggle at times with inside chatter. Sometimes it can lead you in the wrong direction if you let it. Sometimes, however, it can be good. I feel the chatter that is good is God’s voice telling me to help someone or just be there for them.
Yes, I want to hear what you have to say about that “inside chatter”! Thanks for the great webcast and giveaways!
sometimes we have to keep taking TO ourselves instead of listening to ourselves. we don’t understand people or reasoning…and we have to be ok that sometimes…even though it is no fun…that we are not included. there is just so much that we cannot see! this is an AWESOME giftpack and i am sooooooo hoping to win! have been hearing so much about all of your books and have been wanting to get them!! 🙂
The enemy never tires in his relentless efforts to infiltrate our minds and hearts with his endless lies and deception. He only has one goal in mind and that is to make us ineffective for the Kingdom of God…not only that but he wants us to be ineffective wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, and friends. We lose focus watching and listening to the enemy that our guard is let down and the enemy strikes. Too many times we actually keep our eyes on the enemy and just acknowledge God…We need to reverse this mindset and we must acknowledge our enemy, but keep our eyes on GOD. 1 Peter 5:8 Be sober, be vigilant, because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.
I love your ministry and your genuineness of heart for helping women. Our Father’s heart and love is shown through your ministry and that ignites a desire for those who don’t know Him to come to know Him and those who do to only draw closer.
Thank you, Emma
I learned today about Inside Chatter!!
Not only do I suffer from this negative inside chatter but I fail to let the positive inside chatter out. I have wisdom & much to share but when given the opportunity to share I freeze or often get so emotional that I keep it bottled up. I pray NOT for Self-confidence but rather for God-Confidence, that the Holy Spirit will intercede on my behalf, that I will get out of my head, get out of the way to shine the bright light of Christ. I will pray for the fellow Sisters in Christ here to be built up in God-Confidence, as well. God Bless & many blessings to all. Thank you for offering this web-cast I plan to tune in.
I’ve noticed more about My inside chatter because I am aware of my Children’s inside chatter. I tell them to not let it bother them, to pray for their enemies, to rely fully on God & then I’m forced to look at my own life – Does my life relfect what I’m teaching my children?
I love these posts and I adore how, as Christian women, we are able to lean on each other to remind each other how best to live Godly lives to be the best wives/mothers/women we can be and to minister to others by the standards we choose to live by and display.
Thank you for allowing God to work through you! I look forward to the webcast. Thanks, again!
Inside chatter or stinking thinking makes me think and do things that I wouldn’t normally do or think. I can sit down, look back, and realize what caused me to spiral in the first place. Unfortunately, it doesn’t take much. I’m learning to change the ‘tape’ of the inside chatter and focus on the truth of who God says I am and what I meant to Him.
Inside chatter will eat you alive if you allow it to. You must call on the name of Jesus and ask Him to bound those thoughts up and do away with them. That inside chatter is Satan just trying to steal your joy. Call on the power of Jesus!
I’ve learned to tune out the “chatter” by reaching out to a friend and putting my focus on her, not my own insecurities. Spending time with a friend soothes the bruised spirit. I have 3 very close girlfriends that always pick me up. They send me to the word and often will send the scripture via text or email. I know God put them in my life for just this. I love to be that “sounding board” for them too. It’s amazing, we are not all down in the dumps at the same time, usually it’s just one of us and the other 3 pull us out of the pit. I love mi amigos!
I think we all tend to go through times in our life where we listen to the ‘inside chatter’! We take others opinions and the way they make us feel and use them to define who we are! Really we need to be looking to our Heavely Father and seeking to see how He sees us, that is through the finished work of the cross~Grace!!
Thank you!! Jesus Reigns!!
Inside chatter or stinking thinking makes me think and do things that I wouldn’t normally do or think. I can sit down, look back, and realize what caused me to spiral in the first place. Unfortunately, it doesn’t take much. I’m learning to change the ‘tape’ of the inside chatter and focus on the truth of who God says I am and what I mean to Him.
God is good! There are always other parties and more important people who want you to be part of their lives;)
I’ve struggled with this all my life and I’ve learned that I have to spend time with God in His Word and through prayer, as well as scripture memorization, to help me through times of negative inside chatter and remember God’s plan for my life.
My in side chatter is very negative. I have always had a poor view of myself and the only way I get past it is reading the Bible and going to God in prayer. Lysa Terkeurst you devotionals have always have helped to know exactly where in the Bible to look when the “inside chatter” is taking is bringing me down.
I have always evaluated any relationship and situation in my life and if it falls apart I am quick to assume it is my fault, always questioning why. Overcoming my self worth has been something I have been trying to work on and praying for. Looking forward to the webcast
I have had this so many times in my life. Now when it happens I say to myself, God Loves Me!!! Get away from me Satan. This does help!
It’s hard not to listen to the inside chatter. If I immediately turn over my thoughts & ask Christ to take them captive, it turns off all that negative inside chatter!
I call it self-talk, but inside chatter works too. I went through a very hard time last year, inside myself, and it seemed I was constantly telling myself, “I just can’t do this, I can’t go on.” I experienced bouts of anger and sadness like I had never felt before. And no, I wasn’t going through menopause (my first thought). I went on antidepressants and finally those words were gone, but when I got off the medicine, it seemed like I had to fight harder to keep myself positive. I have learned that when I start feeling that way, if I will begin to praise God for all His goodness in my life, and mentally start listing all the good things He has done for me and my family, those words go away and are replaced by praise. I have found that the best inside chatter, is the chatter with God, praising Him and letting Him change the things in me that need to be changed. When I feel angry, I try to focus on the good things that are in my life. If I am aggravated at my children (I have a 22 year old, a 20 year old and 2-16 year olds, along with all their wives and boyfriends) I begin to thank God for them and I find I am not quite so aggravated. Sometimes I forget but the Holy Spirit is good to prompt me!!
I struggle with inside chatter that tells me how I am failing, what I have failed at, how often I fail…… You’ll NEVER get it right. I have to hold those thoughts captive immediately before they grow exponentially in size and swallows me up into darkness. And more often than not, I don’t realize it has happened. Only when I am diligently walking with and seeking The Lord, I have ears ready to listen to the Holy Spirit guide me away from the inside chatter. Guiding me to the truth of who I am in Christ, truth that burns away the lies.
Inside Chatter…. I have listened to this too much in the past! What I have been learning ids that the inside chatter is not GOD speaking to you! And you must take comfort in what GOD wants you to hear! This is a daily battle between you and that inside evil voice trying to drag us down. Let’s listen to GOD!
I love that you called the situation with the girls at school smal,l because that is what it is in the grand scheme of things. When it is happening it seems really big so I wish I would have been able to think of it like that back then. I’m sure I have been on both sides of Inside Chatter and as I get older I realize that who I am socializing with has alot to do with how I act and it is very easy to get caught up in the negativity. With God’s help, I am working on this and I hope that as my 5 year old son grows, I I hope that can have the wisdom and the words to help him through these types of situations.
‘Inside Chatter’ it sounds like something I should be listening to and learning from! I would LOVE to win this package and become involved with the webcast!!
I struggle with inside chatter that tells me how I am failing, what I have failed at, how often I fail…… You’ll NEVER get it right. I have to hold those thoughts captive immediately before they grow exponentially in size and swallows me up into darkness. Only when I am diligently walking with and seeking The Lord, I have ears ready to listen to the Holy Spirit guide me away from the inside chatter. Guiding me to the truth of who I am in Christ, truth that burns away the lies.
This has been a challenge for me, but I know with God’s guidance it’s something I can overcome. This chatter undermines my belief in myself as God’s child. It’s the devil’s way to try to make me feel that “I’m not good enough”, that God or other people can’t love me. I won’t let him win!
God is good! There are always other parties and more important people who want you to be part of their lives!!
I put pressure on myself to be perfect. Giving way for the head chatter to grow and take up residency. 1 Corinthians 1:26-31 gives me permission not to be perfect and proves to me that God designed me with flaws intentionally. I am embracing that and am taking control over the head chatter, yes there are still days it wins but they are less.
In Matthew 4:1-11 Jesus modeled for us how we should handle confrontation with the enemy of our souls – HEAD CHATTER!! The word of God – every circumstance we face with can go to the bible and find the answer. I find that the more I do studies with other women and listen and learn from them, when the head chatter is going on, a verse or a song will pop in and override the storm.
I deal with negative inside chatter on a daily basis. As if I didn’t have low self-esteem on my on my husband has made me have no self esteem at all. I struggle on a daily basis just to get out of bed and do what needs to be done. Hopefully this webcast will help me to deal with this negativity towards myself.
I’m learning that inside chatter is not worth listening to. it comes when I feel the most vulnerable, and when I am the most easily persuaded. The only way to combat inside chatter is to know the Word of God so that’s what I hear instead!
I’m so glad I heard about this webcast!! I’m a wife and mother of 4 (ages 8, 6, 4, and 5 weeks). Most days I get so busy that the inside chatter is normal in my life – I’m so used to hearing I don’t bother to crush it! I don’t even realize all the negativity that I’m not only hurting myself with but my family with as well!! One thing I know for sure – words and thoughts have power!! Unfortunately – I forget to pay attention to the words and thoughts that I’m giving power to!!!
Can’t wait for the webcast….much needed! My husband and children are thanking you already!!!
I had so many negative thoughts about myself after the birth of my daughter. I came to realize that these thoughts are the work of evil in our lives. I come from a very conservative religious background so I wasn’t always comfortable thinking about evil or mentioning the devil. I find that saying back (in my head lest others think I’m crazy) “these thoughts at not from God” and sometimes even “back off Satan” is a good way to stop the negative chatter.
God is good! There are always other parties and more important people who want you to be part of their lives!! Keep praying for acceptance!!
I deal with negative inside chatter on a daily basis. As if I didn’t have low self-esteem on my own my husband has made me have no self esteem at all. I struggle on a daily basis just to get out of bed and do what needs to be done. Hopefully this webcast will help me to deal with this negativity towards myself.
I struggle with inside chatter that tells me how I am failing…… You’ll NEVER get it right. I have to hold those thoughts captive before they grow exponentially in size and swallow me. Only when I am diligently walking with and seeking The Lord, I have ears ready to listen to the Holy Spirit guide me away from the inside chatter. Guiding me to the truth of who I am in Christ, truth that burns away the lies.
Inside Chatter can make a person go crazy…or at least feel like it! :-/ I think if I can just remind myself to pray and continually be in constant communication with God then this mindless inside chatter wouldn’t get to me so bad. It’s easy to tell yourself lies and then kind of wallow in the feelings that you are feeling at certain moments; but if you are talking with God, then the chatter seems almost silly, because we know that God can see through it. I’m SO glad we serve a God who truly understands us even when we are at our weakest and that we can be COMPLETELY found in Him, and that we are enough, because we are made in His image! 🙂 Thanks for sharing and allowing God to speak through you!
~Sarah
I think my inside chatter had multiple personalities. Kind of like the angel and devil on the shoulders of Tom from Tom and Jerry. I so badly want and need to be a good Daughter to Our Father but I struggle so hard to keep on track. I read my Bible regularly, but I long to be closer to Him. Thank you for offering these books to your readers. I hope I’ll be able to afford these books soon so I can use them to help me on my journey.
I memorized Psalm 139 when I was in High School… Helps me to focus on WHO’S I am and not worry so much about what others think (or don’t) of me!!
That inside chatter can be so damaging! I know for myself there are times when I can overcome it but other times it’s so hard to drown out :/ I have noticed it with my daughter too and she’s only 7! Yikes! So we have talked about where that voice comes from and who it really is trying to steal our joy. I pray that working on this now with her will help her in her journey throughout this earthly life. She gets it, but it’s still hard to overcome, for all of us! The awesome thing is that HE has already overcome it! We just need to find ourselves in Him and rest in His peace <3
Looking forward to the webcast!!!
Inside chatter seems to be pretty negative most of the time for me. It is so hard to turn it off and it all starts with one little thing just not turning out the way I think it should. The more I dig into God’s Word & read His truths the easier it is to tune out the negative chatter with positive scriptures.
I’m a wife and mother of 4 (ages 8, 6, 4, and 5 weeks). Most days I get so busy that the inside chatter is normal in my life – I’m so used to hearing I don’t bother to crush it! I don’t even realize all the negativity that I’m not only hurting myself with but my family with as well!! One thing I know for sure – words and thoughts have power!! Unfortunately – I forget to pay attention to the words and thoughts that I’m giving power to!
The inside chatter is constantly on at full volume in my head at all times, but there are times when I surrender to God and just dwell in His peace and then the inside chatter is quieted for a time.
I am still learning to change the inside chatter from negative to positive and would love to win this prize!! I am currently reading Becoming More than a Good Bible Study Girl and really enjoying it. Love you Lysa!!
I like the comment: “It was a moment. And moments shift. People are fickle. People shift.” One thing I had to learn in school and remind myself even now is that sometimes it’s not about me. I would get (and sometimes still do!) so down if someone didn’t respond the way I thought they should or if they seemed “mad at me”, or I would stress that everyone was looking at me and seeing me in a certain light…but the reality is that other people’s lives do not revolve around me! Once I realized that, I became less bothered if someone didn’t smile at me just right or whatever!
As a homeschooling mama, the Inside Chatter can be so subtle, nagging at me that certain things need to be accomplished. If I am not careful in remembering who I am serving, and that HIS agenda is the one I need to be following, that chatter will make me become “Unglued”. 🙂
we have to learn to talk to ourselves instead of listen to ourselves a lot of the time. although it is no fun to be excluded sometimes…there are SO many things that we cannot see or understand…but God can.
this is a great gift pack! have been hearing so much about you and your ministry and books…soooooooo hoping to win so that i can check these out and share them with friends!!
“Inside chatter” is alive, especially in today’s world. We have so much information that it’s hard not to replay what we’ve read, heard, seen, etc. over and over in our minds. This turns into us, as women, transplanting it into our own lives and thoughts. Thus, the “inside chatter” begins. It’s very difficult at times to turn off. It’s also something that girls pick up at a very young age. It’s hard watching my daughters stuggle with their sel-confidence and I think most of it comes from their inner thoughts 🙁
I’m a wife and mother of 4 (ages 8, 6, 4, and 5 weeks). I get so busy that the inside chatter is normal in my life – I’m so used to hearing I don’t bother to crush it! I don’t even realize all the negativity that I’m not only hurting myself with but my family with as well!! One thing I know for sure – words and thoughts have power! I forget to pay attention to the words and thoughts that I’m giving power to!
Inside chatter that is negative needs to be changed like changing a radio station. We need to tune in to what our Father says. He LOVES us, he DIED for us, FORGIVES us. He WANTS us! We have been adopted by our amazing creator, he does not create junk! <3
I have learned that it is important to listen to my “inside chatter” to see if it is coming from negative or dramatic or false sources or if it is coming from the truth from God.God’s truth sets my “inside chatter” right!
Being a homeschool Mom being consistent can be very challenging. The smallest little turn in the day can throw the kids focus down the drain. So many things get in the way of being consistent but it seems like the insider chatter never gets interrupted. Why is that? Many people see the outside of a homeschool family (the joy, flexibility and benefits) and by pass the difficulty that comes along with it. If I don’t guard my heart carefully the enemy knows just when and how to seep in those negative chattering thoughts that can become my focus. Usually where ones thoughts are focused is how ones actions are displayed. Thankfully I can stop my day at any given moment regroup my focus on the Lord and start my day again causing the enemy to flee from my children and I. Thank you for writing this to remind me that moments do not identify me or my day!
I’m a wife and mother of 4. I get so busy that the inside chatter is normal in my life – I’m so used to hearing I don’t bother to crush it! I don’t realize all the negativity that I’m not only hurting myself with but my family with as well!! One thing I know for sure – words and thoughts have power! I forget to pay attention to the words and thoughts that I’m giving power to!
I fight negative inside chatter every single day. I am constantly reminding myself that it does not come from the Lord.
Inside chatter is a daily struggle for me. I have to keep reminding myself that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I have been chosen by God! I am HIS child.
I’ve learned to use 2 Cor. 10: 4 & 5…”For the weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh and blood], but they are mighty before God for the overthrow and destruction of strongholds, [Inasmuch as we] refute arguments and theories and reasonings and every proud and lofty thing that sets itself up against the [true] knowledge of God; and we lead every thought and purpose away captive into the obedience of Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One),” And Phil. 4:8…”For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].” If the inside chatter does not line up with these two passages, I choose to boot it out like a bouncer at a doorway!
In the sermon yesterday by Sunder Krishnan, he noted that one of the symptoms of ‘living by our wits and not God’s wisdom’ is a series of imaginary dialogues with others’. And, yes, we all have that inside chatter fueled many times by thoughts interjected by Satan (read Screwtape Letters). If the inside chatter leads us to a blanket feeling of unworthiness, we can rest assured it is not of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit speaks to us of specific sins to be dealt with. When we were rejected for ministry many years ago, the label, “You’re not even fit for God’s work”, worked its way into defining me and my functioning dwindled into ‘unfit for anything’. I am still battling this. In recently completing Emotionally Healthy Spirituality, I started reading again Practicing the Presence of God with The Daily Office. The only way for me to stop this toxic flow is to worship Him with music and the truth of His Word. But what a battle for my mind there is.
As Sunder said, in my own strength, using ‘my own wits’, I fail miserably, but by allowing His Presence to continually invade my life in music, prayer and reading, there is clarity and freedom.
Inside chatter — sometimes it is a ROARING CROWD — but I am learning to not let my WHO be determined by my do or by the inside chatter — focus on WHO HE is and WHO I am through HIM — not where I want to be, but not where I used to be either!!!! Joshua 1:9
Inside chatter almost destroyed my marriage. Until I read Unglued…..I honestly didn’t realize I was listening to so much inside chatter. I just had a baby and I was inside chattering with myself enough that I was convinced that my husband thought I was a terrible mom. I spent many nights awake in the nursery crying while my baby slept sick that he was trying to take my baby and leave some day. It was ALL me being ridiculous. We’ve talked and prayed and now three months later we are better than ever.
Ive learned about inside chatter. You are a blessing and I look forward to growing in my relationship with the Lord through your inspiration.
It’s funny how when those moments happen especially as a young child or teenager it seems as though your whole world is falling apart! Looking back you can see it as such a small part like you said a moment in the scheme of ours lives! But when dissappointments come or those feelings of failure or unworthiness, those moments come back to your memory! It’s so important not to let them take over again!
My daughter is battling cancer for a second time. As you can imagine, I have had to ask God daily to help me “take captive every thought”. While our prognosis is good, and I know God is with us, it only seems to encourage the enemy to plant “seeds of weeds” in my mind! I have to take time to unearth these seeds before they take root! My weed killer is the Word of God! “Washing with water through the word”! (Eph. 5:26)
I struggle with inside chatter from being left out of friends’ events. I have been struggling off and on with cancer for almost 3 years. For a while now, my friends make plans and forget to invite me – or I get an awkward sympathy invite when I ask if they have plans. They usually respond with “we would have invited you, but we thought you’d say no.” Regardless, it’s nice to know I was thought of and to have the choice myself.
Recently, I had to shut out chatter when I found out I was not invited to a college friend’s wedding this summer. Just a couple years ago we were holding college group in our apartments, sharing dinners, and going out for late night fun together. Now, I’m not even considered as a wedding guest. It doesn’t matter because I am who I am in Christ, but it is still sometimes hard to keep it out.
It seems that Negative “Inside Chatter” affects nearly every woman Young or Old. It can be difficult… yes almost impossible to stop when you let yourself listen to the ongoing ramblings of self doubt and feelings of being unwanted, unliked, or forgotten. I have learned and am STILL learning that the best way to Silence the Negative is to focus on the positive. This is done best through Gods word. Knowing Who we are in Him so that we don’t get so wrapped up with Who we are with or without “them”. It doesn’t mean that things won’t still hurt a little but that you’ll be able to brush it off because you will know that these things are not a Big deal but instead are teeny tiny situations that days, months, or years from now will not matter. Knowing Who I am in Him. That’s how I’m trying to diminish my “Inside Chatter”.
It’s so hard not to listen to the inside chatter. But when I ask God to take captive my thoughts, He helps take away all that negative inside chatter!
From the beginning of your post I knew it was just what I needed to hear today. Looking forward to the webcast for further help with inside chatter. Thanks for the opportunity.
Girls are mean to each other. I think I may have been mean myself on more than one occasion, even knowing what it felt like to be excluded. Now, that God has taught me to “grow up”, I throw myself out there to the wolves. I try to be a new persons first friend. I will smile at everyone. And just try to make everyone feel comfortable wherever they are. Even if I’m the one who’s visiting. 🙂
I have learned that if the “chatter” inside my brain makes me feel uneasy that it certainly isn’t from God, but Satan. I can’t always ignore it, but I’m getting better at it!
The “inside chatter” has always plagued me. Growing up very shy, my 2 older sisters made me feel ugly, “nerdy”, never good enough. It carried with me all through school – never being good enough. Then as I married, I was excited to marry into a large Christian family – only to find out that they didn’t accept me either. I thought it really MUST be ME – but God is faithful and loving. He brought us to a community where I have been able to be myself AND be ACCEPTED for who I am. This enables me to do His work and to feel good about myself. That chatter creeps back in often – but I can push that aside because He is helping me to understand that their non-acceptance is THEIR problem, not mine. As long as I am living for Him, I am on the right track. And I know that even though I am not perfect, I am ALWAYS accepted by God the Father – who lovingly created me just as I am!!
My inside chatter…my inside chatter is limiting. It’s self defeating and keeps me from being exactly who God wants me to be…it has the ability to make me feel like I’m not beautiful, but God! Thank God for His Word which provides us with everything we need to defeat the enemy! Without it I would never recover from all the negative self chatter. God’s word provides me with positive self chatter which makes the devil flee!!!
There was a time when I heard nothing but the negative chatter. I did a lot of work with the help of professionals, and I overcame that. However, I feel myself sliding back. At 34 years old, unmarried, no children, health problems that make me unable to drive, I spend much of my time alone. It’s hard.
What a perfect read this Monday morning! How often we forget that “idle chatter” can lead to the destruction of friendships and self-esteem. Thank you for allowing me this little reality check.
Probably the worse part of growing up when you are a girl is inside chatter. I so very clearly remember the days of crying because I wasn’t included in a certain group of girls or wasn’t invited to a party everyone else seemed to be. I remember thinking in high school that as I grew up it has to stop, I mean it can’t be like this forever right? WRONG! Inside chatter never stops, it’s constantly there. I still have good friends of mine who will ask if I’m upset with them and I am totally not and have no clue why they would thing that. Turns out they took something I did the wrong way and started picking it apart. I still struggle with it sometimes but Jesus has been working hard in that area of my life. Constantly whispering to me that His opinion of me is the only one that matters, that my sweet friend didn’t mean it that way, that all will be ok and I just need to lean on Him. Praise God for such a loving Savior!
I’ve learned inside chatter comes from not taking my thoughts captive, thinking on the wrong things, and filling up on the noise of this world.
How do we turn off this inside chatter? I guess the best way is to dive into the Bible, right? Thank you for a great message!
It’s hard not to listen to my inner chatter. I just remind myself that it isn’t truth. The truth about me is in Him.
Recently I have been going through a very difficult situation with my brother and his fiance. This problem has impacted my entire family and is very ugly. People are constantly trying to bring us down. When other’s use our vulnerabilities against us, it attaches to our own insecurity and festers. It feels like I question everything and what everyone must think about me, if this one or two people say it everyone must feel it. It has been immeasurably helpful to remain strong in Christ and know that my identity is not from others. My identity is in Christ alone, and I am a treasure. Spending a few quiet minutes alone meditating on the Creator who loves me and designed me to be a princess. That pretty much quiets the inside chatter.
Although the enemy is driven to whisper the lies that would stifle me, it is the Spirit who lives in me and who I need to listen to. Truth and light will dispell the lies. This does not mean that the lies wont keep coming and sometimes I’ll baste in them. But He is faithful to meet us if we seek Him. He is faithful to remind me who I am but more beautiful, He reminds me of who He is—-and I am His daughter.
I have been a victim of the inside chatter too many times to say. I wish I could say it stopped when I graduated high school and entered college, but truth be told.. I don’t think it will ever end. Sometimes I get so wrapped up into little details of conversations with others that I truely miss the point of the conversation (Did she just in a round about way call me fat!?) No matter what the chatter says, I am a daughter of our Risen Savior, Jesus Christ. It is in Him that I find my peace, comfort, and assuarance. Thank you Jesus!
Inside chatter. I can say that i have dealt with this inside chatter all my life. I have been divorced because of multiple affairs that my ex husband had. One day I decided that i wouldn’t put up with his vicious and destructive cycle of affairs and disrespect of our marriage. Years later i remarried being that i was only 23 and lived a wonderful firdt year of marriage. We have a wonderful son and he is my everything. A year and a half in our marriage and after a nasty routine of arguments and fights, my now husband cheats on me repeatedly for almost a year… All lf this tragic happenings in my life have left me with inside chatters that speak negative things about me, that i am not worth being happy, im not worth being respected and valued and that im not worth being happy. This very moment my husband and i are working on repairing our relationship with God and finding the tools to restore our marriage. Because i believe that God has called us onto better greater things. And day by day i asl God to restore my heart, my husband’s heart and our marriage.
Learning to ignore the inside chatter is so difficult. Coming to realize what is does not mean is the key. I cannot live my life worrying some much about why someone did not pick me, etc.
Wow! Amazing you blogged about this very topic! Negative thoughts are so destructive, especially with our teens. We need to remind them they are all children of God and one negative situation/word spoken to them does not define them for life! I just spent all weekend with a group of teens from our church at Resurrection 2013. This very topic came up many times for discussion. God Bless You for your blog!
One important thing I’ve learned about ‘inside chatter’ is that satan is RELENTLESS!! He will not give up trying to detour, deceive and destroy us and our witness. And how important it is to stay plugged-in/abiding in Gods word and His truths of who we are, and that friends, family and spouses are NOT our enemy!
I have dealt with the negative “inside chatter” most of my life. Once I started spending more time with God and reading His word I was able to fight back the negatives with who God says I am. It helps to know that others go through the same thing.
Inside chatter use to rule my life. I always heard, “You can’t do it!” I lived in fear for the first 32 years of my life. I ate my way through all my emotions.
I was fed up, and in August of 2011, I began to pray and ask God to help me find my want to. My want to to live life again. My want to be healthy. In October of 2011, I woke up wanting to be healthy and to live again. Through prayer, my friends and I discovered your book, “Made To Crave.” We began a book study group that meets every Monday night that has never ended. We read that book twice followed by, “Made To Crave Action Plan.” Next week we begin, “Unglued.” 🙂
Through reading your books and God’s Word I learned to go to God, not food. I leaned how to live again! I learned how to be at peace and I leaned that I can do it…with God! 🙂 I lost 117 lbs and I’m still going strong! I began reading from the beginning of Genesis and now I’m in 2 Corinthians! I feel at peace and I’m thankful for all I was taught by you, God, and the support around me!
Praise the Lord! 🙂
Oh, inside chatter…how I know it all to well. I have spent most of my life dealing with that negative inside voice telling me that I’m never enough. In areas of weight, appearance, motherhood, being a wife, and being a pastor’s wife I have fought those negative voices and I wish I could say that I am great at overcoming them. I try to stay in the word and say scripture aloud when I feel the chatter begin. I speak Truth from God’s Word and that helps me. Nobody’s perfect and God does not expect me to be; if I was perfect I would not need Him.
I want to be an example of a strong, woman of faith for my 11 (almost 12) year old daughter. I get so caught up in what the world thinks of me, that I don’t stop to consider what my Father thinks of me or what my actions are saying to my very impressionable daughter. I want her to grow up to live by her faith, knowing that no matter what the world does or says, she has been chosen by the only ONE that matters! Lord, help me to be an example…
Wow! I have waaaay to much ‘Inside Chatter’ going on! What’s sad is that my ‘IC’ is coming out of my daughters mouth! WHAT? They have picked up my negativeness and even tho I ‘tell’ them who thy are in Christ, they ‘see’ who I ‘believe’ I am in Christ and I then see that I am lacking God’s ‘IC’. Ugh! I am wanted by God…not needed…WANTED!! That needs to me my ‘IC’. Thanks for the encouragement.
Not only in women…this inside chatter is so destructive to ALL of our children as well. My 12-year-old son struggles with this, and it’s given me the awesome opportunity to “speak truth” into his life (and into my own too!). We struggle with the tendency to apply a global statement like, “No one likes me” or “I don’t have ANY friends.” When we step back and really examine the situation we can see that is a lie from Satan himself. It also gives us the opportunity to examine our own actions to make sure we’re not exhibiting behaviors that are causing a stumbling block for others. We need to look in the mirror and clearly see truth vs. lies, and then act on that truth. (James 1:22-25)
Wow! Amazing you blogged about this very topic! Negative thoughts are so destructive, especially with our teens. We need to remind them they are all children of God and one negative situation/word spoken to them does not define them for life!
My inside chatter has been a reflection of my negative self image for many years, I always felt I was not good enough, pretty enough. I felt no one could love me as my own father had walked out on my mom and I. After suffering those negative thoughts for all those years and holding my self back from ever getting close to anyone, I finally found God and his never ending love and as I learned of his love and to love my self my inner chatter became a voice of motivation, gratitude and happiness.
My inside chatter came from growing up with an abusive father who constantly reminded me that I was nothing, would never amount to anything, and was a stupid idiot. Fast-forward 35 years later and I am completely amazed how God has “almost” totally wiped out that negative chatter and has shown me things that just simply blow me away! I struggle with the chatter still, depending on the situation I am facing. I still lack in self confidence and tend to be shy. But I know that with Christ I can do anything!
I have battled with “inside chatter” for most of my life, and it’s usually not positive things I say about myself. I compare myself to other women or moms who seem to do more, be more, have more etc. and I tear myself down. I daily have to say no to those negative words and open my bible to clear my mind. Focusing on Christ is the ONLY way to stop focusing on yourself!
Inside chatter has been my constant companion for as long as I can remember always reminding me that I’m not good enough. Recently, through scripture the Lord has shown me that I’m right, I’m not enough. However, Christ is enough! Christ in me makes me enough! I now have a list of scripture including Colossians 2:9-10 that remind me I am enough through Christ, so when I’m bombarded with inside chatter I shut it down with scripture. Some days I’m more successful than others, but I refuse to give up. “Greater is He that is in me, than he that is in the world!”
Inside chatter. Thank the Almighty God for providing choice. We can choose which chatter to pay attention to. When the chatter is negative, we can choose to seek God’s wisdom. We can choose to create positive chatter….notice the word create. Sometimes circumstances seem so overwhelming that anything positive seems utterly impossible. This is when we must create positive chatter, and through the power of the Holy Spirit we can create this positive chatter and release the negative chatter.
I was always the smallest in my class, so I was always left out. I didn’t have any close friends till High School. Even now the chatter is there telling me that I am not the best friend and wife and mother that I could be.
Inside chatter – often negative – is right where Satan wants us. He helps perpetuate that inside chatter so we feel inferior and inadequate so we struggle to come to God for strength. If he can keep us in that vicious circle of negativity, he’s won – on two fronts. For us, so we won’t seek out God because we don’t feel worthy enough, but also this inside chatter often involves others. If we perpetuate on the chatter that involves others, we speculate how they feel about us and it can destroy friendships that would otherwise be healthy Christian ones. Recognize inside chatter for what it is: chatter. Know where it comes from. Don’t let it define you or your relationship in Christ. Swat it away like the pesky fly it is. Yes, this is hard to do, and it can only be accomplished through fervent prayer and strength from God.
I battle the inside chatter daily, and when I catch myself thinking negatively, I tell the devil to go away, and I ask that God guide me back to the path He has planned for me. I have to remind myself to think and act daily with faith, hope and love when the negative chatter starts to make me question my worth, makes me feel hopeless, and makes me think and act out in negative ways (in anger, frustration, etc.). I read a quote the other day that said “Make up your mind that you’re not going to quit until you see the fruit of what God has placed within you” — that’s exactly what I need every day, to press into God and keep moving forward!
Oh, how I needed this little blog post on “inside chatter”
Inside Chatter has been a part of my life for, well at least 40 years.
It’s funny but I never really looked at it like I did today. So thank you for bringing it to my attention!!! Now, to have a little “outside chatter” with my “inside chatter”!!
Teresa
I am there right now struggling! Satan has really been at me! Wow! I’ve been struggling all morning…. fighting not to “give up”! I am strong but frustrated!
I always seem to have a hard time with “inside chatter”. I tend to worry a lot about what others think of me or if I’m liked but it is in those moments when The Lord reminds me…I am His child and he loves me no matter what! I can take comfort in knowing that as long as I am a child of the King, I will always be loved!
So much inside chatter I feel like it can be a daily battle to push it aside. Thank you for talking about this frustrating issue.
I find that my inside chatter intensifies when I am home during the day by myself . . .it is quiet (with everyone gone at school and work) and should be peaceful, but that is when Satan knows I am at my weakest and the inside chatter starts!! So I turn on my praise and worship music and starting focusing on all of the good that God has blessed my life with!! I have always thought negatively about myself, but if I remember all of His promises of being His child – it helps quiet the inside chatter!
Thank you for this post! I need to remind my self daily that I belong to Him, created in His image and that He CHOSE me to be His child. And that’s all that matters in the end.
Wow. I’m so looking forward to the webcast tomorrow night. “Inside chatter” can make us crazy. Our minds are so powerful and we can begin to believe our thoughts. Daily I remind myself of my identity in Christ. I can allow my world around me to change that. Psalm 73:24 (NLT) says, “You guide me with your counsel, leading me to a glorious destiny.” I have to seek God’s counsel daily to combat the battle raging inside my head!
I’ve been going through a career transition and there are days that the negative chatter is worse than others. I have to remind myself when I do not get a job that it is because it is not what the Lord has planned instead of focusing on “what is wrong with me” that they don’t want to hire me. If I feed the negative, it spreads. Got to be more positive and trust the Lord and his plans!
Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer. -Psalms 19:14
I’m in my 60s and am still learning not to listen to that chatter. I try to remind myself to look up and focus on how good God has been to me.
Oh I know about inner chatter!!! But my God is so big, so strong and so mighty!!
It’s definitely something I struggle with daily, sometimes more than others… I try to pray or distract myself with other things like listening to worship music or reading something that is positive. I’ve taken to saving scripture verses on my laptop as backgrounds so that’s always something I’m looking at. When I bake/cook (something I truely enjoy and love doing) I will purposely put worship music on so that I am dwelling in a place with God, otherwise I am giving satan an opportunity to hit me hard where it really bothers me. I can’t tell you how many times things that I’ve made a million times or are pretty easy for me get fouled up and then I’m sitting there questioning the very core of myself because I couldn’t accomplish a simple task. When truely it’s satan toying with me in a place I hold very dear. Anywho, that’s how I combat stinkin thinkin. lol Blessings!
As women chatter is what we know. THats how we thrive so it makes sense that thats how we also “war” with our minds. We have to be on guard – in the shower, driving in the car, laying in bed each night – we are loved – we are worthy – HE makes us WHOLE! Vain imaginations and false thinking has no place in our minds or hearts! We are loved ;0)
Thank the Almighty God for choice. When inside chatter is negative, we can choose to seek God’s wisdom. We can choose to create positive chatter….notice the word create. Sometimes circumstances are so overwhelming that anything positive seems utterly impossible. This is when we must create positive chatter, and through the power of the Holy Spirit we can create this positive chatter and release the negative chatter.
My inside chatter can be pretty loud sometimes! I have been working on replacing my unhealthy thoughts with God-thoughts from Scripture. For instance, if I’m thinking that I am failing as a mother (it’s ALWAYS dramatic!), I turn to God’s Word. The Lord speaks to me with His gentle assurance, reminding me that I have a new day to look forward to: “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness!” ~ Lamentations 3:22-23
I have battled inside chatter for many years as well as the self-loathing and depression that it brings with it. It is a tool that Satan found very effective on me until I realized how important I am as a child of God. God found me worthy enough to allow Jesus to suffer and die for me and to make me His child. How could I be more important than that??? I still battle inside chatter, but now I am winning that battle by giving myself contact reminders that I am worth so much to the One who matters most. I have little sayings taped to my bathroom mirror and posted around my desk at work. I repeat the positive statements in my head and eventually, you begin to believe what you hear…the positive instead of the negative inside chatter.
I’ve learned “inside chatter” can be very discouraging. It can also put you in a place that can make you a victim to Satan’s lies. It’s always good to return to the God’s word, Psalm 139.
Ugh. I have so much inner chatter — and it’s so hard to ignore it sometimes. I am really working hard to listen to God’s Word and memorize it, so that I have it in my head to combat all the inner chatter….
I find the more I know who God is, the more I know who I am. I can tell when I’m not actively seeking Him because the voices grow louder and frequent. But I am reminded of 2 Corinthians 10:5 and know that every thought can be taken captive and made obedient to Christ.
Even though the rejections of life can be very painful, we will never be rejected by our savior if we only Trust in Him and His fullness. He will never ever leave us. Heb.13:5 Thankful everyday!
I have recently decided to change careers and go into counseling. I was so confident that this is the right path, God is behind me all the way. I also teach a youth group of girls on Sundays. Lately I have been teaching them about Purity, something close to my heart and past experiences. I have been feeling lost with it lately, all of it. I think you may have been healed of things in your past but you don’t know how to help someone else, you don’t know how to teach this stuff. I noticed I am trying to control and teach from my own experience and it is hard to release control and just let the Spirit lead. I told myself today, I am not going with my feelings or thoughts, I am going with what I know. I know I desire to help others who have been abused and made bad decisions, I can help others heal with God’s help. I will learn to release control and let God be God through me. I will follow this new path no matter how hard it is and no matter what I think along the way.
As a survivor of child abuse from my own mother, I continually struggle with this inner turmoil. I have read books and devotionals, seen counselors and therapists, and still have a hard time controlling it. I remember all I’ve learned in my head-it’s hard to push it all down into my heart. I still have major negative self talk, compare myself to others, set over-reaching goals, and be hard on myself. But slowly, each day with grace, I’m learning that I am only human and I am not supposed to bare these mental burdens. So I’m working hard to erase the old mental tapes and record new ones. I am trying to stop myself and give the bad thoughts to God and remind myself who I am in Him. Thank you for all you do to inspire women.
I “remember” not getting the pink shirt. Even as a mother 8 still often find myself worrying about why I did ‘t ” get a shirt”. Thank you for your words
The chatter seems louder these days and although I have been reminded over and over of who I am in Christ, the chatter seems to drown out the truth. Today is a new day, your post has enlighted me, I am chosen, I am invited and I am not only liked, I am loved by the most high God. Time to let go of me and grab hold of HIM!! Thank you!
If I don’t constantly remind myself who I am in Christ, the inside chatter can become overwhelming. Spending some time daily in His Word keeps the inside chatter in perspective. 🙂
Inside chatter has been a huge issue in my life. I never feel like I am as good as other people and that if other people really knew me, they wouldn’t like me. I also worry way too much about what other people think This was a great post to read this morning. A nice way to start the week.
This is a HUGE struggle for me–overcoming the negative ‘inside chatter’ is a weekly, daily, hourly prayer! This affects SO many areas of my life! I know that God makes no mistakes, and designed me just as He intended, now I must ward off those negative thoughts and BELIEVE in the goodness I possess!
Inside negative chatter, can be about lots of different topics, work, family, home, church, etc…..still working on it and lots of prayer…..
Some days I am able to combat the inside chatter by telling myself that I KNOW that’s not coming from God and therefore, NOT allowed in my mind or my heart. Other days when I am feeling overwhelmed by my illness and limitations, I feel so helpless as though wave after wave keeps knocking me down and I am not strong enough to fight the lies in the chatter. I know God has a plan for me and it WILL further His kingdom in spite of my challenges. I’ve felt like I’ve been on the precipice for years now. The biggest lie the chatter keeps throwing at me is fear and just when I feel I am strong enough to fight it and punch it in its stupid lying face, the enemy whispers in my ear and all that I’ve fought for, seems to disappear as though it were just a mirage. There are days I believe the chatter and that I am a failure in many capacities and other days, I can tell it to go away and I am a child of God and NOTHING will stop me. It just seems like lately there are more days of believing the chatter than telling it to go take a hike. I would cherish more days of shushing the derogatory chatter and help others learn to discern and shush their inner derogatory chatter as well.
I am glad I am not alone in hearing the inside chatter lol! I am working on positive chatter instead of the negative.
Finally, at 50, I am learning to quiet some of that Inside Chatter. I am not always successful, but,,,,I am learning…..
That inside chatter, the self doubt, all of that isn’t what defines me. It’s who I am in Christ that defines me. I am a daughter of the King of Kings!! It’s in Christ that I find truth. It surely is easy as a mom to look around at other moms who are “doing it better” and get dragged into that “chatter” or to be left out of a play date (not on purpose, but like you said, just weren’t thought of) and that chatter comes back again – “Do they not like me? Do they think my kids are trouble makers?” But look to Christ to find your true worth!
Thank the Almighty God for choice. When inside chatter is negative, we can choose to seek God’s wisdom. We can choose to create positive chatter….notice the word create. When circumstances are so overwhelming that anything positive seems utterly impossible, we must create positive chatter through the power of the Holy Spirit.
I find myself going out of my way to help others never feel like the outsider and the “I don’t fit in” panic. By focusing on others, I don’t experience that chatter and feelings like I did when I was younger.
I learned not too long ago to stop that “inside chatter” by looking at my own life, rather than what others DON’T do that sometimes leaves me feeling left out or alone. Maybe they didn’t think I’d be available…do I frequently talk about how busy I am & act like I don’t have time? Maybe I complain about being broke and they thought I couldn’t afford that outing. Have I taken the first step and invited others to do something, or am I just sitting there waiting for them & having myself a pity party when they don’t think of me? This is something I dealt with some in the past year & it’s been on my mind recently when someone else was feeling left out. Thanks for this topic today. <3
What I have learned from my inside chatter, is when it starts…identify where is it coming from- God? the enemy? myself? I *try* not to dwell on the chatter, or it becomes “Chatty Cathy” and never stops!! Remind myself who I am, WHOSE I am & move FORWARD!! So looking forward to tomorrow’s webcast, 2 of my favorites- together! Yay! 🙂 {The t-shirt would be perfect to wear to this year’s Women of Faith!!!!}
I am learning slowly to obey the Word and take each thought captive to Christ, before I spiral the situation out of control and create scenarios that aren’t real or blow the smallest things out of proportion. It isn’t easy but it is worth it!!
I know in my life “inside chatter” has always been something that has been a terrible issue for me. All my life I’ve “never been good enough”. I’ve either been told that by my father or felt that by my peers. I either wasn’t in the “in” crowd at school, wasn’t a sports/cheerleader type, didn’t make honor society like the rest of my friends. I just tended to float around somewhere in the middle. As an adult, I started to flourish after I had my kids, until I got my step kids after their mother died (I’m a mother of 5 kids now). Then, I was told I wasn’t doing a good enough job (or I felt like I wasn’t) by others in their mom’s side of the family. I didn’t live up to their expectations. Then of course as a wife as I’ve grown older I’ve changed health wise with illness (and i’m only 34) and don’t feel like I’m good enough because I’m not the wife I used to be and can’t be. So I understand how hard it is to listen and not to listen to those inner voices in your head. Its very hard to focus on the realization that you are good enough and that is just Satan trying to get at you and trying to make you doubt yourself. I’ve learned many things lately and one is Perseverance http://instagram.com/p/VBzlSgoaN7/ Here is my reminder .. I call him Percy 🙂
Negative chatter has been with me all of my life. It’s caused depression and anger. I’m sure it has ruined many a relationship because I completely believed it all. As a new Christian(accepted Jesus in July 2012 and baptized December 2012) I thought all of that would subside, and it did for awhile. What I realized was that I was becoming lazy in my faith, not spending time in his Word. By doing that the enemy could get in and start making me feel I couldn’t even be a “good Christian”. So as I turn back to God and read the truth in His word, that inside chatter is not so strong. Sometimes it’s even funny. It can be a daily challenge. I feel I’m becoming stronger to deal with it every day.
I have found power in the prayer “Lord, do not let me believe the lies of the enemy.”
I have been trying to recognize negative chatter and as soon as I recognize it I try to reverse it. I will admit that negative chatter easily creeps in from time to time.
Haven’t been able to do the study, but would LOVE to!
Thank the Almighty God for choice. When inside chatter is negative, we can choose to create positive chatter….notice the word create. When circumstances are so overwhelming that anything positive seems utterly impossible, we must create positive chatter through the power of the Holy Spirit.
I often hear the inner chatter telling me to “keep up with the Jones’, or else”. It takes me a minute to remember to listen to God telling me that I need to keep up with his plan for me!
This is definitely the hardest thing for me and where the devil comes at me the hardest!!! I am trying to memorize scriptures that will help with this — Phillipians 4:8 is my stand by — heard a wonderful lesson at RU, several months ago on taking every thought captive — from II Corinthians 2:5. Currently leading an Unglued Bible Study at my church — we just started last week!!! So excited to see how God is going to use this study!!!!!
Hi,
My name is Mary, I’m 25 and I have three kids…a 3 year old girl, 1 year old boy, and a 5 month old girl. In short, I pretty much feel like an incapable failure in every aspect of “me.” I’ve been married for almost 6 years and we had the kids so close to each other, especially the last two were less than a year apart…so it’s been alot of stress with the little ones. And hard being pregnant for two years in a row practically. I’m a ballet dancer as well, so my self esteem has taken a hit with all the body changes as well. Anyway, I just feel totally buried in everything…I’m a stay at home Kim during the day while my husband works, and I’m thankful that I can do that. But I find myself just exploding all the time! I have a history of depression and experience alot of anxiety day in and day out. I downloaded your book Unglued two nights ago on my Nook after a particularly disheartening night, and it’s a great book. I was just hoping for some advice. I’d love to see a therapist, but I know we can’t afford it….what are your thoughts on meds? Not to manage depression, cuz I for wanna be a zombie, but I tend to be such an anxious mess alot of the time. I’ve had a couple of straight up anxiety attacks, not being able to breath, ect..and wonder if I need to take something. But then I just think I should be able to just read my bible more, and I’m just not spiritual enough, if I was, I could overcome these problems. Ugh. Help! I lash out constantly…I feel so ashamed…I love my family so much, and God has always been faithful to us. But inside my own head…I’m just a MESS. Any advice would be soooo welcome!
Thanks 🙂
Thankfully I have not personally been plagued with negative chatter from what others say or do. I have chatter…don’t get me wrong—I’m hard on myself. I have found that it is just always best to talk to my Heavenly Father when frustrated with myself or with what others are doing.
I loved this post because I immediately thought of my oldest daughter and her struggle with the negative chatter in her head. I think she will relate to your post and it says things that I have been trying to convey to her, yet I’m not always best with words.
This journey that I’m going through has taught me that often times, my negative inside chatter is the enemy trying to derail my progress. I’m slowly learning to pray this out of my head and focus on how far I’ve come. I’ve had negative inside chatter for most of my life, so this is no easy task!!!
I have learned that ‘inside chatter’ is a reflection of the condition of my heart. Ouch. Sometimes it is easier for me to blame the inside chatter on the situation I am in, the people around me, my past etc. However, when I take a closer listen to the inside chatter, it is a direct hit below the belt in areas only I can give it permission to hit. When I fail to forgive myself for something I have done, the chatter starts to remind me of all my failures and shortcomings as a mother, wife, daughter, or worse Christian. Then magically, I am transfixed on the failure instead of the forgiveness, the monotony instead of the Mercy and the garbage instead of the Grace. I am renting the devil space in my mind, but If I’m not careful he could live rent free in my heart too. I have to carefully pick apart each voice in my head and determine… “Says who?” “You are a horrible mother!” … “Says Who?” That is not what God says about me, His child that he gifted another human to my care. Scripturally I can dismantle every word. So for me, it is simple, either I completely belive God and everything He has to say, or I believe the chatter. I think I’ll go with God on this one.
I constantly battle with inside chatter which then turns to anxiety. Leaning on God for this struggle and remembering that I AM FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made!!
How much further in life might I be if I didn’t battle “inside chatter”! As I grow in Christ and learn to take every thought captive things get easier, it is a constant effort and I am so thankful for recourses that assist in that effort!
Inside Chatter – Sometimes my days are ruled by inside chatter, I have to make a conscious efforts to block out the Negative noise!
These negative “tapes” as I call them play inside our heads daily! It is a choice each day to stop them! Mine range from “I’m not good enough” to “I don’t deserve good things”, and so on… As a child of Christ, though, how great it is to remind myself daily that I AM enough, that I am fearfully and wonderfully made”! 🙂
As a new graduate from veterinary school, you look so young was negative. It made me feel inadequate and incapable. It came across as are you sure you know what you are doing? Can I trust you with my pet? I had to learn how to handle this and become stronger. It probably would have been easier if I knows Christ then. But 20 some odd years later, I thank the people who tell me I look young. I trust that God will give us the clients we need and I know not everyone will like me. I strive to treat everyone with love and grace, but some days are better than others.
My inside chatter almost always says “You shouldn’t have said that”!! That starts about 5 seconds after something comes out that….should have stayed in!
I have learned that I let inside chatter control every aspect of my emotions. Until I read Unglued. Your book pointed me to scriptures that have greatly impacted my reactions. At the time I was facing serious family issues. Had I not been directed toward God and away from the chatter, I probably would have written a few people out of my life rather than improve the relationship.
As insiginficant as it might seem, I hear the inside chatter everytime a facebook friend unfriends me for no reason known to me.. it is a form of rejection for me..
Hi,
My name is Mary, I’m 25 and I have three kids…a 3 year old girl, 1 year old boy, and a 5 month old girl. In short, I pretty much feel like an incapable failure in every aspect of “me.” I’ve been married for almost 6 years and we had the kids so close to each other, especially the last two were less than a year apart…so it’s been alot of stress with the little ones. And hard being pregnant for two years in a row practically. I’m a ballet dancer as well, so my self esteem has taken a hit with all the body changes as well. Anyway, I just feel totally buried in everything…I’m a stay at home mom during the day while my husband works, and I’m thankful that I can do that. But I find myself just exploding all the time! I have a history of depression and experience alot of anxiety day in and day out. I downloaded your book Unglued two nights ago on my Nook after a particularly disheartening night, and it’s a great book. I was just hoping for some advice. I’d love to see a therapist, but I know we can’t afford it….what are your thoughts on meds? Not to manage depression, cuz I for wanna be a zombie, but I tend to be such an anxious mess alot of the time. I’ve had a couple of straight up anxiety attacks, not being able to breath, ect..and wonder if I need to take something. But then I just think I should be able to just read my bible more, and I’m just not spiritual enough, if I was, I could overcome these problems. Ugh. Help! I lash out constantly…I feel so ashamed…I love my family so much, and God has always been faithful to us. But inside my own head…I’m just a MESS. Any advice would be soooo welcome!
Thanks 🙂
I really struggle with the “inside chatter” sometimes. And it doesn’t seem to take much to set it off some days….but a very wise woman told me once that Satan operates in darkness which is where that “inside chatter” takes place. Once we take those thoughts captive and expose them to the light by speaking them out loud, Jesus can show us how and whose we truly are and negate every single one of those awful things going through our heads. Some days are better than others and I know this is an area I need to work more on. I’ve wasted a lot of time dwelling inside my own head miserable when all I needed to do was go sit at the feet of Jesus and let Him remind me of His truths.
I think as ‘girls’ we all struggle with this. I know I did as a child, I think however the thing that has helped me the most is having daughters of my own and sharing with them just how special they are. How others peoples opinions and actions do not define who they are. AND for them to remember to always treat others with kindness. Just last week my 2nd grader confronted a friend who was saying mean things about another friend and now they are all friends. One of my prouder mommy moments for sure!
Inside chatter can make a difference between a negative attitude and a positive attitude. Between finishing a workout strong, and barely getting through. Between an enevitable disagreement between my husband and I, and understanding of where the other person is coming from. Between having the strength and perspective to enjoy my family, and expecting something to go wrong/someone to annoy me/etc when we visit them.
In other words, for me, it can make a world of difference in me having a good day or a bad day. It’s such a battle, and I often don’t know how to fight it appropriately, or soon enough.
I struggle with this over and over again. Constant battle with my heart and mind of whether I’m good enough or worthy enough. I try to tell myself I don’t care and it doesn’t matter, yet I repeatedly find myself in tears….because it does…at least to me.
I struggle so deeply with accepting God’s love. Thought he hated me….so had for me to grasp my identity in him. I can’t seem to get out of performance mode. My whole life has been built around performing in order to be loved so how can God be any different? I’m definitely looking forward to hearing tomorrow’s webcast. I so desperately need it.
My inside chatter can really get me down somedays but I am continually learning that what I think inside isn’t what God thinks. His grace is enough and he knows the real me!!
Lisa, this isn’t the first time your words have encouraged me to not listen to that negative “inside chatter”, but to embrace His overwhelming love for me instead. Thank you! 🙂
I have just spent the past 8 years in a custody battle for 2 of my sons. We have had shared parenting all of these years while my ex wanted full to keep them from me forever. I constantly hear his negative words echoing in my head and spent most of the past 8 years in fear of others believing the same. This past year and a half I finally gave it to God who reminded me that He knew the truth and would love me no matter what others said about me. I was a good enough mother. If God didn’t think I had it in me to raise these boys successfully, He would never have blessed me with them in the first place. I gained full custody on Friday. The hurtful chatter is still going on around me but God loves me and has placed me in a church filled with people who help remind me that God has my back.
Thank you for sharing this story and for the webcast – can’t wait to listen! I have struggled with inside chatter all my life and still do, the “you are never gonna be good enough”, the “you’re not worth it”, etc. I struggled with them during my childhood, always feeling that I could never measure up to what my mother expected. Now as an adult, with my own childen, I struggle with the “I’m not a good enough mother” and with my husband, “I’m not a good enough wife”, “he doesn’t really want me”. Marital problems don’t help with this. All I can do is turn to God and fight these thoughts with the truth that He created ME absolutely the way He wanted me to be and He loves ME and I meant so much to Him that He sent His Son to suffer through a horrible death, in order that I may be reconciled to Him with my sins forgiven. But for me, it sometimes seems like a daily struggle. As for the story you shared, my daughter (who is the sweetest girl with the biggest heart) has been through the same exact thing, for the second time now. How hard it is to see our children hurting. Thank you for sharing how I can help her also to combat these messages from the enemy and focus on all that matters, which is how much the Lord loves us and how we can love each other. And the rest is just piddly stuff.
Inside chatter… sometimes I just wish I didn’t talk to myself in my head. I am leading a Bible Study on Unglued at our church and tonight is Week 6.. so sad to see it end. I recently wrote a blog about it because I don’t even think I realized the daily messages I fed myself. Thank you for awakening me to my inside chatter because only when you acknowledge can you change… Daily I work on replacing the words…
I experienced the chatter just this morning! I am thankful for God’s Word, and when I hide it in my heart-when I choose to acknowledge it, it quickly outweighs the chatter and reminds me who I am in Him.
Thanks for the reminder. Your post always speak to me right where I am. Even if there is negativity around, God is always on your side no matter what. I need to remember this because there’s a lot negative people at work. My life saying is “live today as if it’s your last.”
I went on a mission trip to London during the Olympics. I was completely blessed by the entire experience. As soon as I came back, Satan started attacking me through my weakest points, which mostly turned to negative chatter in my head. I am not good enough to do Women’s Ministry (I am the leader at my church. I am not a good enough stay at home mother. I made the wrong choice to quit my job and stay home with my kids. I am not a good wife. The list goes on. I have really been trying to quiet Satan and the negative chatter. Some days are good, even great. Other days I fail to claim God’s promises in my life and the negative chatter begins all over again. It is a struggle, but turning my thoughts over to Christ can help me battle it.
Inside chatter… sometimes I just wish I didn’t talk to myself in my head. I am leading a Bible Study on Unglued at our church and tonight is Week 6.. so sad to see it end. I recently wrote a blog about it because I don’t even think I realized the daily messages I fed myself. Thank you for awakening me to my inside chatter because only when you acknowledge can you change… Daily I work on replacing the words…
Sheri
At the church girl’s club for which I serve as a counselor, we’re spending the entire year on the subject of right thinking based on the truth found in Philippians 4:8. Our theme has been to “Think Right! Win the Fight!” and it certainly has been a fight…for each of us, counselors and girls alike. Even in the midst of the fight, God has given each of us the power to think on the things which please Him.
I love how God continues to direct my attention to the importance of the battle of the mind, by providing yet another resource through tomorrow night’s webcast. I look forward to listening in on the conversation. 🙂
I have learned that my inside chatter can be something that I heard a long time ago that suddenly reappears at the WORST TIMES in my life.
Thanks for this post. It’s very relevant to me. I can’t wait to hear you guys tomorrow!
Ok, I am NOT THAT Bethany! And for me it was Pink High Top Converse! But, oh how I can relate! Lysa, Thank you for your inspiration and words of wisdom. I am plotting and planning a gathering at church tomorrow night to view your webcast in community with a bunch of awesome ladies who you have helped encourage me to seek out and share the Word with. Pray that technology conforms to my wishes!!!! Inside chatter nearly stopped me from voicing my want to do this, meeting conflict, recent illness, BLAH BLAH BLAH. But I gathered the courage from all your encouragement and that of my sisters in Christ and spoke the words, got the go ahead, and now just trying to quiet the “inside chatter” that still struggles to sabotage my efforts. One day at a time, One prayer at at a time… oh and maybe a cable and router or two? If it be HIS will, we will see you Tomorrow!
I hear negative chatter all the time, it sneaks in when I’m tired, discouraged, etc. I’ve learned not to argue with it, I say “Jesus” out loud and it goes away!
I am making “imperfect progress” in regards to “Inside chatter.” I find that having Scriptures at the ready is the best way in dealing with the chatter. That doesn’t mean that I always can ignore the chatter, but I try.
Inside chatter has been a negative voice in most of my life. After attending She speaks in July 2012, and reading Unglued in it’s entirety on the flight back to Oregon! …. I ‘heard’ the Lord clearly for the first time. What a destructive, somewhat voluntary tool we allow ourselves to engage in! After hearing you in person, reading the book, I have more awareness than ever of how to avoid that negative chatter that I gave into for so long. Thinking on my own childhood story, which is too long to comment here, I came home and dug deep. With the ‘message’ of Unglued for me, I then took it to the women, for them. Now, inside chatter has less and less of a voice and we are about to go our second round of group study. Thank you, Lysa. For being spirit led and not always the lead…. Embracing, the Encouragement of Empowerment each day.
Inside chatter is such a good description of the activity in my head on a regular basis. I have anxiety disorder and so it’s easy for me to get caught up in doubt, planning, second guessing every action, conversation, and relationship I may have during a day. I often fight it or get caught in it at night when I try to go to sleep. I have found God has to calm it cuz my tricks usually don’t work all the time. But I try to settle the chatter with verses and encouraging songs and prayer. The Holy Spirit has become more real to me than ever before as a result of the inside chatter. He has to do what I can’t. Let go, let God, and relax – Be Still and know I am God. Ps 40:10.
My Lord uses Meds to reduce some of the excess chatter but then He also leaves just enough for me to make a choice to let him handle all of it and the worries that the Inside chatter creates. As someone said earlier… Some days are easier and others are harder. But I’m thankful for the distance He’s brought me in a yr and a half of more learning to trust and rely on and in Him for the extra chatter quieting. Steady My Heart is a song that I find reminds me to let God hold my heart and thoughts when I can’t.
I have a version of your unglued book on my kindle and really enjoy it when I can stop to read it. I would love to have the whole series that’s in your giveaway here. I’m looking fwd to your broadcast today and I really appreciate your Fb posts. 🙂 thank you for embarking on the ministry God put in front of you and being real with what happens inside us. 🙂
As one of those who has dealt with rejection before (and healed now), I have to guard my thoughts to not take something that’s said (or the way someone looks at me) and twist it into something it’s not. My perception is not my reality. It’s a constant thing to take EVERY thought captive to Christ and stand on the truth of His Word. After words have been said to me and looks given, the Word and Truth of who I am is all that should remain. One of my favorite (and most needed) things to claim is that I have the mind of Christ!
That inside chatter can be so loud sometimes. But I’m learning to be more concerned about and focused on what HE thinks of me rather than what others may be thinking. HE says I am the apple of HIS eye (Psalm 17:8), HE says I am beautiful (Song of Solomon 4:7), HE says HE is wild for me (Psalm 45:11). I have to fill my mind with these truths to drown out all the negative inside chatter.
Inside chatter is always going to be there but the tone is a choice. Its like that saying, when you wake up in the morning you have a choice. You can have a good day or you can have a bad day. Just make a good choice. 🙂
I’m still learning. I have a 5yr old daughter with autism, and daily I hear that inner voice telling me that it is somehow my fault that she has this. She is prone to explosive outbursts, and daily I lose my temper with her and then I hear that voice telling me what a bad mom I am, and that she deserves better. And that her outbursts are a learned behavior that is all my fault. And that my husband deserves a better wife and mother to his children. I am just struggling.
I have struggled with inside chatter for as long as I can remember. This year has been a very transformative year for me. After reading Unglued 2 times, and soon to be 3 because I am leading a small group on it, and doing some other bible study work, I have finally learned how to quiet the inside chatter. My value does not come from people, things, or what I do. It comes from my creator. In His eyes I am a masterpiece. When I start hearing that negative chatter, I ask God His perspective through prayer or His Word. I no longer let this world define me. It is a fallen world but my home is not here. I belong to and with my Father.
The inside chatter in one thing that I have to fight with the power of God’s word and his promises to not forsake me. I am a elementary teacher who has chosen to stay at home with my three kids the past ten years and I am now re-entering the teaching world. So much has changed and I can find myself comparing my abilities to those around me and doubting that I am capable of leading a classroom of children again. It is in those times that I turn to a devotional or a song that reminds me that I am meant to touch many childrens lives with the love of God and the talent the HE has chosen to give me. No doubting!!!!!
I wonder sometimes why “inner chatter” seems to lean more to the negative side,than the positive. I think the enemy knows that as women, our minds are very susceptible and he loves to TRY to plant bad seeds. I started fighting back the inner chatter with my belt of Truth, my breastplate of righteousness, my shield of faith, my helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit. When Jesus was in the desert and the enemy tempted Him, his #1 defense was God’s truth through the Word. The only way we can be prepared to dismiss lies, is by refuting them with His truth!
Inside chatter is definitely something I’ve struggled with many times! Even though I have “grown up” I still have those moments when I let not being asked or invited get to me. On one hand I am confident in who I am and don’t “need” to be included in everything. On the other hand, who doesn’t want to be the center of everyone’s world?!
Looking forward to this and what a great gift!
This is just what I needed to hear today. I often let my mind go crazy and have to remind myself to stop it and trust God. Thanks for the great reminder today!
My family is being attacked hard right now and when you have so much on your mind it is very easy to get lost in all the chatter that goes on. I know the truth, I know what I should and need to do, but yet I tend to stay stuck in my thoughts of how it might all turn out (usually negative). The one thing I noticed this last week was that when I learned of a friend, who is also in a battle, and I called to encourage her. All of a sudden I was speaking all the words of wisdom that I knew and needed to be telling myself, were flowing out of my mouth. It encouraged me, brought me out of my funk. It reminded me that I was not alone in my struggles.We have a BIG God! He IS in control!
Oh the darned inside chatter…it’s a daily struggle. Some nights, it’s hard to fall asleep with all the “noise” in my head. Lies usually. Just this past weekend, I had these same feelings that you spoke of. Ny father (once again) told me on two different occasions how stupid what I had said was and it cut deep. I was brought back to that vulnerable little girl who was told many many times growing up how worthless I was. It’s hard not to stillImbelieve that. Thank you for this reminder, Lysa. I@
I have always said that I am my own worst enemy….my inside negative chatter has beaten me up since childhood. Am looking forward to learning how to combat that negativity…to learn to stifle that chatter.
Whew — inside chatter! I think, along with others comments, it’s easy to give positive and energizing thoughts to other but when it comes to our own, it’s a different story!! Always a struggle for me to discern between what my own personal thoughts are, Satan trying to direct my thoughts or my listening to what God is trying to tell me.
This was definitely something I needed to hear today. I must admitt that I have listened to inside chatter too often during my life, and it usually is not a positive chatter. Lately though, God has been making a point in letting me know that this chatter is not what he wants me to listen too. I need to listen to HIM. He tells me the TRUTH, which is all I need to know. I am so thankful for this. Now also, this is something I really want to teach my kids to help them for their life, to be able to live with God’s truth.
Blessings!!
Inside chatter is such a good description of the activity in my head on a regular basis. I have anxiety disorder and so it’s easy for me to get caught up in doubt, planning, second guessing every action, conversation, and relationship I may have during a day. I often fight it or get caught in it at night when I try to go to sleep. I have found God has to calm it cuz my tricks usually don’t work all the time. But I try to settle the chatter with verses and encouraging songs and prayer. The Holy Spirit has become more real to me than ever before as a result of the inside chatter. He has to do what I can’t. Let go, let God, and relax – Be Still and know I am God. Ps 40:10.
My Lord uses Meds to reduce some of the excess chatter but then He also leaves just enough for me to make a choice to let him handle all of it & the worries that the Inside chatter creates. As someone said earlier… Some days are easier & others are harder. But I’m thankful for the distance He’s brought me in a yr & a half of more learning to trust & rely on and in Him for the extra chatter quieting.
I have a version of your unglued book on my kindle and really enjoy it when I can stop to read it. I would love to have the whole series that’s in your giveaway here. I’m looking fwd to your broadcast today & I really appreciate your Fb posts. 🙂 thank you for embarking on the ministry God put in front of you & being real with what happens inside us. 🙂
Okay God, I hear you! This is a conversation I’ve been having with Him (let’s call it Positive Chatter, hehe), asking Him why I let myself think so negatively and work myself up so much.
With me, the inside chatter is like a slow-moving storm just creeping into my subconcious. I might notice the wind picking up here and there but it never fails to surprise me at how quickly I look up and out of nowhere I’m underneath dark skies and gail-force winds. That’s what inside chatter is like for me.
My inside chatter is never up lifting and most days is very hard to ignore. I have learned to look closer at myself in all situations and not rely on what my inside chatter depicts.
The chatter I hear tends to be questioning, like Satan did to Eve, way back in the beginning, “Did God REALLY say He forgives you?”, funny how even after thousands of years, he uses the same tricks, and even less funny is that we still listen and maybe even question a little. I love that God’s power is so great though, His love so unending, forgiving, merciful and his love so immeasurable, His Words are all I should be listening to.
My “inside chatter” is always telling me that I am never good enough. I will never find anyone to accept me for who I am and I will never find love. These are constant struggles I deal with on a daily basis. I know that someday I will find true love and I know that I will also find someone who will accept me for who I am. I know I am worthy because God created me. God has made me who I am not because he wanted me to suffer…but that he knew I would be able to stand the test of time. I have been through so much in my life and I wish that “inside chatter” would just go away for a day and let me think in peace.
I am struggling but trying to learn everyday that I am a positive influence to someone in their life, even if it’s the smallest take. I am trying to turn my “inside chatter” around to be more positive but it’s not easy.
Inside chatter is definitely something I’ve struggled with many times! Even though I have “grown up” I still have those moments when I let not being asked or invited get to me. On one hand I am confident in who I am and don’t “need” to be included in everything. On the other hand, who doesn’t want to be the center of everyone’s world?! Looking forward to this and what a great gift!
Well, I typed this whole amazing comment … and when I sent it the page was “unavaliable” .. and now I can’t remember half of what I typed, but that’s ok!! 🙂
All I can say is that having lived a rough life being a mom of 5 kids myself 2 my own and 3 step kids(their mother died in 06). Being told you’re not doing a good enough job from in laws, having been told I’m not good enough from my father for years, I understand how the little voice in your head can be devastating. Learning how to over come it and push it back to where you don’t hear it that’s the tough thing, but it can be done!! One thing I’ve learned lately is Perseverance I have a little reminder sitting on my desk so that each time I see him I know that I can overcome anything .. I call him Percy!! Here he is with my latest Bible Study http://instagram.com/p/VBzlSgoaN7/
I have struggled with inside chatter for as long as I can remember. This year has been a very transformative year for me. After reading Unglued twice and soon to be 3 times because I am leading a small group on it, and doing some other bible study work, I have finally learned how to quiet the inside chatter. My value does not come from people, things, or what I do. It comes from my creator. In His eyes I am a masterpiece. When I start hearing that negative chatter, I ask God His perspective through prayer or His Word. I no longer let this world define me. It is a fallen world but my home is not here. I belong to and with my Father.
I have learned that you can’t always listen to the inside chatter. Satan uses this to get you off track. He’ll bring to your remembrance the people who may have said negative things…or use the thought of “remember that time……” God can also use the inside chatter to let you know that He cares and to calm you down. You just have to figure out which inside chatter to listen to and which to ignore.
There is only one place that the negative chatter comes from and that is Satan. He is finding that little wormhole and getting into our head causing problems. Sometimes I scream at Satan to get out of my head!
Still struggle with those inner voices, the devil whispering in my ear, but the knowledge and truth that God is the only one who matters, and he loved me, even when I am unloveable
At our church girl’s club, we’re spending this entire year focusing on the theme: “Think Right! Win the Fight!”. Based upon the truth found in Philippians 4:8, we learning to think on the things which are pleasing to God.
I love how God continues to bring additional resources, i.e. – the webcast, to keep my thoughts focused on right thinking. I’m looking forward to listening in on tomorrow’s conversation. 🙂
For so long I have carried guilt and shame for my past mistakes and stumbles. As I would work hard on the outside, on the inside I was telling myself I was getting exactly what I deserved. I didn’t deserve love or understanding or the feeling of belonging because I was just too big of a screw up. But the worst of it has been in my marriage. Because I wasn’t a virgin when I got married, I was convinced that the love my husband gave was as good as I deserved. When he didn’t meet my needs, I internalized it as punishment for not being good enough to love. And now, I have felt the love, the only love that can fully fill my heart. As a child of God, his love is the only perfect love I need to be fully loved. The rest is just extra.
Sometimes it seems satan talks the loudest but only because I forgot to “Be still” and listen to what God had to say first.
I’d love to read these books!
I struggle with this over and over again. Constant battle with my heart and mind of whether I’m good enough or worthy enough. I try to tell myself I don’t care and it doesn’t matter, yet I repeatedly find myself in tears….because it does…at least to me.
I struggle so deeply with accepting God’s love. Thought he hated me….so hard for me to grasp my identity in him. I can’t seem to get out of performance mode. My whole life has been built around performing in order to be loved so how could God be any different?
It’s taken some time, but I’ve had to learn that I’m enough–Regardless of what my inside chatter says. Enough of a wife, enough of a mother, a sister, a daughter. I can always be better, but I’m enough.
I am my own worst enemy when it comes to inside chatter! And it seems the more I allow my self to do it the worse it gets. I can take one small comment and turn it into a huge hurt. I thank you for this posting today and I pray for continued imperfect progress in dealing with my inside chatter!
I have learned that I am my hardest and worst critic. I am harder on myself than anyone else, which can cause me to get depressed and wanting to give up. Then I remember God’s forgiveness and that I should forgive myself just the same.
I was born with a physical disability resulting in my being a triple amputee. Therefore, I have often dealt with being left out because I was different and because I had medical restrictions. As a teen I went through a series of failed surgeries and found myself in a situation like Job and overnight my friends went on without me. After the shock and grief of my loss, I was able to realize that I too had excluded many people from being my friend for a variety of lessor reasons. It became my focus of my remaining teen years to always try to recognize everyone as a potential friend and to try to include everyone, even those old friends who had not been the friends that I had hoped in my time of need.
Having made inclusion the focus of my relationships, it has meant a lot more acceptance by some of the most beautiful people in the world. Anytime I am thinking why me? Whatever the situation, I try to think, how can I help others who are having similair struggles…it really opens my eyes to all God’s blessings.
Inside chatter is such a good description. I have anxiety disorder & it’s easy for me to get caught up in doubt, planning, second guessing every action, conversation, & relationship I may have during a day. I often fight it or get caught in it at night when I try to go to sleep. I have found God has to calm it cuz my tricks usually don’t work all the time. But I try to settle the chatter with verses and encouraging songs & prayer. The Holy Spirit has become more real to me than ever before as a result of the inside chatter. He has to do what I can’t. Let go, let God, and relax – Be Still and know I am God. Ps 40:10.
My Lord uses Meds to reduce some of the excess chatter but then He also leaves just enough for me to make a choice to let him handle all of it & the worries that the Inside chatter creates. As someone said earlier… Some days are easier & others are harder. But I’m thankful for the distance He’s brought me in a yr & a half of more learning to trust & rely on and in Him for the extra chatter quieting.
I have a version of your unglued book on my kindle and really enjoy it when I can stop to read it. I would love to have the whole series that’s in your giveaway here. I’m looking fwd to your broadcast today & I really appreciate your Fb posts. 🙂 thank you for embarking on the ministry God put in front of you & being real with what happens inside us. 🙂
I have learned that what i say (to myself) can be used against me by the enemy. I have to capture those wrong thoughts and correct them with TRUTH and know what is REAL according to God and not take in my own flawed negative thoughts.
I didn’t realize how much inside chatter I have until this moment. I have been wondering why even though I feel God calling me to step out of my box and do specific things I can’t do it. It’s like my feet are firmly planted and can’t be moved and I hear “what are you thinking? You can’t do that. You aren’t qualified.” In my heart I know that God is calling me to step out in faith but my inner chatter keeps preventing it. I can’t wait for this webinar.
This is certainly something I could use some help with in my life! Thanks!
I was reading to my children this morning Pv 18:21 and how we also speak death or life over ourselves by what we think to ourselves and whether we believe what God says in truth over us or satan. So our spoken words and those inner words can both either line up with life or death.
In my life the “tapes” (I call them) play over and over and they are NOT generally positive. I have felt like my whole life I have never been enough. I was adopted at birth and I really feel like that lack of a ‘connection’ has caused me to feel like I am not good enough in all areas. I don’t blame or look to anyone else to fix this. I know it is my issue and I am working on it. I didn’t get here overnight so I know i will not get better overnight either. I do need to fix this because I do not want to pass this along to my three beautiful boys. I just feel like I constantly attract people to me that aren’t exactly people who treat me the way I should be treated. All my life people constantly walk in and we are connected and then for some reason or another they leave and leave me another reason to reitterate the negative feelings and thoughts I have for myself. The cycle needs to be broken and in my head I know that my Father, God, is the only person who knows me and loves me unconditionally and I do not need anyone else to show me the kind of love He has for me. I will get there and with each step I will perservere!!
I have always had a problem with negative inside chatter, telling me, “you’re not a good enough mom/friend/wife/sister/daughter” Anything that I am, negative chatter has always told me I am not good enough at, and it always leaves me feeling desperate to be better, often ending up trying to be a people pleaser and wearing myself thin. I’m realizing more and more that all this negative chatter is coming from satan and the more I listen to it, the more it comes. However, I have yet to overcome it. Really looking forward to the webcast, this is something I really need.
I have learned that I am my hardest and worst critic. I am harder on myself than anyone else, which can cause me to get depressed and wanting to give up. Then I remember God’s forgiveness.
Inside chatter is a downfall for so many of us moms. Leaning on his wisdom is the only true voice I need to hear. Thank you for all your words of encouragement.
When reading the book “Captivating” by John and Stasi Eldredge, I learned that from the time we are young, the enemy is on a mission to make us believe lies about ourselves. Once we believe them we are in agreement with him that these lies are true. Once I started to recognize what these lies were in my own life, I was able then to consciously combat those lies with the truth…what GOD says about me! Its not always easy, but the choice is mine. 🙂
I’ve learned that inside chatter is that running tape, or dialogue, that’s constantly playing in my head. Even as I type this, I find myself thinking, “I shouldn’t even bother to leave a comment. I don’t have anything that great to say. Everyone else’s comments are so much better, so I couldn’t possibly win.” Those intrusive thoughts come to mind so effortlessly, without my even planning or seeking them out. Meanwhile, it takes deliberate effort to combat those thoughts with the truth of God’s love for me. I must stop myself, recognize that the inside chatter isn’t the truth, but rather an attempt by the enemy to distract me from God, and replace the chatter with God’s truth. If only I could replace the automatic chatter that’s on a continuous loop in my mind with the words of God. God needs to be the soundtrack of my life.
Inside chatter…something I feel I am almost always at war with! Satan desires to tear down and destroy; however, my God is stronger and more powerful than any and He desires me. I want Him to consume my every thought. I am reminded to “take captive” every thought and give it to Him. Praise Jesus I can depend on Him! He is faithful!!!
Inside chatter can be a battle for women no matter what your age. I try to remember who I am in Christ as well as go through the eight points in Phillipines 4 taking every thought captive. Worship the Lord when I begin to gve into the chatter. We were created to worship God and this will generally change my thought process. The Lord loves us so much and He values us. He desires for us to spend time with Him. He delights in blessing His daughters.
Thank you for sharing! I also struggle with the “you’re not a good mom” thoughts. I know that I can do all things through Christ!
I love your posts! Inside chatter is one of the BIGGEST obstacles I battle daily. One little thought or comment taken the wrong way can start me on a complete downhill battle that can sometimes take hours to get over. Sadly satan knows this is the one area that needs the most work building strongholds. I pray daily to be able to stop the negative thoughts from building up before they start.
I have always struggled with inside chatter 🙁
I am even creative enough to make up inside chatter out of nothing! I tend to think up things others say, think, or believe about me. I think I am over sensitive to what others are thinking or doing and always tend to personalize it. If someone I come in contact with is having a bad day, I can some how come up with a way that it is due to something I have said or done. I am now learning that I don’t need to pick up the burden of others, I know that I can turn to God and rely on his love for me and share this love with those I come in contact with!
I have come a long ways, but no doubt that sometimes we let little things define who we are. Reality is that I’m so much more than I can ever imagine, I been born again and the Lord reminds me every day that I was worth dying for!! I sit still, I get quiet and I can hear him telling me how much He loves me!! God bless beautiful lady and thank you for the encouragement!!!
Oh the dreaded inside chatter…it’s a daily struggle. Some nights, it’s hard to fall asleep with all the “noise” in my head. Lies usually. Just this past weekend, I had these same feelings that you spoke of. Ny father (once again) told me on two different occasions how stupid what I had said was and it cut deep. I was brought back to that vulnerable little girl who was told many many times growing up how worthless I was. It’s hard not to stillImbelieve that. Thank you for this reminder, Lysa. I@
what i learned on how to shut off the idle chatter in your head.( the devil) you can be the best women you want to be you just have to die for it. die as i mean you need to quit feeding it. You see every time you give in to the desires of your flesh, you feed it. But every time you press through rand starve those desires, a little bit of your flesh dies. BY getting in to Gods word and know the truth about your self. nothing but Gods word is the truth and the TRUTH WILL MAKE YOU FREE!! Also change your perspective on how you look at things, not every thing has to be negative and nasty. look at it how Jesus would look at it.
I have always heard a voice that says “you are not good enough” I have to fight the urge to believe’s satan’s lies.
Inside chatter is one of the obstacles I battle daily. One little thought or comment taken the wrong way can start me on a complete downhill battle that can sometimes take hours to get over. Sadly satan knows this is the one area that needs the most work building strongholds. I pray daily to be able to stop the negative thoughts from building up before they start.
I did a Bible Study 6 or 7 years ago. The main thing that I learned was that most of the inside chatter is lies(when we create scenarios and ideas of what we think people are thinking in our head, we don’t know what is really true). God tells us to focus on whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things(Philippians 4:8). Memorizing this verse had made it easier to quiet the inside chatter.
Philippians 4:4-8 has become one of my favorite Bible passages!
My inside chatter never seems to stop chattering! Some days I give in and believe it and some days I can get past it and still be able to smile that day. With the world’s chatter also chiming in sometimes it’s hard to not let it get me down. I know God loves me, but I am living in this world which is ruthless and cruel and sometimes it’s just too much to take!
I have carried around every negative thing I have ever heard about myself for as long as I can remember. I am learning to let go of those hurts and let in the promises of God that claim me as His for who I am, not who I wish I was. It is a long process and is not easy to erase all the negative tapes that I have running through my head, but step by step I hope to replace all the negative chatter with biblical truths.
Inside chatter is such a good description. I have anxiety disorder & it’s easy for me to get caught up in doubt, planning, second guessing every action & conversation I may have during a day. I often get caught in it at night when I try to go to sleep. I have found God has to calm it cuz my tricks usually don’t work all the time. But I try to settle the chatter with verses and encouraging songs & prayer. The Holy Spirit has become more real to me than ever before as a result of the inside chatter. He has to do what I can’t. Let go, let God, and relax – Be Still and know I am God. Ps 40:10.
My Lord uses Meds to reduce some of the excess chatter but then He also leaves just enough for me to make a choice to let him handle all of it & the worries that the Inside chatter creates. As someone said earlier… Some days are easier & others are harder. But I’m thankful for how He’s teaching me to learn to trust & rely on & in Him for the extra chatter quieting.
I would love to have the whole series of Unglued that’s in your giveaway here. I’m looking fwd to your broadcast tomorrow & I really appreciate your Fb posts. 🙂 thank you for embarking on the ministry God put in front of you & being real with what happens inside us. 🙂
Day by day I’m allowing God’s truths to become my inside chatter. It’s hard sometimes to shut out the lies of the enemy but with God’s help I can win! Moment by moment, day by day!
I have struggled with inside chatter for as long as I can remember. Last year was a very transformative year for me. After reading Unglued twice and soon to be 3 times because I am leading a small group on it, and doing other bible study work, I have finally learned how to quiet the inside chatter. My value does not come from people, things, or what I do. It comes from my Creator. In His eyes I am a masterpiece. When I start hearing that negative chatter, I ask God His perspective through prayer or His Word. I no longer let this fallen world define me.
Inside chatter can be so loud somedays! I always have to remember to be thankful for all my blessings and even my problems. There is always someone with more problems than I have.
So thankful for these devotions. The inside chatter in my head has always been a problem for me. From not thinking that I can stick to a weight loss plan to not being good enough to teach a class at church. But these devotions really do help to remind me that I am not alone.
I think I am often my own worst enemy. I have struggled with a progressive neuromuscular disease the past several years. I LOVE being a wife and mom, but I struggle with not being able to be the mom I really desire to be, or think I should be, sometimes because of my definition, but often based on what other moms are doing. Either the moms of my kids’ friends or the moms I might read about on facebook or blogs. The mom I am and the mom I always dreamed about being look different now. However, I am reminded by my children that they feel loved. And that happens often as they snuggle next to me while I’m resting. I continue to remember that God promises to work ALL things for good. And He will take care of my precious family.
I would LOVE this 🙂
Inside chatter haunts me most days. I always remind myself that I am a new person in Christ. Jason Grays song, I Am New always soothes my soul and reminds me that I am NOT who I was as every day I am striving to loose more and more of myself. Thanks be to God for His life changing power!
If my inside chatter does not line up with the word of God, I need to throw it out and not give the enemy room to grow in my head or life!
I have had plenty of thia inside chatter when I was younger. Not so much anymore. I know who I am in Christ, so I don’t let things get to me like they uaed to.
Inside chatter can be so loud somedays! I always have to remember to be thankful for all my blessings and my problems. There is always someone with more problems than I have.
I have heard lots of “inside chatter” over the years, still do. My devotion time is the only time I don’t. hmm guess I should have more devotion time. I never seem to be able to not listen to the negative thoughts racing through my mind. I know I’m not good enough. Thank God he sent Jesus to save me with his grace so I can go to heaven even though I’m not good enough.
It is amazing how I can defeat myself with negative inside chatter than even my worst enemy could attempt. Keeping that in mind I try to focus on the positive chatter. To rally back just as strong.
As a foster momma on adoption #4 I am under several microscopes. Everyone and their case worker have a say in my parenting and an opinion of my based on a stack of DHS paper work. I have to dive into His word daily and swim in the truth that I was chosen and He is at work in and through me despite my faults and flaws. We are who God says we are; beloved.
Inside chatter is one of the obstacles I battle daily. One little thought or comment taken the wrong way can start me on a complete downhill battle that can sometimes take hours to get over. Sadly satan knows this is the one area that needs the most work building strongholds.
I truly need to stop listening to the inside chatter that I have feed with more and more thoughts. I need to start to listen to the holy spirit and let Him fill me up. Easy to say very hard to do.
I have had plenty of thia inside chatter when I was younger. Not so much anymore. I know who I am in Christ, so I don’t let things get to me like they used to.
I was & still am that little girl. I have taken care of people so long I’m not sure if I know how to take care of myself.
for my entire life I have been burdened with “inside chatter”….I was born with perfectionistic tendencies as well as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder…genetic in nature..which I feel exacerbates the negative feelings that I experience.
starting kindergarten at age 4…just under the deadline.. I can still recall the crushing abandonment of my Mom leaving me on that first day…I had always been a Momma’s girl…I even began to cry until I was given a cookie & distracted with the toys…:).
the nuns.. in the Catholic school that I attended for a year and a half before we moved..were basically instilling the fear of God in me rather than his Love…Hell was emphasized as punishment for doing wrong
we moved to an area where I started public school..my teachers would write notes on my report cards that I would becomet upset if I couldn’t perform a task to perfection
I have to admit though that educationally I was furthur ahead than my classmates and received the top honors award in 6th grade
I attended college in 1972 and pretty much majored in Partying 101..that “inside chatter” was subdued by alcohol which ..at the time..I thought was the be-all /cure-all to that “inside chatter” I did receive an Associates Degree but didn’t give my education my entire focus or as my Mom would say apply myself to the best of my ability
my Mom’s frustration in my lack of direction & focus led me to take the NYS Beginning Office Workers Exam which she took with me just so I would take it
after working some dead-end jobs I was offered a job for NYS job out of town…that “positive” inside chatter pointed me in that direction and I was employed by NYS for 29+ YEARS…maybe my decisions were not as comparable as continuing my college education or just maybe it was God’s will that I persue this road..I didn’t realize until after my Mom’s death that a friend of hers told me that she would get so excited when I would come to visit..I never quite realized how upset she was that I had left home & how happy she was to see me..I was too busy focusing on myself I guess
“they” say “if I knew what I knew then that I know now but hindsite is 20/20 which means perfect “eye” vision…I don’t thnk we are born with 20/20 anything…only through our experiences do we learn from our mistakes..and although difficult get up again
even though I continue to experience those negative “inner voices’ from time to time I have learned that my mind can only focus on one thought successfully at a time..I’m learning to “focus” my efforts on what God wants me to accomplish for Him in my life regardless of what any body else thinks or feels about me
I have hope & faith that even though these “inner voices” won’t completely disappear but diminish significantly if my focus returns to the source of my being the Lord my God…
just maybe its a good thing that we sometimes hear them as it is a reminder that if we hang in there we can overcome them and anything negative or evil that comes our way…
I think that I am often my own worst enemy. I hear the inside chatter and I just roll with it. I often find myself alone because that is where I have put myself. Mostly because I have found myself in the pink shirt situation in the past and let it define the moment and me… but getting back out of that can be extremely difficult. I am trying more and more to realize that people are human and are not purposefully hurting me… it is Satan whispering his nasty little words in my ear… I pray that I can get that under control and be happier with myself in those moments. I am looking forward to the webcast tomorrow.
I really have to fight inside chatter, having grown up in a very cliquish school. We were poor and not part of the “in” crowd. To this day, I react negatively to perceived snubs…but then I remember who I am in Christ and that I’m the apple of HIS eye and people come and go and allegiances change, but Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow.
The Inside chatter ruins so much. It is a struggle to shake it off. My ex used to put down my skills and question me on so many of my runs as a paramedic. I have been divorced for 6 years and still can hear him saying I am stupid and do not know what I am doing.
I really appreciate you sharing. It’s hard to remember sometimes that God defines our worth not fickle people. I can remember siting at home during the weekends asking myself “why didn’t they choose me?” I often times find myself in my own head full of negativity, but then I fill it with the word of God and my entire attitude and mood change and I remember how loved, accepted and special I am really am.
I’ve learned that I have to talk to myself, not listen to myself. I have worked at discerning my own untrue thoughts and speaking Truth to myself right then and there. God’s Truth!
Love today’s post about “inside chatter”. This is a constant struggle for me. It appears as though I’m not the only one. I’ve spent a vast majority of my life struggling with the inside chatter that has always told me I wasn’t good enough for something, which was usually confirmed by some sort of outside chatter that was hurtful. It wasn’t until I came to Christ 2 years ago that I truly felt like I was good enough for something or someone. It’s take me a long time to learn that God loves me just the way that I am, and HE needs ME to help further his kingdom. I’m so thankful for being the daughter of a King!!
It is amazing how I can defeat myself with negative inside chatter than even my worst enemy could attempt. Keeping that in mind I try to focus on the positive chatter, to rally back just as strong.
I have to re-word the chatter that takes place in my head. ” I AM worthy! I AM a child of the most High God”. Some days I have to chant it.
I have had plenty of this inside chatter when I was younger. Not so much anymore. I know who I am in Christ, so I don’t let things get to me like they used to.
When I find myself being challenged by the devil with negative “inside chatter” I cling to Romans 12:2 “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is- his good, pleasing and perfect will.” I also remind myself that everyone is a child of God, and somehow thinking about the person who is intimidating to me as a child no longer makes them intimidating. 🙂 Blessings! Edie
Unfortunately, I have come to identify that my “Inside Chatter” is very negative about myself. Now that I have recognized that, I am praying and trying to change. I have a daughter that is 3 and I definitely want her thoughts to be more positive about herself…
Inside chatter can either make or break your day…and it often begins with how we use our personal and quiet time in the morning. Devotions often make that inside chatter positive in nature and full of encouragement when the world seeks to burst our happy personal bubble with sadness and despair. Taking our inside chatter to God every day for a spiritual “tune up” allows God to recreate the parts of our bubble that have been burst by life the day before and maybe eventually, with God’s help, our bubbles will be nearly impenetrable to the voice of negativity and doubt that creeps in so often.
I appreciate you sharing. It’s hard to remember sometimes that God defines our worth not fickle people. I can remember siting at home during the weekends asking myself “why didn’t they choose me?” I often times find myself in my own head full of negativity, but then I fill it with the word of God and my entire attitude and mood change and I remember how loved, accepted and special I am really am.
The loudest and hardest negative inside chatter is in my parents’ voices which they continue to reinforce to this day. They let me know regularly how disappointed they are in me. I am a stay-at-home mom and we live very frugally b/c of this and we are believers. They think I should be working outside the home and get offended when we put God’s will for our lives ahead of their own. I know I am full with Christ and doing God’s work. I still desire my parents’ love and approval. I always do God’s will over theirs, but still feel sad inside when they can’t see how great He is.
It is amazing how the chatter doesn’t stop after high school. I am 33 and am back in college and over the years through work and school it seems to just keep going. What is it about being a woman that makes us so insecure that we can read so many things out of minor insignificant things or even nothing. We know we shouldn’t listen and let those things absorb into our being but we just can’t seem to stop ourselves. Me included. I would love to be able to turn it down and off. I especially want to teach my little girl better before she really gets into the thick of the inside chatter issues.
I learned about 20 years ago that as Christians it is so futile and not necessary to drag the ball and chain around of bad habits when Christ already died not just for our sins but also broke/destroyed those chains. He gave us freedom from those with His death and resurrection, so as not to hinder us in our daily walk with Him!!
I have learned that most of the inside chatter is all lies. Lies to bring me down and filling empty instead of full in Christ. I have to learn to weed out the lies and listen to what God is trying to say to me about my identity then I find peace of mind and soul.
It’s hard to remember sometimes that God defines our worth not fickle people. I can remember siting at home during the weekends asking myself “why didn’t they choose me?” I often times find myself in my own head full of negativity, but then I fill it with the word of God and my entire attitude and mood change and I remember how loved, accepted and special I am really am.
I have to remind myself daily that the LORD is in charge and I can accept the things that are out of my control and not ACT out of control! So with doubt and satan try to fill my mind with worthless chatter I can remind myself that only HE knows my plans! I have to stay on HIS track.
Inside chatter is such a good description. I easily get caught up in doubt, planning, second guessing every action & conversation I may have during a day. I often get caught in it at night when I try to go to sleep. I have found God has to calm it cuz my tricks usually don’t work all the time. But I try to settle the chatter with verses and encouraging songs & prayer. The Holy Spirit has become more real to me than ever before as a result of the inside chatter. He has to do what I can’t. Let go, let God, and relax – Be Still and know I am God. Ps 40:10.
As someone said earlier… Some days are easier & others are harder. But I’m thankful for how He’s teaching me to learn to trust & rely on & in Him for the extra chatter quieting.
I’m looking fwd to your broadcast tomorrow & I really appreciate your Fb posts. 🙂 thank you for embarking on the ministry God put in front of you & being real with what happens inside us. 🙂
I had a huge amount of inside chatter yesterday and it did nothing but bring me down. It was revealed to me in a small, what I thought, an insignificate moment that it was the enemy doing his stuff. It was then that I went back into the Word and found that I am still loved and that I am the best wife for my husband, the best mother for my children and the best person for my ministry. It is all to do with MY walk with Jesus and no one else.
When I was in Bible college I made a friend and we were inseperable. When she graduated and moved home we didn’t talk for a year. I tried yo contact her but she ignored me, or so I thought. Inside I would tell myself that I had done something wrong and wasn’t good enough. I must have been a horrible friend she didn’t feel encouraged her spiritually. I cried a lot over it.
h a hard time and was unable to contactme
I had a hard time with all that chatter, as a child and a teenager. As a new mom, that chatter came back loud and clear. A dear family friend gave me a flyer one time that said “God Don’t Make Junk”. I would hear the negative and then had to remind myself of this. My walk with God has helped so much with those voices.
I JUST went thru this a week ago today!! In my Women’s Bible study group, of all places! I was SURE that this one lady just does not like me…she won’t make eye contact with me, she doesn’t engage me in conversation…although she does do all this with the other ladies in our group. It was making me crazy, and a little mad! I had not done anything to her, but show kindness. It was really making me upset, what had I done?!? I spoke with my husband and prayed for guidance on this. I came to the realization that, I may never know for sure if she likes me or what her issue may be, but I’ve got to stop focusing on her and start focusing on the good parts. Everyone else engages me, with fellowship, laughter, and kindness. I am praying that she will do the same eventually. It’s all I can do…leave it up to God and keep on my path. But the inside chatter is crazy awful!! It can lead you straight out of the good thoughts and right into the bad ones…
The inside chatter is something I believe that we all have to come against, me included. It is that self-talk that you are having with yourself and it is what you do with it and how you overcome it that is important. I have to choose to either go wtih whatit is saying or I can go with what the word says about me or my situation and that takes practice/walking it out.
Raised in a little tiny town in SE Idaho, I was related to everybody! We all went to a little, red, brick elementary school that most of our parents had gone to and we went there from Kindergarten through the sixth grade. It was heavenly at that little, red, brick school. The cook specialized your meal if we needed or wanted 🙂 something different, the school secretary was just like all of our grandmas. She welcomed us with hugs and loves. We were all pretty much in for a big schock when 7th grade rolled around. We left our precious little piece of heaven on Earth only to feel as if we had been put out to the wolves… atleast that’s how I felt. It. Was. Scary! I was the one of only two girls in my class of 6 coming from our little town where we ended up having to ride a bus for about an hour to go into a bigger town to join about 50 other kids. All of my past-classmates made new friends and I was all alone. This transition was just terrible! My 7th grade year was a nightmare because of, as you posted, this inside chatter. I made it all so much worse on myself than it really was. I was a total outcast – but I also didn’t really try and be friendly – I had isolated myself from all of them because of these major differences in outside appearances. There I was with my wranglers and sweaters, short hair and braces – there they were with all their B.U.M Equipment sweatshirts, silk shirts, adorable little, denim skirts and long permed hair. What I went through in the 7th grade surprisingly turned around in the 8th grade when all those girls realized I could play basketball and I realized we all weren’t as different as I thought. Having gone through all those tough times did do some major work on softening my heart towards any outcast that ever came along and still, to this day, I’ll remember how I felt and I instantly include whoever is by themself. AND if by chance I am, yet again, the outcast — as this has happened — I pray to God to help me find it in my heart to love them anyway … because that’s what my Jesus does for me everyday. I also find if I am abiding in His Word, I’m not as susceptable to listening to the lies Satan feeds me (inside chatter). It really helps me identify lies from His Truth. I adore your work, Lysa! Thank you for this opportunity. <3sj
I have learned to listen for God’s voice-you are loved, made for a purpose etc…to get rid of other thoughts…that try to come in and discourage:)
Wow, that really brought back some memories for me too. I, thankfully, didn’t have a childhood full of not being invited and having that inner chatter, but it only takes ONE time to get to your psyche. I have come a long way in realizing that as long as my God loves me (and I know he always, always does), that those times don’t matter…of course, as a young child, I didn’t have this insight…Whew, sure wish I did!!! 🙂
I struggled with this alot growing up. Still do at times as an adult. Always wanting to be included and liked by everyone. Now that I have kids I try to instill in them confidence and assure them that not everyone will like them or include them but that doesn’t make them any less valuable. Still letting go of those negative internal voices is not always easy.
I was & still am that little girl.
Inside chatter…it can be horribly destructive, if I let it. Such a struggle when we try to please everyone but the one that matters…my God. Looking forward to the webcast!
Sometimes I wish the inside chatter came with a mute button. When I feel overwhelmed with this obnoxious & destructive noise in my head I stop and audibly tell Satan to leave me alone and ask the Holy Spirit to fill me Christ centered thoughts. If I leave the window to my mind open even just a crack, he will try to turn up the chatter volume, but keeping focused on His word eventually shuts the noise off.
Loved this. I will have my daughter who is in high school read it, also! She is super kind to her friends and doesn’t have a single enemy, however, she is sometimes left out of gatherings. I tell her it’s not as big a deal as it seems. As you said in your blog, my daughter just wasn’t on the friend’s mind when the invitations were made. That’s all. It’s so important to remind our children that they ARE loved, and liked. Sometimes, our friends forget us but it does not define us.
I’ve been dealing with “inside chatter” for quite a while now. Seems to sneak up on me. I notice that I experience it more when i’ve been spending time with a certain negative group of people. I start worrying that they say the same things about me that they do others (which i’m sure they do)…..I can’t wait to hear what you have to say about this topic of interest.
I love this blog! I have that “inside chatter” all the time. I now realize that a moment in time doesn’t define the woman I am now. Sometimes you feel as though you have a sign on you saying you just don’t measure up. This blog has changed my outlook. Thank you~
It is a daily struggle but I always try to listen to God’s voice and hear what he is saying
I deal with this daily. Especially since I’m dealing with Axiety and Depression. The voices tell me I’m guilty and unworthy. I am filling my mind with God’s Word daily and trying to remain focused on His promises to help me drown out the other voices. That’s the only way to get through this by focusing on identity with Christ. Thank you for your post today.
There is a comment that artistic people often use about them selves. “I am my own worst critique.” Being that I dabble in drawing and can bury myself in my poetry – I get that statement, I was hard on myself. Even under others’ praises. I would look at my past drawings or read an early poem and frown, then I’d judge, then I lost interest. I had to realize I couldn’t have started off perfect – we all grow, change, develop, and evolve as we go through life. Now I’ve gotten better a silencing my inner critique, as long as I do what God lies on my heart – I can draw or write it into infinity.
Inside chatter has always been my biggest battle. That little voice that gets in there and all but knocks me flat on my rear. Lately it has been more positive but every now and again that negative comes in. I have learned that I am better than that and if I want to succeed, my inside chatter needs to be full of peace and joy from Christ. Daily scripture reading and keeping the junk out really help!
I have come to realize how easily I allow the enemy to tell me lies about all aspects of my life. Too often I find myself believing the lies about what kind of person I am. I have to daily remind myself these are lies to bring me down! I have to look to God for the truth!!!
Like all other aspects of life…accountability is vital!! We were not meant to live (or think) in isolation. When we talk about and share our struggles with those whom we trust to hold us accountable, we receive encouragement, wisdom, and Truth. When it comes to the “inside chatter”…Jesus and His Word are my accountability!!!! Taking those thoughts captive and bringing them under the authority of TRUTH!!!!
Inside chatter is something that, until about a year ago, I had no idea really existed. I heard about it through Joyce Meyer, and the entire concept of having myself being my own worst enemy by the way I talk to myself was completely foreign to me. I grew p talking to myself in my head, and always thought of myself as my own best friend. But once I heard a conference that Joyce had spoke at, and said that our inner voice is often speaking against us, if we are not careful to keep it in check. This really got me thinking! I watched and listened to my inner voice. It kept saying terrible things! Problem was, I believed them! I thought I deserved the bad things in my life, I thought I horrifying to look at, I thought I was grossly over weight, I thought I was a terrible parent, I thought I failed at all of life. I believed all the lies. Over the last year, God has placed some extremely strong and spiritually healthy women in my life. These women have helped me work through some of the processes of working through my past, my life, understanding the lies and helping me understand God’s truth about me and for me. It’s been a huge process, and I know it will never been completed until Christ comes for me. But it is freeing! I love to learn on my own and through books and through the lives and guidance of my women!
I like to remind myself of the fact the I am the righteousness of God through Christ when those negative thoughts creep in.
“Inside chatter” can be both very good and very bad. The bad negative ‘chatter’ is obviously from satan not God. God is the author of truth not lies, so it is our job to seek God’s wisdom when discerning what “chatter” is truth.
Mine used to come from the “friend” issues ie: not getting invited. But now it has more to do with my abilities as a mom & housewife (or my lack of abilities as my mind often tells me)
I wish I had advice on how I get passed the inside chatter but I struggle with this daily. I have constant inside chatter going on about my weight and health issues and on top of all that I have endured a terrible friendship catastrophe over the past two years and whenever I find myself getting close to someone or beginning to trust again I get pulled back into the thought it will all happen again and I won’t ever get back friendships like I “thought” I had. I guess the inside chatter often deludes me into the thoughts of “why would anybody care” I don’t sit around and mope by any means as I am a busy mom of two active kids who keep me hopping most of the time. If I could pin down one thing that helps me when these thoughts arise though it would be that I do recognize it to be the devil’s work and just pray and cry out to The Lord for him to heal those places in me that cause this hurt and discontentment.
Wow that hit home, my reminder of being told you will never amount to anything without me, no one will want you, etc. Thought I was not good enough for anyone but that is not true because my father in heaven loves me and he has a plan for me. He blessed me with a wonderful husband who loves me for me and the Lord has given me strength and confidence to be me and please only him. He has given me a purpose to shine his love on other women in my path and let them know they are beautiful, loved and matter.
I wish I had advice on how I get passed the inside chatter but I struggle with this daily. I have constant inside chatter going on about my weight and health issues and on top of all that I have endured a terrible friendship catastrophe over the past two years and whenever I find myself getting close to someone or beginning to trust again I get pulled back into the thought it will all happen again and I won’t ever get back friendships like I “thought” I had. I guess the inside chatter often deludes me into the thoughts of “why would anybody care” I don’t sit around and mope by any means as I am a busy mom of two active kids who keep me hopping most of the time. If I could pin down one thing that helps me when these thoughts arise though it would be that I do reco
gnize it to be the devil’s work and just pray and cry out to The Lord for him to heal those places in me that cause this hurt and discontentment.
I have had plenty of this inside chatter when I was younger. Not so much anymore. I know who I am in Christ, so I don’t let things get to me like that anymore.
It’s always the little things that shouldn’t mean anything, but they begin a chain reaction of chatter in my mind. A stranger could make some off comment that I might shake off initially, but it grows in my mind as I ask myself, “Did I deserve that comment?” “Do all people feel this way about me?” And it continues on from there, until I am convinced I am a failure. It is then hard to pull yourself out of the hole you’ve dug for yourself!
I am so glad to have been able to stumble upon this site/blog. I have to admit that my “inside chatter” has been at times so overwhelming that I lost focus and was so distracted that I didn’t want to live. Through the Word of God and with the help of amazing mentors/speakers/sisters I have been able to come such a long way. While I struggle with the chatter every now and then it is NOTHING like what it used to be. Thank you so much for sharing your stories and for your encouraging words! I pray that others may find healing, encouragement and the ability to speak about their inside chatter in order that they may overcome their struggles!
God Bless!
As long as I can remember I have struggled with that “Inside Chatter”. I didn’t know how to deal with it in a godly way and based on His Word. I would get angry, resentful and push people away. Over the past couple years I have been working at this, God showed me that that Inside Chatter/thoughts are not from Him. And He showed me my idenity is not in others or what they think of me. Alot of praying, asking God for help to see the truth in situations that come along. I have a choice
to see things in His truth or my own. Seeing it in my own only brings pain and allows the enemy to hsve a foothold. Its a long hard process struggling fir years
I find that the less time I spend in the Word, the louder the inside chatter becomes and the more I allow it to influence me. I try to keep in mind that we are all His children and He loves us all equally – even the Bethany’s. And that if I allow myself to get frustrated with the Bethany’s of life, I am getting angry with one of God’s special creations. Who am I to do that? It doesn’t make the pain any less hurtful though it does make it heal much more quickly.
Just what I needed today, well, and everyday. Trying not to give words to thoughts so they are not born and battling inside chatter everyday. Waking up every morning, worn, and surrendering the day to God and His perfect plan. Sometimes, hourly;) Thanks for all you do, you are a blessing.
I love todays post. This makes see that when I see inside chatter that my Father still thinks I am a princesses & gave me fullness. We all at times feel as we are not liked but we can rest assure we are His & we are not just liked but loved.
I wish I had advice on how I get passed the inside chatter but I struggle with this daily. I have constant inside chatter going on about my weight and health issues and on top of all that I have endured a terrible friendship catastrophe over the past two years and whenever I find myself getting close to someone or beginning to trust again I get pulled back into the thought it will all happen again and I won’t ever get back friendships like I “thought” I had. I guess the inside chatter often deludes me into the thoughts of “why would anybody care” I don’t sit around and mope by any means as I am a busy mom of two active kids who keep me hopping most of the time. If I could pin down one thing that helps me when these thoughts arise though it would be that I do recognize it to be the devil’s work and just pray and cry out to The Lord for him to heal those places in me that cause this hurt and discontentment.
Inside chatter…its really hard to not acknowledge the pain of this….but the bigger picture is that God is telling you that you need to rely and trust a little bit more on Him….He doesn’t whisper negatives to you that is the devil and as long as you can tell the difference you will overcome the inside chatter….don’t let it bog you down there is so much you as an individual have to offer the world….you just have to believe!
Glad to see I am not the only adult who deals with the “left out” problem. I just need to remember Jesus did not leave me out when he died on the cross for us ALL! Thanks for the great post!
I have learned that self chatter is very, very powerful (for food or bad) but I have not learned to use it to my benefit. I need to learn to use self chatter to EMPOWER myself.
I have had and still have the inside chatter! I am 43 years old and still go through this.
Do they like me? Why wasn’t I invited? The list goes on and on.
Elaine
I find the harder life seems, the more inside chatter takes over my thinking. Maybe it’s really the other way around – the more inside chatter takes over, the harder life seems!
Either way I look at it, when I feel the love of God soaking into me, that same love overflows in abundance when shared with others.
I struggle daily with this as well, can’t wait to hear what you say! I believe we are daily accused by the enemy, and it very often sounds like our own thoughts and fears, or the words of a loved one!
I have struggled all my life for friendships to fill me with belonging and love and each time I think I have found it, I lose it. I only recently realized that those friendships could never fulfill me and only Jesus could. I can have fullness in Christ! Now, when I long for the friendship of another, I turn to God. I am thankful for the friendships I have in Christ but I now understand that the only true BFF is Jesus.
I used to believe that I had little or no control about my “inside chatter.” I am grateful today that I know that this is far from truth. I am capable and responsible for “taking my every thought captive” and replacing negative, hurtful, self defeating lies that at times, run rampant in my mind – and then travel to my heart and will affect my behavior. I have the ability to pick up my Bible, pray, put on Christian music, to count my blessings, call a brother or sister in Christ and to praise God and ask for help, and His peace which passes all understanding. God is SO good to me!
Thanks so much, this is exactly what i need to share with my daughter and another girl in our youth group. My daughter has experienced alot of this, with girls wanting to be in certain clicks. This will be so inspiring for her.
Philippeans 4:8 Finally, brothers,whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
Even if I can’t believe that the negative chatter inside my head is lies, I can think of things that I do know are lovely outside of myself. I not only get my head and my heart straight, but I take my focus off of myself.
That inside chatter can make or break my day! I try not to get caught up in it and say it really doesn’t matter, but then my mind dwells on it for the rest of the day and sometimes into the following days! I know i need to dwel on the Lod’s promises and not on the situation.
I have learned that self chatter is very, very powerful, for food or bad, but I have not learned to use it to my benefit. I need to learn to use self chatter to EMPOWER myself.
For me it’s the I’m “not good enough” chatter which could be anything from not a good enough mom to not a good enough Christian (and many other varying forms of not good enough).
Inside Chatter can really hurt. Years ago it was the “friends” issues, not being invited, included, or not having the right friends, enough money and on and on the list can go. Today, it has more to do with fitting into groups, or abilities. It can be very self destructive. Focusing on truth and the facts as God sees them, isn’t always easy…..but it is definitely worth it!!!
I read your Blog today and I so relate to this.. now as a full grown woman with 6 girls all grown and on thier own, my thoughts,I find, are daily ” do they Love me? why dont they answer me when I post on Face Book” I dont get to see my Grandsons who, by the way live 2 miles away.. I pray everynight for that family.
As a child in school I had similar situations like this, where everone else was always picked, I was left out. While my children were growing up, if there was a party we were giving, always personally handed invites to parents so those not going would not be hurt.
I have realized one thing I am enough, I am accepted, I am loved By Christ.
Thankyou so much an God bless Elna
My inside chatter tells me constantly that I am not good enough…It also likes to tell me that my sins are not forgiven. How could God ever forgive what I have done in my life? A lot of nights I will lay in bed and think about these things as these thoughts constantly go thru my mind
I used to listen to the “inside chatter” way too much. I still stumble and give into it every now and again. But I have learned that it is Satan trying to make me doubt myself…and others. Instead of listening to it, I turn it off and pray to God. We are all human…we all have feelings and they get hurt sometimes…but we must remember that only God can fully heal those hurts. He can fill our hearts with love that compares to none other!
After years of fighting the Inside Chatter by myself, with prayer, and with counseling, I realized there are real things that can get in the way of our hearing God. I had an anxiety disorder that had gone untreated for years. When I surrendered all I could do and went for help, I was given a medication that helped slow the “racing thoughts” enough that I could combat them with Truth one by one. I know many Christians are anti medication, and I’m not claiming this is the answer for everyone. For me, that is what it took. Being able to confront those lies with God’s truth has given me a freedom I had only dreamed of. I just needed a little help.
I am that little girl ! !
All about focus-putting focus in fullness of Christ and asking him to help me make Satans comments go silent instead of high volume. A daily battle
It creeps in so quickly
Inside chatter is still a problem for me sometimes. I’ve noticed that when I pay attention to it I become negative and my reponse to my children then becomes negative. Eventually the atmosphere of my home becomes a war zone as the inside chatter of not being good enough at anything, especially parenting, manifests in my children’s attitudes. When I refute the chatter and instead remember who I am in Christ there is much more peace inside of me as well as in my home and in my children. Inside chatter is contagious! It can be destructive or be used for building up.
We are going through the unglued series in our Sunday school class. I realized how much I participate in inside chatter, how mean I am to myself with it, how it is absolutely
Untrue, not to mention completely unfair to my relationships. I am so thankful for this awareness!
All about focus-putting focus in fullness of Christ and asking him to help me make Satans comments go silent instead of high volume.
It creeps in so quickly
I loved this post today! I’ve always dealt with the “inside chatter” as well as so many others I’ve seen commenting. Most of my life was spent worrying so much of what others thought of me, and trying to make other people happy- never wanting to be rejected or not included. I am now proud to say that with God’s help, I have been able to overcome that, and be so happy and fulfilled with His love and grace, that the “inside chatter” is something I don’t even allow myself to notice anymore.
I am a single mother of three kids. The one thing I never wanted to be. But it has also been the best thing that has ever happened to me. But I struggle daily with the inside chatter in my head. There are always triggers everywhere that get my head a talkin. It is a constintent struggle. However I know I am loved by God no matter what. When my inside chatter won’t stop I turn to God. I ask him all the question running through my head. Sometimes there are tears but in the morning I always feel better. God has become my rock.
Thanks for your blog. I love reading it.
Jenny
Oh, I have heard the inside chatter all my life. I am thankful that I now realize it is Satan’s lies. However, knowing that fact usually doesn’t make me feel better. I loved the post today, reminding me that I don’t have to be chosen by certain people. I have been chosen by GOD!! The King of Kings chose me to be his child. Wow. And also to not take things to personally. Sometimes people do things and don’t realize it hurt our feelings.
I realize I have negative messages recorded in my mind and if I’m not careful to re record a truth message, I will believe the negative. Only to realize its a big fat lie!
Insider chatter…delet it. Thanks for all the many was u encourage me! Looking forward to hearing more!
Since I was a child the inside chatter has been chatting away and has hindered me from doing things for me.
I’ve learned that the “Inside Chatter” in my life is mostly negative and self destructive. The only time it’s not is when I’m actively in The Word of God. That’s a great indicator of how often I’m studying.
Your story is something that we (women) faced back in grammar school, high school, college, and still today. I stumble into the inside chatter constantly! In similar situations, such as yours, I have felt like the “ugly duck” of the group. I have felt rejected. Not wanted. However, I have come to realize that my identity is in Christ and not in someone else’s opinion or impression of me. I have prayed for God to remove the lie and place HIS truth instead. As Casting Crowns signs “…And the voice of Truth tells me a different story.” Let us listen to His voice so that we can find Identity in HIM.
**sings
I have learned that the “chatter” I hear are emotions not fact! I feel fat, not I am fat. I feel like I don’t belong, not I don’t believe. I remember how wishy washy emotions are, and I try to do something to change the way I’m feeling, whether that is reach out and call a friend or go and workout, etc. I just started your made to crave study in my church group although I’ve read it before on my own. I would love to sport all those cool goodies to it!
I am encouraged that I am not the only one who has ever felt the impact of negative inside chatter. And I’m learning that those voices telling me I’m not good enough aren’t truth. When I see my failures as a wife, mother, etc., I have to remind myself, like Lysa said, my identity is in Christ. Not in my mistakes or failures. And I love her words in Unglued. I desperately cling to my imperfect progress.
A lot of the time I feel like I’m a little to comfortable with negative inside chatter. It’s very common. I notice my children deal with it also. I’m so ready to move past it and know who I am and where I stand in Christ!
Inside chatter sure can impact my outlook, and the best thing I’ve found to remedy negative chatter is the WORD of GOD (I just don’t always go there). Looking forward to the webcast. Blessings, Jenny C.
Inside chatter has always been my biggest battle. Lately it has been more positive but every now and again that negative comes in. I have learned that I am better than that and if I want to succeed, my inside chatter needs to be full of peace and joy from Christ. Daily scripture reading and keeping the junk out really help!
Replace those lies with the Truth! I learned a several years ago through Beth Moore that “in love” I am “blessed, chosen, accepted, redeemed and forgiven”. I still have to repeat these Truths from Ephesians to myself almost DAILY! The enemy won’t give up, but, praise God, he IS defeated!
Love the article. “inside chatter” know many who experience this and have also myself. learning to hear what GOD says instead of what others and what the “me” inside me says or thinks.
The “inside chatter” in my brain can keep me from doing things that I thought I might not be capable of doing. When this happens, I read scripture and fill my head with positive thoughts of God’s love and faith. I am loved and capable of mighty things by God’s grace.
I am just learning to identify the chatter. I have just went along with it for so long. Now I am stepping back and recognizing it for what it is. Chatter. Not fact. It has kept me from finishing so many things I’ve started and from reaching goals I’ve set. There are so many times when all I can do is say “Jesus, Jesus, Jesus” to make it go away. (Thanks Lysa for that advice!) It is a constant battle but I am finding it to be very rewarding when I prove that chatter wrong!
What I’ve learned about negative chatter is that it’s real and I need to pay more attention to it. I’m not good at looking back at my life and defining moments like u did, or realizing lessons learned, or at seeing a pattern in my life. But one emotional but very real night, I remember sobbing to my husband about about a bunch of different circumstances in my life and at the end of each one I sobbed “and it just screams to me, Carrie you’ll never be good enough”!! I heard those words in my head over send over again, but in my head- not audibly- ever- in my life. No one ever SAID that to me! But feeling that way about myself really effects how I live my life! And so now I always have to remember that for Jesus I am good enough and that’s why he died for me! Thank you for the insight! 😉
I’ve learned that maintaining positive inside chatter is essential to my focusing on God.When I allow negative inside chatter to dominate I’m focused on me or other things, not on the amazing love that God has to offer me.
Do I still struggle with negative inside chatter – yes, but…I try to surround myself with positive reminders that can help to redirect my focus to the one who can do all things!
Since I was a child the inside chatter has been chatting away and has hindered me from doing things for me. Just like right now…I can’t post this comment. Its telling me it failed and im thinking what did I do wrong. 🙂
My preacher spoke on this very topic yesterday!!!! When my inner voice is screaming ugliness, my heart is whispering that God loves me & that is what I try to listen to. It is so hard though!!!
I have been battling negative “inside chatter” for as long as I can remember. Of course, at least now I am aware that’s it happening. I had a good friend of mine offer me the scripture “the tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” ~ Proverbs 18:21. At first I was infuriated at what she was saying about me. Although, I was talking negative about everything and it was poisoning my life. It took me a long time to see that she was right. I was bringing a lot of things into my life by speaking them. But, that’s exactly what was coming from my heart and mind. I’ve traveled around the mountain many, many times before I realized that my mind was polluted with gunk. I think being aware is the key – you can’t address what you won’t acknowledge. I still struggle with it, but I’ve decided if a negative thought creeps in, I immediately replace it with a positive one.
Inside chatter is the worst because you do it to yourself. Saran knows your insecurities and plays on that. I always say anything you try to think through or work through in the middle of the night is never good. That is my worst time for inside chatter and I try to tackle it with prayer.
My inside chatter is almost always negative. I am still learning to ignore it. There are days that it gets the best of me. I pray that as I grow and learn in my faith that my inside chatter will also grow and learn with me. God has the power to do and all things. This I must keep on believeing!
I already knew that my inside chatter was negative, and that it is causing me to lose these years that God has given me. I also know that whenever you take something away, you have to fill the void with something else, so I’m trying to learn to leave positive, God-filled messages to myself instead.
I know that my “inside chatter” is nothing but negativity. If I entertain the “inside chatter” for too long, it makes me down and depressed. I have to choose to head it off at the first onset with what the Word of God says about me. Praise and worship is one of those weapsons I use to quiet my spirit, soul, and body to hear my loving Father’s voice and the song He sings over me. Then I am empowered once again to stand up to the devil who is behind the negative inside chatter and say, “I choose to not listen to you. My loving Father says differently and then begin to quote the scriptures.
I have realized that the inside chatter is unkind and harsher than anyone on the “outside” could ever be.
It’s very easy to listen to the inside chatter. Just about as easy as breathing some days. It’s remembering that the inside chatter isn’t truth. We are wonderfully made in the image of Christ and it’s those truths and freedoms from Christ that need to be our focus. Choosing to give them over to God and live in His freedom is a regular prayer. Thank you for sharing this thought today.
Inside negative chatter has always been, and will probably always be, a struggle for me. The enemy whispers into my hear that I am not good enough, or nice enough, or smart enough, tell me I never do anything right, am not a good, wife, mother, daughter. In my week moments, I retreat tearfully and huddle int he corner believing everything he whispers to me. But sometimes I find strength, more often now than I used to, to tell the enemy to step off. GOD LOVES ME! GOD think I am perfect just the way I am. And who am I to second guess what GOD knows to be true about me!
I am so thankful for “Unglued,” Lysa, it has helped me immensely, and I am very much looking forward to your webcast tomorrow. God bless you.
That inside chatter use to creep up on me until 2009 when I got it, Jesus loves me and I am beautiful and he gives me strength to move forward. Does not matter what others think of me, just need to please him and him only.
As girls and women, I don’t think the inside chatter ever goes away. We read into everything; every tone of voice, every look, every “non-invite”. Not only do we read into it, but we replay it over and over like an unending record which only makes us feel worse! When this happens, I tell myself “Stop! What does God think of me?” I just think on who I am in him and does this “really” matter in the grand scheme of life?” it is tough to put those negative thoughts aside but when we can overcome negativity with truth, we win every time!
I am the one that is always worried about if I left some one out,
I have always struggled with “Inside Chatter”…….. It kept me insecure and isolated socially. You would think that giving my life to Christ at such a yound age of 8 that I would have come through quickly. However, that was not the case. I now at the age of 42 have come to relize that my mother struggled with it all her life and my daugther is struggleing with it. I so want to be free from this and I want to be able to help my daughter. I believe that the bible teaches us to anchor our lives with the truth of God, not what the world or satan is trying to get us to believe. God gave me this word……… When we “abide” in the truth, we will “withstand” the deceptive plans coming against us! By doing so we will NOT……. bow (to), give in (to), knuckle under (to), stoop (to), submit (to), succumb (to), surrender (to), and yield (to) destruction and desolation! God bless you and your service to the Lord 🙂
A lot of the time I feel like I’m a little to comfortable with negative inside chatter. It’s very common. I notice my children deal with it also. I’m so ready to move past it and know who I am and where I stand in Christ! I can’t wait to hear the webcast!
Thank you for posting about the negative inside chatter that so many of us struggle with. Even in my forties I still struggle with being a people pleaser and wanting to be accepted an included. I felt very alone for many years and longed for close friendships. It wasnt until I prayed to the Lord about it that I found healing and acceptance with wonderful godly friends. Only God can heal the negative chatter that goes on in my head. He alone is faithful!
I believe satan uses inside chatter to hurt us as well as those around us. Got to keep praying constantly for God to drown it out!!! 🙂
My heart broke into a thousand pieces while reading this. I have felt the pain and still have moments of not feeling included or part of a group, a family, a team, a friendship. And now I’m watching my daughters go through the same pain. What I try to remind myself is to put God in that place of emptiness and ask HIM to fill it with HIS love. Thank you so much for sharing this post, it couldn’t have come at a better time!
All the way from Baltimore! Inside Chatter- I think listening to inside chatter as been a HUGE battle for me. Some areas in life it is easy to tune out and other areas it is not. This blog has helped me actually- I made Lysa’s comment my FB status as I read today- Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.
Honestly, I have learned that you have to combat inside chatter. Sometimes you have to talk back! Sometimes you have occupy your attention with something else!
I just started reading your blogs as I have a goal to feed myself more this year by reading! I want to be a writer and believe the gift is in me. So I said if I want to write- I must read! So Lysa’s writings are how I am combating and conquering inside chatter. Ironically, it will help me not only grow beyond my issues with inside chatter; it will help me help others
So I can use those books to read so I can keep up my goal!!!! 😉
Oh, that inside chatter has haunted me since I was a pre-teen! I still remember hearing, if your not friends with them your not good enough. Wow, I struggled with this until about 3 years ago, when I met some of the Best, God loving Woman at my new job and that is when I began my new journey, developing my relationship with Christ. My journey has been tough, but I have, for the first time in my life, Honest, Loyal, Loving, Christian Friends and A Loving, Christian Husband. Making Christ the Center of your life brings the WHOLE WORLD to a new light. Sometimes, I do not like what it shows me, because it reminds me of how close minded, selfish and unloving I was. But, I have absolutley learned that I am a child of God and how he sees me is the number one concern in my life now. I have become a respectful wife to my husband, a loving parent to my children, a joyful daughter to my parents, an understanding sister and a loyal friend to my friendships. Christ quiets those voices, so I can hear Him! I am so thankful that when God opened my heart to Him, I accepted His call!
I wish we could go back and talk to our insecure teen self! Better still I wish we could convince our own teens that they are fearfully and wonderfully made and that they could see themselves through HIs eyes:)
I have learned alot from Renee Swope’s A Confident Heart, about combating negative thoughts with what God says in His Word. This has been a wonderful tool for me to be prepared as well as building up my heart after a confidence knock down. I do try to keep a prerecorded tape in my mind filled with the Lord’s promises and positive messages to play on a moments notice to remind my heart what Christ really thinks of me. Looking forward to the webcast. Thank you for doing it.
Chris Tennison
The inside chatter can really set the tone of my day(or evening).. I have learned that it can effect how I communicate with others as well. I have learned to say out loud “get away from me Satan!” He looks to steal our joy, this will make us null and void in the call for Christ. I don’t always get it right, but I am making imperfect progress daily!
Constant struggle for me, but I’ve learned that you have to talk back to inside chatter, not with your own words, but with the powerful words and promises of God!
Thank you for sharing this with us, some days I need to block out all the chatter, I have been taking care of sick family members mom & dad both have cancer and sometimes the chatter tells me I am not good enough and to fight to keep it behind me.
Thank you for posting about the negative inside chatter that so many of us struggle with. Even in my forties I still struggle with being a people pleaser and wanting to be accepted an included. I felt very alone for many years and longed for close friendships. It wasnt until I prayed to the Lord about it that I found healing and acceptance with wonderful godly friends.
I wish we could go back and talk to our insecure teen self! Better still I wish we could convince our own teens that they are fearfully and wonderfully made and that they could see themselves through HIs eyes
As simple as it sounds, I remind myself that my negative chatter is filled with untruths and reminding myself that The Lord loves me regardless of my imperfections. It is difficult but I remind myself of this and with lots of repentance and prayer, especially trying to be perfect (perfect mom, perfect wife, perfect daughter-in-law, etc.) Also I notice when the negative chatter seems to strike hardest is when I am very tired and weary. So I stop, think and then try to take a much needed nap. As a mom of two, naps are hard to come by.
My inside chatter assumes a lot and is harder on me than the situation often calls for.
I have learned (or at least trying to learn) not to listen to most of my inside chatter. I find that a lot of mine is negative and puts me in a depressed mood. I am trying to focus on the postive rathr then the negative.
Wow inside chatter! How devistating it is to us women as we define ourselves by what we think others are thinking. Some bottle it up, others cry with emotion at every thought, and still others build thick walls acting as if nothing can hurt them all the while aching inside. This daily struggle is hard enough for us to bear but lately I have had to watch my preteen fall into the same ugly patterns. My tears now flow even heavier because I see and fear the hurt that will also plague her life. And for a mama that pain is unbarable! Can’t wait to hear some encouragement on this topic!
that the inside chatter can destroy my relationships and my life. if i listen to it.
I wish we could go back and talk to our insecure teen self and that we could convince our own teens that they are fearfully and wonderfully made so they could see themselves through HIs eyes
Great article!
Wether I feel like it or not, I have fullness in CHRIST. I might not be important enough for other people, but I am precious in His sight. He is enough.
How funny that is the topic for today. My daughter has been battling this for over 2 weeks. Her BFF decided that she wanted to be cruel and start telling personal and private things about her and now has invited others to do things and left my daughter out. I told her that there are part-time people and life-time people and this girl was just possibly a part-time person. Inside shatter is a constant and all you can do is keep praying. I say Jesus, Jesus, Jesus over and over and pray for the thoughts and feelings to go away. Growing up and being told negative things daily is hard but the good new is that Jesus came to take all those negative feelings away and save our souls. We are victors and not victims!!
I am constantly battling my inside chatter. I constantly doubt myself and I do my best to not worry about what others think of me. I thought I left all of those insecurities in my teen years, but realize that people have their “clicks” as adults, too. I do try to remind myself that I am loved and that I am of worth to my husband and my children, and most of all by my Heavenly Father.
taking every thought captive for Christ is a LOT easier said than done. I so often find myself listening to the negative and allowing it to define me rather than focusing on the words of Jesus and allowing myself to see how HE sees me as my true image.
My chatter is …..Im never good enough….but through God I know I am! I am learing to be still and know HIM! Reading praying and CHANGING everyday <3
I am constantly trying to remember that the sooner I try and stop my negative thoughts the sooner they stop spiraling out of control and ruining my mood for the day
I have a really hard time with inside chatter. I have a tendency to dwell on things and also to have low self-esteem. Because of these things, I have to really force myself out of the negative thoughts when they hit me. I also have to work at this and I’m looking forward to the webcast!
Oh, that dreaded “inside chatter”….. What is it about us that makes us so prone to listening to the lies?? Satan would like nothing better than for that chatter to become our way of life, the integral pattern of our days. One of the truths that I have found in dealing with this is that the more we are focused on the world, the more we listen to the chatter. The voice that tells us we aren’t enough, aren’t good enough, can’t do anything right seems to scream the loudest when we are concentrating on the here and now. When we are able to shift our focus to eternity, to Christ, it seems that chatter disappears or at least the raging beast is tamed into a quiet whimper. The difficulty lies in remembering this…… And not believing those lies that are whispered to us.
I have heard this “inside chatter” my whole life. I have often felt like the champion of the underdog….that the only people that liked me were the ones that others didn’t like either which was ok. But there are those times when you wonder…what’s so wrong with me??? What’s so ugly about me that you can’t like?? Why do you have to make me feel second best?? Well, Lysa, you put it quite well….to GOD we are NEVER second best and we will never be. I HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST!!!
I really, really try not to listen to “Inside Chatter”. Really! I try to listen to “God’s chatter” but sometimes it’s hard to hear Him, especially when the “Bethany’s” are other church women. But I realize that I need to worry about myself and how I treat others and God will be the judge of others actions, whether they were meant to be hurtful or they just plain forgot. And I have to be OK with that, because I know that I am loved by my Father and the rest is just life here on Earth.
I have learned over the years to let God’s Word define whether I have the right to get upset. Usually, I find that I get in my own way of forgiveness and letting go of the chatter that goes on in my mind. Some days I give God the reigns and trust Him to be my everything. However, there are days when I choose to listen to myself and rationalize my emotions. Those days don’t end well. Ahhhh, but I’m not who I used to be and for that I give Him all thanks and glory! Amen!
Inside chatter is difficult but I try combat it with scripture and prayer.
2 Corinthians 10:5 NIV
We should think about what we are thinking about and if it does not align with the wors of God it needs to go! The enemy will inject darts of poisonous thoughts and if we do not know the word we will accept it as our own truth and then a stronghold is put into place!
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
I just finished reading Unglued and am still taking baby steps to help with my inside chatter every day. Some are better than others but I am making imperfect progress and I can rejoice in that. So excited about your podcast tomorrow night. I plan on listening.
This is such a hard lesson to learn, especially when you are new to an area. I love knowing that He selected me and the rest is irrelevant in the big picture. Thank you for the reminder – it was needed, again.
Ahh yes, that negative inside chatterbug seems to knock on the doors of so many. It tries to befriend even the strongest of women. It comes disguised as one of our “best intentions” towards becoming a better mother, wife, daughter, friend or better than Mrs. Jones next door etc when it’s truly just a huge cloud of toxic condemnation courtesy of the enemy! I’ve dealt with this negative chatter since I was a child – most of that time was spent trying to break MYSELF free from it (I was a huge psychology fan!) Even though I was raised in a Christian home, it was only in the past several years that I truly realized the sheer power in “giving it to God.” That is, handing over every negative thought or ideation, realizing that He WANTS us to turn over our burdens and rest in His powerful peace. I won’t say I don’t struggle anymore- that would be a lie. My current energy is poured into helping my teenaged daughter overcome the same negative inner chatter and help her to open up her eyes (sooner than I did) to the awesome and restorative PEACE that comes only from our mighty God!
There are always 2 voices within me competing for my attention – the voice of God and all that is True versus the voice of this world and all it’s insecurities and lies. Each day I have a choice which voice I am going to listen to. The voice that grows and gets louder is the voice I feed. It’s a daily struggle and a daily choice!
Psalms 42 and 43 are good examples of the chatter that was going on in David’s head as he was driven from Jerusalem in exile by Absalom’s rebellion. (His own son!) This exile barred him from public worship and he was in deep grief as he was separated from worshiping God together with his people. David experienced negative chatter too!
The core of negative chatter is “fear”. As a teenager, I had such fear of being rejected by my peers and as an aging adult, with grown children and now grandchildren, I’m sorry to say that fear still rears it’s ugly head at me:
“You’re family doesn’t need you anymore…”
“You’re not pretty anymore…look at that gray hair and those crows feet!”
“No one is going to want to take care of you when you can’t take care of yourself…”
What stirs me about Psalm 42 and 43 is that David didn’t stay in that sewer of negativity.
He states in 42:5, “Why so downcast, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me?”
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation.”
He encouraged himself by remembering the character of God and choosing to hope in God.
I want to be like David and turn my thoughts from the marsh of despair to the Living Water of Hope!
I’m a senior citizen and that inside chatter still lives inside of me and still thriving quite well. I watched in envy a few years ago as several of the ladies from my church would meet at my neighbor’s house across the street every Thursday night for Bible study. I was even told one day in church from this neighbor who started the bible study that she planned to invite me as soon as the fall season started up again. I never received that invite. I was hurt to the core, still am, even though that group doesn’t meet anymore. So my inner self still says, ha ha you still aren’t good enough, they didn’t want you, your so stupid, you’ll always be on the outside looking in. Get a life!
The inside chatter means harm for me if I don’t replace its words with the Word of God.
Inside Chatter has always been something that tries to make my path crooked. In those times I have to remember what the bible says about the real me. I am redeemed, loved, worthy, beautiful, a child of God, a new creation, I could go on and on…. My old self has died with Christ and I am resurrected with Him as a new body. My past does not define me, I don’t live there anymore.
Over the years I’ve gotten better about negative chatter stemming from interactions from peers. Ironically, it’s family and my husband I allow to inspire such thoughts. just have tobkeep focusing on Christ and what He would have today to me.
The “inside chatter” is something i constantly struggle with! I am always so concerned about what people think of me and being accepted. I dont know that it is something you ever outgrow.
I’m not good at looking back at my life and defining moments like u did, or realizing lessons learned, or at seeing a pattern in my life. But one emotional but very real night, I remember sobbing to my husband about about a bunch of different circumstances in my life and at the end of each one I sobbed “and it just screams to me, Carrie you’ll never be good enough”!! I heard those words in my head over send over again, but in my head- not audibly- ever- in my life. No one ever SAID that to me! But feeling that way about myself really effects how I live my life! And so now I always have to remember that for Jesus I am good enough and that’s why he died for me! Thank you for the insight! 😉
I struggle with “inside chatter” quite a bit. Unfortunately, I feel I have this problem at work. There are 3 in my grade level and as the saying goes “three is a crowd”. I frequently feel as if I am being left outf what the other two are doing.
I pray continuously for help through this.
“Inside chatter” is definitely something I have dealt with over the years (along with the other 98% of people). It’s unfortunate how many of us have allowed these thoughts to control our actions, and dictate our days. It sometimes seems impossible to combat them, however I know through Christ all things are possible! I also have found it helpful to have a dear friend that I can share my “inside chatter” with. Because once it is out in the open, it doesn’t seem so uncontrollable. Plus friends can remind us of the Truth that is found in the Word. And 100% of the time the Truth will disprove our “inside chatter.” Thanks for sharing your heart with us. Blessings!
I have learned that inside chatter is Satan trying to get the best of you and you have to.change your way of thinking sometimes and remember that no matter what God loves you!!! And that is what really matte
rs. Amen.
As an adult I often feel excluded from groups. I know many moms who are in multiple play groups, and they talk about all the fun things they do, but I have never been invited to join. Also when at the park with my kids alone and there are several moms talking and no thinks to even introduce themselves to me. It is hard to be the new mom in a small town. hopefully I can find the confidence to walk up and say, ” My name is Sarah, your children are beautiful! May we play with you today?”
You should definitely introduce yourself! I think people just get comfortable in their group and don’t even think to talk to others.
I still deal with inside chatter at work. I work in a very small office and my coworker and boss (the only other ladies in our office) are much more suited to each other than I am to them. I’m the only one with a family so I’m not able to hang out with them as they hang out with each other. They go paddle boarding, on wine cruises, and just hang out with each other and their significant others.
If they are ever talking in the office I would assume they were talking about me. I could picture it in my head the conversation they were having about me. That I wasn’t a good employee or that I was different from them. I could hear them judging me. It made my days really long and hard. I had to pray about it and soon I didn’t think those things anymore for a while. Then one day I had a conversation with my boss and she just seems upset and I could hear the chatter again. “She’s mad at you, you aren’t trying hard enough, you are doing your best”. I talked to my husband that night and he reminded me that I have no idea what is going on with her. She could just be having a bad day. He made me feel a lot better… and the next day I found out she had a really bad headache that afternoon.
I sometimes amaze myself how often I compare me to other women,other wives and other mothers. It is so easy to look at those other people who seem to have it all together and wonder what have I done or what am I doing wrong in my life. I am very thankful to find truths in God’s word that help to ease the “negative talk” in my head. I also have to tell myself that no ones lives are perfect and I have a lot to be thankful for. I sometimes wonder where I could be if I had searched for God’s will my whole life. I love the fact that the Lord meets us right where we are.
The inside chatter happens when you are alone. My mind says no one calls you, no one likes you, who are your friends. Questions…you can start to agree with. But….I have found that when I change this broadcast to God and Thank him for the things I do have and the life I do have. It quickly leaves. Yes… I now know hormones play a big part in it and now I can be prepared for those days.
We can’ do it all.
We can’t be it all.
Yet, some days I expect myself to – and that’s the standard used by that voice in my head.
I try to remember that we each have priorities.
And, I repeat to myself, “She has different priorities.”
(Whoever I’m comparing myself to – literally or in my head.)
Sometimes when I use that explanation it comes out WAYYYYY judgmental.
Sometimes it’s a quiet acknowledgement that she has made difference choices – perhaps not the ones I would choose…and that’s OK.
We can’t do it all.
Only one could…and HE gave us grace.
Sometimes we need to offer it to ourselves 🙂
The inside chatter used to be a lot worse/get to me a lot more when I was younger. As I’ve gotten older I am not as insecure as I once was. But when it is starting to nag at me, I pray and turn on some worship music to remind me of WHOSE I am!
Praise God for good fellowship. Thanks to Lysa for opening the door and all those who open their hearts and share. Nice to know there are so many with the same struggles. I often use Psalm 19:14 as my sword to fight these thoughts:
“May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.”
May this be your prayer too, fellow soldiers. And I am anxious to learn more from you Lysa. Thanks for all your encouragement and honesty. You are such a blessing.
Some days I wish I wouldn’t give in or listen to the inside chatter…
The inside chatter is a daily battle for me. The two most important things that I’ve learned is that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am God’s princess and he made me just how he wants me. The second thing is that I am full in Christ. When I focus on these things that negative chatter is not there. I can’t let Satan win!
What I have learned about “inside chatter”, is that mine seems to really love talking me out of the good things in my life and leaving me alone, afraid, bitter, envious, and angry. I don’t understand why it’s always so negative and mean. However, I do know that with God stregnthening me, I CAN overcome it! That voice has cost me so much in my life, unspeakable joys. Thankfully, there’s another voice to hear if I stuff a rag into the first ones mouth, I can hear a still small voice that tells me: I made you. You are mine and you were worth not only dying for but unbelievable torture.
How can I allow me to believe myself and all my insecurities that scream at me everyday, when I sit on just that little bit of severe truth??! 🙂 I hate that voice that speaks so negatively to me and being a visual person, it helps me to visualize stuffing a rag inti her mouth and locking her away, then turning and starting up a conversation with the girl still standing there who has put on peace, tranquility, acceptance, love, lovingkindness, temperance, courage, bravery, joy ,purity of thought. She’s so much nicer to talk to!! Enjoy you day ladies!! Lisa thankyou so much for yiur ministry and your books! You really speak to my heart. I love your honesty!! <3
Daily Struggle! Pray that the Holy Spirit will step in and help me rebuke the flesh or the ‘ole devil!!
This is a constant struggle for me and has been all of my life. I remember all the hurtful words and situations as if they were yesterday, mostly words my mother said to me that weren’t very kind. It has truly crippled me, and greatly affected my life, that I can’t get past it. Praise God that I am in therapy now, and in a Christian support group through my church, and in daily conversation with God about it all. The Lord is helping me day by day to get past it all and be forgiving and whole, and to love myself and see myself as God does. Praise Him!!!
Iv’e learned that “inside chatter” is lies told to me by the devil and can cause inner torment and we imagine things that either aren’t true or will probably never happen. I struggle with this daily and have also learned to take it to the cross daily first thing in the morning so as not to have to spend my day defating it! Thanks as always for your insight Lysa! Xxo
My inside chatter is usually present when I am working. As a Makeup Artist, I am very aware that my outward appearance is very important; women expect me to look very “put together”. It is easy to start to feel insecure in myself when feeling so much pressure. Until I realize that the pressure comes from ME. I know that I am worthy of respect from customers and coworkers alike; the best I can be is what God wants from me – no more, no less. When I let go of that negative chatter, my whole day changes. Sales go up; I really focus on the customer, and we all leave feeling better about ourselves 🙂
I try to remember that that negative “inside chatter” would never come from our loving God. He loves us all the time, and we should try to see ourselves from His perspective.
Inside chatter can be deceiving. There will be times when u feel like its the truth, but that’s when it’s important to remember that we were made for more.
I am trying to get rid of that inside chatter and to listen solely for the voice of God.
What gets me the most… is that just yesterday I had these same thoughts and feelings but they were for my 10 yr old daughter!!! Why didn’t she get invited, is she not liked and why did I hate it so bad for her…bc I fight these thoughts so often @ 34.. I don’t want to see it happen to her too!! It can be paralyzing at times…
Inside chatter is defining me at this point in my life, I am sleepless most night because I can’t shut it off. Looking forward to the webcast tomorrow.
Focus is what I keep telling myself- focus on the fullness of Christ and ask him to help me make the comments I hear Satan making go silent instead of high volumne
I live with this “chatter” every. single. day. Sometimes, I feel strong enough to tell it to hush up. But other days, I feel like I’m whittled down to just a teeny, bawling piece of myself by day’s end. On those days, I feel like a failure for many reasons, but ALSO because I wasn’t strong enough or smart enough to resist the chiding chatter.
I am really looking forward to the webcast tomorrow! I want to not put the whole of my identity into the smallness of a situation. Remembering I have been given fullness in Christ! Inside chatter in is a daily battle for me but praise to God – I have my mind fixed on the promises given to me as a daughter of the King despite my shifting emotions.
The “inside chatter” is the devil trying to tear us down! We need to keep our eyes and hearts focused on God and he will take care of us. We need to read God’s Word for the true and positive encouragement and for our daily bread. There are days when I don’t get to read God’s Word and pray in the morning before the kids get up and let me tell you by mid-morning I am realizing why the day is going so horribly! God is so awesome and it encourages to know that he is always with me and that he is going to take care of me and that he loves me for who I am. I am so thankful for a forgiving God. Stay focused on Him!
Aim plagued by negative self talk. I have learned, though, that focusing on Who Christ says I am helps me.
I had the same problem as a kid & still do as an adult. People truly are fickle! But I’m so blessed that God is never fickle with me. He loves me & accepts me no matter what. I just always have to remember that.
I struggle with the “inside chatter” a lot. I often over think the small situations and let it get me down. I have been trying super hard to not sweat the small stuff, but it is hard. I have been lifting it up in prayer and it has helped. Thanks for posting this!
I have found such joy in reading and studying thru Lysa’s lessons and daily posts. It has been and will continue to be tough, honest, and soul-searching, but sooooo worth the journey!
These thoughts you have shared on inside chatter have been a God sent revelation to me. Inside chatter makes us forget how precious and loved we are by God and Satan uses this chatter to separate us from God and question His love for us. We all have pink shirt party stories that we have let define us for too long! You are right, It is time to see them for what they are, situations that might have been disappointing at the time do not define the loved child of God that I am! Looking so forward to tomorrow night!
What does “your comment is awaiting moderation mean”?
I use a simple trick. I shake my head the way I would if I have water in my ear to dislodge the water & shake the chatter out of my mind.
I have some negative self chatter related to some of my husband’s family members, and I am trying to figure out what good boundaries within a family look like so that I can respond with love and respect towards them and myself. Your posts have been encouraging, and I am looking forward to the simulcast!
I did not always recognize what that “inside chatter” was all about and, I must admit, it ruled me most of my pre “child of Christ” days. More times than not, I recognize it now and ask the Lord to transform my thoughts, renew my thinking. This is a “one thought at a time process” that has become a part of my life! (Romans 12:2 …. be transformed by the renewing of your mind)…
This resonates with me, as did Sheila when she spoke at Johnson Ferry Baptist Church’s women’s retreat a year ago. Realizing we are all walking in brokenness to some extent and that God made us relational beings is huge in overcoming rejection. While He is our “all in all,” He wants fellowship with us and has created us to desire and need fellowship with others. If I remain alone in rejection, even with The Lord, it can linger at times; that’s when I know I need to reach out to a close friend or two. Thank you for your ministries, Lysa and Sheila!
I learned after getting divorced 2 years ago that most of the “chatter” I hear isn’t even in my voice. It’s of my ex and his family and their thoughts of me. I have learned through reading scripture, attending church and beginning to see me as He sees me that all that “chatter” doesn’t mean anything. Those are thoughts and opinions of people that don’t know the real me, the renewed me; the me I am now because of Him and my renewed faith. When I feel all those negative thoughts and memories coming back up I listen to a favorite worship song “You are More” by Tenth Avenue North. I am more than all my experiences, my failures, the opinions of others, the “chatter” in my head. I am a beautiful, amazing, wonderful child of a beautiful, amazing wonderful Heavenly Father. I am a child of God and I am worthly (even if the “chatter” tells me otherwise).
If my comment won’t post, is that negative chatter??
The negative voices I hear come from the enemy I just have to remain in Gods word and I will not let these negative thoughts overcome me. Sometimes it becomes an everyday struggle but my God is bigger and I just have to let Him take control.
I’ve learned that negative chatter can consume me and really mess up my day/week/life. I try to remind myself constantly about how important it is to take these thoughts captive and thunk about whats excellent and praiseworthy. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. It’s like you have this earthly mom (or dad) in your head that just keeps telling you how you could have down something “better” (and what a disappointment you are when you don’t “Succeed”). Except you are the mom talking to yourself!
This is such a wonderfully written blog about a person’s self worth. I am an older woman. During my lifetime I have listened to my friends speak to incidents such as the one you spoke to or conversations with an insensitive parent or important person. Negative incidents or comments have such damaging and lasting effects. A close relative told me that I didn’t have good looks like my sister so I had better work on my personality. What was this person thinking?! I am a parent of grown children and I would never say such a thing to a child. But as I grew and matured I grew in wisdom and insight. About age 14, I had an epiphany one day. I could choose to think about positive things in myself and in others and refuse to think on the negative. I was a choice I made. Praise the Lord! Zig Zigler says to be a gold digger; dig past the dirt for the gold that is in every one of us. Thank you for your consistently grand postings and writings that speak to the very sensitive heart in each of us that long for healing and health and happiness.
I thought the “inside chatter” would have stopped by this time of my journey. It is a struggle. I find myself amazed at how easy it is to counsel other women that their identity is in Christ alone, only to not always apply it to my own life.
This struggle just screams that I don’t trust Jesus…..it takes a daily (or by moment:) relinquishment of these thoughts. Yay..Jesus!!
I have learned that my inside chatter is never anything I would say to someone else, so why do I say it to myself. I am too hard on myself.
For me, inside chatter (what I like to call “static”) is the paralyzing opposition that attacks me in the midst of experiencing clear direction from God. The static used to be so loud and my brain was so jumbled that I was basically immobilized – virtually useless to carry out any of the plans God has for me. With the help of the Holy Spirit, precious moments of clarity are more frequent. I am learning to cut through the noise and listen for His still, soft voice leading me forward. The static is my brain’s default mode so tuning it off is a daily battle. I am thankful that I do not have to fight it alone.
I know that the negative chatter inside your head can be very defeating. I have learned that by reading the Bible every day helps – gives my mind something else to focus on. It’s amazing the difference in me if I don’t take the time to read it!
I’ve dealt with “inside chatter” most of my life. It’s been a huge factor…or maybe a result of…my anxiety. I’ve been very much a people pleaser and have felt that I must make others happy in order to show them love. As I’m growing older…and wiser in Christ, I realize this is much less of a reality. I have been more mindful of putting Christ first, not what I think others think. I’ve let that inside chatter dictate my choices and direction. The only thing I should listen to is the voice of Christ. And also knowing that I am made exactly the way I was intended to be…so I shouldn’t doubt the “perfection” of Christs creation. 🙂
Thanks for this post! I needed this reminder. 🙂
I have been dealing with negative chatter since I was a teenager. I have realized that most if the conversations with myself are over small things. Now that I understand this, I can work on ignoring this destructive behavior. Thank you.
My inside chatter sets me up for a bad mood and then not to be very nice to those I love the most! It sets us all up waiting for the volcano to erupt! It also has taught me to take ownership of my feelings and that I choose to let them dictate me, but I’m working on stopping that. Made to Crave and Unglued have been so good for me, my relationship & reliance on God, and my relationship with my family! One imperfect progressive step at a time 😉
I really struggle with this. I have come to realize that this inside chatter does more harm and destruction than any other outside force. Hoping to get some great insight from the webcast.
Can’t wait to hear what you have to say about this!
Inside chatter…the chatter inside your own head can do so much more damage than the outside chatter from others, but it can also help you more than the outside compliments you get from others. I have learned that what I tell myself is who I become. If I tell myself I’m an awful mother than I will give up & not even try to be a good mom, but if I bind & cast out those thoughts & remind myself that they are just lies than I can be better in every area of my life. That is so hard to do sometimes!!
I’ve learned about the insider chatter in my life and this webcast fits just like a glove, so excited to read this book and become a part of this website. Blessing to all!
I just had this conversation this morning with my sixteen year old. I am amazed at how loud those thoughts are and how soft Godly truth thoughts are. The enemy says it louder so you’ll believe it. As I told my daughter the enemy (inside thoughts) is that little thing sitting on your shoulder always having something to say. But we can counter that with the Holy Spirit that’s sitting on the other shoulder speaking truth. We need to pray that God will help us to replace those “inside thoughts” with God’s truth. Everything that God encompasses, possesses, and speaks lives inside of each and everyone of us. Truth is already here. It’s waiting for us to believe what He has already said. Gen 1:27 God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.
Amen to what Tami said thank you Lysa and Proverbs 31 for having this resourse . I find that if I am really tired, I fall into this trap. I look forward to the web cast
You don’t belong, you’re not good enough, you’re not pretty, thin, wealthy enough, these are just a few of the things that spin through my head from time to time. I’m so blessed to know that those thoughts are not from God but lies the Devil uses to hold me back from accomplishing my goals and dreams!
Oh, the dreaded “inside chatter”! It’s horrible the lies Satan tries to convince us are true. I am my worst critic, and the enemy uses that. I need to remember that I am forgiven, I am redeemed by the blood of Jesus…I am a child of God. He doesn’t persecute and talk down to me. It is HIS opinion of me that matters, not anyone else’s! Thank you for the necessary reminder, Lysa! 🙂
I have learned that the negative chatter in my head is hard to get rid of but that the benefits of learning the truth is so freeing that the work to remove the negative is so worth the effort!
Having a young one recently diagnosed with special needs I fight the inside chatter daily. Thank you for this opportunity to get outside of this and learn tools for myself, as well a my kiddos 🙂
I’ve learned to rearrange my thinking and view people through God’s eyes, not mine. I’ve learned to not take everything personal. To realize that’s the way that person is and I can’t change it, but I can change my reaction and thoughts about myself. Thanks for writing such amazing books!!! 🙂
When the inside chatter starts, and it always seems to creep in, I find a quiet place and stop it by saying the opposite of the inside chatter. It was hard in the beginning, but with my self-confidence growing I feel my toolbox for life is working.
I think the one thing that I have learned about inner chatter is the fact that is never really goes away. It is always lurking around waiting for us to leave a door cracked open in which it can once again. We have to spend every day actually every minute using truth to slam those doors and keep the chatter at bay.
I could use some help with inside chatter, I am trying to change negative hateful chit chat to positive things I can work on.
Our inside chatter can be used by God or Satan. We all need to
daily strive to keep our minds focused on truth, and things that
please God. I have a bad habit of belittling myself in my mind. =(
It helps me to have quiet prayer time daily. To read God’s word. To
listen to Christian music, and to quiet the voice in my head when it
is being negative. Remembering who I am in Christ! A daughter of the King!!
Inside chatter… I can’t make it stop some times, the moment I get still – all I hear is the inside chatter of what I didn’t accomplish today, or that I’m not good enough at work, or not a good enough mother, or a good enough wife, or sister, or daughter, or christian. Its a daily struggle and I pray a little harder each day for the strength to not listen to the inside chatter…
Inside chatter is always there – and sometimes if I don’t pay attention to it, I can too easily accept it as being true. I recently found out about Unglued and seriously want to read it!
youtube to mp3
Inside chatter is easier to silence when I’ve had a good night’s sleep. Not that this is the only factor, but it’s certainly one of them! Looking forward to the webcast tomorrow!
My inside chatter comes from being bullied as a kid and it’s hard not to listen to it when it’s so loud and over bearing. I am an overly sensitive person and I take a LOT to heart, especially taking things personally when it may have had little or nothing to do with me. I know I have a really low self esteem now because of all that chatter. I realize that all this negative chatter is coming from satan and am slowly beginning to overcome it, through different Bible studies. I am definitely looking forward to webcast!!!
I constantly struggle with “inside chatter”, always worried about upsetting someone, or what people think of me. It can really ruin an entire day. But by reading God’s Word I am reminded that He loves me for who I am and that’s all that matters!
My buddy and I are working hard to encourage one another and ourselves to being less hard on ourselves!
Over the years I have learned that no matter where you go, or what you do there will be someone that thinks you don’t measure up. Just do your best and be proud knowing that you gave it your all. You are unique in all you do! That is the way God made us!
Wow, I think that “Inside Chatter” is inside every women and it is very hurtful at times but we have got to keep in mind the the devil is a liar!!!! Can’t wait to hear your broadcast tomorrow, I am looking forward to it!
I loved, loved, loved this post! Negative inner chatter has been a HUGE struggle of mine throughout my life. As a Christ follower for these last 13 years, I am STILL absolutely amazed and brought to tears by the promises that I am made complete in Christ!! That I have been given fullness in Christ and have everything necessary for godliness and abundant life. Glory! I’ve loved Lysa’s writing ever since I first read “What Happens When Women Say Yes to God” and would love this Unglued prize package. Thank you so much for the opportunity and for this reminder to find my life source ONLY in Jesus.
Not putting the whole of my identity in one small situation…or one relationship for that matter. Remembering that the fulness of my life is in CHRIST. Why is that so hard to do?
Last summer, I had a fallout with a friend, one of my closest friends. She said some very hurtful things – and never said she was sorry. Although I know I’m not faultless in our relationship, I chose to hold my tongue in that moment and didn’t shout hurtful words. If I could, I would probably just move on (not saying that’s right, but it’s what my flesh wants) – unfortunately, our circles cross in very significant ways and I see her at least 2x/month.
I am always in angst – wondering if I’m supposed to initiate closure to what happened…or just leave things be. The problem is that I don’t feel like I’m being authentic – and that really bugs me. It also causes me (well, the enemy causes me) to doubt many of my friendships. What if other people think about me the words she spoke in anger?
Wow…wasn’t planning on posting all of that – but felt good to get it off my chest. I need to find my security in Christ alone – and combat the negative chatter that keeps me awake many nights. 🙁
It have found for me silencing “inside chatter” is a moment by moment struggle.
I have a difficult time with negative chatter. I have delt with this for so long. It is so hard to turn off. It does help during the day to have worship music on or a sermon playing while I take care of the kids and housework. I have to purposfully tell myself that this negative chatter is from the devil and not from God. If I don’t it becomes a slippery slope. It is a minute by minute thing most days. Praying out loud helps me too.
Oh, the dreaded “inside chatter”! It’s horrible the lies Satan tries to convince us are true. I am my worst critic, and the enemy uses that. I need to remember that I am forgiven, I am redeemed by the blood of Jesus…I am a child of God. He doesn’t persecute and talk down to me. It is HIS opinion of me that matters, not anyone else’s! Thank you for the necessary reminder, Lysa!
im trying to learn to ignore that chatter that satan puts in my head and pay more attention to God.
I struggle with this daily & at 40 it seems so rediculous. Im new to you and this blog. I am trying to learn how to let go and let God, & have faith and know that my happiness shouldn’t come from others. Its hard when you’re reminded daily you’re
not wanted or important
Inside chatter leads to doubt and doubt takes my focus off the promises of God. He is who I need to look to..not me, not anyone else…just HIM!
I am learning that the best way to deal with “negative inside chatter” is to replace it with the truth of God’s Word.
I’ve learned that inside chatter will always be a struggle, but reading the Bible helps.
The mind is something that I need to guard at all times. Negative chatter wants to enter my thinking during the day of how I am not adequate and I remind myself that my God is more than enough, of how I am not able to accomplish my goals and I remind myself of how I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me and what people think of me and I remind myself that if God is for me, who can be against me. To combat this struggle of inner negative thoughts, I strive to surround myself with positive Godly people and tell myself who God says I am with affirmations. I look forward to the webcast and new ideas that I can incorporate to live a joy filled life.
i was one of those girls in high school. I was in the band and most of the time consided uncool. So when all of the popular kids were having pool parties or pizza parties. I was never invited. Kids in high school can be so cruel. But then sometimes I wonder if they really know how bad they are hurting a person.
Through lots of therapy, and the wonderful women I’m meeting through the on-line bible studies and the books that are written by Lysa, Sheila and many, many others, my “inside chatter” finally has another voice that says I’m okay. Do I believe it everyday? Sadly, no. Still have those days. But am I starting to believe it more and more, YES. I’m hearing, believing and having faith in God more and more everyday and His still small voice is getting louder with every step I take. With every moment I spend with God. With every book I read. With every bible study I participate in. My heart is full of gratitude to all those who bear their souls…those moments in their lives where they aren’t so proud of themselves…because so often I can say, “yep, that’s me”. And that helps me to know I’m not alone…I am okay. I am not the things my “inside chatter” would have me believe. Someone lives what I do and “understands”. And that definitely quiets the chatter and helps me remember the good things that I am….
I have had these thoughts run through my head plenty of times. I do struggle daily with this and sometimes it stresses me out. I wish I could just turn those negative thoughts off inside my head. I shouldn’t worry what others think or say about me,I should focus more on God.
I completed Unglued with a group of women a few months ago. I really learned a lot. one of the several things that helped me is learning not being so hard on myself. That it is ok to make imperfect progress. I really enjoyed the steps that help Lysa and try to use them myself when I want to come Unglued.
I’m fighting with inside chatter today. I fight with it almost everyday. Give it up, just to take it back again. I loved what you said about it being a moment. People being fickle. I’m going to remind myself when those 9th grade memories come up and just tell me I’m not good enough or worthy. Those two girls that used to talk about me loud enough for me to hear. I just don’t fit it, I’m not good enough. I wish I could go back and hug that 9th grade me, and let myself know what I read today. But today moving forward, I will remind myself of this truth, and the truth that He works all things according to His purpose. Those moments made me into who I am today, and that is His beloved child, His favored girl, He is head over heals for me, and that is ALL that matters. Thank you for this post! Love you and your ministry. It is helping to bring light to all the dark corners in my life, showing me that Jesus is so real! I can’t wait for tomorrow night!!!!!
Inside Chatter….I have learned so much about it, have helped others through it, and experienced it myself. Being a pastor’s wife, MOPS coordinator, and women’s ministry leader, I have learned that it seems to be a constant battle within ourselves as women in many different aspects of life. I have learned that as long as I am obeying God, it doesn’t matter what others around me do or say. In the end, it’s God that I am answering to, no one else. And praise God that He gives us grace through it all!
I’m still struggling with the inside chatter. Thank you for spending some time guiding us.
Inside chatter is something we all deal with in all we do. It happens at work, home and inside our own head! It is hard to remember how loved we truly are and that all that inside chatter is not important at all! As a woman we tend to repeat all the inside chatter to ourselves daily, we don’t measure up, not pretty enough ,not thin enough and the list goes on and on! I just try to remind my self that I am beautifully and wonderfully made for a purpose that is only important to the ONE that matters!
Really want to read this, and then share with friends!
will there ever be a day that i DON’T hear inside chatter? i have a very supportive family and my husband is my #1 fan – always very complimentary & encouraging. then, why? why the low self-esteem? why do i beat myself up? where do these negative ideas & voices come from? it’s crazy, but these days, i feel it most from the ladies at church! how do i teach my two young daughters to have confidence when i don’t have it myself?
Wow ,where to begin, I definitely struggle with negative inside chatter and constantly seek the Lord’s help and guidance in order to push those thoughts out of my mind. The enemy wants me to think I am not pretty/thin enough (yes at 32 I struggle with this!), not smart enough, not a good enough Christian, and the list goes on. I would love to win this package and embark on a journey of becoming stronger in my faith and realizing just how awesome my God made me:) I have carried the burden of insecurity long enough and now it is time to overcome and break free!
I often have inside chatter worrying what others think about me, especially my mother in law. About other things too. Yesterday I started saying God is good, everyday. Everyday, God is good everytime I start thinking or feeling things I don’t want to. Or when I start to worry.
The last few months have brought insight into my life. I have always been self-conscious and wondered what others thought of me or how they judged me. Being a preacher’s daughter I was judged quite a lot growing up. Recently, however, I made the decision to not let what others “think” about me effect my life in who I am in Christ. I am human. I make mistakes. I will NEVER be perfect, but I can make imperfect progress. I am working at it every day and because of the grace of God I will make it through this earthly life. My goal now is to encourage women and point them to Christ. This may be a friendship or me mentoring another lady or just through prayer, but God will use my life for His glory.
Looking forward to joining the web-cast.
Tara
I seem to constantly battle inside chatter. It doesn’t matter how old I get and much I think I’ve grown in Christ, Satan knows what buttons to push and usually does. I need to learn how to overcome this once & for all. . . or maybe it is a forever battle here on Earth.
I tend to be the same way when I see my friends leaving each other sweet notes and encouraging words on Facebook. I think maybe I’m just not as close to them as I thought. I love how you say it’s just the situation! Just a matter of the Inside Chatter! Thank you!
Chatter fill my head. I work on my chatter and redirect in and make it positive, when the negative chatter enters I try immediately to stop it and redirect my thought I am not always on top of it but I always make a conscious effort to avoid the negative side.
I’m excited about inside chatter!
This is something I struggle with throughout everyday. I totally beat myself up with non-existent “truths” … then I beat myself up for beating myself up. Lysa, we’ve been doing church group studies with your material since last year and honestly, the Lord has blessed you with these insights. You always guide our hearts to Scripture and Truth. I can’t thank you enough for your dedication to your ministry and to Christ especially.
My Truth now: The Lord is my stronghold … I will not give my inside chatter the power, but instead I will pray the Lord fill me with HIS inside chatter reminding me of His promises.
Praying for you and your ministry!
The inside chatter can take control of my life if I don’t stay in tune with what God has to say about me and the plans he has for me. I have really been struggling with anxiety over a few issues in my life and it comes down to fear, I know that God has set my on this path and I need to keep praying for peace in these situations instead of allowing the fear in and causing anxiety. I am not defined but what other think about me!
From the time I was young, I have always dealt with major insecurity issues which leads to A LOT of negative self-talk. Finally in my early 20’s I realized it was the Enemy putting those thoughts into my mind and have tried to make a habit of praying and asking the Lord to get him out of my head. I can’t wait to hear what you ladies have to say about it.
This is a lesson I learn everyday….learning to give it all to God and say you deal with it, and I’ll just try and bask in Your peace that you give me…..as if that isn’t hard enough, trying to help my 16 year old daughter through this stuff is soooo much harder….I want to be that protective mama bear that lunges out at everyone that hurts her….and I have to try and live by example. I don’t know how ANYONE can do this without the Lord on their side. Everyday is a battle of somekind and the only way to survive is to leave it in God’s hands…….Thank you Lysa for being an example to others…especially me.
It wasn’t until the motherhood that I worried about the inside chatter. Now I find I deal with it way to much. Though the Lord has been teaching me who I am in Him there are days I still listen.
“You’re worthless.” “You’re ugly.” “You’re stupid.” These are just some of the lies that run through my head. And for SO long, I thought this was how God was defining me. Silly, I know. But since these thoughts were what I was thinking, I thought it was what God thought about me too. Then, I came across Romans 8:1: “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” I’d read it many times before, but it just clicked. God is not condeming me. All the things I’ve done that have lead me to believer those negative thoughts, God was not condeming me for. I was the only one condeming me. And Satan just loved it. Loved it that I was being so harsh on myself. Made his work much easier. But now, although I still struggly lots, I’m realzing what I think of me is NOT always what Chrst thinks of me.
Wow, negative chatter!! So destructive when we as women belittle ourselves over what we think someone else is thinking about us! Some of us bottle it up, some of us cry at every thought of it, and then there are the ones (like myself) who build a thick skin around our hearts and act as if nothing can penetrate us all the while aching horribly on the inside. Lately I have not only had to fend off my own negative chatter but watch while my preteen daughter begins the destructive patterns of the self inflicted wounds. I have cried harder for her knowing and fearing the pain she too will endure. As a mama this is even more heart breaking! This absurdly leads to more negative chatter for myself lending the viscous cycle more ammunition!! I can’t wait to hear some encouragement on this topic and be reminded of how God sees us through all this!!! Thanks!
The negative chatter from our youth becomes a part of who we are. Good to listen carefully and still hear it then see Gods contradictions of who we really are through Him.
I have finally learned that I am not defined by the world’s definition of beauty. I am not defined by how my husband, friends or family view me. I am defined by how God views me. And to him, I am beautiful. I am fearfully and wonderfully made! It took years of self-loathing and pain for me to come to this understanding. It almost cost my marriage. Now i wouldn’t trade that revelation for the world. I have to find my self-worth in God alone and shut out the negative chatter.
I love what Lynette said. We say so much to ourselves we wouldn’t say to others. Sometimes we need to do to ourselves what we would do to others.
I’ve learned that my inner voice is a liar! There’s only one truth and it’s who the Lord says I am because He canNOT lie. And I am far more harsh on myself and say things I would NEVER say to others! I owe myself the same love and respect I give to others! I remind myself of this when I catch myself lying to myself!
Inside chatter? Hmm … I guess it depends on the day. There are days when the chatter can be positive. But, as we all know, more often than not, it’s usually negative and self-deprecating. My self chatter feeds on all of my insecurities. So, everytime the chatter begins, I know that I need to make a concious effort to stop the negative self talk. I know the enemy uses this to continue to mess with my self esteem issues, but unfortunately, prayer is not always my first response. This is something I need to work on.
After the tramatic events that have taken place in my life lately the inside chatter is at an all time high. I find some days so hard to even get up because it seems like it starts as soon as i open my eyes. I have found that i can make it thru the day just by letting God lead my little steps. If I take the time to talk with my heavenly father before i even let my feet hit the floor then the voice is smaller and almost not there. Thank you for you encouraging words in all the little ways i receive them. your blog and messages thru proverbs 31 have been such a great little light in the crazy that is my life right now.
I am struggling with that very thing this morning! Satan keeps trying to beat me up and some days I let him…. trying not to “give up” and not admit defeat!
I’m very thankful for the timing of this webcast. and I’m thankful for addressing this issue in your book.
I am constantly battling with my inside chatter- which is comparison. It’s always telling me that you are not good enough or you can do better. I am trying to live by a standard or grace instead of perfection . I am struggling daily with this
Choosing to believe God’s truth about me is how I am learning to confront the chatter. I am also trying to search my emotions to find out where those destructive thoughts became a stronghold in my life. Thank you, God, for your grace!
I tend to not dwell on what people say about me. It never really bothers me, but what I say about me damages my spirit. I can be my own worst enemy. I am a work in progress, praise The Lord!
As I ponder 44 years of the “Inside chatter” I find that it has a very similar look..that is of a serpent who is always questioning either God’s goodness, God’s promises or human worth {mine and/or others}…and I know the Word says to “bring every thought into captivity”..amen to that…if it doesn’t line up with God’s Word..it has no place in our minds…the battle is intense at times, but how thankful I am for the LORD..Who He is and for Jesus’ powerful name and the great comfort of the Holy Spirit…I am ever learning to still myself and be aware of where my thoughts are going…I cannot wait to tune in tomorrow night! Blessings to you all!
I learned that I need wise elders around me to help put that inside chatter to be silent.
The negative chatter in my head has caused me so many problems in the past. Whenever I made a mistake, I would berate myself and then feel so incapable that I would quit. It has created fear to express my opionions and thoughts; my creativity; and beliefs because I would attract criticism and the negative thoughts would just take on a life of their own. My Sunday School class of awesome ladies are reading & discussing Unglued. So many of us are emotional women who long to control their emotions rather than have the emotions control us. We long to to have healthy relationships with our families, co-workers, and friends; to resolve disputes or misunderstandings; to grow in our walk with God. Unglued has provided so many insights to me personally that has allowed me to discipline my teenaged sons without drama. I am able to stop and think rationally about the cruel words that have cut me to the quick. And I am empowered to lovingly and cautiously speak my mind when I feel that a situation has become out of control. Thank you Lisa for writing this book. It is and continues to be a great inspiration to me and my friends.
I am struggling with inside chatter the past few weeks but the last few days have been really hard. My church had a leadership conference this past weekend. About half way through Friday night’s service I was in tears, the uncontrollable heavy kind. I had to leave a few minutes early. I’ve realized that I needed to get more plugged in to my church through life groups. So trying to get into the women’s bible study group on Thursdays. My hubby and I have registered to find a life group. We feel a little discourage as this will be our 5th life group in 7 years. Every time we get involved in a life group it break ups.
With all that said I really need help with inside chatter.
Inside chatter is sometimes hard to turn off but I know that is Satan working on me and I am trying to begin praying as soon as it starts and give it to God because He can sure handle it all better than I do!
I think the inside chatter has gotten a lot louder since I’ve had kids.
Thanks to your book, Lysa, “Unglued”, I’ve learned my inside chatter is most often due to expectations I’ve created.
My husband digging through a freshly folded basket of laundry doesn’t mean he doesn’t respect me. That’s all in the expectations I’ve created. God doesn’t want me to hold others to impossible standards
This is something I deal with all the time. When it happens, I have to replace it with the good things He thinks towards me and the reality He makes known through His Word. But it is still so difficult at times.
The inside chatter…sometimes so much louder than even the intentions of those who cause first started our self critisism. For everytime a “Bethany birthday” happened without me there was at least a handful of things that I’d tell myself as to why I was the one home alone. The enemy is fantastic about letting us have a little message to start our minds rolling on their own.. i.e. “What did they mean by that little comment/look?” and that’s all it’d take to get going on my own ideas of why I wasn’t good enough. Thankfully my Redeemer reminds me that I am “fearfully & wonderfully made” & made in His image. Those little moments don’t add up to who I am (if I remember that) they can be a wonderful fuel to draw me even closer to God “who sticks closer than a brother.”
Thanks for your ministry, it’s a blessing!
Great story!
Lysa,
I pray through the chatter; “Father God, please clear my mind of all that is not of You”.
He is so much more capable than I!
Looking forward to the webcast. Thank you for going to the trouble to bring us closer to call. Blessings!
Colleen
That stinkin’ inside chatter-it can bring me to tears or keep me up at night…..if I am honest, it is a daily battle for me and has been since I was a little girl, just didn’t know that is what it was back then! As a grown woman, I still hear it but feel like I am better equipped to deal with it but only because God is my cornerstone, my power! I know that inside chatter is Satan picking away at me and it can be about anything (how I look, relationships, my parenting etc.)! God adores me and is molding me into a woman after HIS heart….that does not make Satan happy, so he tries to get me where it hurts…..messing with my emotions and self worth. But I know when it comes down to it, God has my back (and every other angle)!!! I am his child 🙂
Watching your children go through feelings of insecurity and being left out is even more painful than going through it yourself. Crying out to God for the wisdom to guide my children through these times has helped me to quiet my own inner chatter. Realizing that when we walk with God we are so loved, we are never alone, and that He has a great purpose for us. Everyday I ask my children to go out of their way to show kindness to someone else. We talk about it in the evening. Shifting focus from our hurts to how we can show love to others helps silence those negative thoughts.
Trying to quiet the chatter by combatting it with my memory verses. I think that it is a daily struggle, but I have come a looooong way from where I was. So thankful for the Word of God and His promises for us as His children. Thank you for this giveaway and I’m looking forward to the webcast tomorrow!
I had one of those moments in elementary school when all (seemed like all) the other girls came in wearing their Brownie uniforms with little beanie hat. I wanted to be one of them so bad BUT my mom didn’t drive and they couldn’t afford it SO second best I became a Girl Scout Leader for about 12 years.
I read a quote “Don’t make someone a priority in your life who for them you are only an option.” Though I don’t embrace that advice because I think there are many times we need to make someone a priority no matter how much they discard us, it did get me thinking about how often I feel rejected when I have not received a reciprocated priority status. That rejection can quickly lead to feelings of not being lovable or worth valuing. I put “whole of my identity” (as you so well describe it) in the actions of that one person. So dumb! I am learning to more readily take captive those thoughts that come from the enemy and replace them with the truth that my fullness is in Christ. Thank you for this blog message.
LYSA, WHEN WE DID YOUR UNGLUED BOOK AT GRACE BIBLE STUDY WE DISCUSSED INSIDE CHATTER AND DECIDE TO SAY SATAN GET BEHIND ME, AND USE THE UNGLUED STEP AND SAY JESUS, JESUS, JESUS, AND THINK OF FAVORITE SCRIPTURES, PLUS CALL OR TEXT FRIENDS. WE LOVE YOU AND YOUR BOOKS.
Inner chatter. Ug.
I grew up with “if you can’t say anything good, don’t say anything at all” and drilled into me. So I may not have (always) said them, but I thought them – especially about myself.
Oh I’m my own harshest critic!
May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in your sight, my Lord my strengh and my redeemer!……I may sometimes get the words part correct, but the meditations of my heart part needs assistance. A lot.
I constantly have to replace the inside chatter with what God says about me on a daily basis. I am a people pleaser, so when I feel left out, neglected, shunned, etc. I take it personally and let it affect my emotions. I have to remember what my heavenly Father says about me, not what others do. Difficult at times, but necessary to survive in my daily walk with Him. 🙂
In my journey of many years with our Heavenly Father. It took a huge tragedy to bring me to a place where God told me I had to shed the fear of the judgement of others. That took me to letting go of those I had depended on for support. I was left with the false belief that I had little value by unsposken messages. Then my Father began the journey to give me true confidense in who He created me to be and His destiny for me.
The enemy still rears his ugly head once in a while, but haveing accepted the great love of Jesus Christ for me has set me free, in HIs magnificent grace and love. THANK YOU JESUS.
I often worry what others think about me. Inside chatter is filled with lies that the devil wants us to believe. I have always struggled with fitting in and even now that I am a mom of four beautiful girls I try and hide my struggles with it as I want them to grow up to be confident Godly women.
Yes, fear is something that I have dealt with for a very long time and am still dealing with that and anxiety issues now. I am in the stage of wanting God to help me sort this stuff out and leave it for Him to deal with….which is so hard to do many times.
This is really hard for me. I was verbally abused growing up so I always had that chatter coming from inside and out. I now struggle with trying please so many people to feel good about myself and my worth. I am slowly learning that all I need is my Abba Father. I am made perfect in Him. It is taking time, but I have been feeling some healing.
And I too can relate to your story, I always felt left out and beat myself up over it.
I have learned from personal experience that we are having a conversation with ourselves all day long, since we wake up until we go to sleep we are talking to ourselves and the content of that conversation is what is important. When we allow the Holy Spirit to speak to us by silencing ourselves and listen to his voice, he talks to us with a gentle kind voice and is always about truth, light and love; towards others but most importantly to ourselves, specially as women since we were made to crave his love, so whenever I hear inside chatter judging myself or others I know is the sin in me and not from God. It’s all about stopping and making a decision of who’s i’m going to listen: my stubborn deceiving self or the gentle voice of my God. Love you Lysa, praying for you and the high calling in your life, I hope to meet you one day if not here in heaven.
My inside chatter is an ongoing thing. I think it keeps me up at night. God is bringing through a lot of the inside chatter as of late and it’s been quite a journey. I love seeing myself on the other side of it. Overcoming it with my Father who would love nothing but peace for me.
“You’re worthless.” You’re ugly.” “You’re stupid.” These are just some of the chatter that runs through my head. I used to believe that those lies that I thought about myself, were what God thought of me too. Silly, I know. Thinking that Gos thought those things about me distorted my image of God. I felt condemed. Then I came across Romans 8:1. I had read it many times before, but it really hit home one day: “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” God is not condeming me. Wow! The only person condeming me was me. And the devil loved that to pieces. Now I realize that what I think about me is NOT always what God thinks about me. It helps getting into His Word, and reading for myself who He says I am. Worthless chatter still may run through my brain, but as a recongnize it as a lies and read the Truth, that chatter soon loses its grasp on me.
I am learning that in relationships I carry old baggage, years of build-up, that causes me to react to things in old ways. That I take things in ways they weren’t intended because of past experiences. Does that make sense? How does one stop the cycle or learn to see with new eyes? I’m sure there’s a bit about renewing one’s mind that would prove helpful to changing that inner dialogue. Still seems like such a daunting undertaking….
I am trying so hard to overcome the negative chatter in my head….I am looking forward to the webcast…Thank you for doing all that you do for all of us….Lisa
I have learned that for the most part, my internal chatter lies. It tells me I am not good enough for anything. That I can’t be loved and that life will never get any better. Then there are those God whispers that remind me that He has put me where I am, that He loves me, and that He can always make it better.
Inside chatter from what others say or think about me is one thing. Inside chatter from what I say and think of myself is another. I think we tend to be harder on ourselves than anybody else, making an easy target for the inside chatter to sneak in. But Gods word is truth, and inside chatter is always laced with a lie. and when we let the truth penetrate our lives and really soak it up, that lie begins to unravel at the seems and truth and clarity come bursting in like a flood!
I started reading Unglued just last week and it was so eye opening. I always knew that I had issues with my “chatter” but nothing put it into perspective like reading it in black and white. I work daily to conquer the “chatter” monster with Gods help.
Inner Chatter – Hmmm, never looked at it like that. I have been hearing a lot of it the past few days. As child #3’s arrival gets near I question how life will be when adding another baby boy into the picture. With one that is just under 2 years old and another at age 6 I am a bit overwhelmed with approx. 6 weeks to go until the due date. I have a full time job and I always feel as if I just can’t do it all. There is this inner-chatter that keeps telling me that there has to be a way to be that stay at home mom I want to be, so that I can be there for my boys: for school functions, sports practices, sick days, etc. I feel as if I am missing out and that it will only get “worse” when the next one arrives. Trying to look to Him for guidance – but it is so hard.
I still struggle with “Inside chatter” but I am trying to learn to listen to the “voice of truth” instead.
Inside chatter has been really driving my mind the last two days!! I have witnessed it affect my mood greatly and I really don’t like that. I’m struggling at home and work. I have to continually remind myself to give up these concerns to God and walk away from it. It is SOOOO hard for me especially right now. Looking forward to the webcast tomorrow night!!
Sometimes I feel like negative chatter is God’s way of turning us towards Him. When things are going overly good I tend to be more worldly, when I am humbled a bit whose the first one I turn to? Yep, I run like a baby to my Father 🙂 I struggle daily with negative thoughts but I try really hard to remember that it’s the devil creating that doubt and I say “I know how this story ends, and I will attend the the biggest and best party ever!” Stay strong my sisters and brothers in Christ and and may our Father’s love comfort you in times of negative chatter!
I really have to fight envy and bitterness. So much of these two weaknesses are a result of negative chatter. I don’t know why I care so much about what I think everyone thinks about me. There is a quote that sums up this crazy way we judge ourselves. “I am not what I think I am, I am not what you think I am, I am what I think you think I am” -Charles Horton Cooley Think about it. We put so much on this inner negative chatter and it is built on complete assumption. I personally let it get the best of me on a daily basis. It’s such an uglyness and I believe God is working with me to see the beauty that He sees.
The inside chatter is one thing i have deal with all my life. But since I’ve got saved God has bought my grace and peace over the chatter. Praise God for loving me.
My inside chatter has gotten so much better since I got away from some people in my life that should’t have been in my life!! So glad God is good all the time!!
How easy it is to succumb to lack of inclusion and be left in a sea of self-doubt and unworthiness. Many times thru life I have seen how I can easily feel so unloved and unwanted simply because I wasn’t included. Thankfully I know that God loves me always.
I can’t wait for the webcast tomorrow night! Inside chatter is perpetual. We have to take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ. Much easier said than done, we all know. But, through His strength, not our own, it CAN be done.
I think we tend to be harder on ourselves than anybody else, making an easy target for the inside chatter to sneak in. But Gods word is truth, and inside chatter is always laced with a lie. and when we let the truth penetrate our lives and really soak it up, that lie begins to unravel at the seems and truth and clarity come bursting in like a flood!
It’s worse when you’re laying in bed and can’t sleep. When you have kids you worry about their inner chatter and hope and pray you can find the right words.
Wow! We are all so much alike! I’m fifty-one and still battling the inside negative chatter at times. Really looking forward to the webcast. Thank you for your ministry!
Haven’t read “Unglued” yet, but learned about really personalizing and memorizing scripture while going through “Made to Crave.” We were just talking at Bible study last night about dealing with negative self-talk, so maybe “Unglued” needs to be next on our list.
Thank you so much Lysa for sharing this post. My husband and I pastor a church in Oklahoma and I find myself either feeling this way or being blamed for leaving others out. Often times as women we do place our worth on others……. others opnions, others involvement in our lives vs. others lives. But, our value & worth is found in Christ alone. We were redeemed & called out for His purpose. Thanks again.
I love that term “inside chatter”. It still amazes me in my 30’s how some of those “defining” moments from childhood still creep in trying to influence me as an adult. I did have a true defining moment in my early adult life. I truly found that all of those things my mind tried to tell me would bring joy were temporary. Things come and go, people come and go, this life is a flashing moment. What truly matters is His kingdom. My “inside chatter” directs me to focus on my personal little kingdom and it is a daily work with Christ to keep my eyes on HIS kingdom.I am here for Him, not ME. That is my struggle.
I am constantly, after having a conversation with someone, replaying it over and over and criticizing myself: “you shouldn’t have said that”, “why didn’t you just keep quiet?”, etc. Hoping to eliminate some of my self doubt/inside chatter this year!!!
What a great giveaway. I have been wanting to read unglued for sometime . My inner voice needs me to feed it grace so we both can stay positive.
I deal with inner chatter and self doubt everyday, it seems to be my biggest opening for the devil to play with my mind. Everyday I pray, study, and ask God to guide me and to silence these negative thoughts. Everyone has their demons and this is mine.
That sounds like what our brains say – give us inside chatter constantly. That is also how the devil knows how to dig in that inside chatter – especially if you have said it out loud. But God hears your thoughts – the inside chatter – and tries to plant seeds of goodness. I learned that the inside chatter about what might not happen and you wish it did is not the whole of it – ” I can’t put the whole of my identity into the smallness of this situation.” Thank you for your thoughts on this!
Hi Lysa! I recently finished the 21 day challenge devotional from the You Version Bible app. It was amazing! Each day I felt so empowered and encouraged, and it has been easier to silence that negative chatter in my mind. I’m taking baby steps toward being completely healthy and fulfilled by God alone.
I know that the key to joy, rather than momentary happiness, is being in God’s Word every day! I have just started in this journey, and I’m so excited about where God is taking me.
I look forward to the podcast! Thank you for being a constant source of encouragement in my life, Lysa! 🙂
Girl, I tell ya, “inside chatter” has held me captive for so many years. One of Satan’s many Strongholds over me. I am 51 and still struggle with “acceptance” and “worthiness” and “am I intelligent enough”? But it is not my cross to bear, now is it? Nope, I rebuke the enemy and give it to God, who has strengthen me. Oh, I take the cross back sometimes (don’t get me wrong), and have me a little pity party but boy does it get heavy! Thank you for crashing the one I was having today with your message. I feel so much better now. I’m looking forward to the webcast tomorrow…it will be my first. 🙂
I have been out of church for several years due to some stupid mistakes I have made. Recently I started going back to church and praying my way through my struggles. The “inside chatter” is constant trying to keep me out of church giving me every excuse to believe I am not worthy. But by the grace of God I know that I am and to just keep praying for strenght!
I have been out of church for several years due to some stupid mistakes I have made. Recently I started going back to church and praying my way through my struggles. The “inside chatter” is constant trying to keep me out of church giving me every excuse to believe I am not worthy. But by the grace of God I know that I am and to just keep praying for strength!
I never thought to call what was happening inside my head negative chatter until I read the book Unglued. I have learned that all that negativity does not come from others. It’s not what others have said or are saying about me. Now, I am making “imperfect progress” in silencing that chatter. 🙂
I always have the ‘Inside Chatter’ going on since it seems as if I cannot have a good girlfriend. I think what is wrong with me that people don’t want to be around me. I daily remind myself that the only person who will be my BFF through it all is Christ. No matter what I do, He will be there for me. When the time is right, God will bring me that BFF in the ‘flesh’ at His perfect timing. When that happens its going to amazing!!!
I am still learning how to deal with the “inside chatter”. My biggest issue is with my husbands ex-wife who dislikes me and tries to turn their kids against me. I can’t let her get to me and make me feel like I am not good enough bc God told me I AM!
My inside chatter has been telling me something for a long time but until recently I haven’t recognized it’s impact in my life…lt’s been like a low hum, vibrating under all the regular chatter of my usual days.
It’s the lie that says life here on earth is a part of the curse. That the blessing of life is going home to be with the Lord when you die.
And alhough it’s true that all of the pain of life, the strife and heartache, will cease when we die, I’ve begun to understand that the life that God has given us here and now is the just the BEGINNING of the blessing of eternal life found in Christ.
You know, my oldest daughter is 7. She is alert and aware and increadibly curious. I’ve been cringing these past few weeks at every mention of the word “Abortion” or “Roe v. Wade” due to it’s 40 anniversary. I know that one day soon I will have to tell her, in the simplest terms what these words mean. For those who have walked this road, I’m sure it’s not like glossing over Santa Claus.It’s real and wrong and it’s reality is unthinkable…and it happens everyday, all day long in our land we call a “Christian Nation”.
But secretly, I think I’ve been “okay” with abortion because of this lie about life that has warped my mind. Because really, if the true blessing of living doesn’t come until after life on earth ends, then aren’t we doing all these babies a favor? Shocking that a Believer thinks that way, but that is the end of my thinking.
That’s been the uncovered chatter of my heart for a long, long time…and I’m only just starting to see it for the life stealing lie that it is…Thank you for letting me piece this together.
my inside chatter seems to creep in every once in a while. it comes in form of being super mom. I always feel like I don’t do enough for my girls, like everyone else seems to be doing more. more crafts, activities, reading, etc. I do a lot with my girls, but tend to compare my mothering to someone elses. But then God calls me back and says, you’re exactly where your suppose to be. He reminds me that I’m a work in progress and although I try, I simply can’t be super mom…at least not on my own with out HIS help. I may not be a fashionable, skinny, healthy eating, crafty, or whatever else as some others…but my daughters love me just the same and more important my God loves me more!
For me the hardest part has been to stop and recognize the source rather than just accepting the chatter as truth. Once I realize the source I can take that thought captive and replace it with the truth God has said about me in His word! It’s amazing the difference that makes in all my plans, actions and interactions with others, so it’s not just for us but for those who live and work with us as well. Can’t wait for the webcast and for my Wednesday night study where we are doing “Unglued”!
Wow, this hit home today, not just with me, but with my daughter. This isn’t just an issue with women, I see this with men also, since I supervise men in the workplace. God’s timing is amazing!
I have, like many others, allowed the inside chatter control me for years. It’s interesting that I have allowed it to decide what others think about a situation when in the reverse, I’d NEVER want someone to let their inside chatter decide what I think. Why do we let this happen!?!
My church small group is studying Soul Detox and it covered the topic of our thoughts and how it can impact our lives. I definitely could use a lesson that goes deeper on this issue.
I’ve learned that the inner chatter is related to my past and not my current reality. I am NEW IN CHRIST and each day is a gift. I have to replace those negative thoughts with positive ones. I get inspiration from OUTSIDE sources like the bible, good books, encouraging blogs (like yours!) or from good friends and my husband! I just pray that one day, the inner chatter will be much more positive!
I have learned that I have both good and bad inside chatter. Funny that today’s Women of Faith Daily email was about “cussing thoughts.” That is exactly the bad kind of inside chatter that I get sometimes. There are some days where I feel the bad chatter is greater than the good. There are even times when I can not discern whether my chatter is good or bad, whether it is God speaking within me or the devil. It is during times like these that I especially need to immerse myself in scripture in prayer. I need to dig even deeper to find my answers and there is only One who can give me the answers that I need.
you talk too much, you are stupid, for goodness sake act like a lady, These are some of my yucky chatter I still fight with But I am precious in Gods sight and He has reminded me that I take my self worth from Him not others and He made me so he thinks I am fine just this way.
I have found that the chatter in my head shapes my whole outlook on life. When I start to think that I have been wronged and make up all these stories about how I was offended, its hard to come back from even if it is not true. And sometimes when I may truly have the right to be upset but the talk in my head it understanding and positive. I move through the issue without it affecting me much at all. If I could find the switch that kept my mind on the right track, my life would be that much more productive and fulfilling!
The last two years have been an amazing time for me in dealing with ‘inside chatter’. It means everything to me and my peace of mind to know and realize who I am in Christ. I am so thankful for the Holy Spirit and the Word of God reminding me that I was worth the sacrifice that Christ made for me. Wow! How much He loves me!
Comparisons. Negativity. I’m not doing it right. Not enough. I’m failing. If I linger in this chatter, it cripples.
BUT GOD steps in and says,
“Krista, you are known inside and out. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Yes, made for every task before you today and for each day to come. There will be nothing I throw your way that I will not equip you to do. As long as you stay close to ME. I will fill in the gaps when needed, and carry you through rough waters. And when we celebrate the joys, glory and honor will go before me, because we know the origin of all good things.
I will change your thinking. Renew your heart. And fill you with the hope that leads to life victorious.”
I have struggled with “inside chatter” my whole life. When I was 29 I went on my Emmaus walk and learned that who I am is o.k., but I still chattered. Over the past 5 years I have learned some ways to stop all the chatter about pleasing everyone in everything I do, but it’s still a struggle. I need to get these books and see just how much God thinks I’m perfect in all ways.
I have learned that allowing negative chatter makes me my own worst enemy. I have also learned that what other people think about me is none of my business. Barring issues of eternal significance, things are only as bad as you believe that they are. You always act out what you believe- the battle is truly in the mind. I would LOVE to win the loot!!! 🙂
I need to clear my mind more often. Hope I can win the prize and get the help I need.
Can relate to this blog posting! And it happened yesterday to my 9 year old son- who went to play with a friend who was having a birthday party he didn’t get invited to.
Looking forward to learning about helping my inside chatter!
I have not read unplugged yet but I feel from what I understand that my inside chatter tends to come from fear, fear of what others think of me, fear of how I look, fear of failure..
Just realized I put unplugged instead of unglued that is what I get for doing 3 things at once 🙂 I do look forward to reading your blog and getting the books in the future.
Inside Chatter has driven my life for @ 44 years. I thought I had grown beyond it until Facebook came along and I rediscovered all of those negative thoughts as if I were 8, 10, 12, or 16 all over. I was bullied for the majority of my elementary years – made fun of for my behind. Now, people pay money to have a behind like mine! But that inner chatter started all over again when one of my classmates mentioned the horrible name they used to call me. It defined my life and still does. I’m not over it.
Another horrible incident due to Facebook has caused even more inner chatter. A lifelong friend (known since Kindergarten) defriended me without telling me why. There was no argument, no discussions, no nothing! One day we were friends on FB, the next we weren’t. She wouldn’t return my text messages or calls. When a mutual friend inquired, she wouldn’t tell her why. It left me with horrible feelings of abandonment and I find that on a daily basis there is “inner chatter” as to what I must have done to cause her to defriend me.
I know that God is all I need. Sometimes, it’s hard convincing the inner chatter of that.
As i read this article, I could feel those still painful arrows of self doubt that pierced so long ago. We tend to carry the hurts for far too long and allow it to shape us. I know I still allow the self doubt to rule when faced with struggles at work. This will help me to focus up instead of in. Thank you!
Through the years, many life changes….some good and some bad…..have helped me to gain a better perspective on some of the hurts that I have experienced along the way. Even so, there are times that I find myself creeping back into thoughts that bring me back to those times. I try not to let those thoughts grip me….I realize now that it’s some of those memories which have led me to journey toward a place in my life where I try remember what a person’s actions and attitudes can do to others. I have learned that how I respond to old inside feelings can led me to a much more positive outlook as I move forward.
What I have learned about inside chatter is it will always come. It will come when I least expect it. It will most assuredly come when I am at my weakest. But when I am weak, He is strong. I just have to take my hurt heart to my tender, loving God to remind myself of Whose I am and how He sees me to turn that chatter to what He says about me.
Negative self talk is a hard one. I think I expose it as a lie. I still feel bad about leaving people out of my parties growing up. My mom would give me a limit and there was always one person I would end up excluding. I was so sensitive to that one person, I felt horrible.
My inside chatter these days is mostly about my children. My mother was always short tempered and quick to throw out words that cut to my core. So anytime I lose my patience with my children I feel a huge amount of guilt that I’m hurting them much like she did to me. Even though I’m aware of our stark differences, it still pains me to think that I’m not doing a good job as their mother. I am reassured by God’s word that my children are such a blessing to us all. I loved when I read that “Bad moments do not make bad moms.” I know when to apologize and ask for forgiveness from God and also from my children. They will understand that it’s ok to make mistakes and that none of us are anywhere near perfect. I also want them to know when to say they are wrong so they can apologize and be forgiven.
It’s an ongoing struggle that is echoed by sisters here. I’m thankful for the reminders such as comments posted here, and other readings God sends my way. One of my greatest fear/concerns is that my critical thoughts/words are affecting how I interact and raise my kids. I want them to thrive on God’s Word and promises and to know and feel loved. But I’m setting such a poor example.
When I was growing up my dad always introduced my younger sister as this is my pretty daughter and then he would look at me and say oh that’s Tammy. I grew up thinking I was not good enough or pretty enough. I have learned through The Lord I’m just as good as anyone else.
I battle with this still. But i do know that this is a weakness of mine in which Satan attacks. And i have to remember how to fight this w/positive thoughts and how wonderful our Father is.
I know that when the inside chatter starts if I will stop and pray and think about God’s promises and who He says that I am then I will think the right things. It is through His power that I am able to think the way He wants me to.
I usually experience inner chatter whenver I’m stressing over something or there’s a decision I need to make in my life. When I focus on God through meditation and prayer and praise music, and also when I make that choice to replace that chatter with positive thoughts, that’s when I can clear my mind.
My inside chatter: you are not good enough. Just play it safe that’s where you belong. Keep working with certain clients that’s your comfort zone those with more money more talent are out of your league. Well, I am good enough, smart enough to handle all types of clients and The Lord will give me the favor and wisdom that I need!
I relate to your inner chatter post in the way that my inner chatter is either building me up or wanting to tear me down. An example, this past weekend I went to a women’s retreat & we played a game where someone puts a sticker on your back and you have to guess who or what you are. I didn’t figure out what I was & forgot about the sticker. About an hour later my hair got stuck in the sticker on my back & I had a prompting from The Lord, “you still have this sticker on your back, & what was put on you is not who you are; please remove this label, my daughter. ” I took the sticker off & what did it say, “I’m a hippo.” Wow! How many times has my internal chatter spoke these words out! I was so blessed as I have read Made To Crave & Unglued that this label did not stick to me 🙂 I am in the process of letting my Father speak truth over me and letting my internal chatter be redeemed! PTL!
to me inside chatter alot of the times is the devil telling me one thing when in reality God is also trying to tell me one thing and more so i listen at times to the Devil and not to God and what promises and plans he has for my life!
I have learned the hard way that inside chatter can and will be destructive if you let it. I have had to learn the hard way in life that others do not define me by what they do or say. It is very hurtful even now being a Mom if I find out my daughter and I have not been invited to a play group that has some of my very best friends in it. Then in my quiet time I realize it could easily be something as small as an oversight. The devil wants me to believe the lies that I was left out on purpose. I choose to trust in God’s holy word that builds us up and encourages us in hard times. I love the ladies of Proverbs 31 ministries!! You have each helped me get “back on track” since our son died 🙁 I dearly love you all and am so grateful for your love, your tender hearts and your ministry of reaching out to other women. Thank you for all you do. Be blessed!
I have learned/ am learning a lot of lessons on inside chatter. Mine started at a young age, not from friends but from my relationship with my mother. I am now a married mom of two girls (4 and 2) and I can see the effect of my words if I don’t WORK at making them encouraging and full of wisdom. I am sure my mom was doing the best she knew how back then, but I know a different way and can help my girls to fend off negative thoughts instead of believing them to be true.
It is interesting how subtle inner chatter is (often I don’t even recognize what I am thinking) but the impact of inner chatter is anything but unnoticeable. Insecurities that lead to assumptions about others and their motives. Taking out my negative inner chatter on my children or husband instead of dealing with myself. I am who God says I am, not Satan. Praise God!
Your book Unglued, was such an eye opening moment for me. The horrible “Inside Chatter” was starting to win. As a Mom you always have to be a rock for your husband and your children, but that doesn’t show our insides. How “little” we feel at times and how we can beat up on ourselves mentally after the day is over or moment. I feel like I finally found a way to conquer this. I’m not perfect and it is still there but I know I am not alone.. like you said “Imperfect Progress” right… but atleast I am finally moving foward with God right by myside..
What a universal struggle among so many of us women. (both hands raised here…wasn’t negative talk supposed to end in high school?) 🙂 I am constantly having to change the words in my mind to refocus on Christ and less of my gut reaction (which is usually fueled by negative emotions not at all prompted by the Spirit). I find when I take a split second to stop and think of God, he gives me a few more seconds to take a deep breath and refocus my mind. He is cheering me on and wants me to succeed. And, those moments that I do refocus back on Him and less of myself are beautiful and a great step forward. It’s such a daily, sometimes minute-by-minute battle with myself. Yet, I keep thinking if I make turning to Christ my first reaction in ALL circumstances it will become my habit…and my peace…and my joy. All good things that I’m striving for.
Looking forward to tomorrow night’s webcast!
that inside chatter is a constant battle that can be tiring at times but not to live there and let the enemy have a place! but to push through with the Lord and what He says is true, is where the battle is won! 🙂
Sitting at home, alone was a perfect post today as I discussed behavior of friends with my teenage daughter last night! It is so hard as a mom to see our children suffering! I tried to give her the real approach of not being embarrassed by their behavior as it is their actions and not hers! I also reminded her that God has a different plan for her life and he may feel that loosening ties is appropriate right now! Don’t focus on the action as much as you need to focus on Gods message to you through all this behavior! Thank you for a catchy title that caught my attention!
I’ve learned that inside chatter can bring you down, way down if you let it. What works for me is to analyze (just for a little while) whatever situation happened, pray on it and take some lesson from it to do better in the future. We are not perfect, nor should we strive to be! All that matters is we keep moving along at our own pace and God will take care of the rest.
Lysa, I first saw you on the K-Love Unglued webcast and I listened in our Friday when you co-hosted. I am really excited for your webcast tomorrow night and Unglued is next on my reading list!
Oh my, has the inner chatter been busy in my head over the last several years. I am going through yet another divorce. Trying to find a job, work through all the emotions of having 2 children by two fathers, two failed marriages. There is constant doubt ringing in my ears. I pray everyday that I know I serve a Big God and that my problems are small compared to the Big things he has in my future!!!?
Ohhhh pesky “inside chatter”…. How it comes to attack me every day. Whether it be about me as a friend, me as a mother, me as a wife. It never fails to keep my head spinning every day in one way or another. But the good news is, God’s Word is full of promises of hope and is contained in a very heavy book that easily has all the answers I’m looking for, plus the wonderful ability to literally smack that inside chatter right out of my head. I’m excited for this webcast… It’s always nice to know you’re not alone in dealing with something and gain insight into ways to keep up the progress. Thanks for having this! 🙂
I had this inside chatter going on, but I centered it around the brokenness in my life. “I’m too messy, so they avoid me” is often what I thought. And while that may be true, I’ve learned it’s no big deal. If they don’t like me or want to deal with me in the messiness of life, then that’s that. I can’t get hung up on their reasons. I have to rest in Christ. I came to this conclusion after much prayer and study. It was difficult at first. We all want to be liked. I even reflected on and took responsibility for my part. Was I difficult to be around? I think so. Yet I’m thankful for those who stayed around and saw me through. And those that didn’t? It’s ok.
I have been struggling with this “inside chatter” for years. Growing up I pretty much felt stupid, ugly and worthless. It so much affected the way I lived as a young adult and how I related to my Heavenly Father. I still struggle with this today as a wife and mother of teens. It gets better at times and then bam it hits so hard. I have to remind myself God didn’t not make trash, which is how I looked at myself often. I am not a mistake. He has a plan for my life and no matter how I FEEL, when I hear that “chatter”, it’s what I KNOW about God and His love and plan for my life that remain true. It has taken me a while to get there, but reading God’s word, hearing others and their struggles help.
I am a mess right now and the inner chatter is louder than ever in my life lately. I pray for everyone else in my life and I guess I forget to pray for myself. Please pray with me that I can quit beating myself up and find my smile again. I am really looking forward to this webcast, God knows I need it.
My “thought life” and “inner chatter” is something that I work on DAILY….sometimes even moment by moment. I have learned to shift my focus to the promises of God when my inner chatter starts contradicting what I know is God’s best for me. Honestly, I lost 200 pounds in 2005 and 2006 and allowed stress and that inner chatter to talk me right back into 100 pounds. So, for the last year, I have been working on it. Made to Crave makes more sense than any diet book, article, show, etc I have ever seen.
I remember being in the eight grade, hiding in the bathroom during my lunch period…rocking myself back and forth asking why the girls at my school didn’t like me, why I didn’t have friend…. If I only knew then what I know now. People will always fail you…. but God, never will. Put your faith and trust in our Lord Jesus Chris and you will live unselfishly, lovingly, forgivingly. You will experience Love, Grace, Peace and Happiness like you’ve never had before.
My battle with inside chatter seems to continue every moment of every day. Even writing this I keep thinking, “Don’t write that. It’s dumb, which means you’re dumb. How can you be so dumb?” And I worry about how my inside chatter affects my children, especially my daughter. I’m working so hard on quieting it, but some days it doesn’t feel like it. I pray for strength several times a day to quiet the inside chatter.
So many days we live those deflating words out in our lives not realizing that we don’t have to. God has chosen us as His children, His heirs and Jesus has died for our sins, all of them! Yet each morning we have a choice; we can walk in the freedom that God’s love provides for us or we can let Satan’s words tear us apart from the inside out. We have to be intentional each day to decide which side we chose and to walk it out. Maybe silencing our own chatter will allow us to hear truth’s that God would like to speak into our life!
Ugh. That inside chatter can be debilitating! I try to replace it right away with God’s Truth. What other people say can build us up or tear us down, and the enemy will take advantage when we’re already down to make it even worse. We have to arm ourselves with God’s Word and try to recognize when the enemy is planting his lies so we can stop him in his tracks.
I have learned a little about the inside chatter. I have not read your book yet as I recently heard about it. I am really wanting to add it on my list. I recently grew deeper in my relationship with Christ. Thank you
Inside Chatter has been a huge and constant battle for me. This is the #1 way the devil tries to defeat me. I cannot wait for the podcast! Thanks for being an amazing source of encouragement!!
The inside chatter…what I struggle with daily, hourly, every minute. What I want to prevent happening to my little girl. I pray the Lord’s voice will overtake that endless, damaging chatter in her heart and mind.
Our group just finished the Unglued bible study in Dec. It was sooooo good!! Oh sister, that inner chatter can really put me into a state of fear! We are now doing Karen Ehman’s study, Let it Go. I am applying this to my inner chatter – Let.it.Go!!
We have to quiet those negative inside voices in order to hear God. I have recently started to meditate, and allowing my mind just a few minutes to focus has done wonders for stopping the negative and letting Gods answers and directions come thru!
HI Lysa,
The biggest load was lifted when I finally learned to stop listening to inside chatter and start listening to my Savior! I literally lived in fear of hearing or dealing with anything negative. Once I experienced anything negative my mind would take over and roll it over and over and over until it was either bigger than it started or so ingrained in me, that it actually became me. I’m grateful for God’s word in changing my heart and mind. I am also grateful for coming across “Unglued”, which gave me a new perspective on how i processed my thoughts. God Bless you and your ministry!
I find that “Inside Chatter” can be very detrimental. It’s so easy to listen to yourself and get off track.
This is a constant struggle for me. I’ve never felt included so I don’t have many women friends. I tend to stick in my safety zone with my husband and family but sometimes I wish I was more of a risk taker and didn’t listen to the chatter
Yes the inside chatter will always come but greater is he who is in me than he who is in the world. Staying prayed up gives me strength to fight the enemies lies!!
Inside chatter can be shut off if I allow it to, by focusing on what is true. Not always easy, but we can ask for God to help us.
I really struggle with inside chatter. I have memorized verses to help me combat it. Verses such as Phil 4:8, and Psalms where it says “he will keep in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you” and promises that God has our best interest at heart. Beat way to beat out the negative is to let God come in and fill us with His love!
I just wanted to share a “God moment” that I had regarding the negative chatter. I am a nursing student in my final semester of nursing school and there is a girl in my class who has decided her life goal is to make my life miserable. Honestly she has just been a bully to me, making fun of me behind my back, starting rumors about me, and trying to turn others in the class against me. Oh and we are 23 years old, in college, not high school. I am realizing that this junk doesn’t stop after high school. I am the type of person who just sits back and acts like nothing is wrong while I am in class, and clinical, but then I go home and cry. Over the past year of this, I have built up so much anger and bitterness towards this girl, that has really affected all areas in my life, including my grades. I reached a breaking point last Friday night after something was said on our class Facebook page. I realized I could no longer deal with this and I needed help. I cried out to God, and begged Him to take this pain away and give me strength to believe in myself and regain all the self confidence and self esteem I had lost. After I finished praying I got on an app on my phone called “Life Lessons by Max Lucado”. I chose the book of Job, thinking it would be a lesson on patience but before I chose the chapter of Job, I asked God to please show me something. I randomly chose a chapter and the life lesson was titled “Zophar’s sermon on the wicked man”. The lesson was about anger and bitterness and how destructive they can be to your spiritual life. It was spot on to what I was dealing with, as I read through the lesson, I had goose bumps. I felt God’s presence and knew He had heard and answered my prayer. Today I received an email telling me about this webcast. This is so perfect for what is going on in my life right now and I can not wait to hear the webcast! Thank you for this opportunity! I know that I need to realize that I am enough, and God made me special and for a purpose, and I can not let other people bring me down, and cause the negative chatter in my life.
When I was is high school, inside chatter was all I ever heard. I was never one of the popular girls, yet I longed to be included with their group something terrible..I would listen when they would talk about me behind my back because my mom didn’t drive a new car, we always had some salvage car my absentee father would drag up when he decided to help us, or that I was trailer trash because I lived in a mobile home. Everyday I felt more and more put down and as time went I started to loser faith that I had previously found in jr high. I let it consume me day in and day out. In time I’ve learned that I shouldn’t want to be what others want me to be or be ashamed of what I have, because there is always someone who would love to have whatever that might be. Each and everything I have now, which still isn’t much ( I’m only 22, still living with my wonderful mother, & in nursing school full time) but I am so thankful for all I do have. My high school experiences made me learn how cruel and down right mean kids are and adults as well. The devil attacks us in everyday battles and many of those are still the same feelings of inadequatecy that others push on us! I’m still a struggling Christian but I am growing each and everyday with our amazing God, who never once gave up on me even when I didn’t feel I deserved his love!!
I thank you for your blog today because I was struggling again with these same issues being in nursing school but your blog reminded me to turn to The Lord!
Have a blesses day
Negative thoughts affect us even before we are sometimes aware. Most of these have been with us a very long time and has become our normal. I am learning to recognize them and their consequences. This is a daily battle that requires much prayer, trust, and faith but through His grace gets better daily as well.
I think the most important thing I’ve learned about inside chatter, is that I need to validate the feelings that caused it in the first place and politely ignore any nonsense that came about because of it. I often remind myself of positive things to counteract the nonsense inside chatter. I’ve had the opportunity to grow abundantly over the past year and learn some amazing things about myself, one being where “inside chatter” starts. I’m so thankful to God for giving me the opportunity to firmly place my identity in Him and not on that “inside chatter” that I either misinterpreted, or heard correctly from someone, but I didn’t need to make it a law in my life story.
Reading “Unglued” and can relate to every page. So glad I’m not alone in my thoughts and behavior. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and wisdom.
Its amazing how I can feel like a little girl again when an invitation is not extended. I’ll admit, my mother didn’t do a good job helping me put a stop to that inner dialogue; in fact, she fueled it by some harsh comments toward me. However, I am learning to find my identity in Christ with each day and realize that other people’s intentions are not always “all about me.” While its not always easy to remember, I am trying to claim that truth in my adulthood and hope I can raise my children with the knowledge of identity that I didn’t learn.
Just this past Sunday our pastor spoke about the power in Speaking Blessings and Words of Encouragement into eachother’s lives. I’ve learned that we have to also speak the same blessings and encouraging words into our own lives. Often times, when my mind starts to wonder or those voices inside my head start raising up; I have to make a contious decision to remember God’s truth and not give in to those thoughts and feels that come along side. Words are powerful!
I find that when the inside negative chatter starts overhwelming me, then I talk out loud to Jesus, my friend. I can’t seem to carry on both conversations in my head at once. It works! 🙂
Inside chatter can stop me from doing something real for God. Things that are really important because the chatter keeps me do used on me. That’s what the Emmy wants for us to keep us feeling unwanted, alone and thinking I’m the only one so we won’t go beyond ourselves to a world who needs His love.
My heart’s desire is to STOP negative inside chatter. I no longer wish to partake in it! Through God’s word and prayer, I’m gonna squelch it. Thanks for the opportunity to win a prize! Would LOVE to win!
I remember how these things affected me in high school and growing up. I would have been upset if I wasn’t chosen or invited to a party. I thought it was the end of the world… however, it wasn’t. I wish I would have let a lot of stuff just slip on by me and not affect me. As an adult, it is not important to me what others think of me. I know that because I believe in Jesus Christ and his love shows through me always. It is important to me to raise my sons into Men of God and to realize that little things in life (like not being invited to a party) are not really important in the big scheme of life. My heart aches for my sons when they are upset because of the chatter. I pray they learn to let it go and not let it define them. God is who defines my family and we need to trust whole-heartedly in Him, for he will make the difference in our lives.
Inside Chatter is most often highly destructive. It is hard to get away from and getting help from others means 1)admitting that it is there, 2) realizing that it is detrimental and 3) opening yourself up to someone else’s scrutiny and help. – so vewry hard to do.
May God richly bless your ministry.
There is something special about sharing God’s love with those around you.
I have learned that there is constant “inside chatter” all the time and that that chatter derives from many things including insecurities all the way from childhood to yesterday. I have also found that what I feed my mind determines the tune of this chatter. If I dwell on the negativeness of my job, family situations, personal insecurities etc. that is what chatters away but if I purposely set my eyes on God and things of Him like His word, Christian music, positive things, the chatter changes it’s tune. I am also learning that if I start my day out worshiping Him, the chatter bugs are much much happier throughout the day.
Thank you so much for sharing your words with us. God bless you. 🙂
For years I listened to the negative chatter, telling myself I wasn’t good enough. Then God showed me that I was loved by Him-He created me to be perfectly me. I have to shut down the negative self talk when it starts and the only way to do that is to remind myself who I am in Him. I have to remember to shift my focus back to God. I have also passed this on to my teenage daughter, reminding her, on those tough teenage days, that she is exactly who God created her to be, that she is beautiful from the inside out. The negative chatter is just lies meant to distract us from what God has planned for us.
First of all, thank you for bringing attention to this subject and for allowing God to use you in such a powerful way!
This negative chatter tells me that I am not good enough. It also tells me that I have to protect myself because someone is probably trying to take advantage of me somehow. My father left when I was young but not young enough for me to forget a few words he repeated to me often. “You’re very smart. You need to stay on your toes. You need to be watching out.” Yes, these thoughts helped me do better in school, I believe. But being left by my dad in early elementary, I believe, propelled me to become a people-pleaser. It gave me that attention, that warmth, that smile, that sense of ‘approval’. If I pleased the person then I felt that I was ‘good enough’ at least for THEM! Then on another note, I knew I had some intelligence in me, but not as smart as others thought I was. “I really am not good enough for any good thing. I may ‘look it’ but I am not REALLY that smart. I’m just alert, watching out, staying on my toes.” Those last three beliefs are the way I see the world today. I am always on my toes, watching out, and alert. Someone is trying to rip me off! I am constantly looking for the very best deal. I look exhaustively for the best sales because that store is trying get my money. On big purchases I am never quite satisfied with the deal because there is probably a deal out there I didn’t find. I should have kept looking. Should have been more alert. This is all so sick! I am tired of this negative chatter that goes on in my head. It drives my life. It was instilled in me by my father (who btw, left us for another woman after 20 yrs of marriage), and I want it gone! I am a faithful believer in Jesus, but this chatter keeps me tied, it rules my being, I want to be freed!!!
Inside chatter can make or break me. I have to be in God’s word and meditate on what is right, pure and noble.
I’ve realized that the “inside chatter” comes when I am at my weakest. It might be weak because I’m tired or sick. Or it might be weak spirtually from not spending time in prayer or devotionals. As long as I take the time that I need to take care of “me”, I can stop the chatter when it starts. So very destructive if it’s allowed to go on.
I cant wait to listen to the simulcast. Altho I have a wonderful family of believers around me who support me- the abuse I went thru as a child left some negative chatter in head. Its a constant battle. I’ll be packing for a trip to TX to see my son graduate from the Air Force. Is there a way to listen to it again when I return from Tx??
Thank you
The only way I have found to successfully change the ‘inside chatter” in my head, is to read or listen to what God says about me or the situation I am facing. I am so grateful for Christian music!!! Listening to praise lyrics and songs about God’s faithfulness help to “change the channel” in my heart and stop the cycle of negativity reeling inside my soul. LITERALLY CHANGE THE CHANNEL YOU ARE LISTENING TO AND HEAR A DIFFERENT TUNE!!
I had a problem with inside chatter just this weekend. I celebrated a birthday earlier last week and because it was the middle of the week, my husband and I did not make plans to actually celebrate the day until the weekend. Saturday morning came and we were thinking about some fun things we could do while incorporating the children into the celebration. We decided a night of bowling fun with the kids and our closest friends would be a nice plan. Unfortunately, planning something with other families on the day of the event is not practical planning at all. We texted, emailed and called all of our closest family and friends, but to no avail, no one was available on such short notice. It seemed that everyone had already planned something for that night.
Immediately our inside chatter began for both my husband and I as we tried desperately to “get over” it and move on. Inside I started telling myself that I was not liked by anyone, even my own family members. I began replaying all the negative talk I’d heard through past communications with my friends, when they’d jokingly tell me I was being too sensitive or overly needy during times when I was low and needed a friend. I remembered being that short, chubby girl in school that no one wanted to talk to or sit with or mingle with because I didn’t look or talk or act the part that the rest of the girls did. I felt naked, violated and raw as my heart sunk into sadness. I was so numbed by my inside chatter that I crawled into bed, hid under the covers and cried for hours.
My husband also had a moment of inside chatter when he started to feel like that kid from his past again, when he wasn’t really as cool or fun to be around as his younger brother had been, or when he compared his talents to the talents of his brother and other family and friends, his didn’t quite measure up to what he thought was supposed to be qualities of a good, godly man/husband/father/brother/friend and those same feelings of inadequacy and imperfection rolled over him like a tidal wave.
God usually gives my husband the ability to turn off the inside chatter and see the truth through His eyes. It doesn’t always happen before he does something in reaction to what he’s thinking or feeling, and it was true for this time as well. But, he was able to turn off the chatter, turn to the Lord and accept himself the way he is-the way the Lord made him to be and the way the Lord sees him. Once he was able to do this for himself, he was also able to comfort me, to help me turn off the chatter and remind me of my own identity in Christ and who I’ve been created to be, and who I will always be to the Lord, to my husband, to my family and to the friends who really do love me and care for me.
We both learned a valuable lesson in spontaneity, planning, and the little voice inside our heads that should always be filtered through the Holy Spirit before entering our hearts. That was the best birthday present I could have received this week, and it was right on time for a night of bowling and a nice Mexican dinner with my children!
Lysa-wow. Unfortunately, that “inside chatter” is all too familiar. When I hear it, I try to immediately recognize it as a lie from the enemy. Also, my pastor once said, “Don’t let anyone tell you what you’re worth. Jesus paid for you. Let HIM tell you what you’re worth.” I hang on to this and identify myself with Christ…as a princess of the Most High God!
Thanks for sharing your insight.
I tend to fall into a downward spiral of “chatter-guilt over chatter-guilt over guilt over chatter…” I need to remember that I am FREE from that. Looking forward to the webcasts!
I don’t hve your book, but have heard great things about you. This is a beautiful gift and I would love to have it. Thanks
We have so much in common! Too much negative inside chatter going on. It keeps us from being all God wants us to be! I’m looking forward to the webinar and the motivation to keep fighting the negative chatter! Thank you for your ministry!!!!
Ahhh…that negative inside chatter. It really can eat away at you and get you down. You can say, ignore it, it’s the evil one, but that is easier said than done. You need God to defeat these negative thoughts. With God all things are possible 🙂 I am just beginning on my journey, but with the help of my church and online bible studies with Proverbs 31 Ministries, I have the faith and know that God will provide my endurance. Blessings Lysa for all that you do!
Your pink shirt birthday story gave me a pit in my stomach…So been there! I still struggle with negative self chatter way too much. Something that has helped me, though, is recognizing how selfish and self-focused it is. It all becomes about me and how I feel others find me uninteresting, undesirable, etc. So I make a point to look for ways I can serve others and pray for God to open up doors to deeper relationships with those around me!
Reading this article took me back to childhood times of never fitting in now realizing I never fit in there group but, I always fit in God group. There’s no need to worry God will always have us in the top of his list. And will always have a pink shirt with our name on them.
It is an encouragement site for me. Thank you Lysa.
I have not read any of your books but came upon you in my newsfeed. You wanted feedback on inner chatter. The last couple of years their was a lot of chatter about me and my girls. Let’s just say that my husband at the time was charged with multiple accounts of sexual assault and was sent to prison for 67 years with no parole. It was on our local news, newspapers etc. so it was hard for my kids. God stayed closer through all of this. I wanted to fight back with the same words but I couldn’t. He helped me understand why. It has been 4 years now and still some of the people that live on our street to this day will not acknowledge me or my girls. My girls are now teens and it is still hard for them to forgive. I have tried to help them understand that people deal with things in their own time and their own way. They still ask me why they blame us for what their dad did. Sometimes it is hard for me to answer and all I can think of is that maybe one day they will sit down and hear what God is telling them about us. Regarding the looks and words unspoken. We lift our head high. I do remind my girls that it is not for our neighbors to judge but God. Without him, we would be lost
Constant struggle for me but have definitely found that filling my mind with Gods truth is my best defense!
Inside chatter is just that….just chatter! I can allow it to depress me or encourage me depending on my attitude. The danger is not to become involved in the chatter yourself! Let every communication that proceeds out of my mouth be edifying to the glory of God!
I have dealt with the “inside chatter” pretty much my whole life. I have found that the best way to combat it is with the word and with prayer. I have scriptures posted at my computer at work as reminders. I also have the Proverbs 31 devotional and another one sent to my work email so that in addition to my morning devotions at home I have that to look forward to once I get to work. On facebook I get Lysa’s posts as well as the Proverbs 31 posts. These are always very uplifting to me and I enjoy them thoroughly. When the inside chatter starts due to a situation at work or from things co-workers or others say or just the enemy whispering in my ear I go to the word (or I can take a break and go to the other office and talk to my savior for a few minutes) I have read “Unglued” and “Crave” and enjoyed them both tremendously. Looking forward to the “inside chatter webcast tomorrow night. Thanks so much and God bless.
“Inside Chatter” typically makes us think of the negative events in our lives. With God’s help, however, we can use that “chatter” for good. Perhaps it’s relating to a friend who endured similar pain, we can empathize and be a loving, listening, caring friend. Let’s continue to ask our amazing Lord for help in re-directing our reactions to “chatter”, and use it to serve others. > With you, growing on our faith journey.
I can so relate! Ive never “fit in”…until I discovered God..its fine to be different
I am almost 60 years old and still deal with these feelings.thanks for the encouragement
I feel like that inside chatter feeds fears within me. Those fears keep me from serving God with all my heat and soul.
Thank you so much! I wish I could tell you how relevant this story is to me today. I’ve been wrestling with things that happened in my past, and I think your message to yourself is huge. I will refer back to this as I try to change my perspective, through the grace and mercy of Jesus.
Thanks again, Jennifer
I recently realized that I allow the “inside chatter” to get to me when I am stressed. I believe stress and inside chatter coincide together. I have been praying nonstop lately to help me see why I have been hearing all of this nonsense, and God has opened my eyes up and allowed me to see what It was. With my constant prayer, I have found that I have become less stressed and happier. God will truly take your worries/ stresses away, you just have to give them to Him. 😉 I look forward to tomorrow evening!!
I have learned that I can turn it off or redirect it!
Inside Chatter….. That is such a good way to explain it, all of those little thoughts that are always telling you: You can’t do that, you’re not pretty enough, just give up already and save yourself the embarrassment, you’re to young to do that, he’s to good of a man for you, and endless other thoughts. It’s just so hard sometimes to “let go and let God” let Him show you just how much He loves you! And how absolutely amazing you are♥ I had a friend tell me once years ago that “God doesn’t make junk” that He made each one of us in His likeness. How encouraging is that? To know that he loved us enough to make us like him? That is just so cool! It’s just so hard to remember sometimes how much He is there for us, and how truly blessed we are.
I feel this way a lot…and it stems mostly from church friends and family. It hurts when you don’t get invited to a party, small group or other outing regardless of your age. I’m 43 today, and there are a couple of people in my life who don’t include me ory family in things we once were top of mind for. Even though I try so hard not to let it bother me, it does. And it still feels like rejection no matter how you spin it:(
Unfortunately I struggle with Inside Chatter on a daily basis. Listening to it has caused so much pain & strife in EVERY area of my life. It causes me to lose my focus on God & His plan for me. It has also caused me to doubt in my walk with God, in my marriage, parenting, and as well as my friendships. It hurts. I try so hard not to listen to it but sometimes I give in. And boy when I do…DESTRUCTION and chaos!!
I have too often allowed inside chatter to shape me, to mold me. I assume I know what others are thinking and allow their “thoughts” to run wild in my mind. Especially in my relationships with women–“Your too bossy. You’re so abrasive. You think you know everything. You think you are Superwoman.” So, to avoid these “thoughts” from others, I simply don’t try to engage. I isolate before I am isolated. I ignore before I am ignored. This way, I am not hurt by what others “think” of me.
It is so hard to stop that Inside Chatter!! It rears it’s ugly head and tries to bring me down. I cry out to God at these times and turn it all over to Him!! I will not let other people define who I am!!! It is hard, but with my Father beside me, I CAN DO IT!!! Blessings!!
It’s seems that the more that goes wrong in a day, the chatter grows louder and more frequent. It’s so hard to tune it our when things are going downhill.
Inner Chatter is like a BAD recording playing over and over again in your head that you can’t turn off. I’ve found that the best way to silence the chatter is with God’s Word from the Bible or through song. It has helped me to speak the Word in declaration to myself, out loud, to counter the negativity of inside chatter.
“Inside chatter” is a major source of distraction in my life- much to my detriment! This article was without a doubt one I needed to read and thoroughly appreciated all the insight!
Thank you for being real,I plan to attend the webcast on 1/29/2013,and to read your Unglued book as well as the othr good reads when I win the incredible “Tiffany Blue” my youngest daughter is turning 24 on Feb 1st, and I thought what an awesome gift for her,she did not get a hot pink T-shirt,and was not chosen,a lady-in-waiting, and her identity in CHrist is being confirmed daily thankyou for your prayers!!
God will never leave you empty. He will replace everything you lost. If he asked you to put something down, it’s because he asked you to pick up something greater.
Having a special needs/severely handicapped son and a very critical family and also being the black sheep of the family, inside chatter has been a norm in my life until recently when I came to the realization that I will never meet my families expectations or get their stamp of approval. I can’t say that it has stopped the voices, yet but I’m really looking forward to this webcast to help me to push through what has even said by them and see (and actually believe) what’s been said by Him.
Inside Chatter is annoying. Yet, most of the time I listen to it more that I should and I tune out ever God. need to get rid of it! Thank you for this article.
I wasn’t a Jesus girl in high school….definitely could have saved a lot of heartache by putting my identity in Christ. Thankfully HE is my identity now! (in my mid 30’s). Repurposing my perspective upward ALWAYS helps in making my problems and circumstances smaller. We have a big God. Nothing is impossible for Him. He works all things together for our good…..we have to trust Him in the disappointments that He’s concerned with our future holiness…. not our current happiness. I have found much more joy though then I ever did before. God is our ultimate Ali. Thanks for reminding me of where to keep my WHOLE identity and just let the other disappointments pass— instead of adding my interpretations and insecurities TO the disappointment and listening to that “other guy” and his lies!!!
I struggle everyday with inside chatter, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was 16 and struggled for years about how others treated me and knew that I couldn’t live up to anyone’s great expectations. It was when my husband disappeared about a year ago I received a book called a confident heart and did that book study and today my whole life has changed one day at a time I am loved by Jesus and that’s the one I need to answer to when those thoughts come through I go to him and feel his loving arms and acceptance.
I have learned that the best way to quiet that noise is to turn up the volume on God’s word. The inside chatter always seems to be loudest when I am alone or feeling overwhelmed.
Isn’t is amazing how timely an email or devotion can be. I was in my old high school gym yesterday sittng next to someone who was causing that chatter to rattle around in my head. I thought… You are almost 50 years old and you still let these people get to you that way. I really thought I had conquered it. Then my 10 year old daughter comes up the stairs after her basketball game sits next to me, and I see tears welling up in her eyes. They did lose their game, so I thought she was upset about this. Lo and behold, someone in the locker room had made her feel like a complete failure. I listened to her whisper to me the mean things said and my heart just swelled up with hurt for her. I hope to have time to listen in on the webcast. I have had a vision for some time that I would love to have a ministry for girls who let the inside chatter take over their lives. Thank you so much for your timely devotion
Hm, inside chatter…what would happen when I decide to fill that inside me with all of the TRUTH that my Lord Jesus Christ says about me? Yes, I’m certainly not “there” yet but I can say, He that has begun a good work in me has promised to complete it. I am building my faith in Him daily. Somehow, the deepest cuts have been the longest to heal, as they originate from who satan knows will inflict the deepest wound..our first “family”..ie. mother, father, siblings. Let us show how your love heals best!
Remembering who I am through Christ…and that He alone validates me. I have to daily remind myself, that His opinion is the only one that matters…because afterall, He sees every part of any given situation…and comforts me when I call on Him. Another thought from a Beth Moore book…Proverbs 31:25 reminds me, I’m clothed in strength and dignity…clothed by God, and no one can take that away, unless I allow it.
Joy C
This ‘inside chatter’ is at times mind numbing. And quite frankly, ridiculous… Women are so hard on ourselves to be as good as ‘that’ woman, if I only had what SHE has i would be happy. I am 28 and have grown tremendously in the last 5 years. That voice still tries to creep in but God has molded me into a lady who knows my heart and my motives. And I feel good about those things.
Negative self talk can really affect not only the way you see yourself but it also affects the way you come across to others; negative self talk lowers your confidence. We are on week 2 of your Unglued Bible study at the church I attend and this week we are learning to take those negative labels we give ourselves and replace them with God’s identity for us…i.e. I am the work of God, and I am “All Together Beautiful”!
I find the inner stuff has to be tackled by God’s Word! If I am not armed with His Word, I’m wracked with thoughts of guilt and failure about every aspect of my life. I am learning that god really can change my thoughts!!
I am very thankful to have received an invite to this webcast. This topic is something that has been on my mind ALOT lately. I am a person with the disease of addiction, and this is something that I am currently working through and overcoming through Christ daily. While I have stopped the habit, I have thought through some of the things that cause certain addictive behaviors. Negative self talk is certainly one of them. This is a hard one to overcome, but I know all things are possible through HIM.
I am very excited and looking forward to this webcast!
Tara Lightsey
We our humans and inside chatter sure does hurt us girls, woman. I am a people pleaser so I hate neg talk about myself and not being invited to go along. One thing I keep telling myself over and over is with GOD I am always wanted and invited and in his circle for eternity. That means more to me than what others are doing or saying. It is their choice to say and do what they want and my choice of how to take it or react to it. Satan will play with our thoughts and reactions. I am waiting for the enternal party in heaven.
A year ago i took on the new roll of being a stay at home mom. I knew for several months that this was what God was asking of me, for this time of my life. This was a struggle for me, because I am a doer. Doing kept me from being consumed with all the inner chatter. He was asking me to be still. Be still and know Him. Over this past year, He has shown Himself to me in so many ways and I have experienced a closeness with Him that I did not know was possible. Over this past month, He used your book Made to Crave and the 21 Day Challenge devo to help me understand that my worth is not in what I do or what others think of me; that I am made for so much more than vicious cycles, addictions, and poor thought patterns. Getting to know Him and understanding His love and desires for me, has been so freeing! I am excited to hear to webcast! Thank you for being so open and honest!
This entry made me think of Psalm 3:3. “But you are a shield around me, O LORD; you bestow glory on me and lift up my head.”
Unfortunately inside chatter does not dwindle with the completion of puberty, High School etc. But now that I am a mother, I want to teach my children, especially my daughter, to put her self-worth in the Lord and realize how special she is. God made us who we are and loves us just how we are.
I’ve often felt excluded from events or groups or friends… in junior high & high school it felt defining, now not so much. I have a 13 yr old brother who is now battling the same things I did. I hope to give him insight so he doesn’t let these things affect him as long as it did me.
Remembering that I am a child of God — that no matter what others may say, I am still a beautiful daughter of God. That is who I REALLY am … not what other people say I am.
Sometimes I still fall for the inside chatter. I am a middle age woman who still wonders when someone whispers into someone else’s ear, “what are they saying about me now?” The God reminds me that it isn’t about me, rather it’s about Him. If I can just hang on to that truth. For every day that I remember to discipline myself in His truth, I remember more quickly that it is all about the the new woman that Jesus death and resurrection caused in me and the new and wondrous life that God can live through this vessel. God is good!
I sure can relate to this! I too, was never chosen by classmates or for special things. Coming from a small village into a town for school, the clicks were already formed. I kept trying, but finally gave up. Never thought I was even worthy to live and just wanted to die. But Jesus came into my heart and soul and then I knew that He loved me for who I was, for what I was, just an ordinary, not so pretty, not talented young lady and that’s all that mattered to me. For me, at age 65, the constant, keeps me going, full of love bible verse is “Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed, says the Lord, who has compassion on you” Isaiah 54:10
I’ve learned that I am my own biggest enemy. The devil isn’t my enemy it’s the struggle in my own head that’s the bigger threat. The mind is a tricky place to be trapped. And the problem arises in greater force because once you think are alone or unworthy of time and attention from friends that’s when the enemy steps in to do his work…
Hi Lysa! What I learned throughout my life about inside chatter is that it could be so very damaging. For many years, the negative inside chatter I experienced really took control of me; I was alone and I didn’t want to be. I opened up God’s Word and found out who I am in God and that negative inside chatter started to change. While I still go through my moments of negative inside chatter I now know the One who defines me and chases the inside chatter away. I also want to send you a heartfelt thanks for the words of encouragement you and the women of Proverbs 31 write everyday. It has been such a blessing in my life!
God has shown me that he values each of us very much. Realizing that everyone has “inside chatter” makes me more compassionate for others. It helps me to reach out to others when I don’t feel like it.
Oh how I can relate to this so much! Feeling left out and not wanted by women who I’ve thought were my friends has been a constant struggle for me. But my identity truly is in Christ and how He sees me not how I often perceive the way others see me (or don’t seem to see me at all). Thank you for sharing this!
Inside chatter to me is rarely negative, I channel my inside chatter to listening to the spirit telling me I need to pay attention to someone, send a note to someone I have not seen in awhile, or call someone who is a dear friend but needs to hear my voice at that moment. I do my best to not allow the deceiving one to enter my head and keep only good thoughts flowing in and out.
I am working through this right now; my ‘inside chatter’ is eating me up on the inside. I have always struggled with low self-esteem; but it got worse after I quit my last job. With my kids now in school, I am home all by myself all day…and I am LONELY. And the only voice I seem to hear most days is the one telling me how worthless I am.
I find that inside chatter is influenced by weaknesses I have. I fear not being heard or accepted, or loved. Therefore, it has caused my thoughts to criticize and try to prove I am right. I have realized that a lot of my inside chatter at those moments are not guided by the Holy Spirit, they are guided by the Evil one. Over the years God has taught me to let Him guide my thoughts, but it certainly has been a battle because of the habits I have allowed to take place. The negative chatter created a root system that is not easy to dig out. But by the grace of Jesus Christ, I have experienced negative roots being yanked out and destroyed. Because of Him, the inside chatter has deminished significantly over the years and He has taught me how to recognize the attacks and call on Him for redirection.
Something very similar happened to my son when he was in second grade. We made it a learning situation for him. I wish i could do that for myself. I have always felt like I would not be included in things even as an adult. I always worry about fitting in when I’m included. One thing I have learned is I don’t leave anyone out. I am very sensitive about that. 😉
I am constantly battling with negative inner chatter and can’t wait to watch the webcast. As I laid awake the other night trying to stop my mind from going places I didn’t want it to, I was reminded that there is power in the name of Jesus. So, I whispered His name a few times and thankfully was able to fall back asleep.
I am a daughter of the living King and He loves me just as I am – but yet wants me to be more like Jesus and will be my strength when I am weak. I long to find my contentment in that and can’t wait to get some tips tomorrow night.
I have learned that when I start the inside chatter I need to stop and remember I am His!
Learned so much about “Inside chatter “
I think we all deal with “Inside Chatter”, after all we are only human. The trick is to realize when I’m doing it so I can stop it!
My “Inside Chatter” has been in overdrive the last 6 weeks. There are things going on at school that combine my greatest fear and lots of negative “Inside Chatter”. I have done a lot of praying. I was given the book “Jesus Calling” and I bought the Unglued Devotional. The words of wisdom from the both have been spot on each day. I am trying to replace the negative thoughts with scripture as well.
“Inside Chatter” is something I allow in my life more often than never. But I have realized that when I allow it in, I am just giving Satan a foothold. I then have/desire to tune into God and tune Satan out. To God be the glory 🙂
This is such a big issue, especially with Facebook. People can feel left out and then dwell on “inside chatter” and so easy to do, because I am guilty of it! I had a great conversation with friends on this topic recently. Instead of thinking the worst, be happy for or thankful that a friend got to do something fun etc. It is such a great reminder to be careful with our words and actions as well. Thank you.
It’s amazing how quickly the negative chatter inside my head can bring me down. It’s a constant struggle. I always end up reverting back to that outcast made fun of child I once was. Inside my head that is. Though one thing I’ve learned from all of this is that I am a worthy God loving person. I try to be a good person and help others. And as strange as it is, a part of me thinks it’s because of the Inside chatter. I can recall all these hurt outcast feelings therefore I try my best to not let anyone walk away feeling from me how I’ve walked away feeling from others. I’ve also learned the “chatter” doesn’t necessarily “define me” but it has made me become a more compasionate person.
I would love to win this package – I am always struggling with inner chat – I am still fighting cancer, getting ready for another round of chemo, while going through a divorce. My spouse couldn’t handle my cancer and had an affair while I was in the hospital recovering from radical surgery. I am having a very tough time quieting the voices that tell me I’m not good enough.
Lately I’ve just been telling that “inside chatter” to shut up! God is always faithful to bring His truth to mind, often times through a devotional. I can’t express how important staying in His Word daily is to me, to quiet my negative thoughts.
I have learned to tell that inside chatter “NO!!” and when it doesn’t listen then I pray and if it’s still voicing it’s negativity then Praise music does a great job of drowning it out.
Inside chatter….UGH!!! Could it possibly be that I could control it instead of it controlling me?
I still struggle constantly with negative thoughts about myself.
The other day I posted on a blog about something that I felt God was nudging me to do, and got some SERIOUS negative feedback about my comment. That whole day I was dragging and bummed out. Why? Why did I let others have that kind of power? I stood up for my faith and beliefs but it wasn’t received well, yet I let those comments be what defined me that day…. WHAT A WASTE!
Can’t wait for the webcast! Thanks Lysa for your faith and willingness to be used by God to speak to women where they are! May He bless you immeasurably!
I think my inside chatter hurts more than the words of others. I have pushed away many relationships because of my inside chatter. I really need to work on this.
This was so inspiring! Somedays I really need that reminder to step on the voices in my head saying those things! Thanks
“Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.” I love this! Oftentimes we define ourselves by small, insignificant moments (situations) in our lives forgetting about the bigger picture…the plans that God has for our lives. Our plans are not His, so we should focus on Him instead of the small things that will soon pass.
We have been taking about this in my Made to Crave bible studying we are currently doing at church. So many of us eat to combat negative feelings that come from negative self talk. We basically have decided that we need to remember who we are. We have to keep filling ourselves up with God’s truth! Everyday, all day! I am trying to do this by writing verses that are encouraging on note cards & carrying them with me in my purse, posting in my kitchen, & even on the dash board of my car. I am also going to be posting on my bathroom mirror reminders of who I am in Christ.
I am still a work in progress! And thank the Lord thats okay! Inside chatter is my biggest weakness. As an adult I have often blamed my “terrible case of inside chatter” on situations just like this. Rather than realizing it was just a moment or small situation I allowed it to consume me. Unfortunately my inside chatter only grew worse as time went on. My inside chatter led to self-loathing and self destructive behavior. To this day I struggle in my relationships with others. It has been a long road but after years of allowing those thoughts by the grace of God I was able to slowly walk away from that life. Today I am still a working toward overcoming those destructive thoughts but God is good. I am looking forward to the webinar!
Every day I hear the chatter in my mind.
I look at all the different groups gathered laughing and joking as I look in from the outside.
Do we ever change from our younger years? I feel like I have not as I have been hearing the same chatter my whole life. Not feeling comfortable and alone.
I have inside chatter, It’s mean, sometimes ugly and I don’t like it one bit. For me, I combat the DECEPTION with TRUTH. John 17:17 Make them holy by your truth; teach them your Word, which is truth.
If I’m reading in the word and focusing on God, where I Should be, the chatter is replaced by truth, and shut down! This takes faith, discipline and obedience!
For a very long time in my younger years, I struggled with inside chatter, I had very low self esteem, and the minute anyone would make a comment I would take it so personal. This was until I looked to God for confidence, I asked him to fill my heart with love and to remind me who I was in him.
He has transformed me, and to tell you the truth it’s very hard to take things personal nowadays. I always feel bad for the person making the comment, because it’s not about me, something crazy must be going on in their life.
I have learned to test the “inside chatter” against the truths of God’s word. Just because I think it or feel it, doesn’t make it true. Replacing the negative chatter with His truth really helps pull me out if the pit I can sometimes dig myself into. Thanks for your words today!
Negative inside chatter has always been a struggle for me. But I have learned that filling my mind and heart with whatsoever things are pure and lovely helps keep the negative out. It is a constant battle though.
I have never listened because I had never heard of it. Now I will, since I know about it 🙂
This is so me. Will def be tuning in tomorrow!!!
It is a shame that as adults women still struggle with this “inside chatter”. God definitely brought me to this blog and is encouraging me to listen to the web cast. As an almost 30 year old I have been struggling with wanting to be liked so badly by a friend. I get upset when I am not included in her circle, or am not a chosen one for her to want to share things with. That’s when the negative chatter starts. I begin to feel like I am not good enough, or I did something to make her mad. And my mind is on a downward spiral and it’s hard to recover. Thank you so much for this post because it really put things into perspective for me. My identity is in Christ, and no one or nothing else. I can’t wait to hear the webcast!
The chatter inside our heads is draining, exhausting, and downright aggravating. The enemy uses our minds to distract us, to depress us, and to hold us back from God intended. I have begun posting Bible verses in my bathroom and have biblically based perpetual calendars all over the place to remind me to listen to Him…not the world and not my own chatter inside my head.
I do really well not listening to the inside chatter that others may create. I do not like drama or getting involved in drama so I do stay away from those who cause it. My problem is the chatter that is inside my head. I am hard on myself and I have to watch how I talk to myself. I am my worst critic and I have to pray about having positive thoughts.
Have just finished reading your Unglued book and loved it! Such a reminder of that “inside chatter.”
I have learned that even though inside chatter will come, it is up to me to accept that I can not compare myself to others or their situations. God made me to be ME. No matter what others think of me or say about me, I have to keep reminding myself that each person’s truth is their personal reality and has nothing to do with who I am. I’ve struggled for many years letting what others say affect how I feel about and look at myself. But I say no more of that. God is good!
My inside chatter voice can be…and has been incredibly loud. I’ve joked that it is entirely possible to be able to convince me that I am responsible for Eve eating the apple. And sometimes that is not a joke. I am beginning to understand when I try to take on problems and guilt that I am being more than a little self centered. I lose track of the reality that my thoughts should be focused on God and not on my self. I wish it weren’t such a continuing battle to give up these lies….but oh my word the roots are deeper than dandelions. I know God can heal this….I need to get out of the way.
My pastor once preached a sermon about internal chatter. She referred to it as the tendency to “nurse it and rehearse it”. It’s so easy to get caught up in believing that conflicts with others or problems define us. Over the years I’ve discovered that I must apply the truth of God’s word, i.e. Col. 3:12&13 & 2 Cor. 10:4&5 in order to break the vicious cycle of “nursing and rehearsing”. I am a dearly loved child of God. My struggle is not against flesh and blood. I must choose to put on godly attributes by loving and forgiving others and taking captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. With my eyes on Jesus I can more clearly see that my identity is found in being His child. I can look to the future with hope because He will be with me no matter what I face. His grace and strength gives me the courage needed to persevere.
i love the lessons on inside chatter…i was always insecure in high school so i ran around with the bully girls…ironically they r my best friends now…we grew up but some dont..dealing with it as an adult i think is worse then being a kid…but as long as God is whispering in your ear that he loves u and will never leave u…WE CAN KNOW THAT WE WILL BE OK!!!!!!!
Hi Lysa and Shelia,
Well I can tell you that my inside chatter won’t leave me alone, and it has been going on a long time, 3 years to be exact. Yes, I have negative self talk at times, but this incident that i am going to tell you about started an ongoing inside chatter that did not quit, in fact I still have it!
Three years I was suddenly ill and did no know what was wrong. I was a middle school teacher, had just finished getting my masters degree. I am married and have 2 daughters, 23 and 21. During this time I knew I felt off, that I was not myself. I went to my doctor, and told her that my right foot felt funny, bigger than it should be, I couldn’t get my clog back on at work after I had kicked them off during my planning time. My doctor looked at me and said that my foot was not swollen, I said it was, she looked at me like I was crazy. Inside my head, I thought that she didn’t believe me. I felt as if she was treating me like I had bothered her with this stupid complaint. This set off a 3 year qwest for what was wrong. I ended up seeing 10 different doctors, who all but one, said there is nothing wrong with me. I couldn’t get out of bed, I couldn’t climb our stairs, I couldn’t go to work, I was pretty much bed bound, and the whole time my mind was shouting at me, ” they think your lying, they don’t believe you, get up and get back to work, your lazy, your being over dramatic, stop being so sensitive!” This inside chatter left me in tears. I became depressed, I stopped interactng with my friends and family. I starting questioning my own symptoms, ” is this all in my head? Am I making this up? maybe nothing is wrong with me?” I attempted to go back to work, I lasted 6 days, on day 7, I could no longer get out of bed again. My family felt helpless as they watched me deteriorate. I had times when I felt I had more energy, but always ended up back in bed. I received different diagnosises over the three years. Depression, chronic fatigue syndrome, multiple sclerosis, fibromyalgia, lupus, and anxiety. I finally decide to switch doctors, and my new family practice doctor sent me to a new neurologist who found a nerve problem in my leg, which led to a neurosurgeon who diagnosed me with scoliosis, stenosis and severe arthritis in my back. Forward now till today, I will be seeing my surgeon next month to set a date of back surgery. they will do a fusion and the i-4 and i-5, a laminectomy and rods to straighten the scolisos part. this is great news to me, but I still have that chatter, ” maybe they will find that you don’t have a back probem, they are going to tell you there really is nothing wrong with you, you should pull yourself up by your bootstraps and get on with life, stop being to negative, everyone has bad days, eveyone has pain from time to time, etc.” I know this chatter so well, that it has become my reality, my mind just won’t stop. It has worn me out to the point of feeling beat, it finally has won the fight.(scary when I anwser the chatter back with my out loud voice 🙂 ). but you know, way deep down is that little spark that is still dimly lit. during these difficult times, I pull out my devotions and concentrate on what God is trying to show me, why he needs me to accept this situation, because yes, it is going to get better, and yes, I will pull through.
Just so you know I depend on writers like you, so that I can search for a sentence or a paragraph that is just going to speak to me, that it seems like you wrote it just for me. That’s when I feel comforted, when I find that someone else feels like I do at times. Thanks Lisa and Shelia your words of encouragment and your kind hearts,
Fondly,
Karen Sebben
I am reading unglued right now, and I can relate to everything! You have given me hope! I can change and become…”unglued”!
Philipians 4:8….that is how I combat the negative inside chatter!!!!
I wish this is something I could say I have whipped, but alas, I’m human. Sometimes the inner chatter is so hard to turn off. Many times I’ve had to make the consious choice to say no, it’s not true, and I’m not going to believe the lie (basically crying out for God’s help). I like how a friend put it once. What do you want in your cup/glass? (i.e. garbage in, garbage out; or good stuff in, good stuff out?
What I have learned about negative inside chatter? I’ve learned that they’re lies – and lies that I must battle daily and with God’s grace, I will win!
One of my favorite verses is, Romans 8:16, where God tells us that the Spirit Himself testifies together with our spirit that we are God’s Children. I have relied on that verse when I feel less than loved, not part of a group, or just plain ignored. I rely on the Spirit’s voice to testify to me and to God that I am part of God’s Family and cherished!!!
You would think as an adult this internal chatter would be under control but I seem to deal with it all the time. I have to pray constantly to trust God more and ask for forgiveness for the times I don’t put my trust in Him alone. The part that bothers me the most is when I see so many women that deal with this too. I pray that we can encourage each other to overcome this battle and know that God will never leave us out!
I’ve struggled with that inside chatter since I was very young. I am just learning who I am in Christ and applying that. When I hear things in my head that tell me I blew it, I’m nothing, I have no value, I say out loud, “I am a child of God, I am a co-hear with Christ, I am redeemed, chosen, blessed, accepted, forgiven”. If He is for me who can be against me. No weapon formed against me shall stand. He LOVES me. It is the enemy attacking me with that stuff because he wants to draw me away from God and I’ve found that being in the Word, renewing my mind with these kinds of thoughts and listening to praise and worship, has been very effective in casting down those negative thoughts. Still struggling, still learning, but definitely getting better.
I have always tried to fit in or at least feel like I can. But the inside chatter continues…did I say the right thing, did I hurt their feeling when I did not mean too, why don’t they call me to join them…. It goes on and on. All the junk that in life.
God is working on my heart and my head every day.
This so bring backs memories. Still to this day I fill like this. I have a hard time with talking to people I do not know or making new friends. Every one wants to fill like they belong some where. I have started a Mary Kay Career and love it. I have made great girl friends with lasting friendships. I can call any of them and they would be there for me. This helps me with getting out there and letting the negative people go. My life is the way I want it right now. Great times with great memories. I did start your book Unglued with a Bible study and it has helped me lots. Thank you for your encouragement and using your own personal life is your studies. I can connect with you. God bless you Lysa and I will listen to the webcast. 🙂
Wow! Negative inside chatter has been a problem for me pretty much all my life. I so needed to hear this message today. I am on a path to healing and discovering my value. Just a great confirmation that I am headed in the right direction! Thank you Lysa!!!
I have dealt with negative inside chatter my entire life on being included. I remind myself that Christ chose ME and this short moment of being left out will pass quickly, but I am on Christ’s list forever and will not be left behind.
Oh- dear, some days the inner chatter gets the best of me. It’s time it clear my head.
I make a conscious effort to set my heart and mind on things above and not on earthly things and not on the “inside chatter” that so easily creeps in!
WOW! This hit right at home! My negative inside chatter began when as a child, my dad would not show up when he said he would. I would sit by the window and get excited every time I heard a car coming. When it passed by, my negative inside chatter would start telling me that he must not love me, I wasn’t his top priority, I must be a bad girl for him not to love me, etc…
This continued as I grew up. No one wanted me at their parties except the bad kids, so I fell in with a bad crowd. It never occurred to me that maybe my negativity pushed people away.
This inside chatter has followed me my entire life. Sometimes I believe it, sometimes I have been able to push it away. I have known for quite some time that the enemy is the voice of my inside chatter, stealing away my joy when I believe him.
Your blog post really hit a chord with me. I have the fullness of Christ in me! I can find my identity in Him, not from those around me! I’m excited and can’t wait to hear the webcast!!!! Thank you for being His clear voice in this crazy, loud, noisy world!
Unglued impacted me deeply, starting a book study at church on it this week! “I can face things out of my control and not act out of control.”
Oh boy….inside chatter has been a HUGE challenge for me, my whole life. Some of the things I have learned is that it gets louder and more intense when I am tired and/or stressed. Which has been a good thing to learn as it helps me quiet those voices when I recognize sleep deprivation or stressful circumstances. I’ve also learned that the quicker I put a stop to the chatter, the better off I am. It’s been far too easy for me to listen and chime in and agree with those voices in the past which just led to poor self-image and depression. It’s a slippery slope to keep feeding and rehearsing all the untruths and half truths that can pop in my head. Sometimes, I even have to speak the truth out loud to quiet that nasty inner voice! I had posted on my FB page about being under the weather this past week: I had gotten up to get another cup of Sprite….to help flush the “yuck” out of my body…and the Holy Spirit whispered to me that is exactly what happens when we “drink” the water of the Word…it flushes out all the “yuck” in our souls (and disarms the chatter!). 🙂
I think the one thing I’ve learned about inside chatter is that even if you achieve one victory and stomp it down, you have to realize it intends to come back. I need to stay prepared and vigilant so the next time it’s there I can again push it away. It’s hard to stay busy in our daily lives and stay in the word and keep watch to guard against it, but I’ve also learned the more I focus on Christ’s word the more he watches for me and helps to defend my mind against it. He did say come all who are weary and he will give you rest. I truly believe that’s what the rest looks like! Stay in him and he helps to keep us defended and protected, but we have to stay focused on him.
Inside chatters can make you feel terrible sometimes. Reading this blog entry brought me back to my childhood, being that one who didn’t get picked by the team captain I wanted to or even getting picked last. Those inside chatters can make you feel very insignificant but are truly so small compared to what we have in Christ which is much much more significant than anything those inside feelings make you feel. I want to thank you for this entry today reminding me that God cares so much more about me than anyone else and especially those inside chatters.
I struggle with this all the time! I suffer from an autoimmune disease that is often know as the “invisible” disease because all the symptoms can’t be seen (they are covered). So I’m always wondering about what people think about me. “She isn’t sick,” “There isn’t anything wrong with her,” are the thoughts that constantly go through my head! Since I have turned it all over to the Lord it has gotten a lot better but I still struggle and lots of days just stay at home to avoid it.
I struggled with this some as a teen but I have dealt with it more through the eyes of my teenage daughter. I have been there during her heartache of not being invited or being left out of activities. It made me so upset how it affected her. I spent nights listening to her cry and reassuring her that it was not about her. I told her what God says about her and how wonderfully made she is. Finally she realized some if those people were not friends at all and it was their issues not hers.
I have learned that my inside chatter gets so much better when I listen to KLOVE, and when I am aware of it, I know when I am doing it, so I have to tell myself STOP IT! And I will pray and ask Him to help control my thoughts and emotions. =)
As I get older, I get a little better about turning off the negative chatter. I’ve learned who I am in Christ and I know He would never speak or think the things of me that I sometimes think and say of myself. I wish I would have understood this when I was younger, but hey, better late than never, right.
I would say that “negative inside chatter” ruled a large part of my life….as a child and as a young Mom. I know I can say that it still haunts me from time to time, but I have a great husband and a few friends who have helped me see the beauty of MY life over and over. I think this webcast would be another step in the right direction….and to win this gift would just be icing on the cake! 🙂 Blessings~
Dont put your whole identity in the smallness of the situation. ..very powerful. Its much to think about.
It is refreshing to know I am not alone in this. My inside chatter shows up to remind me that I am alone, no one misses me, no one pursues a friendship with me. Now, these are not true statements, but they happen. I am thankful for God’s truth that I can replace these lies with. I am worth dying for!
I’ve really been trying to combat negative thoughts for the past two years. It has helped my marriage SO much! I am not creating a diatribe in my head about how I think my husband will react to a situation allowing me not to come up with a defense for his “future” reaction.
I have come to realize that “inside chatter” can be helpful or harmful. You can let hurtful things that people say to you fester inside and make you react in ways that you never imagined or you can let the hurtul things people say roll of your back. It doesn’t matter what others say or think of you. You are a child of GOD! That’s all that should matter 🙂
What I’ve learned about inside chatter–hmmm. I guess I’ve learned to just deal with it. If I have negativity going on internally, I’ve found it’s simply too hard to pull myself up by the bootstraps and change course. Sometimes it’s just about getting involved in something else to get my mind away from the negativity.
When I start my day with prayer and meditation, readings, and asking God to direct my thinking from self seeking and selfish ways, ask God through the day for an intuitive thought or action when faced with a problem. My day seems to run seemingly smooth, the chatter is lessened but if it occurs i usually consider if it lines up with who i am, speak to another spirutual frkend who can tell me the truth and it usually disappears x
We all have times when we feel left behind, not included, unloved, what we must remember is our Father in Heaven loves us just as HE created us and Jesus is the same yesterday, today and forever….
Hi! I tried to leave a comment earlier today and was not sure if it went through due to some kind of computer trouble so here I am again.
I have learned that I really need to listen to my “inside chatter” and to determine if it’s coming from negative,untrue,or dramatic places or if it’s from the truth found in God’s word. God’s word always helps me to get my “inside chatter ” set right!
Thanks for reminding me that me identity is not found in others. Not in what they think of me or say about me. But my identity is found in my Savior Jesus Christ!
The chatter is endless like a nagging voice most of which has come from my past, growing up I told i wasnt wanted, so had alot of self worth issues, which is still struggle with, but Gods word is life to me, and Jesus brings his still small voice, just like he calmed the storms in the bible, he calms the storms in my life, because I allow him to take the reigns.
I can so relate to your story shared in this blog. I am 39 but can vividly recall mean things kids said to me about my weight in 8th grade. As an adult, I still fight negative inner chatter which evolved during those days. I have learned, though, that clinging to God and holding people closely helps. I’ve just recently heard about you and “Unglued” so I look forward to reading it and using it to re-create the inner chatter that can be so damaging.
The more I stay in God’s word, memorizing and meditating on scripture, the less “inside chatter” I have. Not by my strength but by the power of The Lord! Had to learn this the hard way of course, but thank God, He never gives up on us!
I have learned that I can not let this “chatter” drive my emotions on a daily basis. Doesn’t mean that the chatter is not there it just can not control my every feeling throughout the day. You learn to lean on your faith a lot & prayer helps guide you through the chatter that can bring you down. Always trust in the Lord & he will carry you through.
I have learned that I have to watch inside chatter. Sometimes that is hard, but is getting easier the more I pray and study God’s Word. Your book is great.
Those negative thoughts seem to hit when a person is worn down… just when you DON’T need them. It’s good to remember that we are worthy because of Christ, who suffered and died and rose to make us God’s own dear children!
I’ve always been the girl like others that wasn’t invited to other girls (at my church), who I thought were my friends parties, homes and it made me feel like I was never good enough for them, making me have negative thoughts about myself. Still feel that way sometimes to this day, but then I remember that I have God, my hubby and 2 precious children on my side and that’s all I need!!!!
As a preacher’s kid, I was always told “remember who you are.” Well, I did…I was the “black sheep!” The one with, not one, but TWO, illegitimate children! I spent a LOT of years beating myself up over the labels and failure I carried around with me, until one day I realized — ENOUGH!
God loves me and forgives me. I’m a good mother, and He is with me everyday! He doesn’t care about where I’ve been, but where I’m going…and I’m going with Jesus!
I am the queen of inside chatter. I try to cling to the words from Philippians 4:8, Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.
“Inside Chatter” is everpresent! And…it’s not usually positive things that it’s chatting about. Thank goodness that God is EVERPRESENT too and a much bigger and more powerful voice that I must listen to in order to combat my negative “inside chatter”. My God is greater. I must see myself in His eyes!
Well, my tears that are flowing pretty much mean I am “unglued” and trying to find the river….sitting home alone. Thank you for your books and posts. I need to read your books and get back His strength in my life.
Inside chatter is something I have struggled with most of my life. Your post made me sit back and ponder how many hours of my life I have given to these thoughts. The amount of precious time that has been wasted worrying about inconsequential moments is upsetting. Maybe now that I am aware of this I can catch myself when I start to travel down that path instead of contemplating how I could have changed the past, which can’t be done at any rate. Live for the now and don’t spend so much time worrying as it will not add one day to your life. It will only take away.
I’ve struggled for many years with negative inside chatter. By Gods grace and a year and a half of biblical counseling my identity is rooted in Christ and as long as I can keep this in mind, I can have victory over this. Gods promises never fail! !
The inside chatter in my life, because of recent circumstances, has left me ripped apart and feeling so alone. But God has a plan, and it’s his absolute best for me! I can’t let these moments, this inside chatter, be footholds for Satan to weed his way in. God can protect me from and come to my aid in this battle! God is using His “princess band-aids” to mend up those rips and tares and heal my heart. 🙂 I’m learning to trust Him more, and ignore that inside chatter! To God be the glory!
Inside chatter is a double edged sword…sometimes it can destroy you and sometimes it can lift you high! the trick is listening and praying about what inside chatter to act on and what inside chatter is just the devil trying to get to you. Women In Fatih!!!
Its funny how for me as I have gotten older, I have had a harder time dealing with inside chatter. I went through a bad marriage that left me feeling like I wasnt enough.I am married to ao wonderful man now but I sometimes still struggle with the thought am I enough of a wife, mother, friend. I just recently joined a womens small group and it is intimidating to join a group of women and be the new girl. Its scary to open yourself up to people and then have the inside chatter going on in your head. I am a work in progress and I know the more I pray and give it to God the better it will be!
I need to notice my chatter and correct it when it is wrong. I also am learning to listen to my kids negative chatter and replace it with the truth.
You are an absolute inspiration. The enemy will always find any excuse to niggle away at our faith in ourselves and especially our faith in God. Our God is stronger than anything. I have been finding that once I realize I’m second guessing things or beating myself up about past failures I stop and just start to pray. God’s got my back every time!
The inside chatter is absolutely my undoing & the devil at work on me! It has gotten a little better with age, but now that I have an almost 16 year old daughter, she is struggling with the same issues I had & never resolved. Now, we’re both working together to turn it off or at least down. Lysa, 4 weeks ago, our ladies bible study group started “Becoming More Than A Good Bible Study Girl”. What amazing insight I’ve learned from you! I appreciate your reading of the bible & how it pertains to our lives now. Thank you for all you’re doing to help women become all God wants us to be! God Bless!
I have realized over time that the chatter is not of God, however sometimes I still let it creep into my life! When i recognize it I try to remind myself of God’s truths and not the negatives and lies!
This story was ME… in 6th grade I moved from one town to another. We went to the grocery store for the first time (with my little brother) and were in line when in the line next to us was a group of all of the girls from my new class – buying groceries for a HOUSEBOAT slumber birthday party!!! I wasn’t as left out because I didn’t know them yet – but boy was I sad. Fortunately, that didn’t get in the way of my friendship with the birthday girl (which developed over the next year) and we are still best friends 31 years later!!! Saw her last weekend when my husband and I took a trip near her home and got to take her and her husband to dinner and sleepover!
Gosh…lately that’s all I’ve had is negative inner chatter about a handful of people who’ve had a shift, a change, a different direction and have left me trying to hold up my bootstraps wondering why I haven’t been chosen. When the negativity starts up, I start praying and asking God to refocus my thoughts and energy on Him. And when it all boils down it is a small situation, but Satan knows that’s where I’m weak and attacks me there. I keep praying and praying and praying. Today’s blog is so relevant because I cannot “put my whole identity into the smallness of this situation.”
I have always struggled with “negative self-talk” but I know now that I can take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ. I don’t always do this soon enough…but praise God I am not where I once was!
I would really love those!!!
“Inside chatter” is one of satan’s tools to tear us down and make us feel unworthy. As a Christian, I know that God made me in His image and His love for me will help me overcome the negative “inside chatter”. Daily Bible reading encourages me and supplies the self confidence needed to ignore ‘inside chatter”.
Listen to God and not “our” inside chatter
My inside chatter is probably 85% negative. Made to Crave has helped me SO much to do “breath” prayers and give the negativity over to God AND to have scripture to counter it with. THANK YOU so much for all you do.
When I fall guilty to that inside chatter- I pray . I know I’m worth more than that to myself and to God…. Then I make myself some hot tea and smile.
I feel like it is Satan whispering in my ear telling me I’m not good enough, etc. It gets in my head and distracts me from my tasks and purpose. It clouds my perspective and gunks up my day, week, month, etc. It also makes me on edge in those areas and ultra sensitive. It is really yucky stuff. I love hearing Gods word and promises in my head instead!!!
I need to identify the truth about what God says about me and the truth about who God is to combat my false negative inside chatter.
I feel like I deal with this a lot especially being in business. I find myself always talking to my self like this and over the years I have had to learn to pray about it. During the winter months I suffer from the doom and gloom and I easily can slip into a down myself coma but then I remember that is the devil trying to crush my spirit. Thanks for always speaking to my heart. I hardly ever read blogs or books of ppl only when they speak to me and you always seem to know exactly what to say. God Bless
I have struggled I with this for most of my life. Now I have a verse I can turn to for comfort. thank you ! “For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, AND YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST,” (Colossians 2: 9-10).
I’m learning to change the lies for the truth of God’s Word. But to do that I have to learn to immediately take the thought captive and to be reading the Word to know what the truth is!
Blessings,
My inside chatter is usually about being good enough! Am I a good enough mom/wife. Sometimes I even question God about why he allowed me to be a Mom.
So sorry I will not be able to listen to the webcast, I will be working.
Kim S.
My inside chatter can get pretty loud sometimes, but I counteract it with God-thoughts. I try to focus on promises found in Scripture. On my worst days, God quiets my mind and calms my heart so that I can hear the truth.
What I have learned about inner chatter is that when in that moment it’s important to just stop all thoughts and go to God. Sometimes we want to run to another person to vent and have them agree with us but if we go to God instead he replies immediately, and gives us the answer that we need not just what we want to hear:)
I’ve learned that most of the negative inside chatter results more from my insecurities and is more present when I have allowed myself to be influenced by negative people and have slipped from my spiritual path . When I stay on that path, and surround myself with the right people and most of all, when I am right with God, the negative chatter seems to silence itself and is replaced with strength and love of self as well as my feeling secure in who I am what I am doing.
50…what a year. I am not where I thought I would be. God is still good. I am blessed with His love and the Love of my husband. My Dad died my nest emptied and my church family of 21years prays for me but I have 0 personal relatonsips (lots of rejection) Yes,,,,I hear the Negitive chatter. I so want to rest in who Christ has made me to be, listen to His voice, move where He wants me to be. This now place is hard to see past.
I so needed to hear the message about “freaking out” I have had many of those days since my injury and surgery this week! Thank u for sharing and I can not wait to order the book so I can really learn how to b unglued!:)
Wow! Those moments in high school have the power to define us…if we let them. It was during those years when I began to notice and see the impact of negative people and negative comments and their ability to wreck havoc on what I thought about myself.
I’m in my early forties and still deal with this, but I now realize that it is the enemy of my soul that constantly tries to belittle and undermine my belief in myself and in Christ by causing me to get wrapped up in the small things. I’m learning now to turn of the voice by stating life affirming statements to myself and by replacing the “lies of life” with the truth of God’s word.
So Blessed by your blog today 🙂
“It was a moment. And moments shift. People are fickle. People shift.” This was my favorite line from your blogpost today. I’m new here and more than a little curious about “Unglued.” 😉
Internal chatter…hmm…I wasn’t born particularly un-confident…but not overly so, either. I was always pretty moderate and pretty content. I knew I wasn’t perfect, but I was a glass-half-full person and for the Most part didn’t let others’ opinions bothered me…although, a new school for high school was a little tough for a while, since I was entering a rather cliquish class. My big chatter problem has been more recent. I’ve made choices with my husband about how we would raise a family. We’re both on the same page. Others are Not, at times…even those close to us respond negatively about some things we choose to do…teach traditional morals/values, homeschool, give them an early bedtime, certain discipline methods (i.e.: a serious talking-to and sitting on hand for blatant disobedience…not anything drastic, here). It has REALLY thrown me for a loop to have so many people be in-you-face about how “wrong” you are to do things a certain way…when it’s honestly none of their beeswax. I realize these are just differences of opinions, but some people act as if you don’t love them or can’t be their friend unless you do everything exactly the way they do. It’s been really hard to find the balance of doing what I know is right for my family and not getting upset when people pick it apart…
My “inside chatter” does not define me or the person God is molding me to be. I will never be perfect and have to learn to let things go. Focus on the reality of the situation and not dwell on what it is not, or what it could have been. I may not be there yet,but I am closer than I was yesterday!
I learned that I don’t always have to give into the inside chatter.
I think 6th grade was the first time I ever heard the inside chatter. I never knew I “wasn’t good enough” according to others’ standards until one day a girl made fun of me for how I looked. Since then I have battled with the chatter and low self-esteem. But, I’ve been learing through God’s word that I am loved and cherished. I am beautifully and wonderfully made, and that’s all that should matter.
I have learned that the inside chatter is mostly the enemy lying to me. As the Holy Spirit shows me the lies, I’ve been able to defeat some of them. The biggest problem is not realizing that I’ve been listening to a lie, because you know, he always puts just a little truth in it, to make it believable. I’m reading “Unglued” right now and know this year is a year of “healing” for me. Can’t wait to see how God frees me more!
My inside chatter is usually in regards to how I’ve lost my cool and messed up. I put so much of my value on how I “appear” (at least in my own mind) to be parenting – which many days – isn’t a great, that if I lose my cool and blow up at my kids, I have chatter in my head reminding me of how bad of a mom I am and how I’m messing them up for life. (I started the Unglued study this morning) and I’m confident that I can learn how to stay glued. 🙂 So what I’m taking away about Inside Chatter, is that those unglued mom moments are just small moments, they don’t have to define who I am as a person. One small moment doesn’t define a lifetime. Thank you Lysa.
It is sometimes deafening! !! It is a daily, moment by moment conversation that I have with tbe Lord, sharing the struggle with the inside chatter. HE is the one that helps me weed thru what indeed could be a day of defeat or that of victory. With all the hats I (we) wear as women, knowing we have had successes and defeats, the chatter can be debilitating. I am so excited for this webcast tomorrow, thank you Lysa and Shelia for following Christ with your encouragement to me!
This article could not have come at a better time. I have always dealt with inside chatter. In high school would compare myself to others girls and tried to be like them so I wouldn’t be talked about or made fun of. I always thought people didn’t like me. Just recently it has come back to haunt me when I wanted to have a party with some women at my house and only 4 people wanted to come out of the 50 people I invited. The chatter all came back again and I found myself thinking why don’t people want to spend time with me? What is wrong with me? I even turned to my husband for support and he had to remind me that maybe it was simply because of all the sickness going around and just simply the busyness in people lives. Not because I was unliked. Now that I have a 10 month old daughter I have made a promise to myself to tell her everyday that she is beautiful and that 0i love her and make sure I am a good role model for her so I can stop the chatter with me and pray it doesn’t pass on to her. I know God is in control and with HIM I can do all things
Does anyone remember a record being scratched & it playing the same thing over & over?? I think we all deal with negativity & it is almost like a record playing over & over at different times in our lives. We all come up against it – whether we would like to admit it or not.. I think what matters most is how we deal with it & how we choose to combat the negative inside chatter. I have not heard of this book until today & I am excited to hear all about it & what I can do on a personal level with the help of God to change, combat the negative inside chatter/ guilt feelings. Thank you for this opportunity! 🙂
Jeremiah 29:11 often reminds me that my “inside chatter” is usually wrong. If the chatter is trying to bring me down I am reminded by this verse that God alone knows the plans He has for me…and His plans are good!
I have learned that we do have an enemy who loves to chatter! As women, we are particularly vulnerable to having our emotions rise and fall by listening AND believing the negative accusations. We must recognize that he is a liar and make a conscious effort to turn the channel. Tell ourselves (preferably out loud) who Christ says we are–or in some cases who we are becoming! Remember that Christ told us that Satan comes to steal, kill and destroy. Be on guard! Hit ’em with the Word! Play Christian music. Fill your heart and mind with Truth. Don’t entertain Satan’s ‘arrows’ but rather meditate on the Lord’s opinions of you and thus your shield of faith will prevent them from wounding you.
I have struggled with this even as an adult. It is just recently that I have realized it’s not always about me, that instead of wasting my time thinking about why I wasn’t included and feeling sorry for myself I could be doing something with someone. I have realized there are plenty of others in the same boat and have expanded my circle of friends beyond the “chosen few” which has been wonderful!!
Hey Lysa.. I have struggle with this too especially when I wasn’t save it was bad it would put me down bad but now it like when it come to me I encourage myself yes me myself and I can you believe that?!! Lol and remember God loves me and he has a especially thing for me and I’m separate to do something especial for God. 😉
The negative thoughts can really multiply and stear me wrong. Recently I have intentionally prayed scripture or recite verses of truth to drive out the negativity that only Satan intends to harm me with. So grateful to feel the relief and joy when the Word overcomes me.
Inside chatter for me mostly comes from the lies I believed about myself from childhood trauma/abuse. The Bible and it’s wonderful truths have been setting me free from the lies. Little by little, verse by wounderful verse that becomes alive in my heart and sets me free.
I am trying so hard to “let go and let God”. I suffer from horrible panic and anxiety which is causing so much havoc to my body. I have severe fibromyalgia and stress only worsens it. I own a business and have a teenage daughter so my stress is out of control, which means my fibro and ulcers are out of control. But I decided a few months ago to really learn and study the bible and to live for Him. I am amazed at the peace I feel from Him. I have so much more to learn but I have more trust and hope in Him then I have ever had in my life!
I have to tell my inner chatter to just “shut up” sometimes. I can get so caught up in the petty things…then I’m gently reminded of who I am…His!
I choose not to listen to the voices in my head; only to the One in my heart.
Inside Chatter!!! In my opinion it speaks all to loudly. I too am a recipient of inside chatter. I have come to realize that is by God’s Grace that I am perfect in the way he created me. I am a “favorite” Daughter of the King! He is my hope and it is in his peace that I rest and find myself secure.
I am so thankful for the encouragement I receive through your devotionals. Thank you for sharing.
In HIS Peace,
Melissa
Many years ago I decided to serve God with my very best instead of half-way. From somewhere I picked up a saying which I then posted in every place imaginable. When inside chatter clamored, I would glance at the post and read it out loud: “Satan, I refuse your accusations because my sins have been forgiven.” It is transforming!
I do my best to rebuke the one that “inside chatter” comes from, the lying enemy. But it is hard when the day is long or the circumstances are tough. Positive friends, staying focused on my Lord and Savior, and knowing that He loves me unconditionally helps block the chatter or turn down the volume. We are so blessed not to have to do life alone, but to have great sisters in Christ and a God who is so much bigger than the world we live in!
I have dealt with the negative “inside chatter” most of my life. Once I started spending more time with God and reading His word I was able to fight back the negatives with who God says I am. It helps to know that others go through the same thing.
Inside chatter has been my biggest and most overwhelming struggle in my life right now. I struggle every day with those thoughts about being a failure. It cuts very deep. I am a stay at home mom, with an amazing supportive husband and a sweet little 2 year old daughter. God has brought me through some of the biggest challenges in my life – I was suicidal when I was 19 mostly because I thought I was worthless, and after I had a bad car accident, God spoke to me in a huge way, mostly that He loved me, and He had a big plan for my life. The last 5 years I’ve dealt with some major health problems. I experienced God giving me strength moment by moment, day by day for about a year when I was mostly bed bound. During that time, my husband and I were dating, and I thoroughly believe that God brought him into my life not just to encourage me and love me, but also to help me believe that I was worth it. I was worth loving. I learned what it meant to be loved unconditionally, just like God loves us. We are very happily married! But in the last 3 years, my family has gone thru some major emotional trauma. This last year was a hard one for me. I have had a lot of lies being shoved into my head by satan, and sadly many times I believed them. I believed that I was a failure as a wife, a mom, taking care of the house, being a friend, being a leader in our work from home business…it got so overwhelming that I shut down emotionally. I could barely stand to look at my husband because I felt that in his eyes, that’s how he viewed me. In hindsight, I know that isn’t true. I shut down my heart. I felt deep inside me that I was truly a failure, and I couldn’t do anything to change that. My heart was so heavy. My eyes burned but no tears would come. Until one day, when my husband pulled me aside to share how much he was feeling unloved and unappreciated. I realized quickly where listening to that inside chatter had led me. I cried hard for the first time in months, we asked for forgiveness, and prayed to God, asking for strength to make changes…and healing began- for both of us. It’s not easy accepting that you’ve hurt the one you love deeply. And I wonder- how must God feel when He knows we are listening to this “death-blow” kind of inside chatter? What must He think? I’m sure it must hurt Him immensely and make Him angry to see it happening. So what I’ve been doing to combat this inside chatter is a couple things: listen to uplifting, encouraging Christian music, especially when I’m feeling like those lies are really coming at me. I will often take a minute to read a few verses from the Bible, and pray. And I am making a collection of verses to put around the house so that I can see truth of what God really thinks. I’ve felt this has really helped me in the last 2 months. I still struggle, but God is patient and full of grace, and for that I am truly grateful.
I just finished the Unglued book study with a beautiful group of women. Would love to have an “unmarked” copy to share with another friend…as my inner chatter tells me I couldn’t possibly share my marked up copy with her! 🙂 This was seriously one of the best and yet most uncomfortable studies I have ever done! Talk about facing the inner voices! I am a “stuffer” so I had to work at this! My inner voices from as far back as a little girl who was abused once by an uncle, and a mom who refused believe me, said you aren’t good enough and no one will believe you. Now an adult who loves the Lord, her husband and five children…and yet I still battle it! We recently faced rejection by family due to their decisions apposing our last adoption process. All of these old inner voices that I thought were safely tucked away reared their ugly head!
I let inside chatter make me feel so insecure. I want to replace these thoughts with positive thoughts and speak only the truth. It’s so easy to want to be valued in society, but I have to remember that the only person that I really want to please is God. I’m looking forward to the webcast! God bless.
I had hoped that by now I would have defeated the negative inside chatter. But, alas, at nearly 40 I still struggle with it. I hear how I am not a good enough wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, neighbor, not skinny enough, not organized enough, and on and on. Most of the time I take a breath and remind myself of God’s promises and read important verses such as “I am fearfully and wonderfully made” Psalm 139:14. Sometimes it brings me down for a little while.
I’m looking forward to the study and learning more!
Yep! This would be me, and I’ve battled it all of my life. I am guilty of negative “inside chatter,” and I find it becomes worse when I forget to whom I belong. The drudges of this life seem to pull (pull?! more like YANK) fiercely, and it seems like the least little thing will get my goat…whether it’s self-image issues (which is my biggest battle), fighting children (Lord, help), or even things like renovating my home (OH, BLESS). But still, I am simply amazed how the Lord jumps right in and places in my mind’s path something to make me let go of the funk: Made to Crave 21 Day devotional on You Version (Which I loooooove), amazing “patience that passes all understanding,” and surprising extra hands that just show up to help. He never ceases to amaze me.
This happens to me mostly at night. I either can’t go to sleep or I wake up in the night thinking and talking to myself about so many things I need to do in the morning. Sometimes I just tell myself to stop the worry and just wait until morning to plan and take action.
My inner chatter can fill me with anxiety and cause emotional responses from me when I am caught up in fear and worry. I learned it is best to take a day or two and pray and let the chatter settle. Most of the time it will go away. If it does not then I can have a less emotional response to my situation.
I’ve learned that my inside chatter is not the truth. I’ve learned that when I put too much emphasis on what MIGHT be being said by others I lose sght of truth.
Inside chatter is definitely a daily combat for most of us. None of us have arrived or are immune to the attacks that the enemy so sneakily wedges into the smallest of cracks to penetrate our carefully places walls we think we protect ourselves with. As a pastors wife it takes the smallest of looks or comments to make me feel unprepared, unworthy, out of place, unwanted, etc..
I can’t wait to watch this on Thursday.
Lysa, just started reading “Unglued” and am so excited to present this to, O.A.S.I.S., our ladies group as our next bible study. Loving it!! So impressed with how real and uncovered you are about yourself, mistakes and challenges. Others need to see we’re human and bleed too. 😉 God bless ladies!!
Satan is so… Satan. Lol. He’s always trying to get in my head & tell me negative things about myself. And sadly enough, most of the time, I let him & believe him. I wish I could feel worthy, I know what my Lord & Savior, Jesus Christ, did for me, I just wish I would always feel that I deserve His love & grace. I need to work on accepting that, & not accepting Satans hateful chatter.
I need to pause and hear what my inner voice is telling me and to know it doesn’t always speak truth. I need to replace it with God’s truth about me!!
That I don’t need to listen to the negative inside chatter..I know my god loves and forgives me…I just have to keep being the best person I can be!
Throughout my life, I’ve learned to take life as the adventure God would have me live. Things aren’t always the way I’d like for them to be; whether, money, job, children, whatever; but God is always there for me. I’ve learned to pray and read the Word to guide me daily. Especially if the chatter inside wants to get me down. Thanks for the offer to enter the contest, God Bless!
This is just what I needed to be reminded of today! So many times I go back to who I used to be not who I am in Christ. As a child my father left my mother, sister, and myself for another woman. So many times it seems I forget that I have a Heavenly Father who will never leave me nor forsake me! It is so easy to get caught up in the hurt and realize that people are going to mess up. People are going to be insensitive. People sin. It is so ironic that when I am the one messing up, being insensitive, or sinning I sometimes forget that horrible feeling of being hurt or maybe I carry so much hurt it feels good to lay it on someone else for a while. When I cast off the old self and put on my new identity of a whole family instead of a broken one. When I see myself and others as God does my heart softens and the hurt I feel or dish out seems to diminish in light of what Christ did for me on the cross. He didn’t hold back love when He was denied by those closest to Him. He chose love. As my daily reminder I have taped by my bathroom truths about who I am. When I look at those before I start my day I don’t seem to get caught up in that old hurt. Christ paid my debt so I could be free. My choice is to forget what is behind and look ahead to the future. Thank you, Jesus!
well… gonna try my best :/ ( “not much” english) glad I’m not alone on this one…i’m going through a lot & the inside chatter is not helping at all…it make me feel worse. i need to do something, but not sure where start….Thanx for your devotional they been helping me a lot!!!
I have struggled with negative thinking for several years now in regards to my worth and identity in Christ. I have heard, “You are not good enough” or “There are so many aspects of your life that need to improve,” etc. Yet, in the last year, now a mother to my first child, God is taking me to a whole new level of faith and trust in where my value truly is. I have been learning that regardless of what I do or do not do, God says to me that I am precious, valued, and loved. I do not have to earn His favor, prove myself to Him, or work harder to try to “fix” what He has already made right at the cross. I can trust fully in the grace of Christ, for I have been given this as a precious gift. I am of great value to Him, and I am secure in His hands.
I know all to well about inside chatter.
My inside chatter is almost always negative. I need to learn how to change that negative chatter to positive. I need to meditate on God’s word and His truths more!
I have learned that it is better to cut negative chatter off at the door of your mind and not let it enter at all than to try and get rid of it later. There are so many things in my life that I have listened to over the years that I am still trying to overcome whether it was someone’s careless comment or someone’s pinpointed attack. The battle is easier one at the door than once it is inside, but it is still possible to clean house with Christ!
The “inner chatter” can get so loud, almost overwhelming at times. I stop and think is it true, helpful, positive, from God? If not, then I try and repeat God’s promises.
Inside chatter. The Bible MUST be the filter through which I listen to all chatter inside and out. I don’t think God “chatters” at me. I think the world chatters at me unceasingly. relentlessly. Nowhere in the Bible is God chattering. Please correct me if I am wrong. I must be reading the Bible and listening past the chatter to hear God. 🙂
Inner chatter can be good and bad. I’m encouraged to learn that bad inner chatter is just a weapon of satan and leaning on Jesus is how you beat satan and bad inner chatter. Studying and talking about inner chatter is a way to bring it to the light and reap fruit of the Holy Spirt.
I used to feel unwanted n not popular, growing up. My oldest brother wood always tell me I was ugly n nobody liked me r wood ever love me. For a long time I believed him, until I started seeking God n realized as long as he loved me, I didn’t need anyone’s love but His. The enemy wood come n plant all kinds of thoughts n my mind, n thought of suicide, but God n His mercy delivered me from those thoughts. Today, I no my worth n Jesus, n try to help other women, know who they are n
can b n Christ. I’m blessed! Blessings!
Inside chatter tried to overcome me when my daughter was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor at the age of four months. Instead I chose to stay in the Word and indulge in prayer. Soon the chatter was muffled and then subsided. I can only thank God for lifting me above the circumstances.
The inside chatter in my head began innocently years ago. My wonderful mother brought me up To have wonderful manners. This included any and all situations where I learned that I should not be a burden to anyone, But when we as children are younger it really just means to not invite yourself over to Other peoples houses and such things like that. I believe that my parents were right and that they were correct to teach me these kinds of manners…. However, in my naturally shy Personality, I let Satan lie to me over the years and let it turn into a situation where I let Satan constantly tell me that I was not good enough and not worthy. I got married and was afraid to ever ask my husband for help around the house. By the time I had my fourth child I felt like I was drowning in a sea of responsibilities And having a hard time keeping my head above water. I continued on a downward spiral thinking every other mother was better than I was, and that any other mother could handle things better than I could. The inside chatter going on was telling me that I wasn’t good enough to ask for help.
Thankfully, I have a very supportive family and they reminded me, especially my sister, that God stoops down to meet us where we are. They reminded me that I am a child of the most High King!
I admit that I still struggle everyday… The idea of getting past myself and letting people in is not a natural function for me. But he continues to remind me that He made the church a BODY of believers, and even though I may just feel like an insignificant part of it, that we ALLneed the rest of the body to function as a church.
Turn on some worship music and sing to God and soon the inner voice will be drowned out with Praises to God.
I discount myself and my accomplishments when my stress is high. When I get back into God’s word and focus that he is control, I tend to have less of it. I learned something importatnt in 2012, it is physically impossible to be thankful and negative at the same time.
Lysa, I just want to tell you what a blessing your devotions and FB posts have been. I appreciate your courage and willingness to make yourself so transparent and vulnerable to others of us battling the same things.
This negative chatter is the story of my life. I had a mostly-absent father, but when he was around, he was abusive – physically and emotionally. I also experienced sexual abuse as a child by a grandfather and an uncle. These early and painful experiences started those whispers, that inside chatter so long ago: You’re don’t deserve to be loved. No one could ever love you. You’re worthless. Even now, as a 40-year-old woman, I still hear those whispers and they are deafening.
God is speaking through you and others to bring healing and truth. I thank you for being God’s voice and heart and for being such an encouragement.
I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was 21 years old; I am now 35. Before that, I was a straight A student, the typical overachiever involved in everything in both high school and college. I was supposed to be going places; people expected great things of me. But God had other plans. Since then, I have constantly struggled with my “new” identity. Struggled with trying to restore relationships that I had damaged before I knew what was “wrong” with me, before I had medicine to help control the highs, lows, and emotional outbursts and destructive behavior that occurred. And in the 14 years since then, I had allowed myself to become a very bitter, angry, and resentful person. I had allowed myself to believe–even told myself over & over–that I was unlovable, unlikable, unworthy of any kind of good thing. Convinced myself that because my life didn’t turn out as planned, I was basically worthless. A recent painful situation with my sister left me crying out for God and His guidance. And do you know what I found? The very day I felt broken beyond repair, beyond hope, I was on Facebook and at the very top of my “home” page was the following post from Proverbs 31: “Dear Lord, I can’t mend this relationship on my own. I’m at a loss for what more to do or say. So I’m asking for your will to be done. I can’t change them, and I’m not responsible to. But I can change anything about myself contributing to the demise in our relationship…” It goes on, but this was like–wow!!–did God pound me right over the head or what?? So I clicked on the Proverbs 31 Ministries link, viewed that page and also Lysa’s Facebook page and was overwhelmed by how nearly every single most-recent post on her wall applied to my situation. Specifically. Like the post “Am I trying to prove that I’m right, or improve the relationship?”, and the “Honest cries for help lifted up to Jesus will not go unheard ” post (no joke, He started working on me right away!!), the post about “Yes we need to forgive, but forgiveness does not equal instant restoration…” which directly applies to my situation with my sister, and also Lysa’s Jan. 23rd devotional on the Proverbs 31 page, which introduced me to her book, Unglued. Both her book and the negative chatter information intertwine to show me so much about where I’ve gone wrong in my life. BUT—I have HOPE now, Hope that that I can change, and in fact am already changing. I have the KNOWLEDGE that I can face whatever my life and the future throws at me because I am God’s creation, He loves me, and I am finally learning to put my faith in Him and let it be enough to carry me. I am experiencing so much JOY, even amidst my sadness at the estrangement from my sister, because I have finally experienced LIBERATION from all that negative self talk that has claimed my life for too long and had changed me so much that I barely recognized myself anymore. I still have so far to go…but I know that He is leading me. THANK YOU GOD, FOR LOVING ME, FOR LEADING ME DOWN THE RIGHT PATH, AND FOR LYSA AND HER WONDERFUL TEACHINGS AND INSIGHTS!!! They have already literally changed–and saved–my life!
“Inside chatter” is the foot hold that Satan uses to turn me away from the plans that God has for my life.
I have learned that the more I put God’s truth in me…
The less ugly chatter I listen.
Garbage in, garbage out. And we get a ton of garbage as it is from many different sources. That is why it is important to constantly read the Word and praise His name and do not forsake the meeting with other believers so we can build each other up.
I so agree with Lysa about the inside chatter. Its funny how someone can say or do a negative or hurtful thing and then you replay it over and over again in your head. I remember the old adage, Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. That is one of the most deceitful and false statements that I have ever heard. I even remember my own mother quoting that from time to time. Negative words and actions can most definitely hurt you. Sometimes the wounds can be so deep, you may have wished that you would have been physically hurt rather than verbally or mentally hurt. At least you can heal much quickly from physial wounds. The verbal and mental can last for years and years. I remember being a little girl and being hurt over and over by people who were supposed to be my nurturers and protectors. But in my relationship with God he tells me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made, that I am a joint heir and that I am a royal priesthood and that I am made in the likeness of God. I now know that my identlty is not defined by what people say that I am but what God knows that I am. I can walk with my head lifted high because I know that God has given me my identity and that because man didn’t give it to me, he certainly cannot take it away. I used to feel really awful when I wasn’t included in events or activities of my peers, but in my studies of the Bible, Jesus sometimes had to walk alone and was not able to be a part of the worlds affairs. But that he still cam out in the end victorious. Sometimes we may have to walk this walk alone, and we may even be exiled. But never fear the only thing that is really important in this life is being a part of the family of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who will never leave us or forsake us. We are in great company when we are in his presence.
I have learned that “always” and “never” statements are not usually true unless you’re talking about God. To say “I always fail.” Is not true. I don’t always fail. Sometimes I don’t reach a goal but I don’t always fail. To say, “I never finish anything.” Isn’t true either. I finish some stuff:)
After my Dad left us when I was 11, I never really felt “pretty” or “good enough”. I would believe every guy that gave me attention really saw something special in me. I was wrong. After 2 abusive relationships I finally had enough. I stayed single for over 4 years and concentrated on my relationship with the Lord and raising my then 4 year old son instead. And guess what? God introduced me to the man I was supposed to be with. We have been together for 6 years and married for 5 and he not only tells me I’m beautiful daily, he makes me believe it. Now if I can just work on feeling like I’m worthy of his love (which at times I still have doubts).
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My inside chatter, or self-talk, is almost always negative. I try to combat it by personalizing scripture and reminding myself of God’s promises. Of course, as we grow, the testing gets harder, so I have to lean into Him more and focus on Him and not my circumstances.
I’ve learned that inside chatter is one of the best ways of our enemy to put us down and turn our eyes away from God. We need to know that God loves us for who we are and how we look.
I’m so glad to know that I am not the only one with unwanted inside chatter. Looking forward to more help with it. Thanks.
I think I stared hearig “inside chatter” in the first grade…too young, right? A girl at school told me she didn’t think my hair was fixed pretty (I never wore my hair fixed that way again). But that’s when I first realized people are looking at you, some are waiting yo judgen you and can’t wait to bring you down. That day I started to be obsessed with what people think about me. I remember being in the third grade and thinking I needed to loose weight. This inner struggle has gone on for most of my life. A couple of years ago I read Beth Moore’s, “So Long Insecurity”, and God revealed to me while reading that book, He is the only thing that matters. His opinion of me is the only One that counts, and I need to be pleasing HIM in my actions, thoughts and words. I laid my insecurities at His feet and HE released me of my lifelong pain. I am worthy because I am God’s. I am beautiful because I am God’s creation. I am loved because I am God’s child. I can’t say that my insecurities don’t threaten to overtake me once in awhile, but when I feel them creeping back in, I pray: “Father, I lay these at Your feet. I don’t have to carry these around. I’m not big enough to handle these. Here they are, God.”
Would really love this unglued package.. I have come unglued so many times, just because of the inner voices…of doubt and low self esteem, I need a lil glue and tape and band aids.. and some really good advice.. But I can say God has helped me so many time & so has many wonderful friends, thanks for always cheering me up.. with all your good & Godly advice..
Inside chatter is something I feel like I usually have to shake myself awake from. When I realize I’m stewing on all these negative thoughts, I have learned to address it in this order… I first order Satan or any of his demons out of my thoughts in the name if Jesus Christ. Secondly I ask Jesus to fill me with his spirit and help me deal with this situation that I obviously can’t handle on my own.
I have learned that it’s not the responsibility of those around me to make me feel good about myself. I can be confident of who I am in Christ because my worth is based on what He has done for and through me, not on the mistakes I have made or all the things I do everyday that make me feel like a failure. There’s a lot of talk about self-esteem, but it’s not really a Biblical concept. I am a human with a sin-nature and all that is worthy of esteem in me is of Christ. Let Him be given the glory and esteem for what He makes possible. What a load off, that knowledge has been! In my weakness, He is made strong, otherwise it would appear that I didn’t need Him. But boy do I ever need him! I am so grateful that I can walk with my head held high, no matter what my flaws, because I am child of the King. I don’t have to give in and be resigned to those flaws, but neither do I have to feel defeated or overwhelmed by them. Change is hard, but through the power of the Holy Spirit, it is possible. He is the glue for my broken pieces.
I need to replace the negative chatter with God’s truth. Hopefully, I can fill up with so much truth that there won’t be room for the negative.
I’ve recently discovered that I allow my Inside Chatter to keep me from allowing God to use me for His purpose and glory. 2013 has been declared a year of the end of Inside Chatter via God’s strength. “I can do all things through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:13
I learned a good lesson on inside chatter today. I posted a comment earlier and it was not posted. It gave me some wording the said “it was subject to moderation”. I don’t even know what that means but immediately I thought what I said wasn’t good enough or “spiritual” enough. Well. I am done with those thoughts. I am a valuable child of God!
Your inner self talk makes your life positive or negative. I’m thankful for God refocusing my self talk!
So many of us are haunted by what we imagine others feel, think, or say about us because of how we feel about ourselves. We can be our own most formidable opponent.
When I find my inside chatter telling me that something is wrong with me b/c I am 34 years old and I have never been married and don’t have a family yet, I remind myself that being married and having a family of my own does not define me….being a Christian does. I am learning that I have to put my relationship with Christ first. The Lord knows the desires of my heart and I know he will never forsake me.
This is an ongoing process for me! Negativism has been with me for so long. I am trying to substitute the positive in everything I do. Having a relationship with the Lord is a good start! Now to get rid of the inside chatter….
that it’s incessant and powerful. but God’s word is more powerful and true, even if it’s hard to feel that it’s true. the choice is mine, unbelief and staying in familiar feelings – or belief and choosing to take every thought captive, therebye entering into unfamiliar, yet welcome freedom and joy!
I have spent most of my life listening to my inside chatter. I’m so thankful to now know that inside chatter does not have to sidetrack my life. My heart is open to God and His blessed chatter.
Too often have I given in to the chatter created from the lies of the enemy. I too have fallen captive to small moments that had significant impact on who I was and unfortunately who I was becoming. I have been a people pleaser, but I am learning, through MANY experiences I will never please everyone, be included in every crowd, be the one with all the right answers, be the girl with the prettiest hair, the wife with the cleanest home, the employee who everyone likes, among many other areas of my life. But, what I stand in today is that I am the daughter of the King, that makes me a Princess. I am HIS and that is all that I need. I need to only listen to what He has to say about me. His word says I am fearfully and wonderfully made, have purpose, impact, and meaning. And if I am a Proverbs 31:30 woman I will fear Him and not let charm deceive me or beauty become my pursuit as it is fleeting! Only then, when I rest in the promises of God, will I truly be “pleasing”—and I only long to please the One who reigns on the throne and loves me so much that He died for me. The chatter fades the more I listen to what God says about me.
I have been battling that chatter for my whole life. Unfortunately, when I was young, the negative things In my mind were reinforced by struggling parents, well meaning relatives, cruel classmates, thoughtless teachers, critical bosses, and scathing co-workers. I have to make myself remember who I am in Christ on a daily basis. I wish I had the confidence in myself that I perceive in others.
I have so much inside chatter! It seems to have taken a new course in the last few months. I have recently retired from a full-time career in the military. I am now trying to find a job. But what is that I want to do? I have no idea. I am at home struggling with finding a purpose. Lots of inside chatter going on!
How many times even as an adult have I had the Inside Chatter. Most recently, a group of friends got together that I was not invited to. I was hurt. Nevermind that I already had plans. I felt like I should still have gotten the mass text inviting everyone even though the inviters knew I had plans and I could have politely declined. I always go back to the children’s song… “Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, think I’ll go eat some worms….”
I think a lot of the inside chatter comes from women being “people-pleasers”. There have been many times when I struggle with my “perceptions” of a situation because I didn’t get the response I think I should have that would indicate I “pleased” someone. I re-play conversations, comments, glances, texts, etc. over and over in my mind because I automatically assume that the intent behind such questionables are negative. Regret and guilt from past circumstances also drives me to “inside chatter”. Here is a favorite saying from “Come Away My Beloved” by Frances J. Roberts that soothes my soul like only God can:
“Your God is your maker. He is your defender. And He is mighty to save. Yes, He is not only mighty to save from sin, but He is mighty to save from despair, from sorrow, from disappointment, from regret, from remorse, from self-castigation, and from the hot, blinding tears of rebellion against fateful circumstances. He can save you from yourself, and He loves you when you find it hard to love yourself.”
He is my Supply!
Inside Chatter is something that I learned how to deal with it later in life. My husband, Daniel and I had tried for three years to have a child. Finally in Jan. 2008 God blessed Daniel and I with a beautiful baby boy, Samuel. We were so excited. However, when he was born, he had a birthmark that covered half of his face and it was BRIGHT red. Well it was a shock to us, however; to us he was beautiful no matter his birth defect. Later we would find out that he had Sturge Weber Syndrome and would suffer with severe headaches and seizures. Well of course, we did not try to hide or coverup his face, it was the way God made him. Although, that was not the way other people would see him. I remember countless times hereing people say “of my, he has been burned,” “bless his heart” “poor baby” ” I bet that hurts” and many people came up to us and asked had he been burned, what was wrong, was he ok, etc. Well as a mother that was a stab in my heart every time I heard a comment, and at times it even made me angry. I was like any other mother, I wanted my child to be accepted and not looked down upon due to use birth defect. Well when he was about 1, the doctors recommended for him to have some laser treatment to lighten the birthmark and to hopefully prevent the blood from continue to pool on that side of his face. Well after six laser facial procedures, you can hardly tell the birthmark is there. However, there are areas on that side of the face that will most likely never lighten, however, family, friend, classmates, and others that know him, see that has a part of him and never say anything about it. During all this time God had to equip me to over look the comments and chatter I would hear. Samuel is five now and about a year an a half ago he was looking in the mirror and asked what was wrong with his face. I told him that God made him that way and he was very handsome that way. I have heard him tell many that have asked that God made him that way. That makes my heart smile. I am glad that the chatter that others may have will not affect him from knowing that God made his the way he wanted him. In 2009, got sent a special angel to Daniel and I. Kaylee Madison was born as healthy as could be and unknowingly she was born with Down Syndrome. Yes, not expecting any problems, my feet were knocked from under me. For months I questioned God why, because we had been through so much with Samuel, why would he do this. At three months old she had to undergo heart surgery to repair the heart defect caused from the Downs. My husband and I have pastored since we were married and didn’t understand why we continued to be faced with trials dealing with our children. FYI: The devil likes to attack us with things that we treasure and hold dear but those trials only make you stronger!! Well she will soon be four and this post could go on for pages to tell of all the chatter that we have heard. But God prepared Daniel and I through the trials of Samuel to over look the ignorance of people. Every time someone says “oh she is special,” “Oh Leslie how do you do it” “bless her heart” and many other things, I stop them quickly and say “we thank God for sending us our angel, she has shown us the true meaning of love, and she is a glimps of the love of Christ.” She holds no grudges, loves everyone, never gets down and out, smiles through her sickness, etc. Today I feel honored to have been chosen to be her mother. In March 2011 we were given our third child, Haylie Jo. (Remember doctors said we may never have children) She will be two in a few months and she has been the little mother hen to Madison. She protects her, loves her unconditionally, and brings so much laughter and joy to our family. Now guess what Daniel and I still hear the chatter because our kids are close in age, however we would want it no other way. I thank God that he showed up and said “I am the GREAT PHYSICIAN, I am the one that gives life and chose for Daniel and I to be the parents he called us to be to three beautiful children. God made each of us into what he wanted us to be and the awesome thing is no one is just alike. We serve an awesome God and the thoughts, sayings, etc should never determine who we are. In God’s eyes we are his children and beautiful !!!
I would have to say that if you don’t stay in the word and prayer that inside chatter will destroy you, if you allow it to. The devil likes nothing more than to put doubt, fear, anger, etc. into our minds to get our eyes off the cross. But everytime he does that, I think back to these times I have talked about and see where God showed up and all I had to do was speak his name.
It is so easy to let my inside thoughts dictate to me how unnecessary I am in the Body of Christ. I need to repent and focus on the person of Jesus to overcome the barrage of negative thoughts that keep me in a prison called “self.” Freedom comes when I repent and turn my spirit to touch the living person of the Lord Jesus. He alone will dissolve the bars of my prison and lead me into freedom and abundant living only Christ can bring.
For me, it is my insecurities, the bait of the devil, that sometimes give rise to hurtful inside chatter. I rely on Phillippians 4:8 -9 to rebuke the devil.
“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.”
The internal chatter is a daily struggle for me as well. The negative things that creep in on a daily basis and try to steal my joy are numerous. I try to make a conscious effort each day to remember to keep the small things in perspective, focus on what’s important, and count the numerous blessings in my life. 🙂
I struggle with the inside chatter way to much. I have been working on it over the last couple of years. I know God voice should be louder than any inside chatter and I am trying to make hearing His voice my focus.
Agh! I have too much inside chatter! There are times that I can silence it, reject it, tell it that it does not belong here. The negative chatter is not me. It is not true. It is often echoes of the negative, toxic people and environments around me, the enemy trying to gain a foothold. Then, other times, it overwhelms me and makes me feel defeated. These times I turn to my Father, but I am trying to rely on Him all the time.
When I hear the “inside chatter”, I turn to God and ask Him if it’s Truth. If not, i look for a verse that speaks truth over the situation and pray. I dig into His word and remember who I am in Christ.
My memorization of scripture creates an “inside chatter” that can glorify Him. The more I focus on Him and His commands and promises the less I am inclined to believe the lies that Satan throws my way.
I think “Inside Chatter” started by just being a kid listening to my parents talk about other ppl. How they looked, how they acted, how terrible they were. And I thought that if my own parents were talking like this, then everyone else talked about others the same way. And that is where the Inside Chatter started. But after a life changing event happend that broke up my family (in my adulthood), I realized that NO one was perfect. Even these 2 “perfect people” that pointed out everyone else’s imperfections. And I totally started looking at everyone else differently and it changed the way I spoke to myself. I can’t say those years of negative speaking to myself suddenly vanished. But I do try to recognize it when I hear it. I can’t wait for this wecast!!!!
Thank you so much for the webcast, and the giveaway. I really needed this post today! I have learned that “inside chatter” is usually my mind lying to me. Now I must just learn to not believe the lies!
God is good! There are many other parties and more important people who want us to be part of their lives!
I ABSOLUTELY have negative inside chatter with myself all day, every day. I’ve never really thought anything of it or thought about its negative effects before. I’m glad someone has pointed out the way it can affect me and my family. Looking forward to the webcast.
My inside chatter started when I had a birthday party in 2nd grade. The kids came and enjoyed cake, played games and then when I opened my presents they tore up my favorite one from my grandma a white teddy bear. After they left I held on to it and cried so hard that they did not care about me to let me have my bear they got it dirty and tore one of its arms off. I felt like I did not mean anything to them and it took a long time to get over that. i know now that God is molding me daily and has given me so many gifts to use as I give back now with no chatter but what is coming from God.
I seem to always struggle with feelings of not good enough or just feeeling like I could be so much better than what I am. In those time I just try to remind myself of how blessed I am and how much i have to be thankful for. I will never be everything I think I shoudl be but as long as I am doing everything to glorify God that is what I need to focus on.
I have definitely learned in my 30 years to not listen to inside chatter.I’ve learned this slowly as I am aging and its a continuation.my inside chatter has got me in a mesd before.
I find the inside chatter still goes back to when I was growing up. In grade school I was teased from a very eary age because I wore glasses. “four eyes” In 5th 6th grade I was bullied by girls in my class who called me names and said I was the teacher pet. My Dad started drinking when I was in junior high and that escalated in high school..The tapes from verbal abuse still surface. I am in my early 60’s now and still struggle at times with the inside chatter. Knowing Jesus and knowing how much He loves me is my saving grace. So looking forward to the webcast. I have folloed Ms Walsh for years and admire her. Thank you for this opportunity.
Inside chatter really can take my mind into a dangerous place. When I start to recognize it I tell myself NO! and immediately turn my mind to something positive – a favorite scripture to remind myself what God wants me to “think on”.
I find that we, as women especially, listen to the inside chatter. It was refreshing to read your blog and realize-“hey! I’m not the only one!” and be reminded that I HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST, There lies the biggest thing that should fill me and define me-not the chatter! Thank you for an uplifting 5 minutes in my otherwise crazy busy day! 🙂
I have learned that this is a battle that doesn’t go away when we “grow up.” Satan will still try to fill us with lies if inadequacy no matter how old we are and we have to recognize that for what it is. We must depend on God to strength us and not let this inside chatter destroy us.
I have learned that when I listen to the “chatter” I go nowhere, that the devil wants me to be fighting myself and doubting myself internally so that I can’t grow, or accomplish anything productive, if I am warring myself within, the devil doesn’t even have to do anything more to derail any plans God may have for me and he wins, of course that doesn’t mean I don’t still struggle with it and my insecurities, but I do recognize it sooner than I used to and pull myself out of my self wallowing and speak words outloud telling Satan “Get thee behind me” and give God thanks for His love and blessings and usually I “snap out of it” and move forward fairly quickly, sometimes it is harder than others, but I am a work in progress. Growing daily.
When I hear inside chatter, I tell the devil he is a liar and start quoting scripture to remind me who I am in Christ.
All of my adult years I’ve thought I really had it together! Life is good, don’t sweat the small stuf……& it’s all small stuff. Then life happens and I “thought” I had handled the tough moments very “adultly” (is that a word?). I realize the inside chatter has been there, all along. A divorce that all the ministers & counselors told me “This is not what God had in mind for marriage”….I was doing the right thing. I was justified. My inside chatter…..my dream was crushed and disappeared. I was a failure because my marriage didn’t work. Dating a guy that I really wanted to be “it”….notice the “I” in that. I invested and changed and didn’t even realize what I was doing it….the old can’t see the forest for the trees. Things got rocky, he didn’t do conflict nor church and left to go back to his 2nd wife – I know, hindsight is 20-20! Inside chatter…..you failed again. Doctor’s want me to lose about 20 lbs….not drastic, but some work at my age…..inside chatter is stopping me before I even get started. Smaller portions, exercise – walking maybe…..I totally am not motivated to do it. I’m beginning to see my pattern…..my failure inside chatter is spilling over into everything else. I am a work in progress, I know this – but somehow I have to get up and M-O-V-E! I know in my head I need to follow through with something….my body just doesn’t want to follow. Thank you for posting this you have really given me something to think about and work on!! God blessings on your Lysa!! HE is truly working in you to help others! Thank you!
funny you talk about identity and insider chatter something I have struggled with and many women I belive do too. I have become much more aware of my thoughts in the last year. I used to allow thoughts to fly in and not give them much thought until that small thought became a BIG thought and I noticed I was analying something and then I would become angery or worry ect. I know take captive my thoughts and not allow negative thoughts hang around use Phil 4 to test them. The first line Whatever is True. Most things that fly in my mind end up leaving due to they are not True! I try to find ways to fill more good things in my mind such as praise music, reading ect and less time just “thinking”.
I have “inside chatter” constantly and still have much to learn about combatting it… It’s an ongoing battle thatI keep trying to over come. God is on my side- gotta keep remembering that!
Wow, this just hit home with me today. Learning that I can’t let Satan trick me into believing that inside chatter is a though thing. But our God is a big God and I am reminded of that daily!
I would love to win this prize package. I just don’t know if I can do the webcast cause my internet is so slow. Bless you for your devotionals. They really are speaking to me.
There are times that I have felt the same way when I was in school. Like you I did the same thing, sit at home and wonder why I wasn’t invited. Now, that I am older I wonder why I did that and even now that I have found a love for God I realize that not to let the small things get to me. Also, there must of been a reason that I wasn’t invited God knew and wanted me to stay home. I am so glad that I have found God in the last several years to teach me not to worry about the small things!
Have a Blessed day! 🙂
I have learned that the inside chatter can sadly manipulate my entire day good or bad. Staying focused on God’s word and what he wants to tell me during the day is crucial for successful living!
I am working on the negative chatter in my head. I didn’t realize how bad it was until just recently. I would really like to win this prize package and am really going to try to listen to the webcast. I really need to work on this chatter and change it. Thanks bless you all for this webcast and the devotionals. I am working on reading them.
They help me remember who I am in Christ.
“Inside Chatter” can be your own worst enemy especially when you are simply assuming. It is normal to feel left out but after reading this post the only thing that truly matters is our crown of glory we will receive when all is said and done. And that is something we all want to be included in.
I have learned that when my inside chatter starts, I have to stop myself by reading God’s promises. Some days I want to give in to the negative talk, but I stop myself & dig into the Word.
Inside chatter is the worst. Why is it always negative? Why do we learn to tell ourselves how stupid we are and how unworthy we are when something goes wrong instead of telling ourselves that we can handle it, that God can handle it? I’ve been reading your books. I find they’re so easy to connect with. I think we have a lot in common, and I read in Becoming More than Good Bible Study Girl that you had a Calvin Klein jumper dress when you were around 13. So did I!
Inside chatter is satan’s way of tripping us up…and for me, he plays around in my childhood insecurities. I want to drown it out with The Lord!!
I know that chatter very well! As I sat here reading your post, I thought most of that was well behind me and then I started thinking of many occasions in recent years where that chatter seemed almost endless. Thanks so much for sharing from your heart and right into mine!
The gift is awesome too, however, I have most of those books already. I would still love to win and would give the extra copies to some ladies who I know would really feel blessed to have them!
I have learned that inside chatter is destructive. It holds the power to destroy, if we listen to it. Looking back over my life, I can see where it has held the power b/c I did not know any different. Every day is an uphill battle against this negative chatter that no one else can “hear”, except One. I am sure it grieves His heart to see His child listening to such negativity b/c He knows how dangerous it can be. Philippians 4:8, His Word, prayer, and the power of the Holy Spirit are our weapons in this battle. I admit, changing our thought process does not happen overnight, nor is it easy to change a lifetime of listening to negative chatter. Old habits are hard to break, but thankfuly God’s grace is sufficient. We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us!
My inside chatter is my worst enemy. It happens more often when i don’t spend time in God’s word everyday.
I feel like unless I am in a constant relationship with God on a day to day basis that the chatter is going to always raise its ugly head
This is a battle that doesn’t go away when we “grow up.” in fact at times it seems to only have gotten worse, Satan try’s to fill us with lies of inadequacy and how we will never be good, skinny, talented,beautiful(or whatever else one may struggle with) enough no matter how old we are or how hard we may try and we really need to learn how to recognize it for exactly just that “LIES” We must learn to really depend on God to strength us and to let Him help quite this inside chatter and not to let it overwhelm and destroy us. you daily devotional 98% of the time help quite those voice so i thank you for that and pray God blesses you all! <3
“Inside Chatter” it’s actually part of a transformation project I am currently engaged in online. My inside chatter has largely been negative and self defeating. It’s almost a broken record seeking to break me. However, I am taking ever so seriously the scripture of tearing down every high thing which exalts itself against the knowledge of Christ. The knowledge of Him, and who He is in and through me, is the best way to quiet that inner chatter. I have a long way to go, yet I am making ‘imperfect’ progress everyday.
Big moment yesterday, I wanted to make an excuse to not meet my friend at the gym. When it was my time to either suck it up and go, or text her with an excuse I got my shoes and walked out the door. After I felt so good. Thank you for all your inspiring words that help us all.
I’ve learned that inside chatter is nothing but lies. That there are few inside chatters that have repeated themselves. Ones that started in puberty, yet still persist. And the only way I can keep it at bay is remembering who I am in Christ.
The inside chatter has caused me to almost double my weight since high school. I have listened to it for nearly two decades. It ‘s only been in the past month that I’ve thrown it out the window! I’ve come to realize all the things I thought were true, those little things I told myself because of this situation or that, or how this or that person treated me… NONE of it matters at all. In fact, none of it is even true. But it ‘s hard and can be so destructive. Now I’m left with the journey of losing the weight and changing my thoughts.
Inside chatter started in middle school for me and attacks me when I am weakest, when I have grown distant from God. I agree with many who expressed the same sentiment that this is the weak spot the Devil seeks, when entry into our minds is easiest. I self-deprecate more, I toss aside compliments more (must be pity which is why they are complimenting me) and I generally dismiss all of my successes. The more intimate I am in God’s word, the stronger I feel, the lighter I feel, the more I am prepared for all that comes my way. I cannot wait for this webcast. 🙂
So great hearing that others deal with this no matter how old we are.
I wish I could say I have won the battle against my inner chatter from my childhood but I struggle with it daily, sometimes hourly. I haven’t had time to read your wonderful books yet but know that this is a battle that only God can help me with and I need to focus more on Him to help me with it. Bless you for all you do for us.
I am going through a divorce and am struggling with positive chatter and negative chatter. Slow but sure I am growing in faith and allowing the positive chatter to win!~
Some days I feel as if I am in a constant struggle with the negative chatter that is my head. It is as if I am my own worst enemy. I am harder on myself than anyone. At some point, I pray, I will learn to give myself the latitude I need. Thank you for this message today!
Why is it that the inner chatter never goes away? You think thing would be different as adults, and sometimes it is just worse! I pray daily and have faith that it will go away or that I will at least be able to control it in my life. Thanks for your concern on this subject as well. Its helpful to know you are not alone. Blessings for this great webcast and package of giveaways!!
What I learned about inside chatter is that it’s debilitating. There is always something going on inside my mind and not growing up in a healthy environment I think makes it that much harder. I wish I was stronger, I wish I didn’t succumb to the intense inside chatter but I’m just tired. It is a wonderful thing to be strong in The Lord, but sometimes we just aren’t.
The most important thing I’ve learned about inside chatter is that it is a LIE from Satan. If my inside chatter says I can’t! God says I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me! The best way to battle inside chatter is with scripture, God’s Love letter to us! He loved us enough to pay a debt He didn’t owe so that we can come to Him. We owe it to ourselves to also love ourselves that much!
I’ve been trying to use biblical truths in my battle with inside chatter, knowing that I am a daughter of God, holy, beloved and chosen and that my identity is as His child helps me so much on those days when I tell myself ‘I don’t matter’. I am learning to do this more and more-praise God!
The inside chatter is something we learn to ” domesticate” . Not only do we need to turn away from ungodly time wasters. As we cast out ungodly thoughts and constant chatter but we need to fill ourselves with the word of God. There is such an inner peace just being still and knowing He is God. It’s almost child like and refreshing.
I didn’t see my last comment posted, but I do feel internal negative chatter is something I and most women deal with sometimes it is hard to be your own cheerleader and really try to counter all the negatives. I can’t wait to read Lysa’s latest offerings.
I know that chatter well. Satan puts it in my head most every Sunday morning when it is time to get up to go to church. He tells me you are tired this is the only day you can sleep in. You deserve to stay at home in the bed today. I have really been fighting that chatter the past couple of weeks. I am trying to be the one who always wins the battle. But I won’t say that I always win. But that is why I have to stay close to God so I can win that chatter battle.
This sounds like an answered prayer! I will be definitely listening tomorrow night. Thanks.
Oh boy, the inside chatter ha snever really stopped in my heart, but GOD is showing me the error of my thinking. I very much enjoyed seeing you in pella iowa. God Bless you. Thank you for the reminder 🙂
I’m learning to say NO to negative thoughts. I’ve learned to consider them vain imaginations. Thanks for your insights.
Inside chatter will destroy you if you listen to it. I can throw myself a pity party or get up and dust myself off. I remember I am a child of the living God and HE LOVES ME. Fight back with scripture. No weapon formed against me shall prosper
P.S. Today I am celebrating my birthday and this would make a great gift. Just saying. 🙂
I have learned that negative inside Chatter is the poison that rots you from the inside out. Physically and Spiritually. I learned that 95% of your physical health is a direct affect of your thought life. And thinking on the Lord positively ACTUALLY regenerates and reverses brain degeneration!!!!! Praise the Lord! Dr. Caroline Leaf has done this research.
Right now my inside chatter keeps saying “I don’t care”. Which I know isn’t what I should be thinking. I feel defeated and sabbatoged knowing that is wrong too. I need a new start and haven’t gotten there yet. I am tired of being a failure. I which I could get reprogramed.
And I know it starts with God’s word and standing on what He says it is just getting to that place of belief. Lord help my unbelief. Change me Lord.
I’ve learned that my inside voice can be very controlling and can ruin my day. I may have overcome a tough situation and thought that I put it behind me, but something triggers it and I put on a bad mood all day. I am constantly in conversations with God, asking him to heal my pain and asking him to relieve me of these negative thoughts. Thank you Lysa for your post!!
Love this article! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve allowed other people to determine how I felt about myself. I’m almost 50 and its something I still struggle with, but I am learning to “. Take my thoughts captive…” As the Word says and “think on those things which are good pure perfect lovely and of good report…” It doesn’t come naturally or easily but I would rather think about and know what God says about me than what anyone else says or thinks,
I’ve learned negative inside chatter can get the best of me if I don’t control it. I am getting much better since reading Unglued and have passed my book on to a friend at my old job and getting them for my daughter in daughter in law. Yep that chatter inside me can be devastating, but now I remind myself that I am His princesss, and I say what Melissa has taught us, “Jesus in me.”
It’s time to turn off inside chatter from the enemy. Looking forward to moving forward. 🙂
I’ve been struggling with this quite a bit lately. Those thoughts have been speaking extra loudly lately.
That chatter in your head can cause all sorts of issues .. I have been going through something right in my marriage now in which I allowed that chatter to take over to the point it consumed me in everything I did in my everyday life… I finally got on my knees and asked God to take care of because I had done all I could… I just had to remember ” with God all things are possible”!
Well I just found “inside chatter” today on Facebook so I don’t know much about it. I am always looking for something else to learn more about our Heavenly Father and to share with others what God has done for me. I know that someone will be very BLESSED by this wonderful package giveaway. These are all written by Godly ladies that seek The LORD. These items can be read, cherished, and passed around to some other lovely ladies that I know. May you be Blessed for all that you do in CHRIST.
Having struggled with depression and anxiety for the last 15 years, I’ve learned what that negative chatter really is.. the voice of the enemy. I’ve also learned that if I don’t arm myself with the Word of God, that I’m rendered powerless to shake those negative things that pepper my thoughts and threaten to steal my peace and my joy.
Boy, what a journey it has been so far, but I really feel like I’ve taken a turn toward healing in grasping the above concepts. So simple, yet so complicated. Kinda like most everything in life, right? Simply complicated.
Thank
I would love this package 🙂 Time to move forward in a positive way 🙂
Lord help me change 🙂
I have learned from my inside chatter that it is a way for the enemy, satan to defeat me before I try. That I have to read Gods word regularly and the inside chatter has a counteracting Truth and reminding me Gid is bigger than me, my problems and satan
The “inside chatter” can be deafening at times. I think it’s worse when you see your kids fighting it in their teenage years. All the bullying, cliques, etc. that I faced as a kid and prayed my own kids wouldn’t have to deal with, exists no matter what I do. Satan doesn’t need a new attack, this one has worked far too long. Sometimes my best defense is to just keep saying “Lord, I know you love me..” over and over and to remind my babies that He loves them too and no matter what, that never ever changes. When all else fails, listen to praise music and just shut the voices out all together.
Most of the time it is negative chatter and it only brings me down.
I have learned that the inside chatter comes in easily but it is so much harder to get rid of. It slips in and seems that some days it is almost impossible to get those negative words out of your head and to keep those feelings from entering your heart. Even the smallest thing that someone may have said years ago can come back in and cause you to doubt yourself. I have found words that come from people I love the most can hurt or help the most, but it is only through God can that inside chatter really be silenced or sometimes, just muted. Knowing that those words are from Satan and that God is the only one who can take those words and the hurt that goes along with them away makes me so thankful that we serve a heavenly father who loves us and wants to help us overcome our challenges.
I find the chatter comes up when i am in situations where I don’t feel my best (clothes too tight or just not as flattering as I’d like) I doubt myself and want to hide. I am trying to focus on my identity in Christ and that I am a child of the king and trying to rebuke Satan for tempting me to excuse myself from situations.
Would love to win the books and share with my sister in law’s!
What we put into our minds determines what comes out in our words and actions,
When “inside chatter” pops in my head, I read God’s word and pray. Asking God
to help me focus my mind what is good and pure. It takes practive, but it can be done.
Inside chatter- I hate to admit it
But this has taken over my life. I let the inner thoughts take over and allow then to alter my emotions, my relationships and most important- damage me.
Why do I give in- listen/believe these hurtful thoughts?
I am looking forward to the webcast.
Thanks, Laura
I have had very negative self talk “chatter” for many years. I realize it is partly my low self esteem and also the enemy. Would love to learn ways to stop!
I’ve had a lot of “inside chatter” lately, especially because of my husband deciding he didn’t want to be a husband or father anymore. When “inside chatter” pops in of me not being good enough or strong enough, I stick to Jeremiah 29:11 and ask God to block that “inside chatter”
Satan I the source of “inside chatter” he leads us to believe God is not on our side which leads our minds to think negatively! Negative thoughts turn a “mole hill into a mountain! For insistence I have been having problems with my step mom, when I don’t call her every 5 minutes she immediately assumes I am mad with her, which turn our relationship sour! I battle Satin daily an I refuse to allow him to control my mind 🙂
This year I did not make any New Years resolutions. I wanted to focus less on what I would do and more on who I would be. More of the woman God is calling me to be. God is revealing this includes getting inside chatter in check. By Gods grace alone I am working to bring every thought obedient to Christ, trusting people’s intentions, giving the benefit of the doubt, thinking the best, and staying positive in all situations. You never realize how negative your thoughts are until you try to stay positive. Definitely a work in progress.
I have had a lot of “inside chatter” over my life…
I think as women, we all do. But hear recently I have realized the more time we have for “inside chatter” the less time we have focus on God. When I start to feel like beating myself up with , going to down the low self esteem highway..I listen to some Jesus music, pray or read my Bible. It’s always gonna be there , but we have the choice to give into it or to please God & turn to him 🙂
“Inside Chatter” was always my friend until I began to realize how negative it was when I listened to it. Over the last year I have battled the ability to eliminate that chatter from my head. I’ve learned its the hand of the enemy trying to take away the Joy God’s trying to give me in the moment. I’ve allowed the chatter to dwell far to long and the smile always leaves my face. I’ve learned to talk back to it, shutting it down before it shuts me down.
*I’m sorry, I posted my comment before it was finished.*
Having struggled with depression and anxiety for the last 15 years, I’ve learned what that negative chatter really is.. the voice of the enemy. I’ve also learned that if I don’t arm myself with the Word of God, that I’m rendered powerless to shake those negative things that pepper my thoughts and threaten to steal my peace and my joy.
Boy, what a journey it has been so far, but I really feel like I’ve taken a turn toward healing in grasping the above concepts. So simple, yet so complicated. Kinda like most everything in life, right? Simply complicated.
Thank you for your encouraging words. Can’t wait for the webcast tomorrow evening! 🙂
This sounds like what has been going through my head for the past month when I was “left out” of something. Still at 35 this is so hard. I am trying to tell myself that I have fullness in God, but Satan really likes to tell me otherwise.
I am really starting to think that God is trying to tell me something. I read in my, “Made to Crave”, devotional today not to put importance on what people say about me whether it be positive or negative. This post from today is very similar. I must remember that I am not defined by what other people say or think about me. Gods word tells me that I am His daughter, that He loves me, and He created me to be uniquely me! God defines me, not the world!
I am currently doing Unglued in LBS at Central Church in Collierville, TN. I have realized so much. Inside chatter is going to be conquered…. only with the help of Christ alone.
Sorry I won’t be able to see your show (no cable) but I know you will be reaching a lot of hearts. Have a good night
I’m finally learning to deal with the negative chatter that has plagued me since I was little. Growing up in an alcoholic home made this difficult. I’ve learned to combat these thoughts with God’s Word and to ultimately follow His truth and not my feelings. it’s a daily struggle.
I sooo need to hear this webcast tomorrow night. This is a HUGE struggle in my life right now. I thought I had moved past it, but with changing situations in my life lately it feels like a full on daily assault. I find myself telling myself “I will not listen to the negative voices” I’m trying so hard to hang on to the truth of who God created me to be, to the truth that I am Priceless in His eyes – just today I was reminded of Casting Crown’s “Voice of Truth” song. I think I need to listen to that a lot right now. I know God can take the inside brokeness and turn it into something amazingly beautiful – just like broken shards/pieces of glass tossed to & fro in the crashing ocean waves is refined into breathtaking beautiful seaglass. All I need to do is look at pieces collected on the beach and be reminded of God’s great plans for my life, to help me rise above the brokeness and help silence the inside chatter.
I am still learning to deal with internal chatter – it’s so hard to turn that critical voice in my head off. Thank you so much for the encouragement and lessons you share through your blog!
You have to learn to not let negative voices of friends, family, outsiders, or even the media creep into our minds. All of the negativity becomes luggage we carry through life. We need to focus on God and what we are grateful for. When you start the day with prayer and a list of things you are thankful for (that money can’t buy). The day is overwhelmingly positive!
I’ve learned to quiet the inside chatter by reminding myself of God’s truth. his word and His labels for my identity help me to refocus my energies.
Sorry I won’t be able to see your show (no cable) but I know you wil. I know you willl be reaching a lot of hearts. Have a good night and thank you
When I was just 17, I became a mom. I had just graduated from high school and signed up for my 1st semester of college when the pregnancy test strep (all seven of them) showed 2 pink lines. I was ashamed of my poor choices and I carried the guilt that my son had me a mother. For many years after I gave birth to my handsome son Brian, I still had the internal chatter that was just another statistic of unwed mothers. I didn’t attend church because I didn’t feel worthy of being in God’s house. It was just 3 years ago that I truly met Jesus at Lifepoint Church in Fredericksburg, Va. I found my worth in Christ. He died for me and for the very sin I was beating myself up for internally. I discovered a new hope in the Word that God chose me to be Brian’s mom and what a blessing it has been to mute the chatter by the promises in scripture.
I have learned that if I do not keep the “inside chatter” in my head and heart lined up with the Word of God and who He says I am, the consequences can be devastating . . . not only to me, but to those around me. It changes how I treat myself and others if I allow any lie to resonate in my heart and then let turn to an action or attitude unbecoming to me as the daughter of the King. I truly wish someone would have taught me this truth when I was a little girl. Thank you, Lysa, for teaching a “not so little girl” a truth that is transforming me and for those I mentor : )
What God keeps showing me: He is always with me and he is enough. If he wants me to be somewhere or be with someone then it will happen. I had it not long ago that I was excluded from something, and even though I was really sad, and jealous, and angry, and a whole ball of emotions he reminded me again that I shouldn’t want to go places he doesn’t want me. I guess rejection can be protection–not that it doesn’t hurt.
I’ve learned that I have to be incredibly diligent in keeping the negative “inside chatter” from starting. I’ll be going along just fine and then a thought will pop into my head and the chatter will start. And it’s easier to stop it before it begins that after it gets some steam behind it. Loved “Unglued”! Working through the devotional now.
I went through internal chatter my whole life. I let it ruin any relationship or potential relationship up intil the age of 29. It was very strong as my husband went through very tough issues in our marriage. Satan was very powerful in that I gave him reign to my thoughts. I had no control. In a sermon at church, our pastor spoke on this and of how we have a choice in how we act and react with our thoughts. I had let them drag me lifelessly into a deep depression. I was in such a self piting state. But that sermon opened my eyes to the reality that I had a choice in it all and not only that but that I had a choice in what I thought about. I have escaped depression and am keeping my eyes and thoughts on God. Any time those thoughts make their way back in seems to be when I stay my daily, continual focusing on my blessings, God’s grace, the love of my family, a great chirch home, and on and on. I pray that everyone sunk into depression by awful thoughts could escape that trap. That they would allow Christ his rightful place as first. All things are possible with Him!!!!
I still deal with the chatter daily. I thought those feelings leave after you reach a certain age. I just turned 40 and they are still there. I am praying for peace for me in dealing with this once and for all. God Bless
An old friend called this “the record” that plays lies over and over in your head. I’ve never forgotten that metaphor. It is hard to turn that record off. So many hurts from childhood still sting – the year I waited at the end of my driveway for anyone to come to my birthday party, and no one ever did. The two friends in Junior High who sat me down and said that I could still be their friend, but that they would be best friends now. The year I didn’t make the Drill Team. As an adult, I still find it easy to fall into Satan’s snare of feeling unloved, inferior, and excluded. I think only the truth of Scripture can replace the record and give us that new identity. But it’s still a process.
Inside chatter is destructive and debilitating. I’ve dealt with it since I was a little girl having been made fun of for having a muscle disease, Crohn’s disease, etc. It’s still there at times as an adult, but I have grown to deal with it much better than as a kid.
My ‘inside chatter’ is not usually kind..in my 33 yrs on this earth I have battled depression off and on, and most recently in the last year deep grieve and depression. Last April I gave birth to my husband & I’s 4th son, we named him Hezakiah Charles.. he lived for 58 minutes. The journey I have been on has been so painful, I have been on my knees and face praying, crying and at times yelling at God just trying to understand why.. we were aware of his severe congential problems, but we were still hoping, praying for a miracle… he did give us a miracle though, our son is not suffering through procedure after procedure to have whatever would or could have been a normal life for him.. and than a few months later God gave us another miracle, one we were not planning, praying or desiring at that time.. another child. I am currently pregnant and expecting our 5th child, a precious girl!! Our 3 surviving children, 8, 6, and 2.5 are excited about their new sister due in March..one month to the day her brother was born and died. Through all this, I have blamed myself, held myself accountable and responsible..what if I would have taken vitamens earlier, or not taken tylenol when had headaches or the tums and pepcid when had heartburn..or fallen carring my than 1 yr old..on and on my inside chatter goes, and from there its bad mom, you don’t deserve your kids, or your husband..terrible wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend… and so on… Thankfully I have a great, AWESOME counselor who has helped me work through many of these, and continuing to believe, hold on to God and his promises helps me get through days..usually hour by hour, minute by minute and even second by second some days… I certainly do not know or understand most days what God’s plan is for me, my husband, and my family..but through it all we will remain faithful in trusting God, and believing Jermiah 29:11!! God is faithful, even when we are not, and as scary as the future may be, I know that God is there, and will always be there along the way!!
I have always struggled with inside chatter.
I used to beat myself up for being overweight, worthless, and hoplessness ( still do most days and I’m 34) . Recently going through a major life trauma has brought all the inside chatter back to surface. Had someone say recently “noone would want you you are used and abused” wow. That really hit home. It started a fire in me for scripture and Jesus. Hope this webcast can help me continue on that powerful journey. Thank you
I’m learning that I cannot continue to let my inner chatter control me. Satan has put such a stronghold on me that I am nothing to anyone and for many many years I’ve allowed that to become who I am. I am a no body and no one cares. This is so totally false and sometimes minute by minute, I have to tell myself this is false that I AM somebody and someone DOES love me—my ultimate Father.
I’m leading my very first women’s group through your “Unglued” study. Last week we talked about the negative labels we give ourselves. I was surprised and heartbroken to hear beautiful, Christian ladies describing themselves as worthless, unimportant failures. This week we are trying to combat those negative inner dialogues by reminding one another who we are in Christ. What needed and valuable encouragement your thoughts are to me today!
I am feeling a little more positive these days because of a sentence I read last week by Eckhert Tolle. It read “I am not my thoughts”. Wow! So now, I say that sentence whenever the negative chatter wants my attention. I am not my thoughts.
Thank you for letting me share.
I’ve learned that the inside chatter will never go away until you place your full trust in Jesus.
I was in 6th grade and life was not terribly happy for me. My dad was an alcoholic…verbally abusive and sometimes physically abusive. The neighborhood kids would make fun of me because my dad was a “wino”. They could hear yelling from our house anytime my dad was awake.
My dad would berate me. I hardly remember a kind word coming from him, ever, even when I was an adult.
“STAND UP STRAIGHT!”
“ARE YOU THAT STUPID?”
“YOU’RE JUST SAYING THAT BECAUSE YOU HEARD YOUR MOM SAY IT!”
“YOU LOOK LIKE YOU SHOULD BE DANCING AT THE ________________(insert name of stripper club) WITH THOSE CLOTHES!” (my shirt was tied at the waist, with no skin showing)
All of these things led me to years of telling myself the same kinds of things. I felt worthless and I believed I was horrible. I felt fat and ugly. I was afraid and felt so alone, but like no one would want me or care for me if I reached out anyway.
My mom tried hard to soften the blows to my wounded heart, but it was about this time that she sat me down at the kitchen table with a yellow legal pad listing all the things I was to do if she had a nervous breakdown. There were telephone numbers of people I needed to call and instructions on where to take my siblings until someone could come get us. But there was one seriously important thing missing. How would I know she had had a breakdown? What are the symptoms? Where do I look for signs that it’s actually happened?
I was terrified. I told myself that I didn’t know if I could do it. I wasn’t sure I was strong enough to handle this situation. My mom was the only foundation I had in our home and if she went missing, or crazy or was institutionalized I didn’t know if I could stand it. I felt like my world was ending. I almost wished it would.
I struggled through my teens and into my adult years feeling worthless unless I was doing things to make people love me or like me. I had to earn their love and friendship…or so I thought. I talked myself into a divorce that has permanently damaged my relationships with my children, especially my son, because I was so depressed and I thought it was because my marriage wasn’t what I thought it should be. I walked into a horrible relationship and 10 year marriage with a man who was very much like my father. This ended up in divorce, too.
Knowing I was not going to survive if this kept on I sought some counseling from a wonderful Christian counselor who told me that every day I needed to look in the mirror and say to myself, “You’re beautiful, you’re worthwhile and you have great ideas.” I was horrified!! I didn’t feel like that about myself. How could I possibly say those things to ME??? But I did it. At first it was painful. I felt like a hypocrite and a liar. But it started to get easier. Every day I would stand in front of the mirror in the bathroom and look into my own eyes and say: “You’re beautiful, you’re worthwhile and you have great ideas.” I finally started to believe it after a few weeks of doing this.
I still talk to myself. When I’m afraid I tell myself that the Lord is with me and I have nothing to fear. When I feel fat and ugly I recite John 3:16, inserting my name into the places where it fits. When I feel all alone in the world I tell myself that I have the best companion anyone can have in the Holy Spirit.
I still struggle sometimes. But I’m working on my negative self talk and turning it into positive self talk. I’m moving up, slowly but surely. I know finally that I am more than my numbers (age, weight and salary), I know that even though I don’t have a college degree that I am intelligent and capable and I know that regardless of what my earthly father said to me that my Heavenly Father loves me unconditionally.
Please remind me when the webcast will start! Would live to hear more encouragement on this topic!!!
Reading this helped me realize how negative inside chatter has shaped me and continues to impact me even at age 46. Satan loves to tell us that we’re not good enough, we don’t fit in, no one really likes us, etc…When we allow him to have free reign of our internal thoughts, we suffer terribly. God, however, bought us with a price and speaks words of love and affirmation into us. He tells us in Philippians 4:8 what to think about: whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent or praiseworthy. It’s the advice I give to my own children and others when they are struggling, but oh so hard for me to remember to do this. But I keep pressing onward towards the prize which I know is already mine…God’s grace is sufficient for me. Thanks for all of the great reminders and devotions.
I have learned two things
1) It has taken me a long time to recognize that negative chatter isn’t defining me, that it isn’t me and that I can replace it. (I thought that was just who I was I didn’t know I could do anything about it.)
2) I was taught to replace it with truth. Instead of letting negative chatter talk to me, my job is to talk over the negative chatter, talk to my thoughts and tell them: Jesus is truth, Jesus loves me, I am forgiven, I am a child of God. Sometimes I have to tell myself that many times in a day. I have to make my truth thoughts louder than my negative thoughts.
I have learned that all the noise is still there as I age. I have just learned to stop paying attention to the unimportant chatter. I am ALWAYS going to worry about my husband and children. I am also always going to give them my best. All I can do is pray that God works through me to do good things for them. All I can do is be myself. I was made this way to do these things. All the nonsense will still be there. It will fade away tomorrow as it turns into new nonsense.
Like Elena commented above, I too also commented previously and it said my post was “awaiting moderation.” I also used to react exactly the same way she said she started to. But because of my renewed focus on Christ, his faithfulness to me especially in these last few days to show me exactly what I needed to see, and because of my commitment to banish Satan’s sneaky negative thoughts, I know that all is ok! I am not stressing this! I am so thankful to Christ for leading me to Proverbs 31 Ministries and in particular Lysa’s books and Facebook page. Through daily prayer, Bible reading, doing devotionals from both Lysa’s blog and the Proverbs 31 website, and reading Lysa’s book Unglued, I am seeing myself and my life–including those around me–with Christ-covered lenses instead of my own eyesight. And what a difference it makes!! I love the changes it’s already making in me and I look forward to God “chiseling” away at me daily. It may be a daily struggle, but no longer will I believe the lies Satan tries to feed me. Instead I will embrace the truth of Christ and His love for me!
I am my own worst critic. The internal chatter can be so sad and disappointing that it is difficult to hear THE TRUTH. As I have gotten older, I do not allow it to go on for too long. I have learned to “talk back” with scriptures and prayers. Looking forward to the webcast.
I find that my inside chatter differs greatly from my outside persona. My outside persona is confident, have it all together, nothing shakes me. My inside chatter is insecure, scared, etc. I just hope through constant focus and attention I can see myself the way God sees me – beautiful and loves me right where I am!
I have learned that inside chatter is still quite painful…at 43 years old, it still hurts when left out or uninvited…the enemy pummels me with the lies of: “unwanted”, “unliked”, “unloved” & relationship tears at the seams. I have learned & try to remember that this is the enemy against me & those that do this – the enemy doing what he does best in trying to break unity in Christ Jesus…
I have learned that focusing on journaling, reading, studying God’s word, and learning to love myself for my strengths have helped to quiet the inside chatter. I am still a work in progress but I can tell you one thing – I never thought as a teenager I would be dealing with peer pressure issues in my 20’s and 30’s. I thought all those “older” women had there confidence and self worth all figured out. Boy was I wrong 🙂 I love the place I am right now because God is healing, revealing and restoring!!!
I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have Jesus and you ladies in my life today. I have been dealing with really ugly unsolicited inside chatter this last week and even today. i struggle to believe in the grace and forgiveness that I am promised through the love of Jesus. 18 years ago I laid down a life of homelessness , drugs , alcoholism and sex to follow Jesus . . So the unwanted chatter as you can imagine gets very overwhelming at times. I so appreciate the honesty and openness from you.
Somehow my internal chatter sounds like it has a megaphone.
Negative chatter is something I have struggled with for 40+ years and something that Satan always uses against me, as he knows it’s my weakness. I am constantly coming before the Lord to lay before Him the negativity I cling to. I look forward to the webcast and to a life free from negative chatter! Thank you for offering this to us!
Internal negative chatter seems to be one of satans favorites. But we have the VICTORY!!! It is my passion to remind not only myself of this but also other women! Once I learned of God’s armour, that this is a spiritual battle and to hold every thought captive I began to have victory. I began my weightloss journey (lost 100lbs in a year) by reading Made To Crave and a few other books. Repenting where I was wrong and watching God break the chains. There truly is freedom in Christ, amen! Thank you Lord for Your peace that surpasses all understanding. 🙂 <3
I have learned that it takes a daily choice of renewing my mind. To not let Satan speak into my mind/heart! I am a child of the KING. The Lord is my Abba Father and he adores me.
We are so driven by this world to perform, compete and be good enough. I realized it was so tiring and the Lord wants us to rest at His feet and soak up His love. My relationship with Him is truly all that matters. BE STILL before the Lord. Thank you for your ministry.
Wow, God has perfect timing! I have been struggling with inside chatter/negative self-talk all afternoon. I felt like I was grasping at straws when I clicked this link. Thank you for reminding me to ask God to be with me when I start listening to the inside chatter and He will tell Satan to leave if I am not strong enough at the time.
This is one area that I know I struggle with on a daily basis. I find it so easy to beat myself up over things that are beyond my control, but reading these devotionals and listening to KLove are my daily reminder that God doesn’t see me the way the rest of the world may see me and when I can remember that the voice quiets down at least for that moment.
lysa…I can so relate to this topic of inside chatter. I still hear it as an adult…I was just telling a friend this morning how I can talk myself out of good things such as a Dr apt or something because I shouldn’t be a bother….they wont believe anyway….and this hinders my physical health! How crazy to let thoughts determine my value….but I do:/ I cantvwait to listen to the broadcast tomorrow!
Inside chatter has been a big part of my life. I remember usually it was all bring me downs and negatives things bring thrown around. And usually they came about because I was also assuming things about people like their feelings toward me. Its really sad if you let it take control because then your constantly thinking people are all against you or you can’t do anything to succeed in life. Thankfully when I reconciled with the Lord after many years of being apart I’m finally learning how to stop that inside chatter and actually even change it to be a positive chatter. We have so much value in Jesus more than can be conceivable. And even of it is a battle maybe at first a constant battle it does become easier. Especially through prayer and asking Him to remind you of how precious and loved we truly are. Thank you Jesus for your endless Grace and Mercy!! God bless!!
“Stupid, fat and ugly”. The trinity of my truth; in my head. And heart. And ME. That’s the negative chatter that turned itself into truth, which defined ME since second grade, and I am almost 50 years old. I have added a couple more adjectives along the way – bad mother, divorced….negative chatter which unceasingly dampens and drowns out the beautiful voices of our loved ones, who can’t possibly be right when they say something NICE.
Every day is a battle for all of us – we all have some kind of negative chatter…They (whoever “they” are) say it takes TEN nice things (all different!!) to make up for one nasty thing someone says to us. Oh, come on!!! Really????? Is negative chatter that powerful? Oh yes it is….it is who I am, and how I live, and what I believe I deserve. I am so sick of being depressed, and being “stupid, fat and ugly, and a bad mother that divorced”. No one sees that negative chatter. I can sure hide it well. But inside it hurts.
And God made me in His image, knitting me together in my mother’s womb??? He must have have two very different size needles!!!! After all, my earthly father was good at calling me his “stupid, fat and ugly” girl that even when I defended my doctoral thesis and was called “Doctor Pacitti”…I thought – man, have I got them ALL fooled. Better run before they realize their mistake”….it took years for me to realize that his drinking served to mask his own depression, and he never realized what he did with his words, to his daughters.
And God, our Heavenly father – through Jesus, His son, and Holy Spirit – defines LOVE in its simplest form. “I give you two commandments – Love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength, and Love your neighbor as yourself.” (the red words in the Bible). That’s the agape love – the EASY part. But it is so hard to love ourselves, when others, here on this earth (fathers, mothers, teachers, etc, etc) plant seeds of lies in our heads, that take root, and grow into redwood trees in our brains. And then serve to define us with their negative chatter that drowns out every good thought Paul spent time telling the Phillipians to think upon……Oh, man.
Let’s get the armor out and fight this one.
I can’t wait for tomorrow night. Really – I love how real Lysa is – how God-loving, Christian, and real. I can’t wait!!! Let’s all be real. And live with the TRUE trinity. Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
Inside chatter has had such a huge impact on my life. I struggle with not looking for my worth in someone else’s eyes. I really do know who’s I am, but there are times when I can hardly stuff a sock in that condemning voice inside. It is a process however, and I am getting there.
What I’ve learned is that it is hard to overcome negative self-talk when I don’t focus on God’s word but instead look to others to validate my self-worth. When focused on pleasing God it is much easier to listen to Him. Thank you for this opportunity.
Lysa, your post today is so on target with what I have been struggling with for a good part of the weekend. The inner chatter has been beating me up and usually I turn to food to quiet the “voices”. I love it when God meets us right where we are over and over again. In my quiet time this morning, God shared with me James 1:5-8. I asked Him for His wisdom in handling the echoes that kept reverberating in my head. The key was that I had to believe and not doubt. Well, imagine that. I believed Him and the voices stopped. How awesome is our God!!! Thank you for encouraging so many of us on this walk daily through Proverbs 31 and your posts.
Inside chatter and the old abusive statements that began with my father and then came from my husband is a constant battle…..praise the Lord that I have found Jesus and now have an ally. I’m a single mother of two and i do all i can to d
I’ve learned I am much more vulnerable to discouraging chatter when I am tired or overwhelmed. Taking some time to relax and refocus helps me to be able to evaluate chatter to see if its true or not.
I learned that inside chatter is destructive. I was constantly teased when I was younger because I was “different”. I had to wear the hard glass contacts and could not look up into flourescent light, my nose ran all the time, and I was overweight.
When I started liking who God made me to be, the teasing lessened greatly. When I look at myself through His eyes, I see a princess
Lysa…I don’t think there are very many of us who can’t identify with what you’ve said about “inside chatter.” We all struggle at times with the voices we hear inside and many times we actually listen to those voices. We actually allow those voices to determine our worth. Crazy but true. I’m thankful for the many times that someone like you has reminded me that these are not the voices I should be listening too. There is only 1 voice that actually speaks the truth, Jesus. I am really looking forward to the broadcast tomorrow evening!!! Blessings.
The inside chatter drives me crazy everyday!! I struggle with such negative self talk so often. I can’t to watch the webcast!! I’d love to her some good advice!!
I find the inside chatter tries to tell me I’m not good enough. But, I am finding my identity more and more in Christ, and relying on what He says about me, instead of feelings and situations.
Don’t put the wholeness of your identity into the smallness of this situation! WOW! Why is it so easy to live in the situation from day to day. It’s much easier to look at the situation than at the big picture and see what God has planned to work in you through the situations He has put you in. Thanks for the quote! I’ll try to remember it in every SITUATION!
Some days I do really good and I can shut the chatter up, but there are many days that it is just too much and it can really get to me. These are the days I have to keep a big reminder on that I am a daughter of the King and there is nothing that will change that. It is Him that I am looking to impress and not those around me. Today I have kept singing in my head “If God is with us than who can stop us and if our God is for us than what can stand against.”
I have the inside chatter from when I was younger. I have found that I can come as I am to God on each and every given day. All my broken pieces and parts He will take care of. It still affects the way I think and see things but I am getting better at not just seeing the broken pieces but a person. God has made me whole, I just need to see it.
My “inside chatter” has been the most destructive thing in my life. It haunts me on a daily basis. I have always based my worth on what people think of me or how they have treated me. Thanks for your post, it was very helpful today of all days.
Ahhh! That incessant chatter that seems to buzz in your head and make you feel inadequate and worthless. Yes, I have that going on and it beats down on me and speaks to me about how I cannot do anything right, or you know you want to eat that chocolate even when you don’t really want it at all. God is the only solution for this chatter. Reading the word, spending that quiet time with God and focusing on all I can do is what continues to get me through. I will admit there are times when it feels louder and my defenses are down but each and every time God has quieted the inside voice and has reassured me that I am loved and full of worth in His eyes.
This is a constant battle for me. I have found the only way to combat inside chatter is with God’s promises found in scripture.
Internal chatter is very, very powerful – whether for good or for bad. I desperately need to learn how to harness this and allow it to EMPOWER me.
I still hear the negative inside chatter in social situations where I feel that I don’t fit in. I can’t wait to hear what you have to share.
Inside chatter sneaks in even in adult life, it is something I still struggle with from time to time. Can’t wait to hear the webcast.
I have learned, through Bible studies (especially Lysa’s ‘Unglued’ Bible study), sermons, and the like, that the more we put our hearts into check with what God’s Word truly IS, the more POSITIVE that ‘inside chatter’ becomes. “Reactions determines REACH!” 😉 I believe for most that this ‘inside chatter’ can be very similar in comparison to “Paul’s thorn” that he spoke of. Many out there have a natural inclination to have negative inside chatter, so that is why this keeping-in-check-with-God’s-Word-in-order-to-stay-positive ordeal is very vital to everyday living. Just like your story Lysa, us Christian’s need to continuously take what’s going on & put it into perspective. We need to remember where our identity stems from, & always stay grounded in & to that. But it doesn’t come naturally, & that I think is a good thing, actually; because this unnatural behavior that we need to fine-tune may be, for some of us, the one thing that continuously draws us back to our Savior (hence, the relation to Paul’s thorn). That God of ours, always so clever in taking our broken-ness & crafting it into drawing us back to Him. That guy’s pretty good. 😉
Some days I wish the voice in my head had a mute button. The inside chatter can be so loud I can hardly handle it. I know it is Satan just creeping in and I have to tell him to leave me alone…sometimes in an audible voice. Then I pray for the Holy Spirit to fill me with His words and keep my thoughts fixed upon Him.
I can remember my inside chatter starting around first grade. I wore used clothes, that’s not cool. I wore glasses, definitely not cool. So I was made fun of a lot. As I got older I noticed I was bigger than all the girls so I felt gross and fat, in reality I was just really tall so of course I was bigger. Then it was I was too smart, not cool enough. There was always something. In college I allowed my inside chatter to take over even more and my weight ballooned. I still really struggle with inside chatter. I just have to remind myself it goes back to my inferiority issues and that God loves me. I’m still figuring this out.
I have just begun learning about inside chatter. I am very excited that I have found your website and all that you have to offer in dealing with this. I have been dealing with it as “Old Painful Memories” and I am finding ways to change those memories into “Healed by Him” memories. Thanks for all you do and I would love to win the awesome prizes! God bless you for all you do!
It took me years to learn that inside chatter was the reason for my timidity and frequent depression. I am learning to recognize the difference between the lies of inside chatter and the truth found in God’s Word. When I remember to evaluate what I am “hearing” to learn whether it is truth or lies, I can much more readily fight those lies with God’s Word!!
Rarely is my inside chatter “God centered”, it is usually “Me centered”. Refocusing on God clears up the static.
Terry I couldn’t have said it any better. Satan loves it when we listen to our “inside chatter”. As soon as I start focusing on God and all of his blessings in my life satan flees !!! Light definitely overcomes dark !!
I read this as I am sitting alone, left out of my marriage due to the inside chatter some of which caused by outside chatter. Everyone telling us we can’t make it and me listening to the chatter in my head. The chatter is quieted when I am with God. I need to be with God more.
It is so easy to expect the worse out of life and people. We really are products of our childhood. In my life my, negative chatter starts with negative expectations. When my expectations aren’t met, then I begin to think, “They don’t really like me, I am unloved, not important.” From there, I have connected so many emotions with negative thinking, that I feel imprisoned. I love in Unglued the story of the David sculpture, that was so freeing to me today. I want God to chisel away at me.
Rarely is my inside chatter “God centered”, it is usually “Me centered”. Refocusing on God clears up the static.
I still catch that chatter going on inside my head as an adult, and try to remember to hold those words up to The Word.
I long for the time when the days of positive inside chatter outweighs the negative inside chatter. I truly believe saturating yourself with the way of the Lord will help you to reach that goal, it is a daily process. Speaking the Lord’s promises after the negative chatter gets to loud is like blowing on dandelions with the wind carrying off the thistles. We serve an awesome Savior. Thank you Lysa for all your encouraging words and for being real.
I have dealt with inside chatter for a long time. Which made my life challenging. It challenge my friendships and parenting skills. I always second guess myself on things, which made it hard to move forward and grow. Looking forward to tomorrow night. You and Sheila is some of my favorite authors. 🙂
I’ve learned that I need to pay attention to my inside chatter. The more I have paid attention the more I have realized that my thoughts are very negative a lot of the time even though I come across as a fairly positive person. Since I have discovered this about myself I keep one word in the forefront of my mind. That word is forgiveness. Forgiveness for my spouse. Forgiveness for my child. Forgiveness for myself. This one word has really helped my negative inside chatter to become more positive and much less harmful to my mental stability. What peace I have now that forgiveness is my focus!
We have to remember and rest in God’s unfailing love for us. We are the “apple of his eye.” He loved us enough to send his only son to die in our place to offer us eternal life…John 3:16.
Inside chatter happens when we allow ourselves to feel that we are less than God’s cherished child. He has proclaimed different truths to us, and we must allow them to anchor to our heart to fight Satan’s attacks of self-condemnation and criticism.
We are to pray for those who despitefully use and hurt us……”The only success some people taste is taking a bite out of you.” These people need our love and prayer support. As the Bible states, “Love overcomes a multitude of sins.”
Looking for so forward to this webcast tomorrow night. Inside Chatter has always been a problem for me, and I’m learning to let go of it now, but any and all tips will be appreciated. Looking forward to hearing you all share on this topic.
I had a hard time reading your message because of the tears in my eyes. I still struggle with feelings of not being included. One thing I hate about facebook is seeing pictures of cookouts, parties, etc. that I wasn’t invited to. I know that God loves me just the way I am, but I still long to be accepted by others. Thank you for this reminder.
Inside chatter is something I still deal with regularly. I have found that there is something that I feel I am missing, when it happens. I miss having friends to just go hang out with, or I miss having someone hold my hand. I guess I am envious of others! Yet what usually helps is looking at what I do have, and we really do not know if what they have is all that better. Their life could have some pretty big problems we know nothing about. Focusing on all the wonderful stuff I do have helps me to move on, at least until the next time.
This was exactly what I needed today. I have struggled with negative “self-talk” ever since childhood. And I’ve learned through my recent bible study that God made me who I am. And HE decides my value. Yes, it doesn’t feel good to be left out. But God has a purpose for every life lesson we learn. Those LESSONS are BLESSINGS!
When the negative chatter begins in my head, I try to quote Scriptures to combat the lies that Satan is planting. The truth will set me free! Not only do I suffer with this, but I am seeing my teenage daughter have her own issues which I am desperately trying to help her fight with the truth of God’s love for her.
The times when we are excluded by people…That feeling and inside chatter that dwells within…It can only be the Holy Spirit that reminds us who really loves us and what really matters. The hurt from an awkward moment of being excluded is real and does cause that inner chatter to attempt to convince us we’re not good enough… It could only be God who can take that moment and to change us when we look to Him. And oh how He does! I related to your story. I’ve been there. I too had the experience where all other teen girls in my class were invited to a friends pool party. I was excluded. Years later, others have done something similar. Those moments are awful. But Gods grace in many other situations far outweighs the icky awkward moments. He gives us the courage to continue on and then through His grace displays in unchanging and unfailing loving kindness for us. That’s just amazing and everything! Beside we who follow Christ will experience the greatest celebration when we meet Him! The greatest party is yet to come! 🙂
Thank you Lysa, for your post discussing ‘Inside Chatter’! Your words and the comments from others are more encouraging than I can say. God Bless you!
It is definitely difficult at times to quiet that inside chatter! But I have learned, just in the past few years, to allow the Holy Spirit to renew my mind moment by moment and to keep my eyes fixed on Christ at all times. I have certainly not mastered my thoughts completely, but with God’s help I’m a work in progress and learning to give myself and others some grace.
I was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer and bone metastasis in June of 2011. The Lord spoke to me that day and said don’t worry about it,it’s going to be alright.My husband of 32 years was crying and i told him God spoke to me. The bone metastasis has been gone for 12 months now and the lung cancer was radiated in October and was not visible on last pet scan.During this time I went back to church and got baptized and found my church family.The bone cancer has only 4or5 confirmed cases of healing.God has blessed me. Well on Jan 12 of this year I lost my husband and partner. I know there is a reason this happened,but i kept telling myself it should have been me.I broke down one night and really spoke to God. I am not sure what changed,but i woke up feeling better.He arranged in advance for me to have my church family,they gathered around me and it is so nice. I believe God knew I would need these people of faith to help me through this. I know this isn’t really about the subject,but I felt compelled to write this. So please forgive my going off the subject. Thank You Nancy
I’m ashamed to admit that I’ve dealt with those inside negative thoughts all of my life. It began as a child in Kindergarten on the playground, continuing through high school where I watched far too many pink shirts go waltzing by me, and into my adulthood at work, in Mommy & me play groups, and I’m most sad to say, at church. I’m so grateful for these words! It’s been just today that I let them creep right in and attack me from the inside of my mind and all the way down to my heart. It hurts and leaves a big empty hole on the inside along with bitterness and jealousy that has no place in a Christian heart. Thank you so much for reminding me that I have the fullness of Christ and the fullness of His Grace!
I struggle with negative inside chatter all the time. This has come such a wonderful time.
I have just decided to do something about it. I have a hard time shaking some of these feelings I am so in hopes that this will be the God send I have been looking for. Sometimes the smallest things will set me off ,just like the towels in the bathroom you talk about it could be anything like that. I am so looking forward to this.
God’s word says we are worth far more than the sparrows
After a recent break up with the man I believed I would spend the rest of my life with, I was left feeling empty…except for my inside chatter. What can I fix that will make him love me? What can I do to be a better person? How can I change my looks to make him more attractive to me? Why are all my girl friends married with children and now here I am…single?
These thoughts were constantly flowing through my mind. “I’m not good enough” is all I could think. Even talking to my family and closest friends, their positive remarks turned in to “They are just saying that to me because they have to. They’re only saying it because they are my friends and they feel sorry for me.”
After months of sitting in my room crying and feeling sorry for myself, I wanted to feel better…I wanted to be happy again. I started to pray for my ex-boyfriend. His sudden breaking off of the relationship finally made me realize that he obviously had things going on in his life that he needed to take care of…without me. He needed praying for.
I started to tell myself that my friends are being honest with me and that I needed to listen to them and let them help me through this, rather than throwing out their words and feeling sorry for myself. I started to let them know how much I love them and appreciate their friendship.
I spent 4 months in bed, I lost weight, and I felt worthless. In one month, just changing my negative self-talk, I am now spending time with friends, I haven’t cried much at all, and I just feel happy with who I am and what I have discovered about myself. God is amazing and my relationship with him has truly blossomed through this tragic event in my life. I was living a terrible 4 months because I was thinking terrible thoughts before I went to bed, as soon as I woke up, and all throughout the day. I started waking up and reading Proverbs 31 devotionals each morning before work and thinking about them throughout the day. I now have recruited several girl friends to read Proverbs 31 to help start their days on the right foot. The girl who was sick and in bed over a break-up is helping other people be more positive and happy in life??? Really!? I started going back to church…I had stopped because church was such a huge part of mine and his relationship and I couldn’t stand to go without him. I now go with a good friend and her husband and I look forward to Sunday mornings just for this reason.
My love for others in my life has truly turned me around and made me realize who I am as a person and all the great things I have to be thankful for. Negative self-talk can truly define you as a person and after 4 months of allowing my negative self-talk to define me, I am DONE and I have officially become a better person than I believe I have ever been.
Thank you Proverbs 31. Thank you God.
This takes me right back to childhood. I am so glad that I can find my confidence IN HIM every day and let go of the things I can’t control. It’s amazing how much things change when you let God into your every day life!!!
I think a lot of times we focus on the negative inside chatter simply because satan knows our weakness and he preys on that. He puts the negative thoughts in our minds and we focus on that and make mountains out of mole hills so to speak. Jesus loves us and He thinks we are “beautiful” just the way we are. We should try to focus on God and how He sees us and not focus on the negative inside chatter.
Inside chatter is the worst. It is such a battle. I am just worn out fighting. Sometimes I just want to quit!
I deal with inside chatter daily especially after I’ve had an “unglued” moment. Thankfully I participated in the recent Bible study of your book, “Unglued” with Melissa Taylor. I realize now that I don’t have to believe those thoughts & have experienced such mercy & grace from our Lord. Thank you Lysa for writing that wonderful book!
Thank you. Thank you for being honest in admitting what so many struggle with. The school story brought tears to my eyes because the same thing happened to me. It doesn’t matter that I’m 42 years old…the negative chatter still exists. Except for one difference now, I know how to fight it… with the truths of God’s word. I may not always be victorious in the fighting, but I keep getting back up and filling my heart and head with the truth. again.. thank you so much!
I have learned that inside chatter is not good for me. My inside chatter tends to be negative. I think we need to open the word and read God’s truth when the inside chatter starts.
I love how God works! I can see from several of the previous comments that I am not the only one who has struggled with this, even as an adult. God has led me on a journey the last year and a half that has revisited all my childhood and teenage insecurities. Being a single mom has given me a whole new set of inside chatter. I am closer to God and yet in some areas I feel further away from Him. I feel some days it is a teeter totter of back and forth. I want to do this study ~ and I know a few friends of mine that would benefit also. I am looking forward to the live web cast tomorrow! May God continue to bless you both as you bless so many women.
I felt distracted my whole drive home, I picked up my beautiful teenage daughter and found I was not “in the moment”. My whispers of inside chatter that started in my crowded office had followed me out and reached a roaring thunder. I missed those very precious moments, aware of her voice, but the chatter won. Please Lord don’t let me miss another moment with my children, quiet the chatter as only you can.
I’ve just recently discovered HOW MUCH negative chatter goes on that I was not conscious of. It is NO WONDER I have been so scared to venture out when I am constantly barraged with the thoughts that I cannot, am not, should not, and am not capable. In fact, it’s a wonder I can function at all with the horrible negative thoughts I have. Now that I am aware of the frequency and power of that chatter, my prayer is that through the power of the Holy Spirit and in Christ I can put into practice 2 Corinthians 10:5:
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
I know that I am enough, I just want to actually start believing it.
I am SO looking forward to hearing you ladies tomorrow!
I find myself every day as a mother with the inside ‘mother’ chatter. I didn’t get to that; I’m not a great mom, I didn’t play as much with them tonight; I’m not a great mom, I wish I could be more like (insert any other mother’s name here LOL), she really has it together; I’m not a great mom. I would love to find a way to acknowledge, I am a good mom, I care and love for my kids more than life itself, I raise my children with God, and even if I am not (insert any other mother’s name here), it’s ok, I am still a good mom. I want to change the inside chatter to what I am doing right, not just what I am doing wrong!
I am learning to turn a deaf ear to that inner chatter and to dwell in the loving ‘chatter’ of God’s word!
Your devotion really hit home for me today. Recently I was told I couldn’t be included in my former mother-in-laws birthday party because I was no longer considered family. I was married for over 30 yrs and have 5 children with her son. I just couldn’t get over it and it hurt so bad. I was reading one of my devotions over the weekend. John 16:33 Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world. Peace comes when we’re walking in step with the God of all Peace….focused on Him, trusting Him to see us through our storm. This means fixing our eyes, not on our problems, but on the Lord. Once I did that, the pain went away and I knew God was right there with me. I had taken my eyes off him and didn’t trust him enough to help me.
I have had “inside chatter” bothering me since I was young. I would question “am I good enough?” or “why do I tend to take the back stage to others?” This has been a battle that I need to learn to get over. I need to realize these are small things in the big picture of things. I know I am special to my God and that he love’s me no matter what. I just need to learn to tune out the “inside chatter”.
Although I sometimes struggle with negative inside chatter, I have learned to cling to Jesus and to tell Satan to go away (out loud). It really works! Praise God!
Oh goodness – you are right on the money with me!!
It’s crazy – even as an adult I struggle w negative self-chatter.
I am also helping my daughter work through it!!
Thank you so much for the verse!!
Can’t wait for the webcast!
Thank you so much for always sharing your heart on such applicable topics!
God is using you!!
I have been there. Escpecially when I was growng up. But God has healed my wounds over the years. Psalm 139:14 “I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well”. These words helped me to see that no matter what everyone else thinks of me God still loves me and I decided that as long as I have God on my side I will never be alone.
I constantly struggle with ”inside chatter” as a young mom of three daughters. I have to daily remind myself that what I hear inside is a reflection of where I am putting my time and values. The more I read God’s Word, the more I will hear His promises. I want to pass this on to my daughters as well and pray they always turn to Christ when dealing with their own conscience!
I’m still learning about “inside chatter” every day. It is so hard to listen to the “inside chatter” that comes from God and the inside voice that comes from my own insecurities. I would love to learn more on how to deal with this in my life.
Lysa,
I am only this past year learning just how much “inside chatter” has debilitated me, my walk with Chirst, my marriage, and my family. I have in the past 6 months come to find out how many lies inside my head I’ve been listening to about myself, my marriage, and my God. I finished “Unglued” and began to read “Made to Crave” again (had to stop to read “Unglued” first!!) and have learned so much from them! I cannot tell you much a relief it is to know that I am not the only one who struggles with this-one of those lies- and that I DO have POWER over these thoughts through Christ that is GREATER than the thoughts themselves. Today’s blog is also a great one to share with my daughter who just had her first real break-up. I want her to know just how loved she is by us and especially by her Savior. That her identity is not what others may or may not think of her; but is based on and in God’s truth. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you Lysa for your encouragement, and much-too-relatable story. I’m the worst for talking down to myself. It’s something I’ve fought my whole life but am slowly trying to overcome.
When it comes to inside chatter, it’s so vital to have verses of Truth store up in my head and heart so the Holy Spirit has a pool to draw from in those moments. I need to recognize the chatter immediately for what it is, capture it, and replace it with those nuggets of truth.
Oh that inside chatter can be downright deafening! I always thought I would outgrow it. I’m sad that I still hear that negativity as an adult.
God is grrrrrrrrrrrreat. We complain about everything. We seem to only rely on God when nothing else is working. If we would only realize that if He commands the mountains to move they move. Half the time our problems are much smaller, so BELIEVE. Nothing is too far out of reach, behold the power of GOD.
I’ll never forget my English literature class during my junior year in college. I asked the professor what I thought was a rather benign question. The response I received in front of the entire class was, “Well, that was a dumb question.” I was stunned. And crushed. I tried to hold it together during class, but I just couldn’t. After about 15 minutes of trying to blink back the tears I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I leaped out of my seat and raced to the bathroom to release the flood of tears that were coming out of my eyes. And God met me in that bathroom. He timed it perfectly because at that very moment a sweet Christian girl was there to hug me and tell me that weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in the morning. I needed some joy right about then.
As much as I hate to admit it, that comment has kept me quiet during my professional life. I’m an introvert by nature so I don’t readily voice my opinions. I feel I have to live up to that quote that says, “It’s better to remain quiet and be thought a fool then to speak up and remove all doubt.” I’ve been too afraid to speak up in case someone that my idea was “dumb”. That is the internal chatter that I battle still to this day.
Negative inside chatter sure does start early. Satan is working very hard to blind us and our children from the thoughts God has toward us. I already have began to teach my 7 year old daughter that when she thinks that she is a particular sin or fault, she must tell herself those are the thoughts the devil wants her to think and she must remind herself of the thoughts God has toward her; she is forgiven, loved, and she can overcome her shortcomings with God’s help. I remind her (and myself) that if we think we are our failures, we will stop trying to change the areas in our lives that need changing because we will always feel like we have already failed. We are holy and chosen and have so much hope!!
I’ve realized that sometimes the inside chatter of my life can keep me from moving forward and forgiving someone of an offense they may or may not even be aware of. I think most times what we “think” people are saying about us or why they did this or that isn’t even accurate. The longer I listen to the voice of the enemy instead of focusing on what Gods word says about who I am in spite of that situation, I lose focus of the bigger picture and begin to feel sorry for myself. The more I focus on the truth and cast down those thoughts, the more victorious and encouraged I feel. The word of God is alive and it is truth, the words of the enemy are destruction and lies. Remembering this encourages me to change what I’m thinking about and not allow the enemy to pump his garbage into my mind. I’m not a trash can 🙂
I’ve learned that “Inside Chatter” means that I am spending too much time relying on myself and not enough time relying on God. God said, “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?” (Luke 12:25 –NIV) and “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7 –NLT).
“I am the daughter of the Most High King.” When the world gets noisy, I try to remember this quote. The Lord is quick to remind me who I am through His eyes and I am grateful.
I had never addressed the “negative chatter” I tortured myself with until reading Lysa’s books. What a freedom and sense of victory I feel now each time I intentionally stop the chatter and replace it with scripture. It has transformed my spiritual walk and given me new insight into other relationships. As I struggle with situations and people my husband and I deal with in ministry, I have truly gained a new level of peace by eliminating the negative chatter. Thank you for allowing yourself to be used by God and for communicating to women in such a powerful and real way!
I must say, reading your blog post really spoke peace to my heart. I too was not the most popular person in school, and to this day, when others seem to have close conversations within earshot, but without me, it makes me question why. I question my friendships. Are they genuine, or do the others just humor me? I question my work environment. Am I really accepted or just a co-worker they would rather keep at a distance? God has placed wonderful Christian women in my life that reaffirm my place in God’s kingdom & their hearts. We all share freely without fear of retribution or judgment. With them, I know I can share the inside chatter & receive affirmation of who I really am … a child of God.
I’m going through a really tough time in my life right now and I came across this blog in an e mail just a few minutes ago and it really spoke to me. I’m finding out who my friends really are and am dealing with a ton of internal chatter. I’m one of those people who would rather have things said to my face no matter how hurtful they may be than to have things said about me behind my back. “Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of the situation.” That hit me like a ton of bricks and I feel like it was God ‘threw a brick at me’ and told me to open my eyes and just let it go. It’s not worth the time and energy to worry so much about what others think of you and I have to learn to just give all up to Him and surround myself with people that are going to pick me up when I’m down and be there with the support I deserve. Life is too short!
I struggle with the chatter, ie negative thoughts on a daily basis. I’m constantly asking God to lead me to better, more positive thoughts. My own personal struggle has to do with whether I’m a good enough mother and wife. I constantly doubt my reactions and responses. I think the most important thing is that I do look to Him to help me and correct me and to hush the ongoing chatter of my thoughts.
I hate inside chatter. It’s loud and it’s driving me crazy. I feel like I’m the only one who hears this chatter. Why is it in my head and how do I get it out? It feels like someone has been hired full time to sit in my brain and type these negative thoughts. I’m looking forward to the webcast and hopefully learning how to deal with this. I know God does not intend for me to deal with this everyday…..does he?
they (the cool girls) all got up and left the lunch table as soon as i sat down i never did find out why and at 51 i am still looking for acceptance and love. my inside chatter is you aren’t good enough, you are alone, you are nobody.
ugh, the inside chatter is my worst enemy.. I try to take captive every thought, but don’t always do so well..thanks for addressing this issue!!
Looking so forward to the webcast!! I have always struggled with my inside chatter! I am realizing that I am way too hard on myself! Now the most important thing for me is to try and teach my 13 year old daughter about her inside chatter. 🙂
My biggest inside chatter has been with relationships. Mostly with men. When I was a lil kid up to the point I moved out with just my Mom at eighteen, my Dad’s emotional distance and harsh demeanor really put an insecurity and fear within me. I always wanted to like “guy” things so my Dad would want to spend more time with me when I was growing up. I learned to like football, watch westerns and star wars, play sports, chess and learn poker. As, I am very much a lady now and still enjoy those “guy” things, at the time I was trying to approval seek.
This later leaked out into my last relationship of 8 years. I met this boy when I was 17. Because, of my Dad not being a healthy role model in my life, I didn’t know what real love from a man was like. Every time I wasn’t invited to do something with my boyfriend or his friends or anytime I saw a change in his attitude, I immediately thought it had something to do with “me.” I put my worth and value in how he would approve of me. From what I wore, to the style of my hair, to the “guy” things I would show him I liked to do. It was a form of mental manipulation I used to be someone’s “dream girl” to satisfy that longing of a man’s love and approval.
I later learned from God and his Word, that confidence and approval doesn’t come from others but, from Him. That the love God has for us to send his only begotten son to DIE on the cross to bare all our sins is the best love and approval anyone could ever ask for! God has been opening up my eye’s to what real love is. And it is one of the most rewarding lessons I have ever learned.
Hmm, when I was probably this girls age, the same things would happen to me. I was not “skinny”. My dad was “OCD”. My mom did not dress me “in style”. One thing led to another and these small situations led me to believe I was a horrible person so I turned to any eating disorder. In my mind, I thought people would like me if I was skinny. That was “inside chatter”. 10 yrs later, I am a recovering bulimic as of 3 weeks ago. Several years ago, someone told me that I’d never fully overcome this. That has been what I’ve believed for the past 3 weeks. I thought I would always have this struggle with food and I was going to always slip up until yesterday afternoon I ate something that tempted me then I saw on Proverbs 31 Facebook page “I cried out, “I am slipping!” but your unfailing love, O Lord, supported me. When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer.” Psalm 94:18-19 and I was okay and then following that I came across 1 John 5:4-5 at bible study.. “for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world? Only he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God.” My point is “inside chatter” can get you into some trouble if you let it. DON’T let it. As you can see, God always pulls through like He did for me yesterday. So when you have that negative inside chatter, you just have to give it up to God and find a way to glorify Him in the situation.
Inside chatter loves to creep up on me, telling me I don’t look pretty, my clothes aren’t nice enough, I am to tired to work out, to read my bible, etc… but the best thing that works for me at putting out this chatter is to ask God to reign in me, and start talking to myself in positive ways.
Thank you for all you do. Love your book Unglued, I am reading if with my small women’s bible study group at church. Thank you.
Oh Lysa, you must be inside my head! There has been a lot of chatter there lately… I took your devotional with me on my trip with my husband this last weekend to help quell the voices in my head so that we might have a nice time. It did help! But the chatter is back with a vengeance today. My friend and I are having a growth opportunity and it is tough. But I am so thankful to hear your words somewhere in the midst of all the voices “Is it important to be right? Or keep the relationship?” Thank you so much!
Lina
My inside chatter has always been that I am not good enough … not smart enough … not skinny enough … not pretty enough … not popular enough … not wanted … I know alot of this in later years has been because I have a difficult time verbalizing/conversing and it stems from my young years when it seems like no one cared what I had to say/share. To this day I still remain quite quiet and uninvolved with co-workers and church members.
I grew up with a very negative mom. I love her with all my heart but I have a hard time getting her voice out of my head. It is hard to be filled with joy and gratitude when you some how feel like you don’t deserve anything good in life. I am struggling right now with losing a large amount of weight. It is just the beginning of my journey but I am already struggling because I feel of all of the emotional issues it is bringing out. I hear that voice saying, “See, I told you you couldn’t do it.” “Why are you even bothering?” I am coming to grips that some of my weight issues if not all are emotional driven. Food was were I turned for comfort. It also was a way for me to keep people a way and a buffer for the pain. Thankfully, I am learning (slowly) that these lies were from satan and that the Heavenly Father loves me more than I can imagine. It is not easy to deal with those voices but he has amazing people to speak the truth into me. I have an amazing husband who is standing by me on this journey and who has loved me unconditional for almost 20 years. I have 2 amazing sons who love me and encourage me every day. Until I started this weight loss journey I never realized how much I was listening and believing the negative chatter in my head. Now that I know, I will be diving even deeper into God’s word so that I can battle that negative chatter with God’s word. God is good and I know he has plan for all of this. I can’t wait to see what it is.
I have felt left out or unimportant all day. This was wonderful to read…I should have read it much earlier! Thank you!
When I am rejected, I try to remember who I am in Christ. Then, I get in my secret place in God’s Word to find where my confidence should be since God is my Source; not my popularity, my bank account, or the things of this world. God loves me and never changes. Praise God!
it causes me to feel like I have to explain myself actions and words to people all the time.
“Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.” That’s a powerful and true statement! I’ve learned that “inside chatter” is unproductive and just a waste of time. I believed my negative thoughts far too long, but no longer!
I have allowed inside chatter to infiltrate my thoughts from time to time. What I do to conquer it is to picture myself by the edge of the ocean looking out onto a huge horizon. When I see myself, not from my own mind’s eye, but from God’s eye….then I realize how small I am and how big He is. And I remember that here on earth is not our home. Some day we will be home, and that negative chatter can no longer come. There is a lot to be said for thinking positive (we are what we think). When negative thoughts are born, I have to just force myself to re-think. I re-focus, re-energize, and re-start.
Your knowledge and heartfelt ability to share with all, delights my heart and I always feel lifted up closer with my walk with The Lord when I am reminded that there a lot of us out there that feel the same. A mother, grandmother, sister, friend, and servant guided by The Lord. Thank you for sharing with us
My inside chatter tends to vacillate between a prideful legalistic judgment of others and negative thoughts that harshly assess myself. Either way my inside chatter is rarely merciful.
I have found that inside chatter happens daily for me and if I just pray and focus on God’s promises it helps keep me focused. I even feel guilty at times because of this chatter. It is nothing more than the devil trying to break down the armor.
What you feel other people do to you or say about you bad enough, but when I allow the “inside chatter” to start to creep up & take over then it can be overwhelming! I can make senario’s that don’t even exist, the words & damage I do to myself is usually far worse than what I allowed someone else to do! I am thankful that Christ loves me through it all no matter what! I start my day thanking Him for His love, mercy & grace, and remind myself that I am a princess to Him!
The chatter inside my head tells me, “you’re not a good enough momma, wife, teacher, daughter, sister or friend. You’re not even a good enough Christian!” In response, I spin my wheels trying to prove to the world that I am good enough! This drives my depression leaving me hiding under the covers feeling hopeless, and I give up! It’s a nasty cycle! More times than not the Holy Spirit counter acts those ugly voices in my head! Thank you God!
Even though most of us have this negative “inner chatter” going on we still look outward and think other people’s lives are perfect and they are totally confident about who they are. It is so great to hear how normal or “abnormal” we all are, isn’t it great to find that others are as imperfect, scared, lonely and needy as we are. Not that I wish those negative emotions on anyone, but it’s good to know you aren’t alone. Thanks for helping us all remove the masks and humble ourselves before each other. It’s great to know I have so many “real friends” out there! Love yourselves ladies!!
I felt left out just last year when a group of co-workers went out for dinner after work and didn’t invite me. I felt like something was wrong with me.
I think that most women deal with this “Inside Chatter” on a daily basis and I’m excited that you and Sheila are going to address this topic in your webcast. I know that it is something that I find myself trying to work through and rationalize and make “ok”, but it’s always there. I’ve got some women from my bible study coming over so that we can view the webcast together! Looking very forward to it!
A reminder that we are all loved and worthy!Finding ways to self-sooth is important.
There is a devil out there who wants nothing more than to have us think we are worth nothing. He wants us to keep our minds full of “negative chatter”, pessimism and doubt. But I know that no matter what the devil tells us and no matter what others think of us, the only REALLY important opinion is that of our Father God and Brother Jesus. They love us SO MUCH. We are daughters of a KING!
“inner chatter” I think we have all been left out before. Sitting in a crowded room and nobody wants to talk to you. Stop and think. God made you. One of a kind. There are special things about all of us. We have to love ourselves first.
I am reading “Unglued” right now. I am loving it. It is so me! I saw your website in the back and searched it. I am so happy to find it. I enjoyed reading this page and would love to watch the webcast tomorrow but I am afraid I have prior responsibilities. I have had such a renewed feeling in my life even after being a third of the way in the book. I have to keep repeating to myself the quote you made on page 73. This has been a very difficult year in my life and I am afraid I have lost sight of what is important and it is me that has moved away from God. Thank You!!! You have been a blessing and what I have needed. My three children thank you also. I hope to be a more patient and focus mother.
My inside chatter? It has taken years to truly think with a straight mind….not one full of assumptions of what people are thinking or what their ‘true’ motivation is. Instead, as those kinds of thoughts creep up, I turn them into prayer…then God turns them into healing. All this negative chatter in my head is just evidence of where I am tryin to take control. It tells me how I haven’t let God take over….heal me.
Now I look forward to the times He points out my negative chatter. That means the healing will start, and peace will soon follow. Praise our God and King.
The “inner chatter”…..it is so believable. Good – Bad – True – Lies. It can take over your mind. You try to think positive. “OK, I’m going to be really organized and productive today. I can do this.” Then the negativity starts “No, I’m not that organized. I’m not good at it like Suzie Q.. Oh, she makes me sick.” It goes on and on. I’m not as _____________ as Suzie Q. You can fill in the blank with whatever “inner chatter” you are dealing with that day. Why do we obsess? Why do we believe the junk? We know God loves us. We know He created us. We know that we are princesses because we are daughters of the King. But, still yet, the “inner chatter” starts and you can’t find the off switch. I love the song “Lay it Down” by Jaci Velasquez. That’s what we need to do is LAY – IT – DOWN and open our hearts and minds and let good thoughts from God take over. Psalm 46:10 tells us “Be still and know that I am God.” Maybe when the “inner chatter” starts we just need to be still.
Good morning Rachel 🙂
Thank you for sharing that beautiful song. I looked it up on YouTube and listened to it several times. What a blessing.
In His Love,
Mear
I have to constantly remind myself that my identity needs to be in Christ and in him alone. I often forget and let my thoughts wander to what could be instead of focusing on what God desires of me right now…today. Although it is okay to dream and to pray for things to be different; I need to constantly remember that God has me right where he needs me and I need to be his hands and feet here before I can do anything else. He has and will continue to give me just what I need to accomplish his goals but it is so easy to focus on what I feel I can’t do or rather what I can’t do without God at the center instead of what I can do when I center myself on him and let him lead each step.
You have to constantly monitor your thoughts, every minute of every day. Stop a negative thought in its tracks and reprogram that thought. Easier said than done, I know.
Sometimes when I have those awful thoughts nagging at me, I have to say my King,s name out loud several times. He brings me back to His peace There is nothing as sweet as the name JESUS. I have to recognize that this pain draws me closer to Him!!
Just reading your post brought back a flood of memories and the chatter that is slowly fading…I’m not good enough…I don’t have anything to offer…what’s wrong with me…your post reminded me again that Jesus loves me and accepts me and rejoices over me with singing. I am convicted that I need to be careful with my own thoughts, words, and actions. Thank you!
Wow- I loved this post. Sometimes I catch myself mid chatter and think- when will this end? I am 43 years old and I still have the same voice that I heard when I was 13 telling me all that’s wrong with how I look, what I say etc. I know I need to focus on God and get my worth from being His creation but boy, is it hard!
My inside chatter usually starts with some insecurity or negative criticism that gets the ball rolling on many situations from the past that serve as reminders of failures, dashed hopes, unfulfilled expectations and often unrealistic ideas about what the truth may be. It is something that I am learning to nip in the bud by taking every thought captive and calling on the name of Jesus to help me change my attitude. When it is extreme or otherworldly from condemnation tht is not from The Lord, I claim the blood of Christ and pray for help. Victory then belongs to The Lord and all glory goes to Him. He never fails me!
When ever someone is pointing to my short comings in not such a nice way, I chant to myself, “it’s not me, it them’ it’s not me, it’s them.” Then I remember to tell myself that God loves no matter what others think.
Of course all of this arises probably from negative feelings as Lysa mentioned incidences in middle school. Amazing that grown women still hear the childhood mean girls in their ears years later.
I have learned that inside chatter is robbing me of the security that God intends for me and I MUST take action. I am so looking forward to the webcast to help me find the necessary tools to silence and reprogram this hurtful chatter that my mind has written a very unhealthy pathway for and replace it with truth and good mental health!
I think all of us experience this. Your not good enough, not like by the “cool” crowd, don’t have 1,000 FB friends. The list goes on and on. Even as an adult it still happens. Why? What I am learning is I don’t care what others think. The only one I live for is Christ. My verse for the year is Romans 12:2.
I’ve battled with “inside chatter” a lot. Why didn’t I get invited? Did I do something wrong? Often I’ve found that these thoughts were actually self-serving. I wanted to be wanted by the crowd. I could have been included, but chose not to be included because I didn’t receive a personal invitation. How selfish of me! Thankfully I serve a God who is bigger than these negative thoughts! It’s not all about me. Never has been, never will be. It’s all about HIM!
My negative thinking about myself comes way too easy and too often. I hope tomorrow night’s webcast will help me stop this.
Inside Chatter… My inside chatter has often allowed the outside chatter much more power than any person should ever have in my life. By surrendering to God ‘s voice and allowing his Word to envelope my mind and heart, I have been able to quiet that chatter and replace brokenness with a wholeness only He can bring.
Would love the free gift to enjoy and pass along to special women. 🙂
I have always battled this as long as I can remember.
Now I speak out loud (when I can) scripture to silence it, it is only by His Grace I am free.
Chosen.
What a powerful word. Yeah, I’ve been chosen for a few things…by my Father God… Not chosen for others…by my earthly father. CHOSEN. Sometimes the things I’m not chosen for lead to those things I’m meant to be chosen for. Doesn’t stop the chatter. However, I know who I am, I am a daughter of the King, and I CHOOSE to rest in that!
My life is full of these kind of examples, people not accepting me, being hurt, etc. But, then one day after being hurt so much, my dad gave me a one-liner that I have used for years that helped…..”if you don’t like it, don’t look.” That not only shut the kids up, but really boost my confidence. And, I eventually got to the point where I really didn’t care about them.
Often the inside chatter sounds like the droning of the worker bees with their negative thoughts buzzing inside my head–thoughts of how differently I see things, how I view the world in blacks & whites with few shades of gray, how in protecting my child from the world & keeping her holy & set apart, I am “crippling” her opportunities, how no one should want to do things “just because”, how I overdo to please husband, child, community, church & ultimately, Christ. In Christ only do I feel accepted & understood. I have to gain control & reduce the volume on the chatter!!!
A lot of my Inside Chatter is from being the uncoordinated “smart kid” in elementary/middle school but most of it stems from 20 years of verbal and emotional abuse. It is the filter that I run the things that happen to me through, and it forms my reactions to life events. It also helps me build up walls to keep the hurt out–walls that also block out the love, peace and joy of life and prevent me from living fully. I have to work on not listening to my Inside Chatter all the time.
I’ve had quite a bit of inside chatter in my life. I was so full of wounds from my childhood and beyond that I didn’t have a lot of peace in my life. Just to give one of way too many examples, in middle school I had a girl slap my face in front of what seemed to be half of the school. I barely even remember the amount of “chatter” that came from that encounter and it affected me deeply for a long time. I can’t even remember what I did to upset the girl, I just remember the initial moment and several moments right after the original horrifying moment!! I just knew half of the school thought I was such a huge loser!! I’m glad that God is a God that cares about the things that the enemy has stolen from us like the peace that comes from a quieted mind!! I’m glad that He has shut down a lot of chatter like that from my mind and healed me from the foundations up!! I’m glad I don’t have to place my identity in moments like those!! God is so good!! Thank you for the post and I pray you are blessed many times over for being such a blessing to others!! <3
I am 56 years old and I too have always heard the internal negative chatter and still do to this day. It has had a serious impact in life. Especially since my marriage of 25 years ended. I felt that I was never good enough and I was not enough. I am looking forward to the web cast. I need tools to help over come a lot of damage. Thank you for this opportunity.
Looking forward to this teaching! This is something I still struggle with & I’m ready to be free:)!
Looking forward to this teaching! This is something I still struggle with & I’m ready to be free:)!
There is POWER in the prayer, “Lord, don’t let me believe the lies of the enemy.”
Listening to christian music has really made a difference in my inside chatter. I am able to dwell on what is true, and right, and good because I can remember the words to a song that encourages and reminds me who God is in the midst of it all. I am thankful for the prevalence of Christian radio stations.
Uh…I am so guilty of letting this inside chatter pull me down. I give this chatter way too much attention in my head. I struggled with how to deal with this…. I am so excited to listen tomorrow.
Many times the inside chatter are all those voices that tell me I can’t do it, He doesn’t care, or I will fail. When they spring up sometimes it can be overwhelming and it is only through the bible verses that I have memorized that push the chatter out.
I currently am reading unglued and just had a conversation, well two, yesterday about the negative talk in my head. and that wasn’t the first time. I have been letting whether I am included, invited or chosen really dictate how I feel about myself. It’s been going on for a long time, but lately has really affected my relationships. I am learning that God defines who I am, not my failures, mistakes or feelings. I am asking God to give me the mind of Christ and to take captive those thoughts. I am loved, gifted and forgiven. I don’t need a man’t approval of me but God’s. Whether someone invites me , likes me, or not doesn’t define me, only God can do that.
The inside chatter sometimes makes things come out of my mouth that should never come out. I need to remember to let God influence my thoughts and speaking, and not that negative inside chatter.
In years past I listened more to,the loud roar that spewed barbed lies that I wasn’t smart, pretty, talented or rich enough. Or the alternative message that “I am too much!”Jesus has taken me on a journey to recognize that the roar is the lion who wants to devour my destiny. Determining within myself not to believe or participate in any inner chatter that compounds the ferocity of these messages that come meant for nothing less than to kill, steal or destroy myself worth, in any form, has allowed me to truly hear the sweet, confident sound of truth! The voice of reason has come as I have read and believed the truth of God’s word that is the only “chatter” to listen to! The Holy Spirit becomes louder as we ask Him to speak and take Him at His word.
I deal with inside chatter regularly, but I take a step back, most times, to re-evaluate with God the important chatter and the not so important chatter so that I can move on and get things done.
Even as an adult this is something I deal with daily.
Reading this brings me back to high school when as a shy teenager I had to find my own group and learn that with God in me no one could be above me. This helped through the years and grew my confidence in not myself but the fact I was never alone. Now 40+ years,later I do not have a problem being the director not included in the lunch outings. I know that I am exrptremely important in maintaining day to day operations. I look forward to some time alone with God to help me to know how to help others. Th e price of being part of the inner lunch circle is forgetting the value of a personal one-on-one relationship with God and letting the Holy Spirit work in me constantly.
Lysa,
Wow, I really needed to hear this today. I am in the middle of writing a memoir for one of my college classes, and this has been a struggle for me too. I have to write about defining moments, and it’s hard not to define who I am by what has happened in my life. But you’re right, our lives are so much bigger than the little moments we experience. Christ just uses these moments to shape us into who he made us to be. In Him, we are made whole!
I needed that today, Why do I allow those things to bother me. There are times I feel that way and have to stop and think, you are not in school anymore…. it shouldn’t matter!! Well I guess it does, my identity is not in what others think of me nor should I be concerned with what they think. In those times of my insecurities I need to allow God to show me that I am secure in Him and Him only.
When I doubt anything, my inside chatter seems to take over and convince me EVERYTHING is wrong. Little reminders how I didn’t do something the right way, fast enough, which leads to taking apart every little part of me. And then I get stuck, I dwell and dwell and dwell. Ironically, when I read my daily devotional the inside chatter is gone and doesn’t come back for quite a while……maybe I need to reread my devotions when I hear that chatter?
Being a stay at home mom, I have a LOT of time to think. Which alway allows my mind to begin over thinking everything and then enters the “inside chatter” of doubt. Although it still happens on occasion, I have really had to learn to not listen or take to heart that chatter or it will really affect my mood & day. It is definitely something that has to be prayed about often!
I am learning that entertaining the negative chatter is giving Satan free entry to wreck havoc. One insult leads to another and creates a domino effect that attempts to cause sinful reactions to try to soothe. It’s a constant battle that requires unceasing prayer!
Opening this post I never would have thought what was I going to read. Ever since I can remember I’ve been trying to get acceptance from my mother. I came a little earlier in her marriage than she expected and planned and she didn’t realize at the time it was not her who was writing the story. For almost three decades I try hard to get a compliment and encourgament or recognition that never came for me. The hard part was that my brother got all that plus hugs and kisses, not me. My inner chatter was (is?) you are still not good enough, you just have to try harder, be better, smarter, nicer, someday, someday…
That day came when I realized enough only came from someone other than me whose love helps to change my perception and inner chat everyday.
Lysa thank you for your reminder today!
I am learning to quiet that ugliness that says “you are not loved, never have been wanted and definetly are not worthy.” Hard to believe as I was born to a teen mom who wanted an abortion, have been divorced and now remarried working on forgiveness from adultery in this marriage…. I don’t usually FEEL loved, wanted or worthy. Yet, I am learning that I am invaluable, irreplaceable and of more owrth thatn I may ever truly understand. Today I chose to believe it…
I thought I was one of those “chosen” “accepted” “in” girls.
I worked sooooo hard to be accepted (too much work),
only to be left out over and over, yet accepted when someone
needed something I could do or give.
So many wasted years of feeling bad.
How wonderful to know, I am accepted in my Beloved.
I do not have to work or perform for HIM!!!!!
He loves me ! He loves me! He loves me!
These words I speak when the “negative” inside chatter tries its assault.
I desire to succeed more than retreat, and move forward through
Christ Jesus my Lord.
I have been doing this a LOT lately. The other day I actually stopped and asked myself, “who in the world are you talking to?” I had completely lost focus on the task at hand, and was dredging up negative feelings about another person by complaining about them in my head. This has GOT to stop! I really need some help with this!!!
I hate to even think about all the joys that I have missed because I let the inside chatter take over not only my mind but my emotions.
I’ve learned to not listen to the chatter and to replace it with God’s truth, (positive thoughts)
one thing God has impressed on my heart (because I have ALOT of negative inside chatter) I think I may have even read this in one of your devotionsls that if I didn’t hear someone say it, then I can’t assume they are thinking it! that has really freed me (along with lots of prayer) to not bw bogged down with self condeming thoughts that can so easily overtake my joy.
I’ve dealt with lots of “inside chatter” over the years. You’d think with age would come wisdom to discern the lies from the truth. Yet, some hurt from the past will surface and I apply it to the situation I’m currently in and all the self doubts, rejections, etc. begin to snowball. It’s such a great feeling knowing that I am valuable in Christ’s eye and that he loves me unconditionally. Time to look at life through his eyes not mine!
My “inside chatter” tells me my worth is performance-based. When I was in school, I was a good person when I got an A…worthless when I got a B. When I was dating, I was good when I made my boyfriend happy, worthless when we had an argument. Now that I’m grown, I feel like I’m only a good wife and mother when the house is clean, dinner is perfect, finances are in order, etc…and reality never seems to match that ideal! I try feeding myself with Scripture that tells me who I am in God’s eyes, but the chatter doesn’t stop, no matter how hard I try to believe the truth. It’s starting to affect my marriage, not to mention, my own happiness, and I’m worried what this will do to my son when he gets older. It needs to stop!
Growing up I was the unliked kid. By my family ppl at school, it just never ended. And now I am 25 and still unliked, I am about to married and my mother in law down right hates me. Says all kinds of nasty things like : youre fat, loose some weight, youre going to Hell bc you had a child out of wedlock, youre not good enough for my son he needs a thinner woman youre going to kill if you try to have a family…its just horrible…
Growing up i was molested for two long years, raped twice during my teen years, physically beaten by by my stepfather for 5 long horrific years while a teen and almost died. Lost my son in ’07 and f to this day still feel as if Im nothing.
Your books are so inspiring i just wish i could afford to read them. You are truly an amzing woman and I am glad God my Savior has brought you into my home and life, maybe now i can begin to heal.
my inner chatter is : youre not worth being alive
I’ve had this post sitting open on my desktop all day, but hadn’t had time to read until now (10:15 pm – after everyone else in the family has gone to bed). I guess God knew I would need to read it at the end of my day and not the beginning. I’ve had one of “those” mom days. My 2 year old bit my 3 year old twice then, after being put to bed, proceeded to scream and cry until she threw up. I was so tense that I had to put a heating pad on my neck and shoulders and let them watch more tv than usual. Definitely wasn’t feeling like mother of the year. I also have a 9 month old special needs child, and just last night, when I forgot to turn on her feeding pump until 1.5 hours after it was due, I made a frustrated comment under my breath that “You’ll never gain weight living in this house. No one does…but me.” My husband rolled his eyes at my comment (Yeah, I’m reading Made to Crave and trying to conquer this issue). What I thought but DIDN’T say out loud was, “I’m a horrible. I’m not good enough to be her mother. Surely God could have picked someone better – more qualified.” I know these are lies. I know that God gave her – all 3 of my children – to ME and to US for a purpose, and I’m grateful for the blessing. However, I know I’m certainly NOT the only mom who feels inadequate at times. Thankfully, I also know that since God gave me this job to do, he has also equipped me with the skills necessary to do it. I just have to use them…often with his help, but nonetheless, I must pick up my “tools” he has gifted me with and accept my FULLNESS IN CHRIST.
I’m so thankful that God’s grace is greater than my inside chatter! Thanks Lysa for that reminder!
I am so very grateful for the words of our Lord. He has a way of touching our hearts at just the right time through beautiful people like you…sharing from your heart. I have had to repeatedly remember who I am in Christ during those times of feeling very insignificant in the big world filled with so many people. It is definitely God, filling my heart with love for others, during those times when my heart is hurting so much with lonliness and feelings of rejection from others. Thank you for sharing from your heart!
This is a battle that I have experienced too much recently!! I find that asking God in the name of Jesus to take captive every thought is the key. It is an exhausting, unnecessary way of life!!! (or rather death!) Looking so forward to the webcast tomorrow night!
I didn’t realize so many of us have such strong, negative inside chatter. I kept that to myself, thinking that I shouldn’t bother others about my own self megative chatter, only to realize thru one of your readings that Satan was filling me with lies that I would humuliate myself if I ever shared that I had negative self chatter. I am just realizing I need to really spend more time in Gods word, learning his truths and taking ahold of this stronghold captive and rely on God’s daily word to help me STOP this negative chatter. So excited for tomorrows discussion
I remain amazed how similar virtually everyone’s experiences and reactions are, and how it happens to everyone regardless of their status – popular, smart, athletic – or not so much any of those. Situations with rejection and the resulting negative chatter in our heads seem to linger forever, and it takes work to keep the chatter down. I am even more amazed, to realize (intellectually) I am certain the event was a small moment, perhaps even an oversight on the other person’s part, I can still bring back the overwhelming pain, anger, shame, grief, years later. And that too brings more shame and uncertainty. Combined with the emotion telling me that no one else understands, and others’ lives are perfect (clearly God loves them more), it can be an ongoing battle to keep those feelings under control. C.S. Lewis could write a Screwtape book about this – with instructions to keep us too busy with the minutia of life, keep us off balance and unsure of ourselves with little “perceived catastrophes”, make us feel like God hates me because I was ___________fill in the blank______________.
It’s just a daily ,often minute by minute battle to stop the internal chatter of the what if I had or what if I hadn’t, could have been, shouldn’t have been…a daily, constant battle. Some things affect and change your life forever.
It is important for us, like it was Jesus, that we daily put on the whole armor of God. Even Jesus was tempted with lies by satan, but His #1 defense was the Word. If we are to shrug the enemies lies and doubt off, then it is essential for us to know what Truth says.
Although I fight the chatter in my head, my heart aches for my daughters when they get hurt by others and feel unworthy, not liked or accepted by others. Thank you for giving us the Word and your amazing books so we, too, can share with our daughters they are a part of something bigger than this world…they belong to Jesus and this world is not their home!
My inside chatter squashed my personality. I found myself lost in neighborhood drama and an inability to find myself in a place where I could just be ME. It took a trip to Africa with a wonderful group of strong Christian (Elevators) women for me to realize my personality could shine. I was so at ease with these women whom I had one main thing in common with, God. The best part….I am leading a small group with the neighborhood girls I struggled with. They saw the change in me and wanted to dive further into why and how my heart changed. God has blessed me with an incredible opportunity to be a light…I have seized the moment!! My chatter has silenced and when those feeling start to resurface I go straight to God. He knows me and he knows how to bring me peace.
my problem is I have numbed my inner chatter for years with food! My grandfather passed away last week and when I got the news I left work early. When I got home I mindlessly headed to the fridge; upon opening the refrigerator door the light inside went out, This was a sign from God, as if he was saying “the answer to your grief is not in here, this is a dark place.” I must remember to stay conscious, in the light, even during tough times.
Wow! The inside chatter is annoying all I can do is talk to myself more than listen to myself. I am in the unglued study now as I am 16 weeks pregnant with a toddler and my “Christian” husband has told me he doesn’t love me anymore. He ha left our home and now come back and the raw emotions of this is exhausting. I keep remembering though I am in this to make imperfect progress not perfection! I am in gods will and he will look after me and my two babies:)
I used to be plagued by inside chatter, negative self-talk, but over the past several years God has helped me to overcome the pattern that left me with depression for a number of years. I have slowly replaced the negative self-talk with truths I know from God’s word and with thankful praise of our wonderful God. God is good!
School had never been my joy. I just did not get it. The learning part anyway. I loved the people and recess. Recess was awesome! But reading, spelling and numbers eluded me for most of my elementary, middle schools high school… well you get the picture. I got by on my personality and to be honest cheating. It’s not that I did not try I would study for every test like that time would be different but it never was. My parents took me to all kind of learning specialists. In 8th grade I went through more testing and when I was done the evaluator said to me. You’ll be lucky if you make it through High School.
Well I made it! I Graduated from high school with lots of prays and tears. I graduated from collage and have done post graduate work. I combat inside chatter that says I’m not smart enough therefor I am not good enough by remembering Who’s I am. I am the child of an all knowing God I am his and He has seen me through High School, Collage and Post Graduate work. With out cheating 😉 Amen
My inside chatter was so loud in my head that I lost sense of who I was. God carried me through many trials while quieting the chatter and reminding me that being His child makes me an heir and valuable. Now I wrap myself in God’s love and understand that the world itself is conditional and fleeting.
I am quite accomplished at negative inner chatter. I picture it all bouncing around in my brain until it is so jumbled and twisted, I don’t even know what the words are anymore-just the resulting feeling of failing again. But if I get them out of my head through journaling or sharing w/a trusted friend, slowly the knots come out and I can look at or hear what I am really saying to myself. Then I can consider it, confront it, keep it or can it.
I have been dealing with inside chatter my whole life. It probably started in Kindergarten when I first felt rejected by a new girl that I wanted to be friends with. She chose to be friends with someone more popular than me. I need to constantly remember that Jesus has never rejected me, instead he has always been there for me.
A few things I do to stop the inside chatter, are to take every thought captive-is this thought from Christ or of the devil?-(2 Cor. 10:3-5) , to recognize the truth versus the lies in those thoughts, and then to claim my position with the help of Scripture. Revelation 12:11 says,”They overcame him (satan) by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony.” My testimony is that I belong to Jesus! Those thoughts don’t belong in a daughter of the King! I need a daily dose of Scripture to remind me of my position in Christ.
That no matter what anyone says I always know that God loves me and that’s the most important thing!
My inner chatter tends to focus on the negative – every disappointed hope is an absolutely crushing blow, every chilly comment is a personal attack. My inner chatter is a drama queen, who does not delight in truth or peace!
But my Jesus is bigger… His gentle love and quiet presence creates a barrier that the inner chatter cannot penetrate.
What I’ve been learning lately is that it is sooo important to fill my mind with God’s Word so that the chatter in my head is HIS truth instead of my imagination. The more I read His Word, sing His praises, and just talk to Him, the less time there is for me to be dwelling on the “what if’s” of life.
The last 2 and a half years have been very difficult, and a lot of that time was spent dealing with negative inside chatter. As things have improved, however, I have made it a point to try to make the inside chatter less negative and more positive. Trying to say “yes I can” instead of “no I can’t.” Saying meaningful words to myself, instead of demeaning ones. Conversations with my inner self, filled with negative chatter have been replaced with peaceful, thoughtful chats with God. I strive to “make a joyful noise (chatter) to him with songs of praise!”
I didn’t realize how much “negative inner chatter” I even HAD….until recently! I’m a 42 year old woman who has been separated from my husband for a year. I have always prided myself on my positive attitude and general upbeatness around other people–even been complemented on it! However, in the last several years, God has brought to my attention, more than once, the negative chatter that goes on in my own mind ABOUT myself! Just last Saturday I was sitting in a teacher’s workshop and learning some FABULOUS stuff to take back to my classroom on Monday (today), when I caught myself in a melancholy sort of mood. I made myself stop and really “feel” what I was feeling and name it….and then I HEARD IT! “You are a failure as a teacher! Why haven’t you been doing these things in YOUR classroom?! No wonder the kids are acting up, you are NO FUN!”…Oh, my my!!! What a MESS I am! Oops, see, even do it while typing this! I WANT to change my self-talk! I want to be what and whom GOD intended me to be! Can’t wait for the Webcast! I NEED IT!
I remember those days in high school when I never felt good enough to belong. Even at 40, my feelings get hurt when at work “the girls” go to lunch and I don’t get an invite. Hope and pray I am able to teach my daughter how to deal with that “inner chatter”.
Be careful listening to inside chatter. Bring it to God and ask him for his guidance.
I have dealt with negative inside chatter all my life. Unfortunately I grew in a house that showed love, but not always in the best ways. There was a LOT of negativity and that crept into my thoughts and shaped my way of thinking. However, I have been blessed because God has thrown people in my path at various points to help me combat this chatter. I’m still working on it and striving to find my identity in Christ rather than the words that have been thrown at me and that I’ve created.
My inside chatter tells me I am unworthy. I have always had a scarred imagine of what a father is and this kept me from seeing God for who He is. I am now opening my eyes and realizing how amazing He is but my inside chatter constantly tells me I am unworthy. I give these thoughts to God. I know God loves me and I love God. I struggle with the sense of being unworthy in my appearance , attitude, and I need to focus more on God and not this inside chatter. I love this story and the responses. It’s good to read I am not alone with this negative inside chatter!
I’ve realized that sometimes the inside chatter of my life can keep me from moving forward and forgiving someone of an offense they may or may not even be aware of. I think most times what we “think” people are saying about us or why they did this or that isn’t even accurate. The longer I listen to the voice of the enemy instead of focusing on what Gods word says about who I am in spite of that situation, I lose focus of the bigger picture and begin to feel sorry for myself. The more I focus on the truth and cast down those thoughts, the more victorious and encouraged I feel. The word of God is alive and it is truth, the words of the enemy are destruction and lies. Remembering this encourages me to change what I’m thinking about and not allow the enemy to pump his garbage into my mind. I’m not a trash can.
The inside chatter for me is feelings of not being able to measure up to the “beautiful and skinny” women who flood the media today! As my husband and I work through some issues in our marriage, I find myself full of anxious and fear chatter instead of focusing on what is true, noble, and just!
I have always felt left out , ever since I was little. I was the baby of the family of two older siblings until my little brother came along but I was always the tag a long or I felt I have always had to invite myself to things or invite friends to go shop or whatever. Just once I wanted to be invited or feel uncluded . I remember telling my Dad that a few years ago, before he pased away & he said it was that way for him his whole life that he had to initiate things so then I didn’t feel so bad & I finally realized God is with me all the time & loves me no matter what. I still struggle feeling that way sometimes so I’m looking forward to your webcast. Thank you for being such a blessing to so many women. We are blessed that you even care !
I have been a wallflower a good portion of my life. What I am realizing is that it IS inside chatter…. Why would anyone wanna talk to me? I don’t have anything important to say, blah blah blah! Now, as I’ve gotten older (51) I have realized that my facial expression isn’t always inviting. I think because of that negative inside chatter. So, if I can remember to put a smile in my face, (that part is in my control) then maybe people would be more likely to approach me! It usually works if I remember to do it!
A friend emailed me this very timely teaching. I saw myself in this story of the invitation to the party as I was never invited to any parties as a girl. I wondered if I had the same chatter and I realized mine had been worse and constant. God has been revealing them to me lately and showing me how to gently stop them. He has used friends in my life now to speak truth and love not allowing me to stay in the chatter. Yesterday i attended a surprise birthday party and was overwhelmed by the love of friends and brothers and sisters in Christ. It was so awesome and it was for me. My birthday is January 29th and I turn 60. I was terrified of this day until God gently showed me the love he has brought into my life. A love I never thought possible. That hurt and abused little girl is now God’s princess surrounded by the most beautiful friends and family who have shown her how incredibly loved she isby her Lord and Saviour, It is a birthday I will always cherish.
Thank you for your wonderful website. God is using you to reach many.
I have had the inside chatter a lot lately. I’ve been feeling depressed about spending some much time at home and none one ever inviting me to do anything. Then I try to reach out to someone but it’s not always the right way, like say on FB, and it doesn’t get seen, so I in turn think they are ignoring me. I even broke down and asked hubs one day if I was boring. He pointed out that it’s a two way street and I do need to stop thinking that everyone is ignorning me because maybe they think the same of me. And if I can make the effort then hopefully this depression will subside some and I can stop staring at my walls.
In the past, I allowed that “inside chatter” to cultivate self-hatred. I wasted too many hours hating myself for not being “enough”….but God has been so faithful to heal me.
Not that I am “cured” from that disease, but the symptoms have significantly decreased, and I now know how to treat the flare-ups!
I would LOVE one of those awesome bags too!! 🙂
As I take notice of my inner thoughts, I am shocked at how often the negative chatter weaves itself into my everyday thought process. It had become such a part of my “norm” that I didn’t even realize I was doing it at times. A sad and startling realization, but also a wonderful step forward in my transparency in Christ.
I have learned that inside chatter is my enemy! I have felt unimportant and that I don’t measure up to society’s ideals of what is “acceptable”, when what I should remember is that I am important and I am somebody simply because I am a child of God!
My inside chatter tells me that I’m a failure homeschooling and being a Mom for my seven. It tells me that I’m not doing anything well. There are too many things to be done to do any of them well. Well, God has helped me tune out the voices from the inside, and listen when he tells me that HE gave me this role. These seven kids. This homeschooling life. He’s got this in the bag. I need to tune in HIS voice. And he makes me able.
The inside chatter is always worse when my priorities are out of line. If I can stay focused on Truth & keep myself in the Word & in prayer consistently, listening to praise music thru the day, praying when the doubts begin, the inside chatter tends to be less insistent & easier to push aside. When I get too busy & start putting other things ahead of my relationship with the Lord, the chatter gets louder & has a lot more control over my emotions & attitude.
If I have given the fullness of Chris, and I andestand that, but I’m not livinig it, probable is just information in my head, that is not coming down to my heart, and Im listening the enemies chatter that is telling me you are ofended, and there is no way you matter. The enemy uses ofense to kill our joy, and our communion with The Lord and people who surround us. The trials and tribulationes help us to keep the eyes on The Lord. Remember He was rejected first.
You have to learn not to let the inner negative voice get the best of you. Lean on God and He will get you through the storm.
I have learned the hard way that inside chatter can destroy the true you. I have missed many fun opportunities because of inside chatter. The last straw was last July when I almost allowed inside chatter to end my life. I still struggle daily with inside chatter, but I am working on positive ways with my psychologist to overcome this destructive inner force.
The inside chatter is ever present in my life after several situations growing up. But what I’ve come to discover lately is that some of it is nothing more than a habit. I’ve somehow trained my brain to think negatively. I can feel myself slouch, I start listening to slow songs and I allow myself to marinate in self pity. But every once in awhile, I catch myself. I sit up straight, change the radio to something fun and speak words of kindness to myself. My prayer is that will become my new habit.
Inside chatter has been my worst enemy for the last year. I really didn’t deal with it in school but have found in the last couple of years that adult women can be worse than teenage girls. I’m trying to deal with being on the outskirts of friendships that I use to be in. God moved me into a alone spot to show me things and I became the bad person. I became the outcast of the group and still am. I just pray God shows me how to overlook the chatter and walk in his faith that I know I can.
So I have chosen to take the way they have made me feel as my thoughts. I’m always on the defense because I believe they are talking about me. But I think that I’ve been so use to it that my mind is so trained to think that!
My mom once told a group of her friends, right in front of my sister and me, that her children had no personality. At the time I didn’t know what personality was, but I cringed from my mother’s tone. It’s been a long journey through self-doubt and insecurities to realize that I DO have a personality! God made me who I am. Sometimes I’m quiet. Offer times I let loose a bit, but my personality is unique and God-made. He created me and I want to honor Him with my life.
It is so nice to hear other women face the same issues-letting the chatter in our head mess with us. My divorce does not define me! Being a single Mom does not define me! Cancer does not define me! My identity is NOT defined by past circumstances. Amen!
The thing about inside chatter is not only realizing the lies, but taking them captive and replacing them with the word of God and the truth. This is so difficult to do sometimes since we don’t even realize what is going on. We MUST place our worth in Christ and tell ourselves how much we are loved and surround ourselves with people that tell us that and then the liesi begin to stand out. Scripture is so important and powerful!
I can’t remember any of my adult life without inside chatter. It’s constant! I have had counsling over the matter, and have now over the last few years been able to control it and reject it, and then praise God for all He has blessed me with and for the person He has made me! I can’t wait for the webcast!
I recently lost my 6 month old son due to complications of RSV. And inner chatter was getting unbearable… Coulda woulda shoulda but there are more moments of peace and silence thankfully the last few days as God has been healing my heart and filling it with joy again.
Oh, how I hope you are enjoying reading all these posts. There are over 1600 right now! Wow. Crazy. At least you know you’re definitely loved and appreciated. I have always struggled with negative chatter. There were many pains inflicted by so called friends when I was a young girl. I’ve struggled with self worth and fear (in many forms). When I was in college, a friend made a beautiful, hand painted, picture with Phil 4:8 inscribed. Woven in that beautiful verse is my name. I have often reflected on that treasured piece of art in wonder and amazement that the Lord specifically gave her that verse for me knowing that would be a life verse I needed.
I’m so bone weary of the negative chatter in my head. It pushes me further and further away from God’s voice. It makes me lonely and isolated and some days it consumes me. It causes me to run laps in my mind about how I’m a loser because I can’t perform better.
I’ve learned that it is the same lies that I tend to fall for on a repeated basis. Someone can say any of a number of things to/ about me but there are a certain few that I fall for *almost* every time:
“You aren’t good enough”
“You’re unlovable”
“No one really cares what you say/ think/ do.”
But I am learning to (and trying to practice) fight these lies early on, when they first arise, with God’s truth. After all, who knows me and my heart better than the One who created me? 🙂
Thank you so much for sharing this. Battling inside chatter is a daily challenge but it has gotten better. I have had to commit myself to holding on to scripture that demolishes the arguments/negativity/insecurities that like to play games with my heart. I AM CHOSEN and that’s what defines me…not past and/or present mistakes. Thank goodness for grace!!
My inside chatter has always been ”I’m not good enough.” I will always be alone and what I say doesn’t matter to anyone.” As I sit here and analyze my life, I have come to learn that what others think of me shouldn’t have an impact of how I feel about myself. Knowing that my Father in heaven Loves me for Me and who I am, should be enough, but I have my moments that I don’t. The enemy has done all he can to fill my thoughts with negative emotions of rejection. I will continue to trust God and put my confidence in Him and only Him who loves me unconditionally.
I have definitely learnt about the Inside Chatter in my life..I have always felt that I am never good enough to fit in with the “popular girls”
I now know that in Christ I am perfect, I am his popular girl and what he thinks of me is all that matters.
I belong to him, so if I am not part of a group or event, I try not to take it personally and know that it is not me or my fault!!!
During my weakest moments I often hear the words of my mother from when I was a child telling me that I would never amount to anything and that no man would ever want me. I bought into these words until recently. I now start praying when these words come to mind and think of what God has planned for which is eternal life with Him!
I learned that when the chatter in my head turns int the negative destructive talk it means i have let my focus stray off the Lord. He provides chatter of love, encouragement, and grace. When I start hearing (and accepting) the negative, I know I need more time spent with the Lover of my Soul!
I’ve learned that it doesn’t matter what others think or say or whether I’m included down here. I KNOW I’m in God’s Heavenly number and He has a place for me. I’ve been learning to shift my focus to Him. He provides the fulfillment I seek!
I’m so glad I heard about this webcast!! I’m a wife and mother of 4 (ages 8, 6, 4, and 5 weeks). Most days I get so busy that the inside chatter is normal in my life – I’m so used to hearing I don’t bother to crush it! I don’t even realize all the negativity that I’m not only hurting myself with but my family with as well!! One thing I know for sure – words and thoughts have power!! Unfortunately – I forget to pay attention to the words and thoughts that I’m giving power to!!!
! I’m a wife and mother of 4 (ages 8, 6, 4, and 5 weeks). Most days I get so busy that the inside chatter is normal in my life – I’m so used to hearing I don’t bother to crush it! I don’t even realize all the negativity that I’m not only hurting myself with but my family with as well!! One thing I know for sure – words and thoughts have power!! Unfortunately – I forget to pay attention to the words and thoughts that I’m giving power
It is encouraging for such honest and practical insight and advise. Look forward to call tonight….
I’ve recently realized that the negative self-talk that’s been going on for what seems like my whole life has really crippled me in so many areas it’s hard to wrap my mind around. I’m trying to take baby steps to change these life long habits and break some cycles and do it differently with my kids before I don’t have an impact on their lives anymore. I’m a huge reader & info gatherer and can’t wait to see your webcast tonight!
Is it negative chatter if every time I tried to post yesterday it said failed, try again?lol
When I graduated from veterinary school, many clients told me I looked too young to be doing this. Quite a blow to one’s fragile confidence. At the time I was not a believer, it might have been easier with Christ. But now I know Christ and I know that He loves me and I must treat others as He does, with love and grace. Some days are just better than others.
It only matters what God thinks!!!! It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. I know that is easier said that done/felt. Just think…..looking back at the times I let someone hurt me with words or actions…..all the time I spent worried about it, I should have spent praying about it. Asking God to heal my broken spirit, asking God for encouragement, thanking him for loving me no matter what, thanking him for GRACE. Yes, so pray pray pray!!!!!
My inside chatter tells me that I’m a failure in home-schooling. It tells me that I’m not doing enough and that my daughter is missing out. While God has helped me tune out most voices in my head, I do still tend to struggle with some that creep through. I just need to learn how to tune in to HIS voice more, trust in Him that he’s got this, and to just let Him be the one that’s totally in control of my life and everything that I do instead of letting all the chatter get the best of me.
My inside chatter has been my worst enemy and has defeated me on many levels.
I still struggle with this inside chatter as an adult. Even after reading this book, that ugly voice pops up in my mind. I call it what it is, ugly lies from the biggest of them all, Satan. He does try to use this in my relationships, I know he comes to kill and destroy any that I have, I pray and God replaces those feelings of rejection with love unconditional, I am reminded of who I am in Christ. I belong to him, so I much reject and take captive those ugly thoughts…it’s a new day and I am a new creature in Christ, whom he loves enough to die for. Praise God for the great things he has done each day! Thank you for helping me replace negative with positive . Dawn
I had been doing better with my inside chatter, but my mother managed to do something to set it in motion again. I know you shouldn’t let others affect you like this , but I think it is going to take God some time to fix this one.
Like a lot of things in life, I thought I was alone with this challenge. Wonderful to know, I can’t wait to hear some of your techniques to stop or change this pattern from the devil.
I think that, as with all struggles, you first have to learn you have that struggle. Once you know it is there you pray that God would help you to recognize it each time it appears, as it appears, if you intentionally go to The Lord and pray you are actually being brought closer to The Lord rather than farther away! I believe that the enemy’s intentions are to drag us down and draw us away from our loving Savior, and once he sees that it creates the opposite of what he intended he will stop attacking us in that way… And try to find other areas that he can tear us down.
I was the only girl in my circle of friends who wasn’t invited to a party at a “rich girls” house in 5th grade. I was so embarrassed. Years later I have learned that when hosting an event it’s important to invite everyone, even those you are sure won’t come. They will have felt included and it only took you the time spent on the invite to not hurt feelings.
That inner chatter is most often everything I should not be listening to, and graciously and faithfully, the Holy Spirit prompts me to recognize it and rebuke it. Sometimes the chatter needs only for me to remind myself of who I am.. a child of the King, a precious daughter, and that no one, save Jesus, has the right to condemn me… and He has died for me. It’s almost like a “SO THERE” from middle school. But the credit is not mine, ever. It is the power of God and HIS faithfulness that is able to interrupt those thoughts and take them captive. I am surprised, still, at how the enemy continues to use this, and am always relieved, renewed, refreshed when, more and more quickly and surely, I call on the name of Jesus to keep this inner chatter from being able to make me come unglued :). There are still things, of course, and I know that as I seek, my God grows and grows. Thank you for your testimony, and the opportunity to share.
“Inside chatter” has to be compared and replaced with what Gods word says about me..I’m just starting to attempt to do this..and it’s definitely more imperfect progress on my part..however, I’m trying..I no longer want this “inside chatter” to dictate how I think,act & feel about myself..
I have found that inside chatter can rob me of the life that God intends for me to have. I have to remind myself that it’s all about him. We were made by him, for him and his glory. We need to keep our focus on him and not on ourselves or anyone else. Satan will attack us where we are the weakest and for me inside chatter has many times consumed me and almost destroyed me.
Whatever controls us is our lord. The person who seeks power is controlled by power. The person who seeks acceptance is controlled by the people he or she wants to please. We do not control ourselves. We are controlled by The Lord of our lives! Lord control our godless inside chatter!
This message touches us so deeply as we currently struggle with teaching this message to our 12 year old. Trying to show her that God’s love is all she will ever need is sometimes challenged by those “mean” girls at school that try to make her believe they have power over her. Thank you-
I have found tht there is nothing like replacing the inside chatter of lies and untruths with God’s true Word that literally transforms my mind. I have found that scripture memory is an invaluable tool in filling my mind with the Truth. I can then have the Word with me wherever I go and truly meditate on it day and night. It is challenging but oh so worth it!
I was adopted into a white family at age 5 ( I am native) I never fit into any cliques during my schooling. I wasn’t Native because I was in a white family and I wasn’t White because I was Native. I never fit in anywhere and even tho today I am almost 39 I don’t have alot of friends because I still have in my mind that I’ll NEVER belong to any kind of group. I am hoping that I will learn something tonight during the webcast 🙂
Oh the inside chatter! It was hard to see in the moments, the situations that seemed so large at the time, that it was not a defining moment. As I’ve gotten older and had a few life lessons of my own, I’m able to look beyond and realize its small in comparison. I pray daily that I’m able to teach my daughter and show by example. I know she’s going to have her moments and her own life lessons, but I’m thrilled to be able to walk beside her and use those moments as teachable moments. I look forward to tonight’s webcast!
I was never one of the “pretty girls” and that placed a negative impact on my life. I spent a great majority of my life trying to impressive others by doing all I could to make them like me. I jumped through hoops, bent over backward and forward in an effort to be one of the in crowd. Until one day God showed me the truth – don’t put your confidence in man,for he has feet of clay. It has taken some time but now my first thought is, will what I do bring glory to God. Now my focus is on doing everything as unto the Lord and not being a “men pleaser”.
Thank you for your daily devotion, for being real and for the encouragement.
Inside chatter leaves me saying the right things on the outside but all the wrong things on the inside. Sadly, the more I allow these thoughts to reign in my mind the harder it gets to keep them from slipping out in a time of conflict. Then comes regret…
I was on e told that “If you believe you can or you believe you can’t; your right”. This has challenged me to tackle the inside chatter that I have that tells me “I can’t” because maybe that is all that is stopping me from being successful. I am really looking forward to the webinar on Inside Chatter.
The negative inside chatter holds me back in developing Godly relationships. I am convinced it is the enemy trying to bring me down and away from Christ. I struggle with negative inside chatter daily but at the end of the day, my God is STRONGER & my God is BIGGER!
My inside chatter is “you don’t belong”. I was adopted at 8 days old. I remember by the time I was 3-4 y.o. the whispers behind my mother’s back. I was fortunate to have been brought up I a Christian home. By the time I was 6 I knew the “whispers” didn’t matter, they still hurt, but they didn’t matter because I belonged to Christ. So I learned at an early age to run underneath His shelter.
Eight years ago my husband left me for a much younger woman. I was 37 years old and in the best shape of my life. I had two beautiful children and a successful career. My Christian walk was strong and I was happier than ever. Then the words no one should ever hear…”I want someone who looks good on my arm when I go places.” I was devastated. Those words reduced me to nothing as I believed it. From that point on I didn’t believe that I measured up in any area of my life. It took God forcing me to rely solely on Him for healing. It took seven years to undo the damage and seven years of sitting home alone for God to restore my broken heart. Now God has blessed me with an incredible husband who has no problems reassuring me and reminding me who I am and whose I am everyday. I am a daughter of a King.
Negative chatter has kept me in bondage for many years of my life! It has worked to destroy my confidence, my intelligence, my gifts, my freedom, and worst of all my identity in Christ. The negative thoughts are what keep us from stepping out when God gives us an opportunity. They are what keeps us from sitting at the King’s table!! I am very excited to watch the webcast tonight, and I thank you in advance for helping to equip me (and other women) to be able to fight Satan when he attacks with this negative chatter in our lives!!
I have been dealing with negative chatter since childhood as well..I was overweight and kids called me phant…short for elephant…ugh…I fixed that by becoming anorexic…I listened to the chatter in my head saying that I was not good enough, which led to you’re not smart enough. That was followed by you aren’t pretty enough, you’re not a good friend or daughter…the list simply goes on and gets uglier until I began apologizing for my existence. When I invited Christ into my heart some of that dissipated…it did not disappear…just lingered…It is all truly a battle….but I have learned some things along the way….For example…”it is none of my business what anyone else thinks of me.”…& “expectation is the death of serenity.”…but most of all I simply try to remember that my God is bigger than anything…He never promised easy…He just promised He would never leave our sides.Amen!!!
I would have to say my inside chatter is I will never fit in. They won’t like you so don’t even bother trying.
Inside chatter often followed outside chatter for me. As a young girl I battled body image, being overweight and feeling worthy of love. There were a group of boys I attended school with who became young men in the process of our elementary, middle and high school years together. They were popular. They were liked. But they were full of hurtful chatter.
For several years, off and on, for reasons I still don’t know, they made comments about my appearance, my clothes, my size. They called me names. They whispered about me.
What they didn’t know was their outside chatter was fueling my inside chatter and eventually turned it into a raging fire for many years. It was all I could do some days to not cover my ears so that I could block out their chatter, and maybe soften my own. They had no idea that my inside chatter was nearly deafening theirs.
Interestingly, by the time high school rolled around I was friends with the “popular” crowd mainly because of my being a part of our school’s dance team. And because of all the dancing, I ended up with a much healthier body size and body image. Did it make a difference with the chatter? Nope.
Now as a saved-by-grace woman of faith, I still have moments where I hear the dialogue (internal and external) from all those years ago. And I have learned they are both the voice of the enemy trying to recapture my attention away from my loving God. See, the enemy kept me focused on ME for years with all the inside chatter. And kept me focused on very external things. Very temporary things. Now I know where my identity is: in Christ. I know that Jeremiah 29:11 is very much a promise for me as it was for the people of Israel. I know that “I am fearfully and wonderfully made”. I know that like Joseph, God can use what’s intended for evil and make it very good (I’m a certified personal trainer now, ha!). I KNOW these things to be true. Because they are from God’s word and His interaction with me and many others throughout history.
Do I have down moments when I let the chatter run wild? Some days, yes. But they are very much fewer and far between. And they are always when I’ve not been spending time in God’s word.
Thankfully, and by God’s grace, my inside chatter is filled with His promises and truths that combat any other external or inside chatter that the enemy may send my way.
Ready to quiet some of these thoughts in my head!!!
I have a life time of negative chatter. You aren’t love, wanted, needed, good enough. This past year I’ve started to learn who my Father is and who I am in Him. I made a list of all the descriptions of Him I found in Psalms and meditated on those character traits. I also made a list of lies I’ve played in my head and scripture to combat them. When I hear ‘you are a failure” I say “No, I am more than a conqueror in Christ Jesus”. When I hear “no one loves you.” I play the message that my Savior has “loved with an everlasting love” and that God is love. Replacing the negative chatter with God’s word has been powerfully life changing
My inside chatter can be quite disruptive and negative. It usually erupts when things aren’t going as planned and I’m tired or not feeling well. God is good… we’re working on it. I’m not sure it will ever quite go away, but episodes are much less often. Praise God!
My inside chatter is “she is a fat white trash bitch”. My fellow workers I just to work with would say about me when they didnt think I could hear. My husband saying “I am mental”. I have to remind myself daily who I am in Christ snd that He loves me unconditionally. That I am more than a conqueror. That I was made in His image.
My whole life I have struggled with feelings of inadequacy and pessimism. I am an extremely shy person, and therefore find it very challenging to make friends, fit into a group, express emotions and feelings etc. I’ve grown up wishing I was more “normal” and could enjoy life like others. My inside chatter has been focused on stuff like “I will never fit in”, “life is too difficult”, “I will never be able to enjoy life like other normal people” and so on.
It is only very recently that the truth of who I am in God really struck me, and I am gradually trying to reverse all these negative thought patterns through His help and instead embrace and cling onto all of His wonderful promises. Therefore, I am looking forward very much to this webcast, and know that God will bless me and so many others through it.
My inside chatter is “she is a fat white trash —“. My fellow workers I just to work with would say about me when they didnt think I could hear. My husband saying “I am mental”. I have to remind myself daily who I am in Christ snd that He loves me unconditionally. That I am more than a conqueror. That I was made in His image.
Inner chatter its a problem got me st present but one I’m working on. Thankfully, the Lord is with me and is my cheerleader. 🙂 Memorizing Scripture about my identity in Christ and then
applying it is the best weapon against my inner chatter.
remembering it
My inside chatter is “she is a fat white trash —“. Those that I used to work with would say about me when they didnt think I could hear. My husband saying “I am mental”. I have to remind myself daily who I am in Christ snd that He loves me unconditionally. That I am more than a conqueror. That I was made in His image.
My inside chatter is “she is a fat white trash —“. Those that I used to work with would say about me when they didnt think I could hear. My husband saying “I am mental”. I have to remind myself daily who I am in Christ and that He loves me unconditionally.
Growing up in a non-believing family with a emotionally dead-beat, dysfunctional earthly father made my adolescent “inside chatter” run wild! Sadly, at 31, it still has an effect on my Believing soul. Crazy how one person can have such an impact on your life as a little girl and on up to womanhood. The one big difference is that my heavenly father has given me the confidence and strength lacked as a child/ adolescent and healed my unloved spirit so most of my “inside chatter” that I have now is just silly, mama-drama :)!
My inner voice battle tells me I am never “doing enough” and will never “fit in”. This article reminds me that it isn’t up to mean to earn acceptance- Christ in me has already justified me. Thank you Lisa and all the Proverbs 31 writers. Your encouragement and addressing the real day to day issues we all face are such a blessing.
I confess many times I let small moments define me in a negative way-by being over-sensitive to comments and actions of others, and by being over-critical of myself and others. I need the constant reminder that I am loved and precious in HIS sight. Thank you for reminding me of this!
My inside chatter was I will never fit in…as a teenager it was so hard in high school to be part of the “in” crowd for being a christian. I just never seemed to fit in and it was made a point. Until one day my christian friend Angie told me it doesn’t matter what they think about me, it matters that God loves me no matter what! He’s the one that has everlasting love for me. She also told me to replace all the negative with His word. Thanks to such a great friend for helping me through a time I thought I needed to fit in when it didn’t matter…I fit in with God!
I have such low self esteem..my inside chatter is horrible…I want to have and give unconditional love like My Heavenly Father.
I am amazed at how we all seem to be struggling with inside chatter….feelings of shame, guilt, worthlessness, and fear dominated my life for so many years that all I could hear was the inside chatter. Much of the chatter was me trying to “change” bad situations that had already happened….like my father really wasn’t an alcoholic….like my parents really didn’t get a divorce….like the “in” crowd didn’t really leave me out! I would play the scenes over and over in my mind trying to make everything have a positive outcome. Inside chatter can be such a stronghold! It wasn’t until I began memorizing Scripture and began speaking it in my mind when the negative chatter started that I began to be healed.
Over the past few months, the Lord has been revealing to me that I casted away my confidence in Him. I allowed the “inner chatter” to push me to the point where I no longer focused on what God has equipped me with, but on rather what I was “lacking.”I have been gifted with musical abilities, but got so focused on “me” and what I “lacked,” that I became so timid and fearful to share the gift God entrusted me with. I’m so grateful that our Heavenly Father is longsuffering to us….and is not willing for any of us to perish-mentally, spiritually or even physically, and He pushed through my insecurities and loved on me through His word, my sisters in Christ and my husband.
God’s timing is perfect….that you for sharing and being willing to be transparent with us!
My inside chatter usually is “you don’t fit in here” or “what in the world are you thinking” and on and on…I have learned and have sometimes have to daily remind myself the difference between the Devils condemnation and God’s showing me where to confess. God doesn’t condemn us. He helps show us where we got off the right path and how to restore us. The devil will always try to condemn us and bring us down. We must focus on the facts and on God’s truth. He loves us and wants the best for us always!
My inside chatter is mostly about not being accepted….rejected and unwanted, not fitting in nor having friends. I have learned to combat these negative thoughts with Scripture… lately Zephaniah 3:17 gives me hope and the acceptance I need. God is my refuge and strength, a very present help in times of need, and when negative chatter starts in my mind, He’s there when I turn to Him!
I’ve learned that my inside chatter is one of the surest ways that Satan can use to defeat me. And, that I have the power to CHOOSE the chatter I listen to. For every negative thought about myself, there is a scripture of TRUTH that I can use to refute it. My personal fav- “As you come to him, a living stone, rejected by men but in God’s sight precious and chosen” 1 Pet 2:4. Memorizing scripture (writing it on my heart and it doesn’t have to be word for word perfect) is one of the most effective weapons, possibly the most effective weapon, in this war.
Inside chatter has left a negative impact on my life its damaging and hurtful
My inside chatter is you are overweight, getting wrinkles, and do not look good. Your husband does not desire you. You do not have any friends. You have isolated yourself and your high school and college friends do not socialize with you. The women at church feel awkward around you. But the truth, the voice of God usually wins out by letting me know that I loved by Him. I find peace when I surrender to him daily and allow him to lavish his love on me.
One very important thing I have learned about inside chatter is that I don’t have to listen to it. I need to think about what I’ve been thinking about and then take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ. 😉
My husband filed for divorce. He said he loves me but just isnt happy. Unless God gives him a change of heart the final hearing is 2/13. My inside chatter is “my best is not good enough”, “not worth staying with”, and worse – I really needed to read above your statement not to define my whole self by this small moment. i guess its a huge moment for me and I love him dearly, so what he is saying and doing have shaken me and “unglued” insecurities and doubts about myself. Ive let those sound louder to me than the truth of what God says about me.
I am so sorry that your marriage is hurting right now. I will fervently pray on your behalf and your husband’s behalf. God does amazing things in marriages – ours is a testament to that.
Dear Heavenly Father, I ask that you put your loving and faithful arms around Robin today that she may feel a sense of your peace and comfort during this difficult time. I pray that you squash the negative chatter that is replaying in her head, for we know those thoughts are from the devil who only wants us to draw away from you. I ask that you also work in her husband’s heart that he sees marriage is a treasured gift designed by you. I also pray that they may come together and talk this all through and really listen to what the other has to say and if there is hurt to not become angry and affronted but listen with open ears. I ask this all in your Holy and Precious Name, Amen.
Dear Robin, I was in a similar place about 15 years ago. I can tell you that even though I didn’t understand it at the time, I can see now the miracles that God brought to all of us – my ex-husband (remarried with a 10 year old daughter), my son (who is a wonderful, faith-filled college freshman), and me (seeing through all the experiences following my divorce how protected we are by God’s love in all circumstances, and remarried to a loving, committed Christian man, and stepmother to a beautiful young lady). This is not the end of God’s plan for your life – I’m sure you know that; but hold onto the solid rock of God’s love and don’t let the winds of change shake you from that.
With love.
I strived for a long time to be “accepted” and still do. I am often tempted to think my acheivements or lack of define who I am. But this post is a good reminder that I am fulfilled in Christ. I am accepted just as I am.
I’ve learned that inside chatter comes at the worst times, and is from the evil one. I’ve learned to keep praying vigilantly and to read even more scripture! God always brings me out of that pit! Since I grew up in a negative environment, these chatters really bother me, so I also ask my husband to pray for me, and that helps a bunch!
Inside I often think that I am not good at anything and that I don’t really fit in. I loved what Lysa said about not being invited to something should just be thought of as a passing moment and not a defining moment. I will remember that and not let those passing moments become a huge deal in my life. Thanks you!
Growing up in the midst of dysfunction and instability allowed me to learn quite the repertoire of inside chatter first hand. The beauty of working on my relationship with God over the last few years is that he’s allowed me to turn my inside chatter into inside ‘conversations’. Whenever the devil tries to start something, I can remind my chatter that I am the daughter of a perfect God and he does not make mistakes. The wonder of God’s bible is that he has a scripture for every possible ‘chatter’ my mind can possibly come up with.
My inside chatter is your not pretty enough, or you don’t fit in!
I love the days I wake up and a Christin song or Bible verse is running through my head. If only I could hold on to these positive types of inside chatter. But, unfortunately, my own insecurities left open to the whispers of the great deceiver, try to lead me down the road of self pity and/or grumbling. As I learned at a recent conference, these should be indicators, not dictators. I need to take them as warning signs to reign my thoughts in with God’s truth. His truth directs my focus off self and toward his greater plan for my life and His glory. Thank God for His word of truth!
My “inside chatter” is: just give up-you’re not fooling anyone. I try my best to be a Godly woman, wife, and mother; but Satan continues to argue that “you’re not that woman”. I’m in the middle of the Unglued study and am learning very important tools to combate Satan’s nonsense. (Thank you Lysa) I am looking forward to the webcast!
My inside chatter is that “you’re not good enough”. I need to rely on Christ to keep me strong in knowing that I AM good enough.
My inside chatter has always been “your not good enough”, “you don’t fit in”, “your not a likeable person”. I’m trying to quiet those chatters with God’s pouring of love for me but someday’s I can turn a deaf ear and only hear the ugliness.
This has helped me remember that when my friends don’t have time to talk Its NOT that the don’t –its just they are so busy –for the moment. And that’s just what it is….the moment. Not the life time friendship!
How funny that you think you have moved past certain things and then all of a sudden you read something like this and your inside chatter takes you back to places that were hidden but never delt with!!! As a child, you may not understand that you are more than that chatter in your head, as a young teenager you are really trying to fit in and because of that chatter you may make choices that are not good ones, because you want to be noticed, you want to be loved, then one day you wake up your a 45 yrs old women, loving life as a wife, mother and friend who knows she is a child of God only because now the chatter only allows you to stay there for a minute or two!!! Then its time to move on for I know a God who loves me for me and is willing to use me in this everyday life!!!
When it comes down to my inside chatter it tells me all kinds of negative things. At times there are a few positive things that may spring up. I father recently passed from complications with cancer. My whole world seemed to shatter in one moment. My mother had passed away 12 years ago and now my inside chatter was telling me now you are really alone, no one will love you, no one will go to bat for you like your parents. I felt like such an orphan seeing as though they adopted me 30 years ago. My inner chatter constantly tells me if your biological mother didn’t care enough to keep you, how can anyone else love you? I must constantly remind and reassure myself that I matter, Jesus loves me, I am chosen, I am a royal priesthood, I am loved and that God is faithful. So today I stand and pour out my heart to say I am not perfect, however I know and love a God who is. And in that I have the strength to stand with my head held high!
My inside chatter is “you’re not good enough” and “you don’t matter”. “You are fat and ugly”…and on and on. I read devotionals that are uplifting and the Word of God and I remind myself that God loves me with an everlasting love and he accepts me right where I am at…he loves me unconditionally. He will never abandon me or forsake me. I am forgiven and an heir with Christ.., a child of the king.
My inside chatter has matured over the years. thank goodness I don’t listen to that insecure 20/30 year old. Now in my 40s, I don’t deal with the “you don’t measure up, “head chat”. Now I am asking myself, “am I being wise, do I reflect Christ? Im reminded that many are watching. People know ive been a Christian for 20+ years, they expect maturity. I think as Christian women (40s, 50s, 60, 70s+) we have a tremendous responsibility to step up and lead. There’s a certain amount of grace given to young Christisns, and we all need grace, but at 50 I should not be making the same mistakes as I did at 30. My head chatter is…are you being a grown up?
I’ve learned that our minds can not tell the difference between a lie and truth. It believes whatever we tell it. Capturing the negative inside chatter and replacing it with TRUTH is a daily Spiritual discipline that I have not yet mastered. It takes great conscious effort every single day.
Lysa, you have an amazing gift from God to put into words so much of what I am thinking! I thank God for you, your words, your ministry, your humor, and your ability to connect with women. I love the “realness” in your words and stories–you seem to be able to capture real life problems and help me to understand that I am not the only one thinking these things, and then make them into a lesson in how our Father can solve these problems and issues with us. Thank you so much for your honesty and willingness to serve your “Sistahs” in the Lord. I pray many blessings for you and your ministry, and I thank God for your willingness to serve and be transparent for us. Your words are an encouragement. May God be glorified through your work!
My inside chatter is saying you are not good enough. When I fight with my husband my inside chatter is saying if you changed your attitude or if you kept a cleaner more organized home things would be better. I also have the habit of comparing myself to other moms to see if I am worthy. Other moms are crafty make great food have the cleanest house I have ever seen. Thankfully, I know that I have my loving Savior. He is transforming me daily but the best part is He loves and accepts me the way I am!
My inside chatter says I will never reach my goals. I’m praying more often and asking God to help me.. it’s helping so much!
I once read that there’s a tiny scrap of truth attached to every lie. That’s why they’re so hard to ignore. You grab onto that tiny truth and the attached lie hangs on in your heart and mind and the obsessing begins.. sigh…
My “inside chatter” has always been around; at times very loud & to the extreme of being my worst enemy, always rising its evil head at any given opportunity. Through time & spiritual growth I have found ways to channel that “inside chatter” of doubt & negativity and use it now as a monitor or gauge of my own spiritual growth, if experiencing more then a tiny chatter I’d better be doing more Bible studying & praying. Looking forward to the webcast tonight 🙂
You learn growing up that what others say or do does not matter, the only thing that matters is that God loves us and sees us for who we are. I have learned being a christian when I begin to start having negative thoughts to turn it into prayer, for God to reveal the truth and help me see the good in all situations.
I went back to reread the directions and realized that although I sent encouragement, I did not really answer the question!! (And I do so want to win a prize!!!-LOL) So here goes: I have had quite a bit of negative chatter throughout my life, although it may not have seemed so when looking at my exterior life. I seemed to always have it all together in front of people, BUT when behind closed doors, I was a mess, trying to constantly be “perfect” in order to live up to what was expected of me. Just recently, and ONLY with the Lord’;s help and Godly friends’ counsel, I am learning to silence these negative murmurings and to call them what they are–the enemy’s tactics to get me to focus on myself, not the Lord. So I use Scripture to combat any of these lies that enter my thoughts. I quote them and tell the enemy to flee. I make sure my “armor” is on each morning as I meet with the Lord before going into my day. All praise to the Father in heaven through Jesus His Son for His Word and for sending Godly women into my life with good counsel.
My “inside chatter” is always negating what the Holy spirit is telling me. I am not thin enough, not a good enough wife, could do better as a mom, I have a terrible chatter about not being as good as other women, in looks, thinness or as wife and mother.
I am thankful every day for Christ, who made me a New Creation, so I do have all I need inside me to end the chatter…..
I know that the battleground of my mind is where the rubber meets the road! When God is powerfully moving in my life, I can be sure there will be attack from my enemy as well. I also know my enemy will use whatever weapon he can, whether it be my own self doubt (why are my adult children struggling so hard? Did I do something terribly wrong in raising them?) or self pity (no one cares how hard I have to work to make things happen for them, they just expect me to do it. Don’t I get a life?) or whatever other life experience can be dredged up and relived in all its glory – usually in technicolor with added effects for fun. We typically do not remember reality – it is alway colored by what is currently happening in our lives. I am teaching a small group meeting under the topic Body and Soul – tomorrow night we will be discussing stress and how it relates to our spirit and body. The webcast should add to this conversation and I have encouraged everyone to listen in. Thanks for addressing issues most of us keep quiet about.
My inside chatterbox has a great memory — too great. It remembers EVERYTHING. Things I’m supposed to forget. My inside chatterbox also has really strong arms and helps carry and pick back up things I leave at the cross. Things I’ve done or said that I’ve been forgiven for and released from. My inside chatterbox is a jealous, insecure, ugliness – that seems to like brownies :-)…I find myself navel-gazing instead of looking up far too often. Christ has promised me perfect peace when I focus on Him. It’s always a choice…
My inside chatterbox has a great memory — too great. It remembers EVERYTHING. Things I’m supposed to forget. My inside chatterbox also has really strong arms and helps carry and pick back up things I leave at the cross. Things I’ve done or said that I’ve been forgiven for and released from. My inside chatterbox is a jealous, insecure, ugliness – that seems to like brownies…I find myself navel-gazing instead of looking up far too often. Christ has promised me perfect peace when I focus on Him. It’s always a choice…
Oh my, God’s timing couldn’t be more perfect. I have been struggling with this inside chatter for the last 2 days. The devil is on my back and feels like he won’t release. I know these thoughts are from him so I wallow in my own pity and not of God so I have been trying very hard to turn them over and not pick them back up. He is telling me I am not a good enough friend except when something is needed, your not a good enough listener, you are too much of a fixer, and the list continues. But his I do know – God made me and yes there are areas I need to work on but as a whole I am a child of the King.
I have always allowed “inside chatter” define me. Being overweight as a child pushed me to loose weight in my adolescent years & even stayed with me as an adult. Always battling my weight. The sad part was, I caught myself defining others by their weight because it was such an issue that was always in front of me. Once God rescued me from myself, I have learned to see others for more than what is on the outside. Now when I hear inside chatter I pray about the “chatterer” & the “chattee”. Satan is always in front of me using this weakness & that is when I pray for the armor of God for a hedge of protection over my mouth! I still hear things being said by others & I automatically go to God in prayer. If not, once again I will become the prisoner of the chatter.
I’ve struggled all of my life with feeling left out, invisible, and unworthy. It has affected my marriage and my greatest fear of all is that I’ve passed it on to my kids by reading into everything in their relationships. I believe it has become a sin issue in my life and I desperately want the Lord to replace the negative feelings with my worth in Him.
I also have unkind inside chatter that needs to be silenced at times. Only God’s word had effectively silenced that old tape recording that gets started. Thank you for your post, it is good to know that I’m not alone
My inside chatter is worrying. I am a big worrier. I will think of the different (bad) outcomes that could come from a situation & dwell on it. I am also in a fairly new job & want everyone to like me. I have never seen so many women gossip about each other & complain!
I’m currently reading SoulDetox and am learning that inside chatter is toxic if it’s negative. I’m training to do a 5K in April and when the negative says I’m too tired it’s easy to not push myself like I need to. I’m learning that I need to take every thought captive and especially the negative ones so that I don’t have a toxic soul.
Despite all of the negative and painful thoughts that we all seem to carry with us on a daily basis, God is always there too, whispering to be still, to listen, to rest in Him. So day by day, hour by hour and moment by moment, we have the choice and the opportunity to turn our minds and our hearts away from pain, anger and fear, and toward Him.
Honestly I have learned that sometimes it is hard to stop that negative chatter. It becomes so almost habitual that it seems normal and like it never is going to stop. You could say it’s “just who I am”. However, I know that is not true and it takes perseverance telling myself “no” to begin changing this thought process. The enemy uses our negative thinking to advance his agenda but I have to remember my identity in Christ and it doesn’t include all those negative thoughts!
Inside chatter is a struggle. My main problem area is telling my self that I am not good enough and that people don’t like me. I tried my whole childhood trying to please others and wanting them to like me. I never felt I was good enough until college when I escaped the bitter environment and found out who I was in Christ. I then met my husband who taught me to love myself and that I am good enough. I continue to struggle with wanting people to accept me but I am making imperfect progress with Gods help.
I remember this most vividly from my school days and it is so very hard to overcome!
This invitation is so timely and tome, it is a persoanl invitation from the Lord. This particular issue of negative thoughts has ramped up significantly in this time and I have been seeking the Lord and reading His Word and praying He transform me by the renewing of my mind. I’m anticipating your webcast invitation is a personal answer to prayer and I praise our marvelous Almighty Savior for all of YOU!!
Inside chatter has always been a part of my life since I was in school, often the victim of bullying. After a while you start to think that everything someone is talking about secretly is about you. A few years ago I was watching a movie (can’t remember the tittle) where the mother said to her son “It’s not all about you”. This spoke volumes to me. Even though the mother was likely trying to get something else across to her son, what it said to me was that not everything someone else says secretly is about me. Not being included in someone else’s plans wasn’t about me. I’m not the root of every negative circumstance. It gave me a lot less to worry about.
I too remember these days as a young girl. The inner chatter remains in many like me.Looking so forward to participating.
Inside chatter can be destructive as the “can’ts, not good enoughs, and you’ll nevers” float around, haunting us. Too many times inside chatter can strip us of joys, opportunities, and the chance to face fears. The Lord’s love is mighty and encompassing as He desires for His children to be free. I am an overcoming “Inside Chatter” as I press forward into seeking all that the Lord has planned for me and let go of the chit chat that tries to stray me from the path.
Like a lot of things in life, I thought I was alone with this challenge. Wonderful to know, I am not alone another thought that the Satan uses to keep us apart from our God. I can’t wait to hear some of your techniques to stop or change this pattern.
Inside chatter has always been a struggle for me. I am learning to discern the voices of the chatter. God, flesh or enemy. Sometimes it’s even something somebody else has planted and has taken root. But I now try to take every thought captive and examine it then determine who it’s from and listen to Gods voice.
How many times have I expereinced being the one left out? I can’t do anything to change other people. The Lord has taught me (and is still teaching me) to not be like those people. I need to be the one to reach out and love everyone that is around me. I need to not show partiality of favoritism, because Christ loves me with grace and mercy I don’t deserve- that is how I need to love others.
Its amazing to me that at fifty-four years old I still hear the voice that says “you don’t fit in”. It doesn’t make sense. I am the mother of seven children ages 33 to 5, grandmother of three, wife and child of the living God, but still I hear the voice that says your not good enough to be with the “in crowd”. It says it even at church. I know that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. My children continue to tell me that I am the best. My husband doesn’t have that voice and loves me just as I am. But just as I am to me sometimes doesn’t feel good enough. When I am feeling that way, after my pity party, I remember the words that God says about me. That I am His…..that I am loved….that I am worth Him sending His son…..that I am a gift to others. Thank you for your post. It reminds me that I am His and I am loved. I belong to a bigger party of friend, many of which I don’t know yet but one day will be dancing on the streets of gold with. Thank you.
The best way for me to deal with inside chatter is to constantly have positive information going in. I listen to online sermons every morning while getting ready for work, otherwise I have worship music on. Putting my focus on Him, remembering His promises and trusting Him, keeps me from focusing and worrying about the chaos going on around me.
I always felt like the outsider in my circle of friends in High School and I think that still spills over in my life today. Not only do I let me mind think that way I also let the inside chatter of the devil keep me from growing in my relationship with God. Look forward to listening to the webcast.
Boy do I know about inside chatter. I am a 56 in one year I was divorced and laid off from my job. I have been in school now for 6 months for medical coding and billing. When husband told me he was leaving my self esteem went to an all time low, leaving me because I wasn’t young enough, not pretty enough you name I was all of it. Then 4 months later I was laid off from my job as a wedding planner, replaced by someone younger. Boy was the chatter working in me. After about two months of self pity, I was reading the Psalms and realized I need to focus on all God has done for me and not the negative chatter. I am now in school with straight “A’ s and loving it. Looking forward to what God has in store for me.
I could go on for days about all of the inside chatter I have going on in my head every day..I second guess myself all the time and always take the blame for everything going wrong around me even when it’s not my fault. So exhausting..I realize the inside chatter gets so much quieter and I feel so much confident, at peace and sure of my worth when I put God first and immerse myself in His Word and around other like minded people that encourage me to trust in the Lord.
My inside chatter is I am not thin enough, or that I am not thoughtful.
What I have learned, that like the crashing sea, my inside chatter can be calmed by God. That through prayer and scripture and even friends, I can be reminded that God loves me and is always with me.
What I have learned about the “Inside Chatter” of my life is that it has had control for far too long. I know that it makes me pause before I do just about anything for Christ. Because my “Inside Chatter” tells me I am not good enough. The worst part of it is is that I can look at any other woman and know that God loves them exactly as they are and I truly believe it. And I guess it’s not that I think God doesn’t love me, just that he is highly disappointed. I want so much to release this from my life. I feel as if I am in a funnel about to go down the drain.
As i scrolled down reading some of the comments i realized that I’m not the only one that has inner chatter saying “you’re not good enough” or “you’re not pretty” and “this is the best you will ever do” . This is something I have been dealing with for a very long time never thinking I was good enough to do anything and it worked in school I never tried out for anything and didn’t try to do anything after high school just got a job and started working had 2 failed marriages and kids to be hurt in the midst of it all. Thank God he doesn’t see us as we and others do he looks deep inside and sees what have covered up and when we choose to let him that is what he will let shine!!!
I have always struggled with wanting to fit in and be accepted as part of the group. If I was thinner, if I was prettier, if I had more money, if I lived somewhere else, if I …………..I am tired of the “If I’s” and am learning to be who God says I am – I am His, I am loved, I am beautiful, I am created in His image. Thank you Lord Jesus for who I am in You!! Lysa, I have my index cards and learning to turn to His word – the living Word which is sharper than any double edged sword to cut out the negative chatter and replace it with the chatter of the Holy Spirit. Thank you!! Looking forward to tonight. May God bless you & Sheila and all the women who join in.
I can easily let my inside chatter take over and soon I start believing the lies that satan wants me to believe and lead me away from the truth the Christ has given me.
I have learned that the more I focus on the inside chatter and dwell on what its saying, the easier my heart believes those negative thoughts. Its easy to feel defeated and lose my heart’s desires when I focus on my hurts and the lies of the enemy. I have to stop those thoughts on a daily basis! I am a daughter of the King!
My negative chatter lately is mostly worries – from the mundane – oh, no, we have to do our taxes soon, how complicated is it going to be; to the more important – will my son be OK at college, is he doing all of his work, is he taking care of himself, etc. What I have found works best when this negative, fearful chatter starts to dominate my thinking, is to turn my mind to God, pray, surrender my worries to Him, and let the Holy Spirit fill me with the assurance that with God all things are possible, and that all things work together for good for those who love him and are called according to his purpose. Thank you, Lord!
thank you for having a forum to just express struggles
To be honest I don’t have a ton of negative inside chatter. I by no means have it all together but I do strive to rest in Gods never failing, never giving up, unending, always and forever love. I would however like to learn how to help point others to the confidence found only in Gods love for them.
I was raised in a very performance-based family….that A- should have been an A, ect. Now I am working for a company that has management that is very quick to point out negative things and is very rarely encouraging. It is a constant battle for me to not allow my performance or actually what others think of how I perform as an employee, mother, wife, friend, ect. to dictate how accepted and loved I feel. The word God gave me for 2013 is “Love”. At first, I wasn’t sure why He gave me that, but He has been speaking to my heart in so many ways that His love is UNCONDITIONAL!! He accepts me as I am….even if I “fail”. As I look to Him the “chatter” inside fades. He is good, He is kind and full of mercy. Thank you, Lord!! and thank you, Lysa for such wonderful encouragement! 🙂
My inside chatter is that I will never be healthy. The doctors will never find the answers to fix me and heal me. I have been battling and I am just not healing. I need God’s intervention.
It’s unbelievable how much inside chatter I have and don’t even realize it! Though I struggle daily with my negative chatter, I am learning to capture those thoughts and either try and do away with them completely or use Scripture or positive chatter to combat it. I tend to replay conversations in my head that I have had with other people earlier in the day and then spend time finding all the “stupid” things I said and beat myself up when really there was nothing to worry about. How crazy is that??? Can’t wait to see what you have to say this evening on this subject!
We are always so hard on ourselves. Negative seems to enter our brain….and stick. She doesn’t like me, I not as pretty as her….on an on. But, God made us in his image. To him we are all beautiful. I am looking for to the webcast this evening.
Good morning to all my sisters here 🙂
I just read through many of your comments and can relate in a lot of ways to so many of you. For over the past 13 years I have found myself unable to get out much due to an injury and as a result I deal with daily chronic pain. This has left me with a lot of alone time. Talk about the potential for negative inner chatter! There have been plenty of periods of it, believe me. Rather than just praying during my morning devotions, I try to keep an ongoing dialogue throughout the day. Whether it be recognizing and being thankful for a specific blessing when a negative thought comes up, meditating on a favorite verse when I am folding towels, praying for someone who “popped into my mind”…it’s hard to stay negative when you are in the positive power of The Light. “Pray without ceasing” ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:17.
I’ve learned that as long as I think I’m not good enough then I’m not. I have to fill my thoughts with who God says I am.
Being an only child, my inside chatter was often the only thing I had to keep me company, not very healthy for sure. I need the Lord’s help to remind me my inside chatter is often inaccurate.
Inside chatter has kept me from doing and saying things that should have been done and said. I am shy by nature and then the chatter holds me back even more. Now I think what’s the worse that can happen. Most times it’s nothing serious or I realize it’s a fear that doesn’t need to be there. Still a work in progress.
For the past two years I have struggled with the loss of my husband and children’s father to suicide. It left all of us broken and lost emotionally, physically and most of all spiritually. My closest and so-called best friends encouraged me to repent and confess how my marriage became broken and dissolved so that they could help me and so that the Lord could help me through salvation, forgiveness and Faith. However, what I and my children received was quite the opposite. My best friends and our entire community turned on us, banished us and ridiculed us. Rumors began, judgement was passed and condemnation was the end result. It has a been a horrific, painful, injury ridden 2 years. However through God’s ways and being able to turn my family to his TRUE feelings, love and acceptance of us it has also been a Faith-filled, inspirationally restored and self reliant 2 years. Me and my beautiful children have learned the hard way to not listen to or accept the “inner chatter” and especially the public outcry of who they want to make us out to be. We are all God’s children and he is now the Father of my two children. I have given myself completely to the Lord and turned my children over to him as well and our lives are now filled with so much more than we could have ever imagined through the pain of our loss. God is the only way and as soon I chose to Let Go and Let God my life has become an entirely newfound journey that I look forward to exploring every single day.
We all face inside chatter, particularly as the Evil One tries to convince us that we cannot overcome our mistakes or reach for our dreams. The most effective way to overcome is to find scripture that encourages us and claim the promises God has given us. We must speak the WORD into our own lives and read the Word outloud, so that it quiets any negative “inside chatter”.
Also, it is important to encourage others by speaking the Word into their lives too. It will help defeat their “inside chatter” as well.
I can’t wait for the webcast tonight! Thank you so much for the invite!
The readers comments are so amazing.
The only thing or person we can put our whole identity in is Jesus! That’s a great revolution, thanks!
What a relevant topic for ladies! Satan’s favorite battlefield is our mind and one of his age-old lies is “You’re not good enough.” (see Eve, Gen 3:5-6) The reason we all believe it is because it begins with a grain of truth. Even Paul said, “I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) dwelleth no good thing” (Rom. 7.) However, when we accept Christ, we become a brand new creature IN CHRIST! “I’m not good enough” is the very chatter that brings us to the point of salvation, but then we must leave it there, at the foot of the cross. My daily struggle to “take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ”
I struggle with finding my identity in what I weigh instead of who I am in Christ. The inside chatter can sometimes be deafening. I am finishing you book “Made to Crave” and look forward to the webcast tomorrow.
Now that I read Unglued I can be more aware of my inside chatter and stop it before it consumes me. I have to redirect my thoughts: give grace, imperfect progress, choose joy!
To see myself thru God’s eyes!
How well I know that chatter! Thank you for addressing these real and relevant topics and for sharing your wisdom on how to take our every thought captive in obedience to Christ.
I’ve learned that Inside Chatter is more believable when I’m outside of the flow of the Spirit. When I’m flowing with the Spirit what God says about me is louder than all the negative things I can say about me or that the enemy tries to make me believe so that I would be in a place of defeat rather than victory. In my experience you can’t really prevent the negative inside chatter but you can use it as a reminder to seek Gods truth about you so that as soon as it creeps in you have Gods word to counter it.
Inside chatter can and has been such a defeat in my life. I pray that God replaces MY inside chatter with HIS inside voice and direction to lead, guide and redirect the lies often heard. Thank you Lysa and Proverbs 31 for beautiful encouraging reminders. May God continue to bless you and your ministry. Prayers for your healing as well. Thank you for boldly sharing your struggles
I have recently found myself in a season of change. This past year was a whirlwind of new beginnings and closed chapters. I finalized my divorce this winter after seven long years of being married to an alcoholic and substance abuser. My inside chatter for some time now has been negative. Feelings of “you’re not good enough” “you are not a good mom” have raced through my head. Raising children was never meant to fall on one individual’s shoulders. I have committed to myself that regardless of my circumstances I can only change myself and so I have become more hungry, seeking God’s word, his peace, and wisdom. I got to reading on the Proverbs 31 Ministry’s web page about the book Unglued. I subscribed to have the 5 day challenge sent to my inbox and even downloaded the first 2 chapters. I laughed, being able to related to the raw, human side of Lysa’s stories. I am in the process of getting the book for myself to read. I’m very excited about the webcast tonight and more excited about the fellowship and reassurance that “I’m not alone.”
Hoping to get my Tuesday night bible study to watch tonight!!! I know all of us could work on this
My heart forgets what I know is true and that chatter that loops in my thinking paralyzes me in fear. Things like- you are messing up your kids, your marriage will never be good, you will never get a good job. And my heart is heavy and my hope is buried beneath the burdens I carry. But God says this isn’t true. I have to daily choose that truth.
I once heard it takes 10 positives to combat or cancel a negative. My inner chatter is so full of negative talk that I’d never have time to sleep if I had to invent 10 positives per negative! ? I need to remember how God views me and not rely on humans to define my self worth. I know what to do but it It’s often my last answer to the chatter within. I wish I could teach my daughters to look to His words for defining themselves especially at their current ages (7 and 8) when it seems they are bombarded by negative comments all day at school.
Wow. Thank you so much for this post. I got tears in my eyes, because I have battled with this my whole life. I have put my power, my self worth in other peoples’ hands instead of my own, or instead of measuring myself up against that fullness we receive in Christ.
What a defining moment reading this post was for me. Thank you!!!
Inside chatter is the WORST to fight! The devil knows JUST what to say to chip away at the good feeling Christ leaves in your heart. I am so weak and filled with insecurities…and the father of lies knows this. Pray for me to be strong enough to overcome the negative inner chatter and be able to turn towards Christ daily.
Hi Lisa! Great subject. I have often been a victim of this negative internal chatter myself. God is helping me with this. When my mind takes me to places that I don’t need to go to God prompts me to focus on what is real, what is true. This enables me to “shut off” the feelings that can make me crazy sometimes. Thank you, Lisa, I enjoy your writing so much.
I’ve learned a lot about the “inside chatter” in my life, I’ve noticed that sometimes if we let the chatter become too loud and distracting we have a hard time actually hearing what God is telling us. I’m working on learning how to tune it out and focus on what is really important.
This morning in my quiet time I read the story of Hannah in 1 Samuel 1-3. In that story Hannah had a “rival” who “kept provoking her in order to irritate her”. Negative Inside Chatter is my rival that provokes me. It can come out of no where – in the quiet of a moment, the laughter of a group of friends, the defeat I feel after coming unglued with my kids, the deflated sense I feel after finding out a door was closed for an opportunity. Deep inside the chatter says “your not worthy to have that friendship anymore”, “why did you laugh like that”, “there you go again being a bad mom losing it with your kids”, “you heard God wrong when you thought He was leading you in that direction”. But then I realize, those thoughts-chatter aren’t from God. They are from the enemy-my rival who wants to steal, kill & destroy the life I have in Christ. God has given me a new name & has called me as a Child of His. He loves me and gives me purpose and desires the best things for me. When I turn my focus back on Him and The Cross Christ died on for me, the hurt & negative chatter disappear.
I can’t wait for the webcast tonight! Thank you so much for the giveaway!
Mary
As I read this post, I could not help to cray because memories and feelings came alive from the many times that I have not been chosen for that job I so much wanted, for the times when I wanted to be friend of someone who rejected me, and for the times that my own family would reject me because of my faith. But then Jesus reminded me that I may not have been chosen and will not be chosen for many things in the future, but HE chose me and you to be fellow heirs of our father’s kingdom. With that, all I need to do is focus on Him and not my circumstances.
That inside voice that says, “How could you gain all that weight back that you just lost! You might as well just give up, because no matter how hard you work, you will only gain it all back.”
Thanks Lysa. Just what I needed today. I’m feeling with some frightening medical issues right now and lots of negative chatter in my head though I know Gods truths in my heart.
I can’t wait for the webcast tonight. I talk down to myself all the time. I think it comes from being made to grow up to fast and having to take on adult responsibilities as a child. It made me always fear not being good enough. It has continued on into my 25 year marriage and I know it is changing my kids as well.
Lysa,
Even though I did Made to Crave twice with friends, and even though I have lost 97 lbs, and even though I am off all diabetes and high-blood pressure medications, even though I am healthier than in years, I still don’t feel confident that I can do it, that I can stay strong till the end because of my many failures in the past. My confidence can get shaken, but I know that the Lord is my confidence and I take each day as a new opportunity to succeed in Him. Thank you for guiding me on the right path.
As a woman whom is suffering with manic depressive disorder, Inside Chatter can trigger me into a very bad place. It is not easy to not go on a downward spiral in my thoughts. Once I start it is so difficult to stop.
negative inside chatter is a pretty constant battle for me, rearing its’ head more often than i’d like to admit. this voice continually tells me that i’m not worthy, that i don’t measure up, and that i have nothing to offer to the given situation. in the last few weeks, i have been more conscious of these thoughts rolling around in my head so often, and have realized what a detrimental thing it is for me to get caught up in this negative internal chatter… so caught up that i might actually give it weight & LISTEN! sometimes it’s overwhelmingly hard to remind myself that what the voice is telling me isn’t the truth about me. i’m excited about this webcast because it could not have been more timely…. just this past weekend i decided that i’ve had enough of this voice & that something needs to change (the problem is, i didn’t know what! but i think the webcast tonight will be a great place to start.). thank you!
my inside chatter is that I am not smart enough, talented enough or pretty enough. I constantly compare my self to others. I know that my identity is in Christ and that he has made me and has chosen me for the things that he has called me to do. I am working on not comparison g myself to others and grasping onto who God wants and made me to be,(me)….. 🙂 I really enjoy and am learning and growing with the proverbs 31 ministries. thank you for being obedianrt:)
I am SO looking forward to the webcast tonight! Inner chatter has been something I’ve struggled with for years, and with a personal battle with an eating disorder for 16 years it was increasingly poor. God is a miracle worker and though I still struggle with thoughts and behaviors that aren’t healthy, I have come a LONG WAY! As a mother of soon-to-be three, I DAILY ask God for grace and the PERSPECTIVE with everything I face. 1 Corinthians 10:13 says “No test or temptations that come your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face…God will never let you down; he’ll never let you be pushed past your limit…”
Each day I need to CHOOSE to believe His truths about me. Not the lies of the devil.
My “Inside Chatter” tell me that when I am not included in family functions as little or big as they are or am don’t get any kinds of communication (calls, emails, text messages) from people that claim to care for me…. it’s because I am not fun, bubbly, young enough or worth being with…. but God reminds of of Psalm 77:1 ~ I cry out to God without holding back. So I begin to tell God exactly how I feel without masking anything nor holding back… I have learned that Those inner voices is the enemy trying to destroy me…. trying t take me as far away from the Lord as possible…. but my love for our Heavenly Father brings me pace to feeling His love and His peace which is the only thing we really need. My “Inside Chatter” is gone once my focus is on God again….
I learned that the wholeness of my identity is that I’ve been given fullness in Christ. My identity is not how the world sees me, it’s based on how He sees me and who I am IN HIM. 🙂
Growing up in a conservative Mennonite home, I lived with ‘inside chatter’ on a daily basis. It became my constant companion. As the only Mennonite family on our block and whose kids attended public school, it was very evident we lived very different lives at home and at school. People staring at our conservative choice of dress, talk, cars, home, etc. was nothing new. After all, we had grown to accept this as simply a part of life…
What made the difference; made daily life in ‘the world’ bearable and enjoyable was the confidence, love and support poured into us by our parents. They believed that Jesus set the example of ‘being in the world but not of it’ and therefore being ‘different’ was normal and okay. They both worked in ‘the world’, daily interacting with non-Mennonites not only successfully, but forming very solid and life-lasting friendships. This allowed us to walk through our growing up years believing that, although we were excluded from many events by our own choice or others not including us, better things could fill our lives just as fully. Not to say I didn’t struggle with feelings of being left out…It just helped to remind me I’d live through it just fine. I wouldn’t be warped just because I couldn’t go to a party, dance, or movie…
I have long since been separated from the Mennonite church and way of life, but the strong, Christian values instilled in me so long ago are my rock foundation and source of truth when now the ‘inside chatter’ teases me that values and biblical guidelines are negotiable. Your ministry, Lysa, reinforces my choice to only listen to God-driven ‘inside chatter’.
Thank you for who you are and what you do!
My inner tape is stuck on never enough. I’m not good enough. I don’t do such and such well enough. I am not lovable enough or cute enough or strong enough or confident enough or fun enough. And on and on.
God has been working with me for years about “inside chatter”. I grew up in an area where there was a strong community tie, but I didn’t fit/belong in that group because of what I chose to believe in. As a result I became invisible. I grew up with listening to my own negative talk in that I was not valuable, worthy, liked, ect., because I was not noticed or included in so many things. I took this into my marriage, my adult friendships and even into being a mother. 20 years later I can see where God has over and over again showed me that I was loved, I was cherished, I was worthy, I was worth dying for, I was sung over, and rejoiced over and I still am! With His never-ending patience at loving me the message is starting to soak in and permeate on how I see myself. I’m a princess. I matter. His most recent lesson with me God is showing me how important it is to think on the positive and the praise-worthy and focus on that. (Phillipians 4:8)
I fight my inside chatter daily! Although I was raised in a loving home and have two degrees now, I was not raised to clean house. My mother suffered from mild depression and didn’t enforce cleaning up after ourselves (5 kids). I have battled with and lost to laziness my whole life. I am almost 40 With two girls and still don’t have motivation to keep house. I have to remind myself daily to give this over to God and trust Him to help me. I know it sounds stupid – See my inside chatter is coming out even as I type this. I really don’t want to make the same mistake with my girls, but fixing the disorganized mess I built up is so overwhelming.
I feel inside negative chatter is a choice we make. I think we all have it. If we listen to it then it continues. If we talk back to it and replace it with promises that God makes to us in His Word, it dimishes and we grow closer to God. Negative chatter is something we all combat, it is one of Satan’s many evil ways. I am so glad to know the Lord and that His constant help is with me, every minute of every day when I choose to listen to Him. Thanks Lysa for doing this Webcast tonight. Looking forward to it! Did you ever think you would have this many responses? Boy, I think I will be number 1883 or more depending on how many others are responding at this time. Wonderful! Thank you for bringing Jesus into all of ous lives in such meaningful ways. God Bless you.
I am half way through reading your new book Unglued. It is really speaking to me and I can hardly put it down. I deal a lot with outside emotions bubbling out in the negative and it has really taken a tole on me. I am a pastors wife and have really struggled through a lot of hurt and pain from other people. But have decided that I am not going to allow satan to upset me anymore. I am going to remember who I am in Christ and who I am truly battling and start to pray for the people. I am making progress already and that is what matters. Thank you Lysa for your sharing your real self and being such an encourager.
When I received the email re: the webcast through Women of Faith, my jaw dropped…this is exactly the issue I feel has taken center stage in all facets of my life. I look forward to tonight and hoping it will help me focus on what truly is important…turning to God instead of all these petty things that cause me to spin my wheels.
I’m blessed to know that other women are walking the same path in dealing with this. I look forward to the webcast tonight and learning more from you and Shelia.
i’m so glad i’m not a teenager anymore, a lot easier to have Christ’s perspective as an adult!
I am most aware of the inside chatter when I’m in the Word and praying regularly. I can’t otherwise recognize it. It seems ‘normal’ for negative thoughts to feed my heart when I’m not in tune with God. It’s only when I read the truth of the Bible that the counterfeit thoughts from the enemy become so clear! It’s then that I can rebuke, renounce and resist them. For me it has to do with my weight loss journey and my identity as a stay-at-home mom right now. I recently finished ‘Unglued’ as part of a book study in my weekly mom’s group – awesome! This past week I finished ‘Made to Crave’ and can’t wait to start it again! Thanks, Lysa. I recommend your books/Proverbs 31 devotionals to everyone I meet these days!
I have been living with negative chatter all my life. It leads to anxiety, panic attacks and depression. I only learned last week from my therapist that I do not need to go through this crazy emotional roller coaster. When it starts up I have my notebook beside me and I write out other things I can be doing. Like washing my hands in warm water till I smile, rip pages out of a notebook, work on my grocery list, read a book, watch a tv show. Make a cup of tea. Anything that will distract me from this great big negative chatter inside my head that says I am no good, that I am a failure. I also start listing the good things that I have been doing. Reading my Bible daily, eating healthy meals with meal plans. I have a choice now. I did not know that I had a choice. I thought I had to go through all this negativeness. I only just learned that I do not. And this is the most liberating I have ever felt. I am free for the first time in almost 50 years. Thank you God.
I have dealt with inside chatter my entire life. When someone, including family members, can make one comment and continue to make comments everytime they see you, the inside chatter starts. Talking with God is your only way to get through this. Laying your burdens before him is what you have to do. He doesn’t intend for us to deal with this by ourselves. The power of prayer is amazing.
I’ve learned that if I don’t have anything good to say to myself, about myself, I shouldn’t expect to hear it from others. Also, learned the importance of this as it applies to others too. When my thoughts become critical, I need to tell myself what I like or admire about that person. Focus on the positive!
Philippians 2:1-4
My inside chatter has often led me to talk to satan more than God. . .I find myself continuously telling the enemy to go away because he’s in the presence of the Lord! When I sometimes have to say it more because I’m the one that needs confirmation. . . it is truly a reminder that we can be our own worst enemy dealing with the difficulty of getting past the negative chatter. Why is it so easy for us to believe God’s promises for others, but believe the enemy’s lies for ourselves? When we’re told we’re not loved, we’re not good enough, we’re not smart enough, we’re not _____. . . . you fill in the blank beause I could go on and on. Everyday is a new day to make the decision NOT to fill in those blanks, but to instead choose to believe God’s promises for me and recognize my value as His child. We are all His favorite child :), we are loved beyond imagination, and are so valuable! Thank you Proverbs 31 for your wonderful ministry, you are truly a gift from God!!
Aren’t we always our own worst enemies? We give Satan his loophole into our mind and he fills it with lies or half truths which are still lies. Whenever I hear the negative chatter in my head about my past sins I remind myself that God has given me victory over that and tell Satan (LITERALLY) to get behind me and leave me alone! I remember all that my loving Savior has done for me and remind myself that the God who holds the universe LOVES me and holds me and no matter what anyone else says or does (including myself) that won’t change.
I can’t wait to hear what you have to say about inside chatter we all have inside ourselves. I am am mom of 4 with an extra family at my house and life has been extremely overwhelming. But with teaching my children from home I try to encourage them to take control over there thoughts to not let wasteful and hurtful thoughts take them captive. All while teaching this to them I have to remind myself to do the same thing myself. Our mind is a battlefield and we can let it go and not be ready for the spiritual war we have that is already won!!! Can’t wait to hear what you guys have to say.
I too have battled with negative mind chatter! Through prayer and the Holy Scriptures God has taught me to understand that who I am is not defined by other individuals and their opinion of me! I am a child of God, saved by the Blood of my Lord, Jesus Christ! It is my relationship with Jesus that gives my life meaning and a purpose! In Him I have found my Joy and my Hope!!
My “Inside Chatter” has changed over the years. I remember when I was younger that the chatter said I wasn’t good enough for anything. – Not for friends, boys, anyone! Then it changed to I’m not smart enough and will never make it. Now my chatter tells me (most of the time!) that – I’m a princess since my Father is the King of Kings. Now I’m trying to teach my granddaughters this so they will have an easier time “listening to themselves!”
Inside chatter… Whew! I struggle with my emotions regularly. I have very low self esteem so I try to over compensate sometimes with my emotions or lack of. My mind tells me I’m not smart enough or good enough to do certain things. I’m constantly worried about not being a good mother wife and daughter. But after reading this….none of that matters. If I turn it over to him, think before I speak, and remember to think how He would handle situations or how He would want me to handle situations. I’m thankful “Unglued” has fallen in my lap! It’s a work in progress…but I’m willing to try!!!
My inside chatter affects the way that I think and consider others. I didn’t get a lot of encouragement and had parents that were strict and didn’t offer a lot of love. As a child I felt like I couldn’t do anything right. Recently I have learned a lot about love – what it means to love myself, others, and God. It hasn’t been that long and I have really changed my perspective and have been able to be more positive, less edgy and forgive and forget more easily. I look to God’s example of love and while I still have times where my thoughts about myself or others spiral out of control, I know the truth because of His word.
Thanks, Lysa. I’m learning to let Christ fill not only my heart, but also my mind. When I’m full of Him there’s no room left for negative chatter from self or others to invade my thoughts. It’s a pleasant place to be.
My boyfriend and I recently, 5 days ago, broke up. I thought he was the one. I made the decision to end the relationship because in one conversation, one statement I realized he is not the one, not right now. He believes yelling is okay and I do not. Last night the inside chatter started to win and I started coming up with reasons why I could live with the yelling because I love him and I don’t want to give up on him, on us. Then a voice inside me, the Holy Spirit, said “that would be giving up on you”. So instead I got out my bible, well my bible on my iPad and dove in. By the time I was done the inside chatter was gone and I was back to focusing on God and fighting for me….back to not giving up on me!!!!
Inside chatter can defeat me if I allow it to take over. If I start my day off with time with the Lord and time in His word, it helps me stay focused and to open my eyes to the blessings that are right in front of me. Deuteronomy 33:27 – The eternal God is a dwelling place and underneath are the everlasting arms. And he drove out the enemy from before you, and said Destroy!
I love your books and devotions. I am truly struggling with negative chatter right now. I am in the process of getting a divorce from an abusive husband. I have been told that I am a terrible Christian, mom and person. I am accused of lying, being selfish, and many other things. Please pray for me.
My daily inside chatter is this. I suffer with pain constantly. I take many medications to help me cope and get through each day and night. But, it only numbs it. So to do my daily household chores is always a challenge. On the days I feel ok, I do some sort of house work like laundry. This is followed by a painful evening and nightime. The thoughts that run through my head tell me I am useless! can’t do more than one thing a day! What must my husband be thinking of me? I try to ignore these thoughts but, they are always in the back of my mind. Sometimes I tend to over-do-it! That tends to put me in bed for at least a day and night. I want to trust God to heal me. But, to be honest, I think I have gotten so use to being this way, that I am afraid of the changes that will occur if I do get healed. What a lack of trust in God! I am working on that lack of trust one step at a time. But, this one seems so huge to me I keep putting it on the back burner. I know I need to let go and let God. That is why I have signed up for the OBS Let it Go. I want to trust God to help me in every part of my being.
It’s good to know I’m not the only one who struggles with inner chatter! I tend to beat myself up over the past. My heart tells me God has forgiven me for any and everything but my mind is constantly fighting back and saying different. I sometimes feel that there’s something I have to do before I’m forgiven but God’s word tells me otherwise and I am so thankful! Thankful for His faithfulness, for His mercy, and for His gift of life! No matter what I’ve done, I can lay it at the cross and leave it. Thank you Jesus!
What I have learned from my “inside chatter” is that I need to stop listening to my inside chatter, only gets me into trouble! I need to be still and listen to God. Short and sweet 🙂
I can still experience those “left out” thoughts in my flesh but what I do with them is another matter. As I recognize God’s sovereignty in every aspect of my life, I can insert different, true thoughts into my mind as those “you weren’t invited” thoughts creep in uninvited. I can invite the Spirit of Truth to come in with thoughts that tell me God has a plan for me, that I am His beloved and that ALL things work together for my good, even NOT being included in a particular situation. One day we will know fully God’s plan, but for now, we can trust that He is good and all he does is wise and loving toward us!
I am learning that “inside chatter” can be my worst enemy. I can be in a room full of people and convince myself that I am all alone. There is not a feeling any worse than feeling alone and lonely in a room full of people. I am learning that I need to ask God to remind me that the words in my mind are not always from Him. I want to discern what is from God and learn to listen to those words. I remind myself daily that I am loved by God and that I can never truly be alone with Him in my life.
The chatter is constant ~ usually negative — would LOVE help with this!! I had a season in life when I got control but of late it has been VERY difficult ~ really excited I saw this on facebook. See you tonite @ 9pm. 🙂
I’ve been through a life threatening illness over most of the past 3+ yrs. When the mind is weak (from pain, illness) I’ve found the enemy attacks the mind harder. Praise God I’m much better now, but still battling Post Traumatic Stress off and on. I see “negative chatter” as self-condemnation in a sense. Definitely, not something that God places in our thoughts. So I stay focused on His truths, I keep in His word and surround myself with other sisters in Christ. Oh and I read amazing books by women like Lysa and Sheila. It helps me to read your stories to see the “truth” that I’m not alone in my thoughts the way the enemy tries to convince me that I am. That I too am on an imperfect journey. Finally, and most importantly, keeping my eyes on Jesus is what gets me through it all. Romans 8:28 …in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Yes I’ve had more than my share of struggles but through it all I am closer to the Lord than I have ever been in my life. If I hadn’t gone through what I have, I wouldn’t have the experience to go out now and help others in whatever way God has planned for me to do!
I learned that it takes 10 positive self talk thoughts to combat one negative.
I’ve learned that negative thoughts lead to negative actions.
Hi Lysa- I am so excited for the webcast! I have learned that inside chatter is something I need to get a handle on . The inside chatter keeps me distracted from doing what I need to. I need to remember that if my chatter is telling me things that I know God wouldn’t tell me, then I need to remove it from my mind, and heart! Can’t wait to hear what God has laid on your hearts for us ladies!
Negative thoughts manifest and grow. Same with positive… That’s why God says pray continuously, and David was constantly singing praises. If your mind is focused on praising God it’s hard for it to get filled with negative self talk, temptations, anger, etc…
As I grow in Christ, I have less of a battle with negative self talk. Not complete victory because Satan is always crouching trying to catch me at a weak moment. I would love to win this package.
Inside chatter is never productive, and never in accordance with God’s love and mercy…..looking forward to the webinar
negative chatter shapes how you view yourself and your world. Working with teens, its always interesting to hear how they view themselves and the lie or negative remarks they believe about themselves. I loved unglued and have found it very useful in the counseling office and personally. I hope that you make a teen addition of the book because I could use it on a regular basis in the counseling office.
I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind.
(2 Timothy 1:7)
I have learned that God is bigger than any situation, problem or trials we will go thru.
Chatter is the devils workshop in our minds. I can do all things thru Christ who strenghtens me. We all have things that cause us to feel that we have no one to
turn to. If we trust, pray to him and keep faith, study the word we will see his blessings according to his will for our lives.
Love and Be Kind and a Blessing to Others
Wow, God certainly knows what we need to hear from His heart and He used this article today. I’ve been feeling the sting of being left out in my situation for about 5 years now. I’d experienced this in the world occasionally but never in my church during the 20 years I’ve been going there until now. It hurts. I cry. I get sad and sometimes mad. I definitely don’t understand it, except that I know that we have an enemy who seeks to steal, kill and destroy. And he is the Author of Confusion as well, which means that every time I feel like I’m being excluded or hurt doesn’t mean that I am and that it is a legitimate personal slight. So, thanks Lysa for writing this down for us. And thank You, Lord. For You know us, you are intimately concerned about us and You love us. And that is enough.
Joy,
I know how you feel! A few years ago I began experiencing turmoil in our family’s church. I have felt leftout and disliked. It has been the hardest emotional trial, but I know Who is in control. We are not serving the members of the church, we are there to serve or Lord and Savior. There have been days I have wanted to walk away from the church, and there have been days my negative chatter has told me it is all my fault. But I know our God is bigger than the one causing this, and I will grow closer to Him through this process!
You will be in my prayers!
The inside chatter has been highly critical , demeaning, mean and ugly towards me. It has taken me years to overcome it because it was soooo loud. I had to learn to combat it with positive affirmations and I must say that I am not completely there yet. I Must be careful to not get overtired or allow myself to be in a negative environment. That voice came from an abusive environment while growing up, in my marriage and simply being around the wrong people. If you allow yourself to be mistreated then people will continue it. That sounds maybe rather common sense to most but it was not for me. I had been so beat down and brainwashed into thinking the wrong things that I became very passive and even counselors had me believing that I had a demon/ multiple personalities which made things even worse as you can imagine. Learning to trust that I could/can hear from God correctly, doing what He is asking of me, to FIGHT that voice with good and loving messages, to BELIEVE God taking Him at His word, and to allow these things to saturate me and take root has been a real battle but there is VIctory.
Why is it that the negative ‘inside chatter’ is always sooooo loud, but the voice of a positive God seems sooooo quiet? I agree with Patricia. It takes fighting the negativity with God’s holy word that you are worthy, you are precious, you are a redeemed child of God. I can’t wait to hear Lysa’s words for our battle tonight.
I have struggled with ‘inside chatter’ for as long as I can remember, but I have a feeling that pretty much all women struggle with the same emotions and feelings at war in their heart. God reminds me constantly that I am dearly loved. But sometimes His reassuring words are lost in the negative chatter going on in my heart. It is a daily struggle to drown out the chatter and focus on the Voice that speaks truth and love to my heart.
I am learning that the way to remove the negative chatter in my life is to focus on GOD’s promises. As I spend time in GOD’s word and am filled with His love, hope, and peace there is less room for negative self chatter. When doubt starts to set in I pray that my thoughts would be replaced by the reminders of who I am in Christ. I’m a work in progress but with GOD’s help I am getting there! I am looking forward to the webcast tonight!
I have all kinds of negative chatter going on just as the rest of you gals have. Usually mine is of work nature, that I dont perform well, I am not as good as the others, etc. If you dont turn to our Father in Heaven it gets very destructive so I pray and try to keep things in perspective that way. Thank you Lysa for your great insight! I always appreciate it immensely! Wish I could be there for the web cast but it is during my work hours so I wont be able to.
Inside chatter for me is often in the form of what other women think of me. A very unhealthy thing. Fortunately, God has sent wonderful, true friends. But with my tainted self even in those friendships, the negative chatter creeps in. God is teaching me currently that love always assumes the best. This helps me to think positively about my friends and at the very least turn down the volume on the chatter if not completely turn it off!
Inside chatter can certainly take one to two different ends of the spectrum. One minute I doubt how anyone could possibly love me! And then I think to myself, lots of people love you Julie…send the devil on his way! Because only he would do or say such negative things. Only he wants to interfere with my happiness and not have faith. It’s certainly not always that simple to pull one self out of this negative chatter, but we certainly need to seek God and know how much he loves us. For HE certainly isn’t saying the negative chatter!! HE only praises and lifts us up! Seek Him and He will be found!! How glorious!!
I think that this is probably a problem for most women, and I know it is especially evident in my life. I know I need to replace that empty wrong chatter with the truth of who I am in Christ. I’ve been doing better with this, although its ever present. I’m so thankful that the Lord is bringing me through it, changing me, and helping me to remember that I’m not some worthless piece of junk, but a beautiful creation in Christ!!
I placed a high expectation on myself through high school. I didn’t party, drink, drugs, etc. i got straight A’s and was a top athlete on the teams. I think I believed that everyone held me to that standard and if I didn’t make it I was a disappointment to everyone (parents, teachers, coaches). I am not sure how this perspective came about but I remember very well the incident that started my uphill battle. I tore my ACL during summer league basketball and athletically I wasn’t the same after. That was a huge blow to me and wanting to make my dad proud. I didn’t know who I was anymore if I could compete as I once could! Someone close to me made a joking comment that had no intentional harm but it planted a seed in me that I am still struggling with today:( I did become more involved in youth group and bringing friends after my injury and that I do not regret. I just pray I can be released of the burden I carry to be perfect, not mess up, perfect image, etc and fully accept that I am loved by my Father in heaven, my husband and my family and friends and I do not have to be perfect to receive that!
I deal with this on a daily basis as there is a lot of emotioal and verbal abuse in my past and present. I’m learning to combat this by remembering who I am in Christ, and that I’m not just some worthless piece of junk, but a beautiful creation in Christ! <3
When i realize how i’m feeling because of what i’m thinking, i really try to nip it in the bud. If i feel like i’m not good enough because of what someone said, i go and talk to them and see what they meant. Maybe it wasn’t intended to make me feel not good enough. If I feel like someone is upset with me i really try to go and talk to them and sort it out right away. I don’t deal well with lingering worry, it can get very heavy. Plus it doesn’t give me time to dwell on things and beat myself up even more. And if i’m unable to talk with the person, I ask God what he thinks about me. That never dissapoints. 🙂 Sometimes i do this better then others. Sometimes, i don’t even realize that i’m letting the negative chatter linger.
The negative chatter I most often deal with is in the form of “you just can’t break that habit” or “you just can’t let go of that sinful desire” … but I know fully well that if I just trust God that HE can break those chains!
I so needed that! I can’t wait to listen tonight. I don’t have the book yet.. but I hope to get it soon! I feel like that all I hear in my head some days is the negativity then it shows up on the outside. With me taking my frustration out on the ones I love the most or just being ill… I pray I learn to listen to that still small voice and not the loud chatter … excited to listen and read the book! :)I God bless!
I’m still learning! I’m always saying things to myself that just aren’t true. I know it at the time, I really do, but sometimes chatter from others is more blaring in my mind. What others say doesn’t matter, it’s what God says that I should hold on to. I even reprimand myself for not going to God first, but even as I sit here now, I hesitate…
I am so unbelievably grateful for Gods restoration in my brokenness. In my school days and even into my early twenties I was motivated by my lack of self esteem, listening to the inner chatter telling me I was never going to measure up to those around me and that I should not even try. It kept me from making friends, enjoying activities and just being myself.When I experience that inner chatter these days I know that it is the enemy and I can ask my father in heaven to renew a steadfast Spirit within me! This experience has created in me a desire to seize every opportunity presented to share the love of Christ with others. I remember all too well just how steady that inner chatter can be. In fact, I’m grateful for not forgetting what that inner chatter can be like because it’s now serves as motivation and gives me a heart for others.
Inside Chatter is sometimes self inflicted and sometime the hiss of the devil. I have learned that being audible is the best way to stop the inside chatter. First I tell the devil to flee in the Powerful name of Jesus (He has all power and authority over everything) Second I tell God what is going on and then I Find soemthing to Praise God about.
This redirects my chatter to the One that help and it renews my mind to focus on God not the stuff in the chatter.
Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.
Romans 12:2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will.
I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7)
Awesome!
very encouraging, thank you for sharing. It’s not just about turning the chatter off for that moment, it’s about submitting and laying it at the feet of Christ. Thanks for sharing the Word!
Thanks Rebecca for sharing i will try to do what you are suggesting. I am my own worst enemy.
Thank-you for your encouragement through Proverbs 31 ministry! I can not tell you what how I have been encouraged and blessed through it.
I am looking forward to the video broadcast with Shelia Walsh tonight and thanks for the reminder. Please enter my name in the drawing.
May God’s richest blessings be to you, Lysa and all thoes who are part of your ministry.
Perfect! I was told by my first rapist at 9 yrs old that if I ever told anyone “what I did I will never be loved”. At 15, affter multiple abusers, I told. My fate was sealed. I was never to be loved. And since God saw everything…..even He couldn’t love me because of this horrible thing I did. I wish I’d been excluded from a party.
I’m also 65% deaf. So the noise in my mind is endless. The thoughts, lies, fears, worry and anxiety of being harmed at every turn has taken its toll on me.
Thankfully we have a God who knows everything we go through and LOVES ME ANYWAY!!!
I recently stumbled upon you girls here and I’m so moved by your honesty, candidness and encouragement! Thank you!!! Small steps, but now I’m moving! Well….God is. PTL!
Thanks for all you do at Proverbs 31! You’ve helped so many woman (and men) and you’re devotions are helping me too!
I will come right out and boldly ask….I have no money for the next month and i currently have no food and no gas. I AM trusting God because “He who promised is faithful, if we don’t lose hope”! I would be so blessed to have these books you’re giving as gifts because I can not aaford them but really think they would help me. I pray God agrees.
Blessings to you and all you do!
Anytime negative thoughts fill my head I have an honest conversation with myself to decide if this is truth or a lie. If the thoughts in my head tell me something other than what scripture confirms is true about me, I know it is a lie. Then I tell myself truths about me from what God says in his word – it is freeing.
Today in my devotional reading from my Women’s Devotional Bible this scripture spoke to me about this very battle in my head:
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Is. 55:8-9
Inside chatter is something I have battled ALL. MY. LIFE. Until last year..when the Lord brought me freedom so many of those voices that I let define me for over 30 yrs. Does this mean I don’t still struggle..absolutely not. I do. But it does not control my every thought, moment and mood like it once did. The thing id you do not realize how much control those inside shatter sessions over you–your whole day can be affected. The way you parent your children. The type of wife you are. How you do your work. And most importantly, how you view the Lord and how you feel he views you. I pray I can continue on the journey of getting better at combating these inside voices–and that I can pass that on to my kids!
Negative Inside Chatter only robs me of peace and happiness. Logically I know this; emotionally I have a harder time.
“You’ll never amount to anything.” “You’re never be able to be used by God because you obsess about your health all the time.” “You’re not beautiful, you’re just barely pretty.” “You’re family think you’re stupid.” This is a sample of the “inside chatter” sound in my head. It hurts my heart so much. When thoughts like that come across my mind, I realize it’s not from God but satan. And secondly, I remind myself that God created me and made me absolutely beautiful. I have to surrender this inside chatter to God. It’s a daily surrender…sometimes hourly even. Thank the Lord He is so patient.
I have dealt with negative chatter most of my adult life. It is definitely not good for you. I talk to myself and it is always negative. I have to retrain my brain not to do this. I have so many things that I want to do in my life and that I stop myself from because I tell myself I can’t. I am so looking forward to the webcast tonight to help with my journey with this.
My husband frequently stops my negative inner chatter. He sees me getting upset over something small and asks what I am feeling that is behind my reaction. Many times I didn’t even realize what thoughts prompted the reaction. When I identify it he reminds me of the truth of the situation. If only I were transparent with him more often
Hmm…what have I learned about inside chatter? Probably that it happens more often than I realize. My pastor likes to simplify it for us. He says “You can actually think your thoughts!” We don’t have control over what pops into our heads, but we do have control over what we do with those thoughts. Do we choose to think them, or do we choose to get rid of them?
All I can say is I am learning to move on, to focus on the positive and what God has planned for me. I think so many of us, as children, experienced being left out at some point. To this day I remember one girl, who’s mother was friends with mine, that would talk to me but only because she had to. That hurt. Back then not being popular felt like it defined me. Today I realize God in me defines me. I recently had an interview for an internship (I am 43 and career hunting again). I don’t think the person that interviewed me is a Christian, but she told me she has a string of words she keeps up on her mirror to help remind her that what is in our minds drives us. Words = Thoughts = Feelings = Results. That made me think how important it is to speak God’s word so it resides in us as thoughts to help us with our feelings and bring about results driven by God.
It is always there and you have the “tools” to fight it. The tools God has given us are written in his Word, we just have to remember to look them up and use them often to combat the negative thoughts in our own heads.
I have a daughter who is almost 13 and “negative chatter” is very often a topic of conversation at her age. It’s hard to be the mom you need to be when your little girls feelings are really hurt. I always try to help her understand that maybe there were underlying reasons as to why she wasn’t included and that even though she wasn’t, that doesn’t make her any less the person that God made her to be. She will never be left out in God’s eyes!
Inside chatter is what halts my growth. It keeps me from the overwhelming love of Jesus. By reading “Unglued ” it has helped me work on my listening to the chatter and not believing it any longer.
I never looked at it this way but when they happen too often, it is easy for pink shirt moments to seem like they do define your life. I will use this to help my girls (and myself) clearly separate having a bad day from having a bad life.
I really learned about inside chatter when my husband left for his first deployment. We had been married 3 weeks and I would be at home by myself and when I wouldn’t hear from him for days my mind would fill with doubt what her he would want to talk to me was I a good enough wife ect. It threw me into a depression I pulled away from God and my family. Thankfully I got in touch with a great church and built a strong support system with in it. There are still days where I will be home by myself and the inside chatter will get my doubts going. Praise God that my husband is returning in April this year and God has helped me settle the inside chatter by digging in his word when I’m doubting and overwhelmed. God also helped keep my marriage together despite the inside chatter.
Your not pretty, your not good at sports, you are not smart… all inside chatter from my childhood. Now as an faith filled adult, I am learning that it wasn’t true back then and certainly ins’t true now. I am loved by God and He doesn’t see it the “old” way!!
I have learned to silence negative chatter by making it into a positive. “I’m not pretty enough.” “Oh but God thinks you are beautiful.” Now the negatives don’t come near as often.
Negative Inside Chatter is something I’ve dealt with since a little girl. Always feeling inadequate, or not measuring up… To my parents, friends, family, and husband… Not getting a phone call back, someone saying something that i interpreted wrong… I have learned to pull out my bible and read the Word when the Negative Inside Chatter starts… I’m looking forward to this webcast to get more insight on how to deal with this… =)
I continually am working to ‘corral’ my negative chatter. It does shape you and takes a lot to transform those thoughts into positive ones. I’m looking forward to the webcast. Thanks Lysa for being an inspiration.
I battle negative inside chatter all the time. It’s easy for me to love others, but I really struggle to let others love me in return. Makes for a lonely life. I’ve really been working hard to learn to love myself so that I may understand why my family and friends see what they see and love who they love.
No one ever told me that I can have victory over the negative chatter in my head. For years, I used music and reading to help drown out the “devil on my shoulder.” Now that I am trusting in the Lord and gaining victory over my thoughts, my most important focus is teaching this principle to my teenage daughters so that hopefully they won’t have to suffer the isolation and over sensitivity that I suffered as a teen.
The lies we have been led top believe have dominated my life for years, Gary, stupid,ugly,never amount to anything etc. thankfully I am beginning to get my identity from Christ rather than what people say or I think….
I have been practicing to catch the negative chatter that is in my “ball of wire” and begin to reprogram it with what Jesus Christ says about me. I ask myself, “Where is this coming from?” From there I start to deal with it. It may not be the only time I have to deal with the same negative chatter, but I have started to tear it down and rebuild on the Rock. Thank you for your ministry.
This is huge and I am looking forward to hearing more as this is something I struggle with. Thank you!
What an excellent topic…and how true that we carry those moments that hurt our hearts along with us…to know that the LORD can heals those hurts and remove those wounds and replace them with Joy is an amazing gift which we are given…I am looking forward to the simulcast this evening! I have invited the girls in our Tuesday night study over to my house here in CA for a Potluck and inspiration..can’t wait to share this with them…it’s awesome how women of faith can lift each other up and carry each others burdens and pray each other through whatever situation we are faced with in Life…God is Good and I am blessed! May the Lord guide your words this evening and fill you with the Holy Spirit as you deliver your message, we rebuke Satan -you are not welcome here in this place, in Jesus Name we pray!!
I can sit and listen to the “chatter” in my head all day if I choose. Or, I can listen and believe what God has to say about me. I am his chosen. I am His beloved.
I am what God say’s I am not what the “chatter” say’s I am. I am the head and not the tail, I am above and not beneath.
Something I have struggled with most of my life. Growing up I never seemed to measure up. My sister could do anything she tried & I was “always” hearing her accomplishments shared with others. After we were both out of college we had a conversation one day, only to discover we had both felt the same way. After an abusive marriage have had to really work on seeing myself as God sees me & not giving in to the negative thougths that so easy overwhelm me. Doing better but still hard at times.
Negative “inside chatter” has been a life-long struggle for me. I was blessed w/ a very loving & encouraging mother but another woman & hobbies took my father away from us when I was only 4. I never felt “worthy” or worth-full until I started walking w/ my Lord & Savior, Jesus Christ! But even now, in my 50’s, I struggle every single day to listen to my Lord instead of the enemies within & some from the outside! Running God’s word through my heart and mind is my only weapon! Thanks be to GOD!!!
I myself was one of the little girls without the neon pink t-shirt, although during my childhood we didn’t know what neon pink was. However, I was the oldest child of recent Dutch immigrants – at 6 years old, the oldest of four children.. Even back then, in the 50’s, “clothes” determined who you were. Most of mine were hand-me-downs from family and friends, or things my mother made from clothes that were given to her — she used the clothing as fabric. One item in particular was a wool coat and snowpants made from my great-uncle’s beautiful wool overcoat. However, it was not “in” — and I didn’t even know it back then. Plus, I had the Dutch accent, and white hair. It was the beginning of many years of chatter.
Looking back on it, it was amazing what my mother did with all the things given to her for us. However, I was totally unaware at the time, and really didn’t give it a lot of thought until reading this article. Although I was picked on and teased a lot, I am so thankful my mother was able to do what she did for us. Can you imagine taking someone’s huge, heavy wool overcoat and cutting it down to make a little girl’s snowsuit? I absolutely hated it — yet I had so much to be thankful for. When we are 6 years old, we do not realize the gift our mother has given us … we are more impacted by what our peers speak to us about those blessings.
My parents struggled financially for many years. My father started his own (eventually very successful) business. We were sent to Christian school, which was a tremendous financial burden … especially with tuition for, eventually, six children. My mother budgeted very carefully. Back then there were no “yard sales” — instead second hand clothing was sold through newspaper ads. One of my MOST embarrassing moments in high school was when one of my new classmates (I went to a Christian high school — the only one in our city, and it was fed by about 10 elementary Christian schools in our area) remembered me … and blurted out in front of EVERYBODY that my mom had brought me to her house to buy some of her clothes. The sad thing was that it among my classmates it seemed to be OK to be GIVEN clothes from someone else, but not ok to BUY them. Ohhhh … such chatter … from kindergarten through high school … and most of it coming from classmates in Christian Schools.
I was also tall and extremely thin (I refuse to use the word skinny!), and during elementary school, when everybody was wearing the hip-stitched pleated skirts, I could not keep one on my hips. Although my female classmates had a full wardrobe of them, my sister and I each got one and mine needed to be altered so it would stay on my hips. Again, I did not fit in … I had only one, and it wasn’t “real” because of the alterations.
I realize also, that those feelings stayed with me throughout my whole life … “not cool enough”. Interesting, though, how I am now so PROUD of what my mother did, so PROUD of my Dutch heritage.
However, I do still struggle with the chatter!
Thank you, Lysa — I have the alarm on my phone set to remind me of my “appointment” at 9:00 tonight.
p.s., I have in my closet a Pendleton wool hip-stitched pleated skirt (purchased at the sidewalk sale of a prominent department store) and one from Carson, Pierre, Scott, made in Scotland (purchased at a thrift store). Both are vintage … BEAUTIFUL, and I still wear them, now THANKFUL for the genes that enable me to be “tall and thin”. Maybe I’m compensating for what I didn’t have back then, I’m not sure.
See you tonight!
I have 6 kids…the opportunities for missunderstanding and misscommunication abound in our house! What this has taught me is this, there is always more than one way to see a situation, an answer, a “look”. When training my kids I have often said, “when in doubt, or when there is room for doubt, believe the best”. I have Phillipians 4:8 on our mirror in the bathroom to help remind us what kind of thoughts we should dwell on. Our buddy verse that goes with it is 1Cor 13:4-7, that helps us love like Jesus wants us to and in that verse it says love believes the best 🙂 …now if only I could put this in practice with my husband! I can get stuck in negative thinking about if only I was this or that then he would naturally treat me like this. I know lots of pronouns but it applies to so many things. It is so encouraging to hear other’s struggles, it let’s me know I’m not alone in my funk 🙂 we’ll win if we keep at it and keep receiving grace from the only one that’s perfect! He’s always there to pick us up when we trip on the shoe laces that he has reminded us to tie a hundred times <3
I have to say I’m still trying to learn not to listen to the inside chatter .. Lots to learn, but trying to listen to God’s voice instead of the voice of condemnation.
(I’m having trouble posting this comment – it says it’s a duplicate?)
I have to say I’m still trying to learn not to listen to the inside chatter .. Lots to learn, but trying to listen to God’s voice instead of the voice of condemnation.
As I came across this post this morning I was struck by God’s goodness, His perfect timing, how He truly is my Jehovah Jireh, providing for me what I need in HIS perfect timing. There are a lot of voices in my life lately that have been negative, telling me untruths about myself & piling yet more unrealistic expectations on me. I actually had a few hard phone calls this past week, which I was so excited that I got off & literally audibly voiced truths, “I am accepted in Christ, I am loved unconditionally by Him, I belong to Him, I am clothed in His righteousness” repeating it several times as my emotions were assaulting me, screaming lies, so desperately trying to control me. I was determined I was not going to listen to those voices, my emotions but rather listen to truth – my family deserved to have me present, joyful. I was rejoicing in victory, thankful for His grace, strength that day! My husband even came home & didn’t even know I had a hard phone call! Then I woke yesterday, with great intentions in this heart of mine & it just was a complete disaster …this mamma was completely unglued! The negative chatter that has been happening in this head of mine came to a head…realizing that I’ve been caring too much what people think of me, that I have been thinking about what I think they think, rather than just keeping my mind fixed on TRUTH…He is the truth, and only truth sets us free. I’m not feeling free at all yesterday or today, but thankful that I know He cares, He’s near…being a stay at home mom to small children & a pastors wife there’s not a lot of opportunity for me to get away, to attend conferences so my heart is so overjoyed & thankful that I am able to sit & listen to you woman tonight in my pjs about a subject that I am battling now..Desperately desiring to win, for Him to have the glory. Ministry is hard, it’s a blessing, calling for which I am thankful but my dear hubby needs to come home to a cheerleader, a safe place, a haven. There are many people, situations that beat him up constantly. I awoke today overwhelmed by life, by situations, by this battle raging within but this webcast tonight was His loving arms embracing this daughter of His, reminding me that He is near, He cares deeply, He is carrying me when I am too weak to walk, that He is working in ways I don’t even understand, it’s going to be ok, He truly is enough..enough for every situation in my life, for all that negative head chatter, that if I am still I will hear His voice!
Thank you Lysa for your ministry, you have been such a tremendous blessing to me in my life…I am just finishing up Made to Crave study which helped me so much this past year when we faced a miscarriage…it would have been so easy for me to turn to cheesecake & pasta in my grief but because of that book & the transforming abiding presence of my Lord I was able to look to Him, to find Him to be my comfort & as a plus not gain any more weight & was able to reach another goal of mine, to run 10 km race! Thank you for being so willing, obedient and sharing your heart, life with others, your honesty, tender heart & transparency has been such a blessing, encouragement and tremendous help in my life, thank you for walking with me even though you’ve never meet me! Keep looking to Him to let Him shine through you! I look forward to what He has in store for me tonight!
Inside chatter is a struggle every day. I’m so thankful to have the reminder that I am a new person in Christ. The old nature is leaving my being more and more each day and being filled with the new nature of Christ. Thanks be to God. A song that soothes my soul is Jason Gray’s “I Am New”. A beautiful reminder!
I am very excited to hear this webcast tonight. All my life I have dealt with negative chatter and it has left me a fragile insecure person at times. I feel much fuller in life now that I have Christ in it, but it sadly when it comes to friendships, it doesn’t take much where I find myself feeling left out or questioning things. I then realize how much that makes me pull away from people even though I crave them and want to be a part of their lives. Looking forward to more insight on this!!
The inside chatter is the insecure feeling I get in the pit of my stomach and in my thoughts. I know I am a much harder judge on myself than others are of me. I have to remind myself when a situation arises to stop and remember it isn’t personal, probably unintentional. I try to turn it around and redirect my thoughts to something positive. And take it one step further, I step back and ask myself if this other person may need some support? They may be overwhelmed, stressed or just having a bad day. I believe God wants us to reach out to each other not feel sorry for ourselves!
In my house, we have labeled this negative chatter. It all started with Freddy (the Fretter) who worried about everything. Then there were his cousins, Coulda Been, Woulda Been, and Shoulda Been. Next came his Auntie Scenario and his Uncle Fester Stu. We try not to invite these members of the Worthlesston Family into our home, and when they show up uninvited, we try to point them out as soon as possible and make them leave! It’s amazing, but they do not like laughter and they hate being found out!
Looking forward to sharing this tonight with our women’s study group. we are on week three of “Unglued”. God is good.
I relate with your blog post so much. I remember sitting in a group meeting during a stay in the hospital for being suicidal and the therapist saying that if you had negative self talk that you needed to fire your “mental coach” and get a new one. I came back to group the next day and asked what to do when you fire them and they decide to stay as a volunteer coach. : ) If only it was as simple as letting a negative coach go, but it takes “hiring and training” a new one. That was 12 years ago and thankfully a lot of change and growth have come in my life. Unfortunately, that negative coach still likes to show up on occasion and act like he runs things. It takes effort and conscious redirecting to truth to not let negative self talk dictate what I believe. Glad I can make a choice to choose truth to dwell on… That is life changing!
This is meant to be! I had signed up for the webcast tonight, and had left this page up on the computer! My daughter come in the door off the bus to tell me ( HOW upset she was because she didn’t get chose to go to a birthday party of which she is close friends with this person)- I brought her to the computer of which your page was up and began to read this to her..((tears from me and her))- This would be so helpful for her to get because she struggles with this everyday with her classmates and her school friends/ and also in sports and she is ONLY in the 5th grade! I informed her that we love each other no matter how much negative chatter she gets from them at school/on the field- just to KEEP her head held high and avoid the negative chatter voices!
It helps me deal with inside chatter when I remember that what I do is not as important as who I am.
Cannt wait to listen to this I’m very excited!
I try to “capture” each negative thought and hold it up to the light of God’s Word. Most the times it vanishes but sometimes there is a lesson in there for me. I’m excited to hear the webcasts tonight!!
My inside chatter has gotten easier on me as I have grown older and accepted how God created me, but there are still days.
I’m excited about the website!! I have had very hurtful things that have definitely shaped my “inside chatter”!! Our Mom’s group just finished Made To Crave and have moved on to Unglued. The timing couldn’t be better for both books!!! I am learning to live in imperfect progress and grace!! Thanks for sharing your soul and spirit with us!!
Sometimes I feel like you have published parts of my personal journal. I struggle moment to moment with the chatter going on inside my head. Some …. ok well most of it seems very negative and is usually about myself. I am working on stoping these thoughts and replacing them with how God sees myself. I am a work in progress.
Inside chatter is always there waiting for the down times. That is why it is so important to memorize God’s word so that we can counter attack!
Inside Chatter has led me into many very dark times, with deep depression. It is something I work constantly to overcome. I know that it is the Enemy at the root of it.
I listened far too long to the inside chatter/lies that Satan was trying to convince me was true. God is faithful & I am now free!
I’ve learned to be very selective in the voices I listen to. There are so many with all the news that hits us daily, you can become overwhelmed. If I don’t start my day with the Lord and stay connected to Him, I quickly get off track. After the elections, I decided I needed to turn off the TV and in some cases the radio! Started a Beth Moore Bible Study in James, well that did it, who has time to waste after that? But, I always have had trouble with this mind of mine being a critical one! Ugh! So, it became a daily bringing it back to the “Mindset” of Christ. Pulling me back to transforming my thinking.
Last night at our church’s Women’s Bible Study I found out we are starting “Unglued!” Now how cool is that? Tell me God doesn’t have a hold on my life.
Now if I can just figure out this “Twitter” thing. Where is my granddaughter when I need her?
Looking so forward to tonight at 9PM. You both are wonderful!
I’m really excited for this webcast tonight. When I was in middle school I was tall, extremely skinny, needed braces and couldn’t afford name brand clothes. I had a couple of very close friends, but I wasn’t in the “in” crowd and I always felt left out. My daughter is in her first year of middle school and she says she hasn’t really had to deal with any negative chatter yet…except for a few small things…”why don’t you have any Miss Me’s or UGGs?” Sometimes I think these words eat at me more than they do her…because it takes me back to when I was there. I spend money I shouldn’t spend getting her some of those name brand things just so she doesn’t have to feel as left out and insecure as I did…even though I’ve been teaching her that those are not the things that matter. Anyhow, really looking forward to this webcast!
I just learned of this webcast a few minutes ago, and I quickly signed up. I can’t wait!!!
I often reflect on my childhood and teenage years so that I can better serve the youth of my church. sometimes I think I’m a little too honest and then I see times with them thatp no I have been through what they are going through I can relate. then I thank God for all the things I went through because today I’m making a difference in them .
Looking forward to it!
I have really been struggling with negative “inside chatter” lately… especially when it comes to my kids and my husband. I am able to hold my tongue and keep things from coming out of my mouth, but feel oh so convicted about the condition of my heart. Last week, I memorized 2 Corinthians 10:5: “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God and we take EVERY thought captive to make it obedient to Christ.” I have this verse hanging under my kitchen cabinet to the left of where I wash dishes… so that I can meditate on it time and time again throughout the day. It is certainly helping to take that negative “inside chatter” captive!
Sometimes I wonder how I have managed to make it to 55 with all the negative chatter in my head. Even with all I have learned here, I still hear myself making negative comments about myself. At least now, when I do it, I hear a reminder in my head telling me, “That’s not really who you are, you know. You are Mine, I have bought you with a great price, and you are My great prize.” He loves me. He really does.
I was at a women’s retreat this weekend and learned something that had never really sunk in before…my future is God’s past. HE has already been here. He knows how it ends. He just wants to see how I’m going to deal with the situation. Will I fall back into negative patterns of thinking and behavior, or will I allow the newness of wisdom and the beauty of His love change my reaction? I think that’s what He’s waiting for…to see how I’m going to handle the situation. And somehow, as I choose the path of grace instead of anger, He is going to bring beauty out of the drama and ugliness that I face.
I am past the years of raising my boys and find life calm most of the time; then up sneeks crazy emotions and I may as well be in the process of trying to get the kids out the door to school again. Where is my control? On top of it I am a new Christian; where is my shining light for all to see; those watching the change in my life; the non-believers who should see the His spirit in me not that crazy person. Then the chatter starts; BUT – His strength and help are there and the roar dies down.
I think “inside chatter” is something everyone deals with if we’re honest. I guess that’s why God’s word reminds us to every thought captive…or they can take us and hold us in captivity. Ladies, no matter what happens on earth, we are already chosen, holy & dearly loved (Colossians 3:12).
Negative chatter creates turmoil in my life. I want help to stop it and be more positive!!
It is amazing that in such a busy life so much inside chatter can go on. It’s hard sometimes to not listen to the negative and is a constant struggle. I like what I heard the other day, when that reoccurring thought hits, write it down and put it aside. Wise words.
I dealt with fear of rejection for 30 + years of my life! Every time I would go to a party or be around a group of ladies, the “inside chatter” would begin…”They don’t like you, what are you doing here, no one likes you, why did you say that…” and on and on. It was awful! Then…the Lord. About 2-3 years ago, I finally found freedom from this fear and learned how to defeat the inside chatter. I praise God, it is gone and I know longer listen to this inside chatter. It wasn’t easy, and it was a process of reminding myself over and over again who I am in Christ until the voices quieted and finally left. I am looking forward to hearing this tonight! Love, Sue
Inside Chatter, it is all in the attitude, you can let it get you down or you can turn it around and let it make you stronger. We all have that chance – to think positive – to Let-Go and Let-God shape our hearts.
When my Children (now 27 & 24) went through hard times – I encouraged them to look on the other side, and learn how they might of handled the situation – and learn from it, and don’t become bitter, but better. God has plans, and we need to learn patience. And God will change our hearts!
Looking forward to hearing the talk tonight – thanks!
I suppose, like most people, I’ve been listening to the negative chatter in my head for most of my life. I am just now (at 44) trying to play positive words in my head to take up the space the negative ones fill. So, I’m new to this path and way of thinking – and I can’t wait to see what the Lord will do!!!
Thanks, Lysa, for your words of encouragement. Your “realness” is very appealing!
I have felt these little thoughts lately. I had learned something the other day in my quiet time and felt like I had some real insight into my personality and how I had reacted to a situation a few days earlier with my husband. I planned on talking to him about it and then I started doubting myself. What would his reaction be? Would he think me silly? How would he respond? That fear made it so I couldn’t talk to him about it.
My negative inner chatter has been pulling me down for a long time. I’m realizing that it took a long time to get this way and things won’t change over night, but they will change. I just have to remind myself who I am in God’s eyes and that He works all things for good.
The chatter of negativity was loud in my life. I asked God to cut me of all that was keeping me from him. Oh my, how God is so good.
He has filled my wounds completely. I am looking forward to what he has in store for me.I am his and he is mine. I am 58.
I too struggle with inner chatter…i wonder why I can’t find any friends like I had before we moved. I worry and wonder about why my daughter wasn’t invited to a birthday party and beat myself up over it. I need to remember that I am chosen by HIM, and nothing else should matter!!
The chatter of negativity was loud in my life. I asked God to cut me of all that was keeping me from him. Oh my, how God is so good.
He has filled my wounds completely. I am looking forward to what he has in store for me.I am his and he is mine. I am 58.
negative chatter… i’ve recently learned that thinking patterns do actually create a physical (chemical?) pattern in our brains and that science shows it’s difficult to redirect thought processes away from those patterns formed over years and years. based on my own experience with negative thought patterns, i can believe this could be true. what helps me the most to redirect my thoughts is prayer and scripture memorization. years ago i was seeing a christian psychologist for anxiety and depression. she suggested i memorize a favorite verse or song lyric or quote, something having to do with peace, to recite to myself when i started to feel especially anxious. that was my first experience in memorizing scripture, before i was into “Bible study.” that verse stuck with me (philippians 4:6-7) and now, years later, i have memorized many more. it’s a difficult thing to get myself to do sometimes, when i’m especially bogged down by the negative chatter i’m hearing (doubting God is the worst, for me). it requires some work, effort on my part, to redirect my thoughts to what is pure and lovely and excellent. but it works every time. and when i’m consistent in praying and reciting the scripture i’ve memorized, i find myself in a much more stable state of mind… it’s that peace that passes all understanding, guarding my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus!
Bam! That one hit me right between the eyes, Lysa!! I have been praying this afernoon about those “voices” in my head that keep me from being all that I know I should know that God calls me to be (yes, I meant to say it that way). I must confess, I am finishing up the last OBS on GREATER and on just read the part saying that you are not alone. But I feel alone. Alone with my thoughts. Alone with the negativity. Alone. Gratefully, I am uplifted when I can cross the room to my computer and not feel so alone anymore. Your ministry is a true lifeline for me, as well as many others certainly. I look forward to the webcast tonight! Many thanks.
Reading this blog post has actually just brought a new awareness to my “inside chatter” that I don’t think I ever noticed before. It was the party invite example that grasped my attention and drew me in. I have been sulking in thoughts of not being liked, chosen or wanted, all because of an upcoming Superbowl Party that I know about and have many friends who have been included, but I am not one of them. It’s amazing how I let my identity be determined by the absence of one invitation, or lack of. I completely forgot about who I am in Christ. Thank you for that reminder. I suppose this is why the Bible tells us to take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ.
I tried to not let the inner chatter bother me but you know the devil and try to get in any way possible. I let the devil know I am one of God’s children and for him to get behind me. That helps me more then anything. Thanks for the encouraging words on this.
As a Pastor’s wife and a busy Mom of 6, I often struggle with the “inside chatter”. I am striving to see myself the way that God sees me…precious, beloved, beautiful. I always tell my 2 teenage daughters that your worth is not defined by someone else’s opinion of you, but by God’s opinion of you, and that just because someone says something about you, it doesn’t make it truth. Our worth as individuals comes from being daughters of the KING, and that’s what makes us who we are. So looking forward to the webcast!
I have found that I can discern and refuse the negative inside chatter when I am getting exercise and spending time in God’s word…what do ya know!!!? Duh! Of course those darts from the enemy come when I’m already tired, down, overwhelmed, feeling lost, emotional, hormonal, etc… I’ve been through rollercoasters of experiences but my most recent shining from the Lord was one day I was working on some household chores and some thoughts came in about how another sister in Christ didn’t like me or want to spend time with me (for no real reason except that she hadn’t contacted me in a looooong time and wasn’t as responsive to my attempts to get together as I would have liked). Well, I realized right then and there I had a choice, 1) to accept this negative inside chatter and decide I was not worth her time and she must not be interested in seeing me so I would now no longer contact her and feel awkward around her…OR 2) I could see the thoughts for what they are: DARTS from Satan and REFUSE to believe them or let them take ground in my thoughts. What I did that day? I said “Lord, these thoughts need to GO to the cross. You dealt with them. They are from the source of death. You are the resurrection life and I claim LIFE and peace for my mind instead of these darts. You know what? I was able to let go of all resentment toward that one and I visited her (I initiated) that next week. Later it became clear to me that there was nothing wrong on her end toward me, and she NEEDED me to reach out. If I had listened to my insecurities and Satan’s darts, we were wouldn’t have cultivated the friendship the Lord has grown. I would love to win this giveaway. I actually have the book “Unglued” because I bought it last summer. What I really need now is Made to Crave…but that’s another story… 😉
Gosh, I have found that inner chatter can make me my own worst enemy. I’m not good enough for whatever is going on; the mistakes I’ve made are the reasons things are not working out right now; oh so many etcs. But what I have realised and what is so wonderful about our God is that He does not keep lists of our failures; anything we have brought to Him to ask forgiveness for is forgotten! Now if we could only do that for ourselves, but we keep going back to our mistakes. I do wonder how many times this little voice is the voice of the devil trying to keep us down? I fight hard against it but some times it is so hard to ignore.
I have been on a 3 year journey learning to control the chatter. It’s actually been a lifetime journey & continuing process, but the last 3 years have been a period of accelerated growth spiritually & personally. I pretty much grew up in church, but the trials in my life the past 3 years have challenged me to step out of my reserved comfort zone, as well as, humbled me to search myself. During this process, I have had to really dig deep & learn who God says I am, how He sees me & not focus on what others might think, react, or what they might say. My joy has to come from Him & not dependent on circumstances or others around me. I am still a work in progress & still struggle at times when circumstances try to take my focus. I want my children to learn to quiet the chatter now in their young lives. To know they have a choice, to know how God sees them & loves them….
Hi! just read your blog-thank you! I have found that sometimes this negative inside chatter is something that i have heard someone else say out loud about themselves. Especially if it someone you spend alot of time with like a parent. I have found myself thinking negative things about myself that i have heard my mom say about herself. What we say can really influence others.
As a child most of my inside chatter was positive. It is only after becoming a parent that it has turned negative. Hind sight may be 20/20 but it can also makes us question our abilities and can affect our inside chatter if we look back too often. As believers we have been forgiven of our sins – God doesn’t constantly replay them over and over – we do it ourselves with not one positive outcome. I am thankful that He doesn’t dwell on them and wish I could stop. It’s very hard to do when you feel someone is living with the consequences of your sin. How do you forgive yourself and go on when they are suffering?
I have struggled with fybromalgia since I was 18 years old. Sometimes my pain and symptoms make days very horrible for long stretches of time. God has really shown me some new things in the past 6 months to help my health so that have helped a lot. Recently my stomach was really bad for about a week and half and it kept getting progressively worse as the days went on and I felt like all’s I could think about was how bad I felt. When I started to feel better, I realized that when I’m feeling bad physically, it’s hard to stay positive mentally. A friend revealed to me that she thought that when I felt bad, that Satan would make me feel discouraged and try to take the joy and victories I have found over this illness. Satan knows our insecurities and how to make us feel down and is so sneaky in his attacks. I am so glad I have God on my side with dealing with all of this and can’t imagine dealing without without the great husband and friends I have and a Savior who really carries me through it all.
I have learned that if I dont combat my chatter w/the Word,it becomes overwhelming and becomes all that I focus on
I’m not sure if it’s age or the wisdom of God’s word sinking in but I find that the negative chatter can lessen as the years go by. I know He is able to take control of every aspect of my life, even my thoughts and accomplish good works through me His humble servant.
Wow! I am so excited about listening to the webcast tonight. I still get so upset about those small moments which still do happen quite often in my life. I try so hard to include others and make sure no one feels left out because I so know how it feels. I guess I set myself up for failure when it happens again. I am doing the Bible Study “Becoming the Woman got Wants me to Be”. It is transforming me and I am so thankful. I am so tired of allowing my self worth to dare be challenged by other people’s actions.
The constant chatter rings in my ears like a bell . The negative thoughts of acceptance from people who don’t really matter . I need to focus on the truths of God. And let the negative stuff go. Thanks so much for your encouraging words .
What I’ve learned about inside chatter is to try not to act on, or dwell on, the first words I hear. So often, Satan is much louder than Jesus. So I try to be still and listen for the voice behind the chatter.
God is good! All the time! But that chatter wants me to hear something different. It wants me to be defeated when I’ve just had to speak to my 93 yr old dad in a tone I would have gotten ripped for in the past. I get so weary my guard goes down and all the negative comes flooding in. But I love being reminded that in spite of what I see, or how I feel , the reality is God is good! All the time! (said w a smile and a heavy sigh)
Inside chatter keeps me awake almost ever night. I get in bed exhausted then lay there for hours what I should have done & said differently, how make the situation better tomorrow, make up a bunch of scenarios about how it could go next time. It is exhausting. I call it busy brain. What I have been trying recently is that when it starts instead of thinking about how to fix, I give it over in prayer again & again until I’m not thinking any more about it. Then I give thanks for the love that cannot be snuffed out by chatter.
Words and actions are so hurtful. Praise be to JESUS alone, HE is the ultimate healer of those hurtful times. Working in a middle school I see it all to frequently. Praying always!
I had to stop in to say how powerful this was for me. As I have sought the Lord in this area, I have made a great discovery. I have to confess that I think this inside chatter all too often impacts not only my relationships with others, but it affects what I think God thinks about me too. At times, I have even felt overlooked by Him, like He wants to hand out those “Birthday Party T-Shirts of Blessing” to all of my friends, but somehow He doesn’t want to invite me in to His innermost circle because I don’t quite measure up in certain areas. Quite obviously, I KNOW this is not truth, but I am frequently (lately) found feeling like, “God might do that for someone else, but He wouldn’t do that for me”. I have to catch myself and bring my thoughts back into alignment with His Word. I have been confronted in this area lately. One on a church sign near my house, which states, “Self pity is rooted in pride”. That is something to ponder for sure! The other today was that I should not be identified by the sum of who I feel like I am, but in reality, I need to find my identity in the sum of the truth of God’s Word. His Living Word – ALL TRUTH – lives in me as His Holy Spirit. You have yet again been used to confront this place in me. I also know now that I am not alone in these thoughts! That’s good:)
Thank you for this post! I teared up thinking about how I’ve lived most of my 40+ years of life with this type of thinking. I experienced something in Kindergarten that made me believe that I was unlikable, boring, uninteresting, and unattractive. This thinking affected most of my relationships. Then I met Jesus and realized that I have value because He created me fearfully and wonderfully. Managing my chatter is not only daily but minute by minute. But it helps me draw closer to Christ by causing me to stay in the Word and reading HIs promises.
What I’ve learned about inside chatter is it is insidious, slipping into my thoughts unbidden & casually like an old friend. I have to be so diligent to recognize it & so disciplined to throw it down. I’ve gotten better dismissing inside chatter, all glory to God for the work He is doing in me.
My inside chatter is directly related to my time in the WORD – and whether I hurry through reading or really let it soak into my heart!
“Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, & he will flee from you, ” (James 4:7). Why does it take us so long to realize these words are TRUE?? Lord, help me to remember, especially in the heat of the battle; & help all my sisters in the Lord who fight this same battle daily; & give us, no, remind us & help us to claim the victory!
Inside chatter is such a battle for me…I know I am loved, chosen, cherished, and and an heir of God’s, but sometimes I listen to the negative thoughts and feel so alone. I know I’m not alone, but I wish I could not be so swayed by these negative thoughts and their negative influence on my heart, mind, and soul. When I take the focus off of me, and focus on Christ, I can be reminded again of his promises and who He says I am.
There is always a fight inside my head with negative chatter! When I feel it coming, I practice “walking away” from it by digging into a good book, a craft, motivational CD or podcast. It Is finding something that will distract me from having that negative conversation! The most important thing that has helped is getting into the Word more and more. All that truth pushes out the negative! 🙂
I cannot wait for this webcast. Involved in “Unglued” right now & loving it. This webcast is very timely for me!!!! Thank you!
In 7th grade I tried out for the volleyball team because I was told by a few other girls that they thought I was a good player. They had seen me play during gym class and I have to say I felt I did have a pretty good serve. My downfall, I was overweight. The heaviest girl in both 7th and 8th grade. I was the girl teased everyday because of my weight and made to feel worhtless and ugly. I thought if I made the volleyball team I could be excepted. Well when tryouts were over there was only room for one more girl on the team and it came down to me and one other girl who was popular, pretty and skinny and I felt not as good a player as me, well guess who made the team. It wan’t me. I was devasted and I knew I really should have been the girl picked. A few other girls mentioned to me that they thought I should have been the one choosen. That was 35 years ago and I have come a long way with the help of my Savior to combat my negative chatter in my mind. So, I know how Lysa felt by not getting the pink tee shirt! That’s exactly how I felt not making the team. I am growing so much in my relationship with Jesus. I came across Lysa’s book “Crave” in late November of 2012 and I am still in the process of reading and studying it. Our lives are so parallel. I can relate to every sentence she wrote. Thank you Lysa for your experience, knowledge and love for us “Jesus Girls” who need inspiration from other women like yourself. Looking forward to the similcast tonight! PS~ The Women of Faith Christmas similcast was amazing! Mary
Sometimes its hard to understand why people make us left out..but this article helped me understa..nd that these are little things and situations compared to the joy God has to offer us..When we have God in our hearts..the little things don’t matter.
So need to hear this Simulcast on the chatter than goes on inside my head! I am my own worst enemy. Asking for Wisdom and Revelation so this can be conquered in Jesus’ name. Amen
One of the most valuable lessons I am learning is that emotions & feelings are not always accurate. This is such an important topic for women!
I’m learning that the loud voices that clamor for my attention are not the ones that I need to listen to. God speaks to me in a still, small voice. I need to filter everything through the truth of God’s word.
I have been receiving your devotionals for about two years and have truly been blessed by the incredible insight you and your staff have about today’ issues we women face. I also have purchased some of your books and passed them along to other women who have received answers to some of the problems we all seem to encounter. May God continue to bless you and Proverbs 31 ministries in all you set out to accomplish. I’m looking forward to tonight’s webcast and hopefully a chance at the drawing of the prizes.
Always had negative chatter. My mom was very negative. If I had a pink shirt it should have been blue. I could go on but I won’t. I was a member of a prayer group. Many of the women prayed beautifully. One night I was praying, asking The Lord whi I could not pray like them. My Lord answered in a still quiet voice not heard by my ears but in my heart and said, ” you are you and I am I be yourself and know that I love you.”
Needless to say I figured if I was good enough for Him I was good enough.
Thanks be to God
I’ve had so many “sans pink t-shirt moments” myself. I grew up in a small town with the same core group of eight to nine friends from K-12. When there was an odd number I seemed to be the one left out. I didn’t get invited to things often. I grew up in a broken home with an unstable mom. I had self esteem issues that have never really gone away. Like you I’ve carried these feelings and labels around on my shoulder my entire life and I’ve let the define me. Thanks for sharing this devotional and helping me to see that they don’t define me! I am complete in Christ and I need to fi day self worth in Him and only Him!
Inside chatter has always been a constant inside me, pulling me into my own self-made shell, away from everyone…especially my friends (what few l did have) & my family. The most amazing & beautiful thing happened on September 23, 1979~God’s voice spoke louder than any others & I answered his call, accepting His ultimate gift! At that very instant, all the chatter just stopped! I heard nothing but the Holy Spirit, it was the most beautiful thing l ever had happen to me~until l was baptized a week later. When l was lifted up out of the water, all the burdens l was carrying were lifted from my very core-gone for good because of Gods unconditional love for me! Not only did He give me the ultimate gift of His salvation, He gave me the peace and the joy to start loving others that I never could do before. To this day, 33 years later, l still remember that “lifting of my soul”! And His blessings flow through me to everyone around me. Thank you Lord Jesus for Your ultimate sacrifice so that l may live eternally in Your grace.
I’ve learne that inside chatter I hear are lies from the enemy meant to bind me in chains of self deprecation!
I have struggled with negative chatter my whole life. I was an only child, and always felt unwanted, unworthy, etc. I know Jesus loves me but sometimes the negative chatter gets loud and hard to get away from.
I am so excited about the webcast. I just signed up and hope it is not too late. When I heard what the topic was about I knew I had to listen to it. I constantly battle the thoughts in my mind that I am not good enough, pretty enough, skinny enough, or smart enough to make it in whatever I’m aiming for in this world. Fortunately I know that as a sinner I will never be good enough and that is ok because Christ died that I may live. It is through Him that I can claim my identity.
Oh the lies and the deceitful ways of the enemy in “inside chatter”!! When I didn’t keep my thoughts captive as I should have according to God’s word (2 Corinthians 10:5), the chatter that went back and forth in my head steered me toward a dark and unknown place, depression. I believed the lies and built stories inside my head over situations that were, yes, bad and negative toward me via gossiping, but instead of looking past it and giving it all to God to handle, I held onto them and built a fortress in my head for a city headed to destruction. Instead of diving into the Word, I dived into self centeredness and self absorption. Instead of practicing to have a grateful heart and spirit, I turned my usual positive outlook in life into a hardened spirit, an untrusting way of looking at life and others, when all I needed to do was to deposit all my trust into Jesus!! If any of you start to hear the lies of the enemy in your inside chatter, extinguish the noise by diving into God’s truth!
My negative talk is so much a part of me I don’t even notice right away that it’s happening. We are to “guard our hearts” I want to stop having to guard myself from myself
I think for me, after going through some difficult personal challenges when trying to get pregnant, I started to let those challenges define me and it permeated in every area of my life. So the negative chatter affected my marriage and what I thought about myself as a wife, what I thought about myself as a mom and homemaker and what I thought about myself as a business owner. But I eventually realized that that is NOT at all what God thinks of me. To Him I am special, one of a kind, blessed beyond measure, safe, worthy and special. So I began to praise HIM in all circumstances and find some positive in everything, regardless of what the situation was. Ultimately those negative thoughts went away and while I am well aware that I am not perfect, I know WHO’s I am and I walk in that every day. (Although some days my inner self still tries to get to me.) But it doesn’t work because I employ power thoughts about myself and I realize it’s just satan trying to distract me and take me away from my purpose.
I heard the life altering comment from my father … a painful comment about my future and how I would be qualified to “earn a living”. I let that define me for a long time, but finally came to know my heavenly Father … He spoke words of love and value into my heart. They took a while to sink in, but once they did, I came to realize my value to Him and to the rest of the world. I am grateful!
Inside Chatter…I don’t remember ever NOT hearing it. It remains something i fight every single day and keeps me from being all i can be. I know all the right “things” in my head…but i cannot seem to get them into my heart.
Negative chatter for me seems to abound when it’s time for my monthly!
My negative inner chatter can be absolutely paralyzingl if I allow it. That’s why I’m learning how critical it is to take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. If it doesn’t line up with who He is and what He says then TOSS IT. And the sooner, the better. Soaking myself in God’s Word, helps to cleanse my heart, from the negative influences, no matter where they come from.
I am a 60 year old loving, caring lady. I also love to talk and give details. As I have grown older, I am realizing how many of my close friends, and immediate family members are telling me to stop talking as they don’t care, aren’t interested, or don’t have time for details. “Get to the point” they say, Or even at times I have heard “shut up, I don’t want to hear it as it doesn’t interest me”. To me this is sending my inside chatter into overtime details to my brain that I am not interesting and people don’t like me talking about what interstest me. Does that mean all my friends and family are only into themselves? Makes me wonder. I have been telling them that this is who I am. This is the way I was when they met me and chose to be my friend. What else can I do to not annoy them but still be true to who I am?
Rita
I am working hard to put the negative chatter in gods hands whenever I catch myself listening to the thoughts in my head. I have found that not only are they self defeating but they destroy relationships! My own negativity can sabotage relationships because I see them through the eyes of an unloved person rather than seeing them as the precious gifts of friendship and love god wants them to be.
Lately, I have been trying to stop my chatter and ask myself if I would think that thought about someone else and if it is fair to be that critcal of myself and view myself as lacking. Once I confront myself and stand up for myself, the chatter usually backs down. 🙂
Wow! God is amazing! I’ve struggled with inside chatter almost my whole life, certainly as far back as elementary school, and that was a lot of years ago! One of the many things I chastise myself about is always being behind on e-mail, seems I’m always way behind, but I “just happened” to check yesterday and saw the e-mail about the webcast and also this article. I had tears in my eyes reading it! I felt like I was back in school standing by my locker trying not to notice the laughing groups that I was included in. It is amazing that God always makes sure we are “on time” when we really need to be. So many unread e-mails and I happened to read this one “just in time!” I can’t wait for the webcast! Thank you Lisa! Thank you, Lord!
Negative chatter inside has been struggle my whole life. I know it is only through Christ that I can ask for help to quiet things down.
I have read both, Made to Crave & Unglued. Thank you for writing the books. My inside chatted kept me from recognizing that as a daughter of God, I wasnot /am not a failure, that I am beautiful, inside and outside. I am in counseling and reading your book helps me affirm my own worth. I am in a Bible & book study with a group on Sparkpeople, we are reading your “Unglued ” now and in the past have studied your “Made to Crave “. Thank you & God ble
I have, unbeknownst to me, been listening to “negative chatter” all my married life about being a Proverbs 31 woman. My inmost being wanted to be a homemaker, a doting wife and mum but the “chatter” came from both outside and inside my head. But now I am free! I have been given permission to be a woman after God’s own heart (through Proverbs 31 Ministries) by being the best stay-at-home mum that I can be with Jesus!!! There is such a freedom in my mind to let my inmost desires out without fear. I am allowed to be me. I had bought into the lie, again unknowingly, that I had to just concentrate on academics with our 6 children. I am now free to just have fun, get dirty, make things and teach my girls the art of homemaking. Now when the “inside chatter” comes, i can now say the truth against it. “The truth will set us free” John 8:32. Praise Jesus for you all! “There is now no condemnation!” Thank you, thank you, thank you all. You have broken down a major wall in my life. I look forward to learning so much more from you all. How great is our God!!! (My husband is wondering why I am so excited, ha ha ha)
Though I’m a work in progress, I’ve learned that my “inside chatter” doesn’t determine who I really am. It may affect my mood or a reaction, but if I focus on God’s Word once the chatter begins…it can be silenced. It’s HARD and I fail often, but God’s there to whisper what He sees in me and who I am in Him. He sees Christ because Christ is my identity…not because of me but because of Him.
Thanks for the encouragement and reminder to meditate on the TRUTH – and not the lies. Looking forward to the webcast. 🙂
I decided to deal head on with negative chatter last year after spending a lot of time with a couple, ( both who were friends and neighbors), struggle with and lose the battle to cancer and cirrhosis of the liver,at the age of 59. It was a huge wake up call to really work on my marriage and my “chatter” that says things will never get better. After intense counseling and a very hard road to go down, I can say it was worth it. But oh how easy it is to let the enemy creep in and put me back in those ruts of 35 years of doing marriage the wrong way. God is faithful.
This story is awesome & the webcast sounds like it’ll be beneficial to all those who listrn
I know the inside chatter is in all of us. It may come when we’re drifting away from God so we just have to turn to God to get rid of it. Get back into His Word & pray, pray, pray.
Wow! I can totally relate. I am a 43 year old women who has struggled with negative thoughts about myself since my parents divorce at the age of 12. How devasting those words can be to a life meant for so much more. I praise God that I have learned how powerful the mind can be when it chooses to focus on God’s word. I am treasured and loved beyond measure! I choose to let my thoughts br what the words of Philipians 4:8 tell me. I choose to no longer let my thoughts be of anything less than God’s best!
Thanks, Lysa for bringing to light the reality of inside chatter. From Eve in the Garden to me today in 2013, inside chatter destroys our effectiveness! God’s Word is our only weapon!…planted in our heart to rush out that nastiness & replace it with His Truth!
The negative chatter I hear is constantly, I’m not good enough of a mom, wife, friend, etc.
I’ve really had to focus on God’s words when I find myself going down that negative path, comparing myself to someone else, trying to live up to someone’s expectations, trying to be supermom or whatever the case may be. I have struggled with being “good enough” for so long, when I hear God’s beautiful truths he’s telling me through scripture, it’s hard to accept, but daily, moment by moment at times, it’s starting to get through my thick skull. I am enough, because God made me and that is what I need to be, happy and content to be His child and to trust in Him for what I need. But it’s hard in this life, and I still struggle continuallly with the negative chatter. I am so excited about this webcast! Hopefully, I will gain some insight and new strategies to fight it! Thank you ladies for being the faithful Women of God he has made you to be!
Thank you for writing both “Made to Crave” and “Unglued”. I have always had negative internal chatter, and know as an adult I am trying to change my negative chatter to positive internal chatter. Reading your book has given my insight and relief in knowing that others have struggled with negative internal chatter. On Sparkpeople, I am participating in a Bible & book study using your “Unglued”. I am enjoying reading it (and listen to is, since I also have the audio version) and discussing what we see in ourselves regarding your book. Last year (2012) I participated with the same group reading your “Made to Crave” book. I am applying what I learn from both of your books in my daily life; each day is a new day. Thanks and God Bless.
I may be too late, but reading your post today really caught my eye. I was having those very feelings today – I was not invited to a wedding that I thought I should have been invited to. Sounds pretty funny doesn’t it. But when you compare this to being complete in Christ, this is so small in comparison. Thank you.
Thank you for writing both “Made to Crave” and “Unglued”. I have always had negative internal chatter, and know as an adult I am trying to change my negative chatter to positive internal chatter. Reading your book has given my insight and relief in knowing that others have struggled with negative internal chatter. On Sparkpeople, I am participating in a Bible & book study using your “Unglued”. I am enjoying reading it (and listen to is, since I also have the audio version) and discussing what we see in ourselves regarding your book. Last year (2012) I participated with the same group reading your “Made to Crave” book. I am applying what I learn from both of your books in my daily life; each day is a new day. Thanks and God Bless.
I have a hard time remembering that they are just “moments, and moments shift, people are fickle and people shift.” They become such big parts of me that I let them run my life and forget the good and only remember the bad. With the help of several people I am trying to forget the “moments” and remember the good memories.
I appreciate the insight from Lysa’s book Unglued regarding true transformation in Christ. I have realized that replacing the negative inside chatter with specific scripture verses is the best way to quiet those recurring thoughts and transform my life to be more Christlike. I have been more deliberate in memorizing verses and using them when negative memories, emotions and thoughts creep into my reality. I have hope that over time and with consistent usage, that scripture will be first in my mind instead of the relenting chatter.
I can hardly wait to read the book. Negative chatter comes to me when I’m not doing anything.
I think Satan is behind the negative chatter and is the 1 who keeps repeating the chatter & making situations seem worse than they really were every time he replays them in my mind!
The inside chatter that plagued me for years is:
“Are you REALLY saved…..are you SURE?” This doubt plagued and crippled my growth as a Christian. It wasn’t until I took the time to study 1John for myself, that I was able to fight the enemy with Scripture every time those doubts crept into my mind. I am so thankful that I am HIS, and that I do not need to fear that He will EVER leave me or forsake me!
My “inner chatter” would like to convince me I’m -less…. hopeless, worthless, loveless…. What helps me overcome this is to remind myself that what’s TRUE about me is what God says about me.
So glad my Heavenly Father’s words can overcome they negative chatter in my life!
I relate the inside chatter to those wind-up sets of teeth that keep clacking and clacking as long as we deal with it by giving it the time and energy to keep them going. When those moments occur, it is my hope to be able to stop “winding up the teeth” and give more energy to the gifts that God has given me…the positive people in my life, the quiet moments of reflection and His word to guide me through the ever so tough times.
Negative Inside Chatter for me is torture. I feel like my entire day and night is consumed with these negative thoughts. If I am not thinking hateful thoughts about me I am having hateful thoughts about other. Or to be more specific. I dislike them for what I think they mean or how they think of me. Its not like I am trying to accomplish something then this happens it happens all the time. Sometimes I think I have a mental problem or I am possessed.
Sorry, I didn’t finish. I have learned that inside chatter are just the Devil trying to keep me down and keep me from knowing or accomplishing Gods goals for me.
Sometimes I hear that negative chatter; but I can generally chase it out by reminding myself, “Jesus knows the truth. He understands. This is not a battle with you and that other person; it is a spiritual battle between you and the wicked one. And…….I have overcome by the blood of the Lamb and MY TESTIMONY! I am so special to God!” It is so amazing how things look so different when I look through “God’s glasses”!
The voices in my head are typically old negative reruns. And i shouldnt be listening to them….
I would never tolerate someone else talking to me as harshly as I talk to myself sometimes. The key thing that I am trying to work on is giving myself grace. Currently, I’m in week 4 of the Unglued study and am becoming more and more aware of my mental dialogue.
The chatter in my head is often centered around my fear of cancer. So many around me have battled this disease, some have won, but many others have not. The enemy is using this constant reminder against me, and I realize that by allowing these thoughts in, it takes the time away from when I should be focusing on the things of God. But I can’t make it stop!
This couldn’t have come at a better time. That’s why God’s timing is perfect. I need to get the negative chatter out of my head. I have been like the girl in the story so many times who was left out.
Inside negative Chatter can be hurtful for us women. From the time we were little girls to old age we girls have the same problem. When we hear that “the girls” got together without us for a movie or whatever, in comes the inside chatter. Guys never care about this stuff! It’s real to us, and it hurts. It helps me to have my personal book selections handy.I keep certain ones on my inspirational shelf in my family room.I have several titles from “Sheila Walsh’s Favorite Books” and thanks Lynn for your book “Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl” .All of your wonderful writings give me such good insights into “INSIDE CHATTER” that is pleasing to my Heaverly Father. I stop listening to the negative chatter and start to READ. I know I need to stop thinking of myself and the negative unhappy chatter. It’s not easy, but when I pray for the Holy Spirit to fill my mind and body, new energy and positive prayers come to my mind. It’s a very good reminder of who I want to have “in charge ” of my life.
With gratitude and love to all the team of “Women of Faith” (See you tonight at the Web broadcast.)
Joanie
This really hits home for me. Now as wife and mother and 48 years old I have struggled all my life with self esteem issues and mainly only thoughts that I have of myself. I struggle with eating issues that over years has become an issue…eating just is not important to me. I grew up going to church but never was a priority in my life so I feel over the last year I am a new person in Christ. I am so blessed to have been introduced to this website.
My brownies don’t look as good as the other mother that brought brownies to school. My cake for the cake walk looks lazily slapped together compared to the other cakes. The grey in my hair is showing. The wrinkes around my eyes are getting worse. I’m not as good as the other ladies in church because I didn’t sell as many tickets to the chili cookoff. My car is dirty so my house must be dirty too! And on and on and on. It never stops. We think when we leave high school that comparing ourselves to others and not ever adding up, goes away. We are a grown women now; self-confident and sure of who we are. But, we aren’t. We constantly, in our own heads, compare ourselves to everyone and everything around us. I am looking forward to this session tonight!
the biggest thing i learned about insider chatter is i am not alone. which is funny because logically i know God is always with me, but emotionally sometimes i do let those chatters get to me. i love your readings and feel that sometimes you are sitting in my living room acting out my life.
I am learning to lean into Jesus. As I do I see that his “chatter” about me or for me always lifts my head & lifts my spirit!
I have been battling the negative chatter in my head for years. I have found that changing the people we put in our live really makes a huge difference. I have been able to pick up on key “triggers” for myself, whether its the things people say or the attitudes they have, and realize that those words DO NOT define me. It has been a very difficult road to re-write the tape in my own head but small changes over the years has made a huge difference. If I mess up, it does NOT mean I am a failure!! It just means try again 🙂 I am Blessed to have a GREAT Man of God for a husband who has really helped me in this over the years. 🙂
I am OVER my inside chatter. I can just be finishing a devotional and it creeps up within minutes! I can’t wait for tonight’s webcast and to hear Lysa’s humorous wisdom!!
Inside Chatter to me is not letting go of things that happen…when someone treats me wrong or makes me feel bad. i just cannot let it go. I become Unglued quickly and say things and mainly think things that are totally against what I know and what God has showed me time and time again. I continue to think about these things and what I would like to do or say. I am reading Unglued right now and I feel like it has TRACI written all over it and that it was written just for me,
It’s hard to not listen to the negative chatter when my life doesn’t fit anything the world says it should be… I’m not married or dating, I am almost 30, I don’t have a real “career”… These voices often drown out the still small voice that I usually forget to listen for.
I have learned that what the people of this world think of me, causing all that chatter in my head, does not matter. What matters is that I am a Child of God and what He thinks is all that matters. Now I’m not saying this is easy, I’m just saying I remind myself of this several times a day, everyday. I also try to surround myself with other Children of God, because it is much easier to be lifted up when you are lifting others.
I am truly blessed and all the glory for that goes to my Daddy. Thank you Fatther in Heaven.
Growing up I always felt defined by “negative” inner chatter. I told myself that I would never do anything right, that no one loved me, and that everyone would leave me! I went through so many bad relationships! Convinced myself I did not deserve any better! As a child I watched my mom do the same thing. My dad left when we were young and she did her best, but she had such a low self esteem. Long story short, I let her relationships and the one with my father convince me that I was not good enough. Until one day, I read a verse in God’s Word and it was an ah uh moment! (Psalm 139:14) In 2006, I got saved. I started listening to my heavenly fathers voice and He whispered love into my heart! I finally started to love myself for the first time in my life! I am now married to a wonderful man with three beautiful children. Occasionally, I feel that wrong inner voice trying to creep back in, but I now have God’s voice to quite it and remind me that, He loves me and I am “fearfully and wonderfully” made! 🙂 Thank you so much of reminding me of that with this webcast! Be blessed!
I lead a group of girls at church. Our theme is about negative inside chatter. Here we call it “stinken’ thinken'”. We teach the girls to test their thoughts to Phil 4:8 and if it doesn’t pass the test they must exchange “stinken thinken” for “right thinken”. We learn what those negative thoughts lead to and how to exchange them to positive thoughts based on God’s word. I am learning and growing just as much as they are! Negative chatter binds us, but the Truth sets us free!!
My “inside chatter” is still causing me distress. I TRY to replace it with positive, affirming words…but it’s a struggle…I would love to read Unglued & I am praying for God to fill me & make me BELIEVE I am worthy; as HIS daughter! To Him be the glory!
I need all of the reinforcement here i can get. I have major problems with negative inside chatter so much that sometimes it is deafening. I am meaner to myself than i would ever think of being to anyone else, in fact my biggest enemy is me and i just can’t seem to stop it or break the cycle. I also have many medical problems which i’m sure don’t help. I would love to win a book that may further help me out and help me to love myself as i keep hearing God loves me. I’m looking forward to the webcast!
I hear “you’ll never be as good as …” all the time about every subject. I can’t wait for tonight’s webcast.
The thing I always try to remind myself about negative chatter is that I wouldn’t talk to another person the way I sometimes talk to myself, which means it is not ok. I should treat myself as I would my family and friends – giving positive, encouraging words.
Inside Chatter never stops. Thoughts, good and bad. Sometimes biting, sometimes brilliant. Taking thoughts captive to Christ is a discipline practiced, albeit, too rarely to become reflexive. Lord, have mercy. Christ, have mercy!
I’m learning to discern the lies inside the negative chatter in my head. The lies sound so reasonable sometimes, I don’t even question them. It’s when I walk in them, and my husband or my friends call me on them–that’s when I go looking for the lie I’m believing. The Holy Spirit is faithful to lead me into all truth–His Truth–about who He says I am, and Who He is in me. Staying in God’s Word daily is my lifeline. I’ve also picked up my journal again to write down the conversations happening in my head. Sometimes, just seeing the lie written down next to the Scripture I’ve just read is enough to show the enemy’s baloney for what it is: baloney!!
Insider Chatter…I’ve been really working on filtering out that negative voice and listening for the words of the Lord to direct me. I’ve just come through 2 rather challenging weeks at work where not to long ago I would have reacted in an entirely different way; but because I took a step back and thought things through and prayed and listened for His words and His direction the situation has gone away and things are back to ‘normal’…..
Inside chatter holds you back from following the path God chose for you. If you listen to the negative voices of anyone, especially yourself, you will lose out on oppurtunities that God has placed before you and called you to do. Even if you feel the least worthy person to do these deeds God has asked of you, he will be your strength and he will make you have the confidence through him to complete his works. When you are left out and feel unworthy of other people’s love and friendship you have to remember that that tiny moment of not fitting in goes along with God’s plan for you. Everyone has lived a certain life, good or bad pasts, that were that way so that you would be able to use your story to help someone else struggling and guide them from the shadows of their doubt and back into the light.
I have had to learn to put a stop to the negative inside chatter… It’s still hard! Sill working on it.
I have learned that the internal chatter can be far worse than any external chatter I’ve heard…although it is probably a result of the external chatter in the first place. The only way I have found to calm/ cease/ destroy the negative inner chatter is to take it to Jesus and place it directly into His hands and then allow His words of truth to flood my heart and soul.
When the inside chatter tends to be loud, I try to pay attention to the small things that give me encouragement. A girlfriend calling out of the blue inviting me for walk. The sunshine on a warm winter day. A catchy faith song on the radio or one simple sentence in a great book I’m reading called Unglued. These are God’s whispers to me, which I hear above all the noise.
Yesterday I have a devotional at work about kindness. Afterward, my negative self chatter was telling me things like “You didn’t reach anyone,” “You could’ve done better,” and “Your voice was too shaky.”. Today, I started getting feedback. Some said they were touched by the message. Everyone said yet didn’t even notice that my voice was shaking. It really surprised me and made me take a moment to reflect on WHY I might be thinking negatively. I’m still not sure – but will be working on correcting it now that I am aware!
The “inside chatter” in my life began at a young age. Learned chatter coming from the people in my life I looked to – parents, teachers, family members. The negative got a hold of me and has greatly effected my self esteem and how I feel God sees me and how much He loves me. I have been learning through a mentor friend of mine that “pointing up” takes our minds off how we feel, if even for a moment, and focuses us “up” to Jesus. This has helped me tremendously in thinking about where my thoughts are and where they belong.
This is something that I am sure we all have dealt with time to time since we were teens but for me, it seems to have gotten a lot worst lately. I am 2 years into my marriage with the love of my life – who happened to have been married once before me and has a daughter (who is now 11 years old and is the sweetest and best child I could ask for). She lives with her mom but we have her most weekends and school holidays, etc. And, although I consider myself extremely blessed when it comes to stepfamilies these days, I have to admit, the inside (and oh so very negative) chatter can almost consume me at times. Thoughts of fear, doubt, insecurity – thoughts about my husbands first marriage…the list goes on. So, as someone who is in the midst of these negative thoughts, I am looking forward to this webcast. Thanks for putting this on. Can’t wait!
Oh and Unglued is great – I am about half way through it and it has already taught me so much.
I want to know HOW to make that negative inside chatter STOP!! I am so hard on myself. I need better coping mechanisms!
I am so very thankful for how God speaks to me at just the right time and how he knows my every hurt and need! This past weekend I have been feeling very hurt and left out. I am a grown women, wife and mother and even at this stage in my life, it still hurts just as much to know that I was not included in something that a group of friends was invited to. Reading this post has been such an encouragement and I am so thankful for God’s timing in leading me to find this blog.
Negative chatter has been the focus of my being for as long as I can remember. If it was wasn’t coming from those I surrounded myself with; an abusive, cheating husband, a demeaning boss, a bully I considered a friend. . .it was coming from myself. What I have learned is that I am my own worst enemy when it comes to feelings of self-worth. Even if someone tells me I have done a “good job” or I am a special part of his/her life; I have a hard time believing it. I had a dear friend and mentor, pastor, and therapist (one in the same person) say to me “I can tell you every time I talk to you what a special person you are, how much I value our friendship, and how worthy you are because you are a child of God, but until you start believing it, those are just words. His statement changed my life. It’s not easy. Nothing this important is. But when that negative chatter begins to invade my heart, mind and soul, I am reminded that nothing I perceive diminishes my value in Christ.
Reading the post today, made me think about all the times my group of friends would places and I was never invited or though of. Though somehow after doing Unglued OBS at Melissa Taylor’s page… I realized that it wasn’t that particular group of friends I should have realized but the fact that God placed them there for a season and a time. And now that has gone since my three years off from high school graduation. Till this day, I can say In Christ, I have found the greatest friend ever!
One of the biggest places of my inside chatter comes from my father. I never felt “good enough” for him. I’ve always felt that he might have liked me more, loved me more had a been born a boy. He even would say things to me like “that is god enough for a girl”. I was / am an over achiever of epic levels! And yet, there is still that voice saying good enough for a girl.
In a study at my church I learned that I am in fact a masterpiece of God’s creation. When I first read that in the study book… I laughed. ME?! Masterpiece!? But yeah…. me. A masterpiece.
Each day I get stronger in that belief.
I’ve been learning that prayer and praise to God takes the focus off of how (fill in the blank) I am and who God is and how he loves me anyway:) and the bible tells me what he thinks of me, truth.
I have to combat the chatter by reminding myself that I am a Daddy’s girl. When I spend time with God I call him Daddy. I love to sing the song what I was alone. Reminding me he is around and loves me and I love him. This helps me to feel special to him.
I have to combat the chatter by reminding myself that I am a Daddy’s girl. When I spend time with God I call him Daddy. I love to sing the song what I was alone. Reminding me he is around and loves me and I love him. This helps me to feel special to him.
I have had more than my share of inside chatter lately. I have just come out of the darkest inside chatter I ever want to be in. Isolation is the worst for inside chatter. The enemy uses your own thoughts against you.
We have all gone through things we didn’t think we would ever get through. But God is faithful especially when we don’t think He will be.I am looking forward to tonight. Thank you
Negative chatter seems to be louder since making the decision to stay home with my children. Feelings of disappointment are frequent. My expectations were set out of reach, and need to stop stressing and start enjoying the time with my little loves!
Negative chatter is the root of all gossip. I feel alot of this can be avoided if we would just talk to each other instead of about each other.
I just finished Unglued this morning and can’t stop raving about it. I struggle a lot with negative chatter and letting it ruin my entire day and I’m really learning and making an effort to change this.
Negative self-talk has been a huge issue for me. I used to believe whatever thought came into my mind, but I have learned to take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. It is still the first place that Satan attacks, but I now know how to reject his lies with God’s truth. I am thankful for godly people in my life to remind me when I “forget”.
All I can say is I’m now a mom of two youngsters, I should be all adult and over this right??? ha…I’m STILL learning how to combat negative chatter. Just today I was praying and asking Holy Spirit to lead me into all truth. To tell me how Jesus really sees me and how I should see Him. So grateful He is faithful to complete what He has started in me. My worship leader friend wrote a beautiful song during a really rough day with her kids and parenting and just life. It sums up where I am at right now. He sees me in all my brokenness and failures, knows me fully and fully loves me <3
You see me, you know me, you love me
You see me, you know me, you love me
You see me, you know me, you love me
I am Yours
In spite of my past and failures,
In spite of my wretchedness,
In spite of my selfish ambitions,
All of my brokeness
You see me, you know me, you love me
You see me, you know me, you love me
You see me, you know me, you love me
I am Yours
I am Yours, I'm Yours x3
Now and forevermore, I know I'm Yours
Nothing can separate me from Your grace
Nothing can separate me from Your peace
Nothing can separate me from Your love
Nothing can separate me from this truth…..
I am Yours, I'm Yours x3
Now and forevermore, I know I'm Yours
Now and forevermore, my heart is Yours
Now and forevermore, I know I'm Yours
Looking forward to the webcast tonight!
Why is it I expect so much more of myself than I do from others? I do not seem tobe able to quiet my inner critic. The story of the pink t shirts brought back many feelings of feeling excluded by others. I so enjou Lysas blogs. She normalizes the everyday lives of many of us.
This article reminds me, in those moments that hurt, upset anger me- they are but a speck in a WHOLE lifetime. It is so true, we are fulfilled in Christ, now the trick is keeping THAT at the forefront of our minds!
As a young girl I always was left out and felt I wasent good enough. I would also tell my young self that those small situation were just that small and didnt matter.
My inside chatter is so negative and needs to change! I need to change it with God’s help and support from my Christian friends 🙂
…made my really think about how my choices and decisions affect others…
What this reminded me of is that I am accepted in Christ. Completely accepted not because of anything I have or have not, will or will not do, but because of what Christ has done for me. I do not have to do anything to earn His acceptance. And I do not need to strive to receive acceptance of others. I am not 100% there. It is an ongoing battle to live this truth. But as I tell myself this truth, I am gradually getting better with God’s help.
The fantastic thing about this article is that I have a literal Bethany in my life. I have two children with my ex-husband and he had now “moved on” with a girlfriend (Bethany) and their new baby.
From time to time, I catch the negative inside chatter about many things and the fumbling of his relationships with women and myself. More the relationship that he has walked away from with His children. It’s a painful situation as many unfortunately know too well.
The two greatest lessons I have learned is self talk can make or break and our identity isn’t in whether we are left or kept, whether we are liked or ignored… Our identity in Christ is who we are and our relationship with Jesus is the one that matters most.
I’m so looking forward to the webcast. Inside chatter is something we seem to constantly deal with. You would think it would get left behind with our childhood but as long as we’re in this imperfect world with our vulnerable minds I guess we’ll be battling it. I get sucked into the game often and can become very discouraged but I’m also reminded often of my identity. I’m the daughter of the King. Nothing I can label myself can overwrite what he has labeled me. I am his prized possession… beautiful and pure. It can be hard to remember sometimes but I know, that I know, that I know it’s the truth. 🙂 We just have to grab hold of our own thoughts sometimes and get some perspective… God’s perspective. When I grab hold of that I feel His perfect peace and a perfect belonging. Lord help us all to not be discouraged and fooled and help us find you quickly when we feel the inside chatter trying to take over. Surround us with strong believing friends who will speak uplifting truth into our lives.
Can’t wait to learn about how to combat the inside chatter when it doesn’t line up to God’s Word.
When, by God’s grace and help, I have recognized my “inside chatter” for the negative thing that it is and then have spoken words of truth about who God is, I have been filled with JOY and have grown in my walk with Him. Yet, like many things in our lives, the ‘old man’ is ever working against us and I have gotten lax and have not been careful to combat the negative “inner chatter”. I’m looking forward to being encouraged to grow again in the Lord!
I’ve learned not to be so tough on myself, that there’s hope for me to learn/grow, and that the Lord is merciful!
I think Lisa is writing and talking about MY life. I am so excited to learn more!!
I recently found you and am so thankful! I too struggle with negative chatter all the time and believe my biggest problem is many times myself. Right now I’m struggling very much with work issues and feeling excluded. I am in a very negative situation & I am trying so hard not to let work define me while trying to uplift those around me. I ask God every day for strength and grace to meet the days challenges.
So excited to watch the Webcast! I’m reading one of your books now “Am I messing up my kids”, I love it!! Can’t wait to hear about all the inside chatter!
Negative chatter is something I deal with constantly. I am trying to learn how to conquer the negative chatter and really focus on the positives in my life. I am so thankful that you are discussing something all of us women deal with a lot and what we can do to push away the negative thoughts about ourselves! Thanks!
Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation. ——WOW I read this statement from your page to my sister and we were both speechless. How many times had we both wasted valuable energy on just this!!! I so can’t wait till 9pm arrives!!! I am sure it will be packed full of information we need to apply to our lives!! Thank You Lysa for doing this for us!!
Looking forward to the webcast! I like this “stuff” being labeled as “Inside Chatter!” Up to the point of reading about this I would have referred to self as having a brain that just won’t stop “thinking!” Not even in my sleep it would seem. I will be brave here and admit that alot of my “inside chatter” is to/at and with God! Not always in prayer form. Your “How To Be A Better Bible Study Girl” had a part that has stuck with several of us ladies in the church that had done this study together. “Everyone has a story!” My story has brought me to a place of continued inside chatter!
Looking forward to listening tonight!
Inside chatter can make u start to doubt yourself and you may start to believe you aren’t good enough or strong enough to accomplish God’s purpose for you. You need to turn your negative thoughts and everyone elses into determination to do the work God has called you for. You need to struggle and the troubles you have had led you to him so that you could share with others who need your help because they are living in darkness. You have to realize that thru God the shadows of your doubts vanish in the light and that you are the vessel that he wants to use to bring others to the light and out of the shadows of their own doubts.
16 minutes! I’m in my alone space so eager to hear the words that I know will be spoken specifically FOR just ME (plus every other participant)! I am hungry for the message soon to be received and have circled presenters and participants in Prayer. Shalom
For me, the inside chatter for so long was the one battle in my life that seemed to win a lot of the time. But then I began to really discover what the Lord said about me and who I was and suddenly, it didn’t seem to hurt so much if others left me out or if I was not part of certain things. I began to get more confident in myself and realize my inner worth, my beauty and my destiny. It was a really freeing experience to realize that the biggest battle I faced was within myself. Once I did, everything in my life changed and I devote my time now to helping others recognize their own inside chatter and how to recognize the lies. I am so excited to hear what else you have to share and I am so blessed that the Lord continually brings people into my path that are still helping me to see that my identity is in him and He says I am called, I am qualified and I am so worthy. See you tonight!!! YAY!!!!
Kristy <3
Inside chatter… the devils way of bringing us down…and with prayer and repeition knowing that the Devil has no hold on our power, we’ll surpass this test… 🙂
I am my worst enemy. I always think that I did something when something bad happens or something does not go the way I wanted to be.
As I begin my morning after my shower, the next ritual is to put on my make-up and fix my hair. This is where my mind chatter and self-sabotage sets in. Staring at myself in the mirror being critical and making up scenarios in my mind of all ‘the bad” things that could happen that day so I ca prepare myself for “what if”. After this 20 minute session of negative perceptions I have myself so worked up, I go off to work in a frenzie and negativity follows me the rest of the day. I hope to learn tonight how to change my thought patterns and lift myself up in the morning.
As I begin my morning after my shower, the next ritual is to put on my make-up and fix my hair. This is where my mind chatter and self-sabotage sets in. Staring at myself in the mirror being critical and making up scenarios in my mind of all ‘the bad” things that could happen that day so I ca prepare myself for “what if”. After this 20 minute session of negative perceptions I have myself so worked up, I go off to work in a frenzie and negativity follows me the rest of the day. I hope to learn tonight how to change my thought patterns and lift myself up in the morning.
I just discovered you today and am so excited to be part of the group! I can’t wait for the webcast tonight! My “inside chatter” usually leads to self pity and a downward spiral. So, I’ve discovered that when this happens if I start to pray for others I can stop the spiral. When my focus is off of Me then my inside chatter improves! It doesn’t always work for me but it does help to refocus.
I’m so glad to meet you, Lysa and I must say you are very beautiful. 🙂
I am so excited about the opportunity of this webcast and to be introduced to “Unglued”. This is coming at a time in my life when I need it to help me understand things from my early years, for my teenage daughter is experiencing them now and I really would like to be there and know the right things to say.
My daughter is where Lysa was all those years ago. That is why she will be with me during the live webcast.
I’ve learned that you MUST conquer negative thoughts with POSITIVE ones!
I read your blog and so appreciate your words of wisdom. There are days it’s the best news I have ever received. Thanks for the webcast tonight. So excited love WOF and have attended.
(Colossians 2: 9-10)!!! Thanks for this!!!
*I’ve had a entire committee in my head since i was a little girl! The committee never chatted about positive things, only negative. As an adult Ive learned that the committee consisted of everyone in my life that had ever picked on me or tore me down. These were the voices in my head! They were so loud I could hear anything else, not even God. Until….. I learned His word and that I could create a new committee, a committee of ONE! He is who I mostly hear now and if the old committee sneaks in I boldly tell them to be silent!! Praising God that the voices in my head are HIS!!
When dealing with the “inside chatter” I try to speak Biblical truth to the negativity. It tends to give me a better perspective and shows me what God thinks about me and helps me to focus on the truth and not what others may think about me.
I’ve had a lot of inside chatter in my life, more often than not it stems from wanting to belong to a particular group of church women…
I let myself get down thinking I am not good enough but the funny thing is that really it isn’t about me at all. Often times we are at a different place in our lives and we relate to others who are going through something similar. In my own selfishness and inside chatter moments, I failed to recognize that it isn’t always about me.
I learned that inside chatter can be a setback, inside chatter can cloud what God has for you and trying to bring you to purpose. Inside chatter can be that negative place where identity crisis and the battle in mind begin. I learned to cloud out inside chatter and be free and block out inside chatter. It is still learning process but all things are possible.
#Godisable #winner
I would love to win the bundle! :0) I love the study! :0)
I hear inside chatter all the time, I just never seem to ‘measure up’ to those around me and their expectations. This will be quite a new experience for me…..Women of Faith has already made me see me differently, and to understand Gods presence in my life.
Excited about the webcast tonight. I hope you do more.
oh man… reading this post, thinking, “that’s me!” I totally have insecurities of people not liking me, and I can go into such a downward spiral of how I’m this or that or not other things. It’s such a battle! praise and prayer helps, and gets the focus off me:)
The post reminds me of when I was in school and was always one of the last kids to be picked for the teams in gym class. As a teenager it is a very defining moment because you feel like your not good enough or people don’t like you.
I found the same way in college, because I was one of the few people in school that was a believer and frequently because of that I found that I was left out of certain activities with classmates.
I have found over the years that while it hurt then I realize that good friends can always be counted on to stick with you in all things and those friends are the ones that count.
I’ve learned that I’m not the topic of other people’s conversations NEARLY as much as my inner chatter would have me think. Lately I’ve been meditating on who God says I am and taking all other thoughts captive. What a blessing this has been for my confidence. And I can concentrate much better without all those negative voices!
As I begin my morning after my shower, the next ritual is to put on my make-up and fix my hair. This is where my mind chatter and self-sabotae sets in. Staring at myself in the mirror being critical and making up scenarios in my mind of all “the bad” things that could happen that day so I can prepare myself for “what if”. After this 20 minute session of negative perceptions, I have myself so worked up I go off to work in a frenzie and negativity follows me the rest of the day. II pray this web cast will offer suggestions and give me encouragement on how to lift myself up in the morning to have a positive attitude.
God knit each and every one of us and created us to be His. We often believe Satan’s lies so much faster than God’s truth. i have learned that the ultimate sacrifice Christ made for me shows me just how much I mean to him. Although this can be a harsh and heartbreaking world, our worth is in Him, not the world. When negative inside chatter threatens to take hold, God’s Word and prayer are our ultimate defense.
I have learned that when my Inside Chatter is following what the Word of God says is true verses how I feel I am much more loving to myself and those around me! God Bless!
Oh Wow, can not wait!!!
I can’t ever remember when inside chatter was not a part of my life. It is and has been a struggle for over 50 years. In my younger years I didn’t understand it or what it was or what it meant. It was just part of me. As I grew up those patterns still followed. As I grew in Christ I learned more about it and that I was not the only one. This past year at a women’s Bible study I was reminded again that I was not the only one. I find that when I am focused on the Lord and keep His word in my heart it pushes that negative chatter away. Memorizing scripture is a must to keep the chatter at bay. God and His word must have first place in my life to combat the chatter. For me it is a daily battle. Thankfully God’s word has the answers. I must put on my spiritual armour everday and fight the battle. But it is not me that has to fight , God will fight the battle for me as I yield to His Holy Spirit. I wish I could say everyday I am victorious, but I am not. But one day when I see Jesus, the battle for my mind will be over. What a relief that will be! But until then moment by moment I must yield to the Holy Spirit, memorize scripture, read His Word and pray , pray, pray! God is faithful and has promised to take me through everything he has planned for me. All things work together for good to those that love the Lord, and are called according to His purpose.
Well, I am so bummed…left my bible study early to catch Inside
Chatter and all I could get was an error..could not log in. I got in around 9:05est…is it going to be run again at some other time?
I learned that inside chatter can be a setback. Inside chatter can cloud the God free thoughts in your mind, It can be a setback to have the freedom to win the battle in the mind. I learned a few years back i can win the battle in the mind by a changed mind… so the inside chatter may come but i can overcome. It is a learning process but God is able.
#Godisable #winner
Lysa, Thank you Thank you Thank you- for being real! Your book spoke to me at a time in my life where I needed someone to understand me- when no one else would “get me.” You came when I needed a friend. Your real life experiences and words in your book- Unglued, where as if you were writing my life story, my unglued moments, my thoughts when I could not find words to express what I was thinking or going through. Thank you. Love the book, and ABSOLUTELY love the Unglued 60 day devotional! First paragraph of Day 1 in the devotional book, and I knew this is what I needed at just the right time. Thank you!
I’ve had a entire committee in my head since i was a little girl! The committee never chatted about positive things, only negative. As an adult Ive learned that the committee consisted of everyone in my life that had ever picked on me or tore me down. These were the voices in my head! They were so loud I couldnt hear anything else, not even God. Until….. I learned His word and that I could create a new committee, a committee of ONE! He is who I mostly hear now and if the old committee sneaks in I boldly tell them to be silent!! Praising God that the voices in my head are HIS!!
I left you an email. Didn’t know how to respond until now. I hear a lot of negative chatter. Telling me that I am not good enough, not worthy. I have never been good at counteracting Satan’s lies with truth. I have had a long battle with bulimia. The scripture that really speaks to my soul is Psalms 139:13-16. I know that I was created for more than to continue this battle. But I know that God is still in control. And I am working on turning that control over to Him.
I left you an email. Didn’t know how to respond until now. I hear a lot of negative chatter. Telling me that I am not good enough, not worthy. I have never been good at counteracting Satan’s lies with truth. I have had a long battle with bulimia. The scripture that really speaks to my soul is Psalms 139. I know that I was created for more than to continue this battle. But I know that God is still in control. And I am working on turning that control over to Him.
Would love to join in – need to hear about this inside chatter…
Would love to join in…& win this!
I’m so glad I got to see this webcast. Inside chatter is always going on in my head. Negative and positive. Being a women it is constant trying to be a good Christian wife, youth advisor and friend. Inside chatter keeps going and going. I need to learn to control it and become positive. Pray positive and hopefully the chatter will start to be quiet! Until then thank you for your positive website and helpful words!
Can’t wait!! Looking forward to the webcast!
I am also very bummed I was unable to connect to the webinar tonight. .tried for an hour! I’m finally giving up. Please let me know if this is offered again — I desperately need this!
She posted a link to the replay on her home page. I’m so glad b/c I couldn’t log in either.
I’ve learned that I need to discipline my thinking, in accordance to the word of God and praise him continuously in all I do.
Inside chatter is not from God….When I start thinking negative thoughts, I need to cast that down…. and ask myself why I wold think that! I love that they say to take 1 verse a day from the Bible…because I know I have struggled about how “read the bible”. This is great! I am a bummer sheep….running to my shepard!
I left a comment not sure what happened. Enjoying the webcast and learning how to make my inside chatter positive!!!
Inside chatter is the number 1 battle I think most of us face that we don’t even realize we are fighting. It is so easy to fall apart at the words within our own minds. Inside chatter was the #1 way that Satan kept me from understanding who I was. Once I came to understand that the inside chatter within my head were ALL lies, I experienced a freedom I never knew. ONce I came to understand that my identity was not in who I used to be but who I am in CHRIST, I realized that I truly was called, I truly was qualifed, and I truly was worthy. There was no more quitting…no more holding back and a fire within me was stirred that nothing can fully quench! Now instead of allowing my inside chatter to bring me down, I use it to motivate me even more to press forth because I know that it only comes when I am walking in the will of God. I now get to share my story with others and teach them about the lies that destroy us silently. Thank you for your message and being a reminder that my identity comes from Him and nothing else!!!
Kristy <3
I’m loving this webcast! My inner chatter is so confusing! I am so blessed to be hearing the 3 of you tonight. I know that God is using the 3 of you in my life.
Lysa had me in tears because I could relate to everything she said about hanging our identity on the fickle opinions of others, fragile choices of our children and faulty comparisons of our insides to the shiny outsides of others. Lysa speaks the truth in such a way that really speaks to me. I am going to start my day tomorrow with one verse so that I can combat that chatter. I have been wanting to begin memorizing verses and this would help me so much in my every day for the sole purpose of remembering who I am in Christ. I want to stop swerving!!! Also, Sheila’s story was so compelling, so moving. This webcast had such perfect timing for me. Thank you Lysa & Sheila!!!! ♥
What have I learned about inside chatter? It can be destructive, it can be ruthless, it can be hard-hearted. Inside chatter makes my teeth hurt, literally. I have struggled with it my entire 39 and1/2 years. I long to be free in Christ Jesus of it forever. He already paid the price, except I keep thinking I have to pay a ticket.
Awareness of owning too much of what I don’t even know to be true is yucky but truly a blessing..
I will be tuning in. I want to learn how to not listen to the inside chatter.
Thank you for the post! I haven’t read in awhile and really needed it. This is always me…. As a young child, as a teen and even as an adult being excluded of feeling excluded. I’m thankful I’m fulfilled by God not people
I’ve struggled with negative self-talk my entire life. It’s only when I am active in my church, around Christian friends, and daily studying my bible that I am more able to fend off those condemning thoughts. If I stray from the things I know I should be doing, I tend to believe the enemy when he tells me I’m worthless. Love my God!
Well, I thank you for givin us the opportunity to watch this free on line, unfortunately I missed it because all I got was the page and all the info and asking you how to subscribe for remainders of webcasts, and I though I was on time after spending 15 minutes then I see that it said in one of the pages we hope you had a good time watching, And I am like “What?” “what do you mean? if it is only 9:10pm and I live in San Francisco>” So, I was very dissappointed. I hope next time I can watch it. God bless you.
I’ve been learning lately that my inside negative chatter has been dictating my moods. So, I’ve been trying to erase the negative thoughts and replace then with truth. Its really been helping my moods improve!
Could not open, hope to see today
I have learned that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
He knows my situation and is in all of them.
I’m thankful I stumbled across your blog! It’s been a blessing… speaks to me and reminds me of who I am in Christ.
I noticed on twitter last night that some people could not connect. I got on, but soon had trouble and tried to refresh. I had to refresh 2 times and it froze, so I missed it!
I’m glad I can give it another try.
I am new to this website and to Lysa’s books, teachings etc. Not sure how I stumbled across the website but here I am, so I am sure it was Gods plan 🙂 Although people tell me they see me as a very confident , outgoing person, – I have always struggled with negative inside chatter, to the point of some anxiety, … it would sometimes keep me from social events, or from befriending those that I felt like I might not measure up to. I am always afraid that when others really get to know me, I won’t be “enough” . I am in my late 40’s, and I have always felt this way. Now, I find myself worrying about my son and how others perceive him, and if they will think he is enough, etc. This webcast made me realize that others feel those same feelings :/ but more importantly , it made me realize that I am “enough”! What a reminder that God knows exactly who I am and he still loves me, flaws and all 🙂 I am adopting the daily repetitive verse idea and will be praying for all of you who experience negative chatter. Thanks for the webcast!
I am so glad that I found this website. It is helping me become a better mom and wife day by day.
Thank you for your faithfulness to God.
I only know that “inside chatter” can and will hinder God from doing in us what He wants. This is something I definitely struggle with.
Dear Ms. Lysa,
I wanted to take a minute to tell you THANK YOU for writing Unglued and to share an experience tha had this week.
During the recent Christmas Holidays I had a complete meltdown with my family (i was really unglued!)… I think it was: the holidays, a retired husband who drives me totally nuts, over-spending on gifts we didn’t need, disappointment with extended family and much more, it all piled up and I just lost it over the dumbest thing. It was not pretty at all!
Thankfully I have a wonderful daughter who puts everything in God’s hands (and I’m sorry to say I did not teach this to her – she is teaching me). One of her friends suggested your book and my daughter purchased it for me.
I am slowly reading it. I am still a work in progress as I try to remember your words when things happen. I wrote a prayer from the devotional guide (Proverbs 3:5-6) and I read it many times every day. I had an experience yesterday I wanted to share with you.
One of my Christmas presents from my husband was a Kindle Fire (which I really did not need). Last Sunday evening I left it on the end table in the family room. While I was at work the next day, and my husband was out running errands, our lovable dog decided she wanted to learn to read and she chewed up the protective cover and cracked the screen, so it is totally ruined.
(Side note: I also have a Nook Reader this dog got her teeth on a few years ago and luckily she only damaged the cover for the Nook. I do know better – do NOT leave anything on this particular end table because.. a hair clip, paperback book, candy or whatever, she will chew it up if she is left alone).
I am thanking becasue I did not freak out, yell, scream, cry or come ungluded. I just sat on the couch and prayed that I would not freak out, yell, scream, or cry. And I realized that it is done and over adn I can’t change it, I can only change myself. The dog didn’t mean to destroy my expensive toy, she was just bored.
Your book is speeking to me on every page and came to me at a time when I needed to understand why I get unglued and to bring me closer to God.
I Love the book, and ABSOLUTELY love the Unglued 60 day devotional! First paragraph of Day 1 in the devotional book, and I knew this is what I needed at just the right time. Thank you again!
Toni
Sorry for the typos!! UGH
I have been battling mean old inside chatter for life!
And it has caused me to make some poor choices over the years.
I let the inside chatter spew out and its effects touch my family.
To the point that it cost me my relationship with my middle child.
She has alienated me from her life and is hurting badly herself.
This loss caused even more chatter until just this year I faced my demons and realized if God can forgive me who am I to hold a grudge against myself!
I so encourage women to squelch the inside chatter.
Start believing what God has to say about you ASAP!
Before you have to live with the consequences that could affect the rest of your life.
Set your self free to be who God knows you are! And live it! Thank you Lysa for sharing your wisdom. God bless you.
I recently found Ann Voskamp which, actually today while on her website and listening to the music, found you. Getting ready to listen to the January 29th Sitting at Home Alone – and going to sign up to listen to other events. It is so amazing how the Lord, if one sits quietly and listens, leads you to where you need to be.
Thanks Lysa! The reminder of how to find our fullness in Christ is effective for me. You see I often feel alone because my husband is active duty military living hundreds of miles away and just about all my girlfriends have husbands that I wouldn’t dare take them away from…and I shouldn’t have to. In Christ I am NOT ALONE, and I find fullness in his presence and love. I reminded of that in your sharing of scripture and when I bow my head crying out for my heavenly father to hold me. I cannot find my fullfillment or acceptance in friends or even my husband…that love and acceptance only comes through my personal relationship with Jesus Christ.
Dear Lysa,
I have heard so many wonderful things about Unglued. I hope to someday read it. My life is a merry-go-round with a disabled husband, responsibilities at a full-time job, being a caregiver and trying to take care of myself as much as possible. Your daily readings and blogs are so special to me. They lift me up and help me look at the world in a different light. It pulls me through each day as I struggle with sadness and delightfulness being in the light of God. My spirituality has helped me get through each day for the last nine years and your daily blogs and devotions send me into a never ending day of bliss. Thank you for helping me find my fullness in Christ!
Blessing,
Toni
Hi Lysa, You’re a Godsent! Thanks for your website it is truely upliftinging (which we could all use more of!) . Anyway, recently had sugery for my parthyrorid, and half my thyroid remoived due to high levels of calcuim. The group MOPS (Mothers Of Preschoolers had been helpful deliveiving meals to my home; Also my chuch the following week provided meals also. I”m just so gratful and thankful for all the prayers and help we recievied. Aside, from that I would truly like to just rest and have peac alone for a time (since I lead a very active life with a 4yr., and a 7yr.alone with my dear husband that we have been married for 9 years. I’m also in the Sunshine Club (where I sent or call a person when they are sick, or had a baby, etc,)Anyway alittle down time alone (with the Lord) or just in my thoughts would be deligithful! Take Care, and Live One Day at A Time BY GoD’S Grace’s. Tammy
Thank you for this article. My marriage has been struggling lately and before I started reading this I was having conversations in my head about all the things going on instead of turning those thoughts into a cry to Jesus.
Inside chatter can determine your outlook on life. You can be positive or negative with what you tell yourself. It can determine your countenance. It can change relationships, perspectives, and how you react to everything around you. It’s important to align your inside chatter with what the bible says and how God see’s you, not how the world see’s you.