Lysa TerKeurst | Leading Women in the Adventure of Faith

7.15.2019

But I’m Nothing Like the Proverbs 31 Woman …

“Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.” Proverbs 31:30 (ESV)

Do you ever get that sinking feeling of not quite measuring up at the mention of the Proverbs 31 woman? Me too. I remember when I first read this chapter many years ago as a young wife and mom. I thought the Proverbs 31 woman was overwhelmingly perfect.

And as I’ve walked through a season of extreme hardship in my marriage over the last few years, I’ve found myself not just intimidated by Proverbs 31 but defeated by this wife whose marriage seems full of praises. Even good marriages don’t always have such shiny realities.

That’s why my heart feels especially tender toward those who would rather skip over Proverbs chapter 31. I know what it’s like to have these words sit heavy on your heart with a resounding declaration of “not enough.”

But what if I told you that the heart behind Proverbs 31:10-31 is one of celebration, not condemnation?

The first thing I want us to take note of is that this isn’t just a chapter about a wife of noble character, despite how your Bible titles verses 10-31. It’s a chapter about a woman of valor. A courageous woman. A woman of strength and dignity.

In Jewish culture, these verses are read out loud on the Sabbath as a celebration over the women. This is in no way condemning what they aren’t but celebrating how they are, in their own unique expressions, living out the virtues detailed in this chapter. These aren’t words meant to tell a woman she is supposed to be more. They are a celebration of who she is.

Isn’t that the way it should be?

Courageous women celebrating each other … and those they love celebrating them? All under the banner of honoring God, serving out of love, and smiling at the future. Yes, this is why I love Proverbs 31 and rejoice that our ministry is named after such uplifting Scriptures.

I also love how Proverbs 31:30 reminds us of what’s truly worth celebrating: “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

Notice it’s not a woman with a spotless house who is to be praised. It’s not the mom with perfectly behaved children wearing matching, designer outfits. Honestly, it’s not even the woman who’s married and has children.

A woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. This isn’t an “I’m afraid of God” kind of fear. This type of fear refers to having a heart completely in awe of God. It describes a woman who honors God by seeking Him in everything she does and trusting Him wholeheartedly with her life. She has a heart of reverence that overflows into a life of spiritual maturity and wisdom.

And let’s not forget to look at today’s verses within the context of why God gave us this book of the Bible. The very first chapter of Proverbs tells us it exists so we can gain wisdom, instruction, understanding, insight, knowledge, discretion and guidance (as seen in Proverbs 1:1-7). Proverbs 2:1-5 goes on to remind us that as we receive and apply God’s commands, we’ll be able to understand how to find the knowledge of the Lord.

Wisdom is both a gift from God and a process of learning. And Proverbs 2:10 tells us the benefit of this kind of wisdom: It will be pleasant to your soul as it enters your heart.

I know this is a passage of Scripture that can easily trip us up. But what if we take God at His Word and choose to believe these words hold good and pleasant things for us? What if we challenge ourselves to look at Proverbs 31 closely — to see which part of it is a gift to us and which verses we need to learn from? What if we speak these words over ourselves and the other women in our lives as a form of celebration instead of condemnation?

God tucked these words into His Word for all eternity, sweet friends. And that tells me they are needed and meant for our good. Let’s ask Him to help us learn from them today.

Father God, thank You for this beautiful picture You painted in the pages of Scripture. Help me receive these words from You as a gift. Help me hear them spoken over my own life with Your voice of love. And show me how to live them out, according to the unique way You purposefully designed me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

7.1.2019

Pressing Through the Pain

“Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.” James 4:8a (NKJV)

Does it ever feel like the heartbreak in your life is trying to break you?

I understand. I’ve been in that place where the pain of heartbreak hits with such sudden and sharp force that it feels like it cuts through skin and bone. It’s the kind of pain that leaves us wondering if we’ll ever be able to function like a normal person again.

But God has been tenderly reminding me that pain itself is not the enemy. Pain is the indicator that brokenness exists.

Pain is the reminder that the real enemy is trying to take us out and bring us down by keeping us stuck in broken places. Pain is the gift that motivates us to fight with brave tenacity and fierce determination, knowing there’s healing on the other side.

And in the in-between? In that desperate place where we aren’t quite on the other side of it all yet, and our heart still feels quite raw?

Pain is the invitation for God to move in and replace our faltering strength with His. I’m not writing that to throw out spiritual platitudes that sound good; I write it from the depth of a heart that knows it’s the only way.

We must invite God into our pain to help us survive the desperate in-between.

The only other choice is to run from the pain by using some method of numbing. But numbing the pain — with food, achievements, drugs, alcohol or sex — never goes to the source of the real issue to make us healthier. It only silences our screaming need for help.

We think we are freeing ourselves from the pain when, in reality, what numbs us imprisons us. If we avoid the hurt, the hurt creates a void in us. It slowly kills the potential for our hearts to fully feel, fully connect, fully love again. It even steals the best in our relationship with God.

Pain is the sensation that indicates a transformation is needed. There is a weakness where new strength needs to enter in. And we must choose to pursue long-term strength rather than temporary relief.

So how do we get this new strength? How do we stop ourselves from chasing what will numb us when the deepest parts of us scream for some relief? How do we stop the piercing pain of this minute, this hour?

We invite God’s closeness.

For me, this means praying. No matter how vast our pit, prayer is big enough to fill us with the realization of His presence like nothing else.

Our key verse (James 4:8a) reminds us that when we draw near to God, He will draw near to us. When we invite Him close, He always accepts our invitation.

And on the days when my heart feels hurt and my words feel quite flat, I let Scripture guide my prayers — recording His Word in my journal, and then adding my own personal thoughts.

One of my personal favorites to turn to is Psalm 91. I would love to share this verse with you today, as an example for when you prayerfully invite God into your own pain.

Verse: “Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.” (Psalm 91:1, NIV)

Prayer: Lord, draw me close.

Your Word promises when I draw close to You, You are there. I want my drawing close to be a permanent dwelling place.

I am not alone, because You are with me. I am not weak, because Your strength is infused in me. I am not empty, because I’m drinking daily from Your fullness. You are my dwelling place. And in You I have shelter from every stormy circumstance and harsh reality. I’m not pretending the hard things don’t exist, but I am rejoicing in the fact that Your covering protects me and prevents those hard things from affecting me like they used to.

You, the Most High, have the final say over me. You know me and love me intimately. And today I declare that I will trust You in the midst of my pain. You are my everyday dwelling place, my saving grace.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

And with that I close my prayer journal, feeling a lot less desperate and a lot more whole. I breathe the atmosphere of life His words bring.

I picture Him standing at the door of my future, knocking. If I will let Him enter into the darkness of my hurt today, He will open wide the door to a much brighter tomorrow.

Learn how to steady your soul through prayer and overcome feelings of helplessness by inviting God into your situation with my Steady Your Soul: A 21-day Prayer and Journal Experience.

It’s our gift to you when you donate to Proverbs 31 Ministries HERE.

6.10.2019

Sometimes It’s a One- or Two-Verse Day

“Pay attention to what I say; turn your ear to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to one’s whole body.” Proverbs 4:20b-22 (NIV)

Do you ever get overwhelmed when you sit down to read your Bible? There are so many books, deep thoughts, spiritual insights and life-altering truths — where do we begin for today?

My sticky farm table and I have a long history of early mornings together. I gather up my Bible and my computer. I push past the sleepy feelings begging me to go back to my bed. And I look at the well-worn book as my love letter from God.

Truly, His words are a lifeline to me. A whisper from my God. A personal note. A treasure.

Of course, I don’t always find myself in a season where I can consume chapters at a time. Some days, quite honestly, it’s just one or two verses that I tuck into my heart, so I can live out our key verses: “Pay attention to what I say; turn your ear to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to one’s whole body” (Proverbs 4:20b-22).

This is what I want to do. I want to really pay attention. I need to listen well to what God is saying. I look for one verse I can savor word by word, letting it sink in deeply — interrupting me, rearranging me, redirecting me.

And I pray …

“Dear God, what plans have I made for today that this verse needs to interrupt?

“God, what thoughts did I bring in from yesterday that this verse needs to rearrange?

“And God, what heart attitudes have I been carrying that this verse needs to redirect?”

His Word is the protective covering over my plans, my mind and my heart. To let me run free without it will surely find me tripping over my own selfishness, insecurities and weaknesses. So, with His love letter, He reminds me to pause, pause, pause.

Pause and let the Holy Spirit intervene in my natural flesh response.

Pause so I don’t make the conversations all about me.

Pause and remember: I’m not always right.

Pause to see the blessings, so many blessings, and say “thank you” at least once an hour.

Pause to serve, pause to give, pause to encourage when everyone else rushes by.

The book of Proverbs has even more to say on how taking the time to cherish God’s Word can lead to us being changed by His Word. For example …

“My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding — indeed, if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding … Then you will understand what is right and just and fair — every good path” (Proverbs 2:1-3, 9, NIV).

“Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you. The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. Cherish her, and she will exalt you; embrace her, and she will honor you” (Proverbs 4:6-8, NIV).

We don’t have to get overwhelmed with the enormity and depth of the Bible.

It’s okay if we read just a verse or two today.

But more importantly than reading His words, we must choose to receive them. And even more importantly, we must live them. Because the more we apply God’s teaching to our lives, the more it becomes part of us.

God’s Word to me. God’s Word in me. God’s Word working through me. God’s Word lived out by me. Let this be the rhythm of Truth in my life.

Dear Lord, help me to see You today in a single word or a single verse. You are all-powerful, and anything is possible through You. May Your words and Your truth seep into the plans I make and every thought I think today. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.