They were laughing in their matching neon pink t-shirts with the words “Bethany’s Birthday Girls” printed on the front. They were going bowling after school. Then to get pizza. Then a sleep over.
When Bethany passed out the shirts by her locker that morning I pretended to be too busy to notice. I stayed hyper focused on unpacking my book bag into my locker. And then I hurried off to my first class.
It was clear. Bethany had made a list of her friends and I hadn’t been included.
I thought I would be. We’d gotten together before. I’d invited her to my pool party.
No big deal, I tried to tell myself all day. I had plans that night too.
To sit at home. Alone. And wonder why I hadn’t been chosen.
It’s been years since I watched those neon pink shirts all pile into a station wagon after school and drive away.
But it hasn’t been years since I’ve heard the negative inside chatter that ensued afterwards.
“You’re not liked.”
“You weren’t invited.”
“You weren’t chosen.”
Here’s what I wish I could have told my little sans pink t-shirt self back then…And what I need to remember when those same feelings creep in today…
Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.
Not getting a pink t-shirt that day felt like a defining moment. And maybe it was for that day. I wasn’t invited to Bethany’s party. And that stunk.
But it wasn’t a defining moment of my identity.
It was a moment. And moments shift. People are fickle. People shift.
In the moment Bethany made the list of who to invite to her party, I wasn’t on the top of her mind. Not because she didn’t like me, but simply because she hadn’t thought about it.
It was a small situation.
And I can’t put the whole of my identity into the smallness of this situation. Or any other for that matter.
My Pastor used a verse in his sermon this week that echoes these same thoughts, “For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, AND YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST,” (Colossians 2: 9-10).
I have been given fullness.
I can place the wholeness of my identity in that reality… and see everything else as small in comparison.
I want to invite you to join Women of Faith’s Sheila Walsh and me tomorrow, January 29th, at 9:00 p.m. EST for a FREE webcast on how to combat negative inside chatter.
You can sign up to receive a reminder about the webcast by clicking here. We would love to have you with us!
And there are prizes!!! We’ll be giving away 2 adorable, tiffany blue Women of Faith bags packed full of all kinds of goodies during the webcast.
- a copy of Unglued
- a copy of the Unglued Devotional
- God Loves Broken People by Sheila Walsh
- Stumble Into Grace by Lisa Harper
- What Women Fear by Angie Smith
- Pink Women of Faith T-Shirt
- Necklace and bracelet
- Women of Faith bag
All you have to do to enter is leave a comment on this post stating what you’ve learned about “Inside Chatter” in your life! We’ll be discussing your insights and announcing the winner tomorrow night on the webcast, so go on and get to commenting
For this party, everyone is invited!