I was tired, teary and hungry. That’s such a bad combination when you actually still want to be nice to people, especially those who call you Mommy.
I had such good intentions to stay calm that morning despite getting very little sleep the night before.
I’d been helping with an important school fundraiser project, but at that moment I was wondering why I agreed to do so much. Being in charge of a large part of the event sounded fun when I’d signed up. But the fun quickly turned to stress. I’d underestimated how much time it would realistically take. Plus I’d completely overestimated my capacity to have the necessary energy to carry this to completion.
Then two other volunteers backed out and there I was, once again, frantic and frazzled.
Chaos nipped at the edges of my frayed nerves.
Somewhere between the lost permission slip that had to be signed, the misplaced library book due the week before, and the only bread available for sandwiches having mold on it, calm eluded me.
I pinched off the edges of the bread and toasted it. Surely that would fix it, right?
Then my youngest marched into the kitchen announcing it was chapel day at school and she needed a Bible. I instructed her to go get the pink one Grandma had given her.
“I lost that last month and my teacher keeps telling me to remind you to get me a Bible. I have to bring one today no exceptions or excuses,” she said in a tone I was afraid mimicked the way her teacher said it to her. Clearly, I was greatly impressing this teacher.
And clearly, this was yet another demonstration that I was failing as a mom. Her Bible had been lost for a month and I didn’t have a clue. Awesome.
“Take mine from my nightstand. Just make sure you bring it back home today,” I quipped, thankful to have a solution.
A few minutes later Bible girl came back, “I can’t find yours either. It’s not on your nightstand.”
Quickly my brain darted this way and that way through all the possible reasons why my Bible wouldn’t be on my nightstand. After tracing my steps and thinking through the last place I remembered having it, I realized I must have left it at church … four days earlier.
Awesome. And yet another glaring reminder of my shortcomings.
I wrote a note to the teacher explaining we were apparently having Bible-location issues in our family and that I would absolutely make sure my daughter had a Bible for next week’s chapel. Nothing humbles this Bible teacher quite like having to write a note like that.
Then I loaded up the kids in the van as the clock glared its reminder I would be late getting them to school again.
I imagine you might relate to this scenario even if the details are different.
I’m learning how important it is to be more realistic with assessing both how much time something is going to take and my capacity to fulfill that task. Knowing that I tend to underestimate time and overestimate my capacity, I must build in a buffer.
I’ve decided my time buffer should be 15 minutes. If I think something is going to take me an hour, I schedule one hour and 15 minutes. Anytime I make an exception to this, I regret it. And then if it takes me less time, I’m always grateful for the 15 minutes of breathing room.
Imagine how much more calm we’d all be with little spaces of breathing room tucked throughout our day!
Psalm 39:6-7 reminds us, “We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing. We heap up wealth, not knowing who will spend it. And so, Lord, where do I put my hope? My only hope is in you.” (NLT)
All this rushing will end in nothing. That’s a sobering thought to a girl like me. A girl who is learning to be more honest about her time and her capacity. Why is it that the hardest person to be honest with sometimes is ourselves?
So today, let’s commit to unrush.
To better use the two most powerful words, yes and no.
And to place our hope in the Lord’s hands as we seek the Best Yes answers for our lives.
If you feel like you’ve set your life to the rhythm of rush and wish things could be different, my book The Best Yes can help. Get your copy here.
Today I’m giving away 5 copies of The Best Yes. To be entered to win, comment below with one way you’re going to tuck a little extra breathing room into your life this week.
I will say yes to God first and go to church. Then I haven’t my counseling and my S.O.A.R. class that I’m going to. I also will pick up my granddaughter and bring her to preschool then pick her up. Then I will spend time with her and let her write and draw with colored chalk on cement. That’s my yes’ for sure this week.
I give myself that time but my daughter pushes her sleeping time to the LIMI. I always tell her we have to leave Earlier then we do so she is ready early
I am going to add that 15 minute bumper into my time schedule. I know how long it should take me to get myself and 3 youngs kids ready in the morning, so I wait to the very last possible minute to get everyone ready. However, nine times out of ten I am stressing like crazy because we are running late.
I think adding 15minutes is an excellent idea and one i will be trying for myself. One of the things i decided to try was getting up 30 minutes earlier and sitting in the quiet for a 1/2 hour just to plan my day, its amazing to me how the Lord directs my mind when i do this and helps me. I am reminded of the little things that will add time onto my busy schedule that i never think about in the rush of the day. He is so amazing!
I will schedule a time slot to answer emails and phone calls, and not do the task throughout the day! Loving your idea of a “15 minute buffer time”, I will also add that to my week. Thank you Lisa, this was much needed this morning! God bless.
Use my hourglass and actually watch the sand filter through a few times during the day to refocus, refresh and rejuvenate and concentrate on a scripture Psalm 46:10 Be still,…..
I plan to take your suggestion of adding 15 minute buffer time. Great idea!
I really like the buffer idea and will begin using it. This is an answer to prayer. God Bless! Eric
I totally LOVE your idea of adding 15 min of buffer. Somehow I always seem to be 15 min late for everything, so hopefully this will help :). I also plan to add a 30 minute cuddle break with my daughter when she comes home from school!
Oh how I need to do this!
I am going to say no to extra commitments that I can not fit into my schedule right now.
I scheduled some vacation time next week and didn’t tell anyone in my family. (but they did find out when they went to look at my work calendar….)
I love your idea of adding a 15 minute buffer to my estimated time to complete a task. I’m going to try that as well as put EVERYTHING on my iPad calendar so I don’t over book myself. Thanks for being so real & transparent Lysa. So blessed by you!
This is a great message. I think I am going to do the same as you did an extra 15 minutes. That could be the difference of chaos in my heart or peace. I rarely hear God in the chaos but where their is peace I can hear more clearly!!
I will use the word no more often!
The fifteen minute buffer is a great idea for sure. Naturally from growing up my dad always had his clocks set ten minutes fast for work so he wouldn’t run late. Used to drive me crazy as a kid but now I realize why he did it that way. With my own kids and when I was working full time things come up. Lost shoes, cloths not clean, no water for showers, or car issues. It has helped me greatly and I am always trying to improve upon have extra breathing room.
I’m getting up earlier and yes it’s killing me!
This article is just perfect fore to read after the week I have had. When I take time in the mornings to gather my thoughts for the day and take time for a devotion, my day tends to be a better day.
I love your idea of the 15 minute buffer so I plan on using that along with prayer!! Lots of prayer!!!!
God bless you, Lysa! Your stories hit so close to my heart. Raising five kids it’s not for the weak and I’m right there doing it as well. Chronically rushing and trying to holding onto God along the way is hard- It would be much easier to hold on at a “slower pace”. Thank you for your insight and inspiration!!
We just moved 2 hours south of our town we had lived in for 11 years. We still don’t have a routine down. And bedtime has gone from 8:30-10:00! I get up at 4:30 for work! Our washer broke! We are going to a laundry mat. Haven’t had time to get a new one. The ball joint on the car is bad. It shakes when u drive! Last night I brought my daughter to softball practice at 5. Went back to get her @ 6 cause we needed to go to tae kwon do and there was no practice. I looked at the schedule it was from 6:30-8! We r just running in circles right now. Unsure of how to find that non rushing day? Hasn’t happened since we moved 3 weeks ago!
Thanks for listening sister loved by God!
Christine
I love the idea of 15 minutes of “free” time. I know that our Lord would love for me to be at peace, stop the chaos and spend that time with Him. It would be good for my soul. I will try to set aside 15 minutes at lunch time or mid day to refuel myself and breathe, spend time in prayer. I’m looking forward to that today. Thanks!
I’m going to exercise everyday, if only a mile… I’m going to make time to be kind to myself, and say yes to quality over quantity. This includes food, and how I spend my time.
To add more time and margin to my life, I will say yes or no in the appropriate settings. I will continue to give myself extra time for travel, projects, etc.
This picture truly describes my life when my children were growing up. Now that they are grown, I still have trouble wrapping my head around what God wants me to do with my abilities and time. I fret too much and pray for wisdom to make better choices too little. I have your book, along with about ten other books I have been given or strongly suggested to read. Yours hasn’t made it back to the surface. Today, I’ll bring it to the top again. Every article from this book speaks to me. Thank you for the work you do to share these bits of sensibility from God’s word.
Mary
Spend an extra thirty minutes with God in His Word, Praying, seeking His face, giving my problems and concerns to Him, take a deep breath and just relax. Trust Him, let the words of Philippines 4:6-7 sink deep within my soul.
Give my first five minutes of my day to Jesus!
Amen! Underestimating the time it will take me to accomplish something seems like a sickness I’ve struggled with my whole life. I wonder if 15 minutes would cover me, I’m thinking more like double my estimate!
Late to work, late to school, late to church, and always rushing. I know God does not smile upon my stress in the midst of rushing and I see myself and family members suffer. Thank you for bringing this to light this morning. I will prayerfully apply it to my days ahead.
I would LOVE this book. …it is my life. Thank you lysa for all you so and ALWAYS encouraging me!
Added fifteen minutes to my daily activities sounds great. I will start by waking up fifteen minutes earlier. If I don’t use it great more time to focus and pray.
Thanks for identifying with me, a mother of 4. However, they are all grown. Wouldn’t you think I would have the stress under control? Not only are my children grown, but I’m retired. Still, I take on much, don’t always plan ahead and become stressed. I’m learning to let Prayer time has become my answer. Next, I’m going to learn to do a Daniel fast and discipline myself to walk. I’ve seen amazing answers to prayer, but if want to get as close to God as I possibly can!
Ann
In an effort to become less un-rushed, I commit to the understanding that even though I can plot and plan out my days with all that I want (and need) to accomplish, it is God who is control, It is God who knows which direction I am going because he created my map and knows the true direction and purpose of my life. I commit to finding peace and comfort in knowing He knows better.
This week I’m going to get up 30 minutes earlier to decrease rush in morning chaos and commute.
Thank you so much for your post Lysa. I suffer with chronic fatigue and I am constantly overestimating what I can do. I believe that if I spend more time listening to God it will help me, and I will also break my diploma work into manageable sections and allow myself extra time to complete instead of deciding on an hour, making no progress and punishing myself afterwards! Thank you for opening my eyes to what God and a bit of extra time can do!! Xxx
I started a new job and a new bible study at the beginning of the year. I have made it a priority to get up and devote 30 minutes to the study. The new job is a 30 minute further drive from my former job, so I am actually getting up an hour earlier than before. My biggest struggle is saying “no” to requests from my former job! I would love the book to gain some insights on how to say yes or no and not “beat myself up” with the choice that I made!
Just for *today* I will “just say no”…I’m a master list maker and master list failure!! SO, breathe in, breathe out and “let go and let God”
I will use your “add 15 minutes” technique! I am a chronically late person 🙂 thanks Lysa!
I will give myself 15 extra minutes in the morning to get ready, relax, and enjoy devotion time without just fitting it in.
I’m driving 35 mi each day I take my grandson to school (2x/day). I will allow an extra 15″ each time to allow for possible traffic tie-ups. If I arrive early, I’ll be able to read my devotional as I “wait” for him!
I completely needed to hear this right now in life. I’m going to have to learn to take things to the Lord and say no more often. And I am definitely going to use your 15 minute add-on for time…however, I feel so unorganized lately and short on time that I may just have to make it 30!!
Thank you, Lysa, for sharing your heart today. I wanted to take a moment to share mine with you, and to help you understand how God used you to help me today.
Yesterday was a day that left me feeling overwhelmed by our life circumstances. Often, I create a “to-do” list in my mind of everything I want to accomplish during the day. And, while this can be helpful to motivate me, it has recently been stressful on me. When I end the day, and I’ve not accomplished what I thought I would (housework, laundry, dishes, promises to play outside with the kids or make a good home cooked meal after a long day of work); I’m left feeling overwhelmed. Social media makes it worse; it’s a blackhole that consumes my time as I scroll through images of my friends and family who seem to have everything together; pictures of the perfect playdate, the perfect dinner, the thoughtful flowers from someone’s husband at work. And, in a time where I should be enjoying my time connecting with others, I find myself comparing with others and becoming more overwhelmed. In the midst of it all, I stay on social media much longer than I ever intended, making myself rush around in the morning to go to work or rush around to get frozen chicken nuggets in the oven before my husband gets home and rarely having a moment to spend reading my Bible or sitting with my children at the beginning of the day. So, here is my commitment this week; to help me better manage my time; I’m going to spend time with God first. If I spent as much time with him preparing my heart as I do with comparing my heart to others every morning, instead of being overwhelmed, I would be overflowing with His peace, strength, mercy, and grace to guide me through my day, whatever changes come my way.
I went to work full time outside the home (temporarily!) and while I have many of those overwhelmed days usually, words cannot describe how I’ve felt these last weeks. Today is my last day and I will remember and pray for all the moms out there who have that plate to spin along with everything else. The 15 minute idea is great for all of us. Thanks!
To get a little extra breathing room, I am going to try (really, really try) to reach out to others when I need help. While I used to view asking for help as a weakness, I am learning more and more it is not. A toddler has definitely taught me this. I will also be implementing the extra 15 minutes, as you suggested. I think that is a wonderful idea. Thanks!!
Stop saying yes to everyone and everything! I have 3 different schools and sometimes i overlap myself which is very stressful.
I completely resonated with eveything you wrote. I have heard before about leaving a buffer but was never very good at doing it. After reading this I have new resolve to try again. 15 more minutes. Lord help me!
If I start my day eating something like this blog, I am more mindful of my choices throughout the day. Coming up on you busiest time of year….the last month of school. I have a meeting or end of year banquet or something every night for the next two weeks! I am going to find something to say no to, just not sure what yet.
*reading, not eating….tablet has different perspective on my life, apparently!
Thank you for the reminder to seek out my Best Yes ! I would love to share a copy with a friend in need ! 🙂
I’m going to allow more flex time in my schedule so that I’m not always skating in right in the nick of time. Thank you for sharing your heart. May God continually bless you and your family.
When I begin to feel overwhelmed I just need to stop and breathe and pray!
Thank you Lisa for being an inspiration to so many. I am the mother of 4 busy children & overwhelmed at times with all the responsibilities that come with it. Thank you for your Proverbs 31 devotions. They are a great way to start my day!
God Bless!
Scheduling an extra 15 minutes for tasks sounds like a first step for me. …..thank you!
I want to unrush by being especially intentional about my last few hours of each day. I want to be focused on my family. Not family chores or family laundry or family dishes…but just really relaxing and enjoying my family. My life sounds too busy for this as there is always something to be “done” during this time. But time is slipping away so quickly. I have to learn to slow down NOW and enjoy these precious gifts in my life.
I will add the 15 minute rule and a little extra prayer time! Breathe and let go of high expectations and let God do the job!
As a single person who works14 hour days, and is on call 24/7, the most simple things, such as laundry & groceries become a stressful activity. Being overwhelmed is a normal occurrence, a most unhealthy one,
Yes please. I must say that I’m scheduling a whiole WEEK of breathing room as I’m taking a vacation this week. And it’s going to be glorious!
I definitely need to add the extra 15 minutes. But for me, I really need to feel it’s o.k. to say no. No matter if I already have plans or am exhausted from a business trip, if called upon, I say “yes – sure no problem”
Saying no to others and yes to family, sounds like a good start!
Thanks for the encouragement, Lysa. Lately, I’ve been taking the time to look at what I have in the fridge & pantry– and writing the week’s dinner menu on a dry erase board. I’ll know what to take out to thaw the day before and the day of– I’ll already know exactly what meal prep will involve (even better if it’s something I can start in the morning). This saves me so much time & stress each day. I plan to stick with it.
Also, adequate sleep is crucial to my emotional well-being. I pay for it, when I stay up late. So I’m learning to wrap things up as early as possible and to prepare for plenty of rest.
I have always tried to have a 15 minute cushion, which worked great for me when I was single, but I’ve had to tack on another 15 minutes with a husband and kids (which doesn’t always work, as my husband tends to run “fashionably late” to everything), but I can at least stop and make sure God is a priority every morning before getting myself ready and waking the house so I’m not completely flustered when we head out the door.
Needed this message today. Started on Sunday running late to church then running out of gas and never got to church. I was so busy getting here and there I never noticed the low fuel. Need to slow down. Going to start working on this today.
ironic. I said ‘yes’ when a friend asked to read my copy. now I find myself needing it. daily 🙂
I also am a chronic under estimator of time & chronic over estimator of capacity. I have set boundaries within my week so that I have time to get the most important things done. Can’t wait to read your book!
Oh, how this is SO ttimely!!!!! Thank you.
I am going to strive to start my day in the word instead of social media. I want that to be the first thoughts in my head, not all the worldly expectations that I have tried to live up to which leave me exhausted.
I hope to gain some breathing room by reading my devotional first each morning.
Love your transparency from life in the real world…we all have those moments and I am grateful you have given us a place to share our struggles as moms. Your wit and wisdom is refreshing. Going to miss you in Derry, NH in a few weeks….my daughter and I couldn’t get in. Seems lots of folks need to hear your message of redemption, being a mom in this broken world, making good choices, etc. Your ministry is a blessing to many….keep on keeping on! Thanks for sharing your life stories!!!
Love the idea of adding a buffer zone. I will stay doing that; as well as spending the first few minutes of my day with Jesus.
*start, not stay.
Let go of the housework and go play with my kids!
I would like to get up and moving before the entire household. I believe I would present with a calmer disposition and be less frantic as I attempt to get the kids out the door for school.
I’m going to actually try to plan instead of just rushing into my day and attending to the item that screams at me the loudest (usually the thing that I’ve put off doing because it was the most complicated and/or unpleasant). First, though, I’m going to try to start my day with the Lord – that lost Bible story sounds all too familiar :). Blessings!
My kiddos are grown and out of the house but I feel the weight of a huge to-to list at work. I will try to work in more exercise during the day …
The way I am going to add a little extra breathing room into my life this week is to turn off my cell phone when I get home from work and get to bed a little early.
I built an Extra week into an important task, and now it seems like three weeks is the magic number. I removed myself and my expectations out of the equation, prayed for peace in this situation and to have the eyes of others to view the circumstance from their perspective.
I also set up boundaries and took a break from the circumstance where I could not contain my own emotions. AND I allowed myself a small and short private pity party.
Mostly I thanked God in those moments that He gave me a chance to effect change in others and more do that HE was in charge of it all because the burden was too heavy for me.
Thank you, Jesus,
I plan on on building in extra breathing room in my schedule by setting up boundaries to make sure that this happens. I have a tendency to overload my schedule, and then I end up feeling rushed and stressed most of the time. I long to see these changes happen in my life!
I am a working mother of six (ages 13-24 with one in college and five living at home) and have scheduled very little time for myself. I thought of all the things I wish I were accomplishing in my life and thought I would try to schedule a daily “Power Hour” in which 20 minute segments, not necessarily in consecutive time blocks, would be dedicated to (1)Bible study, (2)exercise, and (3)organizing my home office. My twins are graduating this June and my family will be visiting from out of state. I have set this as my deadline for having “arrived” at my goals. I will make “margin” in my life this week by setting aside time to begin the “Power Hour” habit. It’s all about discipline, after all, and we have to start somewhere. Day One of the rest of my life… Have a blessed day.
Taking 10-15 min to close my eyes and be still after lunch, instead of rushing on into the rest of the day. I know what a big difference his makes to reduce my frazzled ness in the last afternoon but I tend to rush on anyway. Also I’m going to take one thing off my list each day that isn’t set in stone.
Thanks for the great message and suggestions! I am going to be without wifi for 4 days so I will only be using my phone to *gasp* talk or text! And I’m sure that will give me tons of extra time.
To build in more breathing room I will make sure my kiddos set out their outfits the night before. I also recently make a separate “to-do” list for each day containing only the 3-4 most necessary tasks. This cuts down on my overachieving nature which encourages me to attempt completing TOO much in a day this causing me to rush and be grumpy. Blessings and have a great weekend Ladies!!
I’m not going to commit to anything for this weekend! No visits anywhere or invitations to anyone. This sounds really selfish and maybe it is but I have a ton of “projects” at home that stress me out when I see them laying around everywhere (curtains on my son’s bed that have yet to be hung, succulents ripped from a flower pot at my mom’s in a plastic bag waiting to be planted, a house that needs cleaning, etc.) My son is coming home from college next week for the summer and I’ve been so “busy” doing “other things” away from home (church, work, etc) that it seems to be in a constant state of disarray. As a pastor’s wife, I truly understand the obligations I have but I really need to learn to say no. My husband and I would both do others more good if we weren’t always coming home to stacks of mail, piles of laundry and dishes that always need to be put away. So, with that being said, I’m committing to NOTHING this weekend and I already feel good about it! Thanks for the reminder that yes isn’t always the right answer.
you go girl! digging in the dirt is good for the soul!
I am right there! Putting so much on my calendar I can not breathe! Worse I am letting people down. I must STOP! It is time to schedule breathing room. God is so good blessing us with HIS divine intervention through friends…..women……..those who are willing to share as you do via devotions, books, etc. Thank you SO much. We all get the same 24 hours a day……I will schedule the extra 15 minutes PLUS at least 30 minutes follow-up time for each meeting I have!! Others count on me to get things done right! And on time!
I’m going to spend less time reading and listening to bad news around the world and more time reading and meditating on the Good News! Oh, and I’m also going to keep my comments brief!
I am going to pack my lunch the night before. This is something I’ve tried several times but always seem to slip back into the old habit of rushing around and doing it in the morning.
I’m going to get to bed on time so I can get up earlier to have time to breathe, pray, and organize my day before rushing out the door in the morning.
Good Morning,
Boy this sums up my life in a nutshell, four kids is tough!!! Overwhelmed describes me quite often. Glad to know we all have those days. Thanks for sharing xoxo
I am going to also add the 15 minutes prior to leaving as well as I think I am going to limit my internet time, and replace it with quality reading time, for a book that I really need to win, “The Best Yes”. Thank you Lysa for your amazing writing, it has blessed me over the years!
Thank you, Lysa. I love your posts/devos. You breathe life into my weary bones by using God’s Word. I already have the Best Yes, so don’t enter me in the drawing. Just wanted to say thx. This blog post sounded much like me last week when I had a women’s retreat to finalize!
I have begun to heed to this very thing and I am finding that I am liking myself better. I have more time for prayer and study. I like many others am a perfectionist. I have many ideas that never come to fruition. Since I have been allowing myself to “fail” in some areas and not beat myself up when I am late or cannot complete all of the tasks of the day, I find that I am less stressed. Before, things still weren’t always done, and I was miserable. My family saw it, my friends knew it, and the outcome was just unfavorable. Now, I have prioritized better. I take time for family and friends, and I am amazed by how much Our Father still allows me to accomplish. My marriage is better and I am able to share what I have learned with other women (some of faith and some not). I would like The Best Yes so that after I read it, I would like to pass it on to others who will benefit from its content. Thank you for all that you do. God bless you!!
I am going to take a deep breath before giving an answer to being asked to do something or when my shoulders start to creep up. Thanks for the encouragement,
I saw an article this week about having a meeting with yourself on Sunday so that you can prioritize the next week & get a better handle on what needs to be done. I’m going to take the time to do that & see where I need to say yes & what needs to be a no.
Boy, I am so unrealistic with my time and it’s not to be wasted! I am a people pleaser as well and always have trouble saying “no” and usually end up asking my myself why I didn’t! However, progress has been made thanks to your writings and thoughts! It helps to know I’m not alone! Thanks for your work and encouragement through Christ!
I’m going to get up a little earlier and spend some quiet time with God and asking Him to help me organize my day!
I took a vacation to the beach this week by myself. I spent time catching up with OBS what happens when women walk in faith. I walked on the beach, praised, prayed, spent time window shopping and just resting mind and body. Now I am on my way to the women of joy conference. This week has been about me spending time with Jesus.
This year, I am working toward giving myself a greater span of time to get where I am going, building in a 10-30 minute buffer. I function better if I don’t feel rushed. But, when traffic and other elements I cannot control still upset the time frame, I am learning to breathe deeply, and just relax in the moment. I’ll get to my destination…eventually.
I was just talking to another mom friend yesterday and told her I am just overwhelmed. From homeschool to church positions and taxing the kids from music, sports and scouts. I don’t seem to have anytime to even clean. my husband also works out of town alot during the spring season so it’s all up to me. I think I have forgotten to stay calm and just enjoy life. I mean where do I find time when I leave my house by 2:45pm and don’t return again until 9:45pm what do you do. My kids aren’t eating til 10pm and by then I am done there is no more nice mom. I am ready for them to be in bed so I can get some down time, which is usually sleep because I am exgausted. I know something has to give but I am not sure what.
I am an exhausted mom!
I will take the time to breath and not rush by cutting my morning routine of reality TV as my background noise. I feel like I constantly have reality TV on when my kids are not home. The recording them when they are home. Then I accomplish very little and run late. I pray that God opens my eyes to my addiction in this area.
I am choosing to say no to requests this week without feeling guilty. Time spent in God’s Word will replace being on the hamster wheel.
I will sit and write things into my calendar, adding a 30 min buffer and be sure to adhere to my calendar. I will graciously say “no” rather than the impossible, yet doubtful “yes”.
I would LOVE to win a copy of Your best yes. I have heard friends tell me how great this book and I know in my heart I need to create Sabbath rest in my life and quite committing to so many good things outside of my home. Different details, but the same struggle you expressed can be a daily event in my home too. This week, I have been intentional about joining a yoga class, walking every morning and reading my bible at bedtime. I hung this verse on my kitchen wall “You will keep in perfect peace, him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in You.”
Your words once again have hut home! Thanks for sharing. I was just rushing in and out yesterday and a friend and I were having a this very conversation. Life is so overwhelming with the pace it seems we try to keep. My children are grown but there still seems to be no slowing down. We just move from kids to grandkids to elderly parents to slowing bodies, etc. I’m going to really work on finding a balance and try to slow something down!
Love this! Thanks for being real with us!!!
Breathing room…gotta have it. 15 minutes doesn’t seem like much time, but In the hands of the almighty God, a committed follower of Christ can experience the difference between frazzled crazy woman and grace filled wife, mother and co-worker. The best way for me to get that extra 15 is having my get ready clock turned ahead about 4 min and leaving that quick last minute “this will only take a second” chore for later. The 4 minutes is harder to calculate what time it really is 🙂
My husband has been helping me use my best yes/no for a few years now – even though we haven’t read your book yet. As our family transitions into a summer schedule, I plan to schedule some buffer time and down time. White space. This week I am hoping to start with me … my time with the Lord, some type of movement, and planning my day – with buffers! Thanks so much for sharing!
I love the idea of adding 15 minutes breathing room- I have been really focusing on your list of ways to positively say no to different things we are asked to do.
As tears of gratitude wash down my face, I prayerful ask God to show me how to build in that buffer –perhaps start by paring down what I agree to? I think eliminating items off my “to do” list will do just that….but I am Thankful for your words I so relate to and a God who knows just when I need to hear them Lysa!
Do I ever need to unrush? I am always running around in utter chaos. Thanks for this devotion. Needed to hear it. Would love to read your book.
Thanks Lysa for this message and for making it real! I, too try to squeeze every minute out of everyday and always come up short. Feeling overwhelmed and stressed as a result of failed completion of planned task and activities. I Need margins and boundaries in my life. I know this, yet I continue to take on more than I have the strength and ability to complete. Why do I continue to set myself up for failure day in and day out. Your blog is a gentle reminder for me today. Thank you and I’d love to have your book!!!
Most of my day is scheduled around appointments with students at their home and appointments to pick up and drop of my husband and sons at their jobs and schools. We have one car and it can be very challenging on the road all day. I have told my family that I may not always be right on time, but I will get there eventually. I am going to start scheduling my student appointments more flexibly. Instead of meeting at an exact time, I am going to give a 30 minute window of when I will show up. Then when things run over or the drive takes longer than expected I won’t be so stressed that I am not “on time”. The cable guy makes you wait all day, surely a 30 minute window is fair for a teacher, right?
I feel like you were sharing my story instead of your own!!! Today, I will…….ok, I have just sat here for 10 minutes trying to figure out how to build in the buffer. That is bad, right?!?! Hmm….I will stop in to my workplace 10 minutes before I would have so that I can get my daughter for a lunch date from school on time.
I already get up earlier in the morning…very early…just so I can spend time ALONE with God. Ever since I started that….being closer to God….just because so much extra special.
So…this upcoming week I will look at the “end of my day”. I will spend 1/2 hour cleaning things up so I do not have to attend to “those” things in the morning. Plus spend 15 minutes
in prayer. That’s my goal/assignment for next week and hoping I can make that a habbit. Of course…part of that prayer will be for MORE ENERGY. (;-)))
Lysa…thanks for all the time you put into your weekly blog…despite all the other “things/people” pulling at you. Thanks for being obedient…and caring. What you do does make an impact on our (readers) lives!!!
I’m going to tuck an extra 15 minutes in my morning by getting up early to begin my day with Jesus. I know by past experience it’s the best way to begin my day. God’s blessing to you all!
I am in a season right now where rushing around isn’t happening. My step-daughters are both in college (the older one is graduating!!!), we have entered our slow season at work, and the only one putting demands on my time is my dog, and he’s so laid back I’m starting to get jealous of him. lol So I’m going to take advantage of the lull and learn more about God, more about my faith, and more about who I am, but more importantly WHOSE I am. Then, in September, when the busy season begins again at work, I’ll be more able to deal with it without giving myself an ulcer.
My husband and I recently took a step of obedience in this regard. We created space in our week as a family by setting aside Sunday as our “family day.” We go to church as a family, come home as a family, eat lunch as a family and play, play, play!!! We enjoy being home together and do not rush off anywhere that day! Our 4 year old LOVES it! He looks forward to this time all week. Our 1 year old LOVES it! And my husband and I know that guarding our time on this day is worth it. Any way you look at it, God’s Sabbath principle speaks deeply to a healthy spirit – and family!
Great message. I like to wake up 30 minutes extra to give me some morning reading time. This makes a huge difference because I truly believe that reading His Word in the morning energizes me and sets the tone for the day, which is nothing less than spectacular! I would love to read the book. God Bless!
LOVED this! I so often feel the very same way. I am constantly rushing and yelling to my kids “hurry up we’re going to be late!” And there is always some crisis in the morning: homework that suddenly my son remembers he was supposed to do the night before but forgot etc. The idea of adding extra 15 minutes to the time we think it will take us to accomplish something is brilliant. I’m going to start getting up 15 min earlier so that I myself don’t start the day already behind and rushing.
I added Your Best Yes to my wish list several weeks ago knowing this book is a must read for me. I have been struggling both with saying yes when I should be saying no, and with the overwhelming reality that I have entered into the busiest season of my life. I now have teenagers that I have been homeschooling for twelve years and for the first time in my married life am having to work part-time to help make ends meet. With all these demands on my time, I can’t help but feel I am always letting somebody down. I struggle to find the balance and am desperate for a little time to take care of myself. All this to say I am working on being honest with myself…looking realistically at what I can give and with can’t. It’s not easy. I listened to you talking about this very subject on Focus on the Family…it blessed me greatly!
Today I will choose to keep a quiet heart as I yoke myself to Jesus and listen to how He tells me to use my time.
i need to wake up 15 minutes earlier instead of hitting snooze….
I am going to leave for work 15 minutes earlier so I don’t have to freak out in the unexpected construction zone or when someone is going 45 in the 70mph zone and I will get to work on time so I won’t have to freak out that my computer is not up and running and there are already 15 people in my nurse phone que wanting to reach their doctor asap so then I won’t get messages all backed up before it’s even 9am! Whew! I’ll let ya know how that works out!! Thanks!!!
Your post reminded me of one of my favorite quotes from Stephen Covey: “You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage – pleasantly, smilingly, non-apologetically – to say ‘no’ to other things. And the way to do that is to by having a bigger ‘yes’ burning inside.”
Thank you for this post. When you said “And yet another glaring reminder of my shortcomings” it was like you were talking directly to me. I probably say this more times in 1 day than I say anything else. I love your idea of adding a buffer. I’m going to factor in that extra time so my kids aren’t so impacted by my rushing. Thank you!
Don’t plan anything back to back. In addition to adding 15 minutes to my time plan, what a great idea, I pray to be more on time.
Helping my family to get into the habit of setting it all out the night before- clothes, backpacks, homework, and even lunches if I can swing it!!
Amazing how this story touched me and made me feel a since of relief to know that I’m not the only one like this! I am going to plan to get up 15min earlier in the mornings so that way I will have some breathing room. I am also going to try and start getting my children ready for bed 15min earlier so that way when it goes over they will still meet their bedtime! Hoping both will give me breathing time and to talk to God.
Love the buffer zone idea! Now just finding the discipline to implement it. Oh that’s right….lean into God so He can be my strength in my weakness.
Although my kids are grown up and married, I still seem to forget to schedule enough “me” time. I am also late for events and can’t “blame” it on the kids anymore. 🙂 I am going to start implementing your idea of the 15-minute buffer immediately! And I will “pencil” myself in the calendar for regular “me” time.
I really need this in the morning. Get up on time and stop hitting snooze for 15 minutes! I usually arrive just in the nick of time for appointments, work, church, etc. Mainly because I don’t like to wait for things to get going so I scoot in just at the last moment. I want to allow more time to get to Sunday School and work and everywhere.! Would love The Best Yes!!!
Great 15 minute idea…some breathing room would help my whole family. I’m going to try adding this 15 minutes at bedtime, too, to connect with my sons and husband before trying to fit in a little more rest.
I can so relate to the “rush” of daily life you have discussed in this posting. Every day I tell myself today will not be rushed, it is time to stop and smell the roses and enjoy your time with your family. To not rush my time with God, but no matter what I tell myself and how I schedule my time to not be rushed small things creep in through the day that I have to fit in here and there throughout my already planned “not rushed” schedule that turns it into a rushed race to the time to go to bed an half hour before time to get up finish line. I can use some helpful ideas on how to not rush through my already fast paced life as well as some tips on how to say no without hurting relationships or feelings when asked to add tasks to my daily schedule that is already packed. Is there time for breathing room, even time to relax to spend time for myself or a real quite time with God that is not timed into a schedule and given the time it deserves? I guess it goes without saying . . . prayer needed please. 🙂
To build in some breathing room, I will get up a bit earlier to get started on school lunches! This should reduce the stress in the morning. 🙂
Think I’ll lay here 5 more minutes and read another blog. And tonight I’ll go to bed earlier.
Now that the weather is warming up, I am going to spend some time in my hammock. It is not the easiest thing to get in and out of, so once I am in, I feel committed to stay for a few minutes. I just to remember to bring a good book!
I tend to hit the alarm clock just 10 more minutes and sometimes that ends up being 30 more minutes and throws me behind. I will really try hard to get up the first time. I’m sure this would help our household be more pleasant and I would not have to drive like a crazy woman to get my son to school on time… I really do need help!! LOL
I so enjoy my emails from you each morning..
Thank you so much
Julie
Well Lysa, today I have a busy one, MOPS, get tomatoes, get haircut, take hubby on a date. Hmmm, what will I do? I will take my Christian book with me, and after I get the tomatoes, maybe get to the haircut early,take a breather and read about wonderful ways to speak to each other, before I go home, cook dinner and take hubby to a jazz concert! God bless, friend.
After a rough week, I really needed to read this post. I’ve struggled with time this week and I don’t even have kids!
To give myself more breathing room, I also need to give myself that extra 15 min (instead of just the 5 min I’ve been doing…). I need to prepare my morning the night before. I’ve tried that in the past but never got into a routine. I always feel so rushed and stressed in the mornings. I long for that peaceful start! Now if I can just not change my mind the next morning about what I will wear that day!
Use my hourglass and actually watch the sand filter through a few times during the day to refocus, refresh and rejuvenate and concentrate on a scripture Psalm 46:10 Be still,….. Of course, we as women know silence will be the true challenge
Lysa
Your blogs are such a blessing to me. As a Mother myself, now on the downhill side of life I so relate to what you wrote about time in our lives. In these golden years I can now see the forest thru the trees. I can see how much I lost in the lives of my precious four children now grown adults themselves. I planned to do so much, yet failed. I planned to record so many moments, both on paper and in photos, yet failed. I planned to tell them more how much I loved them, yet failed. I planned to show them all that life would offer, yet failed. I planned to hug them more, yet failed. I planned to hold on to the precious memories, yet my memory failed.
So now I treasure each and everyday, taking the time to catch a rainbow when it magically appears. I take the time to walk in the rain, to hug a friend, to be kind to a stranger, to smile to everyone who I see. I tell my family I love them every chance I get. I share with the Lord how grateful I am for each and everyday I still awaken.
Thank you Lysa for being here for us all and taking the time to share.
God Bless
Pat
Thank you Lisa. 15 min is a good place to start.
Fifteen minutes sounds like a good buffer. I’m also going to try to start prioritizing better and eliminate some things that aren’t as important.
The best yes today…..adding 15 minutes to my expected time…thats good
Wow! This hit me right between the numbers on my watch! Taking it to heart and passing it on to others. I’m planning to schedule some breathing space in my day……right after next Tuesday…or maybe Wednesday….or definitely when school is out for summer. OK. I admit I have a problem. Thanks, Lysa!
I will add a little breathing time in my day today by:
Taking my lunch outside today…. sit in the sun, clear my head, and enjoy the time…. instead of sitting at my desk halfway working.
I am going to try to remember that if something doesn’t get done, then it’s not the end of the world. I was panicking just this morning because I realized that my son’s 3rd birthday party is tomorrow at a park followed by my husbands birthday party at our house and I don’t have decorations, food, or presents. I also have to work until 5 today, so not sure when I can go get everything and the party is at 10 in the morning. But then I realized, the cake is taken care of, and I have a couple of presents. I can grab some burgers, buns, and chips and it won’t take much time. And in a pinch, we can eat cake on napkins. So I am going to stop panicking. Everything will come together and when it does, it will be even better, because I won’t be stressed. This is just what I needed this morning. Thanks!
The Lord has been teaching me the same thing!!! Ecc. 3:1 To everything there is a season, and a time for every matter or purpose under heaven.
I make lists of things that I need to get done in a day or a week or an hour!!! Then I fall short and I am exhausted. I am learning my lists and schedules are not God’s!!!! If He wants me to get it done He will open up the perfect time for me to do it. He always does and He always reminds… ” This is the time to get this done”. If I need to discuss a matter with someone that could stir up strife and end in an argument I am learning to wait on God and He will open the perfect time to bring up the matter with that person when they are open to hear it and calm and I am aware that I must speak truth in love. He amazes me with the His time management skills!!!! 🙂 Elohim the creator of all creation!!!! The creator of all time and space… go figure!!! 🙂
I have no idea how to tuck more breathing room into my life. Between specialist doctor appointments, my own prenatal appointments, the last remaining days of my story time job…I’m just wiped.
I am excited for this baby to come because “no” slips out so much easier with a baby. I hope.
I saw myself in all that you shared today! Feeling like I need to always say yes rather than praying before accepting more responsibilities has left me in a mess so many times! And it is my family and my peace that suffer! I am committing to not accepting another “job” until praying through it first!!
Tuck breathing room into this week? How about just TODAY! My husband & I are leaving late this afternoon for a weekend get-away…just the two of us… No computers, no responsibilities. Get off the grid! But OH, how much I’ll try to cram into TODAY to feel ready. Like my little corner of the world will fly apart if I’m not in it for 48 measly hours. Seriously self, get over yourself! So, I’m committing to walk around the back yard a couple times today while my dog does his business instead of just sending him out there on his own. Just breathe! I’m going to be “finished” packing & fussing at 4pm so I can unwind myself prior to us leaving by 5pm. Anything that crosses my mind after 4pm will just have to be non-essential to the weekend. I mean come on, how world altering can it really be? The objective for the weekend is to unwind & reconnect, so I can start that TODAY to be more present & enjoyable for my man. There! I’ve said it. So be it….. 🙂 –SueB
Get up 15 min earlier so we can leave on time for church! 🙂
Thank you. I am actually leading a group of women through this book, and am struggling more now, than I was before!! Go figure… my husband gently reminded me just last night that our trust is in him and He will not disappoint… so in all of my frustrations and feeling really inadequate in every area of my life, maybe God is sifting my heart to see if I really am searching after him with all of my heart. I am so discouraged in my ‘performance’ as a mom and in my career, that I cannot even imagine keeping on as the study leader. I know the Truth, but sometimes it is tough.
Everytime I read a post from you I laugh because of how much I can relate!!! My breathing room moment for this next week will be to wake up 15 minutes earlier (which means going to be 15 minutes earlier) so I can relieve some of the stress of school mornings. That 15 minutes can give me te extra space I need to get lunches made and give a peaceful goodbye and send off to my kiddos! Can’t wait to try it!
I will aim to NOT reach for my phone during lunch and enjoy my quiet time and enjoy my food. 🙂
We have 4 sons in our home and I am the ‘finder’ of all ‘missing items’ 🙂
Rather than checking Instagram or challenging my husband to another game of Trivia Crack (he always wins), I will sit on the porch and enjoy my cup of coffee in the morning. We have lived in our home for 3 years and I have yet to sit on the front porch (gasp)
Thank you for sharing your words with me, you are such a blessing.
Sounds like my life daily!
Lysa, thank you for your reference to Psalm 39. It triggered tears as I’m overwhelmed with life right now. This morning I’m meeting with my Prayer Group friends and we are doing your Becoming More than a Good Bible Study Girl DVD and book study. I need that reminder that no matter how busy we are, we need to make time for being in God’s word.
I will get up without hitting snooze on my alarm to allow me the extra breathing room time. I set my alarm fifteen minutes early already to give me the time I really need to have the kids ready and leave on time without rushing, but I tend to talk myself out of needing it and sleep a few extra minutes instead. 🙁
I plan on saying no more often to things most of the time I don’t want to do. I plan on going to bed earlier and having time to exercise.
I am going to try to give myself some time during the day to just have some “unwind” time. With 3 boys under the age of 10, leading my small group in church, and going through court issues with my ex-husband it has been an overwhelming year so far. I need to find time to slow down…relax and “un-rush” myself so I can be the best leader, mother, wife, and friend that God wants me to be 🙂
I too am going to try really hard to just breathe! I want to relax, not be stressed and just enjoy life. Let go and let God……don’t worry, but trust instead…….have faith etc. “I have decided to follow Jesus, not turning back,NO turning back”.
If I change- things will change. If I’m different – things will be different. If I’m a good person, good things will come to me.
This is what I am trying to live by these days:)!
This truly spoke to me this morning! I am feeling like I can’t do anything right, this week I’m going to work on not comparing myself to the other parents around me. I also like the idea of avoiding my phone whenever I sit down.
I am going to set aside 20 minutes of journaling time. That’s my breathing room.
I tell myself often to “Inhale Grace, Exhale Gratitude.” This weekend I will practice that saying when I awaken slowly on a Saturday morning without the need to rush out to work. I will sit just a little longer on the couch with my hubby as we silently pray for our children and those we know who are hurting. And I will give glory to the One who deserves it all.
The expectations of others has driven me to a point of utter frustration. They make me feel guilty for not coming to their rescue when in reality I am the one drowning trying to keep up with multiple “demands.” Next week I am politely going to turn down others expectations and give myself a chance to be reminded of God’s expectations of me. I think I will take the extra breathing time and enjoy the outdoors watching spring bloom!
Hey everyone!
I am going to try the “15 minute breathing room.” I tend to leave my house at the time that I am supposed to be at my destination – a bad habit that I want to break. I also want to do better with making reasonable commitments.
A friend of mine once told me that each morning, she writes in her journal the things that she has to do that day. She then writes how much time she thinks each will take. Then she ranks them from most to least important, and this helps her manage her time wisely!
I am going to commit to doing this in my journal, and adding 15 minutes breathing room to each thing on my list.
Thank you Lysa for your consistent honesty and encouragement!
-Allie
I laughed when I read the blog today! Last weekend was the fundraiser for my son’s preschool which I volunteered to co-chair when it was a simple pasta dinner & silent auction and we had 10 people on the team…Then somehow 10 turned to 2, and us 2 turned a pasta dinner into a giant festival (still including a silent auction)….Then somehow us 2 are both moving out of state in the midst of planning. Funny….but not!
The weekend before our event, the timing was unavoidable and God took me to our new town to house and school hunt. The one thing I was supposed to take (my checkbook) was the one thing I forgot. It was as if God was saying “You need to trust me, and not your finances, to open the doors for all you need.” And He did! In less than 24 hours I bought a house and enrolled our 3 kids into 3 different schools for next year.
I’ve really needed some breathing room the past few months, and some gentle reminders to trust God in all things. He came through in a big way for me, and through it, I learned some very valuable lessons in giving grace in the midst of chaos, but I’d really rather not live in chaos….So, my breathing room is adding an extra 5 minutes per kid everytime we need to leave a location (not just the house)!
I love the idea of a 15 minute buffer! That’s brilliant. This week, I am not making any plans beyond my daily obligations because the last 2 and 1/2 months have been a little crazy.
I’ve added your book to my Reading List. I especially want to read how to: “Escape the guilt of disappointing others by learning the secret of the small no.” and “Rise above the rush of endless demands and discover your best yes today “
Lysa your words are always right on time. You have profound God given wisdom. Thank you for humbly sharing your life with us and inspiring us daily! So thankful for you and your ministry.
Lisa, thank you for your blog. The encouragement that you are not the only mom who deals with things like this is sometimes just what you need to keep going. Thank you for the constant encouragement always.
Goodness how I needed this today. Working full time, helping to care for my single parent grandson, caring for my 92 year old father, time for husband, my church and myself. I loved the verse……… Thanks for always being real Lysa!
It’s funny that I am reading this with my eyes barely open after a 13 hour day at school yesterday. We seem to enjoy the results of our labors, but my goodness, the work to get there is sometimes too much. Thanks for the “reminder” devotional today.
Lysa,
Thank you so much for your honesty! My life and yours seem very similar but reading your post today reminds me of how we are only human and sometimes our best is just not good enough! Life pulls us to and fro in an earthly tug-of-war with schedules and ourselves. This is why we need God’s word and time with Him each and everyday to survive this crazy world. Even if I only have five minutes with Him, I feel so much better and encouraged. You are a great mom, so don’t beat yourself up anymore. 🙂
I will shut my office door and have people think I am not in there so I can actually eat my lunch. What a concept ! 🙂
Thank you for this, Lysa. I really love that verse you gave. This week I will commit to adding extra breathing room when scheduling my activities.
Great blog post!
I’m going to turn off my phone after work 3 days next week so that I can get refreshed and do only what I’ve been told by God to do.
We all live such rushed hectic lives I love the 15 minute breathing room. Thank you for sharing your life with us
I’m going to prepare my lunches the night before. That way, there’s one less thing to do in the mornings before rushing everyone off to school and work.
Before my get hit the floor, I’m going to take a 5 minute me time.
I am trying to add some breathing room by teaching my kids to take responsibilty for things/tasks they should be doing…removing my guilt for feeling like I am failing if I don’t personally do everything!
I too have found myself “misplacing my Bible” and always at the most inconvenient moments. Slowly but surely I am making room in my and my families life by getting up 15 minutes earlier and starting out the day giving thanks to the Lord. Ending our day by reviewing it and what is to come tomorrow and thanking the Lord for all that we have received and all we have been able to give. Asking for the Lord to Bless our day tomorrow and relying only on Him and trying to rely less on ourselves. These little but monumental changes have cleared our hearts, our souls, soothed our nerves and opened our minds.
I love the idea of the 15 min buffer you offer yourself. I need to put that in my routine. I must slow down and take time to enjoy life.
I had a procedure done two weeks ago,so I have been unable to do many “normal” things. It has allowed me to spend a great amount of time with Jesus and I have come to treasure this last two weeks. I’m praying it’s a lesson that I can carry with me as I go back to work next week.
What a valuable lesson to learn. I believe the pay-off is bigger than we imagine, knowing what we now know about what stress does to our body as well as our soul. I’m making a commitment to go to bed earlier so I can rise earlier, and have a quality time alone with Father God before the day rushes in. Check out Max Lucado’s daily devotional “Grace For the Moment” — the first entry is “This day… It’s quiet. It’s early. My coffee is hot…. In a few moments the day will arrive. It will roar down the track with the rising sun…” It continues with multiple verses that explore the Fruit of the Spirit. Amazing, as is your input into my day also, Lysa. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability. Hugz&Blessingz, Millie Morrison
I am humbled at how the Lord uses these daily messages to speak to me right where I am! I have several studies by Lysa and each one is amazing….I had the pleasure of hearing her speak at Women of Joy-Gatlinburg 2 and it was as if I was sitting on the porch with a friend sharing wisdom. THANK YOU does not even begin to cover how much the nuggets I get from Proverbs 31 have been.
Kendra
I am going to commit to not answering yes or no for 15 minutes. I will get back to whoever requests something after I have taken that time to really think about if I should take on the task. Also, that will give me a chance to hear God if his answer is no.
Oh Lysa, I have been there and done that, especially when my children were younger and in public school. I have since learned to give myself a half hour buffer time. Fifteen minutes is good but a half hour just makes for peace and calm when walking out the door…..and we end up being early for everything! 🙂 Love your ministry!
Lysa n crew,
I had a similar claim with my sister on being overwhelmed and making the right decisions along with saying what needs to be said. My sister Margaret in her wisdom said—“PAUSE– then ask Holy Spirit to give you the words to say with your response.” What a profound statement! I’m still practicing and about 45% efficient—–but remembering more often.
In Jesus’ name we pray and give him all the glory!
Have a Holy Spirit filled day—-every day!
As a mother and a wife of course life can be very unorganized and crazy at times. My husband works long hours so I pretty much have to take my children everywhere with me, and yes we have been late a lot, but I honestly love this time riding in my mini van listening to christian music, and having lots of conversations about Jesus, giving them advice, and having their full attention. This week I will commit to leaving 15 minutes earlier and have more time to talk about the Lord. Thank You 🙂
I will set my clock 30 minutes earlier than normal. I’m always rushing to get my daughter to school on time. I will spend an extra 15-20 minutes before bed reviewing my responsibilities for the next day. In regards to work and school I will keep a double calendar so I don’t miss things. I don’t want to continue to rush. I want to be in a space to be able to hear God speak at all times.
Oh my gosh, I am so overwhelmed right nowwith a difficult job and actually was deleting my emails I would not get to today. Tried deleting this and it opened instead! Ha, figured God wanted me to read it. Thank you, I was going to try and say yes to something today even though I am frazzled. Instead I am going to rest and make a beautiful dinner for my husband who would like his cheerful wife back!
I actually took about 15 minutes this morning to stop and read a few Psalms myself. I was feeling guilty over not spending more time in my Bible and I just needed to read a few verses to lift me back up. It works!
I am going to commit to merely saying yes and no, and not being in a rush.
On Wednesday I realized that I had not sat down to relax with my husband or family in over 48 hours for all my commitments.
Today as we were supposed to celebrate our 4 year anniversary date. ..I pushed it back because I coomitted myself to helping someone for a few hours.
May God continue to provide you with insight and wisdom to daily share with us all over the place.
I am going to reduce my “To Do” list for today to only three things… down from a list as long as my arm! Going to try to be more realistic here! ;o)) Thanks for writing what I needed to hear!!
I’m going to stop recording one my weekly programs. This will give me an additional 30 minutes to an hour of additional time that can be used for something more meaningful.
Oh how I reLATE to this!
I’m going to commit to those 15 extra minutes whenever I need to be somewhere. Not only will this buffer eliminate the need for all those this-is-why-I’m-late-again excuses, but it’ll also leave me time for two trips to the car if I need them–a biggie for me since I usually have a lot of stuff to take with me and not enough time to get it all to the car.
Just think of how much better I’ll feel when I’m not having to crawl around and pick up the pieces of whatever gigantic pile of stuff I’ve dropped on my way to the parking garage! Not to mention the looks on people’s faces when I arrive, unflustered and on time. Will they ask who I am and what I’ve done with their ever-so-tardy friend? I think I’m gonna like this.
Thank you, Lysa!
-Jana
At I served as the Children’s & Preschool director. I was asked to switch and take over the Women’s Ministry and then be in charge of the Greeting Ministry at the same time. We were also a church plant. My plate was full and I didn’t know how to say no. I felt like I would be seen as slacking or not a really good leader if I didn’t have a million things to do and always have a smile, but if affected my attitude at home with my family. About 7 months ago my husband recommitted his life to Christ, turned his drug addiction over to the Lord and began attending church with our family. 3 months ago the Lord began to tug at our hearts that we needed a fresh start with a new church family. HE has shown us after visiting several churches where He wants us to be and the need is there for a children’s ministry director. It’s hard to say no but I know that the Lord has brought us here for a time of rest for me and growth for my husband and our daughters. I have to say no and take the time to be still and listen and be able to walk beside my husband in his spiritual journey and healing. It is hard to do but the benefits will be great!
I too underestimate the time it takes to do things, I think by more than 15 minutes. So I will start by adding 15 minutes to my estimate and see how that works for me. I will also get back into the habit of using my time to keep me focused. Then tasks won’t meander along and take up time I’d rather spend in other ways.
I’ve scheduled an evening that is mine. It is normally the same day every week unless I am traveling on that day then I pick another day. I make it so that I can not schedule anything else on that day and set it as an appointment so that I am reminded that I can not do so. It isn’t easy. There are many times that some fun or exciting opportunities come up on this day that I would like to participate in, but I remember that it is an appointment with myself and that it should be as important as an appointment that I made with anyone else because I too am important enough to have my own undivided time. It has made a world of a difference for me and I am so grateful that I have made to spend some alone time with myself and my God during this time.
Thank you for your timely post! I am going to try the 15 minute buffer as I also tend to underestimate how long something will take. I am also going to try being in the kitchen 10 minutes earlier next week to allow extra buffer time to love on my kids versus bark at my kids as we get ready for school.
Today I am going to sit at my high schooler’s track meet and leave my phone in the car! No distractions for 2 hours!
By stopping “people pleasing” and making decisions from a place of Fear. Asking more of God’s love in and for my Heart to unite with His.
I so need yo do this!!
I left the house last night and went to the store by myself for about 30 minutes. I actually remembered everything I came for this time! Going to take 30 minutes every few days for just me, sans four teenagers!
Just this week I have begun unsubscribing from all unnecessary Facebook groups, all unnecessary emails, and deleting all non vital apps on my phone. I have gone cold turkey so to speak. I still get the information I need/want but my time isn’t wasted by things that don’t add value to my life and I no longer feel the need to check my phone all day long and every time I wake up at night. 🙂
I taught Bible Study this year for the first time; BSF study on Moses. I realize after the ending of this study that the only way I will be organized and utilize my time to its maximum efficiency, is to be on my knees more asking God to help me with wise choices; asking His guidance and wisdom on setting priorities and boundaries and a balance of home and Bible Study. My focus needs to be on Him; it’s all about Him, not me and not focusing on His best for me and trying to do it on my own spells disaster and no fruit in my life or others.
I want to learn choosing His best for me and not floundering along in the flesh.
Sweet Blessings.
I have found that sniffing my lavender oil has really helped me. Yes I know the feeling of being stressed out I work with children all day and believe me being a perfectionist doesn’t help neither.
I calm myself down while they are napping and sniff my oil, it really has made a difference. I find that it helps my body and mind to come to balance.
I recommend it for anyone.
I will be completely “present” when in a conversation and not multitasking.
I really struggle with time management. This week, I’m going to not try to do so much stuff around the house in the morning (the kids’ dishes etc) so I can leave the house on time and not rush to work.
My daughter was recently diagnosed with ADHD. This has been the reason why we have a horrible time getting out the door in the mornings for school. I’m going to build buffer time into my wake up time so we have a little more time to process our tasks. Thank you for the wonderful advice!
I am going to just dive in from the chaos and start by adding the 15 minute buffet. Such a great idea and so do-able. Then my next step is to plan my day (either the night before or when I wake up.) I realize interruptions happen but having my day planned in writing will make handling interruptions so much easier!
I can so relate. I needed this. Thank you. I am a busy single mom. I feel we are constantly in a rush.
I want to start giving myself extra time each morning for prayer and study to get my day in focus before we start it all again. I want to continue to find more ways to unrush.
Thank you for your inspiring blog
I am going to start making a priority list to better manage my time.
Thank you so very much for being overwhelmed and having the morning I have way too often as a mother! Thank you for sharing, I am not alone!
I have to be more realistic with what I plan to do each day. I find I like to plan my “to dos” over a few days. That way I don’t forget important items. And maybe, just maybe, I’ll try to make my lists shorter, having time for “me”.
I am going to get up earlier for work so I can have some breathing room so I’m not so RUSHED in the mornings.
I am going to start delegating more – I need to realize that I don’t have to do everything for everyone.
Thanks for your wise Godly insightful words. We all want to do, do and do all the time, but God wants us to be still and Know Him every minute of the day. I am learning to be still and listen and pray for “The Best Yes”
I will use the extra time to take cAre of myself so I can better take care of my family
I am going to start asking God what things he really wants me to be apart of in my life. I really need to learn and listen to when I should say yes or no to things.
Love this post
-Randi
I am going to try to allow my teen daughter to do more things for herself and give myself more time for other things. Not that she is not a priority but it’s time to cut the chord and teach her to manage time before she’s fully grown.
Lysa i have been reading your books and you had inspired me in all way’s to loss my weight. Thanks for your wise Godly insightful words .I’ve scheduled an evening that is mine. It is normally the same day every week unless I am traveling on that day then I pick another day. Can’t wait to get this book and more books of you. Thank you again ,“The Best Yes”
I am extremely challenged with many tasks I need to accomplish, having gotten behind from having allowed responsibilities and too many self imposed burdens to overwhelm me. I have purposed to be faithful with the necessary duties as a wife, and homemaker, a mother, and grandmother, and part time employee and still be available for the Lord to interrupt my day, that He can use me in service to others. Here is my current consolation that I share with you.
Lord bless us! “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, and powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.” Eph. 6:12. They press against us in our daily lives, to bring discouragement and defeat, but you “alway lead us in triumph in Christ” 2 Cor. 2:14 You command us, ” let the peace of God rule (umpire – think about that) in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. Col. 3:15. Lord, today, I come, to find the practical through prayer instead of stressing over the list of items to be done. Help me still myself as a child weaned from its mother’s breast. Ps.131. This sets me free, free from the distractions of my own soul, and the weight of needing to involve myself in every matter that presses my heart. Now I position my ear to hear your voice, allowing you to direct my time and my day, and purpose to focus on the tasks that are necessary for today, and those others that stand out the most in my heart, including those unplanned, “yes”, items of service you present to me, so that my labors are not in vain. I can choose what I feel your Spirit is directing, and cast the rest upon you. And now I can breathe, and better yet, I feel your breath giving me life. And I am going to thank you for what I can accomplish, and for what I do accomplish, and choose to consider myself worthy of your calling because I’m doing my best to walk with you today.
Ladies, when your schedule allows, plan to accomplish as much as your required work in the morning as possible. That leaves the rest of your day for ministry (including to our family, like errands, meetings at school, sports, etc.). And can help us manage the unanticipated, unexpected, and other things that may be out of our control.
Please pray for me….my heart is to start a blog.
Blessings and thank you!
That’s a great idea. From now on I’m going to plan on adding 15 mins more to each activity. I always underestimate…
I read your daily devotional all the time. You cannot imagine how I have stood, stand and will stand in those exact same shoes, again!
I have daughters ranging from 6-32 and a grandson 3. So there are times I feel I run in circles to no avail of accomplishing anything but driving everyone and myself nuts, ready to hit the floor crying or wanting to bang my head on the floor, thinking that might resolve everything:)
I will try to arrange my daughters homeschooling and my grandson’s time just 15 minutes earlier so as not to have a clash in her school and his need of playtime. If I arrange a bit earlier he is content playing by himself or listening to her video streaming but gets bored the closer it gets to his lunch time:)
Lysa thank you for your realistic view of life and God’s love that covers our crazy world:)
Thank you and God Bless your ministry!
Naomi
My quiet times have been rushed lately bc my daughters been waking up earlier. I decided this morning, as painful as it was, to set my alarm earlier so my time with the lord wasn’t rushed. It’s hard getting up earlier, but he always seems to reward me when I do. 🙂
I always act like I have more time than I really do and I am known for being late. :-/ I think I could really benefit from your idea of a 15 minute buffer.
I am so busy with my kids’ schedules and as a teacher I fell like we are constantly on the go. loved this post, it was just what I needed. This week we are going to back off of activities and make sure we have at least one night home where the kids can play.
Wowser sounds like a splendid idea! I am going to set aside the time today to enjoy a little sunshine. It is a perfect day here in Rocwall, Tx. The wind is calm, the sun is out, it is not too hot & the bugs aren’t taking over. Thank you for your post. By the way, I always freeze bread, so mold stays away!! Take out only what you need, wrap in a paper towel & pop in the microwave if you need to thaw. If toasting, just pop it in the toaster. Hugs:)
I am going to start using a few of the convince items that I gave up a few years ago to start making my own. But now that we have have added some new smiling small faces to our family I have decided it might be time to allow myself to buy a few of those things again and be ok with it. It will free up a bit of time here and there for me to enjoy those little faces.
Wow…this is what I need today. To unrush. I need to breathe and be calm and let God help me with all that I have to do. Thanks for this message!
I’m a night owl. I stay up late… REALLY late, sometimes reading, sometimes being on social media, sometimes watching TV. I wake up at 5:45 really tired and hit the snooze button at least once. The mad rush to get the two littles ready for school, catch the two buses at different stops (at 6:40 and 7:05) and get myself to work by 7:45 ensues.
My plan to add and little more breathing room to my life is to be in bed with no electronics and going to sleep by 9:45 at the latest. Doing so, should allow me to wake by 5:30 with time for a devotional before starting the morning routine.
This is my first time on your website and I have to say that I plan to come back.
“I lost that last month and my teacher keeps telling me to remind you to get me a Bible. I have to bring one today no exceptions or excuses,” she said in a tone I was afraid mimicked the way her teacher said it to her. Clearly, I was greatly impressing this teacher.
And clearly, this was yet another demonstration that I was failing as a mom. Her Bible had been lost for a month and I didn’t have a clue. Awesome.”
In a matter of seconds I went from audible laughter in the first paragraph to actually crying in the second because it really resonated with how I’ve been feeling. Busy, planning 8th grade graduation ceremony and the party afterwards, it’s great, but coupled with trying to give some help at least to aging parents but mostly due to my own disorganization, I’m feeling like a lot of what I want to do with my child isn’t getting done, and I sooo do not want to have regrets, I so want to get this right. I think at least I’ll make a point to turn down the phone, either for a period at night, or maybe on our 20 min. drive home from school and just talk to him.
Wow such perfect timing! Just this morning I decided I was sick of rushing and went into work at 9:20 instead of 7:20. I sat and watched some funny animal videos with my 6yr old son and started the dishwasher and did some other picking up rather than rushing into work. I also cancelled an outing I had scheduled for this Sunday because it has just been non-stop and I need to refuel my tank. I was laughing so hard while reading your post. Thank You for making my morning even better!
I am going to try and say no to the things that are unimportant!
Breathe, just breathe….we need to stop expecting perfection as we are all imperfect people…do your best and leave the rest to the Lord 🙂
Today I would like to take a little time to read God’s word and take a breath of fresh air in between rounds of little ones getting sick. (While praying that my sick ones get better and the healthy one stay that way!)
I am going to try and delegate some of my responsabilities to my family. And seek God’s will for my life,
First, thank you! For being so real and transparent, for your vulnerability and relatability. I can get myself so guilted out for falling sorry as a mom, I often hear my husband’s criticism as “you’re a failure as a mom” although that’s not at all what he means. I’m so grateful for the reminder that There is no perfect one among us and I am the best mom for my boys as long as I’m being the best woman I can be for God!
I am going to stop feeling bad for saying or feeling “no” and seek God to ensure I’m giving my best yes, so that I can do whatever I do excellently for God!
This week God supplied the wiggle room with a cancellation and with doctor’s orders to stay off ladders (planned on trimming trees). I helped by saying no to a volunteer project that I would have resented giving time and attention to in the long run
One way I am working at giving myself more cushion in my life is going to bed earlier. I’m shutting off all the screens and instead quietly reading from an actually book. 🙂 I’m actually thinking about setting an alarm for myself like 9:30 pm and all screens are off. I’m not quite there yet but looking into how that could work.
Another way of cushioning is forcing myself to get up earlier before the rest of the house wakes up and get some quiet before the chaos.
Both of these are building a better cushion.
Thank you for your timely post! I’m going to try to get up earlier so I can make the best of my mornings.
Can I steal your “add 15 extra minutes” rule?!?! Oh my, my husband would be the first to attest that I always underestimate the amount of times things take! There are so many times your words sound like something I could’ve writtem myself…except you say them so much more beautifully 🙂 Thank you for your wisdom and courage to be vulnerable with others! I have a copy of The Best Yes, but would love to win another to give to another lady that I know could be encouraged by it…there are so many 🙂
I just had to laugh when I read the opening lines of this blog. So much like my life right now…four small kids, trying to help my husband with his business, I teach piano and do some photography on the side, plus so many church commitments among other endless “to-do” lists. I’m learning to delegate more tasks to my husband rather than trying to do everything my way, on my own. I also hate early mornings, but I’m realizing that I need to get to bed earlier (instead of trying to accomplish everything I didn’t do during the day) so that I can get up earlier and be more efficient in the mornings. And of course give myself some grace that if not everything is done, it will still be there for me tomorrow…or the next day…
Alone time with God first thing in the morning. Makes such a difference in how I react to others around me and also how I think things through. A good night’s rest without the interruptions of social media is a must!
I plan to slow down by putting into practice Isaiah 30:15 and 16. About returning and rest and in quietness and confidence shall be your strength instead of overdoing things and blowing it. Slow down and delegate some of the work load if possible and trust God. Kathy
So many times I have packed my day with stuff to do. Stop by visit a friend, take car to get tires rotated, run to grocery store and another grocery store and before I know it I am exhausted just packing the kids in the car. I forgot I was supposed to enjoy the journey yet I was so rushed I didn’t make time to breath. Today was a prefect example. I took my new baby boy (8 months old now) to work to see co-workers. I was up against the clock as nap time was approaching soon. I work downtown and had to pay for parking and walk to my office, one reason I haven’t taken my son sooner. I started to stress thinking I am not going to make it back home before nap, why did I ever commit to this. Well I slowed my pace and took a breath and realized what a beautiful day God made, why rush worse case Matthew takes a later nap and yes I won’t get my down time later (both kids napping together) it will all be ok it might even be a perfect day.
Yes! to all of it. Thank you for your vulnerability and encouragement.
I plan to fit a little extra breathing time in by setting up a daily bible lesson each day this week. I want to make the time to read 7 verses about God’s greatness and how to put my faith in Him as the Holy one!
I love your idea of building in an time block! I am going to try and put this into practice – especially in the mornings!
I am going to get up earlier in mornings so I can work on my Bible Studies when the house is most quiet.
I will build in beathing moments after my oldest child leaves for school and before my littles wake up. I will finish my hot cup of coffee no more microwave warming up and just breath in sunshine and warmth. Centering myself with God word before chaos can even have time to hit.
I work in crisis and have home visits (a lot). Adding more travel time to and from my appointments will give me more breathing room and help lessen the stress of my job.
Today as I go to bed I am going to stop and spend time thanking God for all He is doing for me and take a time to breathe instead of forcing one more activity in my day that overshadows what is the most important.
Go to bed earlier! So I can get up a little earlier and quietly get ready for our day with final plan of action for all involved.
I’m going to pencil in “Time with Debbie” to organize my list and make reassess that it’s in alignmhnment with God’s Word. I think a nice cup of tea will accompany me as I reflect on the list.
I’m going to focus on getting ready first and having my purse/keys/diaper bag by the door, then save things like loading the dishes, wiping the kitchen table and folding that last load of laundry for the end…if there’s time…which there probably won’t be because that’s why I’m usually running late!
I’ve been sick all week. The kind that you’re able to somehow muster though at work but as soon as you’re at home you just want to go to bed. Unfortunately with a child this is impossible. He needs meals, clean clothes, and quality time. I’m giving myself grace for my dirty house. I’m usually very anal (yes) about its cleanliness but I’m going to get over myself, buck up and spend time with my son and attend to his needs. The house will wait and I need to be ok with that…and missing events because it doesnt make sense to drain yourself further…
The 15 extra minutes sounds like a great idea! Also having a ‘launching pad’ where you put things you will need for the next day.
I am going to spend 15 more minuets in my garden with Jesus everyday this week and weekend. I can’t think of a better place to be.
thanks for your inspiring words.
Melody
I am a grandmother trying to help my divorced son with my three precious grandchildren and things I need to do and I forget that at 59 it takes me a longer to do things and that there are things I am no longer able to do. This week I am going to stop and decide what is most important for me to do and then let the rest go. Spend more quality time with the kids.
Thank you,
Jan
I’m going to make time to read scripture, and sing prayers; to remember the importance of this priority, whether done in the early morning and/or the eve.
Thank you for this blog. I have also been wondering what all my rushing and busyness is really doing for the kingdom and more importantly for my relationship with Him. I’m committing to seeking Him first and to delight myself in Him. Then I won’t “need” the “high” from the “but people need me” rush. He will show me where I am needed most.
Oh, I can so relate to your story! Very similar scenarios have happened in our house on quite a few occasions! Even though our boys are grown now and I no longer have to keep up with added responsibilities school days require, there are still those times when time is short and my energy is shorter. I came to the realization years ago that I have little to no concept of time, like most creative individuals. Even though I have learned to limit my commitments, I STILL get excited over the opportunity to fill a need or serve others. But the passion usually is overcome by the realities of daily life that I seem to forget all too often! I have learned to say no more often. Sometimes with regret later. It’s a real challenge to know which opportunities that come across my path are from God as part of His plan or are a distraction that will lead to unfulfilled tasks, self-criticism, and be a negative example to others.
Thank you for your honest sharing. It is humbling and comforting at the same time! God bless you in everything you do!
I am going to schedule in some time each day to have a quiet moment with God. It’s something I’ve been meanin to do for a while and I need to make it happen, now more than ever. My faith is being tested once again with some medical testing. The difference is that this time I am relying on His strength and not my own.
Thank you so much for sharing this! It cracked me up!
I really need to learn to say yes when it is important and not because I want people to appreciate me, or think I am organized or for approval—-bad habits die hard! I have LOVED reading your books…especially Unglued! I feel like you are speaking directly to me on every page! Thanks for sharing yourself again in The Best Yes….would love to win it but will buy it regardless 🙂
I don’t have a problem with sati get NO but I need to learn to sYou yes!
I am going to get up 20 minutes earlier to lay out clothes and fix lunches, before the boys get up and the chaos begins.
Lisa,
your message today was something I needed to hear. I am 66 and have decided to retire for my full time job. I am leaving Australia to live in Cambodia, to work with the poor and
do something worthwhile in my life.
I have been stressing about how I can manage without my wages and survive on just a
pension. But thanks to your message, which I believe is God once agin getting to me
and letting me know I am doing the right thing.
Many blessing to you and your ministry.
Norma Cooper
Melbourne Australia
On the Sundays we don’t teach Sunday School, it seems like we’re always later to church. 🙁 I plan to add in some breathing room, so we get there on time. It’s important to me that our boys don’t miss their worship and learning time and that we participate in all of worship and service.
Go to bed earlier so that I can rise earlier to have quiet time with God.
Oh, sweet sister. While some of these situations haven’t actually happened at our home, yet, I empathize. I often underestimate the amount of time that things take, and I feel the panic rising in my chest to the point of anxiety pangs. Thank you for this gentle reminder and for all that you post. Love, Your fellow Rick Springfield fan/friend
I am going to do my best to add extra breathing room to my life by simply giving myself grace. Remembering that I am God’s work in progress and I don’t need to be so hard on myself. Thank you so much for all of your articles. May God continue to bless this ministry and all those involved!
Great conversation starter<3 The comments hold fantastic strategies!
I leave for the school pickup 15mins earlier. I miss the queues, get a park and have that much time of peace sitting in my car. I pray, listen to the radio, read the mail. One time I even fell asleep. Im learning its not a sin to gift myself unstructured time 🙂
Peace & grace, Kim x
I am going to try to get up before everyone in the morning and I am going to get my self going so I am not rushing my son out the door to get to some place or another, simply because I was not as ready as I should have been.
I am so excited I stumbled across your fb page. I love reading everything you post and can relate on so many levels! It’s great to know we’re not alone in the everyday struggles and get some real life practical ways to apply the word. I plan to say no more and not over commit like I do. Slow down and enjoy the things actually worth doing. I also love the idea to build an extra 15 minutes into your schedule!! I too am very unrealistic with time and always underestimate how long things will take. Definitely trying that!
Trying to add daily Bible reading back in….even if it’s just 5 min a day.
To keep a healthy balance of yes and no in my life, I hold on to the thought that when I say yes to something I don’t really want to do out of obligation or guilt, I am taking that blessing away from someone who is good at that task and would really love to do it. I look forward to reading your new book on the subject, Lysa, I’ve been leading a study on “Unglued,” and God has used your words in a mighty way in our group. Thank-you for sharing your wisdom in such a delightful and down to earth way.
Trying where I can not be stressed and rather plan for things rather than just waiting to wing it.! Write down the tasks I do on a daily basis so I can see what’s working and what’s not and eliminate what isn’t. Schedule buffer time on each task I choose to do. If I’m studying for an hour and a half. Set apart 2 hours and then take a proper break after
I’ve been looking at your book, saving my coffee cash, and practicing what I read here and hear on the radio. To win a book will be such a gift!
Not worry about doing things perfectly. For example cleaning my house but not thinking I have to spend extra time doing it perfectly.
I plan wake up a few minutes earlier so I can be 100% ready before everyone else wakes up, take a breath for myself, or just be able to leave the house happy and not stressed.
I’m going to wake up earlier to unrush our morning before school.
Breathing room…that’s not a phrase I find myself using very often. I work so hard to maintain a level of peace and calm for my family, but life swoops in and *poof!* When I start to feel hurried and stressed, even if late out the door to school and work, I will physically pause myself, and my kids, and just take a few moments to breathe and pray for extra patience and calm. It won’t only be good for me to do for myself, but for my kids to see that role modeled.
I am going to get up early, do a lil stretching and working out so that I can put my mind and body in motion before I have to get the rest of the family in motion. This means a 5 o’clock alarm!! But less stress and rush because I will be ready before the kids have to get up!
I’m going to tuck some room for forgiveness. I tend to get so overwhelmed sometimes with time, kids, work, etc., that I find myself forgetting something and I’m hard on myself thinking, ugh, what a bad mom or I could have organized better.
Next time I am tempted to volunteer to organize something, I will wait 24 hours before I say yes.
If I can make myself get up earlier (I already get up at 5:15) I wouldn’t be in such a rush in the mornings getting the kids to school before I have to go to work. I will try to work on that and give myself a little time for devotional. I can’t wait for First 5 to come out!
This coming week I am going to be more diligent about waking up when I am supposed to (and not hitting the snooze button repeatedly) so my mornings start off the right way and not the frazzled way!
I so needed this today… well, really, I need it every day, so thank you! Just this past week, I found myself finding comfort in my three year old reminding me that life is lovely and it’s important to step and smell the roses (in her case, pick the dandelions) – in case that wasn’t clear, SHE reminded ME! My hope for the coming week is to keep this verse in mind and be uber intentional about the way that I spend my time as this subject has been heavy on my heart lately… I coincidentally just submitted a prayer request earlier this week as well in search of the same serenity. My first step will be in allotting more time to prep for even the simplest of activities to help prevent myself from constantly saying ‘hurry’ or ‘we’re going to be late’. We miss out on life’s beauty when we rush through the day to day joys that can otherwise be overlooked in the usual hustle and bustle.
Im going to take 3 deep breaths when I start to feel myself get anxious and rushed to remind myself that everything works in God’s timing and according to His plan
I’ve gone over my calendar for the week and more realistically scheduled the time I need to be leaving for appointments and commitments. I’ve added some reminders and alarms into my phone to help me prepare to transition to the next event. I’ve also started writing in down time. I feel like I have permission to take a nap if it’s on the schedule. 😉 I still feel overwhelmed a lot and guilty that I can’t keep up like some of my mom friends but I keep reminding myself that doing my best may not look like someone else’s.
In order to put an end to my rushed, stressed mornings, I moved my workout to the evening. And I replaced my morning workout time with bible study. This has been my new schedule for 2 weeks and it has made a world of difference for my mornings and my entire day! My days start relaxed and with a peaceful mind and heart…and carries me through the day. Starting my day with God has improved my life immensely.
I’m going to focus more on forgiving myself and remind myself I’m not where I want to be but I’m not where I was.
Well I know exactly how you feel. I agreed to help plan a school carnival (for a school my children don’t even attend anymore) and only one other person decided to help with the prep work. Overwhelmed would be an understatement for me. I definitely have a habit of underestimating time and overestimating my capacity. I have your book next to my bed and as soon as I finish with all of my current commitments I am going to read it and figure out how to only commit to the things that God wants me to do. Thank you for the honesty and the reminder!
I have decided to evaluate my schedule and not to say yes too quickly but to rather answer I will see if I can assist and then to not over commit myself. Also to plan the next day the evening before. To makes sure I have everything ready for the next day and to add time in between.
Not sure
I will tuck in more time to just have some me time with Jesus and just be still. Thank you so much for sharing! Love from the Netherlands!
Try to not over commit myself and allow a little more time in between appointments. It’s usually that “one last thing” I try to get out of the way that makes me late. Trying to remember to not do it at that point.
I’m on vacation this week but I have been trying to incorporate this into my life more and more. I recently stepped down from a very involved volunteer position at my church. ..this is going to be so good for my family.
Thank you…I needed this. My daughter will be married in two weeks at a barn wedding. We just learned (lon story) that we cannot use the barn and our caterer may not be able to handle the new arrangement. I will stop and read and reread this scripture this week as I breathe knowing the Holy Spirit’s appearance and the hearts of my daughter and her love are all that matter. Thank you.
I have been wanting your book so bad…I hope I can win it!! I’m going to attempt to prepare for mornings the night before to create less stress in the mornings. If I take 15 minutes before bed to get backpacks ready, pack lunches and lay out clothes I think it would give me that breathing room and help make mornings less chaotic!
I stumbled across the blogs here on Proverbs 31 ministries and love them. Thank you for obeying the Lord in His calling to minister the word to others.
i am going to think about how much better things will go if I slow down, think about my routine, and make time to prepare for people, home and work. I don’t want to short change the family I love, the home I live in, the job I have. I want my reputation to be one that shows I love God and I am dependable.
Thank you for this this morning. I tend to always just lay in bed 15 minutes after the alarm. I am going to actually try and go to bed 1/2 hour early so when the alarm goes off I won’t feel the need to take the extra 15 minutes.
I am going to add extra time to my morning routine. I don’t give myself enough time to start my day with just a 15 minute devotional(which I need), because it puts my mind, body, and attitude where it needs to be. Plus, I’m not running around like a chicken with my head cut off. 🙂
I wake up 2 hours before the time we have to leave the house. I like to get everything done and still have time to breathe so those last minutes issues can be addressed. Throughout all this, I ask for Grace from the start to finish of the day.
being able to relate to this is an understatement! I’m always so encouraged by your words. Some days I feel like you’ve been looking through my own windows. Taking you’re idea of adding 15 minutes to any task is something I’ll have to try. Although my biggest challenge is still deciding what to say yes or no to. Still learning. Thank you for your honesty and transparency.
I would like to lean on the Lord more fully Saturday mornings spending time with Him and being fully motivated to complete His priorities in order to rest in Him on Sundays.
Thanks for your honesty. As a kindergarten teacher 15 min. In class seems like a long time but I then think of the wasted time at home that 15 minutes more with God could make a great difference!
I am going to my twin goddaughters’ first Holy Communion today, and in planning my morning, I was going to try to run to Barnes and Noble for a gift and then run to my classroom to get some work in before heading to the freeway to get to the service. I was feeling guilty that I am, in actuality, not rushing or running anywhere. I’m enjoying the quiet and I’m taking my time instead of rushing. Now, I’m going to forgo the classroom plans, pray about my time today, and enjoy the service and celebration without worrying when everything will get done. I do have to be careful not to procrastinate, so my prayer will include having God’s discernment. Thank you! 🙂
I plan to do morning preparations in the evenings from now on so my mornings aren’t filled with chaos and stress (“I can’t find my socks” , “where are my shoes?”)
I keep a running list of things that need to be done. Housework, errands, shopping, etc. Weeknights I pick some things to work on with the promise of quitting by 8 pm to wind down with family. It also frees up my weekends for family, friends and church activities.
This is my first time on your website and I have to say that I plan to come back.
I think at least I’ll make a point to turn down the phone, either for a period at night. I too, like the 15 min. buffer for activities.
I like to have just a few “must dos” in my day, and everything else is “optional”. Usually, I get to at least a few things every day on the “optional” – that makes me happy, and what doesn’t get done just gets pushed to another day’s optional. Eventually either it gets done or I realize it never needed to be on the list in the first place.
I am almost always late for appointments, usually by about 10 minutes. From this point forward, I plan to write appointments in my planner as 15 minutes earlier than they are actually scheduled. This way, I should now be either right on time or maybe even a little early!
Thank you so much for your article on being overwhelmed, it is exactly what I needed to hear today! The 15 minute time buffer is a great idea, I have had a lot of trouble with time management at work and home and am now behind at both places. But your article and God’s word have given me new ideas and reminded me not to worry but to pray about my needs and thank God for his answers.
Today I shall commit to leaving my computer at work where it needs to stay and take that time to be in The Word. I pray my 9 year old takes note of it:)
I have been working for the last few months on launching a ministry blog. For the moment, I have been working on bringing on other writers — and I have been spending most of my time revising writing, meeting with people, sending emails. I have totally been ignoring my kids, rushing here, rushing there. I can’t keep up! I would love to win a copy of this book and learn how to balance ministry and motherhood — because right now it feels like I can’t do a good job at both.
I will try tucking away those moments at the beginning of the day before my kids get up. I know it will help them and me. I am disabled, bedridden and very depressed. I pray for healing to which doctors say there is no cure. Lots of pain and doubt but I know our God is Good and in time I will see no more pain and no mor tears.
I am going to try making school lunches the night before. I hope this will reduce the morning rush/stress.
Taking a deep breath; accepting I can’t do it all and its okay. Making time to seek God in prayer for Thanksgiving, wisdom and guidance. Prioritize my “Yeses” and stand behind my “Noes” without condemnation. That’s the plan 🙂
I like the idea of waking up earlier to find a few minutes to myself. If that means a quiet shower or a coffee with a little devotion. I usually wake up to the kids and it quickly turns into a rushed, yelling kind of morning. Really enjoy your books and look forward to hearing you speak at Hearts at Home in Rochester
Laura
I am allowing breathing room by going on vacation and taking time to rest, rather than planning something for every day of the trip. This time, my vacation time will be filled with restorative rest and spiritual rejuvenation.
I’m making time in the day for praise and worship while listening to music as I walk and jog in our field. This helps my spirit, my body, my emotions, and my mind!
I am going to make time to get up early before the morning chaos hits and also try not to let me teenagers stress me about the little things!
I am going to wake up 5 minutes early, so I’m not late for work anymore or feel so rushed to get there to clock in with one second to spare!
I’m going to get up 5 minutes early to spend time with God and read devotion. I’ll particularly pray for focus, direction and timeliness. Starting my day off with Him will get me in the rythem of unrush! May God continue to bless your ministry…it is truly a blessing to moms like me.
Thank you for the reminder to build a buffer into each day. This week, I will get up 30 mins earlier, to allow more time to spend time with the Lord, for a great start to the day, instead of trying to squeeze time in for the Lord at the end of the day. I will also schedule the 15 min buffer into activities during the day, to minimize the stress of being late, or not getting things done on time. I would love to win a copy of your book. I have been wanting to read it for some time.
I am going to enjoy these few weeks of summer hiatus from my church’s youth life groups and girl scouts before my summer by participating in women’s Bible study tp recharge my own battery. No more ripping and running for a month or two.
I’m going to prepare the night before for our days so I can allow my family the time they deserve and replenish joy into our mornings. I don’t want my kids to remember me rushing them every day. Heard you at NewSpring church today. Thank you for an amazing testimony.
I’m going to go to bed 15 minutes earlier to get a better start on the next morning. And I’m going to start dinner 15 minutes earlier than I think I need to.
Wow I needed this today and I need your book as I am so having difficulty keeping it all together. HELP!!!!! and thank you for your blogs so insightful.
Today, I will commit to my personal filter. My 24 hour rule will be implemented…I will not make a decision without my 24 hour personal grace. My intention is to be happy on purpose…to engage in only what is positve and leave the rest. To unload the extra; as I let the excess slide off my back. Today, tomorrow and next week…I am letting go of what is unecessary in my life-for no other reason than it is heavy and I need the room to glow. And last, but not least…commit to my bible, and return my house to our home. Thank you, and thank you tomy friiend-(DJ) for sharing it with me.
My plan is to get up earlier and do a few chores so that everything doesn’t have to be crammed in to the evenings after school and work. I need prayer. I so want to win a copy of this book. I’ve wanted to read it forever. 🙂
I felt the same way this weekend and the message at church Sunday was about observing the Sabbath and that it was intended for us to rest. So I went home for a nap. I plan to stop the texting and TV after work every day and, instead, use that time to read and to watch sermons online.
Lysa,
It’s funny how things work. I had picked up your book Unglued about three years ago, and had never found the time to read it. As a mother of 4, just turned 40 stage IV cancer survivor I have been through my fair share of Unglued and later regretful moments. Today I awoke to an all time low, overwhelmed with life. With ALL my good intentions….I knew I wasn’t going to measure up to all I thought I needed to accomplish to be that PERFECT WOMAN and PERFECT MOM. Teary, and feeling like a failure I called my step-mom. In all her wisdom she didn’t hesitate before saying, “Kim, sometimes doing EVERYTHING means doing NOTHING. Just sit quietly and let the GRACE of God fill you up. STOP trying to muscle your way through life. It’s kind of like being out on the water in a sailboat on a calm day. We have the choice to start the motor or pick up an oar and row, or we can sit quietly, and wait for God to fill our sails with the wind that will move us.”
I hung up the phone and immediately closed my eyes. As I laid silence, I cried and prayed that I could feel that wind. Slowly my breathing slowed and I felt a peace, that I know so well. Shortly after I remembered the one story about the towels I had read several years ago, and went in search of your book. Now pouring through the pages, I find myself saying over and over…..”that’s me”, “this is my imperfect life.” Thank you! Thank you for being real and reminding me I need to continue to be real and accept that I am imperfect, that I will come unglued, but with perspective and God’s grace make PROGRESS!!! Progress I hope will reflect in the live of my little ones!! God Bless!
Kimberly
Oh, how I wish I couldn’t relate to this! However, I have 3 boys ages 4 and under so I know this feeling all to well! I can be so excited about what we’re doing that day, but till I get them all dressed, packed, and loaded into the car I just want to stay home and take a nap! This also usualy makes me pretty snappy
Oh, how I wish I couldn’t relate to this! However, I have 3 boys ages 4 and under so I know this feeling all to well! I can be so excited about what we’re doing that day, but till I get them all dressed, packed, and loaded into the car I just want to stay home and take a nap! This also usualy makes me pretty snappy
I hope to relieve the stress of getting out the door with all the kids by allowing myself extra time to get ready and pack their things, even if that means getting up earlier (Gasp!)
I’m going to follow your lead and add a buffer to my completion time for tasks.
I spend time with the Lord…and deep breathe
pray for heavenly perspective and peace.
I recently read “The Best Yes”. I had been drawn to this book for some time but felt like God was leading me to say no to things in my life and wasn’t sure I needed to read a book about saying yes. In God’s perfect timing this book and I met and it has definitely helped me in my walk with God as I have begun to declutter my life and prepare for my Best Yes!
Before I eat breakfast I pray for my loved ones and give thanks for His blessings. Instead of complaining about my beloved husband’s death. I thank God for the time we had together.I try to plan ahead so that mornings are not rushed.
This week I’m going to set boundaries and learn how to say no. I need the space! Thank you, Lysa, for sharing your heart.
I am going to take 10-15 minutes and add to my to do list. When I have that time of the day, I am going to go outside and just listen to God and to nature….enjoying things that I don’t take the time to enjoy.
I always have a huge to do list for after work and get myself frazzled trying to do several things at once
Now I plan to do one thing at a time and just be happy that one thing is off the list.
the list is never done anyhow! As things come off the top, more things are inserted…
It’s never going to be done. I will consider progress to be success 🙂
I love your suggestion of giving myself 15 extra min of time to get things ready. I am hard on myself as well when I am failing to be on time yet again or when I am not prepared. Why do we talk to ourselves in such a negative manner? It is so easy to be our own worst enemy. Without the Lord, life is so hard and sad. Thank you for your honesty and encouragement, I can’t wait to read your book the best yes!!
What a reality check for me. I think my family is always demanding so much from me but in reality it’s me who is demanding so much from me. my “to do” list is Neverending and I need to cut myself a break .
Thank you for sharing! I sat in the car today, after 5 hours of intense business meetings, heading to kids activities etc etc, so overwhelmed-then just prayed for His wisdom and peace. For me, getting up when alarm goes off instead of snoozing is my commitment this week and reading my bible or devos during lunch both would make my day better.
I try to make a list the night before a big day. I then rewrite the list in order of what absolutely HAS to get done. I also write them in order of how I’m going to drive. For example if I need to go to the post office and the dry cleaner is on the way I put them on the list one after the other. Sounds crazy but I can check 2 things off and not feel like I went out of my way.
Thanks! Another thought is that psychology says that it takes 3x as long as we think it will to do anything. That’s kinda not realistic to allow 3 hours for a one hour project, but I have found it to sometimes be true. Thanks again.
Schedule my time with God first an then take on the world keep it simple pray then pray some more.
I was like that when I was younger. I misplaced things… Fortunately, God graced me with helpful children who realize Mom’s paid job could be stressful but they felt the love and sacrifice for them was a greater priority…I would get up from bed as soon as I woke up earlier, say my ‘gratitude prayer for another, got their breakfast and school lunch prepared, ‘ bless’ my children before sending them off to school…and then proceed to church for daily mass take a breath in front of blessed sacrament before driving off to another chore…thanks Lysa, your blogs remind me of my late husband who could finish my sentences and although only God could read our minds, my husband was so much in tune with what I was thinking…
yaumentado@gmail.com
OHHHHHmagosh! Talk about speaking truth straight into my life. My life is rushy rush rush! ughghghghgh! Really and truly over the past couple of months I have really been spending time and prayer on this and how to feel better spiritually and physically. I joined the gym, something that actually takes time, not saves it, but the goal is to feel better and to make priorities. God has to be at the top of that list of priorities and carving time out for him and then I hope other things fall in place. I loved what you said, “I’m learning how important it is to be more realistic with assessing both how much time something is going to take and my capacity to fulfill that task. Knowing that I tend to underestimate time and overestimate my capacity, I must build in a buffer.” UMMMM YES!!!!! This is it, this is the next step to help fix my CRAZEEEE! Thank you for writing, thank you for inspiring, thank you for speaking God’s sweet truth into our lives!
I rush from getting ready in the morning to planning meals and eating times, to school to homework, while feeling guilty for not spending enough time with God in-between. One thing I will do is look for ways to help others. I need help balancing taking care of myself and serving others. My timing is off. Seeking His truth in the mist of storms. Even if the storm is in my own head, I want to hear.
May I please receive the book?
This is a great reminder that we may have more in common than we think. Also, that the ridiculously high standards I place on myself are not as helpful as they seem when I was creating them. To impose them is an unloving and unforgiving thing to do.
It is so nice to hear that I am not the only mom to go through this in the morning or through the course of my day. I have four kids and my mornings go exactly like that. I am grateful for how transparent all the P-31 women are!!!
I started a new job. The way I tick few extra minutes into my day is tip get my clothes out and take a shower the night before! This has saved me time and stress!
TI started a new job. The way I tuck a few extra minutes into my day is to get my clothes out and take a shower the night before! This has saved me time and stress!
As I look back on my life of 61 years, I see that I was that woman you speak of. I was brought up in a non Christian home where everything had to be picked up and perfect. Don’t get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with a clean house and balanced meals, but I see now that I was rushing to do want I thought was expected of me and not what God had planned for me. I never sought Him and through Him received guidance and “The Best Yes” to my choices. As I go forward as a grandmother it is still hard for me to leave the dishes and play with my grandchildren when they visit. I am getting better at it and praying for God to take my burden of “a clean house” away from me so my time is spent with them. I am still a work in progress but I see the joy God has brought me through my grandkids and try to put the dish towel down and get out the games.
Thank you Jesus for the people you have placed in my life. Help me to take advantage of all the joy you have given me and to continue to grow in you. Amen
I was privileged to attend the Women’s Conderence 2015 in Lubbock, Texas. I am going to be honest. I first saw Lysa in another Conference being a guest speaker with JenniferRothchild in 2014. I had my doubts about Lysa possibly being real and true and didn’t pay much attention to her speaking. Well now, I am totally blown away and love that God works through her to reach people like me…skeptical….I took on and am finishing up the #OBS walk in faith and am leaving with tears of joy. So I ask Lysa to please forgive me for this stereotype made on her. She is a beautiful spokesperson for God and I am excited of the first 5 impacting many women around the world. Again, I am deeply sorry for this crazy mindset and I am going to continue following Proverbs 31 Ministeries to become richly blessed. I Love you Lysa and girls at Proverbs 31 Ministeries. Keep up the great work in Jesus name!
Priscilla Vasquez
Awesome post. This is definitely a rebuke from God. I need to take a break after reading this post because just by reading this I realize I havent taking a break to just breath and take in what He is doing in my life and this Ministry. We normally go 100 miles and hour trying to take care of other and other things, we forget about ourselves. Well I’m going to take my breather now and work on this in my life. Thanks for sharing.
Oh! What a supplement to my Best Yes reading today. I’m midway through the book. A book God has whispered in my ear for a few months. An emergency therapy appointment because I am coming undone at the seams led me to finally obey and read. I look at the mess my life has become, and I am convicted by the consequences that I chose when I was using busyness as a coping device. The more time I spent giving myself away, the less I had to focus on my hurting reality. Busyness = bad god with a little g. Thank you for your wisdom, Lysa.
Hi Lysa. I live in Centurion, South Africa and I have just done your 6 week course of “Unglued” and it was awesome. What got stuck in my head was “I am able to….” Next week we will be starting “My best yes” and I can not wait to start!!!!!!!