You deserve to stop suffering because of what other people have done to you. Sign up for Proverbs 31 Ministries’ free Online Bible Study of my new book, Forgiving What You Can’t Forget.

The six-week study has just begun! It’s not to late to join us. 

l

When Rejection Steals the Best of Who I Am

October 22, 2015

“We don’t need you there.” A simple sentence. Five words. Five syllables. However, in my brain the interpretation of this sentence was anything but simple.

It unleashed a flood of uncertainty. My brain instantly fired off locator arrows that traveled to past rejections in my memory. Past hurt was pulled into this current conversation. Suddenly, I wasn’t hearing “We don’t need you there.” I was hearing, “You aren’t wanted.”

Rejection always wants to steal the best of who I am by reinforcing the worst of what’s been said to me.

The best of who I am was certainly not the one interpreting this comment.

The most hurt version of me took what was said and added pages of commentary. This additional dialogue highlighted my insecurities, brought to mind all the many reasons I was surely being excluded, and vilified the person who uttered those five words that started this whole thing.

Suddenly, this person was unsafe. She was insensitive. And worst of all, I pictured her rallying others to believe the worst about me as well.

If you’ve had these same thoughts and feelings… I understand. And I’m sharing more about the 3 perspectives I’ve learned when it comes to rejection over at (in)courage today. Read the rest of this post here.

You May Also Like…
To the girl whose hurt cannot be undone…

To the girl whose hurt cannot be undone…

To the girl whose hurt cannot be undone…  Forgiving can seem impossible when the other person has not just affected a season of our life but affected us deeply every day since. Unchangeable wounds feel so very unforgivable. I agree; the person who hurt you should...

Does God Even Care About Me?

Does God Even Care About Me?

“We know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28 (ESV) In 2015, The New York Times ran an article called “Googling for God.” In this article, author Seth Stephens-Davidowitz starts...

Help for Your Relationships in a New Therapy & Theology Series

Help for Your Relationships in a New Therapy & Theology Series

When we’ve been deeply hurt, whether by someone or by circumstances outside of our control, we often wonder if forgiveness is even possible. What if they never say they’re sorry? What if things will never feel “normal” again? I have wrestled with these questions too,...

8 Comments
  1. carolyn r

    Hi Lysa, Thanks for this. God always uses the daily messages from Prov 31, First5, and you! to speak to me…it really is amazing. Talk about that NOT being a daily coincidence. Anyhow, this really spoke to me because I’m finding out this week if I received a job/promotion and I actually don’t think I got it. But, you all help me to trust God, see the gifts He’s given me and trust He’ll put me in the right place (and not heap my own rejection on top if I’m told I didn’t get it). I’ll know instead He’s saving me for His own better plan! Thank you 😀

    Reply
    • P.Selvaraj

      Very pragmatic!

      Reply
  2. Kim

    While reading your post about your next book dealing with rejection, I want to say Thank You for making God’s word visible through your stories. “Live Loved”…
    Between your lines, I read:
    Live from that abundant place (Strength) that you are loved …
    It’s not deciding in your (Mind), I deserve to be loved …
    Or manipulating your (Heart) to feel loved.
    It’s settling in your (Soul), I was created by God who formed me…
    “Love the Lord your God with all your strength heart mind and soul…

    Reply
    • P.Selvaraj

      The verse says it all!

      Reply
  3. P.Selvaraj

    Just reject the rejection,okay?

    Reply
  4. Bomi

    Thank you so very much for taking the time to share this – what a blessing!! Love the perspectives:)! Very helpful.

    Reply
  5. Caryn Candia

    Oh my! This sounds like the exact same emotionally-charged conversation I had with my oh so wise husband about a year ago. Thank God for husbands who keep us grounded, and thank YOU for the practical steps to not hold people accountable for things they did not say or mean.

    Reply
  6. Melanie Redd

    Good Morning, Lysa!

    Over the past few weeks, I’ve been praying about a way that I could encourage other bloggers who have been encouraging me. Through your ministry, posts, words, comments, and faithfulness—your life has been a blessing to mine, and I wanted others to know about you!

    So, I compiled a list of those bloggers who I’ve personally found to be the MOST INSPIRATIONAL on the web.

    You are ONE Of these bloggers – in my estimation!

    You can find the link to the list where you are featured here: http://www.melanieredd.com/the-100-most-inspiring-christian-blogs-on-the-web/

    I’ve also signed up to get your emails, and tried to follow you on your social media outlets!

    I pray that God will encourage you today through these simple acts~
    Melanie

    Reply
Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Let's Stay In Touch