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The Day My Insecurities Didn’t Win

May 17, 2013

Last weekend I spoke at my favorite church in the world: Elevation Church

Elevation Church is home to me. And since it’s home, I always feel incredibly honored to speak there. And incredibly nervous. There is just a different kind of weight I feel in my heart when speaking at home. I can’t really explain it.

But here’s what I know for sure. God speaks most clearly to our situation when we feel desperation.

Desperation causes me to press into God in a deeper, more urgent kind of way. Probably the way I should pursue Him every day. But many of my every days don’t find me desperate.

Sadly, I get quite comfortable at times. And I can be forgetful about just how much I need God.

But writing this message definitely reminded me. I found myself in some hard spots leading up to Mother’s Day this year. Really hard. And I finally realized the person that would need this message most in the whole world was me.

Me. The girl that was supposed to walk up on that stage when all I really wanted to do was crawl back in bed.

But God has surrounded me with wise people. People I called. People who let me stand on their wisdom when I didn’t feel I could stand on my own. People who wouldn’t let me let Satan win.

Thank you to those people. You know who you are. And I pray you know how much I love you with every fiber of my shaky little heart.

So, with all that being said… here’s my message. The one I wrote. The one I delivered at my home church on Mother’s Day 2013. The message that the messenger needed most of all.

Click here to watch my message.

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46 Comments
  1. Esther

    Thank you for this!
    My daughter is in a bad place, and I need to be the one standing alongside her, helping her, and encouraging her.

    Reply
  2. Julie W

    You know how every once in a while something just really hits you? This sentence did me: . People who let me stand on their wisdom when I didn’t feel I could stand on my own. This is powerful. Very powerful. Thank you!

    Reply
  3. Lynn Cowell

    Not only worth listening to once; but twice!

    Reply
    • Cheri Gregory

      Lynn —

      Giving a big “amen” to that! I watched this morning, and I’m back at it again right now with my pen and paper for notes.

      JUST what I needed to hear today/this season…for SO many reasons!

      Reply
  4. deb

    We love you Lysa! It was great hearing you Sunday at out HOME church! You make me feel so “normal”. My egroup here at elevation just got done with your study UNGLUED and all 12 if us were deeply changed by it! Its so good we might do it AGAIN in the future to have some of the material repeated to stick even more! We loves the setting of Italy so much we did a big Italiano dinner the last night of the study to top it off right! We are blessed to have you as a apart of our Elevation family!!!

    Reply
  5. PAM SCHAEFFER

    Lysa,
    I just listened to your message. Wow! Thank you so much. For years, I have been chained to insecurities determining my identity. You have reminded me to truly believe God’s Word and Cut the But and believe that I’m a child of God, Therefore…
    all things are possible. You have blessed me personally with your message, Proverbs 31 devotionals, and your “Unglued” book. Thank you for allowing God to use you to bless others. Praying God will continue to bless you and give you strength in raising your family and ministering to many.

    Reply
  6. Sara Kobe

    Lysa,

    Wow, what a great message. To remind all women to not listen to the fickle voices of others or to determine our worth through our children was amazing. Your message hit home with me and this is a message I need to hear often. You are an inspiration and I thank God that He is using you to spread his word.

    Reply
  7. Melissa

    Thank you for walking up on that stage even when all you really wanted was just to crawl back in bed. There was a point in your speaking when it seemed you made a point to look directly at the camera…I believe it was during your talk on Jeremiah 29:11….it was as if you were sitting in my living room, speaking right into my situation at that very moment. Amazing the way God gives us His message when we are open to it. Thank you for being His voice for that message I needed this week.

    Reply
  8. Dana

    Man, did I need to hear that message. Thank you SO much for being real and being obedient to God. I relate to you in SO many ways and needed the wisdom you shared. Thank you for pulling me out of my bed and helping me stand again, confident that I am a CHILD OF GOD! Period!

    Reply
  9. Ruby

    Lysa, I really enjoyed watching your message. It was very inspiring, and made me think. It was nice how you put personal stuff in it to give your testimony. I think it’s so amazing how God uses people, and we each have amazing stories of God speaking to our hearts. God bless you.

    Reply
  10. Betsy S.

    Lysa- I also call Elevation home! When I ‘heard through the grapevine’ you were our Mother’s Day speaker/preacher, I was elated. My 2 sons refer to you as my ‘spiritual best friend’ (because I share most weeks how your messages, books, or devotions touch me)! I tuned in Saturday night to watch on-line, then was in the Providence House (that’s my family’s campus since day 1) Sunday morning. You spoke from the heart, honestly, eloquently and always have the right word from God and encouragement so many of us need! Thank you for speaking boldly to our generation. Please know you have “Jesus Girls’ backing you up in prayer! Now I might just enjoy your message again. 🙂

    Reply
  11. Karen O

    Thank you so much Lysa for sharing your heart with us. God’s Word through you is so inspiring and sets my spirit free. Love from another mama 🙂

    Reply
  12. Katy

    Thank you for sharing in such a raw & genuine way. Totally guilty! I am so grateful for your reminders. Just what I needed to get up off my own closet floor and have peace about my own son’s story.

    Reply
  13. Jill Beran

    Lysa, thank you, thank you for sharing this and blessing all of us along with your Elevation friends! Truly it was a reminder I needed today as I navigate life with my 5 blessings!! Awhile back I walked thru one of those messes with my kids and could hear you saying, “Don’t build the solidity of your identity on the fragility of your children’s choices!” Such truth, but like you say something we need to be reminded of.

    On a side note my daughter’s sat with me at our sticky farm table listening…what a joy to know they are hearing truth at a young age!! Praying for the seeds that were planted in our house today and for all those who listen in.

    BLessings to you!

    Reply
  14. sue

    Lysa,
    We watch Elevation online weekly and I heard you speak this past week online. So awesome and needed! Thank you for your transparency. The 3 things you have struggled with are my top 3 too! I definitely needed to hear this so thank you for pressing through! Please keep speaking the truth, keep being transparent, even when the enemy tries to overwhelm you with his lies! Sue

    Reply
  15. Stephanie Fessel

    The perfect message at the right time for me. Lysa always has a way of speaking hope in to this girl’s desperate situations.

    Reply
  16. Michelle Welch

    I had made the decision to leave my women’s Bible study group because of some unkind comments on my request for prayers in my lack of faith. Between some well placed scriptures and your devotion landing in my spam box so that I noticed it instead of just rushing past it in the course of my day, I knew that God was reminding me that we need each other, more now than ever. Love your message. And heading back to my Bible study group this week!

    Reply
  17. Jewell Massey

    Lisa, Myself and my daughter and her two children – boy age 15 and daughter 20, the daughter is pregnant and will be my 1st great grandchild, was at Elevation last Sun. I attend First Assembly Church, Concord and my family has been visiting Elevation. Please know that God gave you the perfect message for me and my family. Many trials we are going through at the present time. God’s words spoken through you for us were “sever the chains” – “Insecurities” “faulty voices of the past” “fragile choices” “fickle opinions of others, and of course your starting point “our identity”. Yes, all this sounds like simple statement and yes, God planted us there on this very Sunday to hear what He had planted in your heart. Thank you for your obedience.

    Reply
  18. Robin

    Love you Lysa. It was not until I read your book Unglued that I realized you went to Elevation. I watch this church service on line all the time. You can not imagine my surprise to hear you speak! I text my friends and forwarded a link for them to listen. Your message was incredible and timely. God is so good and thank you for allowing him to use yourself to help all of here.

    Reply
  19. Tonya McCoy

    Lysa, I just listened to your message & it was awesome! Very powerful! It truly spoke to my heart. I’ve been studying this week about using scripture when praying & just quoting it over my life. Your message just fueled my weapon for warfare even more! You are such an inspiration to me Lysa!

    Reply
  20. Amy King

    Love…love…love this message! The best part…I discerned while watching it that God was also doing a mighty work I. You! You spoke from a deeper place in your heart! This ministered to me so much….I posted it on my blog too!

    Reply
  21. Jen

    Wonderful message! Thank you.

    Reply
  22. Robin

    Lysa, Thanks so much for sharing this! As always, I loved what you had to say, because it is so rooted in Scripture, and so applicable! So encouraging! You are a blessing to me constantly! I’ve done studies on your books and am currently doing the Unglued devotional and have shared parts of it for devotions at work. I appreciate your honesty and humility! Love and blessings to you! Philemon 1:4-5

    Reply
  23. Bridget

    Dear Lysa,

    Just watched your sermon. Thank you for your honesty and your passion. I too have five children, two of them step children. My husband passed away 12 years ago at 38 and then two years later I got remarried and gained a new husband and two children. It is hard to see some of them make poor choices and stand by and let them do it. I pray for their hearts, that they would desperately seek God and realize the need for Him in their life. It is hard to not worry but I pray each day, and God gives me peace, and then I need to pray again the next day. It was good to be reminded that through humility comes wisdom. Thanks you for your vulnerability and your wisdom.

    Reply
  24. Wendy

    Lysa,
    Wow! What a fantastic and appropriate message. The only thing better would to have actually been there!

    I need to “cut the but”! It has been so hard not to tie to my insecurities of my past. I have enjoyed your books as well. Thank you for sharing your love of God with me!

    Reply
  25. Debra

    So great. 2011 was a year that the rug of all my pride (although I didn’t know it at the time) was pulled out from under me & it took a year of me seeking what God was teaching me to realize it & the beginning of much need humility that He continues to work on in my heart. Sent this message on to a lot of moms. God is speaking through you. I give praise & thanks for that!

    Reply
  26. Amanda

    Lysa,

    I am not a mother yet. My husband and I so desperately want children of our own and have hit struggles with it. This message was what I needed to hear. Not necessarily in relation to wanting to be a mother, but just hearing someone say that the chains of insecurity are there and we need to cut them out. I definitely need to “cut the but” and move forward. Thank you for sharing your love of God with me!

    Reply
  27. Jennifer

    Wonderful message! I needed this, bookmarking, and sharing with others. Thank you!

    Reply
  28. Tonja Herbel

    A very good and powerful word sister. I am glad I got to hear it. It was right on time. Loved it. You are a very blessed woman of God.

    Reply
  29. Chelsea

    Great Message!
    I had a question for you…I’m reading “What Happens When Young Women Say Yes to God” and I’m at the part where you talked about giving a copy of a song by a Christian singer after your ASAP meeting. I was just wondering what song that was? I would love to listen to it! Thanks! 🙂

    Reply
  30. Brenda

    Hi Lysa! I really enjoy all of your books – you have helped me understand God’s word and apply it in today’s world. I have an issue I was hoping you could help me with. My son is 22 years old and lives at home with my husband and I. He tried college and decided it wasn’t for him, so he now works at our local walmart. I am worried about him for several reasons. He believes in God, but he no longer goes to church. Also, with no college education, I am afraid he will have a hard time finding a good job. He says he is happy at Walmart, but I feel myself disappointed and kind of embarassed when other mothers arebragging about their kids jobs, and my son works minimum wage. I feel so horrible that I feel this way, and i am trying to give it to God as I know he loves Eric, but lately it has been constantly on my mind. youhave such good ideas with your children; is it too late for my son? PLEASE help me… .

    Reply
  31. Pam

    That, my dear Lysa, was a powerful word! I’m so glad you didn’t crawl back into bed instead : )

    Reply
  32. Irene

    Dear Lysa,

    Thank you so much for your words!
    You are so real and that is so important when you are delivering a powerful message that p many of us need to hear.

    Thank you and May God continue to allow you to bless in this area!
    Amen

    Reply
  33. Denise

    Hi Lysa,
    I just wanted to thank you for coming to the “Fabulous” womens conference. It was a wonderful event and I just could not believe that you were coming. I appreciated your taking the time to talk with us. I also am a big fan of Downton Abbey. We are watching it at work on our lunch breaks. We always have to stop it early because of time and anxiously await our next gathering to move a little more into the series. We watch 2 times a week now. We are getting ready to start series 3. One of the ladies received series 3 for Mother’s Day. I read your blog for inspiration and just look forward to the little reminders to keep relying on God to help us through the rough spots.
    Thanks again…
    Denise from Toledo

    Reply
  34. freida hall

    Beautiful message – hits close to home, thank you for sharing.

    Reply
  35. LorettaPearson

    That was a good message Lysa!

    Reply
  36. Kelly Collins

    Hi Lysa! I just wanted to let you know that you are such an amazing woman and a true inspiration! I was looking for some reading material on Amazon today an I came across “Capture His Heart”, “What Happens When Women Say Yes to God”, “Feminine Appeal” and “Unglued”. I really hope to purchase these books soon as I know they will be available to me. I know you are busy but it woukd be an honor if you would be a guest blogger for me one day! God bless!

    http://www.bestofbothworldsnc.tumblr.com

    Reply
  37. Lynne

    Lysa,
    I also enjoy listening to you speak. However, I had a question, when you spoke at your church were you the main speaker/preacher on Sunday morning?
    Lynne

    Reply
  38. Elaine W.

    WOW!!!!!!! Lysa, that message was awesome! Thank you so much for your honesty and courage to tell your story and how God has brought you through it. I can identify so much with you that it’s a little scary to find out there is someone else that knows exactly what I’m going through. May God bless you as you “keep it real” for all of us to learn and grow through His word.

    Reply
  39. Carla Stewart

    This message was such a blessing to me. I admit that I have been recently wrapped up in the fragile choices of my five children and have had the bed/tear experience more times than I can articulate. Thank you for sharing this word! You helped to set my spirit at ease!

    Reply
  40. Laura

    Thank you for this honest and powerful teaching. I can relate to your “top 3” and have found it very useful and practical to begin changing the way I talk to myself. Changing the ‘but’ to “therefore” is transforming my mind. Your transparency and vulnerability allows God to speak powerfully through you. You hit it square when you spoke about how often our disgrace over children’s decisions can be traced back to pride in us. Ouch, but much needed – your insight brought ME to repentance. What a difference it makes when we repent and draw back to God. May you blessed in your ministry to others as you hold out the word of truth.

    Reply
  41. Cindy

    Here I am up at 3:00 a.m., it seems God loves to get ahold me at this hour for some reason. I get up turn on the television, watch som news nd I hear this small voice in my head say, ” What about me?” I knew exactly who was talking. I pick up my ipad and go straight to Proverbs 31 Ministries. I read yesterday’s devotion and decide to scroll through some past devotions. The word “insecurities” pops out like the biggest word on the page, why? The evening before a woman from my church comes to me and says, every time she thinks she can’t get through her day with all her children, she says “If Cindy can do I so can I.” I thought to myself, oh if she only knew. I thought, m I a fake that give the perception that I am “a good mom,” hen I feel like I am failing miserably. I could so relate to your message on so many levels. I am a homeschool mom of four, three still at home, on is twenty-one and married now. But I tend to define who I am and what good/bad Mom and wife I am by the actions of my children nd husband. I distance myself from people fo fear of judgement. I know this early hour was a God Moment becaus He knew just what I needed for this season in my life. Thank you for your timely word an for your openness to share your life.

    Reply
    • Cindy

      Wow, re-reading my post, so many misspelled words. Yikes and yes I have homeschooled for 16 years. Lol

      Reply
  42. Ingrid G

    Lysa, The message you spoke at Elevation was so powerful. My husband and I are in the middle of a crazy move to another state. When things get too overwhelming, we repeat to each other the points from your message- show up, lace up your shoes, hold onto the pole and listen to your coach. God used you to give us peace during a crazy time in our life. Thanks

    Reply
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