They were laughing in their matching neon pink t-shirts with the words “Bethany’s Birthday Girls” printed on the front. They were going bowling after school. Then to get pizza. Then a sleep over.
When Bethany passed out the shirts by her locker that morning I pretended to be too busy to notice. I stayed hyper focused on unpacking my book bag into my locker. And then I hurried off to my first class.
It was clear. Bethany had made a list of her friends and I hadn’t been included.
I thought I would be. We’d gotten together before. I’d invited her to my pool party.
No big deal, I tried to tell myself all day. I had plans that night too.
To sit at home. Alone. And wonder why I hadn’t been chosen.
It’s been years since I watched those neon pink shirts all pile into a station wagon after school and drive away.
But it hasn’t been years since I’ve heard the negative inside chatter that ensued afterwards.
“You’re not liked.”
“You weren’t invited.”
“You weren’t chosen.”
Here’s what I wish I could have told my little sans pink t-shirt self back then…And what I need to remember when those same feelings creep in today…
Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.
Not getting a pink t-shirt that day felt like a defining moment. And maybe it was for that day. I wasn’t invited to Bethany’s party. And that stunk.
But it wasn’t a defining moment of my identity.
It was a moment. And moments shift. People are fickle. People shift.
In the moment Bethany made the list of who to invite to her party, I wasn’t on the top of her mind. Not because she didn’t like me, but simply because she hadn’t thought about it.
It was a small situation.
And I can’t put the whole of my identity into the smallness of this situation. Or any other for that matter.
My Pastor used a verse in his sermon this week that echoes these same thoughts, “For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, AND YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST,” (Colossians 2: 9-10).
I have been given fullness.
I can place the wholeness of my identity in that reality… and see everything else as small in comparison.
I want to invite you to join Women of Faith’s Sheila Walsh and me tomorrow, January 29th, at 9:00 p.m. EST for a FREE webcast on how to combat negative inside chatter.
You can sign up to receive a reminder about the webcast by clicking here. We would love to have you with us!
And there are prizes!!! We’ll be giving away 2 adorable, tiffany blue Women of Faith bags packed full of all kinds of goodies during the webcast.
– a copy of Unglued
– a copy of the Unglued Devotional
– God Loves Broken People by Sheila Walsh
– Stumble Into Grace by Lisa Harper
– What Women Fear by Angie Smith
– Pink Women of Faith T-Shirt
– Necklace and bracelet
– Women of Faith bag
All you have to do to enter is leave a comment on this post stating what you’ve learned about “Inside Chatter” in your life! We’ll be discussing your insights and announcing the winner tomorrow night on the webcast, so go on and get to commenting 🙂
For this party, everyone is invited!
I have learned so much from unglued . I could not put the book down . My inside chatter was excessive and never stopped … It would change motive and direction… But was clearly always there . At times untold myself this motivated me to do better , try harder . However I now realize listening to this chatter , halted me from becoming the woman I am meant to be through Christ . I was so focused on making myself better , that I didn’t live who I was . I thought I did , but I wasn’t accepting me for who He made me to be .
Inside chatter is NEVER helpful to me, as it most always seems to be negative. Now as a mother of two precious girls I want to learn some tools to help myself and them turn that negative chatter off! I want them to feel empowered, and not defeated. My wish for them is to be confident young ladies who know God loves them. I do not want them to struggle for years like I did. I am excited for tomorrow night and all that may be revealed to me.
Inside Chatter: This has bombarded me my entire life and up until a couple of weeks ago, I just though I wasn’t good enough. However, I spoke to someone about these feelings staying with me 24/7 and realized the TRUTH! My God is GOOD Enough.
Thanks and I can hardly wait for tomorrow evening.
What have I learned about “Inside Chatter”? It can ruin my Outside Talk. When the voices are running their lips inside my head, oftentimes, they are making mountains out of molehills and connecting dots that are not even on the same page! It is just that – chatter that clogs up the God-inspired thought process. Because it is ME-inspired. So, when I find my mind turning the innocent episode into a matter of national security, I remembert this – I can chose to believe that I am created by God, and if my thoughts are not running down a path that lines up with who He says I am, it is time to stop to chatter in my head.
I’ve learned from inside chatter that I can’t place true CHRIST-LIKE merit on what other’s around me say or think of me.
I am wonderfully made.
I am beautiful inside & out.
I am created in HIS IMAGE.
I am worthy.
It is amazing the things we work in to our minds. And it is also important to realize how things we do impact others. I am so happy that God has me on his invitation list no matter what I do or have done! I hope to be able to participate in your webcast tomorrow. My daughter turns 13 tomorrow. Thanks for drawing us closer to him!
My “inside chatter” was almost always negative and it effected many areas of my life. I often allowed it to change my mood and attitude. Sometimes I have been so focused of the “inside chatter” rather than standing of the promises of the Lord. I will no longer let it control my thoughts. Just because a negative thought pops into your mind doesn’t mean you have to believe it!
Can’t wait for the broadcast. Plan to have my 15 year old daughter join me!
I don’t want her to have the same experiences with negative chatter that I have battled all of my life!
I have learned to interrupt my inside negative chatter and remind myself that I am a child of God. A chosen one yet still imperfect. I will fail at times but I have found to give myself and others grace in those situations. None of us are perfect but we learn from our mistakes and I thank Jesus for loving me regardless.
I’ve learned to RECOGNIZE when I’m having negative inside chatter…that was a huge step! Then to be able to stop those thoughts in their tracks and PRAY about the situation!
Looking forward to the webcast!!!
“Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.” – BOOM!!! That hurt…in such a good way!!! I have learned that if the “inside chatter” is not Philipians 4:8 than it is taking up unwanted and uninvited space in my head and heart and it needs to gets the steppin’ 🙂 !!!! Easier said than done, but I know that all I have to do is cry out to our Father and His Spirit will remove chatter and replenish with wholesomeness. 🙂
Can’t wait for tomorrow night!! I appreciate you ladies!!!
I have a lot of inside chatter, and most the time it seems to be negative. Really need to deal with this the right way.Thx
So glad to be getting these daily in my email. Loving the words about negative chatter. It is so easy to fall into that trap and I need the encouragement.
Internal chatter is a daily battle for me and I struggle daily. I have learned that I have to cast down as soon as it comes jnto my head or my battle is even harder.
I have read your Unglued book and now I am going through it again and taking notes. Inside chatter is a constant battle and I need the proper weapons to fight against it. Thank you, Lysa for helping me find them! Thank you for your post today – needed it. 🙂
I’ve learned that inside chatter can be overcome by God’s promises…when I remember them!
This Unglued book has come at a perfect time in my life when I need it most. With 3 children 8 and under, I tend to get unglued a bit too often. When I mess up, those labels and identities come creeping in my mind. But then I remember…imperfect progress!! I’ve got this. We can’t let the negative thought rule us but continue to renew our mind daily! I’d love to win this gift set! :)))
It was a moment. Moments shift. People are fickle. I so needed to hear these words today. I was listening to my inside chatter and those 3 little sentences changed my thinking. I am chosen. I am chosen by God. God defines me, not my circumstances nor others. Thank you for the reminder Lysa! God bless you!
Inside chatter tends to make a joyful day and turn it into something depressing and full of dread. Its good to be reminded that we do have fulness in Christ.
I have learned to focus on the ” whatever is True”. Even though the feelings of not measuring up may be there, I can rest in the knowledge that I am a daughter of the King and He loves me!
Negative inside chatter = Negative outside behavior. The cure? Jesus is helping me take baby steps practicing taking every thought captive and if it doesn’t line up with what I know God’s Word says then it is time to do battle and clean house – or mind in this case. Imperect progress but progress, nonetheless.
Wow Lysa! That was exactly me in high school – the girl always left out. It defined me for a long time, and still does at times. When that inside chatter starts up, my only option is prayer. I have tried positive self talk, but I negative self talk much better! The ONLY thing that stops it for me is talking to God.
I have learned that even when I recognize the negativity of “inside chatter” I can neither drown it out nor eliminate it ON MY OWN! Give me some Jesus help!
I haven’t started reading unglued yet – hope to start this week. I am looking forward to the web cast tomorrow night!
I just discussed this very topic last night with 4 sophomore girls during our small group time! There are so many battles that are going on in our thought life! And our thoughts influence our actions and beliefs. I challenged them (and myself) to think “great thoughts,” and to “take captive every thought that is not TRUTH and make it obedient to Christ.”
Amen Katrina! What a blessing to be talking to girls your age and encouraging them in God’s truth! YOU, by the grace of God, are going to make an impact for life in the outlook and ‘inlook’ of your friends! God bless you!!
I’m trying to recognize when the inside chatter starts and then put scriptures of WHO I am in the place. I AM fearfully and wonderfully made, I AM the righteousness of God through Christ. I AM dearly loved instead of the chatter that trys to tell me the opposite. Sweet Blessings.
I’ve learned that making assumptions is a form of lying. Now I try to combat the insecure chatter in my head by reminding myself to think only what I know to be absolutely true (ph4:8)
I defintely have/had the inside chatter going on in me and I have learned to cancel it out with promises from God’s Word. I am choosing to believe who I am in Christ and who Christ is in me. As I read your blog today the tears ran down my cheeks not so much for me but it was as if you were writing about my daughter. She is going through the same things at school with friends and not being invited to parties and different things that are being said to her and about her. I love all the truths you shared and I will be sharing them with her. This is so encouraging and I am so looking forward to the webcast tomorrow. 🙂
Inside chatter will destroy you. The enemy is always lurking and wants to harm us. I try to counteract every negative thought with a truth from The Lord. Over time, I am developing a habit of this. I will always have to work at it but at least it is a start. We are daughters of the King. What could be more wonderful than that? God bless!
This is a biggie for me right now. I have always been confident and secure, able to ignore the chatter, but being separated from my husband for 4 months now, its become a struggle. Hearing him say I’m a great wife but not the right wife for him has amplified those thoughts. I know in my head what is true but my heart feels otherwise.
Wow! The first few sentences read like diary entries from my childhood. The line “Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.” is such a powerful line. I will be sharing that with my ministry team. How often in our lives do we do that very thing. Thank you for being real and inspiring women like myself to open up and share their life experiences. God is good. I can’t wait to hear what you share this evening. Much love from 30,000 feet on my way home to Texas from Florida. Your blog today opened my heart to a reminder that my inside voice can sometimes be my worst enemy!
I never really realized how bad my inside chatter was until I read unglued. I never realized how it could fuel my anxiety or depression. I also couldn’t see how my inside chatter affected my outside as well. As I have begun to reign it in, I have seen multiple changes happen. Not only do I feel more open and receptive to what God is trying to tell me but I feel like there is finally space to be able to just think more clearly. To see things in a new way. To be able to see past the hurt or stress or worry and just remain in Gods loving grace through it. I now what my procedure manual for keeping my thoughts in check and I love it!!! Lysa I cannot thank you enough for being so honest in your book and in the ministries you do. You inspire me to continue growing in my relationship with Christ. I have hope for a prosperous future thanks to God and how he has used you and Proverbs31 ministries to reach others. Thank you.
Can’t wait to join the webinar !!
My negative inside chatter was non-stop. It would drag me down so far that I never thought I could get back up. Unglued has helped me be more aware of the inside chatter so I can stop it and say, “that is not me!” I know who I am in Christ Jesus.
I’ve learned I need to learn alot more! I’m starting Unglued bible study at church today for the first time.
I definately have to much inside chatter. How can anyone love me when my own mother doesn’t. I can’t expect love from my husband because I’m unloveable. My husband treats me the same way my family of origin treated me because I deserve to be treated that way.
I look forward to the broadcast! I need to remind myself daily the effects of negative chatter when not it in perspective.
I have learned that we are all loved by Christ. Inside chatter hurts others even though you or others might not realize. Sometimes I feel like that little girl that was not invited to the first boy-girl party that my cousin was having. I need to remember how others feel when they are not included. Satan loves to see division in the church and we need to stop that quickly
God taught me a great deal on this very subject last year! Taking every thought captive & making it obedient to him has been my daily goal. Trying to only think on what is pure, lovely, & true….and many times I’ve had to force myself to come up with something that fits that description! But, I am a living testimony that when we trust him & take him at his word, he will take care of all the details!! Thank you Lysa, for your post & for being so real.
Inside chatter is not a bad thing. IF it’s positive and based on God’s Word it will motivate, encourage, and strengthen. But if it’s based on the devil’s lies, it’ll sink your day in a second!!!!
I have learned that inside chatter is destructive. It’s kept me from true joy that comes from Him. It keeps me having a lack of faith and trust in the One that truly matters. I am constantly replaying hurtful conversations certain people in my life have had with me and it’s never productive. These people who have hurt me don’t think twice about it but I’ve allowed it to fester. I’m thankful that I can go to a Heavenly Father and ask for his wisdom and guidance. It’s a daily giving up of self…and I’m determined to not give up on become healthier in my mind for Him! He has so much more for me than this. Thank you for your passion and ministry!
I so appreciate this blog post today, not only for myself but also for my 6th grade (and 2nd grade) daughter, who has already experienced the same inner chatter, the same hunger to be liked, to be included, to be told and shown she is valuable and loved. I remember the pain I felt as a young girl but I also still struggle with those voices (really that voice of the enemy) sometimes, taunting me that I am not measuring up, I was left out, I am failing my family, I am failing God. My solace and my sanity is the “Voice of Truth” (love that song!) telling me I am His and He’s in control, not me. My great challenge and my Geary’s desire is to raise me daughters to hear and follow the voice of truth, and to reach out in love to others who are awkward, left out, hurting, and so precious and valuable to Jesus!
Catching neg thots when they’re little before they take root & establish themselves as permanent friends is helpful. Resisting the devil’s lies at the start helps me stand firm when my emotions are being pulled on in that ugly direction….
You know I’m 56 yrs young and I still have that inside chatter, mostly negative. I have to constantly stay in tune with my Heavenly Father in order to make this inside chatter “positive”. Can’t wait for the webcast!
I have learned a lot about inside chatter. This is one of my biggest issues, especially right now. It is so easy to get wrapped up in the lies of the enemy because he never stops trying. No matter what is going on in your life, the thoughts of, “I’m not enough,” or “she’s better than me.” Are always there. He’s not creative with his lies, I mean…he always uses the same ones with me. The thing he is picking at right now is that my boyfriend doesn’t value me. My boyfriend is an INCREDIBLE leader at LifeChurch.tv at the Stillwater campus, and he ADORES me. Even though I know in my head that he loves me, satan does everything he can to make me feel less important and unloved compared to his ministry. It is a battlefield of the mind to speak against lies that satan is saying, but we are given victory in Christ, and that’s what I try to focus on. It’s not always easy, and I know I still have a TON to learn about the battles of the mind. Every single day I learn more and more about my incredible loving savior, and those are the things that allow me to fight back 🙂
I am trying to silence the negative inside chatter. It can be so loud, and disguised as my own voice when those things are really coming from the enemy. I need to learn to recognize those thoughts when they come my way, and resist them. Lord help me.
I have learned that, for me, this will be a lifelong battle but I am not alone and memorizing God’s Promises to repeat to myself when those negative thoughts creep in is Crucial!!
What I’ve learned about my inside chatter is that it’s not usually from God. He wants me to feel like the loved and cared child of God that I am. Not that I feel that way too often.
What helps me is telling myself– Be still and know that I am God… Or other scriptures I have in my heart, but that one seems to quiet my crazies the best.
I’m reading Unglued for the second time, and boy, do I need it!! I realized that the Inside Chatter is the part that affects me most, especially at work, where in my own mind, people are thinking things about me that they aren’t in reality thinking. Why do we care so much what other people think when we have our FULL IDENTITY in Christ?! Thanks for driving that point home in the book, and hopefully, this second time around, it will stick!!
This was so good for me. I have read Unglued and am now going through a bible study called Soul Detox. I also read Battlefield of the Mind Devotional daily. I still am struggling with depression, but feel all of these are helping. I am doing my best to stay focused on God and His word and keep those negative thoughts out. I love your posts and am so encouraged.
I only want to try and not be the one who leaves others out, so pray everyday that I listen to His voice! WAITING for web cast tomorrow night! God be with all.
That I am wonderfully made.I am beautiful inside & out.I am created in HIS IMAGE.
I am worthy and no matter what others say about me or try to bring me down. GOD LOVES ME.
My brain seems to go into overdrive when it comes to the chatter that I “think” goes on around me. As a wife of a minister I feel that people analyze my motives or reasons for what I do or don’t do without really knowing me. It can really drive a girl nuts! At the end of the day I must be confident in knowing that pleasing and honoring my Lord and Savior is all that matters. While I know that others are watching me, and I do want to be a leader and example, I don’t answer to what their expectations are of me but instead I follow what Jesus wants me to do.
It’s amazing how longterm the effects of that inside chatter can have…I still find myself playing back those mental tapes from my youth…those times when I was rejected, not chosen, etc…but am reminded again in your words today that those do not define me. My worth, my ‘voice of truth’ is what God says about me. He says that I am made in His image and He loved me enough to die for me. That makes me someone of worth.
I have learned that “inside chatter” can do an enormous amount of damage to my self-esteem if I don’t fight back with God’s truth!
“Be Still and know that I am God.”
I have learned to replace negative “inside chatter” with positive words from the Lord
Oh gosh. . You just described my life. I feel sooo unaccepted at church. .. and the fact that I homeschool my kiddos already puts me in that “different” category. I feel that I can’t dress right, say the right things, or make the right decisions. I’m actually even reluctant to say how I feel about a lot of the things and judgemental attitudes that go on at my church for fear that someone else might be reading it from the same group. I am learning and seeing though, and boy is it freeing, that who I have to answer to is the Lord. They will never accept me unless I am just as they think I should be and have all the same opinions as they do.
Inside chatter only has as much power over me as I give it. I try to spend more time in God’s word to help me deal with the inside chatter and to put it where it belongs…
I have learned that “inside chatter” is something that brings me down. I have to learn to let it go and replace it with positive thoughts. Also, it helps to just be silent and be still and let God settle and erase the inside chatter. Resting in Him allows the weariness of the inside chatter to fade away.
It is still a learning process for me. I am learning to hear the voice of my Savior who loves me. Fear is not from Him!
Your words always seem to resonate with what I’m dealing with at that moment. Thank you for giving a new perspective to look at the things that seemed to repeatedly trip me up. I’m slowly learning to PRAY instead of reacting as if the situation means everything.
Can’t wait to hear this broadcast! I battle the negative chatter everyday but praise God for His voice of truth that says “this is my daughter and she is perfectly and wonderfully made”. I am so thankful that when the whispers of lies start creeping in I can get on my knees and be reminded of the true worth I have in the eyes of my savior…and His vision is never blurred! 🙂
About a year ago I started to pray to God to help me get rid of the negative chatter. It’s worked every single time! I’ve learned so much in one year and I’m still learning. I’m glad that God has been able to help other people too!
Inside chatter is often completely opposite of the Truth of God’s Word. It takes intentional effort to line it up with the Truth of the Bible.
I am new to “Unglued” and cannot wait to experience it. I can already see that “inside chatter” is always on our side. I worry about how my “inside chatter” effects my parenting and my relationships. I making myself a date for the webcast.
this is so timely for me! excited to learn ways to be constructive about this negative behavior! thank you!
I can’t wait to share your blog post with my 12 year old daughter after school today. My prayer is that she will resist the temptation to find her identity in the smallness of the many situations she faces in Middle School. I want her identity to be centered in Christ. She is defined by HIM.
Isn’t it amazing that we talk to ourselves in ways we’d never dream of talking to others? This has been an awakening to me. Now I tell myself…”Ellen, if your friend was saying these things about herself…what would you tell her?”. God thinks I’m more than good enough!
“I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;[a] Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well” (Psalms 139:14 NKJV)
I have learned that “inside chatter” is more often times than not fueled by my emotions. God has been teaching me lately that my emotions are fickle, and they do not always represent Christ. God says that I am beautifully and wonderfully made in His image (paraphrasing, of course). To say that I am not wanted, loved, chosen, good enough, or any other thing is to deny Christ Himself. He has called me, He has chosen me, and He has deemed me good enough to any task He calls me too. I’ve learned to speak those scriptures over myself when “inside chatter” tries to tell me lies! <3
Negative chatter – it is a constant and incessant battle inside my head. Inside all our heads really. But I have a weapon ~ an Almighty and All Powerful weapon!!
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2Cor10:5
I CHOOSE Jesus – His Truth. His Promise. His Grace I cling to Him and reject each and every voice and thought as it bullies its way to the front of my conscious. I reject the lie and choose The Truth. Sometimes all I am able to muster is a whispered, desperate “Jesus help me”…but it is enough.
When I read Unglued I feel like the book is written for me! I have had so much negative chatter in my head since I was a young girl. It has affected many relationships and friendships for so so many years. With the help of Unglued, I am finally learning how to handle my emotions.
Inside chatter can be so destructive. Growing up, I was very much loved by my family and never felt like I was “less than” anyone else. Until middle school. Oh goodness, how I hated middle school. And I went to a Christian school where the cliques were already formed and new kids weren’t invited to join. That’s when I started wondering what was wrong with me. Why couldn’t I be a part of a group? Had I done something wrong and not realized it? I never got those answers and went all through middle and high school feeling that way. By the time I got to college, I didn’t care. I finally realized God made me, God loved me, and I was exactly who he wanted me to be and I wasn’t the one with the problem. And yet, I can’t deny, sometimes, when I’m around certain people, other authors, speakers, musicians, etc, and I get “looked over”, that little voice wants to come back and take a dig with, “What’s wrong with me? Why am I all of a sudden invisible?” Looking forward to the webcast. 🙂
Much too much of mine is NEGATIVE. I’m trying to recognize it and turn this over to Jesus, but it’s often hard.
I’ve learned that negative inside chatter makes me feel insecure…when I feel most threatened by satan’s attacks on my family…like sheep, I look to my Shepherd, Jesus Christ, to protect us–to keep the 99 and to go after the one that is lost–according to His sovereign plan, and His will, as I allow Him to put me on His shoulders to rest….thanking Him for how He is working in mylife and my family’s lives…like the Shepherd’s little sheep in the 23rd Psalm, I see myself and my family lying down in green pastures beside the still waters…He is protecting me, He has my back, and my family’s back, His plans will not be thwarted…and I hear God saying…”Trust me…I’ve got this!”
“Inside chatter” can stir up so many un-Godly emotions. I’m trying to combat my inside chatter with God’s Word and teach my 14 & 16 year old girls to do the same. It’s not easy but with God all things are possible. Looking forward to the webcast.
What have I learned in my life about inside chatter? I have learned that it will ruin precious moments, it will take over days, and most of all that it will get to even the very best of all of us if we let it. I have also learned that if we make the conscious decision to listen to the still small voice of our Lord and Savior, then the chatter has no other option except to back down and go back where it came from. Our peace in Jesus Christ is one of the greatest gifts we receive from our Father, and it is there for the taking at all times if we choose to. Everything, inside and out, comes down to the constant obedience of our Heavenly Father.
We really must learn to use the arsenal that God through grace has made available to us to combat negative chatter. We are defined by Him and are His bride; wonderfully made and lovingly held in His arms through the trials and tribulations of life. There will always be storms and rain clouds that can dampen our days but with Him we can know peace and that this life and its snubs are small in the scheme of everlasting life. I have found that reframing my day has helped immensely, starting with some devotion and prayer time (might be as small as scripture taped to my bathroom mirror as I get ready to work and a “daily bread” type reflection and scripture as I eat a quick bite with coffee). I listen to “christian” themed music and teachings on the way to work in the car as well as pray on the way. Throughout the day as the barbs of relational issues arise and my persona is battered, I have to make a conscious effort to stop the negative talk (instead of I really screwed up that presentation to “in all things,God has equipped us to do wonderful things in His power”) It is a constant reframing of thoughts into positive affirming ones that are based on how God sees us and how He plans to use us.
I can give great advice, or encouragement to others, but tear myself apart. In the last two plus years I’ve worked from home and being alone most of the day the inside chatter gets crazy :0/. I’ve realized I masked my feelings with humor. Now there is no one to joke with and made to face my feelings. Looking forward to your webcast
So freeing to know that inside chatter doesn’t define me… Defining moments don’t define me. God’s words define me. Can’t wait for the webcast!!!
I have learned that inside chatter will ruin precious moments, it will take over days, and most of all that it will get to even the very best of all of us if we let it. I have also learned that if we make the conscious decision to listen to the still small voice of our Lord and Savior, then the chatter has no other option except to back down and go back where it came from. Our peace in Jesus Christ is one of the greatest gifts we receive from our Father, and it is there for the taking at all times if we choose to. Everything, inside and out, comes down to the constant obedience of our Heavenly Father.
I am 41 and have been in my job for many years I still let that festive chatter seep in. I have to remind myself, sometimes on a daily basis that these things don’t matter. I wish I had known all this when I was growing up. And how, as a mom was in insecure, do you help build confidence in a young girl who is just like her mommy?
Internal chatter is best handled with geting what’s inside, out. Idealy, confronting the issue/person directly is what’s needed. Putting it off will only allow the simmer, steam, boil. It develops other feelings like dread or strife and those are poison to your soul. If you’re not the confrontational type, at least get it out. Be careful not to go running to the phone to only result in gossip and resentment that can build if the person on the other end just adds fuel to the fire instead of talking it through with you. When my mind is full of chatter, especially when I can’t sleep, I write it down. I’ll write in a journal or head to my computer to get the thoughts out of my mind and onto paper. Those tormentive thoughts that bounce around in your brain are looking for a way out and far too often they come out through our mouth without first being filtered. When I write it down I feel a release. Sometimes, that’s all I needed to do, put it into writing. The saying “sleep on it” is actually quite true. I’m amazed at how often I’ll write out some intense thoughts or urgent matters in my mind, to only re-read them in the morning and wonder “what on earth made me harbor that feeling, it really isn’t that bad”. Feelings are first a reaction, but then are a decision. The faster we can stop a thought from turning into a poor reaction the more mature our minds are.
The chatter going on inside hinders relationships on all levels. I am reading Unglued now and I see so much of myself and my reactions to chatter. Praying that the Lord will help to take these things captive and learn to trust Him. This chatter is false and I need to remind myself, sometimes every hour, that my God has greater things for me and he already knows what the outcome will be. He promises to have a perfect plan for us. I trust that.
Inside chatter has always been a constant battle for me to avoid. I always felt different during school years. I made some bad choices which made thigs worse. I have compared myself and my life to others more than I care to remember. Now when the inside chatter starts I remember the song by David Crowder Band Oh How He Loves Us. I sing it to myself over and over and just try to sink into the lyrics and stop focusing on whatever it is that has made me think I’m not good enough in that moment and remember that God has chosen me and that He has plans for me to prosper.
I have struggled with inside chatter for as long as I can remember. Reading Unglued has helped to to really think about what’s going on in my head as I have these hard, untrue thoughts. Asking myself questions about why I think these things has truly helped to quiet these negative thoughts that lead to negative emotions. Also, I really like to recite the Serenity Prayer to myself and remind myself that The Lord is always there to help me through anything that life throws at me. I’m not alone… And that thought helps so much!
Just took your unglued assessment – the results described me perfectly. I plan on listening to the webcast and reading the book later this week..
I have spent most of my life fighting the inside negative chatter of my head. The words or actions of others and the even more hurtful words I have told myself have caused me years of pain and depression. I am trying to keep that negative chatter to a minimum and not let it take over and cause me to be in fear of living. I want to live life to the fullest and teach my children to enjoy the blessings God has given us. The chatter that used to consume days at a time is something He can help me overcome!
I’ve learned that sometimes the chatter is so subtle that I barely notice until I’m feeling blue, disappointed, angry, etc. It is then that I ask myself what messages am I listening to? I have to make an effort to ask God to replace those messages with the TRUTH of His word. This helps to shut down the negative, unholy, useless lies!! Thank you for your ministry in the lives of women.
When we are “left out”, whether by oversight or by a mean-spirited person, we can turn to someone who is even more “left out” and include them in a fun activity or outing. Reaching out to others always lessens our sadness because we are showing a Jesus kind of love.
I agree totally, Julie. Thank you for reminding me.
I seem to lean toward the negative inside chatter simply because it’s easier, more comfortable, it appeases my ‘flesh’ so to speak. BUT it’s not God…God is the tiny whisper that tells you to go in the opposite direction.
i’ve learned that feelings are fickle. that the thoughts in my head hurt way more than the words or actions of another. that depending on the day i can be hurt, angry, happy or thankful for the same thing. that controlling my tongue is as difficult as controlling my thoughts. but with Christ we are a new creation. that the trials he brings us through are to make us full and complete, not lacking anything. and i trust him. with my whole heart.
When I start hearing the inside chatter, I reassure myself that God doesn’t think those things about me, and all that matters is what he thinks.
It’s hard not to make every situation about you. As humans we crave acceptance and we generally tie that directly to how we are treated. In my mind I constantly critique conversations and what was said and what it could have “meant.” The constant struggle over seeking acceptance from my acquaintances and friends can truly be overwhelming. I thank Christ that his acceptance is a given. He means what he says and he whole heartedly loves me. Screw-ups and all!
Chatter from within creeps up louder and louder when I am not constantly in the Word, and allowing outside “things” to creep in casually…rated R movies, TV shows that are funny, but not glorifying God, and friends/colleagues that I should be praying for rather than keeping up with or the materialism/body images, etc. It is a life long process, I have learned to keep it together, being on fire all the time not to be ashamed to walk away in a gossip fest or to make choices on what I stand on.
What I’ve noticed is that my inside chatter has to be radically changed by Gods truth. I grew up with a verbally abusive stepfather who threw much chatter at me- this became what I knew as “who I am” over the years. Thankfully, at the age of 14- I came to know Christ and the TRUTH of who I really am. I am wholly and dearly loved-perfect and complete in Him alone and nothing else (thank you made to crave). Praise God for his truth!
I grew up in a abusive home. I spent a lifetime having conversations in my head. Did I do it right? Will she like or or will she be angry and reject my hard work? This environment grows uncertainty and insecurity so much that as I grew into womanhood it became my outside chatter as well. It not only was the means by which I made decisions it became the way my eyes viewed the world and processed life. Praise God He can reach you from the inside out. As God came to renew and revive my broken spirit and heart He began the process of retaining my brain by using people and gifted writers and Bible studies. Then I began to follow. For years i knew there were issues but couldn’t figure out that internal change needed. In Unglued the door flew open and my ears could hear and I saw change happening. In hearing I was able to defeat yet another inside chatter battle. Why cant I stop. I know I’m more than this spewing of emotions. Being a willing vessel allows God to move my mountains and my landscape of life continues to be transformed in ways I never could because He is mighty and sees the whole while I’m able to see the speck. I’m so excited to dig deeper and let God wow my heart and mind by you abs Sheila’s message. I’ve even wrangled some of my sweet sisters from our women’s group to show up so we can watch God show out in our lives and through your obedience. At 41 my life is His exciting journey hopeless no longer. Broken yet no longer bound. Beauty is the only thing in the eye of beholder. Freedom comes to a willing spirit.
So appropriate for what I experienced on Friday of last week. My inside chatter has included some “cussing words” (from your blog for today) re: being wronged, etc. My friend reminded me of the quote “Hurt people hurt people” and I know this is true. I think I am taking baby steps forward and I end up taking giant steps backward. I’m praying and asking God for peace and closure about the situation last week. I’ve just recently started reading your blogs after a friend recommended reading it, and also Holly Gerth said your book “Made to Crave” was the best book for losing weight. I look forward to reading it.
I have struggled with this problem all my life.. Always being the kid that just didn’t fit in, made fun of at school, no friends growing up, overweight… You begin to believe what people day to a point where you make fun of yourself and cut yourself down like everyone else.. Jesus has saved me more then once when all else fails. Now I still struggle with those inside demons, but I am learning God is with me in the darkest of times to show me there is always light and love in my life even when I can’t see it.
Couple of thoughts….One of the first passages I ever memorized was Eph. 4:29….”Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” The “mouth of my mind” is more powerful than my physical one — no one can hear the words that tear me down, that tarnish the Image of God that I am. The more open we are with each other about our inside chatter the more we can speak God’s truth into one another’s life to rebuild what has been torn down. We need THAT kind of friendship. Imagine being in a group of women who fill themselves up with the truth of God’s word for YOUR benefit, not simply their own. Talk about doing life together!! Final comment: I sure hope the Women of Faith t-shirt isn’t neon pink 🙂 Blessings!!!
What I know about the chatter going on in my mind is that there is an awful lot of it going on in there. It’s swirling around pulling me this way and that and it’s making me dizzy. Lord help me to clear up this chatter and help me to focus on You!
I have struggled with this problem all my life.. Always being the kid that just didn’t fit in, made fun of at school, no friends growing up, overweight… You begin to believe what people day to a point where you make fun of yourself and cut yourself down like everyone else.. Now I still struggle with those inside demons, but I am learning God is with me in the darkest of times to show me there is always light and love in my life even when I can’t see it.
I am starting to have some victory in this area but still have a long way to go. Imperfect progress towards consistently going the Phil. 4:8 route instead of the negative chatter route.
I spent a lifetime having conversations in my head due to life at home. Did I do it right? Will she like or or will she be angry and reject my hard work? This environment grows uncertainty and insecurity so much that as I grew into womanhood it became my outside chatter as well. It not only was the means by which I made decisions it became the way my eyes viewed the world and processed life. Praise God He can reach you from the inside out. As God came to renew and revive my broken spirit and heart He began the process of retaining my brain by using people and gifted writers and Bible studies. Then I began to follow. For years i knew there were issues but couldn’t figure out that internal change needed. In Unglued the door flew open and my ears could hear and I saw change happening. In hearing I was able to defeat yet another inside chatter battle. Why cant I stop. I know I’m more than this spewing of emotions. Being a willing vessel allows God to move my mountains and my landscape of life continues to be transformed in ways I never could because He is mighty and sees the whole while I’m able to see the speck. I’m so excited to dig deeper and let God wow my heart and mind by you abs Sheila’s message. I’ve even wrangled some of my sweet sisters from our women’s group to show up so we can watch God show out in our lives and through your obedience. At 41 my life is His exciting journey hopeless no longer. Broken yet no longer bound. Beauty is the only thing in the eye of beholder. Freedom comes to a willing spirit.
I am just now starting to realize the negative effects of this chatter inside my head. I love how Lysa reminds us that “can’t put the whole of my identity into the smallness of this situation.” I know when things don’t go my way, I sometimes take that specific instance as evidence of EVERYTHING that is messed up in my life. When in reality, I’m doing a lot of things right. I’m trying to replace the negative chatter with God’s voice. Reciting scripture is a good one that I’m trying to get better at. Looking forward to the webcast! 9 pm is great because the little ones are in bed!
Working to quell inside chatter is a lifelong endeavor. Curve balls come our way all day every day, and we have to continually work on staying positive and focused.
One thing I’ve learned about Inside Chatter is I’ve got a lot of it! Our Unglued bible study hasn’t gotten to the chapter on Negative Inside Chatter yet, so I just had to go read it. And oh my, that is seriously a huge problem in my life. I think I could be the spokesperson for Inside Chatter. Ugh. I can clearly see how it has affected me in a very negative way – in so many areas of my life. Sadly, I often allow the Inside Chatter to be the reins that steer me. BUT… I can also see that when I am doing well, those are the times when I have been in God’s Word and allowed the Truth to sink in. When He’s been the Controller, and not my negative thoughts. I’ve also learned that it helps when I talk to a friend about the inside chatter. Sometimes just getting those thoughts out in the open helps me see how misguided they really are.
What I’ve learned is this: If what I’m thinking doesn’t agree with Gods Word…then it is WRONG! Because His Word is always right. I have to align my thinking with His thinking. And to do that, I need to know what He thinks. So, I read and pray and listen….
I have read “Unglued” and have taught it and getting to teach it again. The Inside Chatter was an eye opening chapter to me – I have always had negative chatter – you are not good enough, not pretty, not smart, etc. Reading about your experiences and your helps have been helpful. I am complete in Jesus, He sees me as all the things I think I am not, but coming to realize I am!
Looking forward to the webcast tomorrow.
When I was 4, I went looking for my usual playmate at my aunts house ( we had in common that we both were adopted) and was told by another child “She was naughty so they gave her back”. Unknown to my parents, I then told myself “never be naughty or they’ll send you back too.” Back in the fifties, if I was silly, my Dad would tease ” Hey, keep that up and we’ll give you back to the Indians” but I told myself ” Oh, I must have come from Indians” and started withdrawing: my parents thought I was just “a very quiet, easy child to raise”. Gods word and conferences and a Christian counselor have worked miracles in my life and my Godly husband is helping me see Satan’s use of “coincidences” to keep me silenced- now I am growing into the ministries God has for me ( Grandma/Nanny, church musician and training others to do so too.) Your devotions are SO beneficial. I know God is blessing all of you women for your outreach to all of us.
Thanks for reminding me that only God’s opinion is what I should be worried about. I deal with alot of self esteem issues and even if others are not talking about me I can just “imagine” what they are thinking. I plan to tune in tomorrow night and see what you gals have to say on this subject. You are truly a Godsend Lysa and I pray you can continue on your journey of setting others free of their inner battles!
I’m with you Tonya, Lysa is a Godsend! I’m very excited to learn more tomorrow night!
We just began to study Daniel and it’s also talking about our identity! I’m thankful as an adult to know where my hope comes from but as we encourage our daughter and her with teenage friends it’s a powerful reminder to tell them! My favorite is to tell them that their identity as Daughter of the King of Kings! You’ve been chosen and should feel loved by Christ himself! Thank you for the post!
My insight to ” Negative Chatter” is that it is the baggage that we carry with us for many years. Yet Jesus loves us for our unique and special selves. It is me that carries the chatter and when I fully embrace the love of Jesus it will only be then the chatter will cease.
I didn’t know the impact of inside chatter or actually that it was something that had a name. I didn’t know that I actually had that problem at all until I spoke to the cashier at the local Christian bookstore who, out of the blue, started talking about a book that hea had read recently (by Joyce Meyers) that discussed that exact problem. It was almost as if God had put it on his heart to talk to me about it. I lay in bed almost every night after being awakend in the middle of the night (only God knows why) and can’t go back to sleep. I think about everything and more and my mind makes up all of the possible scenarios that could happen. I think of all of the possible reasons why things happen as they do. The next thing I know, it’s 3 hours later and i’m still awake and it’s time to get up. And I am no better off than when I woke up. I am actually more frustrated with all of the things I had been replaying and creating in my head. I am looking forward to this webcast because I really think that it will give me a lot of insight into that problem that I only recently realized that I have.
I have dealt with inside chatter for so long, and I never had a name for it until I read unglued! I want to thank you so much for writing this book and allowing me to see the truth in all the lies that my inside chatter has been telling me. I felt as though I was so alone no one else could understand the struggle that I would deal with sometimes on a daily basis. That was and is a lie, and I don’t have to feed into the lie. I am now starting to pick up my bile and feel my mind with Gods truth that He loves me, He forgives me! He will never leave me or forsake me. It is not always easy but I am a work in progress thank you Jesus and thank you Lysa you will never truly know how much your books have meant to me.
This is getting better as I get older…maybe now I just forget or simply choose to focus on what is important in my life and who did invite me to their party…not who didn’t!!!
I am so glad that you posted this today, Lysa! I have struggled my whole life with “Inside Chatter”…no matter how well I did is school, in sports, in life…that chatter made me feel “less than”. And, now that I’m a mom of an almost 21 year old girl, I find myself speaking to her about her “Inside Chatter” and encouraging her to turn it off NOW…before she is my age and still wrestling with it.
Pastor’s message was so spot on this weekend! I clung to those words as you did…“For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, AND YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST,” (Colossians 2: 9-10). Knowing that in Him and through Him, I am full is such a gift. As I wrote my notes during the sermon, I gave that a “double star” (**)…because I wanted to discuss it with my daughter later in the day, hoping she had held on to that as well. We are so programmed for the competition, that we overlook the fact that we are not all called in the same way…learning to accept that is such a challenge in our world of being successful and having it all together all the time.
I am trying to teach my daughter from my long-running, on-going struggle to be “alright” in who we are…to know that we are who God says we are…and any other “chatter” that we might hear, is just that…nothing compared to the word of our King!
I’ve struggled all my life with inside chatter. Just this past weekend it hit me hard and it caused hurt feeling between my husband and myself. My sister forwarded Sitting Home Alone to me.Reading it and the scripture you gave helped remind me that my identity is in Christ not people.
I think the inside catter is the worst. At least I think I’m my worst enemy sometime! Thanks for always covering my life topics!
Inside chatter debilitated me for most of my earlier years. Once I began to realize how destructive it was, I had to challenge those negative thoughts/lies that had become my truth. I could only do this with the word of God. Not just knowing his word in my head (because I was good at that) but rather allowing his truth to invade my heart. This took time and was a process. Pastor Bill Johnson has a quote I just love “I can’t afford to have a thought in my head that’s not in His”.
As I grow more in Christ, I still face negative chatter in my life, but I don’t let it take hold to my life. I can say, that as a believer in Christ, I recognize it for what it is, and I am able to hand it over to my God. Strength and wisdom comes from Him!
I just finished the your Unglued book with two dear friends along with the accompanying video done in Florence, Italy. It was such a blessing to each of us as we were able to share our own stories and encourage one another. We all deal with that negative inside chatter at one time or another and it is freeing and liberating to know we are not alone and that there are God designed ways to deal with that…and hope for that imperfect progress.Thanks for doing what God called you to do so many of us can walk with one another in these area’s and be assured of God’s love and our significance to him. I was able to minister to one of these friends 10 year old daughter this weekend who is having some struggles of her own at such a critical time in her young life. We baked and sewed and then went for a treat at the local coffee shop. I trust that by blessing her with that kind of love and attention from God’s heart, then from mine to hers will assure her that she is loved.
Through the years I have learned that most of the time my inside chatter tends to be worrisome or negative. Even when I know that I am loved by God and forgiven beyond my comprehension that chatter seems to tell me that I am not worthy or that I have fallen short in so many ways. Why is it so hard to accept all that God has provided for me through Christ and learn to accept myself as the person that He made me to be? I look forward to the broadcast as I gain insight into how to combat the negative! Thanks for your insights and ministry!
We are not chosen by the friend, the boy, the employer…. The list can be endless. We are chosen by the only One that matters. His choice is not just based on what we allow others to see in us but also in what we keep hidden. We are chosen despite the mess that only He can see.
I have learned that I have to filter out what is being said in my head as to whether it is coming from myself or the enemy. Then I will have a better idea on how to overcome it.
I lost my dad to a heart attack when I was 6 and kids can be cruel, so the chatter began when the bullying about not having my father. From that point on I fought with myself in a constant way about what everything that happene must have really meant an ht it had an underlying meaning that lead to more chatter of being unworthy. I struggled with an eating disorder as a young girl and then feeling like there was no better choice after high school ran into a career in the military. I ended that after 3years with PTSD and an uphill battle with more chatter than ever until I realized that there was a stop button to all te negative words in my soul. All the positive words in the Bible. I have found so many awesome truths that have helped me silence a great deal of the chatter and am really learning to be a conqueror!
Thank you, Lysa, for being so real and inspiring. I know God is using you to minister and mentor other women. So many times it seems like He speaks directly to me through your words.
Inside chatter…a tough one, I tend to be so much harder on myself than I am on others. Your blog especially the direct statement:” Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.” reminded me to keep it all in perspective. I must give grace to myself in the same way I give to others and as the Lord gave to me.
As a mother, it is imperative for me to conquer this and acquire a new vision that allows grace for myself and encourages inside chatter of a loving nature so I may foster the same spirit within my daughter. I look forward to starting this imperfect progress by watching the webcast with my daughter. Again, than you.
Negative inside chatter is definitely something I struggle with. We went through Unglued in our Ladies Small Group and I realized that this is one of the major things that triggers negative reactions for me. Negative inside chatter, when I can’t seem to overcome it, causes me to say things that undoubtedly hurt the other person. I do this most with my husband…much like you shared about the situations with your husband in the book, Lysa. I assume my husband is thinking negative things about me…otherwise, why would he say/do that?! 🙂 I end up telling him that he thinks this or that about me, none of which are actually truth, and that hurts him! My negative thoughts and accusations make our arguments longer and more intense. I need to learn to believe in my worth in my husband’s eyes, but ultimately in God’s eyes. I am so excited about the webcast tomorrow night! I’m signed up and ready to go! Thank you so much for your ministry, Lysa! It has touched my life, the lives of my small group ladies, and so many others! Blessings my sister! 🙂
When those inside voices try to say I am not a good mom, not a good wife, etc….I am reminded I AM a Child of God!!! Reminding myself I am a child of the King keeps me from putting myself down. I am a child of God, I have children that argue. I am a child of God, I have rooms at home that need to be cleaned. Thank you Lisa for reminding me who I am in God!!!
Russell Stover Valentine Day Candy Straws-still hurt my heart to this day-My father withheld his love and approval of me, my entire life. One Valentine’s Day he handed each of my sisters a bag of Russell Stover Valentine’s Candy Straws, except me. I stood there watching, with my heart breaking, but never saying a word. My father’s actions spoke louder than any words he could have spoken-You Marilyn are not good enough, You Marilyn have deeply disappointed me, You Marilyn do not deserve to be loved, You Marilyn are not worthy of my lattention. My father died in 1995 but the hurt and negative inside chatter continues-
This is a post I needed. I struggle daily with this. Not good enough, not a good mom, or wife, can’t do anything, God does not love me. I so often let the negative chatter control my brain. I am learning to not listen and to cling to God’s truth, but it is a hard trip. Thanks for all you do.
I just had an “aha” moment for sure! My inside chatter voice is almost like the TV playing in the background. It’s constantly going….it never stops, but I have the CHOICE to decide what channel I’m going to play. The fulfilling sounds of my creator or the draining lies of the enemy. Thanks Lysa for leading me to this moment. I’m tuning into a positive uplifting channel of inside chatter today!
I’ve learned that the destructive internal chatter of, “not good enough, not pretty enough, not organized enough, not desirable, not measuring up,” can be shut down and shut up when I take a moment daily to remind myself of all the things my Heavenly Father says I AM.
This really hit home for me today. Thank you for this post today.
I can picture myself in those days feeling the same way. But what really hit home was yesterday in my hometown. A 11 year old girl took her life. She was tired of being bullied and picked on and being left out. Her mother said she cried everyday and just wanted to fit in. I feel if only someone would have told her about God maybe she would be here today. I think about my 11 year old son and pray he never feels this way. She felt alone and felt this was her lonely way out. I pray for a way to reach children that feel like this little girl did. I pray that God will show me way to reach out to them and show them his love and grace. I pray for this little girls family and friends and for my son for knowing her and wish he could have helped her some how if he only know. In Jesus name Amen
Letting go of inside negative chatter is hard. As you reminded us in Unglued, we need to humble ourselves as we turn to God letting, Jesus work for good, opening our eyes to recognize and keep Satan away and use conflict for Good in Jesus name.
We only think we know what others are saying about us. They may not be saying anything. Wasted time on negative chatter…Satan just loves to use that time against us.
Thank you for the tiemly reminder to hold every thought captive. I’ve struggled with this for years and am trying to re-route my thoughts by expressing my gratitude to God for all He has provided. Looking forward to learning more tomorrow. Thank you for your ministry!
I’ve learned that the negative thoughts have hindered me from walking into or even finding my purpose. I’ve not allowed myself to be completely free and open for the fear of being rejected. It’s easy to think negative thoughts or areas of improvement but harder to truly see myself as God has created me to be. He did not create me to walk in fear so why I am hesitant to let people see the true me. Again, it’s the fear and lack of control that hinder me. It’s not until I completely surrender the need to control that the negative thoughts are given to God.
One of my dear friends of almost 30 years went home to be with his Savior last night. He always included everyone in all he did and never had a bad thing to say about anyone. Anytime these negative thoughts about not fitting in or that I wasn’t good enough would creep in my mind and life, I knew I could call him up and we would have the best time … Always laughing!!! Just by his actions, I knew I was loved and cared for and that our Heavenly Father had us wrapped up in His arms. I always left feeling whole and loved and always wanted to pass that on to someone else that may have been hurting.
Inside chatter is sometimes all I can hear on certain days of my life and on these days I have to remind myself to hold every thought captive and to fall into the arms of Jesus. I have to also remind myself to be happy for other people in their joyous moments and to push all jealousy aside & that is pleasing in Gods eye as well as the fact that it just feels better overall. I’m thankful for God grace and mercy for all the times I’ve not been able to do this & thankful for his victories & blessing when I have! God is sooo good.
God has been dealing with me to work on the thoughts I think and the words I speak, because they are both so important. So this negative chatter fits in there perfectly for me. I’m glad we have a God who is so patient with us, and He loves to remind us of what our true identity is in Him when we forget! We know the negative chatter comes from the enemy, not from Him, and we don’t have to listen to it.
The inside chatter can be quite deafening at times…God’s word is the only voice that can cut through the chatter. God help me to hear only Your voice.
I’ve learned that no matter what the Enemy of God tells me or I tell myself –
The bottom line is… I am worth dying for!
Among other things, I have learned that inside chatter can be the devil’s way of getting in the back door so as to undermine one’s joy as well as identity in Christ. I’ve learned to pray and positively talk myself through the discouraging messages that might otherwise keep me from sharing the love of God.
Every week at Celebrate Recovery I introduce myself as a believer in Jesus Christ that has struggled with sexual abuse and drug addiction. But my identity is in Jesus Christ and I’m a new creation in Him. It’s good for me to be reminded of that often.
I am learning to recognize the chatter within and making attempts to replace it with the word of God…verses that confirm who I am in Christ! Not yet successful every time but getting better!! 🙂
I used to think that I was the only one who heard inside chatter, it’s a shame we allow it to cause such destruction. When it starts, I try to focus on what God thinks of me.
I’m still learning about my inside chatter. I’m a mother of four children (almost) 6, 4, 3 & 1. We are also recently new home schoolers. My husband believe very differently from many of the people we have been around all of our lives. It has made it very difficult recently as I feel like because we don’t do things the way the majority of those in our circles tend to do things we are now the outcasts. Therefore I have a lot of inside chatter about whether or not I’m liked etc. It’s hard. But I’m thankful for a wonderful friend many miles away that sent me the link to this webcast! I’m so excited to hear some encouragement & how I can battle the chatter!!! Bless you!!
I have struggled with “inside chatter” my whole life, but didn’t really think about it until reading Lysa’s message today. In school I was the last one chosen in our PE class, only an average student and heard many negative comments about how I looked, how I dressed, etc. So inside chatter tends to make me feel negatively about myself and once it starts, I end up beating myself up for not being a better mother, wife, employee, and the list goes on. But, I am who God made me and using His word to combat the negative inside chatter is crucial for me. I look forward to the webcast! Thanks Lysa I appreciate your insight!
Lysa – thank you so much for this post! I have been struggling all weekend with negative self-talk and then feeling sorry for myself for beating myself up so bad – and then more negative self-talk about feeling sorry for myself…just round and round….I love your posts and this is just what I needed to hear today. Thanks!
I recently read this blog by Lindsey Mead Russell in the Huffington Post, Ten Things I Want My Daughter To Know Before She Turns 10. Many of the items spoke to the fact that she is special and should know it and not let others tell her different. The one I liked the most was #8, It is almost never about you. I wish I would have learned this and believed it early on! It’s so true. It IS almost never about you. People make decisions and do things for a variety of reasons, but they are their reasons basesd on what is going on with them, not YOU! If I keep this in mind now, I am able to let things go easier. I do love the idea of this as well “I can’t put the whole of my identity into the smallness of this situation. Or any other for that matter.” I would add that to the list!
To read whole blog, go here http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lindsey-mead-russell/ten-things-ten-years-olds-should-know_b_1553134.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000003&ir=HuffPostBlog&utm_hp_ref=fb&src=sp&comm_ref=false
Inside chatter. Wow what a big topic or I think so. Inside chatter is so diverse. There are times the Lord can break through and help me overcome the lies I believe about myself or others. Others times old recordings can have what I call an automatic pilot and before I know it the recording is playing and I’m looking at some kind of false comfort to help me get through those times. Over the years some recordings no longer play and I am grateful for the victory the Lord has provided me. However there are still area’s that must by now have very deep imprints and I am looking to the Lord in my weakness to be strong. Thank goodness for imperfect progress.
Sometimes those negative thoughts enter our minds so quickly that we almost forget that the person who said them to us the first time has probably long forgotten the ugly words or deed, but we hang onto them like they are jewels we can never part with. I try to shut them down quickly by reminding myself that I am “fearfully & wonderfully made” and I want to dwell on that voice and those uplifting words instead.
It’s one of my worst enemies. I’m single and live alone which opens the door for a whole lot of inside chatter. It’s a very long, hard process but I’m learning to discern the lies of the enemy – not always, but some of the time and as you say that is progress!
I have always had a negative tape playing on repeat in my head. As I get older, I have started to be more deliberate in counter-acting that and trying to replace it with a positive one. Worship music in the car, on the computer, alone time with God, anything I can do to try and counter-act it I have tried. I am still a work in progress,
We all struggle with “inside chatter”. It is so easy to let it beat us down. I am learning that in Christ, I have all of the acceptance, approval, and liking that I need. It is okay to want acceptance, etc… from others, but we don’t need it because we already have it! Zephaniah 3:17 tells us that God delights in us and rejoices over us with singing. He quiets us with His love and yes, He is mighty to save us! And that, sweet sisters is enough!
I have allowed people’s perceptions and wrong choices ignite the inside chatter, of you are not enough, you are not wanted, you are not worth of being pursued, what is wrong with you? It takes time and and a concious determination to believe and receive what Christ says about me, as the absolute truth! But, it is possible, as we have been given Fullness in Christ, to embed that truth in us, day after day, one step at a time. Lisa, thanks for the honesty, the vulnerability and the courage to step out and walk the journey with us, simply being you! God bless you!
I have a hard time with the chatter. It tries to derail me and causes me to lose focus. It makes me doubt myself. It is in those times that I pray to God and lean on him to show me the answer and not listen to the noise.
I have to remind myself often that the negative chatter that I hear is not of God. Getting into his word and remembering how much he loves me helps redirect my thoughts. Lysa, thanks for sharing your experiences. I often relate and learn a valuable lesson.
Great message Lysa! I’m in my 40’s and finally feeling comfortable in my own skin and not letting the smallness of situations affect the whole of my identity. I’ve never been so confident in my life and I wish (as you do) that I could go back to my school-age self and show me that the little things are not important. I also wish I could help my pre-teen daughter see that too.
I’ve learned that negative chatter (also known as stinkin’ thinkin’) can only be silenced by replacing it with God’s truths. And it’s not something you outgrow, but it is something that God can help you overcome.
inside chatter can come back to bite you – long after you thought you had banished it. That’s why it’s so important to recognize it and remember who we are in Christ – that chatter is not from Him!
After reading the post and then the comments, I am relieved to know that I am not the only woman who has this negative chatter! I was starting to feel really alone and down on myself for always comparing myself and feeling less than adequate as a wife, mother, sister, daughter, and friend. When I start to feel this way, I realize I need to get on my knees in prayer and ask Him for his Spirit to guide my mind in the direction that He would have me go. Only He can give me what I need. Only He knows who I really am and what I can accomplish! What a strength that gives me! Thank you all for helping me remember this! God bless.
I’ve learned what matters is what God thinks of me and how much He loves us. He is who matters, pleasing Him, living for Him. As it was mention people shift, the Lord is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. Blessings to you, Lysa.
Have you been in a meeting that becomes unproductive and more destructive due to the conversations and comments? Rather than discussing positive solutions, we continue to wallow in negativity.
What you call the “Inside Chatter”, we call “The Committee”. When the thoughts start really bouncing around in there a simple mention of “The Committee” lightens my mood and opens my eyes to what I am doing. My sister has even given names to some of those voices in the committee LOL! Making light of this crazy brain makes the transition easier.
The key is to be the Chairman of this “Committee meeting” and redirect the conversation when you find it making that turn. Use some words from Christ to redirect to another angle or simply change the topic.
Another term we use is dilemmaling: Turning a simple decision into a dilemma, and then continuing to complicate it with more dilemmas.
Thank you Lysa for you true to life posts! Its always good to hear that I am not the only one!
Oh Lisa, I fight my inside chatter daily. Life has handed me many challenges. My husband is a chronic pain sufferer & has been unable to work for 4 years. He’s only 52 & he used to be so active it’s hard for both of us to adjust. My mother has alzheimers, she’s almost 86 & now, I’m trying to get her into a nice assisted living (it breaks my heart). Our income has been cut in half & I’m still paying off the same bills but, with 1/2 the money. One thing has gone up though, my weight, lol. I thank God every day that He never makes me go through all of this by myself. That He helps me see the positive, that He shows me so much love that I’m able to show that love to my wonderful family. I don’t know why we have to go through the things we do but He does & that’s all I need to know. So, I work daily to have the inside chatter be positive, encouraging & loving because God made me in His image, He chose me & every day I will remember that. Bless you & thank you for always encouraging all of us.
I learned that what people think of me or include me in do not define me. Regardless of whether they like me or include me I am loved by my heavenly father more than anyone on this earth could ever think of loving me. It is through the fullness of Christ that define who I am, and when those inner chatters that Satan puts in my head start I can put a stop to them by knowing this.
My husband struggles so much with the negative chatter. There are times that I do too. I always try to remind him (and myself) that we are worthy, valuable, and belong simply because of one thing . . . we are God’s creation and He loves us. That doesn’t completely remove the sting of hurt feelings when left out, etc but it sure does put things in a much, much better perspective. The Bible tells us Jesus was a human and it makes me wonder how He felt when people ignored him, talked about him, and did everything in their power to shame and destroy Him even to the point of death. If I think about what Jesus dealt with while on this earth, these situations really are small when it comes to our identity.
I have also learned through the years that the inside chatter is normally negative and i try not to let it bring me down. Usually i talk to besie and we pray for one another. Also, reading my devotions help!
Oh, how I resonate with not being a member of the “cool crowd.” All the “un” words apply:
I even fell into thinking that the disapproval was the measure of how lovable I was–or was not.
What I have learned about inside chatter is that I have a lot of old tapes… tapes that need to be erased… tapes that need to hear we’ve stepped into another century and they can’t be played on my iPod. They’re in the wrong format… and even more so because they don’t fit the truth Jesus etched into my heart when He crafted me–fearfully and wonderfully.
I need to sing the new song so loudly that I can’t even hear the mindless chatter.
I have found that I have to be very intentional about not going there because once the negative chatter about one part of my life starts I follow it all the way down and it influences every part of my thinking and my day!
inside chatter has and will always be there. As a young person it seemed to be so sad, destructive, hateful, lonely, left out….etc. And a lot of WHYS????? …Why did this or that happen to ME?? Why is life and people so unfair?? WHY ME??? There are times when these old feelings and chatter happen now, too. But as one grows older, matures, and we get “smarter”….the chatter seems to change….it is still there but now, as an adult it seems somewhat easier (most of the time) to deal with. My chatter seems to deal a lot with other people and what or how I feel about them…. I try VERY hard to remember that ONLY the LORD can judge another person, only the LORD really knows what is going on in someones life. Sometimes when the negative chatter gets too loud, I will say the Lords Prayer, or another meaningful Bible verse…and that usually at least SLOWS down that negative chatter…I have so much to learn and am looking forward to your broadcast.
It has occured to me that my “inside chatter” often starts without my awareness–like someone starting a conversation without me being ready to listen. Soon, the conversation in my head demands my attention. Sometimes it is positive and uplifting. Sometimes it is negative and depressing. At other times, it calls me to action. So, I listen. If it is encouraging, I embrace it. If is valid and demands a response, I give ear. If it is hindering my ability to function with joy and confidence, I pray God will clear my head and silence the chatter. As soon as he does. I hear Him speaking and there is peace.
Thank you Lysa for this reminder! We are never forgotten by our Redeemer!
Man, reading this reminds me of what happened yesterday. I found out I was left out of a big event. The news stung, hurt and I got angry. Than I remembered this is not the end of the world and this does not define my place in this world. Jesus has blessed me far beyond what I could have even dreamed for myself so for that I am truly blessed & thankful. As for the event, maybe there is a reason I’m not meant to be apart of it.
Negative chatter is just as hurtful for a 40 year old as it is for a teenager. It seems we never grow out of the “feeling left out” blues. It happened to a lady at work recently (although it was completely unintentional) and the hurt in her voice and on her face brought up recollections of my youth. My biological father abandoned me at 18 months (I’m 48 now and I never saw/heard from him again until 2 years ago when a brother found me on facebook. I ended up meeting “dad” and although I forgive him and we do have somewhat of a relationship now I will never forget the feelings of looking in the mirror and wondering why I wasn’t wanted. Satan sure knows how to whisper that “you’re not wanted” in your ear but God’s Word tells me different. Thank you Lord for “wanting” me and all the other hurting women in this world.
This is me a lot of my life. I thank you for inviting me to a free meeting. Would love to listen, but have college this night- may not be able to attend. However; this is very giving of you since I know I feel like this as well as others a lot of the time.
As I have grown in Christ these past 37 years so has The volume of His Spirit in mine. The chatter still makes it way in but is easily drowned out by the Greater one living in me, “greater is He that lives iin me, than he that lives in the world!” 1 John 4:4.
I can quench the fiery darts of the wicked one with my shield of faith! Eph 6:16
Thanks for today’s message, it is a good reminder to constantly listen to His voice!!
I have dealt with the feelings of unacceptance most my life. As I entered my 30’s started l started to accept myself as God made me and found joy in that. While creeping into my 40’s I rarely have those negative self talks even the negative voices from my past have been muted by God’s loving hand. The more I learn about God the more I appreciate myself and those around me.
I have learned that comparing my insides (feelings) and inside chatter to other people’s outside appearences is never a good plan!
This is my first time writing on a blog like this… Talk about nerve recking and negitive inside chatter going on inside me. What if people don’t like my post? And everyone knows the chain reaction. As a girl in school, I was pretty and did cheer, but I was always the odd ball. Always the last one to be thought about. I always said it was ok when I had tons of questions and concerns running in my mind. Now I am a little older, a wife, and I have realized my fullness is in Christ. I am who God says I am. To have a Christ like behavior and to give without expecting anything back because if we can do that we will receive far more Joy than sitting around waiting for someone to come to us. Looking forward to tomorrow! Everyone have a wonderful day!! 😀
Thank you for caring and giving to many of us who feel like this.
I am learning and relearning that I need to replace the negative chatter with God’s truth. Recognizing the negative chatter before it gets me down so I can replace it is still a challenge for me but with God’s help I am getting better.
I have learned specifically that if I let the negative inside chatter move from a controlled neutral place then the thoughts quickly spiral into a speed all their own. My negative chatter appears to provide that slight crack in my spiritual armor which Satan easily enters to erupt a fissure of negative emotions. I am quickly overwhelmed into “I am a bad person”, “not liked”, can’t get along with others”….. The negative chatter sounds so real doesn’t it? Even as an adult I work on this issue weekly. How I combat it to Say, I am a child of God. I go to Ephesians 6:11 about putting on the whole armor of God.
When really spinning from a negative chatter presence, I go to the contact page on my iphone about MY Positive Chatter: specific things, actions, items that are good about me, my abilities, what I have done, my children, my blessings. This easily accessible right in my face “who I am” moves me from a negative chatter spot to focus on what God has done in my Life and the direction He has me headed. Keeps things in perspective instead of the negative blah blah blah. Calms my mind, closes that crack in my Armor with God’s love and purpose.
I have learned to turn to God’s word everyday…not just when I begin to feel “blue” from the negative chatter. Staying in God’s word helps me to recognize sooner that the negative chatter is trying to get me down.
Inside chatter became ugly truth for me not realizing it wasn’t true at all. I have carried tons of it around my whole life. It’s hard to recognize these thoughts sometimes because they just become part of living, or more like living defeated. That’s not what God wants yet it’s difficult to make the switch…
Thank you for this post. This is something I still work on daily. Taking those “chatter” thoughts captive and getting rid of them!! I am my own worst enemy. I need to lean on God more. I surrender one minute all my chatter thoughts and take them right back the next. I am going to sign-up for the webcast right now! Thank you for the opportunity.
I feel like I have been there many times. I wish I had known Christ and my place with him then. Although when you are young it is hard no matter what you know.
I have learned that when I am feeling down or out of sorts I need to check my inside chatter. I don’t even know it is happening until I start to wonder why I am feeling the way I am. Then I start to hear it “you aren’t good enough”, “you can’t do that, you aren’t smart enough”, “that is silly to think you can do that”, and then I stop – get out my iphone and pull up YouVersion and read about what I am in Christ.
I just have to keep reminding myself that God loves me the way I am even if I don’t love myself. He NEVER changes and that gives me comfort when all my world does is keep changing.
My inside chatter reminds me negative weight loss and parenting chices that I should of made better. I do have an on going chatter with God but the moments of life in between don’t always express my true love for myself, my children or the gracefulness of life. I continue to try being the adult that God loves. Thanks for the encouragement on this life journey
What a combo, Sheila and Lysa. I have learned so much in WOF. The main thing I have learned is that I am complete in my SAVIOR. I have also learned that it does not matter what any one thinks of me but HIM. I am loved, forgiven, and saved for a life in eternity with HIM.
I have battled with inside chatter all my life I have delt with a ton of self-esteem and insecurity issues that could fill a dump. Satan is constantly feeding me lies and unfortunately sometimes I listen. Lately the battle has been the timing of us serving in the mission field. We are seeing so many friends leave and we are very excited for them but then Satan comes in and says “That should be you. Why does your husband have to go through all that schooling? You will never get there, your children will all be grown before you get there.” And on and on it goes. I have to dive back into the word and hold fast to the promises of God. I am right where I am suppose to be His timing is perfect there is a reason why we are where we are now and it will glorify HIm. I need to take my eyes off myself and keep them on HIm no matter what and be patient. That is so hard! The patient part!
I have struggled with negative chatter all my life. Usually it is about my abilities in my work. I will be tuned in tomorrow night because I desparately need to know how to fight it, how to ask God to speak to the negativity. I am still single but I want to gain strength over this so that, God willing, when I have children this isn’t a trait I pass on to my children.
I learned to combat negative inside chatter when I realized it’s not always kept inside and learned to keep my mouth shut, literally. A lot of times the negative comments are said out loud, under our breath, like “i was so stupid to do that,” or “how could I have been such an…” Etc. try it! It really is harder to complete these thoughts with your mouth closed! Makes become more aware of what youre actually thinking about yourself.
The chatter is horrid! It happens at such an early age too! My daughter is already dealing with it and I am attempting to quench it in my own life so that I might help her early on.
Instead of dealing with our own chatter I believe that many women unconsciously cause others to doubt themselves in order to make our own chatter diminish… if even for a short time.
I still deal with this as an adult.We were just left out of a wedding.We are the only family that didn’t get invited.I have to cast down those voices that want to creep in and I always say there is something God wants out of me from this situation and not take it personal.I have to walk in forgiveness.
One thing I have learned about Inside Chatter is that it is a MUST to fill my head with SOMETHING. And the beatiful things is that I get to choose what I fill my head with. I can allow my head to be filled with the negative junk or I can choose to fill my head with God’s truth. Junk vs. Truth. It seems like a no-brainer to me.
However, I often choose the junk on a whim…. and then I have to deal with the consequences. I am so thankful for your book, Lysa. It has really helped me so much in realizing what goes into my negative reactions. And negative chatter use to play a huge part. Thanking God for victory in this area!
Thank you once again for such inspirational words of wisdom. I have a 10yr.old daughter in 5th grade. This very issue of not being invited or made to feel unwanted by a group of girls is a real issue still today. I hope to be able to encourage her to feel whole and complete in the Lord. We have all been invited to be a part of his group of friends and family for eternity!!!!!
I am so terrified of failing professionally that my “inside chatter” is not sparked by others reactions to me, but myself. I have learned that even if I do fail to get an interview for a position that doesn’t effect my identity, as an individual or as a child of God
Sometimes my inside chatter is more about what I think of myself than what others think. I tend to believe that everyone must see my flaws as magnified as I do. I’m looking forward to the day when I learn to accept myself the way God does. Flaws and all.
Thank you for your post. It’s a great reminder about the inside chatter we all listen to, more than we should. I’ve lived with that negative voice all of my life. It wasn’t until I read, The Lies We Believe by Chris Thurman back in the 80’s that I came to realize, Satin is the only one who wants me to believe all that negativity. God loves me and thinks I’m special which is the truth I need to focus on, when those lies start creeping back into my thought processes.
Thank you again for your words of wisdom! 🙂
Thanks for your post today. I have always struggled with low self esteem issues which make me afraid to put myself out there and try to be the best I can be. So afraid I just won’t come across as smart enough or worthy enough to give an opinion. I can’t wait for your webcast tomorrow night. I know God loves me just the way He made me.
I have learned that if the voice inside my head doesn’t line up with word and what it says about me that it is a lie. I have learned this but I don’t always practice this. The lies can be so subtle sometime that it is easy to fall into the trap of believing them.
February 20, 2012 my husband left to be with another woman; the inside chatter that followed was overwhelming. It included all of the things that could be wrong with me, everything that I didn’t do right, all of the things that he must have wanted to change about me, but what felt the worst was all of the inside chatter about what she was or what she had that I didn’t. The Holy Spirit was able to speak above the chatter though. First through a book called Intimate Issues by Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus. In the book they explain that God gave each of us the gift of free will, and even when we use that gift to make horrible decisions that are hurtful to others, to ourselves, and even to God he won’t take that gift away from us. The Holy Spirit comforted my heart with the fact that God didn’t overlook me, forget me, or do this to me; he simply refused to take his gift of free will away from my husband even though he was making a hurtful decision. God also spoke to me through Isaiah 54: 4-6
“Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame.
Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.
You will forget the shame of your youth
and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.
5 For your Maker is your husband—
the Lord Almighty is his name—
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
he is called the God of all the earth.
6 The Lord will call you back
as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—
a wife who married young,
only to be rejected,” says your God.
I was not alone, the One who made me still loved me and He saw beauty and a future in me. Slowly the inside chatter of how I wasn’t good enough began to quiet as the love of the Lord reminded me that I am His.
I constantly hear inside chatter and do struggle with it daily. I have been working on it for about a year and have finally come to the realization that what everyone else thinks of you makes no difference. Jesus loves me just as I am and I am beautiful inside and outside to him. Thank you for loving us so much Jesus.
I can’t honestly say I’ve gotten past the inside chatter to have learned (past tense) anything. What I am learning (present tense) is that inside chatter loves to happen when I’m at my weakest; whether physically, emotionally (mostly emotionally) or spiritually. I’ve read so many books on how to combat it, but when the rubber meets the road, I have not figured out how to silence it when I’m in the throes of it. In other words, I just haven’t been able to transfer it from head to heart. Maybe someday.
“Inside Chatter” causes me to feel very unhappy, unfocused and not someone who I want to be, what Ive learned that changing the way I feel about situations will also change your emotions toward it, you can choose negative or postive. It is a constant battle, but as you practive postivie self talk, the battle seems to come easier each time you do it. I am trying to love the way that God loves me, that means I need to love myself the way that God loves me : UNCONDITIONALLY. No matter what I do, mistakes and achievements, it is imparetive to love yourself unconditionally. That no matter what I do God will love me, and that means that no matter what I do I need to love me. Thank you for sharing this story! It was very inspiringing and valuable
I have learned that inside chatter is the devil. He is wanting to bring us down and down we go. Inside chatters tells us we are fat, have no friends, puts us in the comparison mode and we always come up short, and before we know it, we have spiraled ourselves into depression. I have done this and I remember that I am unique, God made me with special talents that are to be used to glorify him. I am unique. I am looking forward to the webinar to reinforce the inside chatter is damaging.
I am writing to you, Lysa, because I need to learn more about fighting the negative chatter that goes on in my head on a daily basis. I deal with constant guilt and condemnation, feeling like everything is all my fault. I need God more than I ever have right now. Can you please help me?
I too have felt the sting of rejection and still often hear the lies of the enemy telling me, you’re not worthy, no one likes you, etc.
As I’ve gotten older I can recognize the lies easier and turn to The Lord and His TRUTH about who I am in Christ. It’s been a long road and just yesterday I found some of those old familiar thoughts springing up. Thank you for this timely post! I will be tuning in!
Looking forward to the web cast!!
I don’t know about the rest of you, but I have some inside chatter that likes to SCREAM at me, and sometimes that is worse than the inside chatter that just whispers quietly. But sometimes it’s not either. Sometimes the whispering chatter is even more evil. The squeaky wheel gets the oil, but sometimes those whispers can make you just stop turning to where you don’t even NEED the oil.
This chatter is something I still struggle with and it breaks my heart to see how much my teenage daughter struggles too. I pray that the promise of who I am in Christ can be louder than the chatter in my mind and I can show my girl how loved she is by me and more importantly, God.
I often hear inside chatter – fearful/anxious thoughts always seem to be running through my mind. What seems to help me is by saying, “God, this is in YOUR hands”. It seems that as soon as I say that, I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders!
I can completely relate with this post. I first dealt with rejection at a very young age & throughout my adolescent & teen years. I’ve been learning over the last five years that the only One who truly matters has always accepted me & loved me & He always will. People will disappoint & hurt us throughout life but we can’t find our worth in them & whether or not we are accepted or rejected by them. My worth, my true identity is in Christ. I need to tell that negative chatter the truth when it tries to tell me lies. I hang onto & meditate on scripture that reminds me who I am in Christ, I am who He says I am!
Sometimes inside chatter may be very real and very true. The inside chatter may be what is really happening, may be our actual situation at the moment, and we talk ourselves into believing this chatter to be truths about us, about our character. What we fail to realize is that this situation is JUST for this moment. How we choose to reflect on it, how we choose to “talk” to ourselves about it (inside chatter) all depends on who we want to listen to.. Do we listen to God? or do we listen to the enemy or our situation? God tells us we are HIS! And as His children we are victorious over any and every situation life throws at us. This moment will pass, this situation will resolve one way or another and be in the past for us to learn from and grow from, not define us for the remainder of our lives. Instead of listening to our inside chatter, we need to listen to God’s “chatter” by standing on His Promises and listening to His Spirit telling us the Truth through God’s Word.
I’ve learned that the enemy will bring it up to you whenever you start something new for God. I’ve also learned that if God led me to it, then HE will give me all that I need to do it 🙂 God’s word gives me so much to replace the chatter with truth.
Hi everyone! The general topic of friends is one I am exploring on my blog. The self-doubt, worry, envy, etc that comes along with friendships is a tough one. But, what I am trying to focus more on is what God things of me. And less of what others think.
It is almost constant lately (esp. when things go wrong) and it seems to be on autopilot. Takes a lot of prayer and effort to beat it down
This resonates so much with so many of us. Especially with Facebook and social media….you see others ‘doing’ things together, posting their pics and you think ‘why wasn’t I invited’, etc…It can mess with your head. And if you are not grounded in the Lord, it can make you feel unloved. I’ve been listening to that chatter too long and its time I listen to the One who created me and loves me whether I’m invited or not.
Satan does love isolation. US in isolation, that is. Because it allows him to sneak in silently and whisper lies to us. Those that say, ‘we aren’t worthy’, ‘we aren’t loved’, ‘we aren’t worth much to anyone’….and it’s SO not true!!
SO….when we feel isolated, we need to bring God in first. He will overcome. He will fill those voids that circumstances sometimes drill into our hearts. Not easy! But a MUST!
We need to become confident in our God and with that we gain confidence in ourselves and we can choose to wear that instead of Satan’s lies as we walk through this crazy world.
Unfortunately, the negative thoughts have taken over me. I feel like a failure in all of my relationships. I isolate myself from others, thinking they don’t want to associate with me anymore. I don’t participate anymore and only do what I need to do for my son’s sake. Just living one day at a time … going through the motions. I pretend things are okay, but I hurt so much inside. Your daily devotions keep me going, and I thank you for that. – Kristi
It’s been more years than I care to count since I changed high schools four times due to my dad’s job. Needless to say, I wasn’t included in a ton of stuff since no one knew me! But all these years later,every time I get left out of a gathering…especially a girlfriend get-together, my inside chatter shouts at me about my “unworthiness .” I praise God that because of Jesus I am not unworthy. I just need some positive self-talk to get through the hurt.
Lysa, I’ve been praying for your hearing…12 years ago I woke up totally deaf in one ear, and also deal with tinnitus. Hang in there,sister.
I just found this website! I had been working for a Christian man who owned his own company, and he asked me to help him. I jumped at the chance, it was a part-time job, I had quit teaching to concentrate more on my family, time was slipping away and I wanted to be more of a Mom. This boss paid me well, I was home when my kids got home, everything seemed great, until this boss sold company, and treated me like I was a no one. I forgot to mention, this man was a very good friend of our famines. We would go out to dinner as couples, do things together, we were friends! Everyone in company got something. Except me! I was crushed, angry at God, so hurt words couldn’t describe. My husband was amazing, he said be happy for them, be happy we will be fine. I felt betrayed and hurt by a Christian man who couldn’t be honest with me sorry for venting but Lysa thank you so much for this website. God is so good and heaves even me!
Guess I haven’t learned much about negative chatter since it still controls me. I need to learn to the chatter is not always true and learn to believe in myself and focus on God.
“Inside Chatter” is a battle in my life for sure. I was never really “in” the group in school. I had a group of close friends but none of us were “in” that group. Your pink shirt story hit home with me. There is a lot of pain inside from those kinds of situations. The inside chatter is what keeps me from getting a Facebook page. The inside chatter kept me from attending my 20 year class reunion. The pain of the past was just too much to deal with….20 years later. Good grief….Really???….’em…yes.
Looking forward to the webcast.
My inside chatter always tells me I am not worthy or respected enough to do the task at hand and I will never conquer the mountain!
“Inside chatter”, to me, equals satan’s lies.
I have OCD and satan’s lies have tried to make me doubt my character and who I am as a person for years (to the point of having disabling self-doubt). A few quotes that I have jotted down are:
1) “we listen to the lies of satan… … … when we need to let the truth of God’s word break through the lies.” – a friend of mine who is a youth pastor
2) “We’re going to have to let truth scream louder to our souls than the lies that have infected us.” – Beth Moore
3) “We can’t recognize lies if we don’t know truth.” – Beth Moore
My faith has been huge to me, as it is to everyone reading this, I’m sure. I’ve realized it’s important to know who I am in Christ and, as Beth Moore has put it: “I am who God says I am.”
One thing I’ve learned in my walk with Jesus is that everything happens with a purpose. As I began to recognize the ‘negative chatter’ came from Satan, my question was “Why is he doing this”? I understand now that the enemy’s purpose is to distract me from hearing the voice of God. The enemy also intends to choke the life out of the Word God’s already put in me. If Satan can keep me distracted and block my hearing, I am not productive in God’s kingdom. So when I recognize the chatter, I try to immediately speak against the thoughts and push further to see what it is that so important to God that Satan is trying to keep me from hearing it. Hearing the chatter causes me to forces me dig deeper into Christ.
I struggled with inside chatter growing up because of my mom’s drug and alcohol abuse. I was teased mercilessly and everyday I would wonder what people were saying about me, my mom. Even now that I’m older, as a mom and wife, I still battle the chatter from time to time. One issue I had to overcome was whether or not my hubby’s best friend wife even liked me. I tried to include her in outings, invited them over, tried to schedule other events and each time she would reply that they were busy doing other things. At first I told myself that she didn’t like me but as time passed, I’ve just come to accept the fact that maybe she and I may not be close as my hubby and best friend are and that’s ok with me. But I’m always open and willing if/when she does come around.
I have learned a lot about my inside chatter over the last 10 years or more, and that the inside chatter of negative stuff heard in my head is so much satan. It took me tell i was 35 to learn by reading a Dr Phil book that you become what you tell yourself. If you tell yourself your worthless, or can’t run a mile, or could never be a bicyclist that can ride many miles a day cause you are not built for it, then that is what you become, Someone you can’t. But when you tell yourself I can run a mile without stopping, maybe not today, but over time of baby steps, you will be amazed at what you can accomplish. My goal now is teaching my children you can do anything, it just takes baby steps and time. You have to make inside chatter positive!!
I have faced the same thing, not been invited to a birthday party, I had all those same feelings. God has taught me, over the years, to base who I am on how he sees me and on what his word says about me as his child. He loves me, he has forgiven me, he is my helper and my strength. I am a child of the King….that is a miracle in its self. Yet, sometimes I get caught off guard and find myself listening to the “inside chatter” all the doubts come in like a storm. Telling me, you are no good, no one likes you, you aren’t as good of a friend as the others are. I have learned to keep God’s promises wrote down in a little book and read them often and stand firm on what he says. God says to think on the good things not the things of the world. Also in Proverbs 3: 5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Satan wants to get me down and he will use my friends and family to make me feel helpless and lonely. If he can get me feeling sorry for myself I won’t be a threat to him. God can’t use me when I am consumed with doubt and anger. I need to pray and ask God to show me his truth in his word and be encouraged by it. I need to forgive the one who hurt me, that person isn’t perfect, and I’m not either. I need to pray for them and leave it to God. I can’t wait to hear your message for tomorrow night.
Someone wisely told me to ask myself if Jesus would say the same thing to His chosen. So when self-talk included “way to go, stupid” I would say a prayer asking for forgiveness for talking to His child in such a way.
Lisa, I don’t know how you always capture exactly what I have felt at least once in my life, but you do. As a child, teen, and adult. This past year has been one of the hardest ever, as I struggled to survive the betrayal of my best friend of 10 years. I could have never anticipated the full impact and devastation that my negative inside chatter would have on my life. I let the chatter isolate me, take me out of any involvement with ministry at my church, convince myself that I was totally alone and abandoned, and unworthy. Through much crying out to God, confessing my feelings, confronting my hurt, and through reading your book, Unglued, I have slowly been able to forgive, and stop the negative chatter before it becomes negative screaming! I have reminded myself already this morning not to give the enemy one inch of mind- turf!
I have learned that God doesn’t speak to us through incessant, negative chatter. He breathes life into us through people who are willing and capable of speaking life into us. The chatter is constant and never uplifting and it is perpetrated by the deceiver. We must surround ourselves with those who will lift us up, and we must remember that as children of the most high King we have the authority to put the deceiver in his place beneath our feet.
Thanks for the post Lysa! We all have a story like this I’m certain. It has taken me a long time, but this is what I say out loud when negative chatty- chat starts . . . “That was then, this is now. That was then, this is now.” I keep saying it until I get it and then I move on!!!
So excited for this. My word for 2013 is discipline… and disciplining myself to turn to God’s word – replace my negative thoughts with the GOOD thoughts He has towards me, of me, etc. So excited for this webcast!
Great advice for my teenage girls! Thank you.
I have learned or rather learning not to believe everything I think. So often I have made my thoughts my reality when that is just not truth. So by really taking my thoughts and saying to myself is this true or is this a lie I have helped overcome some deep hurts that I have brought on myself. I do still struggle with this and there are days that I fail but thankfully God isn’t done with me yet 😉
I deal with inside chatter more now then U ever did as a young girl. A lot of it has to do with past mistakes, things I regret and who I am in Christ. I have found the chatter with scripture, prayer and praise works to get my thoughts on the right track. Colossians 3:2 and Philippians 4:8 are a couple I often call to mind. I go through the list in Phil. 4:8 and ask myself if what I’m thinking are those things. I also find that sometimes I need to process and get to the root of the chatter which usually isn’t fun, but is always freeing in the end… to make sense of who you are.
I meant to say I in that first sentence.:)
And “I have found that combatting…” in the second sentence! This is what I get for typing this on my phone! Lol!!
Thank you for your words and for this great opportunity to better ourselves! I didn’t have any one specific incident in my life that sticks out, but there is always the battle within of “what did that person mean by that comment? Am I not good enough? What do they think of me?” etc. Those whispers are always there. I used to be in the corporate world and climbing the ladder and 4 yrs. ago I made the switch to work at our church with children. I still get comments on why would I go for less pay and why not stick with corporate…it’s more powerful, etc. And I too, have self doubts on is this enough for me, etc. In my position, I’m able to chat with 20-25 staff women who struggle with this exact same thing and they have backgrounds that are tougher than mine. I’d love to be able to share these books with me and help them on their personal/spiritual journey!! I believe I’m in this position for a reason…God’s reasons!
Well over the years, I have learned (and still am learning) that the inside chatter – those inside voices that are screaming at me to get my attention – telling me all the things that I am not, tend to go away when I don’t focus on them and instead focus on that sweet small voice that tells me I am good enough, I am loved, redeemed, the righteousness of Christ, fearfully and wonderfully made, and so much more I don’t have to give that chatter a listening audience. Lysa, thanks for all you do and will continue to do!
This post was just what I needed today! My internal chatter over perceived rejection can be so defeating sometimes. I am trying to replace it with God’s Word — specific verses or even just praising God over and over. And, of course, praying for God’s help. His help doesn’t come suddenly in the form of a feeling of self-confidence or laughter. But, after several minutes, I do realize that my mind has shifted and I don’t feel so bad anymore.
However, I have to be willing to give up the negative chatter. Thank you for one more weapon to fight the lies!
I have struggled with “inside chatter” all of my life and continue to do so. I have a teenage daughter who struggles with it as well. I have prayed about it and also remind myself on a daily basis that the negative thoughts are not true and that I am not necessarily the cause of every perceived hurtful things that others do, but it is a constant struggle. I even try to convince myself not to care, but deep down I just do. I know my daughter is the same way. I look forward to your podcast and will have her watch it with me.
Just this morning I was dealing with negative thoughts and going down a thought path I didn’t need to go down. The key is remembering I don’t have to do this. God wants me to renew my mind with His word & I can & did change these thoughts by meditating on who I am in Him. Thank you Lysa for this timely post!
Our granddaughter is going through very much of the same kind of pain. She is very quite and introverted, but desperately wants SOME friends. We encourage her to be willing to go up to other and make small talk, ask them about their church, etc., but she still struggles. Her school years have been plagued with loneliness. I’m forwarding this blog to her to read. Maybe she can see that others feel the same way and there is hope in GOD!
I cant say I have conquered it yet…by sheer chance (God?) I had checked out Unglued from the library and had it bedside when my life group from church of 9 years decided I asked too many questions (I wondered why a dear friend was being excluded after being in the group before) and pretty much asked me to leave…..every Monday nite…9 years 🙁 this just happened 7 weeks ago…I clung to that book before I had to return it and have told all kinds of women about it 🙂 I am trying to get back to church where I only know these women and I have to say the chatter in my head is non-stop…(even at 62 yrs old~!) we never stop learning…I love your blog…read it daily…love your books…praying that He leads me to a new life/group/peace this year.
blessings to you my friend~ xo
Oh my, how I needed to hear this today. It took me back to so many times in my past when I have been left out, made fun of and bullied. Fortunately, as a woman I have found that my identity is in Christ, not what others think of me. But, I still battle with self doubt and insecurity. As a mother, as a wife, as a daughter, as a sister…there are so many things that happen in a day that can trip me up and make me doubt my worthiness. I feel as if I have to be perfect all the time or I’m just no good. That is when I have to fill my head with good thoughts and God’s word so that I don’t listen to Satans lies. It’s a battle.
I have struggled with negative inside chatter my whole life. I was mercilessly teased in elementary school for being a very emotional child, and that has stuck with me my WHOLE life. To this day, I don’t deal well with clique-y situations or situations where there’s a lot of gossip and behind-the-back talking going on; my inside chatter kicks in, and makes me struggle to get past feeling inadequate and inconsequential. Praise God for calling me beloved, though–I can take comfort in knowing that like you said, these are the SMALL moments. These are not identity-defining, these are not all-encompassing, these are not the be-all, end-all of who I am. Sometimes it’s still hard to remember, but I’m getting better at recognizing that negative self-talk and nipping it in the bud!
Actually, this hit home perfectly for my daughter today. She came home from school this morning because the spring musical cast list went up and she wasn’t on it! She adores music and musicals, and it was her fondest desire to be a part of this year’s musical. I didn’t know how to console her. I hope this will help her get through this. Thank you!!
I needed this today! Thank you so much!! Wouldn’t it be nice if people would think of others feelings before they do something like that. Sad thing is it doesn’t end when you become an adult.
I have finally learned whose voice the inside chatter really is. I have struggled pretty significantly because of this. I have struggled with many self esteem issues, and it has horribly affected my relationships with others, especially my spouse. I struggled to have friends because I was so afraid of what others thought of me. I allowed my husband to abuse me because I thought I wasn’t good enough, and I was afraid of being alone. I am thankful today to be able to say that because of God’s unconditional love and passion for me, I now that I am a princess….daughter of the one that matters the most. My priorities have shifted first to him, then everyone/everything else. Keeping my eyes fixed on Him is the most important thing I must do each day to keep the inside chatter in check!
Inside Chatter. What mean words. I’m thankful for my age that those mean words do not have as much of an effect on me as they use to when I was a teenager. However, even with my “church ladies” that I hang with…when I see that I wasn’t included in an event it kind of hurts your feelings. So, I am right back where I use to be. Looking forward to your webcast Lysa. 🙂
Hhmmm…..still a work in progress for me I guess! I am being forced to address it though as our oldest child seems to find negative ‘internal chatter’ a challenge too. I too thank you for this post today….just what I needed to hear from God! I don’t want to trudge wearliy through another day.
As a Pastor’s wife I have a lot of inside chatter that I have to tune out. It feels like people are always watching you and your family and how you do things, and if you mess up it’s a big deal for you and those watching you. I have found that being in God’s word at least a couple times a day, listening to Christian music, and prayer really make a difference in the thoughts that come and go throughout the day. The negatives come less frequently and I find I am able to combat them easier. It’s still not easy, but I know that God made me the way I am because He wants me to be who I am in Him, and as long as I focus on being who He made me to be, I know I’m moving in the right direction and can have confidence in Him. I have also found that the better we feel about ourselves on the inside, the better we look on the outside! If we are dreary and let down inside, that’s what will show on the outside as well! If we want to be beautiful on the outside, we have to be beautiful on the inside, and that comes from the love that He gives us and our accepting of that love! I am thankful for Him and that I can rest in knowing I am His, and that’s what really matters!
Inside chatter has been a lifelong battle for me. I have learned over the years that I need to take those thoughts captive, pause, think about what the real issue is behind that thought, and say a quick prayer. I still struggle but I’m making imperfect progress!
I know everything you’ve said about that “inside chatter” – – but even when I pray and beseech God to help me – – it’s still there. There is no one in my life that I can talk to. My husband scolds me when I try to share my sadness. I have always moved around a lot – – changing communities. The 2 times when we stayed for awhile, all the women close to me moved away. Even attending church and women’s Bible study is empty – – I see those people when I attend these functions, but there is no relationship. I’m looking for a church with deep, heart-felt worship. There aren’t any here and no one seems to know what I’m talking about. I made a heart-to-heart connection last spring – – but after 5 months, she moved away. I’m left alone – – with the voices. I look confident and “together” – – the woundedness of my heart doesn’t show on the outside. I’ve been a good friend – – but I can’t find one.
Wow, never though of it this way. Putting my whole identity into the “smallness of the situation”. Sounds silly now, but been battling the neg inside “don’t measure up, not liked, or not picked” condemnation my whole life. Really silly (if it didn’t hurt) in light of the fullness I have in Christ. How awesome! I need to swim in that more today. Thank you, Lysa.
I have four granddaughters and they are all twelve years old right now. I remember feeling “not chosen” growing up and my prayer and heart’s desire is for them to see themselves through God’s eyes not through the “smallness” of events that will inevitably happen.
Inside Chatter stinks.
Ahhh, inside chatter! It can be quite debilitating. I cannot tell you how many times I hear my dad and brother’s mean teasing about my thighs and butt, my weight loss attempts, and my attempts as a 12 year old preteen to apply makeup and style my hair. They were very mean comments. It took me years to get over many of those comments – to shut them down in my mind – long after the comments stopped because I moved away. Sometimes I still have to “cast down every negative thought” when my dad’s voice creeps back into my head. I am thankful that the Lord and some great mentors have taught me how to combat those thoughts with the word and truth. I am also careful with my own words to my daughters when they were growing up. Knowing how much pain my parents caused me, helped me to work very hard not to repeat the same mistakes. I wasn’t perfect – I know I made mistakes – but I think for the most part, I didn’t repeat many of the mistakes my parents made.
Another thing I have learned is that the comments my father and brother made, were not an excuse for me to give up, apply blame, or stay stuck in an unhealthy situation. Like Lysa said, the situatin cannot define me. At some point in our life, we have to realize that only we can control our mind an only we can give power to another person’s negativity. So I choose not to give power to their words.
My inside chatter for many years said I was a failure. I could not accomplish anything, yet when you look at where I was in life I had accomplished so much my material and outside standards. Yet I felt so very empty. I have come to realize that my significance comes from God’s choice to create me. I am insignificant compared to God, but so very significant to him.
I recently went through a horrible divorce after my husband had an affair with a much younger woman and decided he didn’t want to work on our 10 year marriage. I had 3 kids in 22 months (1 + twins), a full time outside the home job and a father dying of lung cancer. I suppose my husband was not top on my list during this time very difficult & demanding time. Although I know that what he did was wrong, I struggle daily with the inside chatter saying “I should’ve, would’ve, could’ve. Would things be different if I had been a different wife? Looking forward to the webcast!
Thank you for your post today. Reading your words stung a little, remembering how many times I was left out of activities. Never did feel like I was good enough to be around the “cool” people. I built my identity on how I thought others viewed me! Working on getting rid of the negative chatter!
Great post Lysa. I have to confess that I have a PhD on inside negative chatter. For a large majority of my life I did put the whole of my identity into the smallness of the given situation. It would break my heart and leaving me feeling so rejected, hurt and empty inside. I still struggle today with inside chatter but I do not allow it to be all consuming of me and I often have to remind myself that it is Christ in me and that my identity is found in Him. Not only is my identity in Christ I need to also remember to be free to by the real me and not what others think I should be. I also have to remind myself that I need to step back and view a situation through the eyes of others. They have a reason for why they have done what they have in a given situation. It could be they are hurting for whatever reason, feeling rejected or just really didn’t think something was as big a deal as I do. I have to remember there is a reason for everything and that maybe God didn’t want me to be in a certain situation and that was His way of protecting me from something far greater than the small pain I am feeling from a hurt or rejection.
“Inside chatter” gets in the way of us benefitting the glorious forgiveness of the Lord. Take for example, when we have sinned, one that weighs heavy on our heart, we are blessed to be able to go to God in prayer and repent and ask forgiveness and strive not to repeat. Ta-Da He forgives us and continues to love us. But then that inside chatter pops up now and then and we need to give it a thump right back in our forgiven pile.
How great is our Lord!!!
I have struggled all my life with inside chatter, but have found God is the source to go to in order to turn it off and to make the wrong thoughts turn to His reality and what He says about me. Listening to satan’s lies only makes our self-worth and identity shift with what the culture says about us. Focusing on our Heavenly Father keeps us grounded in our true identity. Just last night our 22 year old son came to us indicating that he has been struggling with depression and fighting with spiritual oppression with his identity. With much prayer from grounded prayer warrior friends, He is finding God’s peace again and not stuffing these feelings. He knows God’s truth about Him. What a praise. It is so important that we learn to look to God, praying without ceasing, our one and only true source of Life and Light to get through this chaotic world, to guard our minds and take captive our thoughts and to reach out to our family and friends when we see them struggle.
Sweet Blessings for your awesome ministry, Lysa.
It is so hard to feel left out. For many years, I’ve struggled with that and honestly, have avoided deep friendships for fear of feeling that again! The inside chatter is always an issue. The only thing I can do to counteract it is pray and read God’s word – the truth! Thanks for this giveaway!
I find that Satan’s lies come most often when a ministry opportunity comes along. All of a sudden, thoughts like “You can’t do that! You are not capable of that – who are you kidding?” fill my mind. When these thoughts (lies) come along I have found the best way to face them is to tell Satan to shut up and leave. I then ask the Holy Spirit to speak to me loudly – as His voice is the one I want to hear and am listening for.
It’s funny…I’m 50 and had this very thing happen last week. I have started a job at a new company. I’m have a lifetime of experience in my field and I’m very good at what I do. However, I’ve had a hard time breaking into the social circle at my organization. In the past, having been the center of the circle socially, it’s been hard on my heart and led to a lot of negative self talk. Because God is with me and part of my every day I rest in Him and not take this as the fact that I’m not measuring up. This was a great blog post. and timely..thanks Lysa!
I’ve been working in the recovery ministry at my church for about 2 years now and this is an issue that we discuss fairly often. I am no where near an expert on the subject but I have learned quite a bit from my girls lives and from my own experiences as well. I’ve learned that we all have a “committee” in our heads, voices that speak in a certain persons place. Ex: Mother, brother,friend, enemy, high school coach, ex boyfriend, etc. And when situations arise we hear a comment come from one or more of these people. I also know that our voice is the loudest out of any in our head and ultimately is the one we will always follow.
So now the question I ask myself is this: Do I agree or disagree with the positive/ negative comments? And, How can I change my “stinkin thinkin” around to a Godly p.o.v.? It’s simple, line it up with the Word. Learn what God thinks about me and all the rest is empty chatter. I have found tremendous healing from simply knowing He created me for a purpose.
I am starting to realize that the mean things I say to myself are far worse than anything any one else could say, because I know EXACTLY where I’m vulnerable! Direct hit every time!
We can control the ‘inside chatter’ and seeking God to help us with that will make us more successful. Thanks for the chance at the giveaway. God bless.
Inside chatter stinks! But what I am learning is to recognize it quicker and change my thinking!
Reading these words this morning as I struggle to get “Monday” started really made me stop and think – I listen to the inside chatter WAY too much. And not only do I listen, I let it affect my feelings of value and worth. To set the seen – I am 3 1/2 months pregnant (so prego-hormones on full alert!), have 3 other kids (8, 3, 1), and am a full-time high school teacher. So needless to say things are a tad busy…..or crazy, whichever word you prefer. My husband is very helpful, which I don’t always give him credit for, but let’s face it, he is still a guy and a lot of things that need to be done don’t even register on his “man radar”. In the middle of the craziness, when everyone is asking me for something, and my husband is being more of a “man” than I would like him to be at that moment – this is when the inside chatter starts going.
“You can’t handle this”
“This life you have is crazy – you can’t keep it all together”
“No one cares what YOU need. Everyone only cares about themselves and what YOU can do for THEM. You don’t’ matter”
It’s this last one that resonates the most. I am so busy taking care of everyone and everything – who takes care of me? Who cares what I need, or that I am about to have a mental breakdown most days? If I listen to the inside chatter – the answer that I am given is Nobody.
This ‘lie’ is exactly what Satan wants me to believe. That nobody cares about me. I have learned to recognize this, though, for what it is a big ol’ fat lie.
The Creator who made me – made me for a purpose, and loves me all the time, especially in the middle of the craziness. And, knowing that he sees me and is there to help me, gives me the peace I need to ignore the lie of the inside chatter and not let it define me. I am defined by the God who made me and gave me the life that I have and he ALWAYS cares about me – even when I have peanut butter in my hair, 3 screaming kids, and a husband who is asking what we are gonna have for dinner.
In my life, very rarely does inside chatter cultivate the truths in my life. Rather it fosters half-truths, falsehoods, self doubt, pessimism. Working on rewriting my inner dialogues!!
I have struggle with inside chatter most of my life. I had a hard time in school making friends due to having a birthmark on my face. I use to always tell myself that no one liked me because of this. I have learned since Ive grown that my birthmark is a distinct mark of myself. I tell my boys this is were God kissed me while I was in the process of being made. I struggle as an adult with this because I chose to live differently than most of the people who are around us. I know God has a purpose and plan for my family and if it means sitting in silence by myself day by day then this is what I will do! Because He says “Be still and Know that I am God”
Looking forward to the webcast. I need to remind myself who the enemy is when inside chatter starts to scream condeming thoughts. The bible tells me I am not ignorant of his schemes. I know how he works and where the battlefield is. It is so much easier said than done. I struggle not daily but more like hourly to keep my thoughts on God’s promises and truth. I am learning to trust God especially when my circumstances look the same or worse. Thank you Lysa for teaching us and listening to God’s whispering voice in your life. You are such a blessing to many.
I learned that I just can’t let my inside chatter get the best of me. It takes up too much of my time and effort!
I have dealt with negative inside chatter since becoming a teenager. I don’t know what made it begin. I’m not sure there was one defining moment but I think it was just the continuous let-downs and put-downs that occur in middle school and high school. Always feeling like the outsider, wishing to be included. Those thoughts still haunt me today at 45….if my husband points out a negative characteristic that I have or a talent that I do NOT have…here they go again. I hear the same old “your not good enough” voices. Over the past year, I have been trying something new to work on this. When the negative chatter starts, I say to myself “YOU ARE A CHILD OF GOD”….. “HE MADE YOU PERFECT IN HIS SIGHT TO ACCOMPLISH HIS PLAN FOR YOU”….it doesn’t make it completely go away but it has gotten better.
I have a certain person in my life that always seems to cause this “inside chatter”. I find as adult women the chatter is more often and worse than when I was a teenager. However right at the end of 2012 our Pastor spoke about starting a new fresh year and said “Stop the insanity”. From that point on I do not allow or stop the chatter before it starts.
what I’ve learned about “Inside Chatter” in my life: that it is not helpful or constructive in any way, shape or form, that it’s often emotion-based & therefore would not hold up in court & should be thrown out of my mind…and then I pray that God will help me to remember who I am in His eyes & help me to become who He longs for me to be.
I have fought the ‘inner-thought’ life a long time. I have always heard to ‘take captive the thoughts’ but I have not been able to really get a grasp on it. Sometimes I say things to myself so much, that it is hard to ‘reprogram’ my brain to know they are not true.
Working to fill my thoughts and life with positive thoughts- God’s word- and to be able to quickly change my emotions and not allow them to control me or my thoughts. Thank you for your insights on making “imperfect progress”. Love it!
Inside chatter is something I have battled with since childhood. I was always the one left out for parties or at recess. I have dealt with the feelings of I am not wanted or good enough. These thoughts are a daily struggle for me. I know it is Satan trying to get in my head and lead me away, but sometimes I just listen and isolate myself from everyone!
God’s timing is amazing!! I am 56 years old and currently working with someone to understand what in my past has led me to have such negative thoughts about myself when I know deep down I am created in His image and He has saved me!! I am so thankful to you for sharing this webcast with all who feel as worthless and alone as I do. Thank you.
The inside chatter is a constant struggle! I sometimes hear the hurtful things that people said about me 30 yrs ago and it still hurts. Need to let go and forgive. Looking forward to the webcast.
I’m learning…to keep my eyes & ears on Jesus…HIS TRUTH sets me free from the fear & lack of peace that comes with the untruths told to by me to me.
I have the worst internal chatter. It is a constant daily battle of my mind and I am always working hard to change it. To remember God’s promises. To repeat scripture and BELIEVE it. I still struggle with not being picked or included, whether it’s at church or online with the Christian bloggers. It’s tough to put your heart out there…
“Inside chatter” to me equals satan’s lies also…Replace it with God’s word.. its how I mute the chatter.
Ugh…. I have too much inside chatter going on!! And I feel like I let it have reign over my emotions far more than I would like to admit. 🙁 THanks for this post and the reminder that I need to rely on God’s Word and how God sees me over the chatter in my head.
Great article. I’ve struggled over the years with this myself, and have to often remind myself to ignore the negative chatter. I’m now trying to teach my ten year old daughter about this too, because she also struggles. She mishears comments many people make and replaces what they said with the chatter in her brain. A teacher might give her constructive criticism, and she hears that she is stupid. It’s a hard cycle to break. I remind her that’s not what the teacher said. It’s what the negative talk in her mind hears but it’s not truth.
First off, I have a HUGE problem with the inside chatter. But God is showing me WHO I am in Him. not what the world says, not what the enemy says, not the temporary rejection of a friend who is busy, but strictly what He says about me. I go back to that truth every time the lies start coming. Theres a song that helps that, by Sandi Patty, called You Call Me Yours. The chorus says “You call me beautiful, you call me righteous, you call me worthy of your Sons own precious blood. You call me Holy, you call me strong at my weakest, forgiven and pure, you call me Yours.” And thats the truth I hold tight to. My friend and I have adopted a saying to hold us accountable: STAND FIRM! stand firm against the enemy, confident the Lord fights for us, owns us, loves us, and we are precious to Him. And if I am precious to Him, no one elses opinion matters! People didnt die for me – Christ did!
will look up that song now. Thanks for posting, Becky, it was very encouraging 🙂
I have learned that the chatter in my head is easy to believe, but most of it is not true. I have to replace it with the right thoughts and with God’s Word. I’m comforted to know that I am not alone in this struggle!
Lysa, sometimes I would swear you’re reading my diary! I could’ve written this post! Wow!!
I have learned that inside chatter is often from the enemy. He whispers lies to us to pull us away from our Father. It can be a great struggle to ignore him, to kick him to the curb, but we have to learn that he is the father of lies.
I wrestle with confidence and second guessing. Constantly praying that my words will be measured in truth and purpose. I often ‘hear’ the negativity over what God is trying to whisper to my heart. I’m getting better and my relationships with my children and my husband continue to prosper.
Inside chatter (for me) is discouraging, self defeating, and hurtful thoughts running through my mind. Inside chatter can turn something into any thing else; always something bigger, something more harmful.
Inside chatter instigates quarrels. It can turn my husband washing dishes to help out into he’s washing dishes because I took too long to get them done because I’m lazy!!
As Christians we who have the mind of Christ are called to think on what is lovely and pure, and right and true (Phil 4:8). We are to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Rom 12:2)! To bring our thoughts into the obedience of Christ (2Cor 10:4-5)!
That ugly, impure, inside chatter more often than not bears the fruit of the flesh (Gal 5:19-21)
We have to recognize and acknowledge that if our inside chatter isn’t bearing fruit, if what we are believing are lies then they are of the enemy who is the father of lies!
The Bible says that we glorify God by bearing fruit (much fruit) How can we bear much fruit and glorify God unless we are diligent in abiding? We have to keep our eyes on Jesus, we have to walk by the Spirit, we have to die daily and submit to God.
Honestly, I am a “people pleaser”. I hate it when people don’t like me. Negative chatter has affected me often in the past, but I am learning when it starts to remind myself about the TRUTH. I am what God says I am and not what the world says. I am always accepted by Him, even if no one would accept me in this world! Thanks for the reminder!
I’ve learned that I CHOOSE what chatter goes on in my mind….And I can in turn choose only positive things accompanied by truth learned by reading His word! 😉
I am one who is in a constant state of inward chatter. 🙁 I worry that I said/did the wrong thing. I worry that I looked stupid. I HAVE to keep that inward chatter at bay. I realize that I am defeating work in me and others that God wants to do because I am letting doubt and worry creep in and inhibit what God wants to do through and to me. When the chatter begins in my mind, I quickly work to chatter about other times I have been in similar situations and how God was able to work because I STOPPED that unfruitful chatter.
The Bible tells us to be anxious about nothing! It is actually a tough choice! But I choose to allow God to work in me and through me… not my mindless chatter!
I’ve learned that I CHOOSE what chatter goes on in my mind….And I can in turn choose only positive things accompanied by truth learned by reading His word!
There always seems to be inside chatter going on in my head b/c I am always over analyzing situations and conversations. My self esteem takes a whoopin’ when I base my worth on what people do or don’t do. Right now I’m in the process of leading a sm group through my church using your book unglued and I’m so anxious that only 1 or maybe no people will show up. I loved your book and want to pass on all the wisdom you give in it. However my inside chatter (satan) is telling me I can’t leada small group.I don’t know enough scripture, I talk too much, I speak too loudly and I’m very high energy. I could go on and on but you get the point. I have learned to ignore the negative chatter and keep walking on the path I believe God has led me on. Satan wants me to stop and turn around but I won’t b/c God is going to lead women to this sm group and we’re going to learn to be calm in the chaos together.
Can’t wait for the webcast. I fight the negative voices in my head. I know where they come from, but sometimes they are so loud and convincing.
I’m 30 and I still deal with low self-esteem. Thinking negatively about myself has always been a big problem for me. As a New Year resolution I promised my self no more negative talk.
I remember that inside chatter so clearly from my younger years. How damaging it can be! Its so hard to overcome as an adult.
Inside chatter is and can be the work of the evil one, I am convinced..Inside chatter does more harm to my spirit than anything else. That’s when I do not trust God to do what He has set out to do in my life. Where am I in all of this? How do I stop the chatter, the negative talk and the thoughts that minimize my potential? I think it happens when I soak into the truths in the Bible, turn my thoughts into HIS thoughts.. and they are not negative.. that’s for sure..
As women we tend to believe the bad stuff about ourselves….it’s easier. We form our self image on what our culture teaches us so if we don’t measure up to be that beautiful person we are shown, then we automatically see ourselves as flawed and trade the truth for the negative. I have a favorite quote I heard some time ago that I remind myself very often and share with women I mentor and that is this, “you must talk to yourself more than you listen to yourself.” If you listen to yourself, this is the inside chatter that goes on in our minds that we have internalized about ourselves or our situations that may have been formed by culture, upbringing, others, etc.. The truth is, God has very clearly set forth in His word that if we are His, we are wholly loved, fully forgiven, a child of the King, and have everything we need in Him! These are the things we need to be telling ourselves on a daily basis if need be rather than listening to ourselves. The bible calls this renewing of your mind. Romans 12:1-2 are two of my life verses and how I have found victory in talking to myself more than listening to myself. Sadly because I believe we have a very poor understanding of who God is and who we are to Him, we then only have the world or our flesh to shape our self image. This battle will be won by drawing near to God, knowing Him and hiding His word in our heart. Then, the negative inside chatter will be replaced with truth and the joy of knowing who we are in Him will set our minds free indeed!
Inside chatter starts from the moment I open my eyes in the morning until I shut them at night. I’ve come to learn that we (women) are a lot tougher on ourselves than what is true in reality. I’ve struggled to discern the difference between the Holy Spirit prodding me to learn and better myself…and what is just silly talk that wears me down and aims to darken my day. There is a difference. And I’m learning day-by-day. Thanks for bringing this topic up for discussion, Lysa!
I have learned that these “whispers” can try to define who you are and make you act like a total different person that who you know you were made to be. Its’ really like having the people sitting on each shoulder lol. You have to knock the “whispering” (DEVIL) side off and listen to what Jesus says about you!!
I have struggled my entire life with inside chatter. It has resulted in an eating disorder, bad relationships, major mess-ups, tons of regret, and low self-esteem. Just last night I had a heart to heart with my 11 year old and my heart broke when he confessed the same things I feel. I prayed last night and today for God to show me how to help my son when I don’t even know how to “fix” this in my own life. This was an answer to prayer and I WILL be tuning in tomorrow. Thank you!
Years ago as a new believer a spiritual mentor told me when negative thoughts haunt a person they are NOT from our Father. That revelation has helped me catch myself when inside chatter has me spiraling downward – God gently guides us, lovingly teaches us lessons through the Holy Spirit; He does not inspire us to loath ourselves! When inside chatter tries to get a hold of my heart though my mind, I must recognize then acknowledge what is happening, once alerted I cling to the Truth: I am a child of God who can trust in His grace, acceptance, forgiveness, protection, promises, and His perfect Love!
I have never had alot of self-esteem/confidence. But my teenage years were really bad. I remember one day a popular girl at school actually said hi to me and called me by my name. That made me feel so good. I decided later in life that I was a good person and if people couldn’t see that then that was their problem. I just pray that I can teach my kids that not everyone is going to like you and be nice to you, but that they should always treat people with kindness and respect and always treat them the way that they want to be treated. Loved you on KLOVE last week.
“Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation.”
I am going to write that down and post it where I can see it EVERY day. I have never been part of the “in” crowd and being a young parent with three small children while the majority of mine and my husbands friends are all still single is hard! There are so many times that we get left out because people assume we can’t participate because of the kids. Even at church, it’s hard to fit in the the groups we “should” because there is such an age difference in us and the people we have the most in common with. It’s taken several years for me to feel comfortable being the youngest by many years in a room with people that have kids the same age as mine. Sometimes the devil gets in my head and tries to make me feel alienated from everyone because God has given me a unique life…a life that has a purpose and a plan. It’s easy to become discouraged and lonely but I try to remember that God made me the way that I am and gave me the life that He planned for me. I shouldn’t feel left out of anything, when He could be protecting me. I shouldn’t feel “less” of anything, when He made me to fit perfectly into His plan.
I love this post. I spoke straight to my heart!
Tiffany, Daniesville GA
Good word to plant in my soul! Thank you!
I obsess over the inside chatter – the woulda, coulda, shoulda’s. These seeds of self doubt creep up all the time and leave me with anxiety and feelings of inadequacy.
Ugghhh…”inside chatter” is something that I’ve REALLY been struggling a lot with the past couple of weeks and it’s amazing how crippling it is and how badly it effects my mood and actions. The Lord & I have been having some chats about it and I’m trying really hard to take every thought captive. Sometimes I wish I could just shut my mind off but I’m learning that when I start going down the road of listening to the inside chatter, I need to stop and ask the Lord to show me truth and redirect my thoughts to things that are true and loving and not made up craziness! <3
I’ve learned that the inside chatter is louder than anything anyone has to has – perhaps because I’m nearer to it. It also hurts the most. In order to combat negative inner chatter, I sometimes speak aloud to myself and combat that voice with things I know God has said about me.
My inside chatter tells me that I’m not good enough. Christian enough. Liked enough. When I am not invited to events, this chatter gets louder and confirmed. I try to remind myself to not take it personally – they probably did not intentionally exclude me. And even if they did, their approval and acceptance are not what I should look for – Christ’s is!
It always seems that the “inside chatter” is the way Satan uses to distract me from the voice I need to listen too. When God starts speaking, Satan attacks full steam- which is usually through my low self esteem. I will feel like I am moving forward and following God whole heartedly, then I will get one comment…. Usually from a family member, and I shrink, start listening to all the old “chatter” that I am not good enough, nor will I ever be enough to complete what God is calling me too. It is a major battle, as I get older I am stronger in my Faith and I know that “with God nothing is impossible”, even when battling myself!!!
I have the worst inside chatter. I am always so negative. Very rarely do I say much of anything positive in my inside chatter. I long to change this! I pray the Lord will help me and show me ways to change my inside chatter.
I’m a new college student, newly wed last year and have finally started getting more involved with my church. My husband and I have become good friends with a couple that have been very supportive. My friend, Jenna, has helped me through the book Unglued because I’ve always had a hard time channeling the negative. After reading your book I’ve come to know that “I can’t control what happens to me everyday, but I can control how I feel about them.” Living by your quote, I’ve learned to take all that negative inside chatter and use it for something more productive, like time spent talking to God. My favorite thing to do is talk to Him when I’m driving alone, as if He were my passenger. I’ll talk to Him about everything, including why my husband does some of the things he does :). Through your book I’ve learned that I am a daughter of the King and, although it still happens from time to time (hey, I’m human) if I’m living for Him, I don’t have the time to “lose my cool” I simply have to turn to Him and He’ll show me what to do. Living by His grace had really helped my marriage and walk with the Lord.
What have I learned… Several years ago my husband and I moved because he got a job in another state. A few weeks after the move I found out I was pregnant. We planned the move but a new job, new house, moving and then finding out we were to be parents was enough to put my husband over the edge. He found an old girlfriend and decided he wanted her instead of our family. It was pure hell. I had lots of chatter in my head and out from people giving me advice. If I would have listened to them I would have done what I always thought I would… castrate him and wave goodbye… Thankfully I didn’t listen to myself or some of those around me. I prayed and had one set of friends that gave me Godly council. God is in control. Read and pray scriptures that show you that YOU ARE GODS creature and HE HAS A PLAN. It may not be your plan but this is NOT a surprise to Him. Trust Him. And when I closed out my thoughts and the thoughts of those who were talking in secular perspective I found that my inner chatter would dissolve. BUT I had to work at keeping the godly chatter going IN to make sure the other chatter stayed out. Praise God that my husband repented and we are now 6 years after that mess doing very well. That lesson taught me how important what is going in affects what happens inside and comes out. If you stop putting in the good chatter you will never be able to combat the chatter from within.
Like many others, I have let inside chatter control me to the point that I decide what someone else is thinking about given situation. It’s not fair s since I wouldn’t want people deciding how I think. Why do I do that?! Our small group is currently studying Soul Detox and it had a section on this but I need a whole lesson JUST on this alone!
I have learned that when I neglect time in the word & with God my inside chatter is lethal. When I do fill my spirit and get in His presence, the chatter still comes but it is powerless against all the word I have to cast it down. For me, time with God on a daily bases is the ONLY way I survive the inside chatter
Inside Chatter – I think the negativity of it plagues every woman – more than anyone wants to admit. I have battled this my whole life. I am adopted. Even though I have wonderful parents, the constant “chatter” in my head of “You were a mistake….no one wanted you…you should never have been born.”….goes on so much and a lot of the time I am not even aware that it is. I got told I was “fat” and “ugly” when I was in school….that “chatter” goes on in my head as well….as I hear those voices and I am agreeing with them. I am praying and trying to replace that “chatter” with the Word of God. It is a daily battle. Help me God!
Negative inside chatter has been an issue for me my whole life. if someone close to me (kids, husband, neighbors, co-workers, family) speaks (or does not speak) to me in a way that tells me something is bothering them, i immediately think it must be something I have done or not done. Somehow I have convinced myself that I am responsible for their happiness and therefore I have failed the relationship in some way.Then I backoff/retreat until it passes. But i end up feeling like I am not sufficient/not worthy. Completely irratational! I have gotten better about this by remembering “i am fearfully and wonderfully made”. I remember I am a child of God and He will use me to bless those around me.
Its amazing to me that when we allow God to lead us where we end up. Making changes in my life and working on allow God to be my everything and my everything about God I have not been sure where to start in some areas and A good friend promoted this on her facebook wall and now I have an answer, and Im so exicted to be able to enjoy this tomrrow and cant wait to see how its gonna affect my stuggles in my walk with Christ… Have a great day!!
I learned a long time ago that listening to inside chatter will make me a crazy person! So I try to disconnect myself from it, witness it as separate from me, and remind myself who GOD says I am.
I think as women we all deal with that inside negative chatter. I have learned through rejection and “not being included’ that in the end I WILL be included at CHRIST’S table. And that I am HIS daughter. So when that negative stuff begins in my head, I keep my eyes on HIM and the PRIZE waiting for me at the finish line! The Bible tells us we will be rejected and hurt by it, but our JOY should be only in HIM! Thanks so much Lisa for your post!!
I have learned to tell the negative chatter to hush and read a devotional or scripture to align my mind and thoughts on where they should be.
The only way I calm the inside chatter is with God’s word …its my mute button.
I believe everyone goes through episodes of this in life, and it is how you handle those episodes that determines how you will respond. However, growing maturity in the Lord gives you a better perspective!! I know there have been times when someone has felt like I was the one who initiated the,..,”she didn’t pick me” feeling, or the “I am not liked by her” feeling, when this was absolutely not the case, just a matter of human forgetfulness or a total misunderstanding So many times, there are explanations for these types of things. However, it can cause deep wounds. I have found that there are so many verses that speak of His love for us and what we are to Him, which matters so much more in this short lifetime on earth. He can also lift those feelings of doubt and fear away. Thank you Lysa for being real about so many issues! You keep me going!!!
Wow, what a grip inside chatter has played into my life! It tears not only me down, but everyone around me down too. It has caused rifts and anger, resentments and unnecessary unhappiness. I often don’t catch it soon enough, and then I blow up and find that what I’ve been telling myself is completely untrue or it’s true but inflatated to a point where it’s unhealthy. I really hate it, and have prayed time and time again to be free of it, but I still struggle. The strugge leave me feeling even more awful myself than I originally felt. It has put a tremendous strain on my marriage too. It’s a daily struggle, one I would like to break free of forever. My insecurites always seem to get the best of me, and being brought up in a home that negativity was a fluent language definitely has compounded this issue ten fold. I’m looking forward to hearing the webcast, I really think this could help in giving me some more tools in how to handle my inside chatter. I haven’t read any of your books yet, but I have a sneaking suspicion they are right up my alley. I’ll be listening! Thank you for your posting-a girlfriend of mine recommended you, and I see why!
I have dealt with a lot of negative chatter that comes from within! Low self esteem, no self confidence etc… I know it’s Satan feeding me a lot of bad thoughts, but it is so hard to overcome!!
I have always had issues with inside chatter. This was just what I needed today!!!! Thank you so much for all that you are doing. We just started UNGLUED at our church last night with 16 precious women!!!!!!! God is at work!!!!!!!!
I have learned that it can pick me up or tear me down. I’ve been working towards building myself up and rebuking the negative thoughts.
I also realize that my demeanor takes on my thought patterns and can affect those around me (especially my children) so I really try to focus on the good. When I can’t, I take the time to pray and speak with my husband.
Love your products!
I’ve dealt with “negative chatter” for as long as I can remember. I lived with a father that I could never really please, and those constant feelings of inadequacy have carried with me all of my life. I’m constantly comparing, constantly telling myself you are not good enough, you have nothing to offer, there is nothing special about you. Everyday is a war in my mind-battling those negative thoughts. God has reminded me through His word that I am loved, I am cherished, and that Jesus laid down his life for ME. It’s those reminders that help me combat the sometimes minute by minute battle I have over my thoughts.
Inside Chatter is dangerous. I think women are especially vulnerable to it. We’re so hard on ourselves already and we face so much outward negativity (media, etc.) So many of us are constantly comparing ourselves to others and thus, deriving our self worth (or lack thereof) from how we feel we measure up to someone else, whether it be a mom from school or a mom on TV. We need to remember that we’re beautifully and wonderfully made. God loves us and He created us for wonderful things. Things that are a gift. God doesn’t care if we gave our kids cereal and fruit for dinner or if we have cellulite. We try so hard and He knows. We need to give ourselves a break and remember that we’re pretty good people and speak that out loud!!
This topic could NOT be more applicable to my life right now! In fact I just was dealing with this all week last week and then this weekend some. I have found these sneak up a lot in moments of emotional break down or hormones have kicked in and I am by myself to my own thoughts. I really struggle with it in terms of believing lies within my relationship to my fiance and thinking he must be thinking I am not good enough or he has made a mistake in choosing someone with issues like myself. I also hear these voice in the school/work environment, I am in college right now and a senior it seems like so many other students are set on what job they will have or where they will go after college and I have yet to know. I think these little voices of our identity not being in Christ but in things of this world or through Satan are SO easy to believe and something I am SO thankful for the first you posted and being reminded that our fullness is only and can only be found in Christ!
I am so excited for this podcast and this giveaway and to learn more about this because it is deff. an area I need a lot of improvement in and want to surrender over to the Lord.
My negative inside chatter has been over guilt the last few weeks. That is just the last few weeks, there has been much more over the last four months. There have been a few of those conversations going on in my head about how I am going to let some of the things that have happened define me. Well I have come to the conclusion that they are all going to define me to a certain point, but if I hand it over to God how it defines me is going to be a lot better and a lot different then how I let it define me.
I, too, have battled inside chatter for as long as I can remember – mostly due to being obese for as long as I can remember. On the days when I feel less of a person because of my weight or because I was left out -yes, it even happens as an adult; then I, sadly, let the inside chatter gets the better of me. So I realize that I must keep God’s Word & Truth in my heart that I may remember that God says I am beautiful inside AND out. After all, I was worth dying for on the cross to Him … and that is worth far more than any human thoughts or words!
I am learning to deal with the inside chatter better now that I have children that I am trying to teach to ignore the internal negativity. As I try to help them overcome their insecurities it helps me recognize my own. There have been many family discussions about how your worth is not determined by others, but by yourself and God.
I have learnt and am continuing to learn that my inside chatter is not me but the devil trying so hard to pull me down. Yes I have giving into those thoughts to many times. The thoughts of not being good enough or being stupid or not wanted. When I notice that my onside chatter starts to go that way I quickly as say a pray that The Lord will remove them thoughts and that I realize that they are not mine and that I am stronger then the devil who puts them there. The Lord loves me and has made me who I am. I am beautiful, smart, I am wanted and most definitely good enough in the eyes of my Father!
I have learned that inside chatter is both good and bad. It can serve you when it comes from a place of peace to build yourself up. Going in the other direction it tends to narrate all of your insecurities and fears. I literally have to stop and tell myself that I will not spend my energy thinking about things that will probably not even matter in the future. We sometimes have to remind ourselves that we are good enough no matter what anyone else directly or indirectly does to make us feel otherwise. God does not make mistakes when he brings us into being. Therefore, our quirks and differences from others make us completely perfect for the journey He has made for us.
Thanks for the reminder about inside chatter. I have struggled with this for some time now and was taught how to deal with it. Your entry has reminded me how much I have strayed from this counsel. I was told to hold every thought captive… when a bad thought comes to mind recite a bible verse or pray to God. I also had note cards posted around my house (fridge, bathroom mirror… etc.) with God’s word on it… those were called my “stop” cards. Whenever a bad thought came to mind, I’d read it and stop the thought and filled my head & heart with his word. Thanks for reminded me of this… now off to find some note cards. : )
I have had to silence my own chatter for years. Most recently, just finally realizing I had to break the cycle of abusive relationships I was allowing myself in, because somehow I could never do better. I have a 4 year old daughter with my ex husband, who was abusive, but I stayed until she came. I knew then I could not allow her to grow up believing that was how she should be treated. I struggle with not becoming unglued at times during the transfers of our daughter, because he does not have her best intentions in mind. We are starting a women’s study on this at my church next week. I’m so excited!
I would love to be able to turn off or change my inside chatter that tells me I am not good enough, that I’m afraid to take that risk for fear of failure, that if only…My inside chatter is often negative and hurtful and things that I would NEVER think to speak to someone else.
Would love to win these great books and goodies!
I learned a very long time ago that the only voice I need to listen to is God’s. He keeps saying to me “Take my hand”, “I’m here for you”, “I’ll carry you all the way”, “I love you”. He is my glue.
I struggle with an inner monologue of constant accusations of my inadequacies. My poor husband has to remind me gently to STOP IT. 🙂 I am working on changing my thought patterns and look forward to webcast tomorrow night!
I wish I could join you on the web cast, however, that is the night of our Women’s Bible Study at our church! 🙁
What I’ve learned about inside chatter is that it can be dangerous and destructive if It’s the “wrong” kind of chatter. Is it from God? Is it positive? I’ve often had the thoughts of, “you’re not good enough, you can’t beat this, you’re not a very good mother”… But then God steps in to remind me who I am in Him…
Thanks for the reminder about inside chatter. I have struggled with this for some time now and was taught how to deal with it. Your entry has reminded me how much I have strayed from this counsel. I was taught to hold every thought captive… when a bad thought comes to mind recite a bible verse or pray to God. I also had note cards posted around my house (fridge, bathroom mirror… etc.) with God’s word on it… those were called my “stop” cards. Whenever a bad thought came to mind, I’d read it and stop the thought and filled my head & heart with His word. Thanks for reminding me of this… now off to find some note cards. : )
At 19 years old, inside chatter seems like a necessary and inevitable part of every day. Coming from a broken family where my father abandoned me, it’s incredibly difficult to not let the negative chatter in my head overpower the positive chatter. Every time that negative whisper in my heart begins to manipulate my inner being into believing it’s worth less than it is, I’ve trained my heart to yell out the truth so loudly that I hear silence. Once my mind becomes silent, I begin to hear the truth spoken to me: “your Daddy loves you – your Abba Daddy will never leave you.” “You are a beautiful daughter of a king.” “You are worth more than life itself, because you were bought with the blood of Christ.” It’s still difficult to tune out the negative chatter, but when you replace it with God-given truth, it can silence it for the moment.
Just finished the book unglued and the chapter on inside chatter was written just for me. If I’ve came unglued on someone, I always have negative inside chatter saying negative stuff. I’ve learned that I need to start thinking more positively about myself and not believe those lies from the inside chatter. I need to look up, read, memorize uplifting verses on who I am in Christ when I start having this. Such as I’m a new creation, I am loved, I am accepted, I am wanted etc. Thank you so much for your encouraging posts.
I have learned to do my best every single day to NOT listen to the chatter! I too have those chatterings in my head – They don’t like you or love you – you are not good enough – you are too fat – you are ugly – you don’t have any friends –
BUT, GOD is the ONE I have to focus on – JESUS LOVES ME JUST THE WAY I AM & IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT OTHERS THINK!!! I have to strive each day to be MORE like JESUS – & less like the world!!!
I have dealt with a lot of negative inside chatter!! Low self esteem, no self confidence etc… I know it’s Satan feeding me a lot of bad thoughts, but it is so hard to overcome!!
My “inner chatter” is my worst feature. I can’t seem to beat it. I have learned that I should really not put much stock in it & I try to pray it away when the negative chatter begins. I have also learned I can talk myself into or out of anything. I need to find a way to always remember that my God is bigger than any negative thoughts I may have about myself and that I am His precious child.
I too think we all deal with “Inside Chatter”, after all we are only human. For me it’s just realizing when it is happening so I can stop it!
My internal chatter is self- condemning. It is only through keeping my focus on Christ instead of myself that I can find peace and whole ness 🙂
I have had to silence my own chatter for years. Finally realizing I had to break the cycle of abusive relationships I was allowing myself in, because somehow I could never do better. I have a 4 year old daughter with my ex husband, who was abusive, but I stayed until she came. I knew then I could not allow her to grow up believing that was how she should be treated. I struggle with not becoming unglued at times during the transfers of our daughter, because he does not have her best intentions in mind. We are starting a women’s study on this at my church next week. I’m so excited!
Oh haven’t we ALL had that situation happen to us? (But if not, I’m very happy you haven’t!) But for the rest of us, whew, it hurts, makes you feel a little smaller. What I’ve learned at an early age was my worth in God’s eyes. How many times I’ve held up the situation in light of the BIGNESS of God and reminded myself that Him caring about me, matters SO much more then how another flawed human being (like myself!) makes me feel. That’s what we have to do. Hold up each and every ugly, hurtful situation to the light of God’s Word and Truth. It’s more than just words, it’s so empowering, so true, such a comfort and the source of everything I am.
I let too much negative inside chatter inside and have conversations with it. It is hard to overcome. I try to keep remembering that verse from Philippians 4:8: “Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.” Also 2 Corinthians 10: 5 – “We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ,”
My short version is joy is from the inside out.God gives us true joy and by having true joy, those moments of inside chatter are fleeting by putting faith first and having a personal relationship with the author of true joy. Thank you Jesus!
I have had to silence my own chatter for years. Finally realizing I had to break the cycle of abusive relationships I was allowing myself in, because somehow I could never do better. I have a 4 year old daughter with my ex husband, who was abusive, but I stayed until she came. I struggle with not becoming unglued at times during the transfers of our daughter, because he does not have her best intentions in mind. We are starting a women’s study on this at my church next week. I’m so excited!
I, up until recently, have battled with my own chatter. Wether it be in my marriage, friendships or family relationships, I’ve never felt “good enough” and often found my own reasons why these people shouldn’t be drawn to me. I would (and at times still do) come up with battles that I’m fighting with people in my life without them even having a clue. I know that God has blessed me with these amazing people who will always be there and will always love me regardless of the situations, but at times Satan gets in there and tells me otherwise. I’ve found comfort in The Lord and He reminds me continually that none of this is from Him. It’s comforting now to know that when I start to chatter myself into a funk, God is there to pull me out and remind me that I am loved unconditionally by Him and by the people He has provided me with as well.
I’m reading “Unglued” currently and learning so much (as usual!). Have also read “Becoming More Than A Good Bible Study Girl” and “Made To Crave” and have gleaned so much. The trick for me is those reminders to myself in actual moments of craving or unglued-ness of who I am in Christ. Of the TRUTH! It’s a real trick for me to not just react to everything/everyone around me and slow down just enough to whisper Truth to myself. Thanks for all you do and all you have shared, Miss Lysa.
Any chance of a re-broadcast? I’d love to listen but it’s 6pm in Alberta and we’re in the middle of a quick supper before kids head to kids’ club at the church??
I am learning that the chatter is often the enemy whispering his lies to me in order to distract me from my Father.
Oh how many times I have to remind myself to turn off the “chat room” in my head! How many times I have had to “block” satan from being a member of that chat room!
I want to share this with my daughter…she is only 8, but I can see she is already feeling this way. I have never thought about small hurts in my past being a “defining moment”, but I do remember being young (just barely!) and feeling like a lot of things were the end of the world, when in hindsight, they really weren’t. There will always be a sting when our feelings are hurt or we are left out, even as adults. Putting it in perspective along with the rest of our lives is the important step.
As quickly as the inside negative chatter begins I have to take a step back and discern if it is the Spirit teaching, and convicting or if it is satan trying to convince me of lies. If it does not line up with the Truth then I know it is not from the Spirit. The flesh is the old me, I have been made a new creation that is one with God because of the death, burial and ressurection of Christ! I marinate on who I am in Him!
I have had lots of inside chatter. It has gotten better since I do my best to stay in God’s word. However there are times when Satan just slips right in. I have two older sisters and we are just built different and we have different looks. I used to get yours sisters are so pretty… you don’t look anything like them. I have gotten over it mostly but sometimes those comments sneak back up. I know God made me beautiful just the way I am and I am beautiful in his eyes but that inside chatter does come up….
I have had to silence my own chatter for years. Finally realizing I had to break the cycle of abusive relationships I was allowing myself in, thinking I could never do better. I have a 4 year old daughter with my abusive ex-husband, but I stayed until she came. I struggle with not becoming unglued at times during the transfers of our daughter, because he does not have her best intentions in mind. We are starting a women’s study on this at my church next week. I’m so excited!
Thank you for this reminder. I have experienced “inside chatter” and the difference it truly makes in our women’s lives and minds and identities. I was raised with the voices of judgement and not good enough to please in my head. Only through 30 years of unconditional love from the most Godly man on Earth reminding me of our Father’s love and promise have these voices changed. I am so thankful today that I can truly be what He made me to be and not be held back by Satan’s lie!!
Thank you so much for this opportunity to hear you and Sheila speak. I love that we are all invited! I am pretty sure as women we have all heard the chatter at some time or another. Thank you for the reminder that I have been given fullness in Christ.
as i get older im realizing i can not base my perception on what i feel.my feelings are too fickle and dependant on too many things that change such as hormones,past experiences,etc. before i know it i have blown a situation all out of proportion because i was so sure i knew what the other person was thinking towards me. i can only hold onto the unfailing promise of Gods love and who i am in him.
My short version is joy is from the inside out.God gives us true joy and by having true joy, those moments of negative inside chatter are fleeting by putting faith first and having a personal relationship with the author of true joy. Thank you Jesus!
I struggle with inside chatter all the time especially since we have taken on the task of being caregivers to an elderly parent. I know God is so much bigger then my problems but I find it hard to let go and give it all to HIM.
It is unfortunate how many times we allow the inside chatter to effect the conduct of our lives.
Thank you so much for your books and ministry they have truly blessed me in countless ways.
I have learned that I always have a choice: to listen to the voice of Satan, who is the King of Liars, inside my head (the Inside Chatter), or to listen to the voice of God. Even Jesus when tempted in the wilderness had a choice to make. He could listen to the words of Satan, or He could stand on the word of God. Being able to distinguish between the voices in the moment comes easier as I remain close to the Lord. So far to go in my struggles, but this Truth always encourages me. I don’t have to believe everything I think, but rather, I can filter everything I think through the Word of God, my standard of measure. He can be my anchor and my compass in all situations if I allow Him to be, so that I resemble more of a thermostat than a thermometer.
I am looking forward to the webcast and am enjoying your Made to crave devotions through youversion! What a great package to give away!
As women I think we are all inclined to that negative inner chatter – I too believe that it is the enemy trying to pull us away from GOD. I have had many times when I am “not invited” to something… but I DO KNOW THAT I am invited to sit at CHRIST’S table and that I am HIS daughter. I take great comfort in knowing this – all of us need to keep our eyes on HIS PRIZE!!! Thanks for this post Lysa!
I’ve learned that inside chatter not only affects you on the inside, it changes who you are on the outside, too. Letting the negativity continue in your head/heart will have an effect on how you interact with others. I must not let it continue. Both for my sake and those I am around, but for my daughter… I must show her to not believe the inside chatter.
Well, It goes to figure that most of mine is wrong….but it never feels like that at the time. Go figure.
God can fill our hearts with “His chatter” and replace the negative “human” chatter we often face. When I take the time to fill my mind and heart with God’s Word the “I’m not good enough chatter” is often replaced or backed with verses to remind me what I am to Christ and who I am in Him.
Being adopted and in foster homes as a child I often felt alone and didn’t seem to fit in anywhere. Unfortunately those feelings and the negative inside chatter followed me into adulthood. I know who I am in Christ but often wonder why it’s so hard for me too accept that…I’m thankful that I have the unconditional love and acceptance from God
I’ve learned that it’s very common in women to have negative chatter. I’ve always felt alone in it but have recently had conversations with several other women who do it. It is a huge area for us to encourage each other and strengthen and build new friendships through support and being open. I pray that Good would help me to be that encourager to other women.
The thing I’ve learned about the “inside chatter”, is if you say something, even to yourself, long enough you begin to believe it so if it’s negative or positive that’s what you begin to believe and base all your choices and decisions on. My problem is still the same though-negative self talk. I know these things but for some reason am unable to overcome.
Thank you Lysa for the reminder that it is not others that define us, but our relationship with God. It is so easy to be caught up in those “defining moments” based on how they affect us at the time. We simply do not know what the other person was thinking that led to their actions or words. This is reminder that we, as women, need to hear regularly, not only to increase our ability to move past these moments, but in an effort to be more purposeful in our words and actions!
In the past my “inside chatter” was too critical & often negative. I have learned to take that negative chatter & find a POSITIVE scripture to counter it. It took some time to change the ticker tape in my mind. Often I would feel anxious, out of control, worried, scared, uncertain – I learned to play a NEW tape: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” John 14:27. I would remember – Jesus already gave me HIS peace. It is mine, I simply need to ACCEPT his offering and I am restored to PEACE. When trouble arises, I can settle myself with NEW “chatter” from the promises of God.
I have also struggled (and continue to struggle) with inside chatter since I was very young. God revealed to me that this form of self pity (along with other forms) is a sin. You see, when you put so much emphasis on yourself, whether it is good or bad, it is selfish. This inside chatter is putting your focus on yourself and taking it off of our Lord and Savior where it belongs. Psalms 10:4 says ” In his pride the wicked man does not seek Him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God.” It’s easy to think of pride as being boastful and puffed up, but the opposite is also true. Selfish pride is any thoughts that turn our focus on ourselves and away from God. Praise Him for his merciful kindness! May we continue to strive to love Him more.
I have learned that Praise is miraculous in curtailing my inside chatter …also putting up the STOP SIGN – I love that I talk back to it….and well I guess that might mean I am crazy, but it’s better than believing the wrong things that roll through the backstreets of my head sometimes!
I have found that my inside chatter is just that..mine. No one thinks about me the thoughts I think about myself. The few times that I confide in people my fears or thoughts, they encourage me that it isn’t true. I try to focus on the good and keep the negative out, it is a daily process. Encouraging scriptures make the difference on rough days.
What I’ve learned from my inside chatter is it always comes when there is a decision to be made. Whether it has to do with eating dessert, helping a stranger, in my job, making life changes. It always says, “You’ll never change, you’re always going to be like this. This is your life, so go ahead, that decision won’t make a difference.” Most of the time it wins. I felt very confident after reading Made to Crave, but I slowly slid back down to my corner. I believe every woman has a story about their own inside chatter, it’s something we all struggle with. What we need to do, is recognize when it happens, tell ourselves the Truth of what God speaks over us, and keep goin’. Easier said than done.
I work with teenagers, and lately have been realizing that the same stuff I teach my girls about inside chatter is what I need to be telling myself as well. If we tell ourselves something often enough, we start to believe it. I am God’s precious creation, made uniquely to be who I am – and so is every other person around me! I need to talk to myself the same way I want my teens to be able to talk to themselves – as a wonderfully made child of God!
I continually try to remind myself why does “inside chatter” matter??? It doesn’t! It has nothing to do with serving The Lord so that usually turns my negative thought patterns around!!
I have learned that inside chatter has to be replaced with the truth of God’s word in order to stop the cycle. Sometimes it’s a minute by minute struggle for me, but I have to make an effort to “take every thought captive” and hold it up to the truth of God’s word. Also, I have found the sooner I recgnize the “chatter” and replace it with God’s truth, the better off I am.
Oh, Lysa, I needed this post today and everyday! I’m looking forward to listening to tomorrow’s webcast. At the age of 57, I’m blessed beyond measure. A widow, I’m a cancer survivor and in good health currently. November 2012 saw the release of my first book. I have a great job. You would think the negative chatter would go away. It is still there – every single day. It goes something like this: “You’re fat, therefore unattractive to men.” (Not true. I’ve been told I’m an attractive woman by men and women.) “You will never ‘make it’ with your writing. Who would want to read it? It will never be a movie.” I fight it every single day. I WILL make it as an author and my book WILL be a movie – if God is willing. Lysa and Sheila – the most wonderful trait the two of you posses is this: Complete honesty with your audience. That means more to me than anything else. Lysa, you share your family happenings. Sheila, I watched you share your financial situation at a WOF event in St. Louis. Real, honest, in-your-face sharing from both of you. What we all need in today’s world. God bless you both!
Being a stander I hear inside chatter a lot. ” Your marriage ois not going to work.” ” Your husbands wants the OW NOT you.” ” He left you and your kids for someone fun and young and exciting.” I hear it all. BUT what the enemy does not know is God loves my marriage far more than I do and He hates divorce so I just say the name of Jesus over and over I declare the word of God and let the eenemy know he is NOT taking my marriage and my family!!!!
I have also struggled (and continue to struggle) with inside chatter since I was very young. God revealed to me that this form of self pity (along with other forms) is a sin. You see, when you put so much emphasis on yourself, whether it is good or bad, it is selfish. This inside chatter is putting your focus on yourself and taking it off of our Lord and Savior where it belongs. Psalms 10:4 says In his pride the wicked man does not seek Him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God. It’s easy to think of pride as being boastful and puffed up, but the opposite is also true. Selfish pride is any thoughts that turn our focus on ourselves and away from God. Praise Him for his merciful kindness! May we continue to strive to love Him more.
I’ve discovered that “inside chatter” doesn’t define who I am in Christ. Satan will always bombard us with negative thoughts, but it’s up to us to take those thoughts captive and allow the Holy Spirit to fill us up to brimming ~ the bad overflows out of our hearts as the good fills us up.
This is so helpful for me as I deal with my teenaged daughter. She is struggling through that ‘acceptance’ stage …. middle school girls can be so mean. Thank you Lysa for your encouragement every day!
I haven’t really been dealing with inside chatter, because anytime Satan tries to trick me and lie to me, i have been learning to discern and have clarity and tell him to get behind me! God has been giving me opportunities to speak to my sister in law, last night actually. She is a very young single mother of two who struggles with wanting to be able to be a child herself because she had her first baby while she was still a child. She has never really known or been shown love by her mother so she has lots of inside chatter repeating the horrible things she has heard all her life “you’re worthless, ugly, fat etc” 🙁 I just tell her that God doesn’t say these things to us. God tells us he loves us and we are beautiful and worthy! I love her so much and if I win I will share these awesome books and devotionals with her.
I have learned that over the years I have recorded negative messages in my mind. If I’m not careful to catch them playing over and over and replace them with a truth message, I will believe the negative message and react. Only to realize it was a big fat lie!
This was such a great post, I remember “inside Chatter” in school days and caring so much to be included and what others thought etc…as I grow and definitely more so in the Lord, thoughts of what others think and say are not as important, although there is still inside chatter and basically choosing to not focus on those small situations that are insignificant as compared to the overall picture of what God says about me, how HE accepts me and loves and has chosen me! I love your blog/OBS and books! cant wait for the webcast tomorrow! 🙂 thank you for your ministry!
I do this a LOT. The other day, I caught myself doing it and then asked myself, “who in the world are you talking to?” I had completely lost focus on the activity at hand. And most of the time, the “chatter” IS negative. I really, REALLY need to stop – what does it accomplish other than reinforcing those negative thoughts & ideas?
Wow not really sure where to start with this other than – my inside chatter really disturbs me. I have read your book Unglued and am reading the Unglued Devotional now. I gave my book to a friend so she can have the blessing of reading it. I have struggled with inside chatter or should I say satan’s quite lies most of my life. He has always told me that I have not been and never will be good enough for any thing. I hit absolute rock bottom 3 1/2 years ago. Satan’s lies had finally got the best of me. I had been following his lies about my husband and finances and myself for 5 years. I got in trouble financially with my job and was found out and satans advice was to take myself out of the situation. Inside my head he kept telling me, of course your kids and husband will miss you, but they will get over it – time heals – you don’t want to drag them through the media or court system so this is the perfect answer for you go ahead its ok. I tried to kill myself. Without going into any further details by all rights I should not be here typing this comment BUT GOD stepped in and said I AM NOT DONE WITH YOU YET!!! It was a spiritual battle – and sometimes still is. I am thankful that I am still here with my family. Lets be real I still have LOTS of Unglued moments especialy when things don’t go my way or when things are not done the way I think they should be, (and of course the inside chatter starts) so I have to literally stop right then and there and give it all over to God to take care of and deal with. Sometimes that happens after I have made a total BOOB of myself. The best thing about that is, you can always start over and when that inside chatter starts, I know all I have to do is call upon the Lord and He will cover me with His Peace!!
I have been fighting the inside chatter my whole life it seems. The negative whispers into my ear and heart have lied to me too many times. I have made unhealthly choices in my life based on that negative chatter. Raising three teen girls I do not want them plagued by the same tactics that the enemy used on me. I want to teach my girls to turn off the negative chatter. I want them to live in truth. I am excited about the webcast.
Growing up I was always told how worthless I was by my “preacher” step-father. The verbal and physical abuse was constant. Those words and actions have followed me all my life. That is until I found my real Father’s amazing saving grace. Even though I know I’m someone special in HIS eyes, those words and memories still haunt me today. The awesome thing now is that they’re just bad memories and when the chatter starts I have positive thoughts and prayers to replace them. I almost always have a song floating around in my head and thanks to K-Love it’s a positive song that I can use to drown out those negative thoughts and feelings. The song sometimes escapes and my patients and families in ICU get a little positive tune too!
I can absolutely say without a doubt that the inside chatter is what has been most detrimental to anything I’ve ever tried to accomplish. I would often talk about myself much worse than anyone else did. I’d never say anything positive about myself, what I looked like, and I’d struggle with receiving compliments. I always felt like everyone else lied to me, but I told myself the truth. Unfortunately, it had gotten to the point of affecting the relationship between my husband and I. Also, my oldest daughter was beginning to pick up some of those habits and words.
I began seeking the help of a Christian counselor, studying God’s Word more intently, and asked my husband to pray for me each time he thought about it. It has been an uphill battle, but I am in the process of retraining my thoughts and desperately trying to learn to see myself as God sees me, not how the enemy wants me to see myself.
As an undergraduate student, I feel like I’m surrounded by situations that seem to welcome negative “inside chatter.” At times, it almost feels like a challenge between my heart and what those thoughts are telling me. However, the more involved I’ve become in my church – specifically through my small group especially – I’ve learned to ignore the negativity.
I’m learning to realize that I have been put on this earth for a purpose and no matter how many times the thoughts “you’re not as smart as everyone else in your major,” or you “won’t find someone who’ll accept you for you,” creep in, I’m reminded of the promises Christ as made to me through His word. I am loved by Him and I couldn’t ask for anything else to help combat those thoughts.
The “inside chatter” can try to bring me down, but I’m going to continue to wake up every morning with an optimistic attitude and the mentality that with Christ on my side, I can tackle anything.
I remember this well from when I was in school and as a teenager. It was so rough and so hard to get over as an adult :/
As a new graduate from veterinary school, the comments you look so young were negative to me. You are too young to be doing this, you can’t know anything, can I really trust my animal to you? I had to learn that I could do this. I did not know Jesus then, so it was probably harder than it should have been. But now 20ish years later, I thank the people who tell me I look young. And I accept that some people will not like me. I let God bring us the proper clients and I try my best to serve them with love and grace.
chatter…. well for me I have learned that its an easy way to know who are people you should stay away from. By easy I don’t mean that it will not hurt, oh it can hurt real bad! But at least you won’t waist your time thinking your best friends and building a relationship only to have it fall down around you.
I hope to learn more from watching you both talk about this! And what a great giveaway! Every book that your giving away is on my list of books I need to read but can’t buy right now. I know that whoever wins those will be blessed more then they even know it now!
Oh my inside chatter never stops chatting. Sometimes just a little forgetfulness from a friend can make my inside chatter go crazy and spread negative thoughts. I’m a single mom and my inside chatter just wants to tell me what I did or what I’m not doing right. It drives me crazy, but like I tell my son we are not perfect and that we just have to try our best and move forward. I’m learning how to ignore the negative chatter from inside b/c its another way for the devil to succeed and I will not allow him.
I am pretty consistent with the negative chatter but I’ve learned to turn it off and move on by offering it up to God. I hope I can soon stop it before it stops through God’s love and grace.
I battle with inside chatter a great deal. I am prone to believe it. After an attack and especially when I am not very successful in fending it off – I have learned the best thing I can do is go to the Word and fill my inside with all the truth that God says I am. I tell myself over and over – what matters, what is important, is what God says I am – no one else. When I do that, I can then look at the “smallness” of the moment that started the chatter in the first place. Nothing eases my wounds like God’s opinion of me. 🙂
I encountered Mean Girls late in life — I was 37 years old — and that’s precisely when the negative inside chatter (NIC) began. I have struggled with it ever since, but when NIC is tearing at my heart and soul I just tell myself to just have amnesia — like Christ does about our transgressions. You know, the ones that he has wiped clean. If that doesn’t stick, then I just go do something loving and kind for someone else. Focusing on their needs makes me forget about NIC and transforms my heart attitude… and re-sets my inside chatter. Plus, it helps me remember to be His hands and His feet in the lives of others rather than the victim of mean ole Nic. <3
I remember when we moved to the city where we currently live,changing my hairstyle to try and fit in. I remember that all of the ladies looked so well dressed and put together at Church and I guess I thought cutting off my naturally curly hair and buying a straightening iron, several smooth curling irons and styling products would make me feel a part. Well it has been 7 years since we have lived here and I grew my curly hair back and put away the straightening products. The Lord has and continues to show me when those feelings of worthiness creep in, that He is sufficient, my worth is in Him, and He is all I need.
I’ve learned that the “inside chatter” is just the devil talking, feeding on my insecurities. I need to fill myself, my mind and heart with God’s truth and then the talking turns into mere whispers that I can barely hear, and shake them easily knowing how God sees me.
I have learned that inside chatter keeps me from doing things that I really want to do because of the negitivity that I fill my own head with. I have really started making an effort to stop the negitive chatter before it starts to aftect me and replace it with positive thoughts. I am just thankful I am not the only one that has this “chatter” lol! Whew! I am normal lol! Thanks for helping me on my journey to a better me and making me a better Mom and Wife. 🙂
I haven’t really been dealing with inside chatter, because anytime Satan tries to trick me and lie to me, i have been learning to discern and have clarity and tell him to get behind me! God has been giving me opportunities to speak to my sister in law, last night actually. She is a very young single mother of two who struggles with wanting to be able to be a child herself because she had her first baby while she was still a child. Her mother told her the only option was to keep thr baby. She has never really known or been shown love by her mother so she has lots of inside chatter repeating the horrible things she has heard all her life “you’re worthless, ugly, fat etc” 🙁 I just tell her that God doesn’t say these things to us. God tells us he loves us and we are beautiful and worthy! I love her so much and if I win I will share these awesome books and devotionals with her.
I too was that girl not getting picked. For most of Junior High I didn’t have any friends in the entire school and that is not an exaggeration. I turned to food as a friend and believe what the school said about me being “fat”. Looking back at the pictures, I wasn’t fat by a long shot, but I believe them, and definitely gave in to what they said and by high school I really was fat and have been ever since. I am learning to listen to what God says and to know that I truly am his princess. It’s very very difficult and I am making progress, all be it slowly. I wish I had truly understood for the past 23 years that it was Satan all along. But it sounds so much like my voice. Thank you for your words and your books. I feel like when I read your words, and your 21 day challenge that you have managed to climb inside and read my private thoughts. I never believed that there was someone out there thinking the same thing as me. I hope I get this opportunity as I would love to hear more of what you have written.
I have a horrible inside chatter. I am absolutely my own worst critic!! I have learned that if I talk to God before getting out of bed in the mornings and ask Him to guide my thoughts and block the negativity from coming through then I have better days. I got my husband into counseling for PTSD from his time in the service and on our very first visit the counselor IMMEDIATELY diagnosed me with Post Traumatic Shock Disorder from the murder of my mother. It has been 11 years and I am finally working through and grieving the way I should!!
I can be the world’s worst at insider chatter! I would never talk that way to anyone else, only myself. I am learning that I need to cut myself some slack, that I am in no way perfect and cannot be expected to be, and that God loves my imperfect self.
Battling the “negative” inside chatter is just that a battle….one that is fought with counteracting it with POSITVE inside chatter…what has helped me is heading right to scripture and reading who I am in Christ…who He has created me to be and am still in the process of being transformed more into His likeness. The negatvie chatter holds a wallop of a punch when it comes to the most important roles in my life as a mother, wife, and teacher. When I’ve failed in one of these areas it’s as if a wall has crumbled on top of me and it takes more time than I’d like to admit to recover. I am thankful for a husband who is patient and encouraging and helps me gain perspective quickly so that the I can once again stand tall, finding my confidence and strength in Christ.
I’ve learned that when my focus is fully on Christ, and serving others in love, then my “inside chatter” is just that – Christ focused. When I (almost daily) get distracted and take my eyes off Christ, then I am suddenly filled with negative chatter. It takes an intential effort to keep my thoughts on the right track.
Thank you, Lysa, for helping us to learn to find our identity in Christ !
I, too, deal with inside chatter. If people aren’t saying things, sometimes I imagine they MIGHT be saying them. I have a very low self-esteem. I am currently striving to lose 90 pounds. I was raised in a Baptist pastor’s home. All of these things together make me very hard on myself. I sometimes feel like people won’t like me because of the way I look. I struggle with this at the age of 31. I am happily married with three kids. I should have a grip on this by now. Thank you for the reminder that more times than not my inside chatter is not needed!!
i’m negative foresure i think alot of that has to do with the fact that all my life I have been left out people yelling at me and always pointing the finger at me and the one to always be doing and giving with nothing in return and not shown love. I try to be postivite or change my way of thinking but so hard when things go wrong or i constantly get yelled at ect
Inside chatter can distract us. Learning not to listen to it.
NOt sure why I am leaving a comment, I will not be able to listen to the webcast since I will be working but my inside chatter is your not good enough, Not sure why God I could be a mom/or wife. am I really loveable? worthy?
I too like many deal with the inside chatter daily. I find that my best combat is to replace the negative chatter is to rebuke it in the name of Jesus and replace it with a truth and promise from His word. Sometimes it is a repetitive process til I feel his peace.
My inside chatter keeps me from reaching my full potential…from being who God wants me to be…it makes me think I’m not beautiful, but thank God for His Word! For providing us with a weapon that defeats all fear and discouragement! Thank God for His loving grace!
I have learned, very recently (again!) that what I’m thinking on the inside is NOT what others are thinking about me or what God thinks of me! I really need to quit listening to myself when I’m being negative! 🙂
I have learned that my inside chatter changes depending on whether or not I am consistently in the Word and spendging time with Christ. When I have spent time consistent time with Him the inside chatter is not so bad. It is not all lies. When I haven’t had that consistent time with him then my inside chatter tends to be directly opposite of what the Word of God tells me and I tend to struggle more with putting those thoughts out of my mind!
OH MY, I have always had neg. chatter in my head. I lost my mother at 8 yrs old, and the negativity in my head began. Often, I have wished to be able to sit and talk this stuff out with my mother, as she would love unconditionally! I am married to a wonderful man in the ministry and the watchful eye of every move certainly does not help the neg chatter. SO WANT to be able to learn to shut off the thoughts that keep me from being ALL that God wants for me and from me so that His light shines out from me.
“Inside Chatter” is one of the worst things I deal with – I am always second guessing myself and telling myself I don’t measure up. Then I remind myself that God indeed knew who I was when he made me. It is a constant battle and I am so glad that God is patient with me.
Inside chatter. So glad to finally have a name for what I do to myself. I long for this type of inside chatter to cease so I can hear more clearly what God would have me do.
I agree with the above comments regarding Facebook and social media. A few years ago, I was very hurt when I wasn’t invited to a close friend’s college graduation ceremony. Pictures were posted on Facebook of her smiling and celebrating her accomplishment with other friends. I had prayed for her and encouraged her along the way while she was earning her degree, but then I wasn’t invited to celebrate in the accomplishment of her goal. I heard the “inner chatter” loud and clear that what I had done for my friend was worthless and it had meant nothing to her. My immediate response was to shut down because of the pain I was feeling. I thought about it and prayed about it for several days. I ended up reaching out to her to tell her that I was so proud of her accomplishment, and that I just wanted to touch base on our friendship. I explained how I was feeling, and we discussed our friendship. We’re still friends today, and I’m glad that I had the courage to ignore the “inner chatter” and have a real conversation with my friend about my feelings and our relationship.
I have a problem with inside chatter a lot. I’m not good enough, I am too fat, No one likes me, I did not get invited to this or that. I have to stop and remember it does not matter what I think of myself or what anyone else thinks of me. It only matters what my Creator thinks. He made me the way he wanted so therefore I must be beautiful and lovable.
I’ve learned that I DO let small chatter effect me. I’ve also learned that I can be the cause of small chatter.
I can relate to this devotional on many levels!! I have had such Strong inside chatter this past year and am hoping it will stop! I’ve been involved with a Church group that I feel has lost sight of how to love one another and except each in the place they stand. All are equal in the site of God. I am looking forward to your webcast!
I have learned, very recently (again!) that what I’m thinking on the inside is NOT what others are thinking about me or what God thinks of me! I really need to quit listening to myself when I’m being negative!
The inside chatter in my head can drive me crazy sometimes, telling me I’m not a good enough mom, wife, or Christian. And even though I know in my heart that comparison kills contentment, sometimes I can’t control the inside chatter that is comparing me to other people.
Inside chatter: Boy has that ever been a problem for me. I have always had the issue of listening to it and it controls my life. Thank you Jesus for showing me the truth and knowing You are in control.
P.S. Pick me…..today I am celebrating my birthday. This would make a great gift. 🙂
Inside Chatter has caused so many problems in my life. I have allowed my negative inside chatter to affect how I see myself, in my eyes and in others. I had such a negative view of myself that it has been a daily, sometimes hourly, struggle to allow God into my heart and remove that chatter, but the more I do it, the easier it becomes. He is no longer whispering, you are my child & I love you – it’s becoming louder and louder as each day passes. I just need to settle down and listen.
I really appreciate this post, it’s something I’ve been struggling with lately! I need to remind myself a lot of the ‘smallness’ of the situation and not let it overwhelm me. Thank you!
My inside chatter can really effect my relationship in the most damaging way. I am learning to try and take each of those thoughts captive, by confessing God’s truth instead of negative thoughts and emotions. I think it usualy starts when I begin to compare myself to others instead of how Christ see’s me. It is a daily process, but one I know I can grow and learn to do.
Insider Chatter can either make us or break us. It can make us turn and lean on the Lord for His help. It can break us in so that we turn to it and away from God’s help.
Inside Chatter can negative but sometimes it can be positive. We choose how we want to turn it around.
I hope to be able to listen to the Webinar.
Tomorrow night will be our 2nd class on Made to Crave. Looking forward to all the lessons. I definitely want to complete Unglued after this series.
I think this is a very important issue that everyone should be taught to deal with, not just women. We all have so many voices in our head; and I love that song that Casting Crowns sings (Voice of Truth), which says, “Out of all the voices calling out to me, I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth”. I know firsthand, what that negative voice says to me at times such as the example you gave. It wasn’t until I sought God’s Word for TRUTH, that I was able to deal w/ the lies the inside chatter wanted me to believe. I read a book, alongside studying the Scriptures, that gave great advice against strongholds of such thinking…and I’ve encouraged women to cling to a certain verse ever since. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 says, “For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: 4 (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;) Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ”. I’ve learned to cast down my imaginations (inside chatter) against the knowledge of God (untruth). The more we read the Word, the more TRUTH we know and the less lies we believe.
I have struggled with my negative inside chatter for many years. It affects almost everything I do and many of my relationships, especially with my husband. I would love to be able to change my way of thinking. Thank you for sharing your stories to help other women.
I think everyone has to deal with inside chatter especially us women. We always strive to be the best and have everyone like us and if we feel someone doesn’t we play it over and over in our head. Wondering why? Did I do something? Am I not “cool” enough? Especially younger teens. This is why it is so important to raise our daughters with self esteem and always tell them that they are wonderfully made!
I’m getting better at dealing with the inside chatter. Trying to do bible study in the morning, then exercise which seems to give me a more positive outlook to my day and helps me cut back the negative thoughts about myself, my day, what’s going on in my life.
Inside chatter has always been something that has had a huge impact on me. When I was younger it controlled my life because I didn’t know any different. I grew up as a pastors kid and I always had judgements toward me and it eventually started coming from myself. It made it really hard to have any kind of positive outlook on myself. When I read the book unglued it was amazing. It really helped me look at myself and not look at the negative, Of course its taken a lot more then just reading the book but it definitely helped!
Just like with a lot of women, my inside chatter is not always pretty. What I try to remember is that I am a daughter of the King and will always be his princess – this helps me turn that chatter into something more positive.
I have struggled with my negative inside chatter for many years. It affects almost everything I do and many of my relationships, especially with my husband. I would love to be able to change my way of thinking, and have been working very hard at this lately. Thank you for sharing your stories to help other women.
I struggle with inside chatter a lot. On bad days I can even be convinced that God only loves me because He has to love everyone…but I know in my soul that this isn’t correct. I know He loves me. The me He is creating me to be. The me He knew before He formed me in my mother’s womb. I still would like to get to the place where people and situations didn’t shred my confidence, because I immediately defend it with God’s word. I would love to love me as much as He loves me. I’m so glad that He is continuing to work on me!
Thank you, Lysa, for this reminder! This “stinkin’ thinkin’ ” is a problem I struggle with on a daily basis. The Bible verses on notecards idea is one I use alot. I need to be more intentional about praying when I hear the negative voices in my head! “I am loved. I am God’s child. He cares for me. He wants me to live in spiritual victory. I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”…think on these things. Excited about the webcast and the giveaway!
Growing up in a single parent home I was often told that I would never amount to anything and that no man would ever want anyone like me. Through the years I have built up a wall so that no one could get too close because I didn’t want anyone to see what my mom had seen in me. I now know that these were not things she saw in me but how she felt about herself. Somedays these feelings come rushing back and I have to pray that The Lord will give me strength to not believe the hurt of the past but rely on the hope of the future He has planned for me.
I am a OAT, Over active thinker. My mind is always going, if it isn’t on the to do list at home, it’s looking back at how fruitful I was yesterday or how unfruitful I was, etc… My Pastor’s wife and great friend of mine said to me last summer during one of my pitty parties “those who minds are stayed upon the Lord is at perfect peace” Isaiah 26:3 That is God’s word! When we keep our minds upon him we are in perfect peace because God is our peace. When the inside chatter starts I have to stop and ask myself what Philippians 4:8 says Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admmirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things. So when my mind is taking me through past mistakes, or times when my feelings were hurt, or lies from the enemy, or how my co-worker’s complaining is getting on my nerves, I have to stop and ask is this true? is this noble? is this loveing? Yes, People have hurt me in the past, people may get on my nerves but God has called us to love other’s. Prov 29:18 Where there is no vision people, the people perish. I think in the midst of our chatter on the inside we have to see the vision God has set before us. His plans are good for us, whatever the enemy tries to do to us to harm us God promises to turn it around for our good! Those things we must speak and decree and declare and that is when the chatter stops. To God be all the Glory!
When my focus is on Christ, and on serving others then my “inside chatter” tends to be just that – Christ focused. But, when I (almost daily) lose my focus, take my eyes off Christ, that chatter quickly changes to more negative self-focused thoughts. It takes intentional effort to keep my inside chatter in line with my theology.
I’ve learned to listen to the positive inner voices and be aware of the negative inner voices that want to take me down. Thank you for this positive ministry!
My inside chatter changes depending on how often I’m on the word or listening to the Lord instead of my inside chatter. The inside chatter is all lies. I need to get rid of those thoughts and instead quote verses constantly or think of all the blessings that God has given me. I do need to realize that inside chatter many times comes from Satan and I need to stop listening to the lies. Praise God that I am saved!
My inside chatter has been digging a pit for 42 years. When ever God has encouraged me and I have been able to get past some of that brokenness, and I’ve gained some victory, that voice inside will not seem to allow me to enjoy it! As soon as I’m not eating perfectly, exercising for exactly the right amount of burnt calories, basically if I’m not keeping up perfectly with whatever I feel I should be capable of doing “right” by now, those voices tell me I’m a failure, which leads to wrong behavior, depression, anxiety. I have to back to God every single day! Help me Lord to change my thoughts, help me to remember that I am growing spiritually ever day, help me see me the way You see me…etc. yes. It is a daily struggle after a childhood filled with neglect.
Hold my mule…I think I’m gonna shout right now!!! My “Inside Chatter” is going to be the death of me. I’ve learned that she needs to “hush.” Thank you SO much for this quote “Don’t put the whole of your identity into the smallness of this situation”, and this verse “For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, AND YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN FULLNESS IN CHRIST,” (Colossians 2: 9-10). I truly feel convicted per my “Inside Chatter” and I am praying for deliverance. Preach Lysa!!!
I was just discussing this with our “Made to Crave” study group yesterday at church. It goes along with what you discuss in the book about how we identify ourselves. I’m trying to learn to not let that “inside chatter” or negative identity get to me or define me. Instead I’m CHOOSING to focus on who I really am…a child of God. I feel as long as I stay in His Word and pray CONSTANTLY then all that negative will start to dissipate.
The enemy is good with his lies and the inside chatter/lies that I allow to run rampant in my head can sometimes paralyze me with immobility to move, impotency to act and inability to see truth. However, the Spirit is who lives IN me (as the enemy does not) reminds me gently of truth. Reminding me Of who I am but more importantly of who God is and I am not bound by my finite mind or capabilities. God wants the unwanted. He used the throw always. He finds worth in me not because of me but because of the work of Christ on the cross that is tattooed on my soul and says I am His.
My Inside Chatter leaves me feeling lonely, unworthy, and useless. I was that girl and sometimes feel like I still am. God’s calling to my heart gives me comfort and strength. He is my true friend, never failing, ever loving.
For me the inside chatter comes from different reasons. I have two beautiful daughters and my youngest has Down Syndrome. I go back and forth with myself a lot about not being a good enough mom for either one of them…that I’m not doing enough, not patient enough, etc. I have to remind myself all the time that God chose me to be their mommy…it’s back and forth all the time.
I have also struggled (and continue to struggle) with inside chatter since I was very young. God revealed to me that this form of self pity (along with other forms) is a sin. You see, when you put so much emphasis on yourself, whether it is good or bad, it is selfish. This inside chatter is putting your focus on yourself and taking it off of our Lord and Savior where it belongs. Psalms 10:4 says In his pride the wicked man does not seek Him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God. It’s easy to think of pride as being boastful and puffed up, but the opposite is also true. Selfish pride is any thoughts that turn our focus on ourselves and away from God. Praise Him for his merciful kindness! May we continue to strive to love Him more.
I unfortunately passed the bad habit of listening to the inner chatter to my two beautiful daughters, and now that they are young adults, it rears it’s ugly head quite often. I need them to learn freedom so they can fully walk in all that God has for their lives!!! And one way to do that is for me to find freedom in Christ – that they can then see the path to freedom! Thank you!
This is my first time to read your blog. I got the link from Proverbs 31 Ministries. I have “inside chatter” going on quite often. And I just have to remind myself that it is not from God. I liked your blog and will read it more. Thanks!
I’ve struggled with negative chatter my whole life. I continue to pray for peace and be shown my worth. What I’ve learned to date is just how destructive this truly is and joe easy is is to allow it to destroy you. I struggle each day but now have a loving Savior by my side. I go to Him when my chatter starts.
As much as I’d like to deny it, I still battle “inside chatter”… I AM older now, and will “take every thought captive” but I can’t say they don’t try to creep in…… I will correct myself, but truly am looking forward to the day when it stops more than it starts…. I notice it’s more so in some areas of my life than others…. 🙂
I think we all have in some form or fashion inside chatter. Sometimes I let it take me the wrong direction. That is something I have to really work on. Sometimes though I think it can be good. It can nag at you when you need to help someone or just be the listening ear when someone needs to talk instead of just running away from the situation. When that happens I feels it’s God’s chatter in my ear telling me what to do.
I am working on my seven yr. old sons destructive internal chatter that becomes external (thankfully). I need to learn what God says about how to handle those thoughts. One of my favorites is “take every thought captive..”
I’ve struggled with negative chatter my whole life. What I’ve learned to date is just how destructive this truly is and how easy it is to allow it to destroy you. I struggle each day but now have a loving Savior by my side. I go to Him when my chatter starts.
I have tried to utilize a mental “stop”…when I have those feelings of insecurity, self-doubt, and dare, I say self-loathing, I picture God holding up his hand and telling me to seek peace and to “be still.”
When life gets hectic and I don’tmake time to spend time with the Lord and pray, I find that my inside chatter is constant. It’s harder for me to quiet those voices and negative thoughts. The Lord is so good to remind me how worthy I am and how much he loves me!
Negative self talk……something I have been dealing with for so long! Why do we allow ourselves to talk about us like this! I would not let someone else talk about me this way!
Last spring I went through a study on Biblical thinking. I was what I needed. I think I need to continuously go through the notes from that study. One thing I learned was to write (on a 3 x 5 card) a verse ~ a promise from God ~ that tells you the truth about the lie that you are telling yourself. Each time you find yourself struggling with negative self talk, pull that verse out of your pocket and read it aloud to yourself. Pray that God will give you the strength to remember who you are in Him. You are a daughter of the King of Kings!
I am looking forward to hearing more about this struggle tomorrow night. It is good to know I am not alone.
I know this chatter has affected me over the years and affects young girls and women of ages. Thank you Lisa for all that you do in helping us address the real issues.
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. Deep down I know how valueable I am to God but I can be pretty harsh to myself. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am my true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. Fantasize about God coming through for me then he will be on the throne of my heart. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” Praise God because I am making imperfect progress! Thank you Lysa for your transparency, honesty, and I look forward to seeing you at Women of Faith in Henderson in May!
Thank you for addressing this struggle. I do struggle with inside chatter and have found that during these times I have to run to the Lord. If I listen to it and buy into the lies then it is like it gets in between the Lord and I, as I distance myself and feel unworthy of His love, so if I run to Him immediately and ask for His help and His truth then I can mentally fight against the chatter and extinguish the flaming darts.
I am learning to be more aware of my inside chatter and stop it in it’s tracks. I turn my thoughts around by replacing them with positives, telling myself that it’s just Satan’s lies, reading the Bible or devotionals, etc.
My negative chatter has been busy these last few days. Friday I got a call from my divorce attorney saying Mediation had been set for February, Saturday was my 11th wedding anniversay (which I spent home alone) Only to pick up my children on Sunday to the chatter of how much fun they had with their dad and his girl friend over the weekend. I’ve always felt rejected by my mother, my father was never in my life, my husband has rejected me, and eventhough I know it’s a lie I was feeling rejected by my own children. Please pray with me to get a control of these thoughts to know and FEEL God has not and will not reject me, and he has such a wonderful plan for my life despite my current circumstances.
What I’ve learned to date is just how destructive this is. I struggle each day but now have a loving Savior by my side. I go to Him when my chatter starts.
One important thing I’ve learned about ‘inside chatter’ is that satan is RELENTLESS!! And how important it is to stay plugged-in/abiding in Gods word and His truths of who we are, and that other humans – friends, family and spouses are NOT our enemy! Thank you Lysa for sharing this and for being genuine and transparent!! I LOVE the reminder that “I can’t/shouldn’t put the whole of my identity in the smallness of a situation.”
Negativity has been in my life since the day I was born. I was raised in the most negative family you could possibly dream of. I know that the inisde chatter I hear reflects words I’ve heard my whole life. I am not a negative person, I always try to be positive and people who don’t know me on a personal level would never imagine the inside chatter that I fight daily. I am tired of fighting the negative voices – you know, the ones that tell me that I am not good enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough, I’ll never be any better than I am right now. I want to conquer it once and for all!
I have learned that I the more I am in the Work the less of my chattering I hear. When He and HIs Word are my focus my chatter changes for the good. As a mom, I am also learning that the chatter inside my head often spills out onto my children, and those repercussions affect the chatter inside of their heads.
Inside chatter – we as women are constantly thinking and talking to ourselves. Key phrases: complain & remain; praise and be raised; attitude of gratitude. Unfortunately my inside chatter is like a roller coaster but I know with God’s help I can keep it positive. Loved Unglued!
I have a horrible time with “inside chatter”. Constant negativity. Always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Trying to focus on how Big my God is and not how Big my problems seem…I just wish there was a switch I could turn off.
For me inside chatter can ruin my entire day. It sometimes pops out of nowhere and I have to pray it away.
I never had a healthy self-esteem as a child. I had a hereditary jaw problem that was eventually operated on. My parents fought loudly until they divorced and I learned to self-medicate with food. I was never the pretty one of my group of friends and always thought others were better than me. I yearned for the world’s approval. It wasn’t until well into adulthood that I truly believed that my worth came from God. I still struggle with …they’re not talking to me, I don’t fit in, … but I know that when I worship regularly, it puts me in a better mind set. I’m so proud of my daughter. When issues me up at school where she is excluded, I have asked her if those girls are nice girls, if they make her feel good to be around them. She says no. I’ve taught her that popular means exclusive, not so nice behavior most of the time and she should focus on friendships that are supportive and kind. She has a best friend now and it is so wonderful to hear them together. I actually hear them saying things like, “You’re awesome. No, you’re awesome!”. :). That has to help with the negative self chatter!
I will be using your quote “don’t put the whole if your identity into the smallness if the situation” I will be passing it in to all the hurting and struggling girls I come in contact with. Thank you Lysa and Sheila!! You are both such blessings!!!
Inside Chatter…wow you hit the nail on the head with that one. I have struggled & fought with this for so long. Being a pastor’s wife seems to have added to it. Friendships are difficult and where to fit in is a constant challenge. After 8 years, I’m realizing that I need to work on the relationships that are worth working on….my relationship with the Lord and those friends who really, truly care. Looking forward to the webcast! Can’t wait!!
Inside chatter – We all go through things in life and we all have different things that drag us down. For me, words spoken by my family & friends have a great effect on me, especially the negative ones. I don’t know why I keep letting them have this effect on me. I’ve noticed that inside chatter not only affects you on the inside, it changes who you are on the outside, too. So, no matter how many times I hear the words “You weren’t chosen.” there’s always another voice that says “I’ve chosen you, You are Mine!” and that helps me to conquer my inside chatter & to feel safe in His arms, in His presence. Thanks for this post Lysa!
My inside chatter is often not my friend!
I too struggle with the inside chatter, the theme of most of it is that awful “F” word, failure. The insecurities I have about what people think of me are extremely deep and have been since I was in my early teens. The failure of not being good enough, not saying the right things, not doing enough to make them like me, it goes on and on. The story you recalled was me on more times than I can count and I ALWAYS wanted to FIT in. I’m now in a place in my life that the inside chatter is mostly negative about things I’ve said or done and how embarassed it’s made me feel. When those thoughts start to happen, I pray ” a mind controlled by the spirit is peace and life”. Reminding myself that I am a new creation and that the Lord is in control, if I let Him. The opinion of others doesn’t seem to hold up to the opinion my Father has of me.
I’m in the midst of reading Unglued. It’s given me many moments of “I totally get that” and whispering “that’s me”. I appreciate your writing and your daily encouragement.
Some days I can tune out that inside chatter….some days it seems it is all I can hear. I need to be reminded WHO I am and WHOSE I am! Thanks!
Needed this today! I continually have to remind myself that I am not the label that I think I am, I am a princess of the king, I am loved and desired by Him.
So many defining moments/ events that I’m working through…divorce, failure…etc. some days I just get tired of the battle yet I know the importance if speaking the truth to myself.
Thank you for that verse. So many times I seek out my identity in how others feel about me rather than recognizing that I am already whole in Christ. My identity is in Him alone!
Oh thank You for that post today! You hit the chatter in my head with a hammer and nailed the negativity that was going on up there. How in the world do I let those simple little moments grow and grow until they take over and not only define the situation but define who I am and how I treat others as well. So totally not what God intended but surely what the Enemy intends. Reading the other posts it looks like this “infection” in our heads knows no boundaries. It is effecting the young, the older, the single person, married, with or without child. Cannot wait for the webcast!!! Lysa do not ever ever wonder if your words are significant to anyone other than yourself…..they most definitely are! Keep it coming Girlfriend and we will try to keep up with you.
Inside chatter has become more destructive as I have gathered more roles in life. Satan uses my responsibilities as leverage as he whispers “you could be a better wife” or “you’re a terrible mother.” It hurts me more when the way I love/care for/treat my family is attacked. The great news is, like these other ladies have shared, the more in tune I am with God the less I struggle with Satan’s lies. Deciphering God’s voice is absolutely possible for His children as John 10:4 points out “And when he putteth forward his own sheep, he goeth before them, and the sheep follow him: for they know his voice.”
I’ve learned that it’s ok to get bossy with myself and INSIST that I focus on truth instead of my flesh! God’s word is truth. My flesh is whiney 🙂
2012 was full of inside chatter…I just can’t listen to it anymore. So in 2013 I will not!
I allowed it to convince me of things that I knew really were not true and it turn I was not fun to be around, but when it starts now I turn to Jesus to block that garbage out.
I think inside chatter happens to every women and I know with me personally it has tempted me to “hide” inside myself, not try new things or step out of my comfort zone. I really feel like it is Satan making his way into our lives. I try now to listen to God more and trust in his love and grace to help me when I doubt myself. I am always good enough in God’s eyes!
Oh, the many thoughts that tumble through my head in one day! Are they mine? Are they evil penetrating darts from our enemy? Are they fleeting ideas, vain and uninspiring? And why oh why do I listen to them when it only leads to negetivity, discontentment, and even sin. It’s because I am not firmly rooted in the Love of Christ. The Lord gives me power, love, and a sound mind.(2Tim 1:7) I have the mind of Christ (1Cor 2:16). Anything else I choose to hear and believe is a lie. Lies are straight from hell and I certainly don’t want to go there! I am a seed of righteousness and filled with the Truth in Jesus!
My inside chatter is my own negative thoughts of not being good enough or pretty enough. I am my own worst enemy… everyone else accepts me the way I am, so why can’t I.. I must reprogram my inside chatter to reflect the positive and what God thinks about me, not what anyone else thinks about me.
Can’t wait for the webcast!!! I ignore the inside chatter . I turn on Klove & just sing along with the music …
One important thing I’ve learned about ‘inside chatter’ is that satan is RELENTLESS!! And how important it is to stay plugged-in/abiding in Gods word and His truths of who we are, and that other humans – friends, family and spouses are NOT our enemy!
Inside chatter? It is something I have always struggled with. Now that I’m a pastor’s wife it seems to have intensified. I know it’s the enemy’s way of attacking to cause doubt and stir up discord. Even though I know that inside chatter is lies of the enemy and that the Truth of God’s grace and purpose for my life prevails, I’m still a girl who battles.
What I’ve learned about the inside chatter is that it is an attempt by Satan to keep me from believing the things that I know are true about me. I didn’t even realize I was doing it, but I have been believing lies – I’m not smart enough, I’m not loved, I’m never going to be good enough. Why would I believe this when I know God says the exact opposite about me?! My own inner dialogue has been far more harmful to me, than anything that anyone else could ever say about me, BUT I am consciously working to squash those negative thoughts, and replace them with truth. 🙂
My negative chatter has been very loud lately. I haven’t quite figured out how to combat it – but it usually ends with a phone call to my husband who helps to reassure me. And now I’m beginning to watch our daughters with the same internal conflicts – I wish I had all the right answers for them.
Inside Chatter- has to be combatted with God’s truth. Also we have to stop assuming the worst about ourselves and others.
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. Deep down I know how valueable I am to God but I can be pretty harsh to myself. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am. My true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. Trust in the Lord with all my heart and in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” Praise God because I am making imperfect progress! Thank you Lysa for your transparency, honesty, and I look forward to seeing you at Women of Faith in Henderson in May!
As much as I would like to say I have retrained myself from this thinking, I’m human. I have to make a conscious choice each time, asking God to help overcome the lies. Simply put garbage in, garbage out. Or another, what are you going to fill your cup/glass with? I think many of us need this reminder. Sometimes daily, other times, hour to hour.
As a foster momma on adoption #4 I’m under several microscopes. Everyone & they’re case worker has a say in my parenting & an opinion of me based on a stack of paperwork. I have to dive into His word daily & swim in the truth that I was chosen & He is at work in & through me despite my faults & flaws. We are who God says we are; beloved.
I’ve learned a good deal about negative chatter. The main thing: it will take me places that were never meant for me to go. Negative chatter tries to make me believe (and sometimes does) things that never happened and were never said. Positive chatter (pure, truth, love–all things captive to the obedience of Christ) is much healthier and promotes good within my heart and mind, which produces good out of my mouth.
Can’t wait for tomorrow night!
Every time I try to talk ugly to myself, inside or not, I stop myself and turn it into something positive. Instead of ‘I’m so fat and awful’, it is ‘Michaelangelo eat your heart out’. Instead of ‘you idiot you are going to be late’, it is ‘relax, G-d may be working a miracle right now.’ And so on. It doesn’t take long to get into a habit of self love. Most of the time we do this to ourselves we are anxious, which comes from a place of fear, which is separate from G-d. More love, more G-d, less fear, less anxiety, less self hate. G-d bless, oooo
I am hoping that I will be able to change my Inside Chatter. It seems like I can encourage those around me, but when it comes to myself, I can’t think of anything positive to say!
What I have learned from inside chatter is that I still have far to go to overcome it. I need to be looking to God for help instead of letting the voices overrule!! At times that makes me feel like a failure but realize we are “imperfect works in progress” and I need to just keep pushing forward…perseverance. Down with the negative chatter 🙂
Still have negative chatter….but working on it!
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. Deep down I know how valueable I am to God but I can be pretty harsh to myself. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am. My true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. Trust in the Lord with all my heart and in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” I am making imperfect progress! Thank you Lysa for your transparency, honesty, and I look forward to seeing you at Women of Faith in Henderson in May!
WOW!! This really hits me today. I too, as many have stated, was the girl that didn’t get picked. I’m not really sure why I still remember that incident so vividly, when later in life I realized I didn’t really like the girls that didn’t pick me, but never the less, I still remember how I felt. Even to this day, I sometime hear this inside chatter, but have realized when I do, if I go straight to Christ, the chatter goes away. We’re all human, and this “chatter” will never really go away and stay away, the trick is to just take this problem like all the other to Christ for Him to direct us in the direction that will help us.
One important thing I’ve learned about ‘inside chatter’ is that satan is RELENTLESS!! And how important it is to stay plugged-in/abiding in Gods word and His truths of who we are, and that friends, family and spouses are NOT our enemy!
I’m learning, with inside chatter, to pay attention to the thoughts that are running through my mind, rather than allow them to roam freely and rampantly. Not necessarily so that I can believe them, but rather so that, if they are negative, lies, or contrary to Biblical truth, I can take them captive and replace them with truth (and specific Biblical truth if applicable).
I think my inside chatter is the enemy trying to pick at my insecurites. The more that I try to focus on the positive chatter the negative gets, rather, attempts to get a little louder. Thats when I allow the song of my heart to get louder and I begin to praise God more.
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. Deep down I know how valueable I am to God but I can be pretty harsh to myself. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am. My true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. Trust in the Lord with all my heart and in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” I am making imperfect progress!
I was so happy to read this post today and can’t wait to hear more! I have always struggled with inside chatter and it has always come in waves. I am currently in the middle of a struggle with it and am really trying to just give it all to God, He is the only one who can work on me and my thoughts, I know, but my stubborness won’t seem to let me let go of it completely.
Wow-what a timely and much needed word from God! It amazes me how much these thoughts creep into my head. The need to be included, to feel love and accepted by those around us, takes up too many hours of my life! Thank you for this wonderful reminder!
It’s hard not to listen to the inside chatter. If I immediately turn over my thoughts & ask Christ to take them captive, it turns off all that negative inside chatter 🙂
What a great topic to battle w/ big guns, yourself AND Sheila Walsh! I have been working on quieting and effectively listening to my insider chatter since going thru Unglued, i.e. the gentle noticing…I have become MORE aware, and am now taking the necessary steps to discern and effectively transform my mind with His word with what I am hearing! Looking forward to hearing/seeing you speak THIS Friday evening Bayside, Roseville, CA!
Inside chatter is a struggle for me. I tell myself that my duties are unimportant and go unnoticed and when I come unglued I feel so much guilt and tell myself what an angry woman I am. Recently, I became weary of the negative self talk and began writing positive post it notes to myself that I placed on my mirror. Every morning I read my notes outloud to myself and to God to combat my poor self image. First, I tell myself to smile. I look at my smile and say to me, “I am beautiful inside and out. My mistakes do not define who I am. My true self is only found in the Lord Jesus. Trust in the Lord with all my heart and in all of my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. I’m not an angry woman. I am kind, compassionate, and patient I love others as God loves them.” I am making imperfect progress!
Oh thank you so very much for this post. I am not alone in feeling this way. I too need to remember that God loves me.
I do struggle at times with inside chatter. Sometimes it can lead you in the wrong direction if you let it. Sometimes, however, it can be good. I feel the chatter that is good is God’s voice telling me to help someone or just be there for them.
Yes, I want to hear what you have to say about that “inside chatter”! Thanks for the great webcast and giveaways!
sometimes we have to keep taking TO ourselves instead of listening to ourselves. we don’t understand people or reasoning…and we have to be ok that sometimes…even though it is no fun…that we are not included. there is just so much that we cannot see! this is an AWESOME giftpack and i am sooooooo hoping to win! have been hearing so much about all of your books and have been wanting to get them!! 🙂
The enemy never tires in his relentless efforts to infiltrate our minds and hearts with his endless lies and deception. He only has one goal in mind and that is to make us ineffective for the Kingdom of God…not only that but he wants us to be ineffective wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, and friends. We lose focus watching and listening to the enemy that our guard is let down and the enemy strikes. Too many times we actually keep our eyes on the enemy and just acknowledge God…We need to reverse this mindset and we must acknowledge our enemy, but keep our eyes on GOD. 1 Peter 5:8 Be sober, be vigilant, because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.
I love your ministry and your genuineness of heart for helping women. Our Father’s heart and love is shown through your ministry and that ignites a desire for those who don’t know Him to come to know Him and those who do to only draw closer.
Thank you, Emma
I learned today about Inside Chatter!!
Not only do I suffer from this negative inside chatter but I fail to let the positive inside chatter out. I have wisdom & much to share but when given the opportunity to share I freeze or often get so emotional that I keep it bottled up. I pray NOT for Self-confidence but rather for God-Confidence, that the Holy Spirit will intercede on my behalf, that I will get out of my head, get out of the way to shine the bright light of Christ. I will pray for the fellow Sisters in Christ here to be built up in God-Confidence, as well. God Bless & many blessings to all. Thank you for offering this web-cast I plan to tune in.
I’ve noticed more about My inside chatter because I am aware of my Children’s inside chatter. I tell them to not let it bother them, to pray for their enemies, to rely fully on God & then I’m forced to look at my own life – Does my life relfect what I’m teaching my children?
I love these posts and I adore how, as Christian women, we are able to lean on each other to remind each other how best to live Godly lives to be the best wives/mothers/women we can be and to minister to others by the standards we choose to live by and display.
Thank you for allowing God to work through you! I look forward to the webcast. Thanks, again!
Inside chatter or stinking thinking makes me think and do things that I wouldn’t normally do or think. I can sit down, look back, and realize what caused me to spiral in the first place. Unfortunately, it doesn’t take much. I’m learning to change the ‘tape’ of the inside chatter and focus on the truth of who God says I am and what I meant to Him.
Inside chatter will eat you alive if you allow it to. You must call on the name of Jesus and ask Him to bound those thoughts up and do away with them. That inside chatter is Satan just trying to steal your joy. Call on the power of Jesus!
I’ve learned to tune out the “chatter” by reaching out to a friend and putting my focus on her, not my own insecurities. Spending time with a friend soothes the bruised spirit. I have 3 very close girlfriends that always pick me up. They send me to the word and often will send the scripture via text or email. I know God put them in my life for just this. I love to be that “sounding board” for them too. It’s amazing, we are not all down in the dumps at the same time, usually it’s just one of us and the other 3 pull us out of the pit. I love mi amigos!
I think we all tend to go through times in our life where we listen to the ‘inside chatter’! We take others opinions and the way they make us feel and use them to define who we are! Really we need to be looking to our Heavely Father and seeking to see how He sees us, that is through the finished work of the cross~Grace!!
Thank you!! Jesus Reigns!!
Inside chatter or stinking thinking makes me think and do things that I wouldn’t normally do or think. I can sit down, look back, and realize what caused me to spiral in the first place. Unfortunately, it doesn’t take much. I’m learning to change the ‘tape’ of the inside chatter and focus on the truth of who God says I am and what I mean to Him.
God is good! There are always other parties and more important people who want you to be part of their lives;)
I’ve struggled with this all my life and I’ve learned that I have to spend time with God in His Word and through prayer, as well as scripture memorization, to help me through times of negative inside chatter and remember God’s plan for my life.
My in side chatter is very negative. I have always had a poor view of myself and the only way I get past it is reading the Bible and going to God in prayer. Lysa Terkeurst you devotionals have always have helped to know exactly where in the Bible to look when the “inside chatter” is taking is bringing me down.
I have always evaluated any relationship and situation in my life and if it falls apart I am quick to assume it is my fault, always questioning why. Overcoming my self worth has been something I have been trying to work on and praying for. Looking forward to the webcast
I have had this so many times in my life. Now when it happens I say to myself, God Loves Me!!! Get away from me Satan. This does help!
It’s hard not to listen to the inside chatter. If I immediately turn over my thoughts & ask Christ to take them captive, it turns off all that negative inside chatter!
I call it self-talk, but inside chatter works too. I went through a very hard time last year, inside myself, and it seemed I was constantly telling myself, “I just can’t do this, I can’t go on.” I experienced bouts of anger and sadness like I had never felt before. And no, I wasn’t going through menopause (my first thought). I went on antidepressants and finally those words were gone, but when I got off the medicine, it seemed like I had to fight harder to keep myself positive. I have learned that when I start feeling that way, if I will begin to praise God for all His goodness in my life, and mentally start listing all the good things He has done for me and my family, those words go away and are replaced by praise. I have found that the best inside chatter, is the chatter with God, praising Him and letting Him change the things in me that need to be changed. When I feel angry, I try to focus on the good things that are in my life. If I am aggravated at my children (I have a 22 year old, a 20 year old and 2-16 year olds, along with all their wives and boyfriends) I begin to thank God for them and I find I am not quite so aggravated. Sometimes I forget but the Holy Spirit is good to prompt me!!
I struggle with inside chatter that tells me how I am failing, what I have failed at, how often I fail…… You’ll NEVER get it right. I have to hold those thoughts captive immediately before they grow exponentially in size and swallows me up into darkness. And more often than not, I don’t realize it has happened. Only when I am diligently walking with and seeking The Lord, I have ears ready to listen to the Holy Spirit guide me away from the inside chatter. Guiding me to the truth of who I am in Christ, truth that burns away the lies.
Inside Chatter…. I have listened to this too much in the past! What I have been learning ids that the inside chatter is not GOD speaking to you! And you must take comfort in what GOD wants you to hear! This is a daily battle between you and that inside evil voice trying to drag us down. Let’s listen to GOD!
I love that you called the situation with the girls at school smal,l because that is what it is in the grand scheme of things. When it is happening it seems really big so I wish I would have been able to think of it like that back then. I’m sure I have been on both sides of Inside Chatter and as I get older I realize that who I am socializing with has alot to do with how I act and it is very easy to get caught up in the negativity. With God’s help, I am working on this and I hope that as my 5 year old son grows, I I hope that can have the wisdom and the words to help him through these types of situations.
‘Inside Chatter’ it sounds like something I should be listening to and learning from! I would LOVE to win this package and become involved with the webcast!!
I struggle with inside chatter that tells me how I am failing, what I have failed at, how often I fail…… You’ll NEVER get it right. I have to hold those thoughts captive immediately before they grow exponentially in size and swallows me up into darkness. Only when I am diligently walking with and seeking The Lord, I have ears ready to listen to the Holy Spirit guide me away from the inside chatter. Guiding me to the truth of who I am in Christ, truth that burns away the lies.