I like peace. I crave peace. I want peace — in my relationships, in my ministry, in my life. Peace is good. But sometimes I want peace so much that I sacrifice progress for the sake of peace. And I’m learning that’s a mistake.
If I make my primary goal to keep the peace, I limit the opportunity to address things that need to be addressed. I shy away from addressing conflicts. I limit necessary communication. And when you limit communication, you limit the potential of the relationship.
I’m trying to remind myself daily it’s not the absence of conflict that determines whether or not my relationships are healthy. It’s knowing how to handle the conflicts that will arise. It’s desiring to make progress even if it costs me some peace. It’s realizing peace and progress don’t often hold hands and operate simultaneously.
Progress propels us out of a comfort zone.
Progress pushes against the resistance of neutrality.
And calls us to want our relationships to be better even if that costs us some peace.
Remember conflict doesn’t always mean we have to fight against something and tear it apart. Conflict can also mean we’re fighting for something to make it even better and stronger than it’s ever been.
Do you have a relationship you need to fight for in your life? My book, Unglued, will equip you to have better relationships as you learn to address areas of conflict in healthy ways that lead to progress. Don’t enter this year’s holiday season without it.
And if you’ve read Unglued leave me a comment below and tell me what you learned. Even if it’s that I’m way more crazy than you. I definitely let my crazy out in this new book. Smiles.