Have you ever been in a situation where something little felt really big? Like a look from someone that suddenly makes you feel they don’t like you at all. Or when someone doesn’t return your phone call and you feel like it’s an indication that you’re not important.
Usually these things aren’t true.
The look was just a look with no hidden meaning.
The missed phone call was just a slip on their to do list.
But, if we’re not careful, those misguided feelings can create issues that distract us, discourage us, and trigger past pain to start taunting us.
It happened to me last Friday. My sister, Angee, and I got up at 3am and were in line at a certain retail establishment at 3:30 am. I know. I agree. That’s crazy.
But like a hunter stalking his prey, I was after something. You see, I’ve been having this little issue with my washing machine where my just washed clothes come out still dirty. That’s sightly problematic when your people are teenagers that like to wash their clothes after EVERY wearing.
It’s not so problematic for me.
I’m the queen of rewearing stuff. Doesn’t bother me a bit.
But not my children. They are a little over the top about their definition of clean. My sister has this same overactive cleaning situation going on. My mom calls it her “AC/ DC.” Um, no, Mom, that’s a rock band. It’s called OCD. Anyhow.
At the 3:30 am hour, there we stood. I was after the buy one get one free washer and dryer. Angee was after a half price computer. When the store doors opened at 5am we both scored. Happiness abounded.
Then we left to get some breakfast. This is the part of the story where the happiness faded.
In the drive-thru, my credit card was “not approved.”
Let me get this straight. It WAS approved at the store just 5 minutes ago where I made a major purchase. But now for a little $2 bundle of egg, cheese, Canadian bacon and English muffin- suddenly I’m NOT approved?
NOT approved.
Not APPROVED.
Ouch.
My sister wasn’t phased by the situation a bit. She whipped out cash, paid for my breakfast and headed to the next store on our list.
But those words, “not approved” hung like a black cloud over my head. It bothered the stink out of me. I knew it was just some sort of clerical glitch but that’s not what it felt like.
When that girl leaned out of the drive-thru and in a hushed tone said, “I’m sorry ma’am but your card keeps coming up as not approved,” it felt personal. Really personal.
Suddenly, my past pain started running its mouth. “You’re nothing but a loser. You are unwanted. You are unloved. You are so disorganized. You are poor. You are not acceptable. You are not approved.”
Do you see how those small things can suddenly feel so big. Do you see the subtle shift happening? It went from my credit card being not approved to ME being ‘not approved.’ And had I left my heart to wallow in that mess, it could have- probably would have- wrecked my whole outlook that day.
Praise God, I have enough truth stored up inside of me, that I recognized what was happening. I realized my past pain was talking and needed to be brought back under the authority of Truth. Those old feelings have no business running rampant in my mind and my heart.
“We take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ,” (2 Corinthians 10:5).
“Whatever is true… think on such things,” (Philippians 4:8).
“Set your hearts on things above, set your minds on things above,” (Colossians 3:1-2).
My feelings were indicating my soul was a little hungry for some truth. So, I feed it truth. And I starved it of the lies begging to get down deep inside and mess me up.
After a quick call to the credit card company and an assurance from us that we were actually the ones buying a washer and dryer at 5am- all was well.
After the company was assured of the truth, my credit card was once again approved.
But even better, after being assured with THE TRUTH, so was I.
I sooooo needed to read this. Probably need to read it 2-3 times a week. Starve the lies with truth. That is so wonderfully put. I thank you for writing this and I thank God for working in and through you. Jeni
It wasn’t until reading through some of the other comments that I realized just how deep this post was going to set in.
Today, for the start of a second Christmas season, I feel alone and abandoned which stinks because this is my second Christmas as a wife. Shouldn’t it be fun and full of love? Last year, the ‘trimming of the tree’ was accompanied by lots of tears, yelling, and a trip to the counselor where I proudly stated “I’m done.” After many prayers, things got better and I was determined that this year would be different. We would enjoy our own traditions; so what if our tree wasn’t real and somewhat small. Who cares if we live in a house that isn’t ours and is decorated with all of his grandparents things. The countertops don’t hold all of the holiday trinkets; they’ll just stay in the attic. We still have each other and that’s all that matters, right?? Hanging up the lights outside was AWESOME! We had a great time and got it all done in under 2 hours. Then, came time to decorate inside and, well, let’s just say it was a repeat of last year minus the counseling session.
Now, sitting at my cube thinking about last night I just want to go home to my parents and forget about making new traditions. I like the old ones better anyways… why can’t home just be with my husband? :*(
I had an encounter yesterday that totally overtook me emotionally…something small that got totally blown out and almost held me back from wanting to step out in faith again. After reading your post, perfectly timed once again, I realized that Satan was just trying to feed me with his lies, my pain from the past, to stop me from stepping out and leading in faith in the future. Thanks once again for such a timely post, with instant apllication to my life. Thank you for allowing God to use you to reach those of us out in this world that need encouragement from Him through you. Thank you for doing what you do!
Oh I remember when that happened to our family once. We were out for dinner and we went to charge the bill, and our credit card came back “unapproved”. Thankfully we had enough cash on us to cover the meal, but it was embarrassing. The same thing had happened as it did with you. We had just made a large purchase from the States in the way of electronic musical equipment for our son, and the credit company had put a hold on our card until they could verify the card hadn’t been stolen and used. Just a safeguard. I have to admit we were very thankful to know that someone was that aware of all our purchasing and looking out for us just in case something ever did happen. Instead of feeling annoyed, I have to admit, we were filled with peace. It was a little inconvenient, but it was ultimately for our good.
Interesting how a similar situation can evoke different feelings in people. You felt rejection and I felt relief.
Funny…wish I could feel that same relief right now. Came home to find messages from my Dr’s office and from the hospital…more tests scheduled. Trying not to worry while claiming the verses you shared above.
Holding onto Truth,
Joy
Oh…I can so relate. I filter things through my emotions and I can sometimes (OK, more than sometimes
)go off the deep end over the smallest things. I always have to let God get a hold of my emotions so I won’t believe the lies. I have verses that I’ve memorized for this very reason and I speak them when I’m getting ready to go over the cliff on the emotional roller coaster.
Thanks for the words of Truth…I really needed them today!
Oh yeah, been there, done that!! More than once! The worst ones are the “rejected manuscript” emails
. Thanks for the reminder.
I definitely needed that! I am trying to overcome these types of issues and learn to rely on God and not worry about what other people think of me.
“take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ.” I need to have that tatooed on my hand as a reminder. I often take things personally and I should stop doing that. Thanks Lysa!
Thanks for this post I really needed it today! Go is just using you to breath the truth back into my heart about these issues too. Blessings!
This is why you’re such a great writer! You speak from
The heart and allow Him to use your words.
Oh man! Sunday morning, I totally did this with my husband’s non-reaction to something (a very stupid something teeny tiny) that I thought he should have reacted to. It turned into a very not pretty mess. Thanking God for His truth that did prevail once I let it. Thanks for your honesty, Lysa.
You are awesome! I call this type of thinking my train because I let one thought enter in and the train takes me on down the tracks to that ugly place. It is amazing the voice that starts telling you one little lie and then the worst possible scenerio is buzzing around in your head and you have no clue how you got there. It is not easy for me to remember to stop that train and put God’s truth in the front but it is very important!!!
Love shopping with my sister or sister-in-law on Black Friday! What crazy fun it is to be in line in the wee morning hours! And I love that your sister was totally unfazed by credit card rejection AND that she actually had cash! I’m assuming the bargains you were after weren’t near your fav eat more chicken place?? ha! As always, thanks for the humor but more importantly the reminders of God’s truth and presence in everyday situations.
So true. So very very true! I was shopping Friday morning as well, did it in my jammies while hubby was braving the local retailer that started some sales at midnight. I am grateful that when we allow Him to, He will open up the truth doors and remind us that those things from our past are not us now. And never will be again. Very glad you got the bargains you sought out; that makes it even more fun!
I can relate to your blog…I too have been “not approved” lately. But it is reassuring to know that His Trust is what we need to focus on! Thanks for the timely reminder. Oh and I am sure the children in your house will approve of the new purchase (as will you). Maybe they will learn to be an expert rewearer like you
Are you peaking in on my life again?? How is it you always post about something I am totally going through???
Thanks again for another wonderful post!
I was visiting my son in a state 1800 miles away and my card wouldn’t go through for a payment! Imagine that? Then I tried to buy a pair of sunglasses. Not accepted. I know the credit co. was trying to protect my card. but it was embarrassing. Call your credit card company first before buying something unusual., or traveling.
I have felt just like that before! It is so embarrassing. I am glad everything worked out..and I am glad you snatched up such a great deal.
all i can say is WOW!! and thank you god has reached me once again through you!
I get up early to start my day and I missed this blog yesterday. Oh well……thank you God for Your truth, that sets me free from the weeds of lies. Thank you Lysa for your honesty and reminding us that The Truth is guaranteed to set us free!!!
Thank you so much for your wisdom, you spoke to my heart today. I struggle with this all the time, and thought it was just me and my “mental health issues”. I have some of those same verses memorized, and when Satan attacks me with those thoughts, I use God’s Word to fight back. THANK YOU!!!
I can sooo relate to this. I have gotten a lot better with “captivating my thoughts” and focusing on the truth rather than the lie but occasionally it happens. I guess it’s just easier to believe the lie sometimes. It’s a daily struggle but I am getting there and will continue trying hearing the truth over the lies.
Haha.. Yes I too have had that happen to me with my credit card. The company said they just wasn’t used to my spending changing like that..but hey its really nice they pay attention like that and protect us. I work in a place where I’ve seen so much identity thefts so I can totally relate to this. I try to look at people with a smile no matter what the look is coming back..lol It has been a struggle especially at work. I so appreciate you sister and your fine words of been there done that’s so keep em coming. God Bless
I am so, so thankful for the truth of God’s Word. It is what helps me stand up and move forward…you know, as opposed to curling up like a ball in a corner and crying my eyes out.
This sort of thing happened to me, just this past week. I work at an office-supply store. We just got new management. And, twice, already, I’ve been spoken to. First, to tell me I’m not being a team player (but this is based on something totally out of my control, so I’m claiming it as NOT TRUE)… and second to tell me that I was not a good salesperson (again, not true… but more to come on this…). About 10 minutes after the “not a good salesperson” talk from my manager, God sent a lovely older woman to my till who –after I encouraged her to save herself a second trip to the store, later, by buying her paper now, while it was on sale– claimed “I guess you’re a really good salesperson, aren’t you?” (and that was right within said manager’s hearing). It was like God sent this woman to me to lift me up and encourage me… to tell me that I AM good enough.
You can’t believe everything everyone tells you… God will let you know what is the TRUTH.
((John 8:32))
I am learning….it is hard …but I AM learning
)))).
You really spoke to me today. I am now waiting for my son to come back with my car. He is checking in with his probation officer due to a series of events that got totally out of control. My point is that people see him as not worth anything after spending time in jail and having to check in with probation. I see a young man who needs reassurance of God’s approval of us, regardless of what we have done in the past. I think I will print out this devotional and send it on with my next correspondence of my jail ministry and Bible studies. They need to be reassured too!
I have a divorced friend. After reading this blog, I feel empowered to be more understanding to her past pain….and not take it personally when she verbally jabs me constantly. I clearly see now she is reacting out of very, very low self-worth. Now I am really pumped to be even more of an “encourager” to her instead of thinking I may as well give up being a loyal, loving friend because she doesn’t give off good vibes like she initially did. At the beginning of our friendship, she was SO grateful I had come into her life, and I was a gift from God, an angel in disguise, etc. Over time, she started withdrawing from me and acting mean-spirited to me for no reason. Talk about hurt feelings!!! But I am understanding today, after this blog, that she is drawing back to the lie that she is unlovable, and so is PUSHING me AWAY before I reject HER. Of course I will not reject her. Interesting how one person’s pain gets passed on..and on..and on until someone gets enlightened by God’s truth and says, “Stop! Enough!”
Thanks Lysa. You are so on target. The enemy has a way of getting into our minds and blowing everything up out of proportion. We must stop and regroup and remember whose
we are. God is so good. He lifts us up and we are again seated with Him in heavenly places. God bless you today and always.
Lysa, you are a true inspiration. I REALLLLLLLLLLLY want your new book. I am trying to fight all of these past lies as well, and food has been my source of comfort for these lies for far too long. I want to turn all of these lies over to God and let Him fill in these deep, dark holes that I keep trying to fill with food, but I never seem to make that transition a permanent one. Maybe…just maybe your book could be the light that points me in the direction of Home.
You mean I’m not alone? There are others, including you? I’m just so glad there are people, especially you, who admit to feeling this way. I’ve struggled with this my whole life. Thanks for the encouragement and I admire you for admitting your true feelings. That’s the biggest battle right there.
Lysa,
Thank you soooo much for your daily encouragement! You have reminded me that no matter what there are other women who struggle with the same things that I do. I have been subscribed to your blog for little more than a month or two. In this time I have found much encouragement. Thank you for what you do!
Thanks for “re-speaking” this great truth into our hearts, Lysa!! The scriptures have always been there, but it somehow shouts, when from a sister or friend!
The Lord bless you, and P31 as you minister to we, your sisters-in-Christ!
This is so true Lysa! I just love this post. The same thing happened to me with my bank card. Apparently you can only take out so much per day and I had reached that limit. Of course it took my money on the bigger items, but on the one less than $4.00, my son rescued me by paying for it. Embarrassing. But it is so strange how our minds just process all of that. It’s almost like our past mistakes are waiting, drooling on the edge of the dance floor just waiting for the right moment to cut in. I really think God lets you go through this stuff so we can learn and keep moving forward. Love you!
Lisa, Everyday I can’t wait until lunch at work so I can be fed from God’s word through Provers 31 devotions. This particular day of devotion and your blog really was a tool I used for my daughter. She has learning disabilities, high functioning autism and ADD and she really struggles with low self confidence. I’ve really been trying to convince her that the things that cause her to be so miserable are lies from the devil. She is constantly struggling with doubt, and discouragement and feels very alone. She is 11. We had just started journaling true statements from God’s word (Phil 4:8). When I saw your blog it was a perfect testimony to share with her that she is not the only one that struggles with the lies of the devil. She was encouraged as was I…..and also for the truth you supported in your blog about trusting God’s word. Thanks for being so transparent and honest and for biblical advice to apply to everyday life. This site has been a gem for me in my daily walk with the Lord as I strive to be that Proverbs 31 women.
Boy, you hit me right on this morning – even dreams can haunt you and make you feel not worthy, not worth anything, as they did last night. But you reminded me that those little things are not big things and what is important is the love of our God, our Father!
Lysa, thank you so much for putting into words the feelings that have overcome me, so many times, when I too have been in such a similar situation.
IPraise God, have slowly come to realise that at these times, I must draw on the Word of God, in order to help me quench the subtle lies of the enemy. it takes practice, as the more I tackle it with the Word, the enemy realises that he doesn’t have a chance.
Thank you for the reminder, God Bless.
Lysa,
Thank you for your constant encouraging words, You bless me each time I read your blog. You are a true blessing and I thank God for using you to encourage us and keep our eyes on God and not on our problems.
God Bless you and your family.
So true!! His truths are what disentangles us from the enemy’s grasp. I recently had a situation where my anxiety (which I’ve been dealing with for a long time and have become so much better at handling – by the grace of God!) sneaked in and reared its ugly head again and threatened to overtake me. And because of all the work I’ve done, of my grounding myself in God and His truths, I was able to fight back and remain on solid ground! Instead of falling into a pit of despair and anxiety, I was compelled to reach for the scriptures I had written out in my “promise notebook” and read over and over again His truths. And within a short time, His peace blanketed me and helped me to claim victory over the situation! What a wonderful feeling!! Praise be to God!
I’m in a place today that pain is yelling loud at me. 2 people were suppose to call me yesterday & neither one did. I hear being worthless. even my own mom seems to be attacking me lately. I know jesus loves me but then I start to feel punished. I’ve been kicked alot since I was a kid. Most times I feel the lords love for me.I also know that when I’m doing what I’m called to do I get attacked more. More growing experiences.I just have to keep in touch with those promises more
This spoke to me louder than anything has in a very long time. Thank you for sharing it & for including the scriptures. Your blog blesses me immensely!
Daileeeeee! This is such a struggle with me. My sons father and I had bad texting words yesterday, I, immediately felt total rejection and unattractive and worthless. I’m not! I am a great mother and woman. I cried and was extremely hateful off and on all day yesterday. Why do I let someone else do this to me. I know that God has created me in his image. God loves me. A whole world of people love me. This man is a drug addict and I must pray for him instead of take on these feelings. I find praying for him very difficult. Lord help me.