What a relief it is to know that others snore. And how interesting that there might be some sort of need to discuss this with my doctor. I will have to see how well I can put my brave on the next time I see him.
Seriously, I don’t know that I could make the words, “I snore” come out of my mouth without turning 15 shades of red. I might just have to write it out on a little note and slip it across his desk before bolting out the door.
“Dear Doctor… I snore. And my blog readers are concerned. Some think I need a machine of some sorts. I can not talk about this in person. So, if we can kindly discuss this through email, that would be bomb-diggity.”
On a completely different note, thank you for your sweet encouragement yesterday. I am excited about “Made to Crave.” I really am. And since the books are in the process of being printed right now, it’s not really an option to back off from this project. But I will let you in on a little author secret.
When a book comes out- no matter who the author is- he or she goes through this period of feeling a little exposed. Like worse than having to tell your family doctor you snore. It feels a bit like standing in front of a group of people in a completely vulnerable state and having them critique your body.
Readers weigh in with their opinions. There are editorial reviews. There’s a star ranking system on Amazon and other places where the book can be purchased. And then there are the sales numbers and projections and assessments. And while all of this stuff shouldn’t matter, I don’t know a person alive who can walk through this process unaffected.
Make no mistake- it’s an honor to write a book. It is. I am so thankful that people want to publish what I write. And I have willingly signed up for this process. But it’s not all fun, fun, fun.
I bet you can relate to this on some level. Anytime we put ourselves out there in any way, we can feel exposed. Going on a job interview. Waiting for people to RSVP for our party. I even felt it when I made cookies for the school bake sale- no one wants their cookies to be the last ones standing.
Some people call this insecurity. I call it normal. So, what’s a girl to do?
Don’t let people’s compliments go to your head and don’t let their criticisms go to your heart.
To the depth we do either of these things, is to the depth we’ll be ruled by what other people think of us. And boy is it dangerous to build the stability of our identity on the fickle opinions of others.
Each day, let God whisper the truth of who you are and whose you are in your heart and mind. Filter the opinions of others through the reality that just because they think it- doesn’t make it true. Be brave enough to see negative feedback as a possible call to action but not a definition of your identity. And while you enjoy the positive feedback refuse to get bloated by it.
“Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things,” (Colossians 3: 1-2).
thank you for being so transparent…it is so encouraging to know that even those we admire struggle with the same issues…thank you for your encouragement!
Very good word. I grew up with a critical mom, leaving me extremely sensetive to criticism and unable to take compliments. God’s been working on that in me, so this is a timely message. Thank you! Somehow your blog gets right to my heart every time.
Such a good truth for today. Thank you for your reminder to set my mind where it belongs… above!
Lysa, this was so good for me to read today. I love your honesty and your heart.
What a heart lifting story. My husband is constantly telling me just because they say it with conviction doesn,t make it so. God bless you!
I have started a diet on Monday to prepare myself for Made to Crave. I am super duper excited bout this! I’m praying for God to bless and strengthen you and your team!
Oh Lysa… This:
“Don’t let people’s compliments go to your head and don’t let their criticisms go to your heart.”
God has you right where you are for a reason and you mentor me and thousands in a thousand ways and I’ll never be able to thank you enough.
Frankly, I look ahead with trembling knees.
Your wise words here gird the terrified hearts.
*Thank you,* friend…
All’s grace,
Ann
Oh my goodness! You are so right on. I need to be reminded of that every day. Thank you.
Bless you for taking the risk.
Thank you for taking the risk.
Jesus used you today to encourage me….We’ve been taking some heavy hits as a pastor’s family struggling with big issues with our son adopted from India….I needed to be reminded of this perspective…
Don’t let people’s compliments go to your head and don’t let their criticisms go to your heart. ~ This is something I am going to hold onto. Thank you for this post! So simple yet so profound.
So good Lysa! A quote that came to my mind, “I pray you have thick skin and a tender heart!!” Thanks for your words once again!!
So beautiful, Lysa!
I’m going to use your quote “Don’t let people’s compliments go to your head and don’t let their criticisms go to your heart.” on my Facebook page status. This resonated right to my heart….I wished I had heard/understood this many years ago as it would have saved me alot of broken heart moments. God bless you! Martha
Lysa – Snoring is serious business. I have sleep apnea and if I snore I go for long periods without breathing . Then I have reduced oxygen in my system which eventually after snoring a long time (number of years) affects my heart muscle. That is why we used to have heart attacks for unknown reason. Now with the cpap machine it forces us to breathe. God can heal us and He has healed some of sleep apnea but Ask your doctor for a sleep test. It is not worth the risk when the new technology out there has helped so many people. My son picked up my apnea spells and basically saved my life. The specialist told me I stopped breathing 700 times in a 8 hour sleep test at a sleep lab. My average Oxygen saturation was 65%. Our normal is supposed to be above 96%. I am a registered nurse and have encouraged many to get tested and many have come back to me and said thank you. I think it was God that you mentioned it because of the call and destiny God has for you. Blessings Jeanie D.
Dear Lysa,
Thank you for always blessing us with such motivational words.
Blessings,
Cheryl
Dear Lysa,
Thank you for sharing your driving contract for teens. My oldest is still a few years away from driving but I do want to have a contract for him when he does start driving.
Thanks,
Melissa
thank you for your post ‘compliments and critisisms!’ Wow! I stumbled upon your sight today for the first time… not even sure how- and am amazed how God has spoken to me through this article (and other things that I’ve seemingly ‘run into’ or heard of lately!)
I have been struggling and questioning myself whether or not I have done the right thing: I have recently separated myself from a very close and intimate friend who has been progressively getting more critical as the years of our friendship go by. At first I, unfortunately, found her mocking or critical comments regarding others as humorous. This later turned into myself getting into the gossip of it and critical myself. But, eventually I found myself offended when the criticalness was toward a fellow sister-in-christ or fellow church member that I really liked (who simply might just do things ‘differently’ then us), and then ashamed that I had either engaged in the same behavior, or had not spoken up for the person being criticized. Finally, she apparently felt comfortable enough to start criticizing a beloved member of my family which angered and hurt me deeply.
I am having a really hard time telling my friend why we are not as close as we once were. I have told her, very simply with very few words, that I love her, but just can’t have criticalness in my life. But, I am fearful of having a detailed conversation due to the very same reason I have built my wall: the criticism.
I am sad, hurt, grieving the loss of a friend, and uncertain as to where to go from here. But, am so blessed to be reminded that I am at least doing the right thing by NOT allowing the criticisms of others, anymore, to take hold of my life. thank you (Any feedback or suggestions would be great!)
I come to this blog a few days late, but it is perfect timing for me. You see, my in-laws visit today and I was preparing my psyche for battle! Thanks for these words of encouragement and freedom. Their criticisms can not affect me when I focus on “above”. My identity is not based on their approval, but on the knowledge of whose daughter I really am — our loving Father.
I actually just made that confession to my doctor several weeks ago. After some test, I have been diagnosed with sleep apnea. I am waiting to go in for the night visit where they will attach several of the mask to see which one works best for me. It is still hard for me to admit my weight issues to anyone. I have prayed for God’s help in handling this. I have thyroid problems and take medication, but still the weight hangs on. Maybe this is how God meant for me to look. I just pray I can accept this. The only thing I ever lie about is my weight.
So, I am a teacher and a parent decided to hurl criticism my way. I was really feeling down because I really am called by God to do what I do and I do a good job. And then I read, “don’t let the criticisms go to our hearts.” My oh my how God works in wonderful ways to give you just exactly what you need when you are in the midst of trouble. Thanks for the post, because the devil isn’t getting me down today!
Dear Lysa, I like what you said about not letting people’s compliments go to your head and don’t let their criticism’s go to your heart. So many girls and women are hit today with the world telling them that they have to be stick thin or look a certain way to gain acceptance. I am glad that we have a God who loves us no matter what we look like!
I just had this conversation today with a dear friend regarding the release of my first fitness DVD. I had the opportunity to submit it to a major distributor and I was affraid of the review. I was affraid they’d watch it say I was cheesy or the workout wasn’t realistic. I know it’s good and I’ve had friends who purchased the DVD and actually did it call me and say they hate me. In fitness, that’s a major compliment.
Anyway, I think I’ll post that last paragraph on my bathroom mirror and mirror and meditate on that. Thank you Lysa for your willingness to give so much of yourself. I swear that you must be in my head…
TELL IT SISTER!! Lysa – You rock girl! Thank you for being so honest and realistic. God has his hand on you in a big way!!
The defects in myself are the very ones I criticize others about. When I feel down on myself, I take it out on others by noticing every little flaw and then I eat. So fat I am. Looking forward to reading your book about craving God and not food. So here I go poisoning my self with overeating because I am really feeling bad about myself and taking it out on others. Those women who give me the nasty looks and comments are most likely seeing in me what they also hate about themself. Maybe they see something in me they want for themself. Now that I am aware of this problem area, it is up to me to stop the cycle in myself. I won’t be worried with someone else’s mental agenda, but I can correct my own. I’ve got a lot of work to do.
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I never realized what you stated that authors go through critiques by others i hope the book is a success
There’s obviously a lot to know about this. I believe you produced some beneficial factors in Features also.
Keep working , terrific task!
“Don’t let people’s compliments go to your head and don’t let their criticisms go to your heart.
To the depth we do either of these things, is to the depth we’ll be ruled by what other people think of us. And boy is it dangerous to build the stability of our identity on the fickle opinions of others. ”
LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS!!! THANK YOU!